Be It Till You See It

Jose Acevedo didn’t set out to be a storyteller—but life had other plans. In this insightful recap, Lesley and Brad reflect on his deep commitment to community, the unexpected lessons of fatherhood, and how honoring your roots can guide your purpose. Tune in for a powerful reminder that connection is built one story—and one step—at a time.

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected].

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• What to actually use (or substitute) when starting Pilates at home.
• Why storytelling is essential for culture and connection.
• How fatherhood reshaped Jose’s mission and mindset.
• The value of flexible goals and steady routines.
• How legacy is built through small, meaningful actions.

Episode References/Links:

• April UK Mullet Tour - https://opc.me/uk
• Spring Pilates Training - https://opc.me/events
• Pilates Studio Growth Accelerator - https://prfit.biz/accelerator
• Cambodia October 2025 Waitlist - https://crowsnestretreats.com
• Finding Arizona Website - https://findingarizonapodcast.com
• Finding Arizona Podcast - https://beitpod.com/findingarizona
• Finding Arizona YouTube - https://beitpod.com/findingarizonayoutube
• Ep. 499 wit Kristen McGuiness - https://beitpod.com/kristenmcguiness
• Ep. 5 with Amy Ledin - https://beitpod.com/amyledin

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSI

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Resources:

·        Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-g

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·        Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/

·        Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/

·        Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQ

·        Profitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/

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Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan 0:00  

I love, I love big, badass, bodacious goals. But I also think, like, don't get discouraged when you find yourself noodling in on the goal and the deadline gets moved, it doesn't mean you failed, right? 

Lesley Logan 0:13  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Lesley Logan 0:56  

Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co-host in life, Brad, and I are going to dig into the inspirational convo I had with Jose Acevedo. I wanted to say, like defining convo, or the journey, a discovery, because, I mean, like that, he's the host of Finding Arizona, and that kind of just makes sense. But anyways, he's so fabulous, and it was such a fun conversation. You were on it? Yeah. We had a great time. 

Brad Crowell 1:20  

No, no, I was on his. 

Lesley Logan 1:21  

Oh, you were on. I was like, how are you recapping? You were there, but anyways, you were on his with me. Got it. I'm here, you guys. I, we had a really good time. So you want to listen to that episode and also listen to episode Brad and I were on with Finding Arizona, but. 

Brad Crowell 1:37  

Which was his episode 435. Why do I know that? Great question, but I do.

Lesley Logan 1:43  

Wow. That is, I don't know, like 435. So you guys, before we get into Jose's amazingness. Today is April 17th 2025 and it's the International Day of Mastering Conversations That Matter. Okay. 

Brad Crowell 1:55  

That's what it is. 

Lesley Logan 1:56  

Let's all learn this together, folks. International Day of Mastering Conversations That Matter is on April 17th, I just said that, but it's okay. Important conversations are the reason why humanity stands where it is today. The ability to communicate is what separates us from all other species in the world. The advancements in medical science and technology testify to what humans are capable of. All these achievements can be traced back to an idea, an idea that was shared, discussed and debated. Important conversations have helped build empires from scratch, and the lack of them has resulted in their fall. Not just empires, but relationships tend to break apart with poor communication. It is important for the survival of the human race to constantly share ideas and bridge gaps. It is important to learn and discuss things in the past so that we have a better tomorrow. Well.

Brad Crowell 2:39  

So, I couldn't agree more. International Day of Mastering Conversations That Matter. 

Lesley Logan 2:44  

I know but we, you know what? Whoever invented this day, you better go buy a platform so that the other ideas people might want to control actually can come to the top of an algorithm. That's all I'm going to say about that. 

Brad Crowell 2:57  

No, I'm not. I'm going to say a whole lot more. So I'm frustrated that we stop sharing information as a country, especially when it comes to health and medical research. I'm frustrated that. 

Lesley Logan 3:08  

I was gonna say that our country has done a really good job sharing things they shouldn't share, so. 

Brad Crowell 3:12  

Right. They're fucking texting war plans to reporters, but they're not willing to share information among hospitals so that they can make the right flu vaccine. It's mind blowing to me. And the reality is that when we stop sharing medical information with the rest of the world with an isolationist policy, we are putting ourselves at risk, because the next pandemic, we might not have any forewarning, because since we're not sharing information with them, they're certainly not going to share information with us. 

Lesley Logan 3:38  

People have already just said they, you can't share with us anymore, because you can't trust that we'll do the right thing with it.

Brad Crowell 3:43  

Well, that's with spy stuff, but like, healthcare stuff, don't we want to know if there's something coming? Don't we want to know these things? And I think that when we wall ourselves off, when we think that we're better than the rest of the world and that we're going to be better off by pretending the rest of the world doesn't exist, we're deluding ourselves. 

