3 in 30 Takeaways for Moms

The holidays are upon us, and I don't know about you, but when my calendar starts filling up, time with my friends is usually the first thing I let slide. I tell myself I’ll reach out once this busy stretch is over, and then the next busy stretch comes along, and before I know it, months have gone by.

Our lives have become so efficient in this digital world. We can order dinner, get groceries, and even ask AI for advice without ever talking to a real person. Every convenience saves us a little time, but it also takes away chances to connect. And this really matters because connection is what gives meaning to our lives.

This week’s guest is Ashlee Gadd, founder of Coffee + Crumbs and author of You’re in Good Company.Ashlee shares three simple, doable ways to build in-person friendships, even if you’re busy, even if it feels awkward, and even if you’re not sure where to start.

In this episode, you'll hear:

💛 The simple trick Ashlee’s friends use before the check comes to ensure five busy, working moms in different cities can meet for dinner every mont

💛 Why Ashlee says every time we bring our emotional needs to a machine, we take away a real person’s chance to show up for us

💛 Why this year in-person friendships have become even more important to me

So here’s to sending the text, making the plan, and showing up in person this holiday season, even when the to-do list is long and time is short.

For full show notes, including takeaways, click here.

***

Announcements:

All November long, we’re celebrating the golden moments in our lives with our Fleck of the Week giveaway! Share a fleck of gold in your Instagram stories and tag @3in30podcast to be entered. Each week, one mom will win a free Flecks of Gold 3-Year Journal.

Related Episodes:

433: Making Friends as a Mom: Why It’s Hard—and How to Do It Anyway // Dr. Marisa G. Franco

How to Support a Friend during the Holidays who has Lost a Loved One // Rachel Gainer

020: How to Be a Friend Instead of Just Being Friendly // Brooke Romney

Episode Sponsors:

Tushy: 3 Million Butts Love TUSHY. Get 10% off TUSHY with the code 3IN30 at hellotushy.com/3IN30

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Freestyle: Get 30% off your first 3 months of a Freestyle diaper subscription at freestyle.world/3in30 with code 3in30. That’s a full month of premium diapers delivered to your door for just $49/month for your first 3 months.

Ethos: Protect your family with life insurance from Ethos. Get up to $3 million in coverage in as little as 10 minutes at ethos.com/3in30. Application times may vary. Rates may vary.

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There are seasons in motherhood when a well-intended reminder to “just focus on what you’re grateful for” makes you feel worse instead of better, because you’re exhausted, you’re not loving motherhood the way you thought you would, and the idea that gratitude will fix it all feels invalidating. I’ve been there more than once.

That’s a big part of why I loved this conversation with my friend Monica Packer. Monica and I are both raising neurodivergent kids who come with their own set of challenges, and we’ve each been in the throes of some really hard stages. And yet, a small, daily gratitude practice has been one of the things that helped carry us both through them. (And no, it didn’t solve all the problems, but it did help!)

This week, Monica, host of the About Progress podcast and founder of the More for Moms Conference, turned the tables and interviewed me for her conference, armed with her well-loved, slightly battered Flecks of Gold journal full of yellow Post-its marking the monthly tips inside it that have made the biggest difference for her. Together, we talked about what makes gratitude feel real, and how to keep the practice going in the busiest, messiest, most imperfect seasons, missed days and all.

In this episode, you’ll hear:

✨ The clever way one of my Self-Assured Motherhood moms captures her flecks in the moment

✨ What to do when your kids “never” get along or your teenager “always” has an attitude

✨ What it means when you can’t think of a single good moment from your day

As we head into a month full of gratitude prompts, I hope this conversation helps you see that gratitude, practiced in small and honest ways, is anything but trite, and that it can be one of the most powerful tools you have during your hardest seasons.

For full show notes, including takeaways, click here.

***

Announcements:

✨ Our Early Bird sale is here! From November 2 through November 9, everything in the Flecks of Gold shop is $5 off, no code needed, and every order comes with a free Flecks of Gold for Kids Download. It’s perfect for those of us who like to get our holiday shopping done early, whether you’re treating yourself or tucking one away for a mom you love. Shop at 3in30podcast.com/gold.

💛 Want more from Monica? Her entire More for Moms Conference is available as an Archive Pass, full of sessions designed to help moms feel more like themselves. Get it at aboutprogress.com/moreformoms and use code 3IN30 for $10 off.

