Why does a happy, cooperative twelve-year-old suddenly turn into a sullen, depressed thirteen-year-old? There are two powerful forces that account for some of the adolescent behaviour that drives you crazy as a parent. The first is linked to social pressures common at that age. But there is a second source of disruption. It’s related to hormonal changes that not only transform the physical body but also revolutionise how kids think. For some (not all) adolescents, human chemistry is in a state of imbalance for a few years, causing flightiness, agitation, outbursts, and even depression. This upheaval can motivate a boy or girl to do things that make absolutely no sense to the adults who are watching anxiously on the sidelines. This hormonal firestorm can destabilise their self-concept and create a sense of foreboding. Parents often despair during the irrationality of this period. Everything they have tried to teach their children seems to have misfired for a couple of years. Self-discipline, cleanliness, respect for authority, and common courtesy may give way to risk-taking and all-around goofiness. If that is where your child is today, there is good news – better days are coming! Your unpredictable teen can actually become a tower of strength and good judgement – if they don’t do something destructive before their hormones settle down once more. What should you do as a parent? First, don’t draw long-term conclusions based on a short-term season. Second, let them know you love them, be patient, and pray for peace of mind. ‘The peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds’ (Philippians 4:7 NKJV).

© 2024. Written by Bob and Debby Gass. Used by permission under licence from UCB International.