Authorized Novelizations Podcast

By Authorized PodcastTV & Film

Authorized Novelizations Podcast episodes

April 13, 2023 The Goonies by James Kahn (w/ Michael Swaim)
Okay, we've got a crackerjack novelization on our hands this week. We invite Goonies superfan Michael Swaim on to discuss James Kahn's robust, liberty-taking novelization. There's more laughs, more adventure, and just in general MORE.

Check out Michael's podcast network Small Beans! : https://www.patreon.com/SmallBeans

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Next Week on Authorized: Matt Fisher reads 90s spy comedy Sneakers

2 hr 14 min
April 06, 2023 Road to Perdition by Max Allan Collins (w/ Annie Kelly)
Baby Jude Law, Baby Daniel Craig, Baby that guy who played Superman. This movie has it all!

Today on Authorized, we're joined by returning guest Annie Kelly, who tells us how Road to Perdition cemented her Jude Law adoration. We discuss whether this movie has any real dramatic gas, and how every character should have been played by Michael Shannon instead.

We also dive in on Max Allan Collins, the author of the original graphic novel, and his fraught journey in which he was hired to novelize his own work, but with suffocating restriction. Johnny, Annie, and Overbye all think the book is pretty cool. Hannah is of a different mind!

Check out Annie's podcast Vaccine: The Human Story! : https://www.patreon.com/VaccinePodcast

Check out Annie's podcast ManClan! : https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/manclan-episode-1-liver-king-vs-the-soy-boys/id1428209307?i=1000581420374

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Next Week on Authorized: Michael Swaim talks The Goonies

2 hr 13 min
March 30, 2023 Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen by Alan Dean Foster / Dan Jolley (w/ Gus Spelman)
Somehow, we found a guy who LOVES Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. This week on Authorized, we invite Gus Spelman on to defend this Writers' Strike-era actioner, which he does so admirably. One thing no one can go to bat for, however, is Alan Dean Foster's tossed off, undercooked, overwritten steamer of a novelization. Who is this book even written for, at its 200+ page length and with its SAT prep ten dollar word vocabulary? One of the hardest books to get through any of us have read.
John Goodman gets off easy by reporting in on the junior novelization by Dan Jolley, which sounds like a merciful reduction of Foster's sins.
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Next Week on Authorized: Annie Kelly walks the Road to Perdition
1 hr 58 min
March 27, 2023 BONUS: Blade of the 47 Ronin
And lo, we tempted fate, and behold, the direct-to-Netflix 47 Ronin sequel DID blow chunks. Today on a BONUS Authorized, Johnny, Hannah and Overbye discuss the plotless miasma of poor choreography that is Blade of the 47 Ronin, a film whose story is just a giant game of Steal the Bacon.

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This Thursday on Authorized: Gus Spelman makes a case for Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
1 hr 6 min
March 23, 2023 47 Ronin by Joan D. Vinge (w/ Patrick Willems)
It's John Wick 4 Day, and we're celebrating by tackling a loathed (if not forgotten) Keanu dud. Filmmaker Patrick Willems of the podcast Can't Get Enough Keanu returns to discuss 47 Ronin, a movie in which a beloved and oft-retold bit of Japanese lore gets forced through the Hollywood meat grinder. It's an ugly affair, this film.

This novelization, however, is another story. Joan D. Vinge returns and pens over 400 pages about the inner lives of these characters. Glory be to Joan! We love Joan!

Check out Patrick's Youtube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/user/patrickhwillems
Check out Patrick's movie Night of the Coconut, on Nebula! https://nebula.tv/nightofthecoconut
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This Monday on Authorized: We unsheathe the Blade of the 47 Ronin (2022)
3 hr 8 min
March 16, 2023 The Cable Guy by Harriet Grey (w/ Jon Gabrus)
The Cable Guy: a hilarious comedy with a unique flavor which seems ripe for novelizing. Well, that's not what this author thought, and she made sure this book blows chunks.
The good news is, we're joined by comedian Jon Gabrus to break down this irredeemable little brochure. We talk about how Steven is actually a huge creep, how much we love the filmography of Ben Stiller, and so much more! Chip just missed one detail in his big monologue about what people will be able to do with the internet in the future: They'll be able to listen to Authorized.
Check out Gabrus' podcast High and Mighty! https://headgum.com/high-and-mighty
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Next Week on Authorized: We welcome Patrick Willems back and make him read 47 Ronin
1 hr 55 min
March 09, 2023 Rocky IV by Sylvester Stallone (w/ Dan Jeremy Brooks)
Uh, multi-hyphenate much? Sylvester Stallone wrote all these Rocky novelizations? What can't he do? Today on Authorized, we tackle Rocky IV, from its little asides about who wants to sleep with Drago, to its deep insights into Rocky's life. We're joined by podcast host Dan Jeremy Brooks, who knows this series front and back and has a real passion for the art of the novelization.

Check out Dan's podcast Projexploitation! www.projexploitation.com

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Next Week on Authorized: We read The Cable Guy with Jon Gabrus
2 hr 5 min
March 06, 2023 Clueless: The Tertiary Tomes (w/ Sam Myers)
Did you know there’s TWENTY Clueless spin-off books? TWENTY! We invited Sam Myers back to discuss the first 4, and they suck.
We cover:
Cher Negotiates New York by Jennifer Baker (Sam)
An American Betty in Paris by Randi Reisfeld (Hannah)
Achieving Personal Perfection by H.B. Gilmour (Overbye)
Cher's Furiously Fit Workout by Randi Reisfeld (Johnny)

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Thursday on Authorized: Rocky IV by Sly Stallone himself
2 hr 9 min
March 02, 2023 Clueless by H.B. Gilmour (w/ Sam Myers)
Dusk was falling, or whatever. This week on Authorized, we have Sam Myers on to discuss the first person novelization of Amy Heckerling's Clueless. Cher's complex view of the world is masked under her fun and flighty slang, and luckily they gave us a slang dictionary in the back of this like it was A Clockwork Orange.
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Monday on Authorized: We keep Sam around to read some of the Clueless spinoff books
1 hr 41 min
February 23, 2023 Taxi Driver by Richard Elman (w/ Julio Maria Martino)
You read a book, you become the book. In the Season 4 premiere of Authorized, Overbye and Hannah are joined by filmmaker Julio Maria Martino (Country of Hotels) to discuss Richard Elman's novelization of Taxi Driver. Here we have a first person novelization that verges on experimental in structure, living completely within the grey matter of one Travis Bickle. The question of the day: Why does no one talk about this book? It's amazing.

Check out the Trailer for Julio's film! https://youtu.be/9sxmConYRgs
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Next Week on Authorized: Clueless by H.B. Gilmour
1 hr 56 min