Welcome to the Women of Worth Podcast with Claire Fealy! Today is the final episode of our three part series that focuses on trauma.

In this final episode of our trauma series, we identify common myths that surround trauma. From who is affected by trauma to what trauma should look like, we are debunking 4 of the biggest myths and getting down to the truth. I am also sharing three things that you can start doing today to start on your healing journey.

This isn’t just my podcast. I would never be where I am today without you! So, settle in, grab a nice cup of tea and welcome to another episode of OUR podcast.

The 8 Signs [01:30]

• “We don’t just grow out of trauma- our issues are in our tissues.” [02:00]
• “Childhood trauma is normal childhood experiences that we internalize to mean something about us.”  [03:15]

Myths about Trauma [03:30]

• “Myth #1: Trauma is a life sentence. You are not your coping strategies. Trauma has the power to both destroy and to resurrect. Use your trauma as a vehicle to get to where you want to go.” [03:30}
• “My anxiety and my depression made me a good coach. I have turned my struggles into my strengths, and you can too.” [05:25]
• “Myth #2: We can only experience trauma after a life threatening event. Remember that trauma means wound. There’s no scale that measures somebody’s emotional and psychological pain.” [06:20]
• “Stop judging yourself and critizeing yourself. You will never criticize yourself into the happiest, healthiest version of yourself.” [07:30]
• “Myth #3: If you’re strong, you can make it through trauma by yourself. Asking for help can be really, really hard, but it can save your life. The best thing I ever did was ask for help.” [07:45]
• “Myth 4: Nothing good ever comes from a traumatic event. Experiencing growth after trauma is more common than PTSD. Thousands of studies have shown that 90% of trauma survivors eventually say that they have a renewed sense of life, empathic growth, and increased emotional maturity.” [09:47]

How to Overcome Your Trauma [12:30]

• “Be at peace in the present” [12:50]
• “Observe, don’t absorb. Everyone is on their own journey.” [13:00]
• “Life is happening for me, not to me.” [14:00]
• “Step #1: Move- move everyday for 30 minutes, preferably outside. When you’re moving, try to be present.” [15:00]
• “Step #2: Connection- we feel safest when we connect with others. It changes the chemicals in our bodies. You need support.” [17:00]
• “Step #3: Daily Grounding- Just like you do a daily task, look after your nervous system. This can be breathing, journaling, and meditation.” [18:10]

Q + A [22:30]

• “Why are we so in denial of trauma over years before we need to face it and heal?” [22:30]
• “How come some coping mechanisms in childhood are adaptive and maladaptive later?” [23:30]
• “Is grief trauma, and how do you overcome it?” [24:30]
• “Could my trauma be responsible for why I feel anxious in my job?” [27:25]

Welcome to the Women of Worth Podcast with Claire Fealy! Today is episode 2 of a three part series that focuses in on trauma.

In today's episode, we are looking into the 8 Signs of Trauma. Trauma can look different for each and every person depending on their life-this is not a check list! This is an opportunity for you to look inward and stop asking “What is wrong with me?” and start asking “What happened?”. It’s time to turn your wounds into wisdom and your pain into power.

This isn’t just my podcast. I would never be where I am today without you! So, settle in, grab a nice cup of tea and welcome to another episode of OUR podcast.

The 8 Signs [01:30]

• “Nobody goes through the games of life without some form of trauma.” [1:45]
• “The first sign of trauma is low self worth-this is especially true with childhood trauma. We don’t have a capacity for reasoning and logic, so we assume anything bad that happens is because of us.” [02:15]
• “The second sign is intense fear of failure. Any small mistake, flaw, or weakness makes you feel overwhelmed.” [03:30]
• “Unhealed trauma is like walking around with an open wound, trying to bandage it by numbing and distracting ourselves but it doesn’t work.” [4:00]
• “The fear of success is the third sign. It is associated with early abandonment. It’s a fear of judgement and rejection.” [4:45]
• “Number four is micromanaging. Planning everything to a tee, and having a need for control. If you go into panic when things don’t go as plan, it stems from helplessness. It can show up as hypervigilance.” [5:15]
• “Number five is an inability to celebrate change. Our wounds cause us to feel unworthy.” [6:30]
• “Number six is hurting yourself and others. Unhealed trauma causes you to isolate yourself, lose your temper, and react instead of respond.” [7:45]
• “Number seven is an inability to ask for help. The fear of judgement and rejection stopped me from reaching out and getting help. Just know that not asking for help is not a sign of strength.” [9:30]
• “The last sign is the inability to concentrate and be present. You overthink to avoid dealing with emotions. It pushes you to live in your head instead of feeling and healing.”[10:15]

