#AskAMan

Anonymous says her marriage is toxic, she’s had enough of her husband’s antics and knows that she should end her marriage, but she’s struggling to actually leave. 

She says they have the public picture of the perfect marriage and that’s something that’s keeping her in the marriage. 

Another reason is because, despite knowing that he’ll never change, she continues to carry the hope that he’ll maybe change one day. 

She’s also struggling with idea of being single, as she doesn’t know how she’d be able to do this life thing without a partner. 

Anonymous met a guy back in 2023 and got into a relationship with him despite recognising that he’s a bit of player. 

At some point she found out that he was cheating on her with multiple women, but continued with the relationship believing that they are meant to be with each other. 

She fell pregnant and around this time found out that he was treating an STI that he didn’t tell her about it. 

There’s  also a specific lady who is her man’s sugar mama…

Anonymous has been with her now husband shortly after matriculating. They got married a couple of years after meeting and they have two children together. 

The problem in their relationship is finances. She says they don’t communicate properly when it comes to finances in their relationship and he only brings her in when he’s facing trouble financially. She adds that at some point in their relationship he seemed to have a problem with gambling. 

Their relationship is now strained and they don’t even talk anymore. She’s taking care of their home and he only contributes every now and then. 

Anonymous was with her ex-partner of many years and they have a child together. 

She ended things with him after realising that he was cheating on her with another lady who he impregnated.

She’s struggling to let go of the resentment she feels for him and she feels it’s keeping her from moving forward. 

Anonymous has been with his partner for about four years and says the first three years were easy going and the relationship was going well. 

However, in the last year things have gone cold in their relationship, and he says they fight a lot more and she doesn’t give him much attention or share her thoughts and feelings with him. 

As a result of the situation in their relationship, he started chatting to other girls for companionship. His partner found out about these chats and she now wants to end things with him.

Anonymous met a lady over a year ago, they hit off, and started dating. 

Months into the relationship he realised that she wasn’t really doing anything career wise, at which point he assisted her in finding a job but she said to him she wasn’t ready to work but would be good to go in 2026. 

Since the start of 2026 she hasn’t really looked or shown any interested in finding a job which frustrates him because he has to shoulder the financial burden in the relationship.

She’s mentioned to him that she’s not looking because she’s not well educated. However, he’s not happy with this situation. 

Anonymous has been married to her husband for twelve years and they’ve been together for about twenty years. 

They have two children together and her husband secretly fathered another child about five years ago with a woman he’s been with for about 8 years on the side. 

She found out about the child three years ago and they were able to move forward with their relationship.

She’s over it now, as her husband is “playing happy families” with their children and the other child and the other woman.

Anonymous met a guy back in 2024 while she was going through a divorce and they had a casual relationship which remained non-sexual until after her divorce was finalised. 

They continued with their friends with benefits situation until they both realised they had caught feelings and wanted something more serious with each other. 

They are now in a committed relationship, however, she feels like he’s not a good communicator, which is also a trigger for her because of an incident that happened in her past, that has left her needed constant communication. 

Anonymous recently had a baby with her partner of four years and they’ve now broken up after she felt like he wasn’t taking care of her after giving birth to their child. 

He has suggested that they continue to live with each other and raise the child together but she’s confused by that offer and doesn’t know what to do. 

She adds that she doesn’t want to be a single parent.

Anonymous met a guy in October 2021, they dated for 19 days before they got engaged. 

Just as the lobola proceedings were about to begin she fell pregnant so they put a pause on their marriage. 

The guy started cheating on her months into the relationship and says the behaviour also coincided with him reconnecting with his long-lost father who seemed to encourage his drinking and infidelity. 

They managed to work through this but he is now having an affair with another lady…