Double binds are the classic punished if you do and punished if you don't situations. If you respond to your ex's nonsense, then you are compromising yourself and exposing yourself to further mistreatment.  If you do not respond, then there is the threat that they will use you unresponsiveness as evidence that you are a bad parent. If you call out the game, then you are labeled as high conflict. Almost every way you looks at it, it seems like you will be punished.

This episode discusses the Double Bind situation as a hallmark behavior of abusers...one they use to gain power and control and to wear the victim down into a state of submission or helplessness. 

This episode then moves into strategies to get out of the Double Bind, starting with the observation that if you are going to be punished no matter what you do, you might as well clearly define what you truly want and move toward that.