Money For Couples with Ramit Sethi

220. “I carry the baby, the bills, and the stress”


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Monica (36) and Michael (33) have been married just over a year and are navigating the pressures of new parenthood—but Monica feels like she’s doing it alone. She pays the rent, covers childcare, and works a demanding job, while Michael juggles three jobs and carries shame about his income and past financial mistakes—including an eviction he never told her about.

Despite a recent 50% salary increase, Michael didn’t share the news, reinforcing Monica’s sense that she’s carrying the emotional and financial load. Can Ramit help them rebuild trust, communicate transparently, and step into a true financial partnership?

In this episode we uncover:

• Michael’s quiet shame about earning less

• How an eviction early in their relationship shattered Monica’s trust

• The $95K salary increase Michael never told her about

• Why Michael’s “Swiss Army knife” mentality is sabotaging their relationship

• What Monica really means when she says she wants a financial partner

• Why transparency is still a major hurdle

• The emotional gap in their relationship, and how it’s showing up in everything from birthday celebrations to debt payoff plans

• What finally shifts when Michael shares his debt-free timeline

Chapters:

(00:00:00) “I feel like a leech”

(00:18:28) Ramit breaks down their numbers

(00:25:56) “I got a 50% raise…and didn’t tell her”

(00:33:24) Why she’s always the last to know about his money

(00:42:59) The secret that shattered her trust early on

(00:46:26) He paid off half his debt—but still struggles to celebrate it

(01:00:03) Torn between faith and financial goals

(01:04:38) When earning more still isn’t enough

(01:26:25) Are they finally rowing in the same direction?

(01:35:17) Where are they now? Monica and Michael’s follow-ups

This episode is brought to you by:

Fabric by Gerber Life | Join the thousands of parents who trust Fabric to protect their family. Apply today in just minutes at https://meetfabric.com/ramit.

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Netsuite | Download the free e-book 'Navigating Global Trade: Three Insights for Leaders' at https://netsuite.com/ramit

OpenPhone | Get 20% off your first 6 months at https://openphone.com/ramit

Links mentioned in this episode

• Get tickets for my next live events—September 14 in Atlanta and September 26 in Los Angeles—at iwt.com/events

Connect with Ramit

Get my new book, Money For Couples

Get Money Coaching with Ramit

Download the Conscious Spending Plan

Listen to my book—now on Audible

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Get my no-numbers journal

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If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here.

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Money For Couples with Ramit SethiBy Ramit Sethi

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