Apocalypse Video

In the second installment of Febwhaleary, we leave behind the fun loving world of Free Willy and venture to the cold climate of Newfoundland to witness the dark side of nature. For not all Orcas share the same sense of fun and need for human companionship like Willy, some…can hold a grudge. For Killer Whales the need for vengeance can be just as strong in Orcas as it can with homosapiens, as one fisherman in the 1970’s found out. With rows of razor sharp teeth, designed to tear apart their prey, along with an extensive knowledge of explosives and natural accelerants; one does not wish to be on the bad side of this deadly mammal. For when one fucks around with nature…nature has a way of fucking you back.

This…is Orca.

I’m your host, Dave, and joining me as we prepare to serve up a cold plate of vengeance are fellow cinephiles and marine biologists, Mike, Jackie, and Ryan.

Topics of discussion in this episode include a breakdown of one of the most haunting and traumatic scenes we’ve ever witnessed on the show to date; Dino De Laurentiis thumbs his nose at Spielberg as he gives us one ocean hell-beast to rule them all; and finally, we analyze the Final Destination-esque methods that the Killer Whale in Orca uses to obtain his vengeance.

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And thus concludes our dive into the vengeful side of the Killer Whale. Febwhaleary will continue next week, as we warp back to the future to save the Humpback Whale species with Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home. And yes, we promise, there will be whales here!

The wasteland can be a dangerous place…especially for those who seek rare, limited edition 4K sets. Legend has it that a store manager named Dave once went looking for the Arrow 4K version of the Friday the 13th 2009 reboot once out in Sector 5, near the old abandoned Barnes and Noble. He went out looking for some high bit rates and some nifty special features…what he got was a nasty bump on the head and a night he’d probably like to forget. ‘Cause when someone asks you if you wanna shoot the boot…you better have a strong stomach and a likin’ of Pabst Blue Ribbon, by God.

I’m your host and store manager of legend, Dave, and joining me as we watch Michael Bay bay-ify another beloved franchise are fellow cinephiles and former Crystal Lake Camp Counselors Mike and Jackie.

Topics of discussion in this episode include a breakdown of the eye rolling era of grim, gritty horror reboots; we wonder what kind of couple has sex five feet from their friends if they aren’t supposed to be swingers; and finally, Mike reveals the shocking reality that Friday the 13th and Transformers share the same cinematic universe…and it all begins with a douchebag named Trent.

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That’ll do it for this obligatory Friday the 13th episode. When Jason Voorhees returns to Apocalypse Video we’ll finally be getting around to the one that started it all (from a certain point of view) with Friday the 13th: Part 3.

Hello, and welcome to Apocalypse Video’s look at the gentle giants of the sea: Whales. All month long, we’ll be discussing everything from Orcas, to Humpback Whales, as well as a special once in a lifetime look at one of the rarest whale species on the planet.

This…is Febwhaleary.

In this first installment, we will be covering perhaps the most popular whale in the public consciousness: the Orca - otherwise known as the Killer whale. But not all Orcas behave like their infamous moniker, some are gentle giants, case in point, tonight's subject: Willy. A performer for years before his eventual debut in Hollywood, Willy is perhaps the most popular killer whale in the world. Although his true life story is not as hopeful as his motion picture alter ego…

I’m your host, Dave, and joining me on this quest to stop a power-mad Michael Ironside are fellow cinephiles and Willy fans, Mike and Ryan.

Topics of discussion in this episode include the depressing story of Keiko (aka: Willy), and why it’s never a good idea to turn a Killer Whale into a Golden Retriever; we’ll also talk about whether Michael Madsen and Michael Ironside are too menacing in this movie or not menacing enough; and finally, we’ll get into Ryan’s childhood obsession with whales and how he may have gone down a different path in life had he lived closer to a Seaworld.

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And thus concludes our look at Free Willy. Febwhaleary will continue next week, as we take a look at a whale that more embodies the ominous nature of its “killer” moniker: next week we watch the 1977 creature thriller…Orca.