You Are Not Broken [12:00]

• “Just know that when people are projecting their pain, it’s not about you. Don’t internalize it!” [13:00]
• “Observe, don’t absorb.” [13:40]
• “You are not broken, you are wounded.” [14:30]
• “Allow trauma to be your teacher. Suffering is school. Take the lessons.” [15:10]
• “Turn your wounds into wisdom and your pain into power.” [15:40]
• “It’s time to do the work. It’s time to feel safe in your body again.” [18:30]
• “Create a life that you don’t need to escape from.” [19:00]

Work with Claire:

https://www.clairefealy.com/master-your-mindset
https://www.clairefealy.com/mindsetmasteryminimind

Welcome to the Women of Worth Podcast with Claire Fealy! Today is episode 1 of a three part series that focuses in on trauma.

In today's episode, we take a deep dive into the truth about trauma. We are taking a magnifying glass to the different types of trauma, including childhood trauma. By the end of this podcast, you will know exactly what trauma is and be able to identify the eight signs of unhealed trauma. This isn’t just my podcast. I would never be where I am today without you! So, settle in, grab a nice cup of tea and welcome to the first episode of OUR podcast.

You are NOT your Trauma [02:50]

• “Diving into trama has been unbelievable, not just for my own healing, but in my coaching, I started to see profound transformations with clients.” [04:15]
• “Therapy focuses on the past, whereas coaching is future focused.” [05:30]
• “The third pillar of my coaching is consistent happiness, not happiness all of the time, because that's not realistic, but your default mode, making sure your day to day experience of life is a good one.” [06:05]
• “Information gives us hit of dopamine. It's a temporary relief. It makes us feel good. Transformation comes from implementation.” [07:00] 
• “Trauma originally was the Greek word for wound- and that's exactly what trauma is.” [7:45]
• “Stop asking, ‘what's wrong with me? Why am I like this? Why can't I be like somebody else?’ Because trauma is not what happened to you. It's how your body copes with that stress.”[11:20]
• “The more I understood, the more aware I was of what was going on inside of my mind, inside of my body, my nervous system, the more empowered I was.”[12:10]
• “We don't say people with broken bones have a broken bone disorder. If you have an emotional wound or a psychological wound, you do not have a disorder, you're simply hurt by what has happened.”[12:40]
• “This is what I mean by people saying nothing traumatic happened to me. It is not what happened to you- it is what is going on inside of your body. Some people will fall in their bone, won't break. Other people will have a tiny trip and their bone would break.” [15:10]
• “If your parents didn't learn how to respond to emotions during their own childhood, then it's not possible for them to pass that on to you.” [16:20]
• “Feelings are just feedback.” [17:30]
• “I am very, very careful about what I watch on social media, and even TV shows. I know what I'm putting into my body, not just food, but information, images, all of those things, has a profound effect on your wellbeing.” [20:40]
• “Trauma teaches you to close your heart and armor up healing teaches you to open your heart and boundary up.” [24:15]
• “Your issues are in your tissues. So when you don't process your emotions, your stress response, all of that, it becomes stored in your body.” [25:30]
• “In order for us to heal it, we have to feel it. When it’s stored in our body and we haven't processed it, we become so backed up with unprocessed trauma, that the smallest things can seem life-threatening.” [26:10]
• “In order to heal the psychological and emotional trauma, just like healing a bone, it takes time and it takes resting.” [27:50]
• “The last part of healing trauma is rebuilding your ability to trust other people.” [28:45]
• “The biggest thing about trauma is it leaves us feeling overwhelmed, and it also leaves us feeling isolated.” [32:50]
• “We can't change the past. We can't change what has happened. We can only change the meaning that we give it.” [34:50]

Book Recommendations:

• The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel Van der Kolk
• What Happened to you? By Bruce B. Perry

Work with Claire:

https://www.clairefealy.com/master-your-mindset
https://www.clairefealy.com/mindsetmasteryminimind

Welcome to the Women of Worth Podcast with Claire Fealy! I am so excited to have you join me today to talk about how to make 2022 the best year of your life.

