w/Jenni Tooley

Hi darlin! I am breaking out the chocolate ice cream as we speak!!! I know I said we’d do a livestream, but I gotta tell you just getting the “studio” set up for this one took it out of me, so I decided to record it instead. That way I wouldn’t have to add troubleshooting a livestream to my day:)This takes us to the value of acceptance and the beauty of the pivot.

Both can make life a lot easier and fun- and are of great use in stressful situations like The Holidays (place echo sound effect here).

Enjoy my first “not-so-live” stream since pandemic times. Me, my dog, my fish tanks, and a camera that almost didn’t survive the setup. If you’ve been wrestling with perfection or wondering how to stay sane (and maybe even joyful) through the holiday swirl, pull up a chair.

Inside this cozy chaos:

* The legend of the six-fingered cover goddess—and why I kept her that way.

* A few deep breaths, a little laughter, and some truth about good enough being sacred.

* A peek inside the Better Homes & Boundaries: Holiday Edition zine—including your official Permission Not to Engage permission slip.

* Real talk about energy, imperfection, and finding joy when the world says “more, more, more.”

This isn’t Martha Stewart. This is midlife, magic, and the moments no one posts about.So, grab your tea or cacao, take three breaths with me, and remember—you’re loved. Exactly as you are.

Now I must keep the dog from eating whatever it is I tossed on the floor when I cleared my desk to make room for the Studio:)Love you!Jenni

P.S. Don’t forget — preorders for the Better Homes & Boundaries 3-Zine Bundle are still open! Once we hit 10 orders, it all goes to print (and into your hands before Thanksgiving). Choose your own price — minimum $49 — and be part of this perfectly imperfect little experiment.

Not into the printed bundle but want a digital version? Become a Studio Member. Or if you’d like to share in the celebration, you can buy me an ice cream via venmo @jenni-tooley

Welcome back to The Cancer Chronicles, where nothing’s off-limits—not even poop talk (you knew it was coming).

This episode is part confessional, part comedy of errors, and part love letter to the human body.

Support the cast with a donation via Venmo @jenni-tooley or by becoming a subscriber!

In this episode, I share what it’s really like to go in for a post-cancer surveillance scan—physically, emotionally, and yes, gastrointestinally. From a surprise iodine flush to two emergency stops at Walmart, it’s a story about healing, humility, and how even our bowels have something to teach us about surrender.

You’ll also hear me unpack the difference between worry, anxiety, and concern—and why understanding those nuances has been one of the biggest lessons in my recovery. (Spoiler: the grown-up me expresses concern, the little girl me freaks out.)

We’ll end with a gentle nudge toward kindness—especially for the parts of you that are still healing, still tired, or still learning to trust that you’re okay.

Mentions & Moments:

* First clear CT scan (🎉 cancer-free and on surveillance!)

* The joy of clean Walmart bathrooms and anonymous humanity

* The weird comfort of the Walmart radio station

* Talking to my therapist about intestinal compassion

* What it means to let the “adult you” take the wheel when anxiety hits

Takeaway:Be kind—to your intestines, to your mind, and to the messy, miraculous body that’s still doing its best. Healing isn’t tidy. But it can still be holy (and even a little bit funny).

🎧 Listen wherever you get your podcasts, or visit JenniTooley.com for more.

Oh, the holidays. 🎄 That sparkly, sugar-dusted time of year that somehow manages to bring out the best (and the absolute craziest) in all of us.

In this episode I share a little behind-the-scenes peek at my own holiday history. I dip into how the evolution of my family traditions made me realize I needed to start doing things differently. Like, way differently.

We’ll talk about:💫 How my “perfect holidays” started falling apart 💫 What 12 years of Al-Anon taught me about the holiday season💫 The real reason I used to get sick every year around this time💫 And how all of this inspired my newest creation: Better Homes and Boundaries: Holiday Edition- a three-part zine series and live workshop where I share spiritual principles and the tools that have made my life alot more livable.

If the thought of juggling expectations, family drama, or just too many cookie exchanges already makes you tired… this episode is for you.

🪩 Mentioned in this episode:

* Better Homes and Boundaries: Holiday Edition — the first in my 3-part holiday zine series

* Better Homes and Boundaries: Holiday Edition LIVE — a 45-minute guided workshop to help you visualize, reset, and reclaim your holidays

💌 Find everything at jennitooley.com

Support the podcast by becoming a paid subscriber or donating via venmo @jenni-tooley

This week’s episode starts with church bells ringing outside my car window (because of course it does). I’m on my way to get a haircut, but first—I’ve got a few things to share with you.

We’re talking about the Lavender & Lore event I did last year while in the middle of radiation + chemo, and how I’m approaching it differently this year.

Here’s what we cover:

✨ Last year’s Lavender & Lore—showing up exhausted, hot, and halfway through treatment.✨ The unexpected blessings: a new dog park community, support I didn’t even know I needed, and lavender treats.✨ What I lost during cancer treatment (and what I’ve let stay lost).✨ Saying yes when opportunities knock twice.✨ Preparing for events when your bowels might have other plans (yep, we’re going there)(again). ✨ Why “My Healing Comes First” is still my north star.✨ Feeling into where I am now—cancer-free, clearer, and grateful.

