Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-266

This week on the podcast, I am talking all about the insidious nature of being raised a good girl. She's so polite. She's so agreeable. She is so likeable. She's such a team player and so dependable.

And we wonder why we are exhausted and resentful we don't have time for fun, friends or self-care.

Meet Sandi Konta. She's a coach for women who are ready to create a life that reflects their needs, without feeling guilty.

We met because we are both Fair Play Facilitators. I love learning about the how and why other facilitators come to the work of rebalancing domestic labor. Sandi is Done Being Good and I love what she's unpacking and unlearning.

Please listen to my conversation with Sandi and let me know what you think.

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-265

How was your week?

This week on the podcast I am sharing 10 Things Saving My Life Right Now. I love when Kendra from The Lazy Genius does these every few months, so you might also love hearing mine.

What's saving your life right now?

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-264

How was your April?

So glad I had the chance to sit down for an interview with a new pal where we talked about creating the lives we've always dreamed of, how we let go of what's ok when we deep down know something bigger and better aligned with our values is out there waiting for us.

Meet Tamara.

Tamara Wamsley is a transformational coach and founder of The Ambitious Chick Freedom Movement. She is on a mission to redefine success for ambitious women. After experiencing her own journey from burnout to breakthrough, she now guides women to break free from unfulfillment and create lives of purpose, financial freedom, and soulful alignment.

As a multi-faceted coach combining business strategy with soul-led transformation, she helps ambitious women discover their true calling and build thriving, purpose-driven businesses. Through her signature Freedom Roadmap, she's challenging outdated definitions of success and empowering women to create prosperity on their own terms.

Her approach uniquely blends practical business strategy with deep inner work, helping women not just achieve success, but create success that feels authentic and fulfilling. She believes that when ambitious women step into their power and align with their soul's mission, they don't just transform their own lives—they create ripples of change throughout their communities and the world.

Whether you're questioning the traditional path to success, feeling called to something bigger, or ready to turn your purpose into profit, today's episode will show you how to create freedom and fulfillment on your own terms.

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-263

So glad I had the chance to sit down for an interview with a new pal where we talked about creating the lives we've always dreamed of, how we let go of what's ok and trust that the thing we really want is out there and how to have difficult conversations gracefully.

Meet Jenny.

Genevieve "Jenny" Dreizen, Co-Founder and COO of Fresh Starts Registry, is an operations specialist, marketing professional, and modern-day etiquette expert.

On the heels of her sister Olivia's divorce in 2020, prompting Olivia to have an 'aha moment' when she realized we needed to reframe the narrative around big life changes, and her own decade-long relationship ending Olivia and Jenny founded Fresh Starts Registry, a first-of-its-kind platform built to support those going through brave and bold changes, such as divorce, job changes, coming out, living through grief, and more, by revolutionizing the art of starting again.

Jenny lives to remind people that we create the rules we live by all on our own and with our own happiness and joy at the center of it all, as illustrated through both her personal and professional endeavors. Her career has spanned multiple industries, informing her expertise across operations, business, marketing, and etiquette.

Jenny is passionate about creating usable, efficient, and beautiful systems to run Fresh Starts Registry to maintain their Experts, Support Specialists, and Freshies. She pulls in all of her knowledge from the various verticals where her expertise has flourished to enrich the experience of each person Fresh Starts touches.

Born and raised on Long Island, New York, Jenny now resides in Scotland with her husband, whom she eloped with in 2023.

When she isn't helping run Fresh Starts Registry, using her talents to write Simple Scripts to help people have hard conversations and set boundaries, hosting Jenny Says So where modern etiquette meets real life, co-hosting A Fresh Story, a podcast featuring raw, vulnerable, and honest conversations with guests about brave life decisions and fresh starts, or sharing her etiquette and gift-giving tips with major media outlets, she can be found enjoying the beautiful views of Scotland, taking a walk and picking up a sweet treat, or listening to her musician husband perform. She hopes to bring joy to others, make sure everyone feels seen in every aspect of their lives, and remind every person she supports that there are no rules to living a fulfilled life.

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-262

Approximately 20,075 days ago I was born. In case you don't have a calculator handy, that is double nickels AKA FIFTY-FREAKING-FIVE years old.

It feels completely bonkers because it doesn't feel like that much time has gone by. Everyone I have met recently is in the 38-48 year range and that got me thinking about how much my life has changed for the better since my late 30s.

At 39 I started blogging.

At 40 I started teaching yoga.

At 41 I became a mama.

At 42 learned about invisible labor, domestic load & inequity in marriage

At 43 I resigned from teaching school and dove into teaching restorative yoga

At 44 I was a caregiver to my mom post stroke and my preschooler.

At 45 I hosted several yoga retreats.

At 46 I went back to school for my Life + Work Coaching Certification.

At 47 I started speaking on stages about self-care

At 48 I got paid to speak on stage.

At 49 I started a podcast

At 50 We lived through a global pandemic

At 51 Grieved the loss of my best friend

At 52 I wrote and published a book.