This episode covers all of those lessons I wish I could’ve learned sooner. I share my top 5 things I learned in 2021, as well as share 5 steps to help you make 2022 the year of YOU! We dive into my personal goals for the year, my 2022 daily non-negotiables, and some inspiration for your vision boards.

But this isn’t just my podcast. I would never be where I am today without you! So, settle in, grab a nice cup of tea and welcome to OUR podcast.

Turning 2021 to The Best Year of my Life [03:20]

• “The biggest limiting belief we have is that we think that taking care of ourselves is selfish. It is not selfish- it is smart.” [03:30]
• “You can’t give to others what you’re not giving to yourself.” [03:40]
• “Making myself happy was the best decision I ever made.” [04:30]
• “Where you are is not who you are.” [06:40]
• “The only way I was able to turn my life around was by having compassion for myself.” [08:00]
• “I finally realized that I was not going to get better speaking to myself like that. I wasn’t going to get better by hating myself.” [9:50]
• “I overcame what other people thought of me. I prioritized being happy and healthy over being liked.” [13:00]
• “You won’t live your life to the fullest if you’re only focused on what others think.” [14:30]
• “Everything I did in 2021, I did scared.” [17:15]
• “If you overcome fear in 2022, it will truly be the year of YOU.” [18:10]
• “Goals are about growth, not about getting. Getting more will not make you happy.” [19:45]
• “Who do you need to become to reach your goal? Once you find “who”, the “how” to reach your goal will be so much easier.” [22:00]
• “Not caring about what others think is not the same as not caring about others.” [23:30]
• “Confidence and success comes from keeping small promises to yourself daily.” [25:00]
• “When you have inner success, that’s when you start to have outer success as well.” [26:10]
• “You are your own greatest healer.” [27:30]
• “Wake up worthy.” [29:55]
• “I stopped trying to prove my worth and just started living it.” [30:40]

Make 2022 The Year of YOU [33:00]

• “Write at least one page of all the things that went right in 2021 because you won’t ever attract more into your life if you don’t appreciate what you already have.” [33:15]
• “Plan 2022 from a place of whole-ness. Don’t plan it from a place of wanting more, plan it around enjoying the journey and enjoying 2022.” [34:00]
• “Get clear on what would need to happen for you to call 2022 an amazing year.” [34:50]
• “Start with a big goal and reverse engineer it. Then take the steps and stay consistent.” [37:45]
• “Get rid of bullsh*t beliefs. Your beliefs impact your behavior and stand in your way.” [38:50]
• “Daily habits: Your goals should be broken down into things you can do everyday to maintain your health and happiness.” [40:40]
• “Meditation, movement, mood: Make space for each of these every single day.” [42:00]

Claire’s 5 Daily Non-Negotiables for 2022 [45:10]

• 15 minutes of meditation 
• 30 minutes of movement
• Journal: on gratitudes, goals, things coming up
• 1 hour of Learning
• Prioritizing sleep

Book Recommendation:

• Untamed by Glennon Doyle
• The Courage to be Disliked by Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga

2022 Quotes:

• “I am worthy.”
• “It is better to have a short life doing what you love, than a long life doing what you hate.”
• “I am worth loving. I do not have to earn love. I am lovable because I exist.”

https://www.clairefealy.com/master-your-mindset
https://www.clairefealy.com/mindsetmasteryminimind

Welcome to the Women of Worth Podcast with Claire Fealy! Today we are building your core- and not at the gym! We are building your emotional core.

