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Family and separating from family issues because when I think of back to life, back to reality, one of the things I think about is getting back to dealing with family issues and either the support or the lack of support or the lack of interest from family members in your acting career.

The Language of Letting Go

"We can draw a healthy line, a healthy boundary between ourselves and our nuclear family, and we can separate ourselves from their issues.

And I think that's amazing because I don't think I realized that I could separate my issues or anybody else's issues from me.

I thought anybody I spoke to their issue was my issue, and my issue was their issue. But that is highly codependent thinking and does not lead to a happy or successful life.

"Some of us have family members who are addicted to alcohol, drugs, or you know what, anything else, and they are not in recovery from their addiction. And some of us have family members who have unresolved codependency issues."

And I might also add those might be your unresolved codependency issues, which, when I think about the word codependency, I think of it in terms of I'm not all right unless you are all right.

And I judge how I feel based on you and just Tom Dicker, Harry Sue, Evelyn, Peter, whoever doesn't matter.

"Family members may be addicted, for example, to pain, misery, suffering, martyrdom, or victimization. We may have family members who have unresolved abuse issues or unresolved family-of-origin issues.

We may have families addicted to work, eating, or sex. Our family may be completely enmeshed or may have a disconnected family in which members have little contact."

And this is where it starts to hit. And I think the core issue here is that we may be like our family and love our family, but we are, and I want you to hear this because this is the biggest part.

We are separate—human beings with individual rights and individual issues.

One of the ways this was described to me is that if you have a highly enmeshed family, It's like a bowl of spaghetti, but nobody knows whose strands are who's.

It's one piece of spaghetti. It's so enmeshed that it feels, smells, tastes, sounds just like everyone else's issue in the family.

And also, when I say the word family, it could be community. Don't think that this has to be blood. It certainly doesn't.

Or your adopted family, your friends, or group of friends, keep in mind that's true too.

"One of our primary rights is to begin feeling better whether or not the other people choose to do the same."

O M G. Hallelujah. Let's sing it to the rooftops.

We have the right to feel better.

We have the right to our future. Whether or not other people in our lives choose to do the same or not.

We do not have to feel guilty about finding happiness and a life that works or going after a career that we are passionate about. I.

And we do not have to take on our families' issues as our own to be loyal or to show them that we love them.

I think that is also so huge and heartbreaking that on some level, maybe in the past, one has learned that I must go down that rabbit hole with that person to show them that I am loyal to them or that I love them.

"Often when we begin to care for ourselves, family members or friends will reverberate with overt and covert attempts to pull us back into the old system and roles."

So, one of the ways this was explained to me is that if you think of a bike wheel, all the spokes have a certain job.

But when one of those spokes decides, you know what? Not my life, not what I want. I'm not going that way. All the other spokes of the wheel get angry, which can feel like a tsunami upon you. It can feel overwhelming, and it can feel desperately lonely.

"We do not have to go."

Their attempts to pull us back are their issues; we must understand that their attempts to pull us back have to do with them, not with us. And I reiterate we are separate human beings.

"Taking care of ourselves and becoming healthy and happy does not mean we do not love them. It means we are addressing our issues."

It also means that we are going after our dreams, our universe-given dreams we have every right on the planet to pursue.

And the other thing is, and this is our part, we don't have to judge them because they have issues, nor do we have to allow them to do anything they would like to us just because they are our family, which means just because somebody is your family or your friend or someone in your life, you don't have to accept unacceptable behavior.

You do not have to accept unacceptable behavior from anyone.

We are free now. Free to take care of ourselves with family, friends, and everyone.

"Our freedom starts when we stop denying their issues and politely, but assertively, hand their stuff back to them.

Where it belongs to deal with their issues.

So, of course, everything I've just talked about has to do with boundaries, doing things that we may not be comfortable about standing up for ourselves. Self-worth. Self-confidence, self-knowledge.

That's a lot.

But we can do it. We can do it. And if you need help, Let me know.

Work with me privately

Learn More About Money Mastery for Actors

About Rose Marie:

Official "Auntie Bear," Rose Marie is Peter's right-hand woman at Acting Business Boot Camp. She learned the budget system and used it to completely renew her relationship with money. Moving from the kind of person who checked her bank account with her eyes closed every few months to knowing exactly how she wants to spend her resources to serve her goals.

She learned this system from Mama Bear herself, which completely changed her relationship with money, empowering her to help others do the same.

Rose Marie's history with money and how she came to the Money Mastery Budgeting program.

I just felt hopeless. I didn't know what to do.

Money was coming in very irregularly because I was working many different jobs.

And I really didn't know how to manage my money at all.