At 53 I wrote a politics column for Jennifer magazine

At 54 campaigned hard for Kamala Harris.

Not surprisingly, self-care has played a huge role in that. This week on the podcast I am sharing Fifteen Things Every Woman Needs to Know About Life after 40.

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-261

My mom died 10 years ago today. We weren't close, but she was my biggest cheerleader. The older I get the more I understand who she was and how much of the time in history she was born into really shaped who she got to be.

My mom couldn't wear pants to her segregated school, got married at 20 and had her first child at 21. I came along right before she was 25. She was on the younger side of average at the time, but was relieved to be out of her parent's house.

In the early 1960s women then didn't have a lot of choices. Options for work were secretarial work, nurse, teacher or domestic labor. None were high paying. Women couldn't even get a checking account without a male co-signer until 1974.

I tell you all of this because my mom wanted my life to be different than hers. She wanted me to get my education, find a career of my own choice, be able to support myself, not have kids too early and to not get married unless it was a partnership.

She used to say, "Don't do what I did".

I used to joke with her that I wouldn't because her life in a lot of ways was truly awful.

As I've gotten older I have asked a lot more questions:

• Were the choices my mom made personal failings or choosing from a limited amount of crappy options?+
• If she'd been born in a different era would she have led a different life?
• Would she have waited to return to college after marriage and kids or would she have gone straight through like me?
• Would she have gotten married or even had kids?
• Would she have gotten divorced?

• Would she have gotten the mental health treatment she needed after having a traumatic childhood?

This week on the podcast I am sharing 10 Lessons I Learned From My Mom.

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-260

Are you waiting for someone to choose you?

Are you holding back because you think you aren't ready?

Are you waiting until you have enough experience or go back to school?

Are you worried you'll get it wrong?

I hear these fears all the time from women. They want to do something that makes a difference in the world and they get stuck because the little voice in their head telling stories about why now isn't the right time, they aren't the right person and they stay stuck in the loop of inaction.

This week on the podcast I am sharing a very special interview with someone who didn't wait to be picked - Liz Minella.

I first was introduced to Liz when she hosted the Women Wednesdays calls during the Harris campaign. I knew she was someone I could learn from so I started following her on Instagram. Needless to say I am a fan and wanted to know more about how she got her start.

So I asked her to be a guest on the podcast and it confirmed she has a lot to teach us about how to use what we have to move our values and issues forward today.

Liz Minnella is a mom, fundraiser and Instagram demfluencer. She gained an audience on Instagram following the Fourth of July shooting in Highland Park by posting short actionable steps for fellow activists to take to advance gun violence prevention legislation and she helped lead the grassroots push to pass the IL Assault Weapons Ban.

During the 2024 election cycle, she hit her stride organizing and activating everyday people to use their power and influence to make change. She founded Chicago Women for Harris and co-organized and MCd White Women: Answer the call, which broke Zoom with over 200,000 viewers.

She served as the Finance Co-chair of Women for Harris and raised tens of millions of dollars for the Harris campaign. She held weekly Women Wednesdays for Harris Zoom calls and organized door knocking trips across the battleground states.

Her work was featured in a front page article in the New York Times and on CNN in the days following the election. She recently founded Connect Forward an organization dedicated to funding and facilitating a new media ecosystem for liberal voices. She is also host of Demfluenced, a podcast focused on the intersection of social media and politics.

In other words, Liz didn't wait to be picked. She doesn't have any special training. She doesn't have a background in the field. She has an Instagram account and a passion for gun safety. In our interview she shared with me how she got her start and her plan to change how Democrats use social media to create change.

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-259

If I were in charge of how the world operates, I would definitely sleep as little as possible, stay horizontal in my soft pants, drink caffeine in the AM, and booze it up at night while eating BBQ potato chips and candy corn and feel FANTASTIC!

But alas, I am not in charge.

Instead we have to subscribe to human biology 101 or feel like a bucket of hot garbage or rusty buckets of bones. Or Boooooth. 😭

I regret to inform you no matter what is happening in the world, we have a lot of control over how we feel inside our bodies and in our lives in this utterly bonkers world.

What we do every day makes a difference in the moment and the long term.

Sleep the hours required? Calmer Move your body regularly? Calmer Meditate regularly? Calmer Eat regularly? Calmer

It sucks that it works.

And there is no getting around it.

This is what we practice in the CARE Club.

{Enroll today with code 2025EARLY to save $600. Payment plans are available.}

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-258

This week on the podcast I am doing a deep dive into Calming the Chaos Part 2: Friends Are More Important Than We Think.

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-257

Cops and vampires have permission to enter. Crazy too.

Someone recently said that since the plan is to overwhelm and exhaust us into giving up, we need to look at our own behavior in order to survive this administration.

The goal is to watch the rollercoaster without getting on the rollercoaster.

Watching a rollercoaster feels way different than riding a rollercoaster, doesn't it? This metaphor helps to capture the concept of equanimity really clearly.