March 31, 2023

39. Trauma-Informed Relational Healing: Building Connectedness In Romantic Partnerships & Society With Rebecca Nidorf

1 hour 14 minutes

Our capacity to authentically relate to one another is shaped not only by our life experiences, early childhood, and attachment, but the broader culture we live in and the myths we pick up from society about what relationships should look like. In this episode, I speak with a trauma-informed couple’s therapist about the qualities of healthy loving relationships, how toxic and transactional societal values shape how we relate, and real-life examples of moving through triggers and developing deeper intimacy.

Why taking a trauma-informed lens to couples counseling is crucial

The utility of “attachment styles” and putting it into context of child development and broader societal values

Learning from “in tact cultures” that values connectedness and belonging from birth

Transactional relationships and learning to see people beyond the scope of our own needs

The 5 adaptive strategies we learn in childhood that come up in interpersonal relationships

How to repair from conflict and deal with our triggers with real case examples

Using mythology, narrative, and intuition in couple’s work

Advice for those entering new relationships

Rebecca Nidorf, LCSW-R is a psychotherapist in private practice in the Hudson Valley. Rebecca Has been a practicing clinician for 25 years and part time at Bard College as a clinical supervisor and director of a crisis counseling program for 18 years. She began her career as a complex trauma therapist working with rape and incest survivors. This led to a private practice where she treats individuals and primarily, couples. Rebecca is an integrative therapist who uses teachings from a variety of mentors and practitioners ranging from Esther Perel, Terrance Real, Pia Melody, Clarissa Pinkola Estes, Ph.D, Francis Weller, Resmaa Menakem, Carol Giligan and many others. Rebecca considers herself to be a consummate student. She feels a sense of soulful gratitude when working with her clients in a therapeutic setting and when she is leading retreats and teaching. Rebecca is grateful for all of the many people who have trusted her with their stories over the course of her career.

Rebecca’s Website: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/rebecca-nidorf-new-paltz-ny/200303

Get bonus episodes on substack! ⁠⁠https://depthwork.substack.com/⁠⁠

Reclaiming All Parts of You: Healing Shame Workbook & Meditation : ⁠⁠⁠https://witty-creator-9045.ck.page/e89cafda64⁠⁠⁠

Resources:

Women Who Run with the Wolves by Clarissa Pinkola Estés https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/241823.Women_Who_Run_With_the_Wolves

Why Does Patriarchy Persist? by Carol Gilligan https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/39971978-why-does-patriarchy-persist

Esther Perel https://www.estherperel.com/

Disclaimer: The DEPTH Work Podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Information on this podcast in no way to be construed or substituted as psychological counseling, psychotherapy, mental health counseling, or any other type of therapy or medical advice.

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