Welcome to Betrayal Recovery Radio. I’m Dr. Jake Porter, and today, I’m thrilled to be joined by the authors of Building True Intimacy, a powerful book that lays out a roadmap for restoring relationships after betrayal. In this episode, we dive into the journey of moving from devastation to a thriving partnership, and how to develop the "Intimacy Pyramid" as a practical tool for healing. We’ll explore the essential role of honesty, vulnerability, and intentional connection in rebuilding trust and creating emotional safety. Whether you’re navigating betrayal yourself or simply looking for tools to deepen intimacy in your relationship, this conversation is full of hope, encouragement, and actionable insights you won’t want to miss.

Matthew and Joanna Raabsmith are clinicians, speakers, and authors of the book Building True Intimacy: Creating a Connection that Stands the Test of Time. They have over 20 years of combined experience in counseling, coaching, and guiding couples toward healing and transformation. Their mission is to help couples navigate the complexities of relational challenges, particularly in the aftermath of sexual addiction and betrayal trauma, fostering deep restoration and growth.

Matthew is a Professional Certified Coach (ICF) with a background in pastoral leadership, while Joanna is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, EMDR practitioner, and Certified Clinical Partner Specialist through APSATS. Both hold Master of Divinity degrees and have served together on multiple church leadership teams. Currently, they co-lead their private practice, The Raabsmith Team, where they specialize in helping couples rebuild connection, trust, and intimacy.

Dan Drake is a licensed clinician, and he is the Founder and Clinical Director of Banyan Therapy Group in Los Angeles, California. He is a Certified Sex Addiction Therapist Supervisor, a Certified Clinical Partner Specialist Supervisor, and a Certified Clinical Disclosure Guide Mentor. He is co-author of several books, including 5 books in the Full Disclosure Series, Building True Intimacy: Creating a Connection that Stands the Test of Time, Letters from a Sex Addict: My Life Exposed, Surviving the Holidays, Healthy Boundaries, and Rebuilding Your Foundation. Dan is a husband and a father to two amazing kids and two fur babies.

In his passion to help sex addicts, their partners, and families restore relational, mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual wholeness to their lives, Dan strives to provide a safe environment where his clients can grow and heal.

Links for Dan, Matthew and Joanna:

www.banyantherapy.com

www.raabsmithteam.com/free

Get their book!

Other Links:

http://apsats.org

http://apsats.org/podcast

https://drjakeporter.com

http://drjakeporter.com/breakingbarriers

This podcast is intended for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional mental health counseling, therapy, or medical advice. All views and opinions expressed by the hosts, guests, or participants are their own and do not necessarily represent the official views, policies, or positions of APSATS. APSATS does not endorse any specific treatments, interventions, or advice discussed in the podcast. Listeners should seek their own professional guidance for personal health concerns.

Welcome to Betrayal Recovery Radio. I’m Dr. Jake Porter, and today, I’m thrilled to be joined by the authors of Building True Intimacy, a powerful book that lays out a roadmap for restoring relationships after betrayal. In this episode, we dive into the journey of moving from devastation to a thriving partnership, and how to develop the "Intimacy Pyramid" as a practical tool for healing. We’ll explore the essential role of honesty, vulnerability, and intentional connection in rebuilding trust and creating emotional safety. Whether you’re navigating betrayal yourself or simply looking for tools to deepen intimacy in your relationship, this conversation is full of hope, encouragement, and actionable insights you won’t want to miss.

Matthew and Joanna Raabsmith are clinicians, speakers, and authors of the book Building True Intimacy: Creating a Connection that Stands the Test of Time. They have over 20 years of combined experience in counseling, coaching, and guiding couples toward healing and transformation. Their mission is to help couples navigate the complexities of relational challenges, particularly in the aftermath of sexual addiction and betrayal trauma, fostering deep restoration and growth.

Matthew is a Professional Certified Coach (ICF) with a background in pastoral leadership, while Joanna is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, EMDR practitioner, and Certified Clinical Partner Specialist through APSATS. Both hold Master of Divinity degrees and have served together on multiple church leadership teams. Currently, they co-lead their private practice, The Raabsmith Team, where they specialize in helping couples rebuild connection, trust, and intimacy.

