What the HELL Were You Thinking?

Show Notes Episode 270: Donwanna Be An American Idiot

This week Host Dave Bledsoe has a reading by a noted astrologer who predicts he will stiff her on the fee. (Uncanny how accurate that was!) On the show this week we talk about how everything is just so damn dumb right now. (It’s a recurring topic.)

Along the way we visit an article from UK Vice who takes men to task for not liking popular things, and we take the popular things to task for being really stupid. Then we spend some time with the newest contender to the office of President of the United States, Kanye West. (We are totally serious, we are not Kanye is.) While the idea sounds absurd, we remind you that we all thought the current occupant was absurd when he came down that escalator! (Remember how we laughed? No one is laughing now.) To further demonstrate how stupid things are, we then dig in with a Twitter hack that was so transparently a hack that no one could possibly believe it was true. (So naturally a bunch people thought it was true.) Then we have some bad news about your cousin who is in jail in Jakarta, so we are gonna need you to go to the CVS and buy a bunch of Apple gift cards to get him out of jail. (Don’t worry, you can trust us, just give us the number on the back of the card.)

Our Sponsor this week is the Celebrity Control Corporation, don’t let your meal ticket ruin your sweet deal, call Celebrity Control Corporation. We open the show with Dennis Miller, when he was still sane and close with Robyn Adele Anderson with a new take on an American classic in classic American style!

Show Theme: https://www.jamendo.com/track/421668/prelude-to-common-sense

The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

The Show on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/whatthehellpodcast/

The Show on Soundcloud https://soundcloud.com/david-bledsoe-4

www.whatthehellpodcast.com

Give us your money on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/Whatthehellpodcast

The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music: https://youtu.be/WhqokQ-BEpA

We are a proud member of the Seltzer Kings Podcast Network!

Citations Needed:

Why Men Think It's Sooo Cool to Dislike Popular Things

https://www.vice.com/en_uk/article/v7gzb8/why-men-like-to-dislike-popular-things

FILES NEW DOCS FOR 2020 PRESIDENTIAL RUN

https://www.tmz.com/2020/07/16/kanye-west-2020-fec-form-2-president-presidential-run/

Kanye Has Been Working to Get on the 2020 Ballot

https://nymag.com/intelligencer/2020/07/kanyes-short-lived-attempt-to-get-on-the-2020-ballot.html

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Show Notes Episode 269: A Snitch Fairy Gets Her Wings!

This week Host Dave Bledsoe reminisces about that one time he thought about committing a crime but totally didn’t. (As opposed to all the times he thought about a crime and then DID.) On the show this week we examine the strange and not all suspicious life and deeds of Jeffery Epstein’s Lady Goon Ghislaine Maxwell. (Women can be Goons too, people! Stop being sexist!)

Along the way we learn about her early life as a London socialite in the 1980’s and how she traded it for the life of a Manhattan socialite in the 1990’s (Different club names, same cocaine!) Then we learn how she met, fell in love and eventually began procuring grooming and exploiting young girls for the carnal desires of her #1 Dude Jeff! (Let’s not forget all the times she joined in with all the sexual assaulting!) From there we discuss her whereabouts over the past year, her capture and eventual “accidental” death in the Manhattan Correctional Facility later on this month! (Keep your calendars open folks!)

Our Sponsor this week is Hank’s Hideouts, on the run, on a budget, Hanks Hideouts! We are sure we can do better than New Hampshire. We open the show with the happy sounds of a Snitch Fairy getting her wings and close with Ozzymozzy explaining what befell Ghislaine alone in her cell!

Show Theme: https://www.jamendo.com/track/421668/prelude-to-common-sense

The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

The Show on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/whatthehellpodcast/

The Show on Soundcloud https://soundcloud.com/david-bledsoe-4

www.whatthehellpodcast.com

Give us your money on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/Whatthehellpodcast

The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music: https://youtu.be/BABlxmIErCI

We are a proud member of the Seltzer Kings Podcast Network!

Citations Needed:

The mystery of Ghislaine Maxwell's secret love, Mail on Sunday, 15/11/1992

https://www.reddit.com/r/Epstein/comments/ch6g3r/the_mystery_of_ghislaine_maxwells_secret_love/

Ghislaine Maxwell

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ghislaine_Maxwell

What was Ghislaine Maxwell doing in a tiny New Hampshire town?

https://www.bostonglobe.com/2020/07/07/metro/ghislaine-maxwells-new-hampshire/

"Queen for a Day" - how Ghislaine Maxwell could be striking a deal with prosecutors

https://www.wpbf.com/article/queen-for-a-day-how-ghislaine-maxwell-could-be-striking-a-deal-with-prosecutors/33253619#

Official: Feds feared Epstein confidant might kill herself

https://apnews.com/80e1d24b3111582256de4fb788fc4fc2

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Episode 268: Dude, the Preferred Nomenclature is Orcish American

This week Host Dave Bledsoe dusts off his 1st Edition Monster Manual and confirms Orcs are in fact. Lawful Evil. (We hope this settles the controversy once and for all) On the show this week we examine the latest in our endless series of profound and yet profoundly silly cultural wars: are imaginary creatures from a game racist. (Answer, yes and no.)