This system has completely transformed the way I look at money. I have like a 795 credit score; I'm able to save. I have zero debt. I paid it all off. I have savings. I have a retirement in stocks.

The budget system has completely overhauled my entire life in terms of finances.

I started coaching for the budget coaching in 2017.

So can you explain what Jason Harris's budget system looks like?

It's figuring out your predictable monthly spending and how much it takes to run us at a baseline.

I'm not talking about any of the extras. I'm talking about rent, cell phone insurance. I include my gym membership in my nut because going to the gym is really important to me. And I cannot survive as a human being if I don't work out.

And then also figuring out how much money you have left over for your unpredictable monthly spending.

And putting it all together using the income you made the month before.

So instead of trying to live with, "the money I made now gets spent now."

Hand-to-mouth does not work.

It really creates so much stress in your life in a way that is just unbearable.

The amount of anxiety, stress, and yucky feelings about myself and who I am. I thought I could never make money. I thought I wasn't good at making money; I thought I was just not good.

I had such a fixed mindset regarding income, spending, and finances.

On the second night, Peter deals with all the yucky feelings that come up when it yucky feelings.

We tie money up in so much of our own self-worth.

You can think your way into Right Action, and you can act your way into Right Thinking.

And I think your part of the course is acting your way into right thinking, and my part is thinking your way into right acting.

So it supports the goal of financial freedom.

More money not a problem. Less money problem.

Gamifying your spending.

"I am gonna have extra money left over in all my categories at the end of the month."

But the other thing that you made me do, which is really revolutionary for me, and I know all of the world is such an internet, digital. We all live on our phones, and there are so many apps that let you do this: you made me carry a little notebook in my purse or my backpack everywhere through New York City, and I would write down every single thing I spent money on, and at the end of the day, I would subtract how much I spent money on, from how much I had left.

And the act of writing it down just made me so much more aware of where my money was going.

AND I didn't give up the first time I forgot to do it.

And so the thing that I really tried to separate myself from was having to do it perfectly for it to work.

The other thing I love about the budget system, you don't have to do it perfectly for it to work.

The goal is to get 1% better at it and not give up the first time you hit some resistance.

Because it's just numbers.

I'll never forget the first month when I was in the green. I was like, "Oh my God, I can do this. This is not outside of my purview. I am capable of creating a financial abundance."

Even if it was a hundred dollars, it doesn't matter. It was still a hundred dollars.

The other thing that I love about this system, in terms of building confidence, is all you have to do is follow the steps.

If it takes three months to get from the red to the green, that's fine. You're just working the system, waking up every day, doing it as we teach it, and eventually, you're like, "Oh, I'm a master at this."

It becomes automatic after a while.

When I started doing it, first of all, when Jason taught it to me, I started crying. I just burst into tears. It was humiliating that I didn't know how to handle my money. I felt like I was stupid. I felt like I was totally incapable, that I wasn't smart.

These were all the things that came up for me around budgeting. And I just felt defective, and I had a tremendous amount of shame around it.

And I told myself, "Swallow your pride, suppress your ego, and remain teachable and see if he's got something here that works."

If I told you how much I have in savings now and how much, you know, abundance I have in my life because of his system, it's incredible.

I'll never forget the first person who used the system to move from New York to la. And like all she did was run the budget system for a few months.

Making rules for yourself.

You have to plan ahead. Otherwise, you end up spending money that you didn't want to spend.

An easy exercise everyone listening to this podcast can do right now:

• Print off all of your statements from the last month,
• Highlight any time you made an impulsive purchase, or you had negative emotions with a purchase
• Also, highlight all the subscriptions and things you didn't know you were paying for.

What it allows you to do is it gives you some awareness so that the next time you have the impulse to spend $40 on a new shirt when you're out and about,

Or get that $7 latte, especially when you're trying to fix your finances and, in the end, you don't care that much about the latte.

I'm not saying don't indulge sometimes, it's important to indulge, but I think to indulge with an awareness.

But also, to get all those purchases you didn't feel great about afterward, they didn't turn out how you wanted them to.

You spent money, and then you're like, "Ugh, why did I do that again? I'm self-sabotaging because I have these goals, but I just spent $200 on this thing that won't serve me."

And just by doing that exercise, you begin to elevate your awareness and your thoughts so that the next time that thing comes up, you'll maybe choose a different thing.

Understand that your budget system is not trying to make your life hard.

You're trying to find something livable and create your income around that.

Because if you say, "Oh, I'm gonna live on $500 a month." Well, yeah, you're living on oodles of noodles and ramen.

It's not practical, and that's not the point. Not spending money is not the point of the budget system.

There's so much morality tied up in spending money equals bad.

The reality is that we live in a world where we need to spend money, and also, spending money is fun when you save up.