Dan Drake is a licensed clinician, and he is the Founder and Clinical Director of Banyan Therapy Group in Los Angeles, California. He is a Certified Sex Addiction Therapist Supervisor, a Certified Clinical Partner Specialist Supervisor, and a Certified Clinical Disclosure Guide Mentor. He is co-author of several books, including 5 books in the Full Disclosure Series, Building True Intimacy: Creating a Connection that Stands the Test of Time, Letters from a Sex Addict: My Life Exposed, Surviving the Holidays, Healthy Boundaries, and Rebuilding Your Foundation.  Dan is a husband and a father to two amazing kids and two fur babies.

In his passion to help sex addicts, their partners, and families restore relational, mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual wholeness to their lives, Dan strives to provide a safe environment where his clients can grow and heal.  

Links for Dan, Matthew and Joanna:

www.banyantherapy.com

www.raabsmithteam.com/free

Get their book!

Other Links:

http://apsats.org

http://apsats.org/podcast

https://drjakeporter.com

http://drjakeporter.com/breakingbarriers

This podcast is intended for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional mental health counseling, therapy, or medical advice. All views and opinions expressed by the hosts, guests, or participants are their own and do not necessarily represent the official views, policies, or positions of APSATS. APSATS does not endorse any specific treatments, interventions, or advice discussed in the podcast. Listeners should seek their own professional guidance for personal health concerns.

No one wants to prepare for a storm or consider the necessary steps to get to safety. Yet most would say they have a fire escape plan in their home for such an emergency. Most couples solely rely on the betraying partner’s relapse plan to find stabilization and repair. In the interview with Lyschel Burket, she invites betrayed partners to consider a plan for themselves in the aftermath of a slip or relapse. A plan allows the betrayed partner to find personal strength apart from the betraying partner's strength in order to navigate the storm. 

Connect with Lyschel:

http://hoperedefined.org

https://www.facebook.com/hoperedefinedsupport/

https://www.facebook.com/HopeForWives/

Links:

http://apsats.org

http://apsats.org/podcast

http://drjakeporter.com/breakingbarriers

This podcast is intended for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional mental health counseling, therapy, or medical advice. All views and opinions expressed by the hosts, guests, or participants are their own and do not necessarily represent the official views, policies, or positions of APSATS. APSATS does not endorse any specific treatments, interventions, or advice discussed in the podcast. Listeners should seek their own professional guidance for personal health concerns.

In this conversation, Jake Porter and Alana Gordon delve into the complex topic of consent, particularly in the context of betrayal trauma and sexual addiction. They explore the foundational aspects of consent, its importance in healthy relationships, and the challenges faced by individuals in understanding and practicing it. The discussion emphasizes the need for clear communication, enthusiastic participation, and the right to withdraw consent at any time. They also highlight the necessity of starting from the basics when teaching consent, especially in the context of past experiences and societal messages that may undermine it. In this conversation, Alana and Jake explore the critical themes of body autonomy, consent, and the importance of boundaries in relationships. They discuss how societal messages can shape our understanding of consent and the necessity of teaching children about their rights to say yes or no. The dialogue emphasizes the role of emotional awareness in recovery from addiction and the significance of building trust through open communication. They also touch on the impact of modeling healthy relationships for future generations and provide insights into the upcoming APSATS conference, which aims to educate and empower individuals in their healing journeys.

Links:

http://apsats.org

http://apsats.org/podcast

http://drjakeporter.com/breakingbarriers

Adam Nisenson, known as the Betrayal Shrink, combines his extensive clinical skills with a deeply empathetic heart in his role as a Betrayal Trauma Coach. Licensed as a Marriage and Family Therapist and Certified Sex Addiction Therapist, Adam is dedicated to guiding men through the complex emotions and challenges of betrayal trauma. His methodology is deeply influenced by his intimate grasp of the trials faced by men confronting a partner’s infidelity. Leveraging his extensive clinical background and personal insights of being a betrayal partner himself, Adam creates a supportive and understanding environment, where clients are led through their journey of healing with compassion and wisdom.

