You Must Be Some Kind of Therapist

80. From Shame to Resilience: Healing the Inner Child, with Kim O


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Kim O, coach and founder of HeartWorkU, joins me today to share wisdom on compassion, healing, parts work, spirituality, resilience, and the Enneagram. We discuss her journey from 30 years as a hairstylist to becoming a coach and her decision to leave her Master's program in Counseling Psychology due to ideological differences.


Kim presents her research on detransitioners and the lack of acknowledgement from the American Psychological Association (APA) on this topic. She emphasizes the importance of belief and resilience in her coaching practice, and how she helps clients separate their higher self from their wounded ego or inner child.


Kim explains her approach to coaching, which focuses on helping clients witness their feelings and hold space for them. She believes in the power of self-love and teaches clients to understand that they are resilient and have the answers within themselves. We also explore the differences between counseling and coaching, highlighting the importance of ethics in counseling and the relational aspect of both roles, as well as how Internal Family Systems and the Enneagram help us in our work with clients.


Kim shares her personal journey of healing from childhood trauma and the impact it had on her identity. She shares how she overcame shame and self-judgment by living in the present and recognizing that she is not defined by her past experiences.


Kim O is a Relational Soul Coach, Author, & Resilience Cheerleader. “When you recognize the power and beauty within your Soul, you are unafraid, confident, and able to face all of your challenges with LOVE!” Contact, workbooks, journals, free course of the month: https://linktr.ee/heartworku 


These books mentioned in this episode can be found via the Amazon affiliate links below or in my bookshop. Either way, a portion of proceeds help support the show. Thank you!

  • What is Ego, by Kim O: https://amzn.to/46FoGE2
  • Living in the Power of Your Energetic Signature, by Kim O: https://amzn.to/3S83GkZ 
  • Love Cures Anxiety, by Kim O: https://amzn.to/3tFWnXD  
  • Kim’s children’s book series is coming out soon. More information at https://www.heartworku.com/resilientkids
  • The Sacred Enneagram by Christopher Heuertz: https://amzn.to/3S8Ek6v


Other resources mentioned in this episode:

  • HeartWorkU YouTube channel
  • HeartWorkU.com
  • Sleeping at Last Podcast

By the way, during the episode, I couldn't remember the exact wording of Chris Heuertz's summation of Type One. Here is the phrase: Type One strives for principled excellence as moral duty.


00:00 Start

[00:02:48] Detransitioners and societal perceptions.

[00:05:20] Understanding detransitioners' experiences.

[00:08:35] Overcoming personal challenges.

[00:13:27] Resilience and overcoming challenges.

[00:16:09] Opportunity cost of microaggressions.

[00:21:23] APA's support of gender affirming care.

[00:24:00] Counseling versus coaching.

[00:27:14] Higher self and ego distinction.

[00:31:57] Therapy vs coaching distinction.

[00:35:03] Coaching and exploring the past.

[00:41:03] Trauma and stolen identity.

[00:43:56] Understanding Your Main Drive.

[00:48:49] Wounded ego defense mechanism.

[00:51:41] Children's book series.

[00:58:34] Anton's realization about prickles.

[01:01:13] I Saw No Way Back.

[01:03:53] Words of wisdom and compassion.

[01:07:28] Core fears and human condition.


To support this show, please leave a rating & review on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Subscribe, like, comment & share via my YouTube channel. Or recommend this to a friend!

Learn more about Do No Harm.


Take $200 off your EightSleep Pod Pro Cover with code SOMETHERAPIST at EightSleep.com.

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Check out my shop for book recommendations + wellness products.

Show notes & transcript provided with the help of SwellAI.

Special thanks to Joey Pecoraro for our theme song, “Half Awake,” used with gratitude and permission.


Watch NO WAY BACK: The Reality of Gender-Affirming Care (our medical ethics documentary, formerly known as Affirmation Generation). Stream the film or purchase a DVD. Use code SOMETHERAPIST to take 20% off your order. Follow us on X @2022affirmation or Instagram at @affirmationgeneration.

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