Related Episodes:

401: How Radical Gratitude Can Change Your Life // Dr. Tanmeet Sethi

404: 3 Ways to Teach Children Gratitude

109: How to Find Gratitude in the Marathons of Life // Taffy Micheli

Episode Sponsors:

BetterHelp: 3 in 30 Takeaways for Moms is sponsored by BetterHelp. Go to betterhelp.com/3in30 to get 10% off your first month of online therapy.

Quince: Give the gift of quality this holiday season. Go to quince.com/3in30 for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns.

Freestyle: Get 30% off your first 3 months of a Freestyle diaper subscription at freestyle.world/3in30 with code 3in30. That’s a full month of premium diapers delivered to your door for just $49/month for your first 3 months.

Ethos: Protect your family with life insurance from Ethos. Get up to $3 million in coverage in as little as 10 minutes at ethos.com/3in30. Application times may vary. Rates may vary. Trustpilot rating as of 8/1/2026.

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***

For years, the most common advice I’ve heard (and given) to overwhelmed moms is some version of “do less,” and I still believe in it for so many of us. But some women hear that advice and feel a pang of loss, because the full, busy, people-filled life they’ve built is exactly the life they love, and they just wish they didn’t feel so stretched thin all the time.

Maybe that’s you, and you don’t want to give up the volunteering, the hosting, the garden, or the creative projects that make you feel most like yourself. That tension is real, and it deserves a better answer than “just cut something.”

This week’s guest is Stacey Mork Collins, certified life coach and my longtime Self-Assured Motherhood co-teacher.Stacey shares why overwhelm isn’t always a sign that something needs to go, and how getting curious about what’s underneath it can help you hold a big life with so much more ease.

In this episode, you’ll hear:

🌻 The one day a year Stacey cares what her kids wear (and why every other day they’re in stained hand-me-downs), because understanding what you value can turn a constant source of friction into a choice you feel good about

🌻 How Stacey pulled off a farm-to-table dinner for 100 people that raised over $10,000 for her kids’ school, and what her own family ate for dinner that week, because not every area of your life needs your best effort at the same time

🌻 The question Stacey asks every client who says “I don’t know,” because you often have more wisdom than you’re giving yourself credit for

So here’s to keeping the big, beautiful lives we’ve built, and to learning to hold them with a little more ease and a lot more self-trust.

For full show notes, including takeaways, click here.

***

Announcements:

Connect with Stacey Mork Collins, who coaches moms with so many good things in their lives who still can’t figure out why it all feels so hard.

Related Episodes:

446: Is Perfectionism Good or Bad? // Katherine Morgan Schafler

334: 3 Ways to Lighten the Load of Parenthood // Greg McKeown

435: How to Make Decisions Without Overthinking // Kendra Adachi of The Lazy Genius

Episode Sponsors:

Quince: Make your fall wardrobe feel easier. Go to Quince.com/3in30 for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too.

Ethos: Take 10 minutes to get covered today, with life insurance through Ethos. Get your free quote at Ethos.com/3in30. Application times may vary. Rates may vary.

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ind Your Magic in Motherhood: Free 3-Day Email Course

***

With the holidays coming up, many moms wish they could visit family or plan a getaway—but the price of flights makes it feel impossible. That’s why I’m re-airing this popular episode with Amber Paul from Amber on Points, who teaches families how to travel for free (or almost free) using credit card points.

Two years after recording this, I’ve now been practicing what Amber teaches—and it’s truly changed what’s possible for our family. I know it sounds too good to be true, (that’s exactly what I thought at first!), but it’s real—and it’s absolutely worth learning.

In this encore episode, you’ll hear:

✈️ Why opening multiple credit cards (responsibly!) can actually improve your credit score

✈️ How to use welcome offers strategically to earn far more points from the spending you already do

✈️ Why you might qualify for a business card even if you’re just side-gigging

A quick note: conversations about money and credit can bring up a lot of feelings. Wherever you are in your financial journey, this episode is meant to spark possibility—not pressure.

For full show notes, including takeaways, click ⁠here⁠.

***

Announcements: Grab the free companion guide (with Amber’s favorite starter cards) by clicking ⁠here⁠!

