Episode 23 is just another journey towards finding out if Oprah knows about us or not. We’re pretty sure she Tweeted at us but it’s hard to tell for sure.

We kick this episode off by listening to some listener feedback which results in Alison yelling at everyone and then fangirling over Tim Gunn. We also read a specific question about Dana’s peculiar beauty regiment.

As usual, the Absolute Worst Therapy segment is riddled with more questions about how we can trick our partners into having sex with us. We also meet a horrible boss and try to figure out what her problem is. Finally, we tap into a very serious subject (why do we always do this?) and try to help a listener navigate a relationship with a friend who is dealing with some very scary issues.

We end this episode with an Absolute Yourst about a horrible first date. The story sends Dana into such a tizzy that she gives a passionate speech about her most strong and heartfelt convictions. She gets so upset that we pop over to Neva’s Corner (this is when Dana makes us apologize to her grandma) and try to make the matter right.

Alison and Dana ALWAYS want to hear your problems, advice, feedback and Absolute Yoursts! You can contact them through their website, friend them on Facebook, or follow them on Instagram and Twitter.

**NOTE**

If you’re thinking about suicide, are worried about a friend or loved one, or would like emotional support, the Lifeline network is available 24/7 across the United States. The Lifeline is available for everyone, is free, and confidential. See website for additional crisis services and hotlines. Online chat services provided as well at suicidepreventionlifeline.org/talk-to-someone-now/

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

1-800-273-8255

Episode 23 is just another journey towards finding out if Oprah knows about us or not. We’re pretty sure she Tweeted at us but it’s hard to tell for sure.

We kick this episode off by listening to some listener feedback which results in Alison yelling at everyone and then fangirling over Tim Gunn. We also read a specific question about Dana’s peculiar beauty regiment.

As usual, the Absolute Worst Therapy segment is riddled with more questions about how we can trick our partners into having sex with us. We also meet a horrible boss and try to figure out what her problem is. Finally, we tap into a very serious subject (why do we always do this?) and try to help a listener navigate a relationship with a friend who is dealing with some very scary issues.

We end this episode with an Absolute Yourst about a horrible first date. The story sends Dana into such a tizzy that she gives a passionate speech about her most strong and heartfelt convictions. She gets so upset that we pop over to Neva’s Corner (this is when Dana makes us apologize to her grandma) and try to make the matter right.

Alison and Dana ALWAYS want to hear your problems, advice, feedback and Absolute Yoursts! You can contact them through their website, friend them on Facebook, or follow them on Instagram and Twitter.

**NOTE**

If you’re thinking about suicide, are worried about a friend or loved one, or would like emotional support, the Lifeline network is available 24/7 across the United States. The Lifeline is available for everyone, is free, and confidential. See website for additional crisis services and hotlines. Online chat services provided as well at suicidepreventionlifeline.org/talk-to-someone-now/

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

1-800-273-8255

We kick Episode 22 off with incredible feedback from the guy whose wife wouldn’t have sex with him. We’re basically best friends with him now. We also get some ghosting advice followed by a compliment that results in Dana impersonating Alison…again.

During the Absolute Worst Therapy segment, we try to help a listener get out of his strip-club obligations. We then continue on the Titty-Train and discuss when big ole boobies are too much!!!

Afterwards, we hear from a woman who’s trapped in a loveless marriage with a bad-boy and while this is concerning, Alison and Dana spend most of their response time trying to figure out the Oprah saying that perfectly sums up this behavior.

We finish this episode by reading some Absolute Yoursts (these are YOUR absolute worst stories). We begin with an X-rated story that starts with Disney and ends with a dildo. Since we were already discussing the horrors of Disney, we follow that up with two more stories of childhood vacations gone horribly awry.

Finally, we meet a poor man who describes himself as “not a bright person.” At first we feel bad for him but after hearing his story it’s pretty obvious that he his def dumb.