This episode is packed full of tips, recommended reads, and my best advice to harness the power of your emotions. Being able to master your emotions is life changing and learning to reconnect with them will lead you to a life of happiness and joy. Get out a notepad because you’ll want to jot down these notes on how to get out of your own way.

This isn’t just my podcast. I would never be where I am today without you! So, settle in, grab a nice cup of tea and welcome to the first episode of OUR podcast.

Unlearn the Inner Critic [01:15]

• “How do you think reaching your goal will make you feel? It’s not the goal you want, it’s the emotion.” [01:50]
• “A lot of inner chaos comes from internal emotions.” [2:20]
• “50% of people’s success comes down to their emotional intelligence- their EQ not their IQ.” [2:40]
• “We are born innately knowing that our emotions are important because our emotions help us get our needs met.” [4:15]
• “Emotions end. The feelings come up, it happens, and then it leaves again.” [6:00]
• “We don’t attach feelings to emotions like hunger. We just take action on it. Emotions like tired we attach to stories like, “work is so stressful”, “I can’t be bothered”, “I can’t believe it’s not Friday”, feeding the emotion instead of just getting more sleep the next night or taking a nap.” [7:45]
• “When we attach meaning to emotions, today’s emotions become a predictable tomorrow.” [8:40]
• “When we suppress our emotions, it lowers our confidence because it drowns out our wisdom.” [10:00]
• “Minimizing some emotions, minimizes ALL emotions.” [10:45]
• “I feel happiness and joy and love so much better than what I did before when I suppressed my emotions.” [11:00]
• “In coaching, I find it’s one emotion that hasn’t been recognized or responded to that causes the clients stress. It’s not the event on the outside or the meaning they’re attaching to it- it’s the struggle to get to the primary emotion.” [12:35]
• “Emotional mastery is about getting our emotions to serve us-it is regaining control of your life by building a strong and healthy emotional core.” [13:00]
• “Overwhelm can be helped with prioritizing what needs to be done and letting go of the rest. Once that happens, the feeling of overwhelm can pass through.” [15:10]
• “Your emotions are an internal compass and they’re always guiding you back to wellbeing.” [16:35]
• “What you focus on, you feel.”  [17:40]
• “Other people's emotions are their emotions.” [18:00]
• “It’s important to learn how to observe, not absorb. Other’s emotions are not your emotions to feel or process.” [19:40]
• “Check in with your body for the emotion and sensation- you can Google Wheel of Emotions to help you identify what you are feeling-not what your brain is telling you to feel.” [21:45]
• “The better you get at feeling your emotions in the present, the more that you will integrate the unresolved emotions of the past.” [23:10]

Steps to building your emotional core [23:15]

• “Step 1: Identify your emotions.” [23:50]
• “Step 2: Acknowledge and appreciate your emotions.” [24:30]
• “Step 3: Get curious.” [25:05]
• “Step 4: Take action.” [26:00]
• “Start a daily practice to check in with yourself and your emotions.” [27:00]

Books + Recommendations [28:20]

• The Body Keeps the Score Bessel van der Kolk [28:20]
• Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself Joe Dispenza [28:35]
• The Presence Process Michael Brown [29:05]
• Emotional Freedom Tapping(EFT) [29:30]

Welcome to the Women of Worth Podcast with Claire Fealy! Today we are diving into the inner critic and everything you need to know to stop letting it control your thoughts.

This episode is packed full of tips, recommended reads, and guidance for stopping self sabotage. I walk you through how to identify your inner critic so you can face it head on instead of ignoring it. We will also talk about powerful strategies that you can use to start overcoming your negative inner critic and becoming the best version of yourself.

But this isn’t just my podcast. I would never be where I am today without you! So, settle in, grab a nice cup of tea and welcome to the third episode of OUR podcast.