This episode is less about selling books and more about showing up as I am. Because sometimes the real abundance comes in sideways—through community, connection, or someone offering to walk your dog.

💜 Come hang out in my world:

* JenniTooley.com → Your doorway to the Sanctuary (free) & the Studio (paid).

* Upcoming: my Better Homes & Boundaries Holiday Edition zine+workshop for unplanning the holidays and making them your own.

✨ If something in this episode resonated, I’d love to hear from you. Drop a comment on my site or just send me a little note.

*You can support the podcast as well as well as my livelihood by becoming a paid subscriber or making a donation via @jenni-tooley

If you’re new here—welcome! You can find more at JenniTooley.com, where the podcast, Substack, and zines all live. Right now, you can try a one-month free subscription to The Studio—come check it out! You can also support the cast via venmo: jenni-tooley.

If it helps you can sing it to the tune of George Michael’s “Let’s Talk About Sex”.

Hey friends, it’s me, Jenni. Yep—you read that title right. This week I’m diving straight into the glamorous, unpredictable, and oh-so-humbling world of post-cancer poop. (You’ve been warned!)

In this episode, I talk candidly about what life looks like after rectal cancer treatment, rectal resection, and ileostomy reversal. From prune juice and sourdough toast to Imodium and the hilariously bland “rectal resurgence diet,” I’m sharing the real deal about what’s happening in my body, my kitchen, and yes… my bathroom.

But this isn’t just about bowels. We also get into the deeper stuff like healing at your own pace, the sneaky ways stress shows up in the gut, recognizing trauma in the aftermath of treatment, and why giving my energy to healing (instead of outside pressures) is non-negotiable.

If you’ve ever wondered what recovery actually looks like day-to-day—or if you just want permission to laugh, sigh, or nod along while I overshare from the toilet—this one’s for you.

In this episode:

* My week of poop roulette: constipation, diarrhea, repeat

* The “rectal resurgence diet” (aka the blandest foods known to humankind)

* Why healing is a full-time job

* Recognizing the trauma of treatment (and what that does to the nervous system)

* Honoring energy, boundaries, and slow healing—on my own terms

Until next time—take three deep breaths, pet your pets, and may your bowels be kind to you.

Love ya lots! Jenni

Support the cast and get lots of other goodness at www.jennitooley.com or venmo a little love to @jenni-tooleyThis episode of Cancer Chronicles is about death. Stick with me. What I’ve discovered is that death isn’t just about the end of life. It shows up in transitions, endings, pivots, and the letting go we all have to do along the way.

I share about sitting in the hospital surrounded by both birth and death. How I walked the hall between the NICU and labor & delivery while patients near me were in hospice. How I was celebrating as much as I could that I was coming to the end of my journey with rectal cancer while my friends mourned the death of someone whose rectal cancer journey had also come to an end. I also reflect on the death of my film dream, the shifts cancer forced into every part of my life, and even how I’ve experienced “wanting to die” in the sense of wanting a life I was living to end.

What I’ve come to believe is that every ending is a doorway into something else. Each transition—whether it’s losing health, identity, plans, pets, or people—is a kind of death that eventually leads to a new life.

So, if you’re in the middle of one of those big transitions, know this: you are loved, always. You’re going to make it through. And while it may not feel good all the time, you can still find moments of joy, even peace, in the middle of it all.

Lotsa love, Jenni

Transcript and captions available and beautifully imperfect! Episodes I mentioned in this episode- all except the poop ones, there are too many to list:)

Note: There’s a 90% chance that all or part of this podcast was produced in my bathroom. Please keep me in toilet paper by becoming a paid subscriber or making a donation via venmo: @jenni-tooley or paypal/zelle: [email protected].

I’m still recovering from my ileostomy closure- my bowels are very opinionated about the whole thing. I’m glad to be alive and exhausted at the same time so I’m going to keep this short.

Here’s what I talk about in this episode.

* What it’s really like when your bowels have to relearn how to work after ileostomy closure surgery

* The second hospital stay hit harder than expected

* The daily drama of dripping mini-splits and dog diarrhea felt like mountains I had to climb

* Remembering that “fear” is just Future Events Appearing Real

* Getting my priorities straight: 1. wound healing, 2. Bowels working, 3. I’m not even close to #3 yet:)

* Tools I use to consistently bring myself back to the present moment

* The Cancer Chronicles Sanctuary project—soon to be simplified and made doable by a chick who has very little “do” in her

We close with sharing gratitude—because no matter how rough the day, I can still find three things to be thankful for. Here are my three for today:

* I’m grateful I could pay the vet bill.

* I’m grateful my dog only has colitis.

* And I’m grateful for the birds singing as I sit outside.

Please share your three in the comments!

