By Ben Jarvis, Hunter Kelly, and Claymation Bates.Comedy
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episodes

  • Episode 29: Gandalf Said It!


    Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to get through this thing called life. Electric word life, it means forever and that’s a mighty long time, but I’m here to tell you there’s something else: You Talk Loud.

    • You want discipline? Drink water!
    • Van Allen, explain yourself
    • Bartender, one mind-eraser
    • “Oh my baybuh!”
    • TV time!
    • Bates knows his hosannas
    • Welcome to Shitty Church, with Reverend Pig-Pen
    • GTFO, Bickett
    • The Biblemaster
    • Oooooooooooh!
      • Links

      “Voyage of the Mimi”

      “Let Me Tell You ’bout Black Chicks”
      Metyrapone
      “Regular Show”

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    • Episode 28: Mean Old Man


      WWE and YTL present the greatest show in podcast entertainment! Featuring your TYL superstars: Ben “The Mean Old Man” Jarvis, Hunter “Sandwich Kid” Demyen, and Claymation “Capicola” Bates!

      • Curious wife beatin’ George
      • Sheriff Cordell
      • Father & son reunion
      • Meet Simon Birch
      • Cena’s biggest fan
      • Heisenberg
      • Wrestling internet super-fan
      • Put your shirts back on
      • The disappointment list
      • Sandwich kid: the return
      • Big travelin’ man
      • Fallout 3 zombie
      • DC game time!
      • Fatman thinspiration
        • Links

        Father & son

        Kevin Weismen
        Tank Abbott
        “Thinner”

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      • Episode 27: Capottica



        Oh yes it’s big boy’s night, and the pizza’s right! Oh yes it’s big boy’s night, the beer is out of sight!

        • The house that Kpop built
        • Breaking movie rules
        • Let’s Schwarzenate this night
        • “Teddy bear!”
        • I’m so excited
        • Ben’s cat book
        • I don’t think we fit in at Toys “R” Us
        • Cabella’s panda execution
        • “Spaceballs” merch wishlist
        • David Spade: ninja warrior
        • I think James Brown is gonna kill me
          • Links

          Fullscreen vs. Widescreen

          “Return to Oz”
          “Total Recall”
          “Demolition Man”
          “Brave New World”
          “Lock Up”
          “Showgirls”
          “I’m so excited”
          Guy Fieri
          David Spade

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        • Episode 26: Built-in Codpiece

          “America, I like my beats funky. I’m spunky. And yes, ladies and gentlemen, I like my oatmeal lumpy.” – President Obama, “The Humpty Speech.”

          • The cat’s meizzle
          • Martian “Big Brother”
          • I like it RAW
          • Ben don’t know diddly about bocce ball
          • My experimental summer
          • Athletic supporters
          • 7 humps
          • Dudical slang
          • Holy cock-munchers
          • Zeke, the hippie
          • You Talk Loud vs. The Big Help
            • Links

            Snoop Lion

            Cammy
            Mars One
            Space X
            Richard Branson
            WWE RAW 1000
            Bocce Ball
            Horseshoes
            “Nickelodeon Guts”
            Traditional Briefs
            Y-front briefs (as depicted by Hunter)
            The Chick-Fil-A controversy
            Blue law
            “What Would You Do?”
            “Double Dare”

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          • Episode 25: Skrambo


            The thrill of victory! The agony of defeat! Go for the comedy gold!

            • My lil’ rap cliq
            • Don’t get me started on the space baby
            • Crack the egg
            • You don’t wanna see Ben when he’s angry
            • Who keeps unplugging my stuff?
            • They call ’em “figgers”
            • Just buy the 8 ball
              • Links

              DJ Yoda

              Quasimoto (Pic)
              MC Paul Barman
              Turntablism
              2012 Summer Olympics opening ceremony
              Danny Boyle
              “Slumdog Millionaire”
              The National Health Service
              “The Dark Knight Rises”
              Burt Ward
              Magic 8 Ball

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            • Episode 24: Meet Ben Jetson


              Meet Ben Jetson! Hunter, his pal! His bud Batesy! Get me off this fucking thing!

              • No one likes Anders
              • Don’t drive while ass is poppin’
              • Raffi Insurance!
              • The best little whorehouse in Thailand
              • I’m a travelin’ Ben
              • That’s amazing!
              • Countdown to SmackDown
              • Comedy is not pretty!
              • Naysayers gonna naysay
                • Links

                Fake Ben

                Best of “Workaholics”
                “Yacht Rock”
                “Inbetweeners”
                Bobby Lee (Jay Mohr interview)
                Expo ’86
                Rick Steves
                Heull Howser
                The Daniel Tosh scandal
                The Adam Carolla scandal

                * The YTL crew would like to give a big fat “FUCK YOU” to James Holmes, the Aurora Massacre shooter. This fuck killed 13 of our kind and wounded many more. We hope he gets all that’s coming to him and that the victims and their families find peace. To make a donation to aid the victims visit the Aurora Victim Relief Fund.

