Scientists just used artificial intelligence to design the world's first AI-generated viruses capable of hunting down and killing drug-resistant strains of E. coli. These bacteriophages look like tiny alien pineapples with syringes that stab bacterial cells, and they're just the beginning of AI-created life. From Matt's dream of dish-cleaning bacteria that won't eat you (hopefully) to the accidental discovery that trying to make super purple petunias actually created white flowers instead, this episode explores what the if happens when computers start writing genetic code. Discover why we're running out of antibiotics, how a virus with only 11 genes works, and why your future dish soap bottle might say "now with AI inside." Plus, learn about the scientist who tried to engineer the most purple petunias ever and accidentally won a Nobel Prize instead.

Based on "World's First AI Designed Viruses: A Step Towards AI Generated Life" by Katie Kavanagh, published in Nature on September 19, 2025. https://www.nature.com/articles/d41586-025-03055-y

Matt also mentions a book worth checking out during the episode: "The Genealogy of a Gene: Patents, HIV/AIDS, and Race" by Myles W. Jackson, published by MIT Press. The book explores how intellectual property law has transformed scientific research through the fascinating story of the CCR5 gene, examining everything from Big Pharma to personalized medicine. Learn more at https://mitpress.mit.edu/9780262533782/the-genealogy-of-a-gene/

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Find out more about Gaby's science fiction short story!

Here are the links for the anthology. The physical copy can be ordered here : https://www.neonhemlock.com/books/luminescent-machinations-queer-tales-of-monumental-invention

The ebook can be ordered here: https://www.neonhemlock.com/ebooks/luminescent-machinations-queer-tales-of-monumental-invention

What the if your brain literally ran out of storage space like a laptop refusing to save one more file? Neuroscientist Nikolay Kukushkin explains how memory isn't a filing cabinet but more like water carving rivers down a mountain - and when you carve too many paths, everything becomes a muddy mess. Discover why Mr. S, who remembered everything perfectly, couldn't recognize faces or taste food because his brain was too full of details. Learn why sleep is your brain's nightly cleanup crew and why we're all currently running at 98% memory capacity thanks to information overload. Plus, find out why forgetting your ex might also wipe out your algebra skills, and how even your kidney cells form their own minute-by-minute memories.

Our guest is Nikolay Kukushkin, neuroscientist at NYU and author of "One Hand Clapping: Unraveling the Mystery of the Human Mind." You can learn more about Nikolay's fascinating book at https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/One-Hand-Clapping/Nikolay-Kukushkin/9781493090648

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Check out our membership rewards! Visit us at Patreon.com/Whattheif

Got an IF of your own? Want to have us consider your idea for a show topic? Send YOUR IF to us! Email us at [email protected] and let us know what's in your imagination. No idea is too small, or too big!Keep On IFFin',Philip, Matt & Gaby

What the if gravitational waves were big enough to see and feel? Instead of measuring distortions smaller than a proton, imagine watching your coffee table accordion in and out as ripples from distant black hole collisions pass through your local cafe. Every time Charlie the cat bats a toy mouse in Greenwich Village, sugar cubes scrunch in Williamsburg cafes. Brain surgeons would need to ask all of New York to sit perfectly still during operations to avoid gravitational interference. Even parking lots would seem impossibly far away one moment and right next to you the next as space itself stretches and compresses. From squirrels disrupting billion-dollar physics experiments to the strange world of noise-canceling gravity waves, discover why LIGO's incredible ability to detect universe-shaking events that distort space by one ten-thousandth the width of a proton might actually be humanity's most impressive scientific achievement.

Based on "Happy Birthday, LIGO. Now Drop Dead." by Dennis Overby, published in The New York Times on September 10, 2025: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/09/10/science/gravitational-waves-ligo-black-holes.html?unlocked_article_code=1.nE8.QM2f.ag_83DD_kR8e&smid=url-share

Learn More:

"Gravity's Kiss: The Detection of Gravitational Waves" - https://mitpress.mit.edu/9780262535120/gravitys-kiss/ Matt mentioned sociologist Harry Collins' nearly 900-page masterpiece about gravity wave detection as the first book he ever reviewed; find this comprehensive account of one of science's most remarkable discoveries written by someone embedded in the gravitational wave community for over 40 years.

Professor Tiffany Nichols - https://cssh.northeastern.edu/faculty/tiffany-nichols/ Matt recommended his friend Tiffany's dissertation (soon to be a book) about how LIGO chose their detection sites; explore her research on the epic story of selecting locations for these mile-long instruments and how surrounding environments become part of the scientific process.

What are Gravitational Waves - https://www.ligo.caltech.edu/page/what-are-gw Learn about the ripples in space-time that we imagined making visible in our thought experiment, including how these waves from colliding black holes create distortions 10,000 times smaller than an atomic nucleus.