And as always: I’m grateful you’re here. Until next time—love you lots!

Links & Love

* JenniTooley.com — find my Substack, writings, and ways to support (free or paid subscribers welcome!)

* Share this episode with someone who needs a reminder that recovery is messy, human, and worth it.

Stage 3AN1 rectal cancer—gone. Now I’m healing, dreaming, and building The Cancer Chronicles Sanctuary: a space for real, in-the-moment stories, self-care tips, and light for anyone facing a cancer diagnosis. Ways You Can Support:

* Cheer us on and help spread the love* Donate to the GoFundMe or via Venmo @Jenni-Tooley* Share this post* Become a free or paid subscriber at JenniTooley.com

Together, we can make cancer a little less sucky.Love ya!Jenni:

Nine days post-ileostomy takedown surgery, deep in the bowels of recovery, and yet another denial letter from Social Security Disability shows up in my mailbox.

This episode is part truth-telling, part vent, and 100% real-life cancer recovery. I recorded it outside in the dark—cats meowing, frogs singing- hoping my bowels didn’t pick that moment to reve up again.

Because yes, there's a lot of pooping over here

But this episode isn’t focused on that.

This one is about what it’s like to go through a full year of cancer treatment—chemo, radiation, surgery (times two)—and still be expected to prove to a broken system that you're "sick enough."

That your healing isn't linear.

That your mental health matters.

That your body needs time, and so does your nervous system.

And that you deserve to access the benefits you’ve already earned.

I talk about:

* How I finally got real on my disability forms (diarrhea and all)

* The toll this year has taken on my body, mind, and spirit

* PTSD, anxiety, and the invisible layers of healing

* Why I keep showing up for this process even though I want to unhook from it completely

* And how abundance and love—real abundance and love—exist beyond these systems

This is a gentle reminder (for me, and maybe for you too): Just because the system is broken doesn’t mean you are.

✨And if you’re in the middle of your own fight—whether it’s with paperwork, poop, or the weight of it all—you’re not alone.

I see you. I feel you.And I’m rooting for you.

With love and cat kisses,Jenni 💗

Www.jennitooley.com

Community keeps this space alive I’m committed to keeping The Cancer Chronicles and everything at Jenni Tooley Presents accessible and free of paywalls.

If this episode moved you, helped you, or made you feel less alone—please consider:

💸 Sending a tip or donation

* Venmo: @Jenni-Tooley

* Zelle: [email protected]

* PayPal: paypal.me/jennitooley

💖 Become a paid subscriberYour monthly support on Substack helps me keep creating, healing out loud, and offering this sanctuary to others.

We rise together. Thank you for helping me keep this space honest, raw, joyful—and truly supported.

Once again thank you to ChatGPT for making these show notes. I would not have been able to do this without that tool.

I’m tired so take a listen and know that you are loved.

Venmo: @jenni-tooley PayPal/zelle: [email protected]

Episode Summary:

Welcome back to The Cancer Chronicles. It’s Day Five post-surgery, and I’m still here in the hospital, riding the slow-motion rollercoaster of recovery. In this episode, I share the real, raw, and surprisingly hilarious journey of waiting for my body to… well… poop. (Spoiler: it’s a whole thing.)

We talk about NG tubes (hard pass), reverse ileostomies, passing leftover barium (yes, still), and how surviving doesn’t always mean thriving—but sometimes that’s okay. I reflect on the wisdom from a friend and veteran combat medic: “You will survive all the situations.” I walk you through how what he said is helping me find perspective, even in the weirdest, most uncomfortable moments.

Also: a life metaphor involving pomegranates. Yes, I said pomegranates. Blame the meds.

This episode is equal parts hospital-room confessional and late-night love letter to anyone who's in the thick of it—whether you're healing, helping someone who is, or just navigating the hard parts of being alive.

Wherever you are, however you’re doing: you’re not alone. And you are loved.

What You'll Hear:

* 🎯 Why I’m still in the hospital after ileostomy reversal

* 🥄 My journey from IVs to a fully loaded baked potato

* 💩 Poop talk (because that’s healing too!)

* 🧠 “You will survive all the situations” — and why that simple phrase shifted everything

* 💕 What love feels like when you're lying in a hospital bed

* 🌊 How I visualize love as an infinite river

* 🍷 Life as a pomegranate (yep—this makes total sense in context)

Mentioned in This Episode:

* The Barium Enema episode — listen if you dare. Or just… take my word for it.

* My friend Chris, a combat medic whose words snapped me back into perspective.

* My dad, who reminded me that sometimes intestines need a nap too.

Support + Connect:

💗 Find all things Jenni (podcast, zines, updates) at👉 www.jennitooley.com📣 Subscribe to The Cancer Chronicles Support Hub and be part of this living, breathing sanctuary.

Closing note:If you’re in a situation (or five), I hope this reminds you that you’re not broken. You’re not alone. You are surviving—and that, my love, is a damn beautiful thing.

💌 Until next time,Jenni