Pulling The Thread with Elise Loehnen

In her private therapy practice, renowned psychoanalyst Galit Atlas, PhD, has identified six archetypes that shape our intimate relationships as adults. She says that every adult carries one of these archetypes with them, and that usually we carry more than one. She’s named them: the frightened child, the melancholic child, the ashamed child, the invisible child, the guilty child (I identify big-time with this one), and the chosen child. Today, we talk through these archetypes as Galit brings us into the therapy room and shares some incredibly resonant stories from her work with her patients. After you listen, I also highly recommend reading her new book, Come Closer: Childhood Wounds, Adult Love, and the Secrets of Emotional Intimacy.

For the show notes, head to eliseloehnen.com.

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“The alchemy pathway brings back synchronicity, unity, harmony to all of these different parts of self,” says psychic medium Carissa Schumacher. Her book—The Alchemy Transmissions: A Pathway to Miracles—is out this week, and it’s a series of transmissions she channeled from Yeshua (Jesus)! Today, we’re talking about what else this pathway might offer us, how to navigate the new era that we’re in, how to become more consciously mature, and how to step more deeply into your own unique essence.

For the show notes (including a link to Carissa’s 92nd Street Y event on October 3, which you can stream), head to eliseloehnen.com.

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It’s just me today, sharing an update on my next surgery (I’m still doing well!), and reflecting on something that someone shared with me at a book event a few weeks ago. It got me thinking about how our gifts are emergent; they show up at different times in our lives, and in different ways. And sometimes, we’re being called to simply be present. I’m also starting to reflect back on the last seven-year cycle (more about why in the episode), and hope you’ll join me in thinking about who you were, too, in the fall of 2019.

To see the show notes and my newsletter, to register for upcoming events with me, and to join our growing community for more—head to eliseloehnen.com.

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“Feeling is really the core of consciousness,” says Antonio Damasio, MD, PhD. “And it's giving you information about what it is like to be alive, and how your life is going, and what you need to do about it.” Damasio is the director of the Brain and Creativity Institute at the University of Southern California and the author of several books including, his latest, Natural Intelligence & the Logic of Consciousness. Today, he shares his beautiful explanation of this kind of feeling, along with his reflections on spirituality and the sublime. 

For the show notes, head to eliseloehnen.com.

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In their brilliant new book—End Times Fascism: And the Fight for the Living World—Naomi Klein and Astra Taylor uncover the varied threads that have given birth to an apocalyptic, survivalist alliance of power that seems intent on…ending us. And they share an arguably more appealing, enjoyable path to breaking the doom loop and—rooted in what they call here-ness—figuring out a new way to live in our profound world, now. It’s such a treat to have them both on the podcast today!

For the show notes, head to eliseloehnen.com.

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Richard Christiansen is the founder of Flamingo Estate and a dear pal of mine. Today, we’re talking (in part) about the stories that led to his new book, Flamingo Estate Pleasure Principles. We get into: our love of witches, why Richard thinks we’re experiencing a crisis of beauty (and what he does about it), the concept of a victory garden, the unexpected provenance of things like the California naval orange, and his take on chasing pleasure.

For the show notes, head to eliseloehnen.com.

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“ It’s just incredibly hard to really resist these forces that are, you know, probably from evolution, that we adapt to our circumstances,” says psychologist Angela Duckworth, PhD. “But once you have that insight, then you realize that you do have to shape your circumstances before they shape you.” In her new book Situated, Duckworth (who wrote the #1 New York Times bestseller Grit) reveals the often hidden ways that situational elements affect us, and she maps out optimistic strategies for sometimes changing our environment and sometimes improving the situations in our lives. In our conversation, she also shares some funny and enlightening psychology findings that help explain why we can be so different across different settings, and why our expectations of ourselves are socially determined. And toward the end, she offers an alternative approach to effortfully pursuing our goals—which does not involve suffering, and which is actually more effective (go figure!).

For the show notes, head to eliseloehnen.com.

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This month’s solo episode is mostly about what I think will come of all the AI generation, the fabrication of viral moments, and the latest iteration of marketing that we’re starting to see through. And why I think where we’re headed is mostly good for us. I’m also answering questions about how I personally use AI, as well as why I chose to move from Substack to Beehiv, and some little quirky things I’m hosting that you can join. But first, I’ll share a quick (positive!) health update, and what I’ve learned from Dr. Lucy McBride about how we tend to fall into different patient archetypes.

For the show notes and more details about the events and such I mention, head to eliseloehnen.com.

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“ I think these resources are good because it gives you the language and the tools to do something that doesn’t necessarily feel right,” says Stephanie Wittels Wachs, author of Last Day. Steph also hosts a podcast by the same name and is the cofounder and CEO of Lemonada Media (the podcast network I’ve been with for the last year or so). I’m so grateful to Steph for sharing a more nuanced and compassionate perspective on addiction, and for creating a vital guide for living with addiction, for connecting with loved ones who have this disease, for saving more lives—and for evolving our culture more broadly, which is so needed. Also for the warmth and humor with which Steph does this all!

I’ve covered addiction a lot on Pulling the Thread, so I’m compiling all the resources (including Steph’s book) in the show notes on my site: eliseloehnen.com.

Get 50% off Monarch, the all-in-one financial tool, at monarch.com with code THREAD.

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Chloe Redmond Warner is a very talented interior designer—and one of my closest childhood friends. To celebrate the launch of her special book This Must Be the Place, which is about how to design a home with personality, I got to interview Chloe at Godmothers bookstore. This episode is adapted from our live conversation, in which Chloe is her usual hilarious and brilliant self. She shares some of the fun house projects she’s done over the years, including one named Little Women on Acid. We talk about the value of aesthetic intelligence; Chloe’s process of making a house feel like a home; why she forced herself to finish her degree in architecture from Harvard’s Graduate School of Design; and her theory regarding the equalness of art, architecture, and decoration.

For the show notes, head to eliseloehnen.com.

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