This episode was originally written for Mozart but he decided it was too emotional to perform.

Honestly, what DON'T we talk about this week? Baby Jesus finally blessed us with some piping hot TL drama and frankly we couldn't wait to baste in those juices, sweetheart.

We discuss Lana Del Rey's brave defense of an outmoded form of womanhood, and wonder if the REAL perpetrator in all of this is Beyonce.

Then, we react to RuPaul's-- uh, we mean Lady Gaga's new single with Ariankkka Grande, "Rain on Me"! (Spoiler alert: we let her breathe and are definitely open to marrying some bottoms for Chromatican citizenship!)

Lastly, being the investigative reporters that we are, we catch Doja Cat in the act of going live on Insta to state her side in the unprecedented case of The People vs Their Own Feeble Minds, then wonder if the disease of "stanning" even deserves a cure.

Enjoy, you sweet meat ass fanooks! Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC.