Rebuilding safety and intimacy after betrayal begins with understanding how our attachment styles shape the way we connect—and disconnect—with others. In this eye-opening conversation, Dr. Jake Porter, Founder and President of Daring Ventures, returns to the podcast to unpack how attachment wounds form, why they matter in recovery, and how couples can move from fear and self-protection toward trust and closeness.

Drawing from his Couple-Centered Recovery® model, Dr. Porter helps us see that attachment isn’t just psychology—it’s also spiritual and neurological. Healing happens when we integrate brain science, faith, and relational repair. Whether you’re married or single, betrayed or the betrayer, this episode will help you better understand your own patterns and offer hope that broken bonds can truly be restored.

Key Takeaways from the Episode:

• Secure attachment is developed through the experience of rupture and repair—healing happens not by avoiding pain, but by working through it together.
• Attachment styles shape how we give and receive love—and how we handle disconnection.
• Marriage or “primary relationships” can become a place of profound healing for attachment wounds.
• Trust can be rebuilt through safety, consistency, and attunement.
• Brain science, relationships, and faith work together to heal deep relational pain.
• Understanding your attachment style can bring growth, not labels.
• Real healing happens when we move from fear to a secure connection.

Connect with Dr. Jake Porter: Website: www.daringventures.com Instagram: @drjakeporter

Connect with Us: Website: www.watermarkcoach.com Instagram: @watermarkcoaching Listen on: The Betrayal Recovery Transformation Podcast

Over 36 years ago, Kris sat in the classroom of her Bible college professor, Paul Marc Goulet, learning lessons that would profoundly shape her understanding of God, cognitive function, and the power of the stories we tell ourselves. Decades later, their paths cross again for a deeply meaningful conversation about how our God concepts—what we believe about who God is—shape every part of our faith, healing, and daily life.

A pastor, author, counselor, and global leader, Paul draws from his extensive background in psychology and theology to unpack the ways distorted beliefs about God can keep us trapped in emotional pain and confusion. He introduces us to one of his most impactful teachings, “the Vat,” a concept describing how our thoughts and experiences create a mental and spiritual environment that either nurtures truth or reinforces distortion.

Together, Kris and Paul explore how to reconcile our view of God with life’s hardest moments—especially for those walking through betrayal and trauma. This episode invites listeners to reframe suffering, rediscover who God really is, and find freedom in knowing His love is consistent, kind, and unwavering.

Key Takeaways from the Episode:

• Our God concept—what we subconsciously believe about God—shapes how we interpret everything in life.
• Distorted God concepts often stem from early experiences of authority, love, or rejection.
• Healing involves replacing lies about God with biblical truth and relational experiences of His character.
• “The Vat” illustrates how unprocessed pain can distort our perception of God, self, and others—and how renewal begins by changing what we allow into that space.
• Reframing the question “Why do bad things happen to good people?” opens the door to deeper faith and trust.
• Understanding God through Scripture (1 Corinthians 13:4–8) helps us see His true nature as love itself.
• True breakthrough happens when we allow God to rewrite the stories we’ve been telling ourselves.

Connect with Paul Marc Goulet: 🌐 www.paulmarcgoulet.com 📖 Books: Breakthrough, Crack the Code (coming soon) 🌍 Follow his global initiatives and leadership training in Madagascar and beyond.

Connect with Us: 🎧 Listen & Subscribe: Betrayal Recovery Transformation Podcast 🌐 Visit: www.watermarkcoach.com 📸 Follow: @watermarkcoaching 💬 Produced by Kris Rocha & Jeremy Waldridge

Stacey Smith, a trusted voice at Daring Ventures, returns to the Betrayal Recovery Transformation Podcast to unpack the often-hidden topic of spiritual abuse. With deep wisdom and a passion for justice, Stacey helps individuals heal from trauma, reclaim their identity, and walk in the truth of who God created them to be.

In this conversation, Stacey joins Kris and Jenn to explore how spiritual abuse can take root within faith communities—often cloaked in tradition or twisted theology—and how women can move from confusion and pain toward clarity, courage, and freedom. She shares how recognizing God’s true character brings restoration and empowers women to rediscover their voice and worth in Him.