Unlearn the Inner Critic [01:10]

• “One of the biggest blocks to unconditional self worth is our inner critic.” [01:20]
• “It wasn’t until I switched out criticism with compassion that I really started to embody self worth.” [02:35]
• “We all struggle with the same things. We all share the same pain. We all want to avoid inner pain and move towards happiness.” [04:05]
• “We aren’t born with a really harsh critic- it’s a habit that’s been very hard wired and very powerful.” [05:25]
• “You can unlearn the bad habits and re-learn the good ones.” [06:00]
• “You don’t want to get ot the end of your life and think, “Crap, I spent my whole life criticizing myself, others, my life.’” [06:55]
• “Your inner critic is that negative, internal running commentary in your mind. It’s made up of all of the judgement(or perceived judgements) that you have internalized to be true.” [07:30]
• “It’s not what happens to us in life, it's the meaning we give to it.” [08:15]
• “Your inner critic is driven by fear and it’s rooted in shame, and worry.” [10:05]
• “When you see people acting out it’s coming from a place of unmet childhood needs. A huge part of that is where the inner critic became loud as a child.” [11:50]
• When your core beliefs are formed from age 0-7, your brain has limited emotional cognitive and reasoning skills. That’s why we call these limiting beliefs-they were formed when we had limited access to our brain.” [12:45]
• “Instead of changing the behavior, change the belief.” [13:30]
• “Negative self talk coming from the inner critic will never give you the life you want-it will keep you stuck.” [14:25]
• “Negative thoughts turn into facts if they’re unobserved.” [15:00]
• “We can’t ever get rid of our inner critic. When we ignore it, it intensifies.” [16:30]
• “Self doubt is actually self protection. Your inner critic tells you things because it believes you’re incapable of handling more psychological pain ”[17:05]
• “When you build up your self worth and resilience and you’re in control not the inner critic, you have so much more freedom and energy.” [18:15]
• “Your inner critic cares more about you belonging than it does about you having a big dream or passion.” [19:00]

Mental strength strategies [19:30]

• Awareness-you can’t change what you’re not aware of. [21:10]
• Meet your inner critic and reassure it that there is nothing to be scared of. [22:20]
• Self judgement is not helpful, choose self awareness. [23:00]
• Accept what’s in the moment and don’t attach meaning to it. [23:50]
• Inner child healing EFT or Feeling unlovable EFT [25:50]
• Catch it, Challenge it, and Change it [31:00]

Book Recommendations [32:00]

• Homecoming John Bradshaw
• Radical Acceptance Tara Brach
• The Judgement Detox Gabrielle Bernstein

Welcome to the Women of Worth Podcast with Claire Fealy! I am so excited to talk about one of the topics that truly changed my life- Self worth.

This episode walks you through the step by step process on how to build a foundation of self worth. I share answers to frequently asked questions, my favorite book recommendations, and practical strategies that you can start implementing TODAY so you can start to build unconditional self worth. Transformation doesn’t come from information, it comes from implementation.

But this isn’t just my podcast. I would never be where I am today without you! So, settle in, grab a nice cup of tea and welcome to the first episode of OUR podcast.

Forming a Foundation of Self Worth [01:30]

• “Self worth is different from self esteem. Self worth is the idea that we deserve to be alive, be loved and deserve great things.’” [02:20]
• “Confirmation bias is your brain saying, ‘I knew this was going to happen, I knew he would do that, I knew she would do that, I confirmed my belief, I am happy out.’” [03:50]
• “It doesn’t matter what you have on the outside that either confirms your self worth or rejects it, if you cant determine your own unconditional self worth you will spend your life in survival mode.” [05:00]
• “Then we fall to the coping strategies that very temporarily take away the noise of not being good enough- but because they don’t give us what we actually need, they reinforce that ‘What’s wrong with me?’ feeling.” [6:30]
• “It doesn’t matter what we want in life if we don’t believe we are worthy of having it we either won’t attempt to go for it or when we get it we can’t let ourselves enjoy it.”[8:10]
• “Why am I so unhappy? I have everything I ever wanted.” [8:50]
• “Separate your self worth from the outside. You are worthy because you are born.” [9:35]
• “I am worthy because I am here. I am not worthy because of how much I get done. I am not worthy because of my relationship status. I am not worthy because of how many followers I have or how many likes I get.” [11:20]
• “It’s never too late, or too early, to develop that unconditional self worth.” [12:20] 

Strategies for Self Worth Transformation [12:30]

