God recognised our need for companionship when He said, ‘“It is not good for the man to be alone”…Then…God made a woman…and he brought her to the man’ (vv. 18, 22 NIV). Most of us are social beings who are at our best around others. We garner energy and support from them. But there are those who feel a sense of shame over admitting their loneliness. They long for people to share their lives with but feel they must pretend they don’t need anyone. You should not feel shame for wanting love and social connection. Admitting your desire to be loved and taking a step towards involvement actually requires courage. Accepting that you are a person who needs to connect is healthy. But problems arise when your need for companionship controls you. When you compromise your values in order to be accepted, the results are always negative. Clinging to other people without understanding who they are or what they represent is unhealthy. And the ramifications can have not only lifelong effects but sometimes also life-threatening consequences. Wise decisions about relationships are never to be made with a mind ruled by fear of loneliness or desperation. If that’s where you are, being single is a better alternative right now. It need only be temporary. So do these three things: 1) Ask God to guide you: ‘God sets the lonely in families’ (Psalm 68:6 NIV). 2) Live by the values you’d want your loved one to hold as well. 3) Start with what you have to give and share with others, rather than with your unmet needs.

© 2024. Written by Bob and Debby Gass. Used by permission under licence from UCB International.