Deconstructing Gaslighting™

When you walk through the wrong door...


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I saw a picture of a sign that read, “better to admit you walked through the wrong door than spend your life in the wrong room”. I felt that. There have been big and small ways I’ve LIVED that.

We ALL have ended up walking through the wrong door a time or two in our lives. Being able to recognize when we’ve ended up in the wrong room is crucial to living in alignment with our values in a way that is authentically us, rather living in alignment with what others want of us.

 

Today I’m going to use this context to get political. I can’t stay silent about what I’ve seen with my brain that is SO attuned to recognizing the gaslighting that happens. Not when I’m seeing such huge and harmful impact because of it.

What I want to do today is speak to those of you who may be experiencing cognitive dissonance because you are beginning to realize that you walked through the wrong door. I want to help you understand how that happened. I want to help you feel seen and understood. And I want to help you find the clarity and power to get out of the wrong room.

 

I’m Sarah Morales, the host of this podcast, and I’m so glad you’re here! If you’re new to the pod and want to know a bit more about me and the offerings I have to help people recognize the patterns of gaslighting and what’s more - heal from the effects of chronic gaslighting, please check out my website.

 

Story Time: Sarah deconstructs the "how" and "why" we end up walking through the wrong door; shares a concept she found in a Dr. Ramini video, shares a non-political example so we can see it in action, shares a personal example from her own life of walking through the wrong door, and then gets a bit political... all from a place of grace, yet wanting to speak out about the political abuse she's seeing, so that the USA can heal.

Top Take-Aways:

For those who may be in the wrong room:

  1. Give yourself grace. You were lured in because you trusted someone who used your values against you.
  2. Pay attention to when and how FEAR is guiding your decisions. When we are guided by fear, we are vulnerable to coercion.
  3. Look for the ½ truths – especially with exaggeration and distortion, and when you are noticing extreme fear.
  4. Get clear on your values and get curious around how they may be being manipulated through the aforementioned coercion.
  5. Give yourself permission to leave the room.

For those who love someone that’s stuck in the wrong room:

  1. Approach them from the place of seeing them – their values, their fears, etc.
  2. Know it’s okay to have boundaries with them.

And remember – you may have crashed and burned; been broke and hurt, walked through the wrong door - but damn it, you’re a phoenix and you’re rising again. I think it’s time we get some freedom and fly.

 

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Deconstructing Gaslighting™By Sarah Morales

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