By Laura von Holt, Alex Gershuny
4.6
1515 ratings
The podcast currently has 48 episodes available.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, VIRGO!!!!!
It’s eclipse season again, but don’t worry, Virgo, because there are positive birthday vibes and good surprises coming your way!
The gals begin the episode by reminiscing about when they met Susan Miller on the streets of New York three years ago. What a time! Neither Laura nor Alex have any embezzlement to report (translation: Susan didn’t make any predictions for them last month that panned out), so they dive immediately into September’s Note, where they learn that the 2025 Astrology Zone calendar is ready! Susan also gives her readers an update on the trials and tribulations related to her recent flood and subsequent relocation.
Then it’s time for the horoscopes. There’s a lot to cover because, for better or worse, eclipse season is upon us. Susan is quick to warn us that if we don’t deal with our issues and make decisions that the eclipse will make them for us! Laura and Alex begin with Virgo’s forecast, which unfortunately seems like a mixed bag. But hang on for the second half of the month, Virgo, and you’ll see some sparkling 4-star days. Laura then explains the effects that the eclipses will have on Taurus and about all of the wonderful planetary golden triangles that will bring them good fortune. And Alex tells Scorpio that September is a time to have fun, even though last month Susan seemed certain that the Scorps were embarking upon eighteen months of sadness.
Laura and Alex discuss the following at these timestamps:
Note from Susan Miller: 7:39
Virgo: 14:32
Taurus: 24:16
Scorpio: 38:33
Share your own thoughts on Susan Miller’s Astrology Zone with us by emailing [email protected].
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HAPPY LEO SEASON!!!!
You have a lot going your way this month, Leo! Susan Miller is adamant that you make a birthday wish. Fortunately you have plenty of time to contemplate your desires because this directive was published with the horoscopes on August 1!
The episode begins with a chilling story of cybercrime, as Laura recounts how she was almost scammed into buying counterfeit Taylor Swift tickets. Happily, her great knowledge of the teachings of Astrology Zone came to the rescue! Laura also shares her Embezzlement Update, where we learn that Susan got something right.
The gals then get started on the horoscope recaps. It seems like all the signs will experience a peach of a new moon this month, but a troublesome full moon. Leo should mix and mingle and enjoy their birthday gift from the universe. And Susan herself gives Leo a birthday present by including a rather long story about her pregnancies in their forecast. Alex then tells her Scorps the good news first: exciting career opportunities and cold coins could be coming their way. But the bad news is that the loneliness they are experiencing now might not end for eighteen months. And Laura informs her Taursuses that August is a time to slow down, focus on home, and perhaps do some casual entertaining.
Laura and Alex discuss the following at these timestamps:
Embezzlement Update: 4:24
Note from Susan Miller: 9:17
Leo: 15:23
Scorpio: 26:24
Taurus: 38:33
Share your own thoughts on Susan Miller’s Astrology Zone with us by emailing [email protected].
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ATTENTION, CANCER!!!!
You’ve got a great birthday month ahead of you, so make the most of it before mischievous scamp Mercury retrogrades and ruins the fun.
The gals start this episode with a catch-up that includes Laura’s mastering of international relations and fun facts related to tennis. But the star of Susan Miller’s content this July is her note to her readers, so there is a lot of Susan info for Laura and Alex to cover. To begin, her apartment flooded, so we learn all about how she was forced to evacuate her apartment and enter the overwhelming world of New York real estate. Then, as is Susan’s way, she came down with a mysterious illness. This somehow transitions to a detailed description of the Astrology Zone calendar’s editorial process, in which we learn the names of everyone who works for Susan.
The gals then tell Cancer about the cheerful peach of a New Moon that they’re getting for their birthday. This July, Susan orders Cancer to socialize, and not just in honor of birthday month, but to get ahead in business. Get out there, Cancer, and make those professional contacts! Laura then explains to her Tauruses that they must expand the borders of their worlds, which could possibly include the import/export of ideas! And Alex recommends that the Scorps be as productive as possible before Merc retro hits in August.
Laura and Alex discuss the following at these timestamps:
Note from Susan Miller: 7:32
Cancer: 29:00
Taurus: 37:07
Scorpio: 43:04
Share your own thoughts on Susan Miller’s Astrology Zone with us by emailing [email protected].
Links:
IT’S YOUR BIRTHDAY, GEMINI!!!!
In your honor, Susan posted her horoscopes on the first day of the month. She couldn’t wait to inform you that it’s the start of your Emerald Year! Get ready for a bountiful harvest (and many more gardening metaphors).