Fun funds:

• you're an actor saving up for headshots,
• saving up for vacations
• create monthly patterns so you can end up where you want to be.

I went to Italy for three weeks last year with my fiancé. And I saved up for a year for that. But when I got to spend that money, did it feel good? And I did not even care about spending it. This is the realization of my yearlong dream.

"The walls of your comfort zone are lovingly decorated with your lifelong collection of favorite excuses." Jen Sincero

Mine was, "I'm bad at math, so that's why I couldn't budget. That's why I'm not smart around money."

Separating your self-worth from your bank account.

Acting your way into right thinking and thinking your way into right acting.

Day one is the practicality of it. That's the acting your way into the right thinking.

And then, day two is my teaching the thinking your way into right acting.

And it's also that both your actions must support your goal, and your thoughts must support your goal. Both of those things have to be happening at the same time to achieve it.

That's the recipe for success.

Figuring out where did this shit come from?

Without both together, you end up stuck because you can come up with a million excuses for why you can't do the budgeting.

I didn't think it would work as well as it did, and I mean, countless other people have said the same.

And then my thinking shifted with other things in my life because if this is true, what else is true?

I can manage my money; what else can I manage? That I didn't think that I could.

Think about where your money's going now and where you want it to go in the future.

For example, when I started saving and investing, I put in $10 a week.

That is like nothing. But I knew that if I just budgeted for that, it would get easier to add to it. And add on to that. And until you save a hundred dollars a week to invest in things.

The other thing about investing is just sitting there making money off my money.

And the other thing that I help think it helps with in terms of anxiety is it gives you, if you know how much it takes to run you, you're NUT.

If you know how much you need in your NUT and roughly how much you spend on groceries and everything else, that's your unpredictable expenses.

Then you find your magic number, which we call the number that it truly takes every month that you need to make in income.

And so it also allows you to be empowered to choose how many shifts you need in a week in a month. That's on how much extra in gig work you need to make.

For freelancers, the money comes in different months differently, but it also allows you to be like, "Okay, I made an extra two grand working on this acting project. Now I have two grand. Well, what do I do with that money?"

This budget system teaches you what to do with that extra money when it comes in.

So then, in the months that you have less money coming in, you don't freak out. Especially right now because I know times are hard with the strikes.

But this allows you to feel like you have a sense of control, even if your work is unpredictable.

Your money situation can be really fucked up like ours was, and there is hope.

We do record this, and you can, like, you can watch the course as many times as you need to.

Anyone that takes the course can work privately with Rose Marie for $35 an hour. Because people get stuck, and I want them to feel like they can get unstuck fast.

Private Coaching with Rose Marie

Free Masterclass

Today, I will read you something that a listener sent me, so thank you, Margaret.

I absolutely love this, and I'm going to read it just as it was presented to me because I think it's so inspirational about not giving up and also just it's about tenacity.

"Hi, Peter. I ran across this post on Twitter and had to share some good points. Didn't know any of this about the film Rocky. In 1975, Sylvester Stallone wrote the screenplay for Rocky. He shopped the script to every producer and studio in Hollywood but was repeatedly rejected.

Eventually, one production company, Chartoff-Winkler Productions, expressed interest, but there was one condition…

They didn't want Stallone to play Rocky. They wanted a "more marketable actor" for the leading role.

In fact, they were so desperate for Stallone to *not* play Rocky that they kept offering him increasing large sums of money to go away.

"It went up to $360,000," Stallone said, "to go away to get off my lawn, boy."

Stallone didn't take the money for two reasons:

1) "I had learned to manage on very little money," Stallone said, "I had it down to a science. I really didn't need much to live on, but more than that…"

2) "There was something about the idea of unrealized dreams, Stallone said, "I knew that if I sold the script, even for $500,000, I knew that after the money was gone, I would've become very bitter if I never realized my dream."

Money Mastery for Actors

This course is just like what Stallone is talking about. It's really finding what your magic number is and what it takes to make that. Do that repeatedly so you're not living hand to mouth so that when oh, a strike happens, you are not panicking.

So you have money. The money you make today is actually for the future, not for today. You're not living that hand to mouth, and you are cognizant of what is going on with your money.

So that gave him the freedom to say, "You know what I'm, I'm good, how I am. I'm good. How I am."

He goes deeper, and he talks about that money. Money comes, money goes, money comes, money goes.

He said he'd be very bitter once the half a million dollars was gone because he would've sold out.

He would've sold out his dream. Think about it, $500,000 or the career that Sylvester Stallone has had today.

Tom Rothman, CEO of Sony, says, "Be fiscally responsible so you can be creatively reckless. "

The trick is to be fiscally responsible so you can be creatively reckless.