What is LIGO - https://www.ligo.caltech.edu/page/what-is-ligo Discover how this unique observatory uses 4-kilometer-long laser interferometers to detect the universe's most violent events, from the instrument that Matt described as humanity's most sensitive measurement device.

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Find out more about Gaby's science fiction short story!

Here are the links for the anthology. The physical copy can be ordered here : https://www.neonhemlock.com/books/luminescent-machinations-queer-tales-of-monumental-invention

The ebook can be ordered here: https://www.neonhemlock.com/ebooks/luminescent-machinations-queer-tales-of-monumental-invention

What the if you found a rock on Mars that might - emphasis on might - show signs of ancient life? NASA's Perseverance rover discovered intriguing leopard spots in a 3.5-billion-year-old rock that contain vivianite, a mineral that could potentially indicate biological activity, though scientists remain cautiously skeptical. These dark-outlined splotches bear some resemblance to patterns that microbes can leave behind, but resemblance isn't proof. Join our trio as they explore the painstaking scientific process of investigating possible signs of life from tens of millions of miles away using lasers, spectroscopes, and instruments cleverly named Sherlock and Watson. From "poppy seed" nodules to the methodical work of ruling out every conceivable non-biological explanation, discover why scientists are being extraordinarily careful about what could potentially be intriguing evidence - if it survives rigorous scrutiny.

Based on "In a Rock on Mars, NASA Sees Clearest Sign of Life (So Far)" by Kenneth Chang, published in The New York Times on September 10, 2025

Read the full article here: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/09/10/science/mars-rock-nasa-perserverance.html?unlocked_article_code=1.lE8.UiKA.kl-1r33U-Pd9&smid=url-share

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Find out more about Gaby's science fiction short story!

Here are the links for the anthology. The physical copy can be ordered here : https://www.neonhemlock.com/books/luminescent-machinations-queer-tales-of-monumental-invention

The ebook can be ordered here: https://www.neonhemlock.com/ebooks/luminescent-machinations-queer-tales-of-monumental-invention

Our guest this week is science fiction author Nicholas Casbarro, who brings us a universe-changing concept from his novel Vitalerium - a radioactive space rock that enables faster-than-light travel. What the if humans discovered this exotic material so powerful that a fist-sized chunk can propel a football field-sized spaceship at 12 times the speed of light? Matt helps us explore the real science behind faster-than-light travel, from grandfather paradoxes and causality violations to the vast scale of our galaxy and the communication delays that would plague interstellar colonies. Join us as we chart a course through the galaxy's most mind-bending possibilities.

Born in Providence, Rhode Island, in 1990, Nicholas Casbarro attended Northeastern University’s Doctor of Physical Therapy Program in Boston, class of 2013. Though he never practiced, he maintained his curiosity and love for the sciences. After college, he worked in the medical device field with a specialty in wound-healing and burn treatment. In 2021, he joined a regenerative medicine company where he would spend five days a week on a plane, traveling the country to work with burn surgeons and victims. While flying, he experienced a spark of inspiration, and decided to follow the thread. Since childhood, he had a deep love for science fiction, growing to appreciate the greats in sci-fi like Aldous Huxley, George Orwell, Frank Herbert, Isaac Asimov, and many others. Nicholas used his time on countless flights to create the Vitalerium Series and its universe. The majority of the Vitalerium novel was written at 36,000 feet. He has seven books planned in the Vitalerium Series and continues to craft the narrative of Roman Matthews.

Learn more about Nick’s novel, “Vitalerium” at his website: https://vitaleriumseries.com

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Check out our membership rewards! Visit us at Patreon.com/Whattheif

Got an IF of your own? Want to have us consider your idea for a show topic? Send YOUR IF to us! Email us at [email protected] and let us know what's in your imagination. No idea is too small, or too big!

Don’t miss an episode! Subscribe at WhatTheIF.com

Keep On IFFin',Philip, Matt & Gaby

D'oh! We had technical difficulties this week and so we are presenting this encore presentation of one of our most popular episodes.

It also happens to be Kirby's birthday, and we're eager to honor his awesomeness by sharing with you this fabulous episode we did with him on December 16, 2021. Enjoy the ride!

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DR. KIRBY RUNYON is a planetary geomorphologist and morphodynamicist seeking to understand the evolution of planetary landscapes and the associated near-surface processes through the analysis of remote sensing imagery and laboratory experiments. He is a science team affiliate on the New Horizons mission to Pluto, Charon, and the Kuiper Belt and a science team collaborator on the HiRISE (High Resolution Imagaing Science Experiment) camera currently in orbit around Mars. Kirby is passionate about engaging the general public in the passion, beauty, and joy of space exploration and promoting scientific literacy among non-scientists. He lives in Columbia, MD, with his cat, Nixie, named after Nix, a small moon of Pluto.