Holding a degree from Pacifica Graduate Institute with a focus on Marriage and Family Therapy, Professional Clinical Counseling, and Depth Psychology, Adam has committed his career to addressing critical issues such as betrayal, infidelity, sex addiction, and the myriad life challenges that accompany them. With Adam, the journey is not just about recovery; it's about embarking on a path of profound personal growth and rediscovery.

Links:

http://apsats.org

http://drjakeporter.com/breakingbarriers

Find more on Adam:

[email protected]

https://betrayalshrink.com

https://www.instagram.com/betrayalshrink

This podcast is intended for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional mental health counseling, therapy, or medical advice. All views and opinions expressed by the hosts, guests, or participants are their own and do not necessarily represent the official views, policies, or positions of APSATS. APSATS does not endorse any specific treatments, interventions, or advice discussed in the podcast. Listeners should seek their own professional guidance for personal health concerns.

Healing a relationship that is impacting by addiction, adultery, and betrayal requires hope. Many couples find themselves feeling hopeless after discovery and struggle to imagining having hope again. Hope is an anchor that keeps us grounded in our values and reality. This empowering discussion will offer tools on how to cultivate hope and build strength amidst the recovery journey.

Andrea Rogers is a board certified life coach and a certified partner coach with APSATS. Andrea is the founder of Fully Alive Coaching, a practice that was birthed out of her own recovery journey from the impact of betrayal. In addition to coaching, Andrea is Brainspotting practitioner, podcast host of "Blow the Whistle", a writer, and a speaker.

She has dedicated her life to helping others "wake up" and experience all that life has to offer. Through her practice, Andrea helps people go on the journey from hurting, to healing, to wholeness. She works with men, women, and couples who desire to move from a life of fear and scarcity to courageous living and abundance.

Andrea has over twenty years of coaching experience and has spent the last ten years committed to helping those in the areas of problematic sexual behavior and betrayal trauma. When she is not coaching clients, Andrea is spending time with four of her favorite humans, also known as her children.

Fully Alive Coaching Facebook

Fully Alive Coaching Instagram

APSATS Website

Free Gift Download!

Get my new book!

Cat Etherington is the Director of Recovery for Naked Truth Project, an international ministry opening eyes and freeing lives from the damaging impacts of pornography and other problematic sexual behaviors. Cat is a certified professional life coach and integrative therapist, working with individuals and couples impacted by problematic sexual behavior and betrayal. The first ever European practitioner to be certified by the Association of Partners of Sex Addicts Trauma Specialists (APSATS) Cat now serves on their Board of Directors and delivers their clinical training and has become a vocal and passionate advocate for the experience of betrayed partners.

Find more about Cat here!

Apologies for the late upload here, there we some technical difficulties when uploading to Spotify!

In this episode of *Betrayal Recovery Radio*, Dr. Jake Porter hosts a discussion with Pam Blizzard and Steph Farnsworth, exploring the complex layers of relational abuse within the context of betrayal trauma. They define relational abuse as a covert, disempowering experience, highlighting how behaviors like gaslighting and manipulation compound the pain of betrayal, creating a "double abuse" effect. Together, they discuss the challenges betrayed partners face in reclaiming their sense of reality and autonomy, while also offering hope for healing through boundary-setting, group support, and personal empowerment. For betraying partners, the episode offers insights into developing empathy and understanding the importance of transparency. This episode is a resourceful guide for both partners navigating the path to relational healing.

In this episode of *Betrayal Recovery Radio*, Dr. Jake Porter hosts a discussion with Pam Blizzard and Steph Farnsworth, exploring the complex layers of relational abuse within the context of betrayal trauma. They define relational abuse as a covert, disempowering experience, highlighting how behaviors like gaslighting and manipulation compound the pain of betrayal, creating a "double abuse" effect. Together, they discuss the challenges betrayed partners face in reclaiming their sense of reality and autonomy, while also offering hope for healing through boundary-setting, group support, and personal empowerment. For betraying partners, the episode offers insights into developing empathy and understanding the importance of transparency. This episode is a resourceful guide for both partners navigating the path to relational healing.

http://apsats.org

http://drjakeporter.com

http://drjakeporter.com/breakingbarriers

http://recoveredpeace.com

http://recoveredpeace.com/about-steph

http://apsats.org

http://drjakeporter.com

https://www.therelational.com/staff/Aarti
http://instagram.com/discovery_to_recovery