As we grow in whatever family and wider culture we're born into, we inevitably find out that parts of us are not welcome. Most of us are pretty adept at exiling or hiding those parts away. But what if, instead of labelling them, judging them, and trying to keep them out of view, we learned to turn towards them as if they were bearers of gifts? And what if we could learn that we are indeed made up of many parts, and did what we could to welcome them all? Our 150th episode of Turning Towards Life is a conversation about the freedom that can be gained when we stop over-identifying with particular parts, and the step by step path to recovering our own wholeness that comes when we're willing to do the uncertain messy and loving work of welcoming exiled parts home - with Lizzie Winn and Justin Wise of Thirdspace.

This is Turning Towards Life, a weekly live 30 minute conversation hosted by Thirdspace in which Justin Wise and Lizzie Winn dive deep into big questions of human living. Find us on FaceBook to watch live and join in the lively conversation on this episode. We’re also on YouTube, and as a podcast on Apple, Google and Spotify. You can find videos of every episode, and more about the project on the Turning Towards Life website.

Our source for this week is written by Lizzie:

The Dark Bathing in Warmth Brings Light

Not so easily named but felt, just outside of my vision,
Who is this elusive and powerful part of life,
Calling my name and disappearing as I turn to see?

I know now that it has to feel safe to be in the light,
So I reassure and don’t look too directly on as she inches forward to talk.

When she talks there’s hardness and meanness there,
And in my safety I can hear her without mistaking her as the whole of me (how often have I done that?).

I hold her in my hands, in my heart,
Let her cry and rage and be mean. As long as she will let me.
And all the while I try to hold this as just a part, 
Just some of me, not all. 

And this way I can hold, I can be with, I can witness and most gladly I can learn and let the passion and purpose flow from this part to all of me with all it has to give. 

All these years she’s been banished and afraid, and now she comes to sit with us. Sits and says it like it is, and she has space.

Not all the space she sometimes wants, but space none the less.
Enough to be fully heard, learned from, embraces and treated as important and equal. 

May I always see this part with my heart and remember my faith in the times of fear. She is here to love me too. She doesn’t have the power to take me over if I turn and look with loving eyes and an open and courageous heart. 

She is me, I am her. And I regain so much by turning into her darkness with my light shining faithful and bright, my warmth thick and soft.

by Lizzie Winn, August 2020

Photo by Joshua Sortinoon Unsplash