Young Heretics

When we first met Aeneas, he wished he could have died at Troy. Today, we find out why. By all accounts, the honorable thing to do would have been to go down with the burning citadel of his fathers. But this ain't your daddy's Iliad, and one thing we're learning is that honor and glory don't fetch quite the price they used to. If there's anyone who understands that it's Neoptolemus, AKA Pyrrhus, AKA Achilles' hellspawn, AKA the living wages of Greek decadence. It's not a pretty sight. Plus: what should we make of the Septuagint?

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Hey look, it's some Greeks! Bearing gifts! What could possibly go wrong?

Today the Trojans will find out the answer to that very question, which will take us (at last!) into the story of that freaking horse. In Virgil's masterful hands it becomes a parable of Greek rhetorical trickery, Odyssean danger, and above all Roman anxiety over just how we should feel about the Greeks. On the one hand, without them, there would be no Aeneid. On the other hand, they're...kinda sus. Plus: why you should read the Aeneid instead of letting Grok do it for you.

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Don't take money...don't take fame...just takes a primordial deity whose powers of creation and destruction supervised the origins of the world, who is now divebombing straight at Dido's heart. What could go wrong? This extremely twisted Valentine's Day special will bring us to the end of The Aeneid, Book 1, which ends in blood-pumping fashion with a moment of extreme sexual tension. In the midst of which, Aeneas will be asked to relive the time his home got obliterated by a ruthless army of bloodthirsty Greeks. Fun! (No actually, it's fun.) Plus: the Drake and Kendrick of the ancient world.

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Wail, O Tyre and...where now? Just where WAS Jonah going when he got re-routed via fish? The possibilities aren't limitless, exactly, but there sure are a lot of them including...just, like, the ocean itself? Nah, probalby not, but it's a fun thought and there are lots of others. It's one of those little Biblical mysteries that holds out all sorts of tantalizing possibilities. I can't tell you which one is definitely right, but I sure have a favorite. You asked, I answer: where is Tarshish?

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It's Aeneas and Dido: A Tale of Love and War. As we get into the first major episodes of Aeneas' journey, we embark upon an intricate composition of wheels within wheels--stories of carnage and battle interlocked with stories of desire, affection, and lust. From an explanation of ring composition via Harry Potter, to a Virgilian image that has changed poetry ever since, to a bonus segment on chiasmus and the clapper (you know, that thing you can use to turn your lights on and off) it's a jam-packed addition to our Aeneas series.

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Beatrice Groves on Ring Composition in Harry Potter:

https://www.hogwartsprofessor.com/guest-post-stone-goblet-hallows-literary-links-and-riddles-in-philosophers-stone-goblet-of-fire-and-deathly-hallows-dr-groves-part-ii/

Who's that dime walking down the temple corridor? Is it Juno? Venus? Diana? Cleopatra? No, it's Dido, queen of Carthage and warrior princess of Tyre. In this episode, Virgil introduces one of literature's all-time greatest heroines, high on her throne but doomed to fall. She's demure...or is she? She's mother...or not? Whatever she is, she's always a woman to me. And to Aeneas, who at this point can't do much more than stare at her like a dope.

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When I tell you my finger smashed the "order now" button--apparently there's a fragmentary translation of the Aeneid by C.S. Lewis that he was working on all throughout his life. It's a rhyming version in 12-syllable Alexandrine lines, and you KNOW I had to do a review of it. Here are my thoughts, as well as a little more on Lewis's theory of epic and his lifelong relationship with Rome's greatest narrative poem.

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Check out a new review of the book at Law and Liberty: https://t.co/lHSo8yotG8

Of all the gin joints on all the shores of the Mediterranean, Aeneas had to wash up onto this one. He doesn't know it yet, but this is Carthage: the home of what will become Rome's greatest rival and the ultimate obstacle in her rise to greatness. The genius of Virgil is how he tells us all that while also showing us what things looked like from Aeneas' vantage point--before the clash of civilizations was made manifest, and when the immediate point at issue was where to get something to eat. Here's the key to understanding Virgil's opening moves.

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The End of Everything, by Victor Davis Hanson: https://a.co/d/iCDan7I

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If you've ever wanted to make the ladies or the fellas swoon with just three little words, now is your chance. I'm talking, of course, about the words "arma virumque cano." So few syllables, yet they say so much. In fact, they connect Virgil's epic to Rome and Greece, past and future, the Iliad and the Odyssey, the human and the divine realms, all at once. And each one is a kind of transformation of what went before it. Digging in deeper can help show the power of language and translation. It's time for another episode of words, words, words.

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A helpful list of translations: https://foundinantiquity.com/2023/12/05/do-we-have-too-many-english-translations-of-the-aeneid/#:~:text=In%20general%2C%20there%20is%20not,English%20translations%20of%20the%20Aeneid.

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Aeneas really, really does not want to be in this poem. As in, he would rather be dead. That's how the Aeneid starts out: when we're introduced to our hero he's a very unwilling participant in a grand plan for world history, and he doesn't feel remotely up to the task. Virgil might have felt the same way, crushed under the political and artistic pressure of telling a founding story for Rome's new era. Which makes this a perfect time to read the poem, as a troubled America gets ready to celebrate 250 years since its own founding.

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A helpful list of translations: https://foundinantiquity.com/2023/12/05/do-we-have-too-many-english-translations-of-the-aeneid/#:~:text=In%20general%2C%20there%20is%20not,English%20translations%20of%20the%20Aeneid.

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Mailbag: Check out Omeros, by Derek Walcott