Key Takeaways from the Episode:

• What spiritual abuse is and why it can be difficult to recognize
• How Scripture is sometimes misused to control or silence women
• The ways Jesus elevated and empowered women throughout His ministry
• Why silencing women in the Church diminishes God’s full expression of who He is
• How to find healing, freedom, and restored faith after spiritual harm
• Practical ways to use your voice and live in alignment with God’s truth

Connect with Stacey:

Daring Ventures: www.daringventures.com

Connect with Us:

www.watermarkcoach.com @watermarkcoaching

Thank you for listening! Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review our podcast to stay updated on future episodes and help others find the hope and support they deserve.

Sponsored by and produced with the support of www.purelifealliance.com

Gigi Hopkins, Professional Certified Coach (PCC) and Director of Wives Care at Be Broken Ministries, joins us for a candid conversation about how healing from betrayal can produce unexpected gifts. With over 24 years of ministry experience and a passion for walking alongside women in the midst of betrayal trauma, Gigi offers both professional insight and deep personal compassion. She shares her “Gifts of Betrayal” list, encouraging us to see how God can transform pain into growth, maturity, and stronger relationships.

From growing in faith to developing healthier boundaries, Gigi helps us recognize the ways God uses even the most devastating experiences to shape us into who we were created to be. Whether your marriage has ended or become stronger through healing, this conversation will remind you that hope and wholeness are possible.

Key Takeaways from the Episode:

• Healing from betrayal can strengthen faith and transform character.
• Betrayal can teach us to be better stewards of what God entrusts to us.
• True friendship often grows deeper through shared vulnerability.
• Self-awareness is a critical part of the healing process.
• Healthy boundaries lead to healthier relationships.
• Healing shifts our perspective toward eternity and lasting hope.
• Some marriages end, while others become stronger than before—both can lead to growth.

Connect with Gigi Hopkins:

• Wives Care at Be Broken Ministries: www.bebroken.org/wivescare
• Lifter of My Head Coaching: www.lifterofmyhead.org

Connect with Us:

• www.watermarkcoach.com
• @watermarkcoaching

Thank you for listening! Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review our podcast to stay updated on future episodes and help others find the hope and support they deserve.

Sponsored by and produced with the support of www.purelifealliance.com

In this special episode, we’re joined by Dr. Jake Porter, renowned relational trauma expert, coach, and founder of Daring Ventures. Known for his groundbreaking work helping individuals and couples heal from betrayal and rebuild trust, Jake brings deep insight and compassion to the recovery journey.

Together, we explore the transformative power of integrity-centered healing and learning to be comfortable being uncomfortable. Jake shares his personal experience participating in a program called Men and Women of Discomfort, and how its lessons have shaped his understanding of growth, resilience, and the human capacity to endure and overcome.

It was truly an honor to have Jake on the show. His heart for helping others heal, combined with the impactful work of Daring Ventures, continues to bring hope and clarity to those navigating some of life’s most painful chapters.

Key Takeaways:

• Get to know Dr. Jake Porter and the story behind Daring Ventures
• Why integrity is central to long-term recovery
• What Jake learned from the Men and Women of Discomfort program
• How embracing discomfort can lead to emotional, spiritual, and relational growth
• Encouragement for those walking through betrayal and rebuilding trust

Connect with Dr. Jake Porter & Daring Ventures:

🌐 www.daringventures.com

📸 Instagram: @daringventures

Connect with Watermark Coaching:

🌐 www.watermarkcoach.com

📸 Instagram: @watermarkcoaching

🌟 Thank you for listening! Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review The Betrayal Recovery Transformation Podcast. Your feedback helps us grow and ensures more people can find the hope and support they deserve.

This podcast is sponsored by and produced with the support of Pure Life Alliance.

How much truth is too much truth? What if you feel ready for disclosure, but your partner doesn't? What’s the actual goal of a therapeutic disclosure—and how do you know when you’re ready?

In this episode, we sit down with Dan Drake, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and expert in betrayal trauma and sex addiction recovery. Dan unpacks the basics of therapeutic disclosure, a structured process where the full truth of sexual betrayal is disclosed in a safe, supported setting. He shares the potential risks and profound benefits of doing disclosure correctly, and clears up common misconceptions, especially among the men preparing to disclose and the women bracing for impact.