Related Episodes:⁠

369: How to Teach Your Kids about Money // Abby Chipman⁠⁠

430: Plan Meaningful Family Travel Without the Stress // Meggie Busath⁠⁠

507: A Fun Way to Get Involved in Your Family Finances // Amber Paul⁠

Episode Sponsors:

Quince: Make your fall wardrobe feel easier. Go to Quince.com/3in30 for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too.

Ethos: Take 10 minutes to get covered today, with life insurance through Ethos. Get your free quote at Ethos.com/3in30. Application times may vary. Rates may vary.

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Find Your Magic in Motherhood: ⁠Free 3-Day Email Course⁠

***

For a long time, I was happy to let our family’s finances be something I vaguely thought about. Like, I knew we weren't spending more than we made, but I couldn't have told you exactly how much we spent on groceries each month. It wasn’t until I started traveling on points that I had a reason to care where our money was going, and I’ve been surprised by how much more confident I feel now that I do.

This week’s guest is my friend and points travel mentor, Amber Paul, back on the podcast to talk about why it matters so much for moms to be involved in the family finances, and why starting with something fun, like your next family trip, works so much better than starting from a place of anxiety or "should."

In this episode, you’ll hear:

✈️ The memoir that made me so passionate about this topic (because it shows what can happen when women stay out of the finances for too long)✈️ How Amber’s family ended up bunny-sitting in Budapest (because a little creativity can stretch a travel budget further than you’d expect)

✈️ The app I open at night instead of Instagram (because tracking your spending is a lot more satisfying when it feels a little like a game)

If you’re like me and tend to zone out the moment money comes up, I think you’ll find this episode helpful and motivating. And if you’ve always been right on top of your family finances, I think you’ll find it a great springboard into the fun and freeing world of traveling on points.

For full show notes, including takeaways, click here.

***

Announcements: Ready to try traveling on points? Grab Amber’s free beginner’s guide at 3in30podcast.com/points for a recap of this episode and her current card recommendation

Related Episodes:

453: How to Travel for FREE with Your Family (Really!) // Amber Paul

369: How to Teach Your Kids about Money // Abby Chipman

203: 3 Ways to Change your Money Mindset Today // Sara Payne

Episode Sponsors:

Tushy: For a limited time, our listeners get 10% off their first bidet order when you go to hellotushy.com and use code 3in30 at checkout.

Quince: Make your fall wardrobe feel easier. Go to Quince.com/3in30 for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too.

Ethos: Take 10 minutes to get covered today, with life insurance through Ethos. Get your free quote at Ethos.com/3in30. Application times may vary. Rates may vary.

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Find Your Magic in Motherhood: Free 3-Day Email Course

***

Nine years ago this month, I recorded the very first episode of 3 in 30 in my closet, took a deep breath, and pushed publish. That night I celebrated with my husband and our two little kids, never imagining the people I'd get to learn from or the women I'd get to work alongside in the years ahead.

Every October I look back on that day with a little bit of awe and a lot of gratitude, and this year I wanted to celebrate the show's birthday in a way that felt especially meaningful to me, by handing the microphone to my team members Emily, Christy, Abby, and Steph, who are each sharing the 3 in 30 episode that has made the biggest difference in her life.

What moved me most about their conversation is that none of them expected their episode to be impactful. They came looking for help with their kids, or they almost skipped it altogether, and they walked away having learned something about themselves that shifted how they show up at home.

In this episode, you'll hear:

🎂 The praise strategy Christy says felt "a little bit like a con man" at first, and why she still relies on it

🎂 The permission Abby had been giving her kids for years but never gave herself

🎂 Why Steph dreaded editing the episode that ended up staying with her most.

If 3 in 30 has made a difference for you, the best birthday gift you could give me is to leave a review on Apple Podcasts telling me which episode stood out and why (I read every single one), and then share that episode with a friend. Thanks for nine years of listening!

For full show notes, including takeaways, click here.

***

Related Episodes:

026: How to Praise Your Child When It Feels Like There is Nothing to Praise // Tony Overbay

190: Becoming a Less Angry Mom // Natalie Hixson

401: How Radical Gratitude Can Change Your Life // Dr. Tanmeet Sethi

476: How to Deal with Your Stuff So Your Kids Don't Have To // Eli Harwood

Episode Sponsors:

Quince: Make your fall wardrobe feel easier. Go to Quince.com for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too. Please tell them we sent you!

Ethos: Take 10 minutes to get covered today, with life insurance through Ethos. Get your free quote at Ethos.com/3in30. Application times may vary. Rates may vary.