Lesley Logan 3:58  

Yeah, I think every Be It listener is like nodding along. I mean, I don't think you listen to this podcast if you think people should be deported who are just here living. Anyway. 

Brad Crowell 4:07  

Well, so, so honestly, how do we fix this? Like, how do we. 

Lesley Logan 4:10  

Okay, do we have steps? 

Brad Crowell 4:12  

Yeah, we do. And the reality is, if you're in the United States with us, we live in a representative republic. We call it democracy. But the reality is, we don't get to vote every day, you and I as normal citizens, we voted for someone to go to the Congress for us, to represent us, to vote for us. And they vote all the time. They vote on things all the time on our behalf, right? And the only way that we have any power right now between the election cycles where we vote those people in or out, such as the president of the United States, or our congressperson or house of representatives person, the only way that we have power today is to call them and to make sure they know what we think. Right? It's the only power that we have until the elections come back around. And that's the best possible thing that you can do, is to make it known to the people who represent us what we care about, right? The more of us that call and contact our reps, the better, because the reality is that.

Lesley Logan 5:07  

Whether you voted for them or not, they work for you. 

Brad Crowell 5:10  

That's right, whether you voted for them or not, they work for you, and especially if you're in their district or their region, right? If you're in their state, if they're the senator, then they represent the whole state. The house also represents the whole state, but local, there's local governments as well. 

Lesley Logan 5:22  

But you, just because you didn't, if you were like, I think my person's an asshole, you should still be a nail in their, thorn on their side, a thorn on their side, a nail and a thorn on their side the same time. Also, you guys, go to city council meetings like a handful of assholes go, and you can be there to be the person. So I also wanted to say. 

Brad Crowell 5:39  

That's more local, but yes, absolutely. 

Lesley Logan 5:41  

I'm getting this woman on the pod. Just don't you worry, I'm so fucking, I'm a fan girl and a fan girl. She's so smart. I'm not lesbian, but this girl is so smart, if I was, I'd want to learn from her every day. Anyways, her podcast is called Unlearn16: Class is in Session. Her wife, she's got a wife, but I'm not trying to get in on this. But I was listening to her. 

Lesley Logan 5:59  

I don't think any of us were assuming that. Okay. 

Lesley Logan 6:01  

I was listening to her podcast, because it came up and I was like, okay, class is in session. That's how it goes. I was and I would listen to it, and I was like, oh, I kind of know about democracy stuff. No, you guys, you guys. She lays out what is a democracy. She explains it for Canada and the U.S., and she explains what are the pillars that create one? What has to be in there? To me, going on a conversation that matter, I think you have to actually know what a true democracy is, to actually have a conversation with someone who's trying to take things away. And so her episode that came out today, not today, when you're listening, a month ago, but though it's called The One Where I Make Democracy Behind the Scenes. I love her titles. They're all like that. So it's Unlearned16: Class is in Session, fuck yeah, The One Where I Make Democracy Behind the Scenes, I learned a ton, and she's a Canadian High School teacher, so clearly my teachers didn't do great job. But that's okay. I think it goes with the topic. Okay. 

Brad Crowell 6:53  

All right, moving on. 

Lesley Logan 6:54  

Go have a conversation that matters. 

Brad Crowell 6:55  

Thank you for listening. I'm gonna get off my soapbox here. Here's what we've got coming up on our travel schedule. 

Lesley Logan 7:02  

Right now. 

Brad Crowell 7:03  

You're currently, Lesley is currently gone from our house. She's recording from the stars. 

Lesley Logan 7:08  

I know, I'm like living it up in Santa Barbara.

Brad Crowell 7:11  

She's in Santa Barbara, y'all.

Lesley Logan 7:11  

I'm at the beach. I'm filming for Pilates Anytime again. Thank you to everyone at Pilates Anytime who loves my stuff. We got a bunch of classes coming at you. I'm really excited for what we have with Pilates Anytime. And when I come back a few days later and it's spring training.

Brad Crowell 7:25  

Well, yes, if you are in the U. K. or in the E.U., Lesley and I are coming in September, and we want to make sure you know about it. So go to opc.me/uk, opbc.me/uk, we're going to be teaching in the UK. It's just a short flight for those of you who are across the pond there. I mean, the channel, really. 

Lesley Logan 7:44  

Which pond? 

Brad Crowell 7:45  

Yeah, the channel. 

Lesley Logan 7:46  

You know, people on the East Coast to (inaudible) that is the pond. And also, it is so easy for you. We're doing double.

Brad Crowell 7:54  

Yeah, six hours, but anyway, y'all should come join us. We don't get there very often, and we're really fired up to be coming back. We're going to be in Leeds and in Essex, and it's gonna be awesome. So come join us on the Mullet Tour, opc.me/uk, and then at the end of this month, Spring Training. That's OPC's Spring Training. It's our first ever annual event for Spring Training. And what is Spring Training?