Whether you’re just beginning the recovery process or preparing for a formal disclosure, this conversation offers compassionate guidance, clinical insight, and hope for deeper healing on the other side of the truth.

About Our Guest: Dan Drake, LMFT, LPCC, CCPS-S, CSAT-S, is the founder of The Banyan Group, a therapy and coaching practice specializing in betrayal trauma, compulsive sexual behavior, and couples recovery. With over 20 years of clinical experience, Dan is widely respected for his work helping couples rebuild trust through the process of therapeutic disclosure and long-term recovery. Learn more about Dan’s work at www.thebanyangroup.org.

Key Topics Discussed:

• What is therapeutic disclosure, and why does it matter?
• How do you know if you're ready for a disclosure (as the betrayed or the betrayer)?
• What role does the polygraph play in disclosure, and when is it helpful?
• Why disclosure isn't just a one-time confession but a step toward rebuilding trust
• Common misunderstandings men and women bring into the process
• Tips for doing disclosure remotely, safely, and with good aftercare
• A powerful final encouragement from Dan for both spouses on the healing path

Connect with Us:

🌐 www.watermarkcoach.com🎙️ Betrayal Recovery Transformation Podcast📸 Instagram: @watermarkcoaching🔍 Looking for a trained guide to walk you through disclosure? Visit Kintsugi Recovery Partners and explore the Find a Guide section for professionals trained in Dan and Dr. Janice Caudill’s disclosure process.

Sponsored by Pure Life Alliance

This week on The Betrayal Recovery Transformation Podcast, we’re joined by Amy Elysse—vocal coach, faith-filled encourager, and a radiant light in her community. Amy opens up about her own betrayal story and shares how the human voice, primarily through singing, can become a powerful tool for healing. Whether you’re musically inclined or simply longing to express yourself more fully, Amy brings warmth, insight, and practical wisdom to the conversation. And she's created a free recording to guide you through a healing exercise.

As a mom and coach, Amy helps women reclaim their voices and step into confidence through song and self-expression. She reminds us that healing doesn’t have to be heavy; it can be joyful, playful, and freeing.

Key Takeaways from the Episode:

• How Amy’s betrayal story shaped her understanding of healing
• Why the voice is such a powerful vehicle for recovery
• Parallels between singing and the process of emotional healing
• What it really means to “find your voice” after betrayal
• Easy, fun ways to bring music and singing into your daily healing practices
• Encouragement for anyone on the journey of rebuilding

Connect with Amy: Follow Amy on Instagram at @tunedintograce

Connect with Us: Visit our website: Watermark Coach Follow us on Instagram: @WatermarkCoaching

Thank you for listening! Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review our podcast to stay updated on future episodes and help others find the hope and support they deserve.

Produced and edited by Kris Rocha & Cory Gonzalez.

Sponsored by Pure Life Alliance

Pornography addiction is one of the most misunderstood struggles in the church today, often shrouded in shame and secrecy. Sam Black, Director of Recovery Education at Covenant Eyes and author of The Healing Church: What Churches Get Wrong About Pornography and How to Fix It, joins us to share how real freedom comes through accountability, grace, and informed support. Drawing from his journalism background and over 70 interviews with pastors, counselors, and people in recovery, Sam offers practical wisdom for churches, couples, and individuals navigating the path to healing.

Key Takeaways:

1. How Covenant Eyes Works – Sam explains how the software uses screen accountability and ally relationships to help individuals break free from pornography.
2. What Makes Accountability Effective – Data shows accountability is most potent when allies are engaged, supportive, and focused on deeper heart change—not just behavior monitoring.
3. Support for Spouses—Sam offers compassionate advice for wives who hope software will cure them, emphasizing that while it's a helpful tool, healing requires a broader process of trust-building and recovery.
4. What Churches Get Wrong – Drawing from The Healing Church, Sam reveals common missteps ministry leaders make—like placing blame on spouses or assuming more sex will “fix” the problem—and how to shift toward grace-filled support.
5. The Power of Collaboration: Sam shares why he invited Dr. Sheri Keffer to author a chapter in his book, emphasizing the importance of including voices from the betrayal trauma community in the healing process.