Let's Connect!

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Find Your Magic in Motherhood: Free 3-Day Email Course

***

The power struggles in our home used to be about car seats and leaving the park. Now they're about phones, sleepovers, and YouTube. But whether you're dealing with little kids you can pick up or teenagers who tower over you, the key to handling power struggles is usually the same.

When a power struggle starts, it's so tempting to dig in and prove who's in charge. But I've learned that the tighter I grip, the harder my kids pull, especially as they get older and need more room to grow.

This week's guest is Denaye Barahona, PhD, child development expert and founder of Simple Families.In this encore conversation, she shares a gentler way through power struggles, one where nobody has to win, and where we can hand over control little by little without losing our connection (and without backing down on the things that matter most!).

In this episode, you'll hear:

💜 The one question Denaye asks herself before she digs in because so many of our standoffs turn out to be about our preferences, not our principles

💜 The irony Denaye points out about kids' attention spans because we complain they can't focus while constantly interrupting what they're focused on

💜 The freezing, miserable family ski day that taught Denaye to change her mind, because sometimes the power struggle we most need to let go of is the one we're having with ourselves

So here's to loosening our grip a little, and to trusting that handing over power, bit by bit, is part of raising kids who can one day hold the power well.

For full show notes, including takeaways, click here.

***

Related Episodes:

211: Raising Independent Teens and Tweens // Amy and Margaret from What Fresh Hell Podcast

478: What Every Mom of a Teenager Needs to Hear // Emily Ricks

393: How to Enjoy (Not Just Endure) the Teen Years // Amie Anger, Child & Family Therapist, LCSW

Episode Sponsors:

BetterHelp: 3 in 30 Takeaways for Moms is sponsored by BetterHelp. Go to betterhelp.com/3in30 to get 10% off your first month of online therapy.

Quince: Make your fall wardrobe feel easier. Go to Quince.com for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too. Please tell them we sent you!

Ethos: Take 10 minutes to get covered today, with life insurance through Ethos. Get your free quote at Ethos.com/3in30. Application times may vary. Rates may vary.

Let's Connect!

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Find Your Magic in Motherhood: Free 3-Day Email Course

***

The first time my therapist asked me to picture "little Rachel" on the playground, glasses and all, and offer her the comfort she needed, I thought it sounded so woo-woo. I went along with it, but I was skeptical that imagining my younger self could change anything about how I feel today.

What I didn't know then is that there's real science behind exercises like that one. Our sense of worth is built on our memories, and researchers are finding that when we revisit those memories in the right way, we can actually change how they're stored in the brain.This week's guest is Dr. Marisa G. Franco, psychologist and author of Worth: The New Science of Self-Esteem and Secure Attachment.

She explains that even though low self-esteem can feel permanent, the truth is much more hopeful: self-worth is a skill, and there are simple, research-backed practices that can help you build it at any age.

In this episode, you'll learn:

🧠 Why love and success can actually feel threatening when your self-esteem is low (hint: they don't fit the story you've been telling yourself about who you are)

🧠 The ordinary childhood memory (involving soccer practice pickup) that shaped how Marisa felt every time someone ran late, and what shifted once she revisited it as her adult self

🧠 What Tetris has to do with softening painful memoriesIf you've spent years assuming that the way you feel about yourself is just who you are, I hope this conversation shows you that it can change, one memory and one moment of self-kindness at a time.

For full show notes, including takeaways, click here.

***

Related Episodes:

433: Making Friends as a Mom: Why It's Hard—and How to Do It Anyway // Dr. Marisa G. Franco

386: Raising Securely Attached Kids // Eli Harwood

245: You're Exactly Where You Need to Be // Alison Faulkner

Episode Sponsors:

Tushy: For a limited time, our listeners get 10% off their first bidet order when you go to hellotushy.com and use code 3in30 at checkout.

Quince: Make your summer wardrobe feel easier. Go to Quince.com/3in30 for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too.

Zenni: Go to zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for fifteen percent off your first order, plus free shipping on all US orders over sixty five dollars.

Rebel⁠: Brand names you actually want in home, baby, and outdoor at up to 70% off. Go to ⁠fromrebel.com⁠.

⁠Ethos⁠: Take 10 minutes to get covered today, with life insurance through Ethos. Get your free quote at ⁠Ethos.com/3in30⁠ Application times may vary. Rates may vary.