Read Kirby's Op-Ed in The Baltimore Sun, "Why go to space? You might as well ask: Why make music?" https://www.baltimoresun.com/opinion/op-ed/bs-ed-op-1208-space-exploration-20211208-26uthbg4v5a6fpjqlzuetqryla-story.html

Visit his website: https://kirbydanielrunyon.space

Follow him on all the socials:

Twitter: @nasaman58

Instagram: @kirbydanielrunyon

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kirby.runyon

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Got an IF of your own? Want to have us consider your idea for a show topic? Send YOUR IF to us! Email us at [email protected] and let us know what's in your imagination. No idea is too small, or too big!

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Keep On IFFin',

Philip, Matt & Gaby

What the if the speed of light crawled along at walking speed instead of zipping around at 300,000 kilometers per second? Tracey McCallum from Ontario wondered about this scenario. Imagine reaching for your cat only to grab empty air because she's already somewhere else entirely. Baseball becomes a black-hole-creating death sport when pitchers throw faster than light speed. Concert audiences sing different verses simultaneously depending on their distance from the stage. Fiber optic internet becomes slower than carrier pigeons. Anyone wanting to outlive their annoying roommate just needs to jog around the apartment for a month to age slower than everyone else. The catch? They'll also get so massive that furniture starts flying toward them. Discover how messing with the universe's speed limit turns ordinary physics into extraordinary chaos.

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Find out more about Gaby's science fiction short story!

Here are the links for the anthology. The physical copy can be ordered here : https://www.neonhemlock.com/books/luminescent-machinations-queer-tales-of-monumental-invention

The ebook can be ordered here: https://www.neonhemlock.com/ebooks/luminescent-machinations-queer-tales-of-monumental-invention

Matt & Gaby are on assignment this week, so we present an encore presentation of one of our most popular episodes. This one is super fun and comes from Sept. 16, 2024. We hope you enjoy it.

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What if humans were the latest must-have pet for trendy aliens? This episode explores the hilarious and bizarre scenario of extraterrestrial beings snatching us up like puppies from a shelter. From alien vets poking and prodding us for space parasites to the culinary delights of human kibble, we dive into the wacky world of human domestication. Discover the joys of alien fashion shows featuring humans in adorable hats, and the headaches caused by mischievous humans forming underground resistance movements at the local alien graveyard. We even ponder the age-old alien question: "Do you think my human understands me when I talk to it in Zorblaxian?" This thought-provoking "what if" scenario was suggested by listener Dan Floyd.

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Find out more about Gaby's science fiction short story!

Here are the links for the anthology. The physical copy can be ordered here : https://www.neonhemlock.com/books/luminescent-machinations-queer-tales-of-monumental-invention

The ebook can be ordered here: https://www.neonhemlock.com/ebooks/luminescent-machinations-queer-tales-of-monumental-invention

What the if there was a nuclear reactor on the moon? NASA wants to launch a 100-kilowatt nuclear reactor to the lunar surface before 2030, powerful enough to run about 80 households. From the terrifying "tickling the dragon's tail" experiments at Los Alamos where scientists held uranium chunks apart with just a screwdriver, to the reality that plutonium feels "like holding a rabbit" when you touch it, explore how chain reactions work and why control rods keep reactors from exploding. Because nothing says "home sweet home" like splitting atoms 240,000 miles from Earth.

Based on "NASA Is Getting Fired Up About a Nuclear Reactor on the Moon" by Kenneth Chang, published in The New York Times on Aug. 6, 2025 https://www.nytimes.com/2025/08/06/science/nasa-nuclear-reactor-moon.html?unlocked_article_code=1.ck8.Dvm_.ld6cKROnhA6r&smid=url-share

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Find out more about Gaby's science fiction short story!

Here are the links for the anthology. The physical copy can be ordered here : https://www.neonhemlock.com/books/luminescent-machinations-queer-tales-of-monumental-invention

The ebook can be ordered here: https://www.neonhemlock.com/ebooks/luminescent-machinations-queer-tales-of-monumental-invention

Anne from Queens, a longtime listener and proud sticker-carrying Patreon supporter, inspired this week's episode by asking: what the if humans couldn't sweat? Discover a world where everyone walks around panting like dogs with their tongues hanging out, cities install massive water pipeline infrastructure for knee-deep living rooms, and portable misters become as essential as smartphones. From the science of why dogs can't sweat to the physics of evaporative cooling, explore how we'd adapt with everything from swamp coolers to giant handheld fans. Just remember: in this world, breaking a sweat is literally impossible!

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Find out more about Gaby's science fiction short story!

Here are the links for the anthology. The physical copy can be ordered here : https://www.neonhemlock.com/books/luminescent-machinations-queer-tales-of-monumental-invention

The ebook can be ordered here: https://www.neonhemlock.com/ebooks/luminescent-machinations-queer-tales-of-monumental-invention