August 1

Nobody is forcing you to stay sober. You are not mandated to attend meetings or talk to others in recovery. This is a voluntary act. Now that you have some time sober, it is entirely your decision to stay active in recovery or just go about your life as all other people do. Take a look back at the time you have remained sober and in recovery. Is it worth it? Do you remember what it was like before you got sober? Nobody can honestly say that if you go back to drinking/drugging or just stop attending meetings, you will go back to how it was before. The question is, do you like the person you are revealing yourself to be today, or are you unhappy with yourself and your recovery? Are you unhappy enough to risk a relapse into who you were before, or maybe instead of that, perhaps you are unhappy enough to try something completely different? Maybe you need to risk going further rather than going back?

Reflections

Well? You chicken-shit-motherfucker, what’s it going to be?

Daily Challenge

If you are happy and you know it, clap those hands! On the other hand, if this reading struck a nerve, decide to go further today. Only you get to decide what “further” means.

July 31

After 24 hours, alcohol has left your system. You can’t get any soberer (is that even a word?) than that. You may feel the effects of detoxification for up to 1 week or more after alcohol is out of your system. Withdrawal symptoms begin within 8 hours after your last drink. Within 24 to 72 hours, the symptoms reach maximum misery. After 5 to 7 days, the symptoms lessen in intensity. Beyond 1 week, the psychological effects may continue for a lifetime if untreated. Associated with this timeline (depending on your level of consumption) is a list of symptoms that traverse 3 stages. Stage 1 includes nausea, insomnia, and stomach pain. Stage 2 involves high blood pressure, high temperature, abnormal heart rate, and confusion. Stage 3 gets even worse with fever, seizures, hallucinations, and observable agitation. The last stage can be dangerous and potentially life-threatening. Even if you have only been drinking for a short time (weeks) or for many years, detoxing at home alone is not advisable. Seek professional help if you plan on stopping drinking.

Reflections

How did you stop drinking?

Daily Challenge

Look up local detoxes in your area and put those phone numbers in your phone. Get educated to help others down the road.

July 30

Character defects, schmefects! It’s no wonder when we are focused on the negative aspects of our character all the fucking time, we get depressed and miserable. What about our character assets? Let’s not forget that we also picked up some good habits along the way. Unfortunately, some of us tend to neglect this aspect of our daily inventories, self-talk, and/or reflection. We focus so much on character defects that we forget our character assets. You are more than the bad things you’ve done, so why not make a list of the things you do right. If you did a Fourth Step and you excluded this information, you did not do a complete inventory. What did you want to keep, and what did you want to discard?

Reflections

Do I tend to focus on my character defects more than my character assets? Is it true that whatever I focus my attention on becomes my reality? (Whoa, heavy shit, man!)

Daily Challenge

Search for “List of Character Defects and Assets in Recovery” on Google. Make a note of your character assets and observe how you feel about yourself as you begin to redefine who you really are.

July 29

In the past, people (notice I didn’t say, ‘friends’) described me as “An open book that you have to read whether you like it or not.” And that was only partly true. What they didn’t know is that most of that book was fiction, a lie. Mixed in with the truth was a load of lies and falsities I had conjured up around the truth. I had stories to tell about running from the police like everyone else, but I always loved adding more to the story. Running from the police was fine, but what if I had a broken ankle? Or what if I was carrying an eight-ball of meth and needed to get rid of it but couldn’t because my dealer would kill me? I mean, WHAT IF! Though my story was still exciting on its own, I loved to embellish everything to the maximum point of believability. After any length of time, most people would catch on to my tall tales and no longer want to hang out with me because of all the lies and bullshit.

Reflections

Could it be that the one thing you do to make yourself so fucking interesting has the opposite effect than what you desire?

Daily Challenge

Try not to tell everyone, everything, all the time. Instead, leave something to the imagination once in a while.

July 28

“I’m gooooooinnnggg through chaaaaanngeees!” It’s a familiar refrain. The Buddhists called it impermanence. This word describes the state of everything in the known Universe. Nothing, absolutely nothing, is not going through a state of transformation. Everything that gives birth must die. The sun rises and falls. Plants grow and decay. Everything changes. As addicts and alcoholics, we tend to resist change in all forms. And will do many strange things to have the appearance of permanence in our lives. We isolate. We stick to our routines. Eat the same thing at the same place. Sit in the same chair at each meeting. We embrace the habits of control. But regardless, under the surface of that façade, things are changing whether we like it or not. So, we might as well embrace it.