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***

When I interviewed Shawnee for this episode, I had to chuckle, because one of the things she listed as soul-care was volunteering for her kids' PTO. As an introvert, I think of the PTO as the classic example of something moms finally learn to say no to, so seeing it on her list of things that fill her up was the perfect reminder that there's no single right way to be a good mom.

That's the heart of the Self-Assured Motherhood Program. I'm not here to tell you what kind of mom to be. I'm here to help you figure out who you already are, what you need to thrive, and how to love your people in a way that's truly yours.This week's guest is Shawnee Burt, a SAM alum and mom of four who shares one takeaway from each of the three SAM pillars.

If you've ever felt guilty for loving the parts of motherhood that other moms skip, or for needing time that's just for you, this conversation will give you permission to stop apologizing and start enjoying the mom you are.

In this episode, you'll hear:

💜 The strengths night Shawnee threw for her friends, the "Bosom Beavers," after spending time digging into her own strengths, and why a few tears were shed

💜 The Alice in Wonderland party Shawnee spent weeks preparing for, and why she no longer feels guilty about it (even though her husband is convinced their house will never recover)

💜 The whiteboard calendar in Shawnee's hallway, and why Mom gets her own color on it

Whether you're a mom who goes all out for birthdays or one who'd rather keep things quiet and connected, I hope this episode reminds you that your strengths make you the best mom for your kids.

For full show notes, including takeaways, click here.

***

Announcements:

🌟 Enrollment for the Self-Assured Motherhood Program closes Tuesday, September 22, at midnight MT! This is the last year I'll teach SAM in its current format. Classes begin October 1st. I hope you'll join me! Enroll at selfassuredmotherhood.com.

Related Episodes:

502: 3 Principles that Carried Me Through a Really Difficult Summer

495: Celebrate Your Strengths // Back-to-School Check-In for Moms #2

436: Embrace the Mom You Are—Not the One You Think You Should Be // Julie Bastedo

Episode Sponsors:

BetterHelp: 3 in 30 Takeaways for Moms is sponsored by BetterHelp. Go to betterhelp.com/3in30 to get 10% off your first month of online therapy.

Quince: Make your summer wardrobe feel easier. Go to Quince.com/3in30 for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too.

Zenni: Go to zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for fifteen percent off your first order, plus free shipping on all US orders over sixty five dollars.

Rebel: Brand names you actually want in home, baby, and outdoor at up to 70% off. Go to fromrebel.com.

Ethos: Take 10 minutes to get covered today, with life insurance through Ethos. Get your free quote at Ethos.com/3in30 Application times may vary. Rates may vary.

Let's Connect!

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Find Your Magic in Motherhood: Free 3-Day Email Course

***

A few years ago, I did something in a moment of anger that I'm still a little embarrassed to talk about. It involved one of my kids, a Saturday chore list, and a TV that did not survive the afternoon.

You may never have broken anything, but I'd guess you know the feeling that comes next, that sick regret of realizing you just showed up as someone other than the mom you want to be. Maybe for you it looks like yelling, or shutting down, or disappearing into your phone when your kids need you. Whatever it looks like, those moments usually aren't random. They're often pointing straight at what matters most to you.

This bonus episode is the replay of my free class, How to Show Up More Like the Mom You Want to Be Every Day (Give or Take a Few!), where I teach Voice Your Values, the first principle in my Self-Assured Motherhood framework. Once you understand your values, your hardest parenting moments start to make sense, and that understanding makes it so much easier to forgive yourself, repair with your kids, and stay calmer next time.

In this episode, you'll learn:

💜 Why I broke a TV on a Saturday afternoon (and what it finally taught me about my triggers)

💜 A simple way to calm yourself in the moment when your kids push your buttons, so you can respond instead of react

💜 How to repair after you crash out in a way that helps your kids understand you, without excusing how you acted

Whether your kids are in diapers or driving, I hope this class helps you meet your hard moments, and yourself, with a lot more compassion.

⏳ Heads up: This replay is only available through Tuesday, September 22nd, and then we'll be taking it down.

✨ Enrollment for Self-Assured Motherhood (SAM) is open through Tuesday, September 22nd at midnight! This program will help you show up as the mom you want to be more often, in this season and every one after it. This is the final year I'll be teaching SAM in this format, and I would love to have you. Learn more and enroll at 3in30podcast.com/sam. Have questions? My team would love to help at [email protected].