In this deeply personal episode, I open up about receiving my diagnosis of OCD, anxiety, and depression, and the emotions that came with finally having language for a battle I had been carrying silently. As a Christian, I have wrestled with the tension between suffering and faithfulness: what it means to love God, trust God, and still be hurting. This is not a testimony of having everything figured out; it is a testimony of finding Jesus faithful in the middle of pain. I share the harm of a Christianity that dismisses real suffering, the freedom of recognizing that mental battles are not proof of spiritual failure, and the hope of believing in healing without demanding that it happen in only one specific way. Faith does not always look like being unbothered. Sometimes faithfulness is choosing to cling to Christ while your mind and emotions are weary. We do not follow an unwounded Savior, and we do not have to hide our wounds to prove we belong to Him.

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