Grant and Roger dive into a vintage Old Firm weekend and a three‑way Scottish title race, with Hearts crashing the party while a clueless Labour leader suggests Celtic and Rangers should politely cheer for each other.  From there they go big picture: Rangers’ lost menace, clubs rebranded into asset‑class logos, and Roger’s new essay asking whether football should change for Gen Z or die with its soul intact. Along the way there’s a heart‑stopping Kentucky Derby win for the first female trainer and a heartfelt tribute to the incomparable Alex Zanardi. It’s Goal/Own Goal, brought to you by Lockeroom.