February 17, 2023

32. Healing Codependency, Toxic Monogamy, and Attachment Wounds with Polyamorous Professional Dominatrix Caitlyn Lune

1 hour 3 minutes

“You don’t learn how to not be codependent by avoiding intimate relationships. That’s not the antidote." - Caitlyn Lune. Codependency has little to do with being "dependent" vs. "independent" and much more to do with our attachment wounding and the subtle ways we may subconsciously seek control. Codependency can happen in any connection - friendships, lovers, and partners in any relational style. In today's episode, I speak with my long time best friend, Caitlyn Daly who has spent her life learning the art of eros and intimacy.

This is part 2 of a longer conversation, so if you want to listen to part 1 all about healthy committed friendships, you can hear our story about conflict, repair, the mother wound, and building trust in bonus premium episode 31 of this podcast.

We also discuss:

Navigating the space between monogamy and polyamory

Toxic vs healthy monogamy and sexual fidelity

How to discuss shared values in relationships

Ending the cycle of Codependency and giving up seeking to control or manipulate our partners via rigidity, fawning, and other strategies

Healing jealousy, victim mindset, abusive behavior and finding security in ourselves

Choosing your relational styles based on healing attachment wounding

Caitlyn is a professional dominatrix, performer, and sacred touch provider in Portland, Oregon. Coming of age in the wildest city in the world, NYC, parties, kink, and psychedelia became part of her lifestyle with a true north on personal growth and radical self-expression. In 2016, she began throwing parties for swingers and sex curious to have a safe place to explore. Combining her fascination for the erotic with deep emotional embodiment practices, she pursued training in tantric teachings. Caitlyn loves the home she shares with two partners and is connected to broader community through the pulse of the life force that ties us all together.

Caity's Website : heiresstoeros.com

Links:

Get bonus episodes on substack! ⁠⁠⁠https://depthwork.substack.com/⁠⁠⁠

Reclaiming All Parts of You: Healing Shame Workbook & Meditation : ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://witty-creator-9045.ck.page/e89cafda64⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Resources:

Codependent No More by Melody Beattie https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/61865476-codependent-no-more

Disclaimer: The DEPTH Work Podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Information on this podcast in no way to be construed or substituted as psychological counseling, psychotherapy, mental health counseling, or any other type of therapy or medical advice.

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