Reflections

Am I resisting change? Do I try to build my world around a false sense of permanence? What can I do to embrace change today?

Daily Challenge

Sit in a different chair than usual this week. Shake things up!

July 27

Intuition. I fucking knew that would happen! No. Not that. That’s a premonition. Intuition is an inner knowing of what to do next. It usually has more to do with a feeling than anything else. As we get sober, we develop this “sixth sense” and learn how to listen and decipher it better as time passes. The Big Book of A.A. says, “We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us,” in the promises at the bottom of page 83. This promise has come true for those who can stick around and tap into the understanding within themselves. This is not voodoo bullshit or spiritual psychobabble fuckery. Speaking from my firsthand experience, I have been able to know and trust my gut feeling more and more as I have stayed sober and involved in the practice of recovery. Sure, bad things happen, and I still say, “How did that happen?” But there are moments when I can feel and know how to do what used to simply baffle me. I love that!

Reflections

Are you discovering your intuition today? Have you thought about how this has improved since you got sober?

Daily Challenge

Make an effort to connect to your inner knowing. Pay attention, throughout today, to how you feel more than what you think.

July 26

During a conversation with my wife in my early sobriety, she referenced the birth of my second child. As she described the situation, I could not recall the moment. I had been drinking heavily during that time, and it was clear that I did not immediately recall the memory of my secondborn child. This floored me, and I broke down in tears. Initially, I was angry and upset at what I had done to myself. Causing memory loss was not what I wanted or intended in my drinking. Especially the good memories! As time has passed, I have recalled the memory of that time and the memory my wife specifically wanted to share. It took some time before it came back, but it did come back. Like most things in our lives, try to give it time. Allow the brain time to work and for the internal wounds to heal just a bit longer.

Reflections

Do you have to get everything back right now? Can it wait a while? Have you ever thought how lucky we are that we “forget” things?

Daily Challenge

Forgive yourself today. Relax. The worst has already happened.

July 25

Imagine for a moment that you are riding a horse. This horse represents all of your natural emotional energy. It is excitable and can engage in any emotion at any given time. It runs, gallops, and has the most powerful energy when instigated. Unfortunately, most of us act as passengers instead of riders on top of this horse and feel powerless as we stay on this steed when it powers on until it runs out of energy. Most of us act this way towards our emotions and feel powerless over them. Now, imagine that your mind is the rider on this horse. You train and practice with this horse all the time. You guide this horse and help channel this horse’s natural energies. This “thinking” part of you (the rider) must help to regulate your powerful emotional energies. Steering and guiding your horse by training him to understand the reins and desired actions relating to your movements. The union of the rider (our thinking) and our horse (our emotions) will allow us to act and react at a much higher level than we could before. All it takes is a little “giddy-up” from time to time.

Reflections

Do I have emotional sobriety today?

Daily Challenge

Take up to 10 deep breaths stretched out over the period of one minute.

FACT: Breathing deeply into your lungs can help ease pain, relax, and ease stress.

July 24

When you embark on this sobriety journey, you will find new things and embrace new ideas. It can be exciting to try on new concepts, like trying on different clothes or a new suit. We will want to see how it fits and if we are comfortable with this new outfit. After some time, we may grow tired of it or find something else that fits us better. Discovering who you really are is sometimes a matter of trial and error. We find things we appreciate more than others or embrace more than others. It is a matter of personal, subjective taste and understanding. And you have the right to change your mind. A year ago, you may have vehemently denied the existence of God, but after many life events and much consideration, you now believe. Or it could be the complete opposite. You have the right to change your mind, and you have a right to your opinion. None of this life is set in stone.

Reflections

Are you unwilling to change your views because of what others might think of you?

Daily Challenge

Share with someone what new ideas you have been listening to, reading, or acquiring. Be honest.

July 23

“One day is equal to every day.” ¬- Heraclitus

Twenty-four hours today. That’s all you get. Make the best of it! Work hard and get active! Do whatever that “thing” is, and do it to the best of your ability. If you can get this day right, you will have a recipe for the rest of your days and a chance to get your life right. It can be that simple. Build on each day's success and put a life together that is what you want. Don’t like something? Put it up for review today, and see why. Don’t just do things that make you feel good, either! You must remember to have balance and work towards that also. Cultivate a virtuous life that has deep purpose and meaning, not just the fun stuff.

Reflections

What you do today is a vote for who you will become tomorrow. What votes are you casting today?

Daily Challenge

Make journaling a habit. No, really! Not just something you talk about in meetings. Something you do for yourself. Start today.