Hollywood is a ruthless business. If Rocky failed, that likely would've ended Sylvester Stallone's acting career.

But because he had his fiscal responsibilities down to a science, Stallone could make the reckless decision to turn down the money and gamble his career on Rocky.

And this is the thing; if you are not worried about your money, you can be so free.

Because you know you're taken care of. You have that safety net. Wouldn't you love to have that safety net?

Now let's talk about the other takeaway.

Stallone turned down the money because he feared the bitter person he would've become if he never went for his dream. This leads me to the core work question: Are you really pursuing your dream?

And if you are not really going for your dream every single day, why not?

Why aren't you going for it? What is standing in your way? Oh, so good.

The screenwriter, Brian Kopelman, talks about why he finally started writing after many years of putting it off.

"What I finally realized was that if I allowed these creative impulses to die, It would be like a real death, and like any form of death, it would be toxic, and this toxicity would ooze out of me onto everyone and everything."

The core work has been fully responsible for me going after what I want to do. It's the core work. It's the work on myself. It's the self-confidence it's for; it's the part of me knowing in and of myself I am enough when I create.

I can also do so freely because I'm fiscally responsible, and that is why I hammer time after time, after time, after time after time about core work in these podcasts, because that is the key to your success.

So that you can say, "I am not gonna let my creative impulses die."

Okay. The final quote for you.

"If you don't take money, they can't tell you what to do. Kid. Money is the cheapest thing. Liberty, freedom is the most expensive." –Bill Cunningham.

If you didn't have fear, How would you go after your career? What would you do differently?

Sign up for The Weekly Adjustment (first month free).

Today we're going to talk about a humbling subject: feelings and surrender.

It encourages us to suppress our egos just enough. If you can, think of that game of limbo to get under the bar.

Can you suppress your ego enough to get to the lesson that the universe is trying to teach you on the other side?

And I think that that is so interesting as an actor because I always feel like a character is teaching me, but for the character to teach me, I need to suppress who I am a little bit. See what they are saying, and so allowing that character to come to me instead of putting myself on that character.

The idea of that character allowing and suppressing that ego just enough so that that character can speak through you so that you can truly be a vessel for the character.

The Language Of Letting Go

"Surrendering is a highly personal and spiritual experience."

And I just mentioned that because I think that surrendering to the universe is, is a very personal thing.

Some people get on their knees and they pray. I love to light candles. Some people go for a walk, and I think it is really finding. That ability in you to let it go just a little bit to let go of yourself and be open to what the universe, the character, whatever is trying to tell you.

"Surrender is not something we can do in our heads. It is not something we can force or control by willpower. It is something we experience."

And when I surrender, I feel it inside. I also think that if you can connect it to an action like getting on your knees or going for a walk or whatever it is for you, it's very important that you find what is personal to you.

So much of the core work that I teach is about teaching you how to have a relationship with a power greater than yourself or the universe, or whatever you want to call it, your higher intelligence, that will, in turn help you to solve your problems,

But I also think this: surrendering takes practice.

Surrendering takes practice. It's not something that happens overnight. It gets better with practice, and then it is truly like a key to a door that you can put the key in and open that up.

The key to surrender, the key to willingness. They talk a lot about this in the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous, which is, I think, one of the most spiritual books ever written.

And they talk about this surrendering.

"Acceptance or surrender is not a tidy package. Often it is a package full of hard feelings, anger, rage, sadness, followed by release and relief. As we surrender, we experience our frustration and anger at God. Or the universe and at other people, at ourself and at life."

Because what happens when we surrender is that we are giving up our control, and our ego does not like that at all.

"Then we come to the core of the pain and the sadness. The heavy emotional burden inside that must come out before we can feel good."

And I'm just going to share my experience with this.

When I first started core work, I felt like I had a gallon of tears that needed to come out through my eyeballs, and I wasn't going to get through it until it reached empty. But am I glad I did it? The rewards have been incredible.

"Often these emotions are connected to healing and release at a deep level."

I notice that when I can truly surrender, so much energy is released, and it is that energy, that pent-up energy that you just heard released, that stands in the way of me receiving the good and the abundance. The universe is constantly trying to bring to me.

"Surrender sets the wheels in motion. Our fear and anxiety about the future are released when we surrender."

Because the reason why our fear and our anxiety about the future are released when we surrender is because we give up trying to control it and accept that our job is truly just to manage it.

"We are protected. We are guided. Good things have been planned. The next step is now being taken. Surrender is the process that allows us to move forward. If you are stuck, surrender is the answer. It is how the universe moves us forward. Trust in the rightness of timing and the freedom at the other end. As you struggle humanly, we are humans through this incredible spiritual experience."

