When Harry Met Fatty

This is certainly one doodle that can’t be undid.  Remember 2007?   Bush was on his way out and our brains were fried over-easy on a home skillet called Juno, starring Ellen Page, Jason Reitman, Jennifer Garner and the color orange. The story is simple:  Girl meets boy, girl gets preggo, and girl Leggos her baby to some super well-off peeps.  Then girl decides to re-meet boy.  All in a semester’s work, half pint!

Eddie Money doesn’t want to let you go ‘till you see the light..and we don’t want to let you go ‘till you see this flick.  That’s right folks, they all can’t be stinkers!  Take Me Home Tonight Starring Topher Grace, Anna Faris and Dan Folger.  It’s the late Eighties, mateys, and Topher, who’s a recent graduate of MIT (yeah you know me), is working at Suncoast video, refining his quarter life crisis. He runs into his former highschool crush and accompanies her to a Labor Day party, lying about what he does for a living.  A BMW is stolen, cocaine is consumed, dance offs are had and some P.Y.Ts get busy on a trampoline. Party Hardy, Marty!  

The Wedding Singer becomes a dead ringer!  In 2011’s Just Go With It, Adam Sandler plays house with Jennifer Aniston in order to woo a swimsuit model.  Oh what a tangled web they weave when they first practice to deceive...if only we could deceive ourselves from ever watching this in the first place.  This is an unintentional horror film about what happens when you decide to leave your wedding ring on when you go get a drink.  Spoiler alert, they end up in Hawaii, and we end up gettin’ Hawaiian punch-drunk.

You break it you buy it and boy did we ever!  Breaking Dawn Pt. 1 starring Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner and one wrecked Honeymoon Suite that will surely be in need of a good Priceline Negotiator.  As Stephenie Meyer’s Twilight Saga draws to a close, Breaking Dawn Pt. One teaches us one valuable lesson:  When you marry your high school sweetheart, be sure to get something old, something new, something Borrowed and something OHMYGOD she’s pregnant!  Pattinson may not be a one-pump-chump, but this situation is certainly a one-hump-baby-bump!  It’s like MTV’s 16 and pregnant on Quaaludes…and guest starring a bunch of talking wolves.  Join us as we dish on our very first unintentional romantic comedy!

Hey!  You got your Chauvinism in my Chivalry. Hey!  You got your Chivalry in my Chauvinism.  Two great tastes that taste great together….in HELL!  In this 2009 delight Gerard Butler makes Katherine Heigl eat a plate of humble pie, but not before he gets his just deserts!  I apologize, its after midnight and I haven’t been fed. Don’t tell Mr. Wing.  Mogwai!

Heigl, which isn’t just an exercise you do to make your vagina strong, is a romantically challenged morning show producer.  Butler is a cable access misanthrope who lands a job on her show, all the while landing a place in her heart. He’s going to show her the ropes in the game of love…but careful, Gerry, you might just end up against the ropes! 

Hollywood if she could…get Universal Healthcare…from Universal Studios that is!  This week we dig up a 1991 Country Time Lemonade classic starring Michael J. Fox and Julie Warner, (who can’t seem to find her bathing suit from time to time). MJF is on his way to Beverly Hills to be a plastic surgeon when he takes a detour that leads him directly to his true heart’s desire!

Dave and Noah are still housesitting.  Dave waxes poetic about his former country mouse ways.  Noah reveals his secret language called Bumblef*ck, meant to be spoken only to his invisible twin…who died years ago under mysterious circumstances.

Noah obsesses over a half-eaten titty cake that was left in a locker room.  Dave talks Porsche engines and admits the real reason he no longer lives in a one-horse town.