Stories:

• Cards Against Humanity Buys Plot of Land Along Mexico-America Border to Stop Wall

Let's Talk About Sex

• Navy Pilot Draws Penis in Sky with Jet Trails
• Vibrator App Records Sex Noises Without Knowledge of User

What the Flying Sh*t?

• London Court Bans Man from Sex Because of Low IQ
• Georgia Hosts "Meet A Black Person" Event
• Man Finds Car Where He Parked it 20 Years Later

Dumb Decisons

• Two Shot in Church During Church Safety Event
• Guy Hospitalized After Shoving Padlock Up His Penis

Creature Feature

• World's Oldest Creature is a Gay Tortoise Named Jonathan

Cross-Faded

• Lifetime Supply of Alcohol Available for 11,111 Yuan on 11-11's National Single's Day

Snack Attack

• Drunk Man Attempts to Order 200 McDonald's Hash Browns After Being Refused Chicken Nuggets

What the Flying Sh*t?

• Illinois County Sheriff's Office Offers Pizza to Detainees if They Stop Sexually Assaulting Female Employees

Let's Talk About Sex

• New Miss Bum Bum Crowned, Calls for Brazilian President to Step Down (Also, Contestants Use Photo Shoot to Support Female Empowerment)

Dumb Decisions

• Guy Gets Shot in Balls at His Own Wedding

Weird Science

• Scientists Give Fish THC-edibles to See if it Improves Their Lives 

Creature Feature

• Stray Cat Straight-Up Kills a Person in Japan

Snack Attack

• KFC Releases Bath Bomb to Leave You Smelling Like the 11 Secret Herbs & Spices

Cross-Faded

• Guy Spends $10,000 on 139-Year-Old Whisky, Turns Out to Be Fake

Stories:

Weird Science

• New Trend Has Women Cleaning Their Vaginas with Cucumbers, Doctor Says Don't Do That

Creature Feature

• Kitten Born w/o a Butthole Needs Surgery

What the Flying Sh*t?

• Woman in Italy Has Rare Condition Where She Sweats Blood
• Michael Bay's Production Company Making a Live-Action Dora the Explorer

Dumb Decisions

• Guy Shoots Himself in the Dick Trying to Rob a Hot Dog Stand

Cross-Faded

• Samuel Adams Utopias Beer is Extremely Rare and Illegal in 12 States
• Florida Couple Inexplicably Gets 65 Pounds of Weed in With Their Amazon Order

Let's Talk About Sex

• The Female Condom is Perfect for Anal

Stories

• Let's Talk About Sex
  • Pole Dancing Now an Internationally Recognized Sport
  • Prison Inmate Refused Medical Help for 91-Hour Erection
• What the Flying Sh*t?
  • Man Hides in Forest for 10 Years to Get Away From Nagging Wife
  • Chinese Restaurant Offering Increasing Discount For Increasing Cup Size
• Dumb Decisions
  • Man Burn Downs Home Trying to Kill Spiders with Blowtorch
• Weird Science
  • New Study Shows Your Brain May Remain Cognizant After You Die
• Snack Attack
  • Man Arrested For Possession of Meth, Turns Out to be Donut Glaze
• Creature Feature
  • Paris Statue Will Commemorate Often-Forgotten First and Only Cat in Space

Stories:

McDonald's Szechuan Sauce Fiasco

• Let's Talk About Sex
  • Rick and Morty Porn Parody
• What the Flying Sh*t?
  • Man Lives with Corpses of His Mom and Twin Brother for Over a Year
  • Lucky Passengers Board Last Ever Flight 666 to HEL on Friday the 13th
• Dumb Decisions
  • Man Leads State Troopers on Car Chase Because it Was "On His Bucket List"
• Weird Science
  • Study Shows Who Actually Uses Flavored Condoms & Strangest Condom Flavors
• Snack Attack
  • Nicolas Cage's Face Appears on Japanese Snack Without His Consent
• Cross-Faded
  • Magic Mushrooms Offer a Brain Reboot for Depressed People

Stories:

• Cross-Faded
  • Study Shows Stoner's Top 5 Favorite Fast-Food Joints for Munchies
• What the Flying Sh*t?
  • Music Teacher Arrested for Giving Kids Flutes Contaminated with Semen
  • Toilet Paper Finally Returning to Florida Elementary School
• Let's Talk About Sex
  • British Mom Model Makes Choker Necklace from Labiaplasty
• Dumb Decisions
  • Canadian Model Attempts Eyeball Tattoo and It Goes Horribly
  • Lil Wayne Concert Cancelled After the Rapper Refuses to Go Through Standard Security Check
  • Swiss Man Receives Concerned Letter After Neighbors Mistake His Jack Daniel's Flag for that of ISIS
• Weird Science
  • FDA Tells Massachusetts Bakery "Love" Is Not An Ingredient in Granola

Stories:

• Let's Talk About Sex
  • FEMA Offers Hurricane Victims Phone Sex Number Instead of Roofing Assistance
  • Cream-Filled Penis Waffles
• Dumb Decisions
  • Burglar Caught Because He Left His Sh*t in the Victim's Toilet
  • Professional Big Trophy Hunter Gets Trampled By Elephant
• Weird Science
  • BOB's GoFundMe to Prove Earth is Flat
• Creature Feature
  • Eco-Friendly Belgian Restaurant Puts Crickets on Menu
  • Eating Bull Penis Soup in China
• Cross-Faded
  • MassRoots is Marijuana-Based Social Media

Stories

• Dumb Decisions 
  • Death Wish Coffee Recalling Beverage Over Possibility It Actually Contains Deadly Toxin

• What the Flying Sh*t?

  • Woman in Colorado Springs Who Randomly Poops in People's Yards While Out Jogging

  • Man Travels Across Country Looking For Best Penis Art/Penis Shaped Landmarks
    • Discussion: Best Penis You've Ever Seen?

• Creature Feature

  • Mutant Piglet Born with a Penis On His Forehead
    • What Animal Could Pull This Off?

• Cross-Faded

  • IPA's Give Men Boobs
  • Hallucinogen Persisting Perception Disorder Is Essentially An Acid Trip for Life
    • Awesome or Nawwsome?

• Let's Talk About Sex

  • Latest in Latex Innovation: 3 Unique New Condoms
  • Future Sex Robots Will Be So Good it Could Crumble the Fabric of Humanity

Special Guests: Coconut & Misty

Stories:

• Let's Talk About Sex
  • Ted Cruz Caught Liking Porn on Twitter
    • Mr. DP describes the porn in question
  • 60-Year-Old Man Dies While Being Bottom in Anal Sex w/ Transgender Woman
    • Story: Having anal sex
• What the Flying Sh*t?
  • Man Has Spent 1000 Hours and $70,000 Dollars Getting Tattoos Covering 90% of His Body, Including His Penis & Eyeball
    • What would you get tattooed on your penis?
  • Thieves in Michigan Rob House Solely for its $7,000 Dollar Lego Collection
    • Misty's Crazy Lego Creation
• Creature Feature
  • Venezuelan Zoo Animals Stolen for Food Amid Starvation Crisis
    • What exotic animal would you most like to eat?
• Weird Science
  • Chinese Barber Still Practicing Ancient Art of "Eyeball Shaving"
• Dumb Decisions
  • Berlin Court Upholds Citizen's Right to Fart in Public
    • European vs. American Police
• Cross-Faded
  • Drunk Tourist Becomes First Person to Swim Across Hoover Dam and Live
    • Everyone's Craziest Drunk Story

• Dumb Decisions
  • Atlanta Braves apologize for playing "Rock You Like A Hurricane" against Miami Marlins
    • Family left homeless by Hurricane Harvey arrives at their new home in Central Florida
  • Woman trapped in window after trying to retrieve poo on Tinder date
    • Mad Libs: Bad Date
• What the flying sh*t?
  • Massachusetts library asks residents to stop paying late fees in Chuck E. Cheese tokens
    • Creepy Chuck E. Cheese Commercials
  • Man murders teenage son after he discovers pictures of dad cross-dressing while eating out of a diaper filled with feces
    • How would your dad handle this and what would your reaction be?
• Cross-Faded
  • Vodka made from leftover baked goods from local food bank
    • Game: Would you drink it? (Weird vodka flavors)
• Weird Science
  • Adidas Germany launches beer and puke-repellent shoes for Oktoberfest
    • Should these shoes be mass-produced in various styles for people to wear at parties, to concerts, etc?
• Creature Feature
  • Man dumps container of over 100 bed bugs at City Center after being denied living assistance
    • What's the worst nightmare you've ever had?
• Let's Talk About Sex
  • Former stripper is now a "Sex Witch" specializing in orgasm-boosting spells
    • Create a sex spell and say what it does