If you need help, If you need help surrendering or feel stuck, I can help you. If money is an issue, we have a free month of core work coaching available for you with The Weekly Adjustment.

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About Juan Carlos:

Juan Carlos Diaz is an actor born and raised in New York City. He began acting at the age of six in various school plays and musicals while in private school.

While still in high school, he began working at the Puerto Rican Traveling Theatre under the direction of Miriam Colon Valle, which led to his first Equity production at the age of 17 at New Media Repertory Theatre, where he immediately became part of the children's theatre company there.

Juan Carlos holds a BA in theatre from Bard College, where he studied under the tutelage of JoAnne Akalaitis and Liz Smith.

His work can be seen in BULL, HALSTON, LAW & ORDER, LAW & ORDER SVU, The Last Thing He Wanted (with ANNE HATHAWAY), and many other TV shows and films.

I've always been a good listener so I can figure out the homework later and take notes.

I went for the audition, and then this went on for about two years. I would even get emails that he's pinned for this with just the name. And you start going, "Well, I haven't auditioned for that in months, if not a year. Okay, what's the name? Let me start doing homework." And then, eventually we got an offer, and it was a guest star spot.

It allowed me to understand what our mentors try to instill in us.

Sometimes it's waiting. I got a, "I can't let you go out on this, not this CoStar. I'm going to wait for something bigger for you."

I don't care if I'm one line or a scene. You're soaking in so much that you're going, "Oh, okay. What is that? That's the gaffer. What's he doing? Okay. Because I need to know this, right."

And be part of the collective. That show allowed me to connect with, it's one of its stars, Fred Rodriguez, and being a Latino.

It allowed me to say, "Hey man, I came out of college, and I didn't have hope, and I would see you on this show," I think he was on Six Feet Under. And I identified.

I thanked him because he is part of a seminal movement across the board in this disenfranchised world, and he helped open doors and be a part of his show in this capacity.

Not to mention, I have scenes with him.

Networking

You know, you'll run into a friend who you haven't done a thing with in a while, and then you, that might be a thing, or at least you're like, "Hey, let's stay in contact."

One of the things that you're bringing up is relationships.

It's finding those pockets of the right people.

And I think now I'm starting to understand networking way better, which is, I don't have to go and do this whole formal, like a date. It's my friend who has a film. I want to support that. Oh, now I have seen four other films. I'm going to reach out to the festival, and I'm going to reach out to the directors and say, "Hey man, love that thing. Identify with that."

It's also about being genuine with it. In other words, if you see a director's movie and don't like it, that's not a director you'll reach out to.

Only reach out to the people who you really, really like.

Something that was taught to me very early in my career, and unfortunately, it's much easier to say than to do and implement, is it's one audition in a lifetime of auditions.

So you bombed an audition, honey; there will be 10,000 of these after this. You may not think so, but there will be.

The other thing that you said is that, when you were talking about the spokes of the wheel, you know, I think a lot, a lot of times, the actors think they have to be the whole wheel. You don't have to be the entire wheel; you just have to do your part well.

One more brilliant thing that you said is this idea that you're coming in to a casting director, to an agent, to a producer, to a writer, to a celebrity as peers.

You're not trying to get them to like you.

There is no us; we are figuring out this thing and bringing our own ingredients.

If you want to get better, you have to have those conversations either with somebody who sees it outside of you. And or with yourself.

Remain teachable.

Measuring your progress.

I allow myself somehow to get back to the work, and because I'm so, in a good way, obsessed with it, it's what allows me to feel 100% truly alive.

Watching movies and tv to all creativity to come.

Read a play.

Improv Class

I have a choice. I can get involved with the turmoil and, you know, continue to make it more miserable for others and for myself. Or I can stand for peace and reason and strength within myself.

It's really about keeping the focus on yourself during the chaotic times, especially when there's so much chaos around us right now.

The Language of Letting Go

"Letting go of chaos. No good work comes from unrest. Unrest, fear, anger, or sadness may motivate us. These feelings are sometimes intended to compel action. But our best work emerges after these feelings have been replaced by peace."

When I am too hot in my response or my reaction, I'm just getting into the problem and trying to control it.

A response is a reaction with a pause and a thought behind it. And really, what I'm talking about there is when I have given myself a cushion of peace.

Because I don't do my best thinking, I don't make my best choices when deeply embroiled in fear, anger, sadness, or some other huge emotion.

And again, what I talk about in the core work is working for you instead of working against you.

And I'm working against myself when I react because I'm hot, in flames, turned on by anger, fear, excitement, or any large emotion.

But when I give that cushion of peace, I'm working in tandem with the universe.

I light a candle before I coach, and I light a candle before I do a podcast. And I do that to create that cushion of peace, to invite the universe into something I'm going to do, or a situation that may be difficult because I'm reminding myself, I want the universe to be in charge of this, not me.