The episode starts with a discussion of 2024’s Luckiest Day of the Year. Laura and Alex love a good Embezzlement Update, but it pales in comparison to the unprecedented event that occurred in the Astrology Zone universe this month. Due to illness, Susan was unable to write her monthly note to her readers. If that weren’t shocking enough, her editor-in-chief, one Edward Rubinstein, wrote the note on her behalf! Suffice it to say that the gals have a lot of thoughts on this shocking twist.
Alex then talks all about Susan’s forecast for Scorpio, which is chock full of practical advice. Don’t doubt your ability to manage money, Scorpio! Susan believes in you. Or at least she believes that you can ask a friend to recommend a good financial advisor. The episode finishes with Laura’s recap of Taurus’s forecast. Taurus may have passed the Emerald Year torch to Gemini, but wonderful things are still on the horizon, including money, travel, and wildflowers.
Laura and Alex discuss the following at these timestamps:
Embezzlement Update: 08:33
Note from Susan Miller: 12:55
Gemini: 19:01
Scorpio: 29:18
Taurus: 40:38
Share your own thoughts on Susan Miller’s Astrology Zone with us by emailing [email protected].
Links:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, TAURUS!!!!!
It’s Taurus season, which is a very special time at the pod because that means it’s Laura’s birthday!!! The universe is obsessed with you, Taurus, so be on the lookout for money, extra luck, and the adoration of VIPs.
Laura and Alex begin the episode with the Embezzlement Update so they can check in to see if either of them experienced the joyous aspect that Susan predicted in April. They did not, but Laura shares her tips picking up a few extra dollars in Vegas. They then recap Susan’s Note, in which she covers astrology, a flood in her apartment, and an elusive Astrology Zone newsletter that the gals hope to receive one day when Susan’s team fixes the sign-up page.
Next Laura breaks down Taurus’s magical birthday horoscope. Or as she’s calling it this month: the Laurascope! Susan promises that diamonds will rain down from the sky and a crowd of planets will sip champagne in your honor. And not only is May’s new moon a peach, but this month contains the Luckiest Day of the Year (capitalization by Susan), and Laura tells Taurus how to use this day to its fullest potential. Alex then informs her Scorps that May is all about committed partnerships, so they must ignore their loner tendencies and get out in the world and collaborate.
Laura and Alex discuss the following at these timestamps:
Embezzlement Update: 3:50
Note from Susan Miller: 7:50
Taurus: 17:20
Scorpio: 33:19
Share your own thoughts on Susan Miller’s Astrology Zone with us by emailing [email protected].
Links:
IT’S ARIES SEASON!!!
Happy birthday, Aries! It’s your time to shine and apparently to attract lots of money. So keep your eyes peeled and your wallets open this April because Susan Miller has declared you a money magnet!
There’s a lot going on in the world, so Laura and Alex begin the episode by catching up on the recent earthquake in New York and the excitement surrounding the Great American Eclipse. (The gals learned recently this is its real name and not something that Susan made up, as they suspected. But doesn’t it sound like a Susan special?!) The Embezzlement Update is up next, and boy, was Laura embezzled!!! She shares all the details of Susan’s incredible on-the-nose prediction from her March horoscope.
Susan Miller Businesswoman and Susan Miller Eclipse Expert share top billing in this month’s Note, so Susan has no choice but to tell us yet again about her essay on eclipses and how we can access it through her paid app. After a recap of Susan’s plans for April, Laura tells Taurus that the eclipse may result in happy surprises and an exciting social calendar, while Alex assures the Scorps that they are not doomed.
Laura and Alex discuss the following at these timestamps:
Embezzlement Update: 05:36
Note from Susan Miller: 09:17
Aries: 16:59
Taurus: 28:48
Scorpio: 38:39
Share your own thoughts on Susan Miller’s Astrology Zone with us by emailing [email protected].
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY, PISCES!!!!!
Susan Miller may not have written you the lengthiest forecast this year, Pisces, but it is full of exciting predictions that should ensure a festive birthday season. She lists approximately five hundred ways that money may come into your life this month (cue Laura’s pharmaceutical spokesperson voice), so there’s a good chance that your birthday present will be cold hard cash!
After a quick catch-up and an update on Susan’s posting habits, Laura explains during the Embezzlement Update that she may have been embezzled, but it’s just too early to tell. Next the gals break down Susan’s note to her readers. It’s eclipse season, but fear not! The 2024 eclipses will not be like the cruel, life-ruining eclipses of Taurus and Scorpio in 2023, and Susan takes every opportunity to invoke the trauma that Laura’s and Alex’s signs caused the world last year. The gals do not care for this guilt trip.
Next, Laura gives an update on Taurus’s Emerald Year and details all of the wonderful predictions for Taureans this March. There will be glitter, adoration, and maybe even the ability to literally heal yourself! Alex then tells the Scorps that March is all about romance. But beware Neptune’s idealistic fog! It could send your love-addled brain right to the Elvis chapel in Las Vegas and Susan believes this might not be prudent.