Alison and Dana ALWAYS want to hear your problems, advice, feedback and Absolute Yoursts! You can contact them through their website, friend them on Facebook, or follow them on Instagram and Twitter.

**NOTE**

If you’re thinking about suicide, are worried about a friend or loved one, or would like emotional support, the Lifeline network is available 24/7 across the United States. The Lifeline is available for everyone, is free, and confidential. See website for additional crisis services and hotlines. Online chat services provided as well at suicidepreventionlifeline.org/talk-to-someone-now/

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

1-800-273-8255

We kick Episode 22 off with incredible feedback from the guy whose wife wouldn’t have sex with him. We’re basically best friends with him now. We also get some ghosting advice followed by a compliment that results in Dana impersonating Alison…again.

During the Absolute Worst Therapy segment, we try to help a listener get out of his strip-club obligations. We then continue on the Titty-Train and discuss when big ole boobies are too much!!!

Afterwards, we hear from a woman who’s trapped in a loveless marriage with a bad-boy and while this is concerning, Alison and Dana spend most of their response time trying to figure out the Oprah saying that perfectly sums up this behavior.

We finish this episode by reading some Absolute Yoursts (these are YOUR absolute worst stories). We begin with an X-rated story that starts with Disney and ends with a dildo. Since we were already discussing the horrors of Disney, we follow that up with two more stories of childhood vacations gone horribly awry.

Finally, we meet a poor man who describes himself as “not a bright person.” At first we feel bad for him but after hearing his story it’s pretty obvious that he his def dumb.

Alison and Dana ALWAYS want to hear your problems, advice, feedback and Absolute Yoursts! You can contact them through their website, friend them on Facebook, or follow them on Instagram and Twitter.

**NOTE**

If you’re thinking about suicide, are worried about a friend or loved one, or would like emotional support, the Lifeline network is available 24/7 across the United States. The Lifeline is available for everyone, is free, and confidential. See website for additional crisis services and hotlines. Online chat services provided as well at suicidepreventionlifeline.org/talk-to-someone-now/

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

1-800-273-8255

September is National Suicide Prevention Awareness Month so we kick off Episode 21 with a heartbreaking and heartwarming story by UCB teacher and Los Angeles comedian Julie Brister (Twitter: @bristahsouljah). You can find the article in its entirety here: https://medium.com/@bristahsouljah/laurie-cbc634aaf8d9.

We also read some feedback from a listener who confirms that we are actually helping people!!! This leads to Dana saying nice things to Alison and Alison freaks out.

During our Absolute Worst Therapy segment, we talk about money…and how mother fucking dumb it is. But as always, we have a solution:

https://www.iwillteachyoutoberich.com/. We then meet yet another spouse who asks her partner for an open relationship, STOP DOING THAT! We read her question and try to get to the crux of the problem.

Afterwards Dana regales us with an Absolute Yourst wherein she inappropriately touches a stranger and gets something off her chest. After all the malarkey, we are forced to once again apologize to Dana’s grandma, Neva. SORRY, NEVA!

Alison and Dana ALWAYS want to hear your problems, advice, feedback and Absolute Yoursts! You can contact them through their website, friend them on Facebook, or follow them on Instagram and Twitter.

**NOTE**

If you’re thinking about suicide, are worried about a friend or loved one, or would like emotional support, the Lifeline network is available 24/7 across the United States. The Lifeline is available for everyone, is free, and confidential. See website for additional crisis services and hotlines. Online chat services provided as well at suicidepreventionlifeline.org/talk-to-someone-now/

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

1-800-273-8255

September is National Suicide Prevention Awareness Month so we kick off Episode 21 with a heartbreaking and heartwarming story by UCB teacher and Los Angeles comedian Julie Brister (Twitter: @bristahsouljah). You can find the article in its entirety here: https://medium.com/@bristahsouljah/laurie-cbc634aaf8d9.

We also read some feedback from a listener who confirms that we are actually helping people!!! This leads to Dana saying nice things to Alison and Alison freaks out.