And that is how I can let go of chaos.

"We will not accomplish our task any sooner or any better by performing it out of a sense of urgency, fear, anger, or sadness."

Now my ego will say to that bullshit.

That is not thinking and acting and choosing my actions and thoughts with thought and intelligence, and with one of my favorite words, if not my most favorite word, wisdom.

Whenever I act impulsively, I am reacting and want to respond to my life. I don't want to react to it anymore.

Our reactions were given to us to save our lives.

Fear was given to us to save our lives, not to panic about things we're trying to control.

If you can understand how you are around these bigger emotions and be able to give yourself again that cushion of peace, wiser choices, choices with wisdom, can come out of that.

"Let go of unrest.

Let peace fill the void. We do not have to forfeit our power, our God-given personal power. Our universe-given personal power or our peace to do the work we are called upon to do today will give us all the power we need to do what we are meant to do when it is time."

And again, that goes back to that serenity prayer I've talked about so many times in our podcasts.

"Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change. Courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference."

Which is really asking for the wisdom to know the difference between what I can handle and what I'm trying to control.

It is my job to handle this day. It is not my job to control it.

"Let peace come first, then proceed. The task will get done naturally and on time."

So basically, what that's saying is allow yourself to stop and invite the universe in. Invite that cushion of peace in and then proceed and trust that it will get done.

Take the actions, and let go of the result.

I have found in my past, in my early actor years, that when. Situations like a strike or a difficult situation on a set would happen. I could really get in there with the emotions, but I don't think that was really ever helping anything.

My presence at a picket is enough. My chanting is enough. If I am involved in the board and with the strike committee, fantastic. But I cannot control the strike.

I can't; I can support it. I can be there for it. I can thank my fellow members for participating, but I don't need to get so heated up.

I need to stand up for what's right, but I can do that better if I let go of the chaos and insert that cushion of peace.

I will stand a greater chance of being listened to if it's actually essential that someone listen to me because I'm only one member in an incredible, incredible union.

Inspiration from Martha Graham.

Broaden your improv skills with Peggy Etra

I take pride in this podcast that I just let you see me for who I am, a flawed human being.

Cause that's what artists and characters are.

I try to use these little mistakes I make as teaching tools on how to be kinder to ourselves.

"I confess that I had a burning desire to be excellent but no faith that I could be. Martha said to me very quietly, there is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action.

And because there is only you. And because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique, and if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium, and it will be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly to keep the channel open.

You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work. You have to keep yourself open and aware to the urges that motivate you. Keep the channel open. As for you, Agnes, you have so far used about one-third of your talent."

A burning desire to be excellent but no faith that I could be.

Today, I taught a class for my core work coaching group, The Weekly Adjustment.

And I was talking about how when we make mistakes, we are not responsible for our first thought, but we are responsible for our second.

The first time I tried it, I was like, "Ugh, you're never gonna get it."

"You're not doing it right. Oh, this is a waste."

But somehow, I was able to say to myself, "Hey, this is the first time you've done it. Just get through it. Just take the action, let go of the results and see what happens."

Then I was brave enough to try it again the second time, and the second time it was easier.

And I was like, oh, wait a minute. I can do this.

I can handle this.

And not only that, and this is how it ties into the quote, I noticed where I was weak and what I needed to do to get stronger, or in the words of Agnes de Mille, be excellent.

See, it's not in strengthening our strengths that necessarily make us excellent. It is strengthening our weaknesses that make us excellent.

Great artists dive into what is difficult and try and solve it. Great athletes find what muscles are weak and try to strengthen them to get a greater performance.

"Martha said to me very quietly, there is a vitality, a life force, and energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action.

And because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique."

I want you to think about that. There is only one of you. There is only one of you.

I remember I was going through a very, very, very tough time many years ago. And I made a decision to make it through that tough time. And I said to myself at that time, "If there is just one person I can help for even one second, my going through this will have been worth it."

It was the universe saying you have a message someone desperately needs to hear. You are the only person who will be able to translate that message to that one person to save their day or their life, or their career or help them along in that difficult day.

Well, I'm here to tell you that you have that too, and that's why you have a responsibility to yourself and the universe to express yourself uniquely.

She goes on to say, "And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium, and it will be lost."

Think of how tragic that is. Think of if Picasso never painted; if Monet never painted, if Martha Graham never danced, it would be lost. If Vermeer never painted.

Suppose Rembrandt had never painted if Spielberg had never made movies. If Charlie Chaplin never got on the screen, it would be lost. The world would not have it.