Jesusary is no more…long live: Satanuary!! All month long at Apocalypse Video, we’re giving tribute to the Dark Lord by diving into the depths of Satan’s most devilish and diabolical filmography…

On the final installment of Satanuary, the Captains of the Nostromo and the Enterprise battle Ernest Borgnine and his eyeless disciples, as they attempt to stay dry and not get gooped by the face meltings of the damned in the 1975 drive-in classic….The Devil’s Rain.

I’m your host and eyeless wonder, Dave, and joining me as we bid farewell to Satanuary are fellow cinephiles and damned souls Mike, Ryan, and Jackie.

Topics of discussion in this episode include the frightening origin of the Michael Myers mask; John Travolta finds Xenu while pretending to worship Satan; and finally, we witness a fifteen minute uninterrupted goop-athon that gives Sam Raimi’s The Evil Dead a run for its money.

Be sure to rate, review and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts. You can also Like Us on Facebook, or shoot us an email at [email protected]

And thus concludes Satanuary. We bid our Dark Lord farewell as we rise from the depths of Hell into the depths of the Ocean as we enter February…or, as it will be known this year…Febwhaleary! That’s right! There will be whales here!!!

Jesusary is no more…long live: Satanuary!! All month long at Apocalypse Video, we’re giving tribute to the Dark Lord by diving into the depths of Satan’s most devilish and diabolical filmography…and that includes Belezbob's funnier side.

On this installment of Satanuary, the devil assumes the form of Elizabeth Hurley and gives incel loser, Elliot Richards, seven wishes to win the love of a woman he’s barely spoken to and desperately wants to have sex with. Prepare yourself for the film Us Weekly described as “Hell-acioulsly funny”; it’s Bedazzled (a Harold Ramis Joint).

I’m your host, Dave, and joining me are fellow cinephiles and slaves to Elizabeth Hurley’s power Mike, Jackie, and Ryan.

Topics of discussion in this episode include how Bedazzled feels like a jumbled mess of rejected SNL sketches; we endure what basically feels like the epitome of the early 2000’s comedy (replete with a deluge of gay panic jokes); and finally, we try to break down the ultimate message of the film…which I guess is that true love exists, as long as you wait around until you meet a clone of yourself that you can fall in love with…? I guess…?

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That’ll do it for this sexy, yet cringy, installment of Satanuary. When we return we’ll be closing up the hell portal that is Satanuary as we bask in the warm, face melting goop of…The Devil’s Rain.

Let’s face it, last year sucked - big time. So with that in mind we here at Apocalypse Video are pulling out all the stops and doing everything within our meager power to make this new year somewhat bearable, which is why every month in 2026 (or whatever year it is in the Wasteland…) will henceforth be known as “Oops, All Theme Months!!!”. And unlike last year, we’re not starting with the wimpy and conservative JC – no, no…we’re starting off strong with the Dark One, baby!

That’s right…Jesusary is no more…long live: Satanuary!! All month long at Apocalypse Video, we’re giving tribute to the Dark Lord by diving into the depths of Satan’s most devilish and diabolical filmography…

First up, we answer our summons and appear in court as Keanu Reeves and Al Pacino chew up the scenery in the fiendishly horny and over the top legal thriller: The Devil’s Advocate.

I’m your host and Shift Leader in the Devil’s Entertainment Division, Dave, and joining me as we try out our best Gainesville, Florida accents is fellow cinephile and Third Degree Master in Fire and Brimstone, Mike.

Topics of discussion in this episode include Keanu’s wildly entertaining and fluctuating southern accent; we salute Pacino as he absolutely goes off in a pre-Dunkachino performance; and finally, we question the merits of floor-sex and wonder why Charlize Theron with her hair up is somehow considered “dumpy” looking.

Be sure to rate, review and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts. You can also Like Us on Facebook, or shoot us an email at [email protected]

That’ll do it for the first film of Satanuary. When we return we’ll be getting silly (and sexy) with Elizabeth Hurley and Brendan Fraser as we watch the forgotten Harold Ramis comedy remake, Bedazzled.