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              • Episode 23: Don’t Wake Daddy


                Advance token to Cool Ass LA! If you pass “Uh-oh!”, spend $40 for two pregnancy tests. If Ben own’s Cool Ass LA, pay twice the rent! You better hope you don’t roll doubles…

                • Okay look… I’ve slept in a bandit’s bed
                • Bates is our landlord
                • Night terrors… what a fun game
                • This isn’t your mom and dad’s Comic-Con
                • Sci-Fi no one else likes
                • Sleepover stories
                  • Links

                  “Under the Boardwalk: The Monopoly Story”

                  Don’t Wake Daddy
                  Mr. Bucket
                  Candyland
                  Wahoo
                  The Settlers of Catan
                  Arkham Horror
                  Ben’s board game collection
                  The San Diego Comic-Con
                  “Oz the Great and Powerful”
                  “Return to Oz”
                  Fairuza Balk
                  Sam Raimi
                  “Hedwig and the Angry Inch”
                  “Frankenweenie”
                  “The Pirates! In an Adventure with Scientists”
                  “Wreck-It Ralph”
                  “Due Date”
                  “Tim and Eric’s Billion Dollar Movie”
                  “Star Trek: Enterprise”
                  “Sliders”
                  “My Secret Identity”
                  Los Angeles Comic Book and Science Fiction Convention
                  Jade East
                  John de Lancie
                  “Pet Sematary”

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                • Episode 22: Jellicle Cats


                  Please take your seats, the show’s about to begin. Sorry about the litter box smell.

                  • Jubilee’s joke
                  • The Phoenix Five: as easy as A-B-C
                  • Close my 8-bit chapter
                  • Early pizza retirement
                  • Whistle if you have no filter
                  • Ben Rogers’ neighborhood
                  • “Cats”: they will sit on your fucking lap!
                  • 2 stupid powerpuff labs
                  • Phineas and Ferb are perverts
                  • Dont flex your truck nuts
                    • Links

                    Cantopop

                    Daken
                    Itsu
                    Mariko Yashida
                    Lady Deathstrike
                    Marvel Pinball
                    Pinball FX
                    Taz-Mania
                    Skyrim
                    Maniac Mansion
                    X-Men Legends
                    Gauntlet
                    Shadow of the Colossus
                    God of War
                    Ico
                    Stupider (apparently it’s actually a word)
                    “Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats”
                    Boomerang
                    Eddie Deezen (The guy from “War Games”)
                    Midnight Madness
                    Phineas and Ferb
                    Eerie, Indiana
                    Twin Peaks
                    Quantum Leap

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                  • Episode 21: I’m Submissive


                    Let’s get the band back together and sing for a worthy cause! Randy Newman needs to be taken down a peg.

                    • Jack meets Julia
                    • Three jobless musketeers
                    • The X-Men need a day off
                    • “Shut up! I’m me!”
                    • Randy Newman: short people assassin
                    • So Colossus isn’t ultimately gay
                    • Kryptonian yuppies
                    • “Oooooh…You’re the complainer.”
                    • Dead people stories (feminine napkins included)
                    • The ’90s are back… in pog form
                    • The commemorative “A” dick gold coin
                      • Links

                      Julia Child

                      Jacques Pépin
                      Jubilee (She’s actually Chinese)
                      “Short People” by Randy Newman
                      “Superman: New Krypton”
                      Summerland Tour 2012
                      Seal Team 6 Commemorative Coin

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                    • Episode 20: The Purple Pie Man

                      Get in line! Take all you want, but eat all you take! Bus your plate!

                      • We’re going to Smackdown!
                      • Wrestling: I don’t know much, but I know who’s dead
                      • The Olympics… show your shit
                      • Dude Love… why is he above?
                      • Running from the Magic Kingdom
                      • Our pixelated fears
                        • Links

                        Smackdown

                        Luchador
                        Taka Michinoku
                        The Undertaker
                        Cactus Jack / Dude Love
                        Hulk Hogan
                        Sean Micheals
                        Captain Lou Albano
                        Big Boss Man
                        Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat
                        “The Macho Man” Randy Savage
                        Stone Cold Steve Austin
                        Doink
                        Six Flags Magic Mountain
                        Six Flags Fiesta Texas
                        Fantasyland
                        Huggy Bear’s hat
                        Purple Pie Man
                        Kung Fu
                        Paperboy
                        Silent Hill
                        Pro Wrestling
                        Ghostbusters: The Video Game
                        The Legend of Zelda
                        Left 4 Dead
                        Super Mario Brothers
                        Pac-Man
                        Sonic the Hedgehog
                        Fall Out: New Vegas
                        Doom 3
                        Home Alone
                        Mega Man X
                        Link
                        Ryu Hayabusa
                        The Prince

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