We wouldn't have E.T.; we wouldn't have Girl with a Pearl Earring; we wouldn't have Rembrandt's self-portrait. We wouldn't have the Night Watch.

"It is not your business to determine how good it is, how valuable, or how it compares with other expressions."

And, what it's saying, is it's your job to create it is your responsibility as an artist to create it is not your job to judge.

When you get on a stage as an actor, it is your job to portray that character, their wants, and needs, and be in the moment with their situation.

It is the most important thing in that moment. It is not what the audience thinks of you. That is your ego.

However, it is your business to keep the channel open.

You are on one side, and the universe is on the other side of the tunnel, and in the middle of the tunnel is all this junk.

And what core work is about clearing that channel. That's all it is. It's about teaching you to have a relationship with the universe that, in turn, can solve all your problems and, in turn, can inspire you always if you are open.

Now here she says something that I actually disagree with. Oh my God, I disagree with Martha Graham.

Now this is how you know I'm confident because I can actually say that.

"you do not even have to believe in yourself or your work."

I'm sorry, I disagree. I believe you do need to believe in yourself, and I do believe you need to believe in your work.

I think that is a necessity. It also leads to a happier life, but you can choose. You can take what you like and leave the rest on that.

"You have to keep yourself open and aware to the urges that motivate you."

Amen. Hallelujah. Martha Graham, sing it loud. Yes. Yes. Such inspiration. Let it motivate you.

Keep the channel open. Keep the channel open.

And then she says to Agnes de Mille, "As for you, Agnes, you have so far used about one-third of your talent."

That's the bit that just kills me.

Can you imagine if I am only using one-third of my talent? What the hell am I doing with the other two-thirds?

Why am I blocking it? How can I clear it out? Because my talent serves.

My talent serves, and that's not being egotistical or anything because, to be quite honest, my talent doesn't come from me. My talent comes from the universe. I want to be a vessel for its talent.

Yeah. Shit, we don't have one strike going on. We now got two.

So, what are we going to do about it? Well, I think the first thing I'm just going to do is I'm just going to share with you my feelings about it.

I do think this strike is necessary. AI is terrifying for the actor, and I am so proud and honored to be a part of a union that recognizes that.

Having your image so that a company just can use it, however they want to use it is just unacceptable.

I don't think it's worth it.

So what do we do now?

Free Masterclass

The three pillars are the three things that I really think you want to focus on.

Two of them in particular right now.

One, you're acting training. This is not the time to slide.

This is the time to ensure you are still going to the gym.

This is the time to work out your actor body.

I have the Acting Business Bootcamp Strike Challenge that I gave all of my Weekly Accountability Group actors.

It's a monologue workout to keep you going as an actor.

I'm asking for you to get six monologues on tap. Okay? That means, just like you would pour a beer, you would pour this monologue.

So I'm asking for at least:

1. One contemporary comedic monologue
2. One contemporary dramatic monologue
3. One classical comedic monologue
4. One classical dramatic monologue
5. One Shakespearean comedic monologue
6. And one Shakespearean dramatic monologue

This is one thing that you can do for your acting career.

Another is reading the suggested books we recommend in our weekly newsletter.

You can do these things to keep you lubricated, to keep you going as an actor, to keep you motivated, and to keep your skills so that you are hireable.

The second pillar is the business skills.

Now, again, in that Masterclass, I talk about which business skills you need to be concentrating on.

And in this downtime, this is the absolute best time to get ready to go because, let me tell you, I can guarantee you two things.

One, these strikes will end.

This, too, shall pass.

Two, I guarantee you this: when it happens, the floodgates will open.

So you want to be prepared not only as a warmed-up, ready-to-compete actor, but you want to have all of your materials speaking the "Language of the Agents and the Casting Directors."

So that leads me to the last pillar I want to talk to you about to work on while we have this quote-unquote break.

That would be the work on yourself. And right now, I'm doing a free month of coaching.

Free Month of Coaching

That is teaching you self-confidence and self-esteem.

This, too, shall pass.

Everything is going to be all right, but let's use this time to get ready and prepare for those damn floodgates to open.

Peggy's Improv Class

I'm just going to talk about scarcity.

What is scarcity thinking?

It's not enough. There's not enough.

There isn't enough work out there.

There isn't any work out there.

Jealousy is a type of scarcity thinking because it is not acknowledging that there is enough for everyone.

And this kind of thinking as an actor really only hurts you.

The phrase is, you take the poison and wait for somebody else to die.

And, you know, it's the same thing with scarcity thinking.

First of all, it's not true. Scarcity thinking is based in your ego thought. It's not based in universal thought. And I always talk about kind of like turning your internal dial to universe as opposed to ego.

The thing about me and my ego is that I know my ego.

