You Guys are No Fun

Welcome brethren, to another episode of the CCoG Podcast!  Get down on your knees, lube up your ear holes, and prepare yourselves for a long one!  This week we’re gonna talk about GameStop;  we’re gonna talk about Nintendo;  And praise be unto Jesus! For the good Lord has seen fit to bless us with the presence of an Angel!  Welcome, for the first time, to our good friend Brother Chris, a.k.a. Grand Masta C!

Okay, enough of the evangelical bullshit.  We invited Chris onto the show to tell us why he pre-ordered the Nintendo Switch (he had no idea what he was getting himself into).  Before we got to that, though, we naturally had to talk about ourselves – we’re incredibly vain. Also, our guest microphone sounds really bad, so in an attempt to make it sound better Rian made himself sound terrible and we sincerely apologize.

In our recap of the last 2 weeks, Charles tells us that he’s still playing Watchdogs 2.  It must be a hell of a game if it can hold that guy’s attention.  We get to hear all about Rian’s foray into the story driven blockbuster title, Just Cause 3, and how fun it is to attach shit to other shit.  He’ll also give his review of the not-so-recent film Suicide Squad and dazzle us with his extensive insider knowledge of the KKK.  Chester regales us with stories about doing acid in the late 90’s; streaming Conan Exiles on Twitch with his friends ShockyP of Playstation Insider and XLRBigSausage of Playstation Inside Her; and subscribing to the Humble Bundle monthly subscription.  Chester also tells us all about how his life got flipped, turned upside down, just trying to make some money off of this god damn podcast!

Chester here, and I’ve got something to say!  We’ve been doing this podcast for almost 4 years, and we’ve never even tried to turn a profit.  We’ve always done it for the lol’s – we fucking love this shit!

So, one day I was talking to myself and I said, “I wish I could get paid to do what I love”.  BOOM!  A Grand Genie appeared and said, “Now I say, I say – listen here, boy! You can!”  And then, poof he was gone – just like that.  A year later it dawned on me:  I should try to make this podcast turn a profit.  Shortly thereafter, I met Marc from PlaystationInsider.com and he gave me the tools I needed to get started.

Anyways, I’ve rambled on long enough.  I see that you’re interested in helping us out.  So, if you need some new shoes, or toilet paper, or a vibrator, or pretty much anything under the sun, just click right –>HERE<– and then buy whatever the fuck you want.  Seriously, anything you want.  Just do it in the next 24 hours.

Finally – the reason why we invited Chris onto the show in the first place – his pre-order of the Nintendo Switch.  Chris informs us as to why he’s already bought a console that hasn’t even been manufactured yet.  Also, he bought the new Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild, and he’s not even Zelda fan!.  (I still can’t wrap my head around any of this.)

After that, we’ll berate GameStop for their incredibly shady business model called The Circle of Life.  This program is the clearest possible evidence that GameStop doesn’t give a fuck about their customers or their employees!  While we’re on the subject of screwing people: their program hurts game developers, too!  They don’t make dick off of re-sales!  Stop giving them money.  Amazon is such a better company.  Everyone should shop at Amazon.

Grand Masta C’s music is found in numerous places around the internet (just google “Grand Masta C”).  I would recommend checking out his Reverb Nation site. Do yourself a favor and read the About the Artist section. It’s magical.

The post Casual Cowards 84 – GameStop: No, Seriously. Just Stop. appeared first on You Guys are No Fun.

Better switch to safe mode, folks, because Rian has Super Aids! I swear to god that guy is sick every other week. Maybe it has something to do with drinking 2.5 gallons of beer in one night? I don’t know, I’m not a scientist! Leave me alone! I mean, I’d be lying if I said that I’d never done that… Anyways, now that everyone is safe, we can get on with the show!

In this episode we find out that Chester is now living that Humble Bundle life and he shares his thoughts on the indy title Pony Island. Naturally this leads to a discussion about what to call a unicorn with dwarfism. Why wouldn’t it? We also learn all about the new Netflix Original series Travelers and the giant gaping holes in the show’s basic time travel premis.

Charles lets us know why he was pleasantly surprised by Watch Dogs 2 and not so pleasantly surprised by the genre bending musical La La Land.  Don’t ask me how, but this leads to a discussion about making Tim Robbins watch while Morgan Freeman bangs his wife, Susan Sarandon. Can these guys ever keep it on the rails? Do we want them to?

Finally, the boys discuss their expectations for the Nintendo Switch and things get ugly. If you’re a Nintendo fanboy then this episode is probably not for you. If you have a problem hearing the word “dick” then this episode is definitely not for you. And if you pre-ordered the Switch then you can fuck right off.  You are responsible for encouraging Nintendo’s shitty business tactics and we hate you.

Also in this episode: Charles teaches us fractions using frogs. Shia LaBeouf doesn’t give a fuck. Cabela’s The Deer Hunter: The Game. Rian plugs fake sponsors.

The post Casual Cowards 83 – Nintendo: Masters of the Bate and Switch appeared first on You Guys are No Fun.

It’s 2017 and to help usher in the new year we are bringing you the brand new Rocket League episode, with a brand new theme song, and a brand new Chester! (we had to replace the old one (he had a drinking problem))

Now, we know that you’re all still suffering from your own New Years celebration (it’s only been 2 weeks) but have no fear! Rian’s hangover tips are here! The boys also discuss their own New Years adventures (which leads to a fascinating discussion on hiring practices in the southern United States), as well as their predictions for the upcoming year (Charles has some big plans – get ready Scotland).

Things get serious when Charles gives his review of Rise of the Tomb Raider, Chester describes a very personal experience playing Titanfall 2, and the boys express their genuine lack of enthusiasm for the upcoming Nintendo Switch. Don’t worry though, because Rian will also teach us what “yiffing” is! The Casual Cowards are nothing if not educational.

Finally, our heroes will share their own reasons for loving (or hating) the instant classic Rocket League by Psyonix! They’ll also share with you their discoveries concerning the developer’s sordid past (these guys never give up), as well as a surprising twist: Rocket League is actually a remake of the instant flop Supersonic Acrobatic Rocket-Powered Battle-Cars! Now with more League! It’s the Leaguest one yet! More Leaguer than ever!

Also, in this episode: Rian and Chester suck together. Dirk is too drunk to fuck. Chester is so smooth! Charles doesn’t talk about Flipmode Squad. Online Gambling? Rian does ASMR.

The post Casual Cowards 82 – Rocket League – (Too Drunk to F***) appeared first on You Guys are No Fun.

2016 can eat a dick! This year’s bullshit had Rian and Chester so befuddled that they fucked up the intro to the year’s outro! Join them as they discuss the year’s biggest disappoointmints – as well as the year’s most impressive titles! Chester also gives his reviews of the indy title Headlander and the shit movie Assassin’s Creed. We find out which games topped Chester’s list for 2016 and why Pokemon Go! was Rian’s #1 pick of the year!

Also, we get off topic and other things happen.

Music:

DJ Cutman

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Music:

DJ Cutman

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Music:

DJ Cutman

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Music:

DJ Cutman

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Music:

DJ Cutman

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Music:

DJ Cutman

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