During our Absolute Worst Therapy segment, we talk about money…and how mother fucking dumb it is. But as always, we have a solution:

https://www.iwillteachyoutoberich.com/. We then meet yet another spouse who asks her partner for an open relationship, STOP DOING THAT! We read her question and try to get to the crux of the problem.

Afterwards Dana regales us with an Absolute Yourst wherein she inappropriately touches a stranger and gets something off her chest. After all the malarkey, we are forced to once again apologize to Dana’s grandma, Neva. SORRY, NEVA!

Alison and Dana ALWAYS want to hear your problems, advice, feedback and Absolute Yoursts! You can contact them through their website, friend them on Facebook, or follow them on Instagram and Twitter.

**NOTE**

If you’re thinking about suicide, are worried about a friend or loved one, or would like emotional support, the Lifeline network is available 24/7 across the United States. The Lifeline is available for everyone, is free, and confidential. See website for additional crisis services and hotlines. Online chat services provided as well at suicidepreventionlifeline.org/talk-to-someone-now/

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

1-800-273-8255

Episode 20 includes a lot of input from our male listeners and is then sprinkled with a little bit of breastfeeding talk by Alison.

Alison and Dana continue to worry about the male perspective so they kick off the show by reading some listener feedback…FROM A MAN!!! Afterwards Alison gets some feedback about her “baby brain” FROM ANOTHER MAN!!! Also, we hear from a woman who has concerns about Dana…obviously.

During the Absolute Worst Therapy session Alison continues to struggle with her emotional instability and Dana offers some support. They then read a problem FROM A MAN about some family issues coupled with anger issues. As usual, Dana and Alison are real divided on the solution to this one. Afterwards, we hear from ANOTHER MAN, NO BIG DEAL MOTHER FUCKERS!!!!! This poor guy got real bamboozled over a dick pic and we try like hell to lead him in the right direction. Finally, we try to figure out how many dates you have to wait until you sleep WITH A MAN!

We end this episode with a few Absolute Yoursts (these are YOUR absolute worst stories) and we meet Dana’s spirit animal!!! Alison then goes on a non sequitur about eating disorders and Dana tries to decide if she has one. Our final Yourst is about peeing in the wrong places. It happens!

Alison and Dana ALWAYS want to hear your problems, advice, feedback and Absolute Yoursts! You can contact them through their website, friend them on Facebook, or follow them on Instagram and Twitter.

**NOTE**

If you’re thinking about suicide, are worried about a friend or loved one, or would like emotional support, the Lifeline network is available 24/7 across the United States. The Lifeline is available for everyone, is free, and confidential. See website for additional crisis services and hotlines. Online chat services provided as well at suicidepreventionlifeline.org/talk-to-someone-now/

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

1-800-273-8255

Episode 20 includes a lot of input from our male listeners and is then sprinkled with a little bit of breastfeeding talk by Alison.

Alison and Dana continue to worry about the male perspective so they kick off the show by reading some listener feedback…FROM A MAN!!! Afterwards Alison gets some feedback about her “baby brain” FROM ANOTHER MAN!!! Also, we hear from a woman who has concerns about Dana…obviously.

During the Absolute Worst Therapy session Alison continues to struggle with her emotional instability and Dana offers some support. They then read a problem FROM A MAN about some family issues coupled with anger issues. As usual, Dana and Alison are real divided on the solution to this one. Afterwards, we hear from ANOTHER MAN, NO BIG DEAL MOTHER FUCKERS!!!!! This poor guy got real bamboozled over a dick pic and we try like hell to lead him in the right direction. Finally, we try to figure out how many dates you have to wait until you sleep WITH A MAN!

We end this episode with a few Absolute Yoursts (these are YOUR absolute worst stories) and we meet Dana’s spirit animal!!! Alison then goes on a non sequitur about eating disorders and Dana tries to decide if she has one. Our final Yourst is about peeing in the wrong places. It happens!