Even though you think by the word ego, it would want everything good for me. I have learned over many years of studying this work and practicing it that it's actually quite the opposite.

If I need to choose between what the universe wants for me and what Peter wants, I'm going to choose the universe because I know that is the wider choice.

My ego comes from a very finite amount of thought and intelligence, and wisdom.

The universe comes from infinite wisdom, infinite abundance, infinite beauty, infinite possibilities, and infinite wisdom.

So when it comes to something put in my face, like a writer strike and a potential actor strike.

Because of that, because you know what I see as the quote-unquote reality, I must understand what it means.

Take care of myself in this plane, but also remind myself to tune my thoughts into the infinite abundance of the universe.

I'm not going to be destitute. I'm not going to be homeless. None of these things are going to happen. I won't lose all credibility in my business and the reputation I've built for over 30 years.

None of that is going to happen.

Strikes are survivable, and we can all manage what is happening in our industry today. We can manage it.

We can't control it. We can't control it. It is far beyond us as an individual for us to control these strikes, the existing one and the potential one.

But what I can do, what I can do is remind myself not to act out of scarcity.

But tune my dial in to the energy of the universe, to the infinite abundance, to the infinite possibilities, to the infinite beauty and expansion, and again, the abundance of the universe.

And use this time to create, use this time to reflect. Because isn't that better than worrying about something you don't have any control over?

Recalibrating you to Truth with a capital T.

Free Masterclass

Today we are going to talk about celebrating

The Language of Letting Go

"Take time to celebrate."

Now the funny thing is that I rarely take time to celebrate, and I need to keep doing it more and more and more because it is in the times of celebration, and it's in our resting times that we are getting prepared to do and accomplish more.

But it's so important to reward ourselves. It's one of the things I talk about in time management to reward ourselves for all our hard work.

"Celebrate your successes, your growth, your accomplishments. Celebrate you. And who you are because through celebration, we are truly loving the self. We are truly celebrating who we are."

And isn't that what we are putting out to the business? We want to put out, "Hey, I've got this great product. It's me!"

I mean, isn't that what it's all about? It's show business. Let me show you me.

It's important to have joy.

"For too long, we have been too hard on ourselves. Others have spilled negative energy, attitudes, beliefs, and pain on you."

And guess what? It had nothing to do with you.

"All along, you have always been a gift to yourself and the universe."

We teach people how to treat us.

I was working with a private client today, and she was talking to me about how she'd been really doing this work with me and how she suddenly didn't feel like she had a lot of friends.

And I said, you know what? That's kind of part of the process.

And it is odd because as you get healthier, the unhealthy people in your life do kind of seem to drift off.

And there can be that period of loneliness, but it's in that gap that we are being prepared for healthier people to come into our lives.

One of my biggest universe moments or god moments, whatever the heck you want to call it, moments happened on my 25th birthday.

I had just started really delving into this work, and I spent my birthday alone.

I told myself, well, I'm going to do something I always wanted to do. And I took myself to the New York Aquarium. And there was an exhibit of Beluga Whales.

I have always loved whales. I was always so into whales when I was a little girl, and I went to the back of the exhibit, and there was this small porthole. And I walked up to the porthole, and this whale came by me. This beluga whale came by me, and then it came, swam around the tank, and came up the second time and pressed its eye against the window of this little porthole so that me and the whale were looking at each other.

Sometimes when we celebrate who we are, there are people in our lives who don't want to celebrate us with us, and there can be that lag in between.

And for me, that day, my best friend was that whale. And I will never, ever, ever forget that moment. And it stayed with me for a long time.

My birth on that day with kind of the most unexpected creature I could have imagined.

"You are a child of God. You are beautiful. You are a delight. You are a joy. You do not have to try harder. You do not have to be better. You do not have to be perfect or be anything. Anything that you are not.

Your beauty is in you just as you are in each moment. It's time to celebrate that when you have a success when you accomplish something, enjoy it. Pause, reflect, rejoice. Too long you have a listen to the admonishments. Not to feel good about what you have done, lest you travel downward, downward to the road of arrogance.

You're not arrogant; you're just celebrating you. Celebration is a high form of praise, of gratitude to the universe for the beauty of its creation. To enjoy and celebrate the good does not mean it will be taken from you."

Oh my God, I love that sentence so much because I always thought, well, if I get too excited, then it means it's going to go away.

That's such fucking bullshit.

"To celebrate is to delight in the gift to show gratitude. Celebrate your relationships, celebrate the lessons from the past, and the love and the warmth that is there today, even if it is you giving it to you. Enjoy the beauty of others and their connection to you.

Celebrate all that is in your life. Celebrate all that is good and celebrate you."

Be your own best friend. Take yourself out to somewhere you want to be you and only you and celebrate it.