Resources Mentioned:

• Covenant Eyes
• The Healing Church by Sam Black
• Allied: Fighting Porn with Accountability, Faith, and Friends – Free eBook

Connect with Sam Black:

• LinkedIn
• Read Sam’s Articles at Covenant Eyes

Connect with Us!

👉 Watermark Coaching

👉 Follow us on Instagram: @WatermarkCoaching

🌟 Thank you for listening! Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review The Betrayal Recovery Transformation Podcast. Your feedback helps us grow and ensures more people can find the hope and support they deserve.

This podcast is sponsored by and produced with the support of Pure Life Alliance.

Dr. Anthony Walker joins us to share how he helps men navigate the healing process after betrayal. He provides insights from Help Her Heal, a workbook by Carol Jergensen Sheets, and discusses how men can develop emotional attunement, overcome resistance, and strengthen their relationships.

Key Talking Points:

• What led Dr. Anthony Walker to Help Her Heal and how he incorporates its strategies in his coaching.
• The importance of emotional attunement in repairing relational trust and how men can develop this skill.
• Common misconceptions men have about betrayal trauma and how Help Her Heal addresses them.
• How men can work through shame and defensiveness to focus on healing both themselves and their relationships.
• The role of spiritual warfare in marriage and how couples can recognize and combat these challenges.
• Encouragement for men who are resistant to engaging in the healing process and practical steps to begin.

Resources Mentioned:

• Help Her Heal by Carol Jergensen Sheets – Amazon Link
• Learn more about Dr. Anthony Walker at www.coachanthonywalker.com
• Intensive Hope Coaching – www.intensivehope.com/pages/services/coaching.html

Connect with Us!

👉 Watermark Coaching

👉 Follow us on Instagram: @WatermarkCoaching

🌟 Thank you for listening! Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review The Betrayal Recovery Transformation Podcast. Your feedback helps us grow and ensures more people can find the hope and support they deserve.

This podcast is sponsored by and produced with the support of Pure Life Alliance.

In this episode, we welcome Hope Ray, a Licensed Professional Counselor who coined Betrayal Violence. Hope is a leader in the field of betrayal trauma, offering deep insights into the effects of secrecy, deception, and relational power imbalances. She is also the creator of Complex Partner Trauma magazine, available on Amazon, which provides resources and support for betrayed partners.

Throughout our conversation, we dive into Reality Collapse, the disorientation that betrayed partners experience, and explore how betrayal violence impacts healing and recovery. Hope shares her expertise on recognizing and navigating these complex emotional experiences, helping listeners regain clarity and reclaim their sense of reality.

Key Takeaways from the Episode:

🔹 Understanding Reality Collapse – Hope explains what Reality Collapse is, why it occurs, and how often a betrayed partner might experience it.

🔹 Identifying Reality Collapse – We discuss the key signs that indicate someone is experiencing a Reality Collapse and how it can distort their perception of past and present experiences.

🔹 Betrayal Violence and Its Effects – Hope unpacks how betrayal violence exacerbates trauma and why it’s essential to recognize its impact.

🔹 Endangerment in Betrayal Trauma – What does endangerment mean in the context of betrayal trauma? Hope explains how betrayed partners can assess and safeguard their emotional and physical well-being.

🔹 Processing Betrayal and Reality Collapse – Hope shares how Reality Collapse affects a betrayed partner's ability to process their experiences and the symptoms that indicate they may be struggling.

🔹 Steps Toward Healing and Reclaiming Reality – Practical strategies for those who have experienced Reality Collapse, including steps to rebuild trust in themselves and their perceptions.

Connect with Us:

👉 Website: hoperay.com

👉 Watermark Coaching

👉 Follow us on Instagram: @WatermarkCoaching

🌟 Thank you for listening! Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review The Betrayal Recovery Transformation Podcast. Your feedback helps us grow and ensures more people can find the hope and support they deserve.

This podcast is sponsored by and produced with the support of Pure Life Alliance.