Lesley Logan 8:17  

So, Spring Training is kind of like how baseball has a couple weeks of playing each other, and it doesn't really matter. So. 

Brad Crowell 8:23  

Preseason, baby. 

Lesley Logan 8:24  

Preseason. So this is like a Pilates week of spring training. And the theme this week for this one is The Push-Up. And so we're planking, and we're talking about it, but all the classes are going to be around building up your push-up, which, by the way, Joe put at the end of the mat order. So,why? You could stand up and walk away from your practice and be really awesome and top. So it's really cool. Everything's going to lead gonna lead to that. You don't have to be a Pilates enthusiast to even join us. There's a mat ticket, so meaning you just go to the mat classes, because that's all you have access to, is some room on your floor. And then there's an all access ticket, which gets you the 10 classes. And that will be mat, reformer, tower, Cadillac, chair. Obviously, if you only have a reformer or mat, you still want the all access that's gonna be at the six, the price is so cheap, you won't, you don't even need to worry that you don't have the other pieces of equipment. 

Brad Crowell 9:08  

But here's what you do want. We're gonna make it even more reasonable if you're on the waitlist so that you can get that really bird discount. So go to opc.me/events, opc.me/events, come join us. It's gonna be a heck of a party. We're doing that this year instead of Summer Camp, okay? 

Lesley Logan 9:26  

Because we're doing summer tours and winter tours, and we needed a different season. 

Brad Crowell 9:30  

Yeah, we wanted a different season. So, if you are a Pilates business owner in any way, meaning you're taking money from anyone for any reason, whether that's in your home or in the park, or you have a studio. If you are the one that's actually taking the money from a client, you're technically a business owner. So come join us for a free webinar where we're gonna help support you with the growth of that business. We're gonna help you understand, how do I get more clients? How do I raise my rates? How does it all work? Like, how do we actually make this happen? This is for brand new people. It's also for people who've had like a studio for 20 years with a major team, because we kind of just stumble our way through this. There wasn't anybody guiding us. And Lesley and I have had the chance over the past seven years to stand alongside more than 2500 business owners, just like you, and go through the mud with them, try to figure out the problems that they're experiencing, problem clients or problem lease holders, or my insurance or my marketing is terrible. I don't have any people coming in. My phone stopped ringing. My website isn't bringing clients. All these kinds of things. We've had the opportunity to be there right alongside people in trenches, and from that, we've pulled three major secrets that we want to share with you. So come join me for this free webinar. Go to prfit.biz/accelerator. That's profit without the O dot B-I-Z slash accelerator. And finally.

Lesley Logan 10:50  

We're going to Cambodia in October, and we want you to come. Do not pass go. Just go straight to crowsnestretreats.com and snag your spot. Stay at our house, do Pilates with us, go see the temples of Ankor and all the other ones that are surrounding it that most people don't see. They fly all the way there and they don't see it. They just go on by. They don't even see it. We're gonna take you there. And we're gonna go to Lotus Farm and do all these different things.

Brad Crowell 11:10  

Actually, this upcoming one, y'all, we have a new temple that, that's not new for them, but a new one for Lesley and I. It's a new temple they built last week. 

Brad Crowell 11:19  

New thousand-year-old temple. 

Brad Crowell 11:21  

Lesley and I've never been to this temple, and I was, we were driving by it in our retreat earlier this year, and I asked our tour guide, like, hey, what's the story with this temple? How come we always skip it? And she said, we just run out of time. But let's make this a priority. So in October, this upcoming October, we're going to be adding one more temple to the list that Lesley and I haven't even visited. I'm very excited. I'm like, super, super excited about it. It's gonna be amazing. Go to crowsnestretreats.com crowsnestretreats.com and make your deposit today, right now, to save your spot, because space is limited. 

Lesley Logan 11:54  

Okay, we gotta get into the interview with Jose, but before that, we have an audience question, don't we, Brad? 

Brad Crowell 11:59  

Yes. Ilikecats123BB from YouTube asks, hey, do I need any equipment for the mat Pilates classes on OPC other than the mat?

Lesley Logan 12:11  

I love this question, because I think it's really easy to think, oh my God, I'm gonna have to have all these different things to get started in Pilates. Most of the props that someone could use in a Pilates mat class you can use from your house. So I even create it for the accessories deck. So technically, no, you can do mat Pilates without anything. Joe created it. So you just need you and your mat. And if you want to invest in your Pilates practice, like the mat is where I'm a, with the OPC episode that's coming out, everyone's like, I'm a mat rat. I'm like, okay, we need to come up with a different animal. I don't want to be a mat rat, but like, we were all like, I'm a mat rat. I only love the mat. So anyway, if that's who you are, you might want to invest eventually in a Contrology mat with handles and a strap, because it does change your practice, especially for the advanced exercises. But if you're never going overhead, you don't need to make that investment. So you technically don't need anything. However, one pound weights, a squishy ball, like a fitness ball, you let the air out of in a magic circle, and a heavy duty TheraBand, those things. 

