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20.44: Now Go Write- How to Handle Relationships
We have an exciting announcement! Writing Excuses is publishing a book, Now Go Write, which will feature writing from all of our hosts! Sign up for our newsletter to learn when our book is coming out!
So, for our next few episodes, we’ll have each host share one of the topics that they have written a chapter about for the book. Today, we’re starting with Mary Robinette, who will be covering the question of how to handle relationships. We explore how relationships can act like characters themselves—shifting, growing, or breaking under story pressure. Mary Robinette also introduces the “Kowal Relationship Axes” as a way to build believable dynamics and conflict between characters. We hope you come away with practical tools to write relationships that feel real, messy, and full of momentum.
Homework: First, sign up for our newsletter to learn when our book is coming out!
Then: who does your character love because of their flaws and why? Write an exploration scene where the character is exhibiting those flaws and the other character is watching that fondly. Then, write a different scene where one character is mad at the other and the flaws are pissing them off.
ANNOUNCEMENTS:
Call for Writing Breakthroughs
Have you had a breakthrough in your writing because of Writing Excuses? If so, we want to hear about it. Fill out this Writing Breakthroughs Google Form for a chance to be featured in a WX Newsletter!
Last Annual Cruise
The final WXR cruise sets sail for Alaska in September 2026—don’t miss your chance to be part of it. Learn more and sign up here.
Credits: Your hosts for this episode were Mary Robinette Kowal, DongWon Song, and Erin Roberts. It was produced by Emma Reynolds, recorded by Marshall Carr, Jr., and mastered by Alex Jackson.
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* Check out Quince: https://quince.com/wx
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By Mary Robinette Kowal, DongWon Song, Erin Roberts, Dan Wells, and Howard Tayler
4.6
12811,281 ratings
We have an exciting announcement! Writing Excuses is publishing a book, Now Go Write, which will feature writing from all of our hosts! Sign up for our newsletter to learn when our book is coming out!
So, for our next few episodes, we’ll have each host share one of the topics that they have written a chapter about for the book. Today, we’re starting with Mary Robinette, who will be covering the question of how to handle relationships. We explore how relationships can act like characters themselves—shifting, growing, or breaking under story pressure. Mary Robinette also introduces the “Kowal Relationship Axes” as a way to build believable dynamics and conflict between characters. We hope you come away with practical tools to write relationships that feel real, messy, and full of momentum.
Homework: First, sign up for our newsletter to learn when our book is coming out!
Then: who does your character love because of their flaws and why? Write an exploration scene where the character is exhibiting those flaws and the other character is watching that fondly. Then, write a different scene where one character is mad at the other and the flaws are pissing them off.
ANNOUNCEMENTS:
Call for Writing Breakthroughs
Have you had a breakthrough in your writing because of Writing Excuses? If so, we want to hear about it. Fill out this Writing Breakthroughs Google Form for a chance to be featured in a WX Newsletter!
Last Annual Cruise
The final WXR cruise sets sail for Alaska in September 2026—don’t miss your chance to be part of it. Learn more and sign up here.
Credits: Your hosts for this episode were Mary Robinette Kowal, DongWon Song, and Erin Roberts. It was produced by Emma Reynolds, recorded by Marshall Carr, Jr., and mastered by Alex Jackson.
Join Our Writing Community!
Writing Retreats
Newsletter
Patreon
Threads
Bluesky
TikTok
YouTube
Our Sponsors:
* Check out Quince: https://quince.com/wx
Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/writing-excuses2130/donations
Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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