100% Guilt-Free Self-Care

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-245

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-244

This week has been a lot. Sunday morning I found myself unexpectedly crying for three hours trying to figure out why I felt so overwhelmed even though everyone in my family was doing so much invisible work. Things I discovered included that I had extroverted way too hard, that all things on a to do list do not carry the same emotional weight and  my hate of 90+ degree weather was still very much felt. Monday couldn’t come soon enough.

Thankfully I was able to connect with a kindred spirit to talk all about fresh starts. I definitely needed one.  I love a do over more than most people because do overs are how I keep going in life.

Olivia Dreizen Howell and her sister Jenny started a divorce registry three years ago when they both were in the midst of life changing break ups. When I first heard this concept I couldn’t believe someone hadn’t thought of it before. It makes so much sense! We shower brides and babies with gifts marking a new life transition, but what about all of the other life transitions: divorce, death, graduation, job loss. 

In today’s world of marrying later and cohabitation before marriage it seems like a lot of people go from one toaster as a single person to two toasters as a couple to one toaster during cohabitation or marriage to NO toaster when you split up. I’m just saying that the time we need a new toaster is likely not at the beginning of a marriage, but rather at the end. 

I knew I had to interview the brains behind this brilliant idea and also the woman who started that national conversation around women having privacy in the voting booth. If you’ve spent any time online where people are talking about post it notes in the bathroom encouraging Republican women to cross party lines to vote for Kamala Harris because that you vote is public, but who you vote for is private then you’ve seen Olivia’s viral idea in the wild.

In this week’s episode I am sharing my conversation with Olivia about Fresh Starts, Voting Without Fear and how self-care is often the first thing to go when you are changing the world.

In case you haven’t yet met… Olivia Dreizen Howell is Co-Founder and CEO of Fresh Starts Registry, a clinical hypnotherapist, neuro linguistic practitioner, certified life coach, and single mom.

After her 2019 divorce, Olivia noticed that while society celebrates weddings and babies with registries, there’s little support for moments when people truly need to rebuild their lives, like divorce or job loss. This realization led her, alongside her sister Jenny Dreizen, to create Fresh Starts Registry, the first and only platform that helps people through life transitions by offering both expert guidance and essential home items. She is also the co-founder of the Vote Without Fear Platform, dedicated to empowering Americans to vote safely.

With a strong background in marketing and communications, Olivia has worked on global campaigns and TV shows, founded March Lion Media, and led social media efforts for brands, celebrities and TV shows. Since founding Fresh Starts, she co-hosts and produces A Fresh Story podcast and has written over 250 scripts to support people through life changes.

Olivia has been featured in Forbes, The Wall Street Journal, and more. She’s also the founder of YentaList, a job-posting site, and uses her platform to support single parents, empower women, and advocate for mental health and emotional resilience.

Please connect with Olivia online:

IG: https://www.instagram.com/freshstartsregistry/

IG: https://www.instagram.com/thedigitalyenta

FB: https://www.facebook.com/FreshStartsRegistry

Twitter: https://twitter.com/FreshStartsHere

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/fresh-starts-registry/

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-243

I have been thinking a lot about where we were 6 months ago. I had barely been diagnosed with ADHD, we were still in limbo with a bunch of stuff with my kid, and all I wanted for my birthday was my best friend to still be alive so we celebrate our birthdays together like we did pre pandemic - eating our way through West Coast cities with our pal Jeannie and laughing all weekend. March is one of my big grief months and this one hit particularly hard.

During that week I recorded a podcast called: My Birthday Wish for All of Us. In that episode I talked about all things I want that can’t be bought at the mall: quality and affordable child care, paid parental leave, hell just parental leave, universal preschool. Those little social safety nets, oh I really mean economic issues that are standard in other countries around the world.  (Go listen - you’ll be shocked how much maternity leave you get in Bulgaria).

It was in that episode that I referred to participatory democracy as a group project. And people still laugh/ groan every time I say it.