Along the way we discover the violent history of pre-teen boys and that most of them are deeply terrified of girls. (Dave certainly was.) Then we dig into why Wizards of the Coast, the publishers of Dungeons and Dragons decided to announce that “evil races” would be phased out of 5th Edition and the reactions on both sides of the cultural aisle to this news. (We are sure everything progressed in a calm and rational manner!) We move on to freely acknowledge the problematic nature of some elements of the game and the people who created said game. But we also point out that much of original mythology only appears racist today because a bunch of racists ruined the mythology for everyone. (That happens a lot in history.) Finally, we proffer a compromise to both sides of the issue based on long established rules within the game. (Yep, advertisers actually paid to run ads on this content.)

Our Sponsor this week is The Gnoll Society, who want you to know they are Evil and they like it that way. We open the show with peckish Uruks and close with Dragonland and their martial music for Orcs!

Show Theme: https://www.jamendo.com/track/421668/prelude-to-common-sense

The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

The Show on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/whatthehellpodcast/

The Show on Soundcloud https://soundcloud.com/david-bledsoe-4

www.whatthehellpodcast.com

Give us your money on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/Whatthehellpodcast

The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music: https://youtu.be/OOAHmTPx910

We are a proud member of the Seltzer Kings Podcast Network!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Show Notes Episode 267: Boom Boom, On Come the Lights

This week Host Dave Bledsoe revels in the fact that he may be a drunk with no sense of self preservation, but even HE won’t shoot off fireworks from his crotch! (Unless you pay him.) On the show this week we ask the same question all of you are asking: WHO THE FUCK IS SETTING OFF FIREWORKS AT THREE AM!?!?

Along the way we examine such hot button issues as using Irish Spring soap to taunt white people and why white people can’t mind their own fucking business. (Y’all are gonna get the Spring again!) From there we jump to the cultural implications of fireworks and why Americans just love to blow bits off their body off for funsies. We check in on a new conspiracy theory popular in the Blue States for a change and examine all the ways they are wrong about the Summer of Boom. (Come on Libs, you are supposed to be better than this!) Then we wrap up with how YOU, podfriends, could get your OWN illegal fireworks in the big city. (In a purely hypothetical and legally allowed speculative manner.)

Our Sponsor this week is Bubba’s House of BOOM!, where fat, drunk and stupid is our demographic! We open the show this week with fireworks gone wrong and close with Bluesix letting us know they are sick and tired of all these fireworks. 

Other, Probably Better Pods: http://seltzerkings.com/

Show Theme: https://www.jamendo.com/track/421668/prelude-to-common-sense

The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

The Show on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/whatthehellpodcast/

The Show on Soundcloud https://soundcloud.com/david-bledsoe-4

www.whatthehellpodcast.com

Give us your money on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/Whatthehellpodcast

The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music: https://youtu.be/s6NIgSfzNGU

Citations Needed:

Boompilled: Fireworks Conspiracy Theories Are Bursting Across The Internet

https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/craigsilverman/boompilled-fireworks-conspiracy-theories-are-bursting

The Fireworks Conspiracy Theory is Ridiculous and Totally Unnecessary

https://themikerothschild.com/2020/06/23/fireworks-conspiracy-theory/

Gita Jackson on Twitter

https://twitter.com/xoxogossipgita/status/1275134634981052418?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This week Host Dave Bledsoe explains why you can’t go home again. (Turns out, no one wants him there!) On the show this week we examine why Reuben Kincaid and the Partridge Family want to burn down small town America! (Fucking HIPPIES!) 

Along the way we talk of the panic in Frog Fart as imaginary buses filled with black clad (and possibly Black) people swarm the Walmart's and Bait Shops of the Heartland! (Won’t someone think of the night crawlers!) We travel to all the spots where brave Camosexuals gathered outside guns stores and bowling alleys to prevent Antifa from burning down a place they never heard of could care less about if they had (Honestly, NO ONE is visiting Crotch Rot Arkansas willingly.) Then we learn the secret history of Antifa, from it’s ill fated beginning fighting ACTUAL Nazis in Germany to busting Skinhead skulls outside out of Slash’s House of Punk in Poughkeepsie in the 1990’s all the way to punching fucking Richard Spencer in his smug Nazi face at Trump’s inauguration! (We watch it over and over on slo-mo!) Then we explain why people in Cooterville are so afraid of a non-existent Antifa threat by telling you about Orson Wells. (Trust us, it fits together better than these things usually do.)

