30 Going On 13

In this episode we discuss our dire dental situation, Claire's rubber spiky earrings, teenagers with iced capps, purses and wallets made from garbage, Olivia's stance as Team Baruchel, Living Life with Derek, our love for the teenage Ashton Kutcher in Butterfly Effect, Ginger Spice's departure from Spice Girls, DDR, hip-hop pinky punches, fictional teenage boys repairing cars, Baton Rouge, "Chelsea" dogs, thigh-high converse shoes and a MAJOR announcement about January!!!

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In this episode we discuss Maddy's signature Comfy, straw-flirting at the movie theater, strings vs. band, Dewie from Malcom In the Middle, Chicken Soup for the Soul, the Scholastic Book Fair, Dan Ackroyd's beloved crystal skull vodka, JLC in a bikini, cult vibes, the unsettling amount of snow, dads making ice rinks, doing it "Grinch Style", hickory honey hams, roast chicken purses, rooting for burglars and SO VERY MUCH MORE!!!

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In this episode we discuss the One of a Kind, whether Bridget Jone's Diary is an x-mas flick, pro-life vs. pro-choice in the Santa debate, family bowl cuts, the othering of psychologists, step-parent revenge fantasies, dumpy x-mas songs, Honey They've Shrunk The Youth, the single dad section at Denny's, ciabatta buns, the turnover rate at the North Pole, Skydancers, chinstraps, Bernard's hair, Maypole aesthetic, ASMR for 90s nostalgia, weiny whistles for cucks and SO MUCH MORE!!!

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In this episode we discuss JTT's influence on Maddy's stage name, the game Cuck or Suck, briefcases vs. backpacks in university, Len, Olivia's stance as an Eddie Apologist, fantasies of tormenting a parent's new spouse, showing neither GUILT nor GRIEF, belted dresses from Big Dress, little baby buzzards, our love of Aqua, cows with bangs, the National Subway Disaster of 2020, Arby's, multi-Santa phobia, our Italian cousin C Peethrio, how men love to show up empty handed, the etiquette of asking a woman's sweater size and SO MUCH MORE!

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In this episode we discuss the rock n' roll agenda infringing on holiday music, the bourgeoisie class system on Crave, Friar Tuck vs. Friar John, whether or not kids have gotten smaller, corporate brand loyalty as a kid, the lack of mall culture in Canada, Olivia's favourite mall, scary xmas songs, MAM (Maddys Against Mushrooms), santa violence, "porking" Arnold's wife, inspector gadget shoehorns, Maddy's 14ft family xmas tree, skit apologists and SO MUCH MORE!!!

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In this episode we talk about the controversy surrounding last week's episode, the amount of dioramas in the 90s, #sheeple, our passion for 5-Star binders, Matrix themed novelty bars, the illegal modifications on Designated Dave's vehicle, Olivia's alleged story of MJH's Make-A-Wish style high school visit, Maddy threatening to fight her mom at the mall, cheerleading squads with BYOS (Bring Your Own Shirt) & BYOJS (Bring Your Own Jean Shorts) policies, professional hot air ballooners, alt swimming trunks, being anti-BNL, Bittersweet jewelry, Pandora charms, teen film incest and SO MUCH MORE!!!

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In this episode we talk about Maddy's shrunken gourds, A Bug's Life  on dvd, Olivia's alleged sleepover at the Skydome, quoting Dujour in the schoolyard, RLC's dumb dumb dumb hair, bandana headbands, platform shoes with bellbottoms, growing up as a corporate square, L&M vs. Alan M, public discmans at HMV, laminated eyebrows, the Orwellian nature of this film, the lacklustre makeover scene, alt-teens getting b-washed, Y2K=silver, pretending to be famous in Ubers, fry louffas, TRL, the Fake Blooper Toolbox AND SO MUCH MORE!

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In this episode we discuss being Barbara Bush-types, Olivia's PTSD from a childhood birthday party, propaganda from Big Girlfriend, our stance as non-partisan re:Cam Diaz, ultra low-cut pants, primary colours in the 2000's, sharp and sepia tone hair, Christians love of wakeboarding, "bajiggity", oversized Von Dutch chef's hats, American bikinis, texting while motorcycling, overdosing on wack, Maddy showcases her voice of an angel, red mouths from kissing, our hatred of fake bloopers and SO MUCH MORE!!!

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In this episode we discuss how much we don't care about graduations, Tom Cruise's middle tooth, clunching our pearls, Jennifer Love Hewitt's lacklustre lewk, our teenage revenge outfits, Olivia getting in trouble at work for wearing suspenders, how much we hate SSR aka Silk Shirt Ron, the mystery that is racketeering, bringing full blown cameras to the bar, FB albums for Wednesday nights and park hangs, lip sync vs. karaoke, terrorizing people with karaoke, Maddy sucking the life force from our young people and SO MUCH MORE!!! 

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In this episode we discuss the death of iconic children's movie music, dogs that are worth dying for (all), the ghost rules for dating my teenage daughter, Maddy's oral thrush (puke), Winona's stalagmite/stalagtite bangs, making headbands out of thongs, breaking the female class clown glass ceiling, Olivia's inexplicable attraction to Beetlejuice, whether or not the Houghs choreographed this movie, American Apparel dresses, making silly/zany kids' movies about pedophiles and whether or not Maddy will get her Amazon gourds in time for Christmas... AND MORE!

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