Many of us are still outraged by group projects. Maybe it is because you were stuck in a group with people you didn’t like or didn’t share interests with. Maybe it is because you were stuck in a group with people who didn’t care about the outcome and they didn’t do their part of the assignment. Maybe it is because you were stuck in a group with people who didn’t even understand the assignment and made zero effort to get it together for the good of the group.

And you were stuck doing all the work.

And everyone got the same grade.

In this week’s episode I am sharing a Pep Talk for Fall 2024.

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-242

This week’s guest is Jaime Davis. She is a Board Certified Specialist in Family Law, as well as a Certified Family Financial Mediator and Certified Parenting Coordinator. 

Her practice incorporates all areas of family law, including complex equitable distribution and child custody cases, child support, post-separation support, alimony, alienation of affection, and criminal conversation. She also handles family law contracts such as Premarital, Postnuptial, and Separation and Property Settlement Agreements.

Jaime is also an author and podcast host who aims to help people through divorce and preserve family relationships and finances.

Jaime invited me to be a guest on her show because she wanted to hear more about Fair Play. 

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-241

Happy back to school aka new year!

While I love the fresh start energy of a new school year, it also brings a deep feeling of anxiety. Will the teacher like my kid? Will the teacher be fair? Will the other kids include mine and be kind to her?

The second day of kindergarten was the first time I got a behavior call from school and I have spent every beginning of the school year since educating teachers and administrators about disabilities and disability rights within the public school system.

We have had to learn about special education laws and disability rights all while raising our little firecracker. Sometimes I feel like the universe had this kid in mind for me because what else would explain my past work as a lobbyist, a public school teacher AND a coach? These jobs gave me the skills to go to bat on her behalf. 

But not all families have the time, money, expertise or experience to help their students. 

This is lonely work for parents of kids who don’t fall into the school system because of learning and thinking differences. A lot of times we parents share similar  struggles as our kids.

Between me and my husband we have 36 years of direct classroom experience. AND THIS IS STILL A MYSTERY.

The education system needs help and no place is that more apparent than in special education. If your student needs an IEP or a 504, uses a wheelchair or other medical equipment or has ADHD you have to know a whole lot more stuff than parents who never deal with special education.

The craziest part of this is so much of special education is settled law. It should be this hard to access services legally required for students under settled law, right? Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA) guarantees students with disabilities free and appropriate education was passed in 1975 and updated in 2004. The Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA)  was enacted in 1990 - 34 years ago.

Why is this still such a struggle?

I recently asked my friends, neighbors and former teacher colleagues what they wished everyone knew about special education. They came through… everyone feels like every single part of the system is set up to fail.

I just discovered our school district has been under scrutiny since 2017 about their failure in special education. They have been involved in lawsuits and are just now trying to get it sorted. Needless to say I will be throwing in my two cents because this has been a shitshow.

People who aren’t directly involved have no idea how much extra work we are all putting in trying to sort out a complicated and confusing process. It is a privilege to not have to advocate for your student.

People who live this every day are exhausted and anxious because we all want the same thing for our kids: a quality education that will help them be lifelong learners. 

This isn’t the last you’ll be hearing from me about systemic changes in education, but I did want to share a resource I found.

Of course I immediately checked this out from the library, devoured the contents and then reached out to the author to be a guest on the podcast.

Meet Kelley Colman.

Kelley Coleman is a feature film development executive turned author and advocate for parent caregivers and individuals with disabilities. 

Her book Everything No One Tells You About Parenting a Disabled Child: Your Guide to the Essential Systems, Services, and Supports draws upon over a decade of experience, including her own experience parenting a child with multiple disabilities. 

Kelley lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two boys, and her son’s trusty service dog.

Who can you share this episode with? Does anyone you know know a student with thinking and learning differences like ADHD, autism, dyslexia or other learning difficulties? Do you know a family that has visible disabilities? Do you know a teacher, principal or school board member? Please pass it on.

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-240

This summer has certainly changed the culture and climate around women supporting women. I am seeing so many first time volunteers knocking doors, phone banking, text banking, putting up yard signs and having conversations with people about the upcoming election. 