Our Sponsor this week is Rent-A-Radical, when you want a fake Antia invasion but are too insignificant for REAL Antifa! We open the show with our Godson Trae Crowder (we wish!) and close with some teenage heartthrobs of the 1970’s!  

Show Theme: https://www.jamendo.com/track/421668/prelude-to-common-sense

The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

The Show on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/whatthehellpodcast/

The Show on Soundcloud https://soundcloud.com/david-bledsoe-4

www.whatthehellpodcast.com 

Give us your money on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/Whatthehellpodcast

The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music: https://youtu.be/lT2T49yP2ew

Citations Needed:

Tucker Carlson: “Violent young men with guns will be in charge. They will make the rules, including the rules in your neighborhood”

https://www.mediamatters.org/tucker-carlson/tucker-carlson-violent-young-men-guns-will-be-charge-they-will-make-rules-including

Fears of protest violence, some of it fueled by rumors, creep into Sacramento suburbs

https://www.sacbee.com/news/article243186451.html

The Incident on the A-Road

https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/akzem5/the-incident-on-the-a-road

Family reportedly harassed in Forks after being accused of being members of Antifa

https://www.peninsuladailynews.com/crime/family-harassed-in-forks-after-being-accused-of-being-members-of-antifa/

‘Antifa bus’ hoaxes are spreading panic through small-town America

https://www.theverge.com/2020/6/5/21281581/antifa-bus-hoax-trump-misinformation-protests-police

The Myth of the War of the Worlds Panic

https://slate.com/culture/2013/10/orson-welles-war-of-the-worlds-panic-myth-the-infamous-radio-broadcast-did-not-cause-a-nationwide-hysteria.html

In Ecuador, after the green men from Mars invaded, the real tragedy began

https://www.miamiherald.com/news/nation-world/world/americas/article1960647.html

Roofing Company Employees Forced Onto Ground At Gunpoint By Man Who Thought They Were Antifa

https://www.9news.com/article/news/investigations/loveland-man-antifa-roofing-employees/73-c9e63588-b99d-45c5-bc34-81e22093cf91

 “They have no allegiance to liberal democracy”: An expert on antifa explains the group

https://www.vox.com/2017/8/25/16189064/protests-george-floyd-antifa-president-trump

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Episode 265: The Pig Was Cool

This week Host Dave Bledsoe explains how his life coach has always been Jimmy McNulty from The Wire. (Yeah, we can see it.) On the show this week we tackle the idea of a world without police. (Imagine that!)

Along the way we learn how Dave wandered into his early life career as a cop. (The same way he wanders into a dive bar, apathy and laziness.) Later we learn how he wandered right back out of the job. (Ironically, it was the same way he LEAVES a dive bar, by being thrown out!) Along the way we learn about one of the Bad Dave's in the world who “trains” cops to treat citizens like insurgents. Then we examine in detail what people mean when they say “Defund the Police” only to learn it isn’t the scary idea the cops want you to think it is. (Kinda like how Black people are not scary like the cops say they are!) Then we offer some actionable ways to implement real change in the police without scaring all the white folks with “crazy ideas”. (Which will make young progressive call us names because the ideas aren’t crazy enough.)

Our Sponsor this week is Fat Leo’s Law Enforcement Training, when you just want a glassy eyed sociopath on the street, you want Fat Leo’s. We open the show with Rust Cohle philosophy of policing and close with Killdozer’s run in with Dave on duty!

Show Theme: https://www.jamendo.com/track/421668/prelude-to-common-sense

The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

The Show on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/whatthehellpodcast/

The Show on Soundcloud https://soundcloud.com/david-bledsoe-4

www.whatthehellpodcast.com

Give us your money on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/Whatthehellpodcast

The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music: https://youtu.be/ZljN2Y-9_bQ

Citations Needed:

The sheep, the wolf and the sheep dog

https://www.policeone.com/police-trainers/videos/the-sheep-the-wolf-and-the-sheep-dog-PgBzHLbBumSiCwHl/

“Are You Prepared to Kill Somebody?” A Day With One of America’s Most Popular Police Trainers

https://www.motherjones.com/politics/2017/02/dave-grossman-training-police-militarization/

Defund the police? Here’s what that really means.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/2020/06/07/defund-police-heres-what-that-really-means/

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices