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"The field notes for Candy Apples are unhinged. If you guys have never read the field notes for this episode then buckle up. It is possibly equal or crazier than some of our craziest stuff that has gone on. I don not know why they did not show any of this." And Christi isn't downplaying that either. Off screen an entire war was waged between Lucas' mom Bridget and Cathy, which left our Bitches floored by the sheer lunacy of the situation. While you got a taste of it in the episode proper, there's so much more name calling and subterfuge that it's honestly a little hard to keep track of!

This week the ALDC and Candy Apples will pair off again at Sheer Talent in New Jersey... which of course since Abby has a stake in that competition it seems rather unlikely out the gate the Apples will stand a chance. Cathy is aware of this and enlists Erin Babbs to choreograph for the Candy Apples, hoping it'll not only produce great results but also annoy Abby in the process since she lost to Babbs a little over a month prior. It certainly annoys Abby, but it's going to take Cathy busting out a megaphone to really get her blood boiling (and Production is only too eager to oblige).

Quotes

• “Ugh, Jess is always bad. She's kind of like the new Christi, in that she's always showing up with some ugly shit." (10:33-10:39 | Christi)
• “Oh my gosh, is Abby telling someone to listen to their mother?" (1:20:33-1:20:36 | Kelly)
• “My biggest question tho is I would really like to know where they were holding Vivi hostage? Because having Cathy come without Vivi is a world I don't want to live in." (1:24:56-1:25:08 | Christi)
• “Abby is going to deliver the line that literally is going to light, and I said this last week, every gas lantern in America. So all of you just raise your glasses in a universal toast because you are drinking to what is, not maybe, but definitively the biggest contradiction ever uttered in the history of Dance Moms." (1:34:43-1:35:12 | Christi)

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