It is absolutely thrilling to see. I love having all this new energy around uplifting women candidates and also women in general. Women are coming out of hiding and using their voices. It is a thing of beauty.

This evening I am going to a fundraiser in my neighborhood for Dr Flo - the first Black female candidate for mayor of Sacramento. I am committed to electing Democratic candidates - especially women - to all offices. I want progressive policies at all levels of government.  

This week in the 2024 Summer Podcast Series we are headed way into the archives back to episode #28 of the 100% Guilt-Free Self-Care podcast: Intentional Saving & Spending for Self-Care.

Putting money where our values are. 

You can find all the episodes and show notes at www.tamihackbarth.com/podcast

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-239

Have you been tuning in to the DNC this week? I am utterly stunned because we have never seen anything like this before. Politics is usually stuffy and boring. 

Not this year. The energy is absolutely electrifying! I am absolutely delighted with every speech. The roll call with a DJ and the playlist for every state? Perfection. Streaming the convention on YouTube and Tiktok equals no commentary to get in the way of the goodness. The Democrats inviting new media creators to cover the convention was absolutely brilliant because every day people are showing the convention from their perspective. A stroke of genius!

Tonight is the last night of the DNC and I  am left with one feeling: 

IT IS UP TO US.

When we show up we can make big changes happen. It’s up to us to get out the vote. It is up to us to show up with so many votes there is a clear mandate for progressive change. 🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊

What ways are you showing up for change?

This week in the 2024 Summer Podcast Series we are headed way into the archives back to episode #25 of the 100% Guilt-Free Self-Care podcast: My Secret to Getting Shit Done.

Our beliefs about what we think is possible plays a huge role in our outcomes. What would happen if you stopped doubting what is possible and started experimenting with the what if? 

🪄Magic can happen!🪄

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-238

Next week is the first week of school 🎊🎉🥳 and the Democratic National Convention 💙🫏🗳️. I am super excited for both!

I love the beginning of the school year for so many reasons: school supplies, a fresh start, structure to the schedule, learning new things, meeting new people. Let’s not forget I work at home as a super introvert and the return to school also ushers back in my daily uninterrupted work time.

The DNC is the official kick off for the 2024 election season. Crazy to think that all this other stuff we’ve been living through isn't official, but here we are. We now have our nominees - KAMALA and Coach Walz!!! It is time to talk to our friends, family and neighbors about their values and vision for the future. 

When we show up we can make big changes happen. It’s up to us. Have you been on any calls for Harris yet?

DID YOU HEAR DMDIY SUMMER SALES ENDS SOON?

Deferred Maintenance Support  is now enrolling! DMS  is a more affordable option that still includes monthly live calls (and lifetime access*)  you ask and you shall receive.

That’s right, you pay ONE TIME and have access to the calls forever*

We meet the first Thursday of the month - so now is the time to join us.

Pricing goes up in September. Join now.

This week in the 2024 Summer Podcast Series we are headed way into the archives back to episode #23 of the 100% Guilt-Free Self-Care podcast: My Weekend Self-Care.

I have a 3 part system that helps me be ready and refreshed Monday morning. It took a long time to figure it out, but I am so glad I did. I kissed the Sunday scaries goodbye for good.

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-237

This week in the 2024 Summer Podcast Series we are headed way into the archives back to episode #22 of the 100% Guilt-Free Self-Care podcast: My Non-Negotiable Morning Self-Care.

I absolutely love seeing behind the scenes of people’s lives. I wanna know about people’s habits, rituals, routines and what is in their purse.

If you are like me you can take a sneak peek at my morning routine. You can find all the episodes and show notes at www.tamihackbarth.com/podcast.

As always, if you like this show please tell a friend and/or leave a rating and review.

Show notes: https://www.tamihackbarth.com/blog/episode-236

This week in the 2024 Summer Podcast Series we are headed way into the archives back to episode #5 of the 100% Guilt-Free Self-Care podcast: Your Mental Health and Why It Matters.

Do you know about Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACES)? Everyone needs to because it can add years to your life.