Alison and Dana ALWAYS want to hear your problems, advice, feedback and Absolute Yoursts! You can contact them through their website, friend them on Facebook, or follow them on Instagram and Twitter.

**NOTE**

If you’re thinking about suicide, are worried about a friend or loved one, or would like emotional support, the Lifeline network is available 24/7 across the United States. The Lifeline is available for everyone, is free, and confidential. See website for additional crisis services and hotlines. Online chat services provided as well at suicidepreventionlifeline.org/talk-to-someone-now/

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

1-800-273-8255

We start Episode 19 with some listener feedback and we discuss what an “apple body” is. We then end up on the subject of pants and it causes Dana so much anxiety that she starts double-fisting peanut butter. We also hear about another listener sex injury and then a guy writes in with advice for a previous listener’s problem and it’s obviously better than the advice that Dana and Alison came up with cause they’re basically the opposite of Oprah.

Alison and Dana recently celebrated their birthdays. Alison is depressed and Dana tries to lift her up by listing all the things she’ll never be able to accomplish now that she’s almost 40. Helpful…

We continue the Absolute Therapy session by helping a woman figure out why she hates all other women and also why she dreads dressing up. Basically she’s a Dana/Alison hybrid. Afterwards we meet another woman who is pregnant, angry and freaking the fuck out!

During the Absolute Yourst segment of our show we learn a valuable lesson about when it’s appropriate to eat freezer caramels. We then meet a fun-loving gay man who recounts the horrific consequences of dating apps.

This episode ends with a Neva’s Corner. This is where Dana makes Alison apologize to her grandma, Neva. Ultimately, Alison can’t remember what she’s apologizing for but they get there eventually.

Alison and Dana ALWAYS want to hear your problems, advice, feedback and Absolute Yoursts! You can contact them through their website, friend them on Facebook, or follow them on Instagram and Twitter.

**NOTE**
If you’re thinking about suicide, are worried about a friend or loved one, or would like emotional support, the Lifeline network is available 24/7 across the United States. The Lifeline is available for everyone, is free, and confidential. See website for additional crisis services and hotlines. Online chat services provided as well at suicidepreventionlifeline.org/talk-to-someone-now/

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

1-800-273-8255

We start Episode 19 with some listener feedback and we discuss what an “apple body” is. We then end up on the subject of pants and it causes Dana so much anxiety that she starts double-fisting peanut butter. We also hear about another listener sex injury and then a guy writes in with advice for a previous listener’s problem and it’s obviously better than the advice that Dana and Alison came up with cause they’re basically the opposite of Oprah.

Alison and Dana recently celebrated their birthdays. Alison is depressed and Dana tries to lift her up by listing all the things she’ll never be able to accomplish now that she’s almost 40. Helpful…

We continue the Absolute Therapy session by helping a woman figure out why she hates all other women and also why she dreads dressing up. Basically she’s a Dana/Alison hybrid. Afterwards we meet another woman who is pregnant, angry and freaking the fuck out!

During the Absolute Yourst segment of our show we learn a valuable lesson about when it’s appropriate to eat freezer caramels. We then meet a fun-loving gay man who recounts the horrific consequences of dating apps.

This episode ends with a Neva’s Corner. This is where Dana makes Alison apologize to her grandma, Neva. Ultimately, Alison can’t remember what she’s apologizing for but they get there eventually.

Alison and Dana ALWAYS want to hear your problems, advice, feedback and Absolute Yoursts! You can contact them through their website, friend them on Facebook, or follow them on Instagram and Twitter.

**NOTE**
If you’re thinking about suicide, are worried about a friend or loved one, or would like emotional support, the Lifeline network is available 24/7 across the United States. The Lifeline is available for everyone, is free, and confidential. See website for additional crisis services and hotlines. Online chat services provided as well at suicidepreventionlifeline.org/talk-to-someone-now/

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

1-800-273-8255