• “Step 1 is awareness. You can’t change what you’re not aware of.”  [12:45]
• “The only way you can start using your brain so it works for you, not against you, is awareness.” [13:20]
• “I want you for 1 minute, before you brush your teeth, to do self awareness. You are noticing, observing, and not judging. Be the observer.” [16:50]
• “Another thing that helps with self awareness is journaling. Just having a blank page and doing a brain dump.” [17:55]
• “Another thing that helps with self awareness is talking to others.” [18:05]
• “Catch criticism and turn it into compassion.” [18:50]
• “Nobody’s life is made better by you being hard on yourself.” [19:50]
• “Mirror Work: Looking yourself in the eye and giving yourself the approval, validation, attention and affection that you’re constantly looking for inside of yourself.”  [21:25]
• “Women of worth know that the only person that can define their self worth is themselves.” [25:00]
• “Set the bar so low that you can step over it. Gain confidence and build momentum so you can be successful.” [25:30]

Book Recommendations [25:50]

• The Mastery of Love Don Miguel Ruiz  [26:00]
• Heal Your Life Louise Hay [27:00]
• The Gifts of Imperfection Berne Brown [27:25]
• Radical Acceptance Tara Brach [27:45]
• A New Earth Eckhart Tolle [28:15]

Q + A [28:55]

• Best way to build up unconditional self love [29:00]
• Tips on Doubt [31:00]
• Switching from external validation to recognizing your self worth [33:30]

Welcome to the Women of Worth Podcast with Claire Fealy! I am so excited to have you join me today to kick off this amazing journey and dive into how I got to this place in life. 

This episode covers how I got out of my own way, stopped self sabotaging and finally gave myself permission to be happy and enjoy life. I also answer a few questions from my incredible listeners and clients, as well as share how my journey helped me to embrace that I am truly a woman of worth.

But this isn’t just my podcast. I would never be where I am today without you! So, settle in, grab a nice cup of tea and welcome to the first episode of OUR podcast.

Claire’s Story [02:20]

• “You are not your current circumstances. You are not your current beliefs. You are not your current thoughts about yourself.”
• “I was exhausted. I was overwhelmed. I thought to myself, ‘I can’t keep doing this.’” [02:35]
• “My gut and my intuition encouraged me to reach out to a life coach.” [04:15]
• “I started realizing that the outside wasn’t the problem- it was actually my thoughts. It was what I was saying to myself about work, being on the hamster wheel, feeling stressed, feeling exhausted.” [04:45]
• “What we focus on, we feel. I was focusing on all the things that weren’t going well and I was feeling like crap.” [05:05]
• “I had to stop relying on the approval of others to be happy.” [07:45]
• “Your low points are where you get the greatest lessons.” [08:30]
• “A lot of my courage and faith comes from knowing that my brother is always with me and always supporting me.” [10:00]
• “Be the girl that decided to go for it.” [12:20]
• “We can’t change our past, but we can change the meaning of our past.” [13:10]
• “If you don’t know your core values and priorities, you’re living by other’s values and priorities.” [14:50]
• “We see people going after their dreams and goals, and we think it’s because they don’t have fear and are so confident, but we all have fear-it’s primal. The difference is that they control their fear, their fear doesn’t control them.” [17:00]
• “Whatever your circumstances are today, they are just a reflection of the choices you’ve made.” [22:15]
• “Life is not up and down because you’re weak or not doing life right, it’s because that’s the journey we’re meant to go on. We’re meant to have the low points so we can learn the lessons, get clear on what matters to us, and so we can appreciate the high points.” [24:25]
• “When you reconnect with your self-worth and get rid of limiting beliefs, it is the most rewarding feeling ever.” [26:00]
• “Outcomes and others won’t make you happy in the long run.” [28:50]
• “My greatest achievement in life is my relationship with myself. Genuinely loving myself, genuinely feeling content and happy in myself. I get to help others do that.” [29:50]

Get in touch with Claire!

• Instagram: @clairefealymindsetcoach
• Website: https://www.clairefealy.com
• Weekly Newsletter: https://adept-trailblazer-5441.ck.page/cfa79a741d