Laura and Alex discuss the following at these timestamps:
Embezzlement Update: 02:59
Note from Susan Miller: 07:14
Pisces: 14:06
Taurus: 24:33
Scorpio: 34:02
Share your own thoughts on Susan Miller’s Astrology Zone with us by emailing [email protected].
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IT’S YOUR TIME TO SHINE, AQUARIUS!
Laura and Alex are always happy to find themselves in the Age of Aquarius, and this year is no exception. So happy birthday to the Aquarians of the world! It’s time to use your cosmic gift certificate.
The episode begins with discussion of Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce (a.k.a. Venus and Mars!) followed by the Embezzlement Update, the pod’s newest segment, where the gals discuss which of Susan’s predictions last month came true. Then it’s time to deconstruct Susan’s February note to her readers. Susan Miller Business Woman takes center stage, although also included is an astrological prediction that applies to all the signs this month: Uranus is going to be a real pain the butt.
And, of course, Susan wouldn’t be Susan if she didn’t provide the signs with predictions and practical advice for Valentine’s Day. The gals let Aquarius know what to expect on February 14 and for the rest of their birthday month, and Alex informs her fellow Scorps that they need to hang on for better times in March. Taurus, on the other hand, is bejeweled! Laura gives everyone an update on Taurus’s Emerald Year and the shimmering glitter that Venus and Mars will bestow upon them.
Laura and Alex discuss the following at these timestamps:
Embezzlement Update: 07:29
Note from Susan Miller: 09:58
Aquarius: 16:38
Scorpio: 23:33
Taurus: 34:52
Share your own thoughts on Susan Miller’s Astrology Zone with us by emailing [email protected].
Links:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, CAPRICORN!
Welcome to Season 4! Laura and Alex are excited to jump into the new year. As is Susan Miller, who started 2024 off right by posting the horoscopes on the first day of the month!
The gals start the episode with a chat about the holidays that segues into the show’s newest segment, the Embezzlement Update, where they report which, if any, of Susan’s predictions (embezzlement-related or otherwise) in last month’s horoscope were accurate.
Then Laura and Alex turn to Susan’s note to her readers, where they learn that Susan unfortunately got Covid for the first time this past December. Less unfortunate for her readers, though, is that this signals the return of Susan Miller Epidemiologist, who has been away for far too long. In addition to more health news, Susan includes quite a bit of astrology in the Note, telling her readers what she expects for all the signs in January. We also hear from Susan Miller Businesswoman and are introduced to Susan Miller Historian!
Next the gals give a summary of Capricorn’s birthday forecast, which although brief, contains exciting predictions about love and money. Then Laura details what’s in store for Taurus. And what’s in store could be money, influence, and power! Or if that’s too much for the tired Taurus, Laura assures the listeners that manifesting naps will do just fine. Then Alex tells the Scorps to be ready this January to hire a lawyer, produce a television segment, and, most excitingly, to judge a contest.
The takeaway for everyone seems to be: take action, leave the house, and plant acorns that will grow into beautiful oak trees!
Laura and Alex discuss the following at these timestamps:
Embezzlement Update: 03:14
Note from Susan Miller: 07:41
Capricorn: 18:32
Taurus: 23:42
Scorpio: 29:21
Share your own thoughts on Susan Miller’s Astrology Zone with us by emailing [email protected].
Links:
IT’S YOUR TIME TO SHINE, SAGITTARIUS!!!!
Because it’s your birthday month and because Susan Miller is back! Just in time to tell us all what December holds. Her eyesight isn’t perfect, but it’s good enough that she was able to write the detailed horoscopes we expect and to tell us to buy her wall calendar and sign up for Discord. So all told, things have returned to normal.
The episode begins with Laura and Alex recounting the magical adventure they had together attending the Radio City Christmas Spectacular. There’s a lot more to the story but let’s just say that Alex walked away from the experience with the desire to be a Rockette, and Laura to be Santa’s mistress. The gals then follow up on one of Susan’s more unpleasant predictions from last month by asking each other: Were you embezzled?!
Happily, the December forecasts are full of holiday magic, so Laura and Alex are thrilled to tell Sagittarius about all the gifts that the planets will deliver for their birthday month. The horoscopes for Taurus and Scorpio are also joyful, although both signs should be prepared to pull the car over during Neptune’s fog.
Laura and Alex thank you so much for listening this year and wish everyone a wonderful holiday season! May the light from the baby glow-worm in the manger bring happiness and comfort to all!
Laura and Alex discuss the following at these timestamps:
Note from Susan Miller: 21:55
Sagittarius: 28:00
Taurus: 37:52
Scorpio: 48:45
Share your own thoughts on Susan Miller’s Astrology Zone with us by emailing [email protected].
Links:
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