Brad Crowell 13:08  

How about a block? 

Lesley Logan 13:10  

Ah, no, the squishy ball.

Brad Crowell 13:12  

Squishy ball instead of block. 

Lesley Logan 13:13  

It's not yoga. 

Brad Crowell 13:14  

Got it. 

Lesley Logan 13:14  

Yeah. No. You use the squishy ball because you'd put the block between your ankles, and it's not gonna be as fun as a squishy ball. They just squish, it would be really great. So. 

Brad Crowell 13:21  

But what if you don't have one pound weights? 

Lesley Logan 13:23  

You can use water bottles. 

Brad Crowell 13:24  

What? Fill it with water? 

Lesley Logan 13:26  

And if you don't have.

Brad Crowell 13:27  

Or like beans? 

Lesley Logan 13:29  

You can use beans, just make sure the same beans, you know, like.  

Brad Crowell 13:31  

I got tomato in here, I got apple seeds in here. 

Lesley Logan 13:32  

I had a client using two beers, you know, two cans of beers. And I was like, just put it back in the fridge after you're done. You're not gonna want to open those up. 

Brad Crowell 13:39  

That's brilliant. 

Lesley Logan 13:39  

Yeah, just make sure they're the same product, so that the weight of them is the same. But one pound is what we're going for. If you don't have a TheraBand, you can use an old pair of leggings. If you don't have a squishy ball, you can use a couch cushion or a dog's toy, kid's toy. Your kids probably have a ball that you could let some air out of. You know, a magic circle. That's the harder one. You kind of do have to buy that, but there's so many cheap ones now it's pretty easy to grab one of those. 

Brad Crowell 14:02  

Yeah, totally. Well, awesome. Great question, Ilikecats. 

Lesley Logan 14:05  

By the way, if you go to onlinepilatesclasses.com you can join OPC for 40 days for $40 and guess what? You can experience several weeks of mat classes of ours. You can ask questions. You can send in a video of you doing a mat exercise, and I'll give you feedback on your form.

Brad Crowell 14:18  

Okay, I just want to take a super quick pause, and I want to call this out. There is no other platform on the Internet where you can submit a specific video of you saying what am I doing here, am I doing it right, and get feedback from certified Pilates instructors. There's no other place online, okay? So OPC has something that is magical that not enough people take advantage of. So come join OPC, and then if you're struggling with an exercise, no problem. We are here to support you. We excludes me. I'm not a certified Pilates instructor. 

Lesley Logan 14:53  

And I give you like other things that you can do. I'm like, oh, go grab this and go do it like this. And so you just have more homework. It's really like having a private session for nothing, you pay nothing. You just be a member.

Brad Crowell 15:04  

Well, stick around. We're gonna be right back. We're gonna dig into this fantastic convo we had with Jose Acevedo and Finding Arizona. BRB. 

Brad Crowell 15:13  

All right, welcome back. Let's talk about Jose Acevedo. Jose is the host of finding Arizona, a podcast spotlighting entrepreneurs, creators and leaders, shaping Arizona's local landscape. Driven by a genuine love for connection and community, he provides guests with a welcoming platform to share their journeys in their own words. What began as a screen printing passion project ultimately drew Jose into podcasting where he found his true calling, giving people space to tell their stories. Today, he and his wife Britt run the show together, making Finding Arizona a thriving hub for inspiration and local voices. And funny enough, Lesley and I had the opportunity to be interviewed on that podcast, even though we don't live in Arizona, but we actually go to Arizona pretty regularly, a couple times a year, usually. That's where we got a chance to meet them. We were down there speaking at an event. Britt and Jose were also speaking at the same event, and we had a chance to just chit-chat with them off stage. And it was great. And that's how we connected with them. Yeah, Finding Arizona is cool because it's, it really grew organically. And I think. 

Lesley Logan 16:15  

I also think what a great if you're just going to visit Arizona, what a great podcast to go listen to. You can go through the different, they have so many episodes, you can search through it. They're a wealth of knowledge of different local businesses and entrepreneurs and really supportive. And I think that's what makes you want to go to a place. It's like when you can know the insiders spaces to go, the coffee shops, the pizza restaurants, all that kind of stuff, like, who's doing what? Just think it's really, really impressive. I love that our conversation with Jose, I think he's, first of all, the nicest person. I think he might be the softest, but I don't mean soft like he doesn't have about, I just mean like, his energy is soft, his voice is soft, like, he's just endearing. I really enjoy him. So anyways, he talked about storytelling, and he said, like, what it can do for society and culture that has been on this earth for so long and has thrived just from hearing these stories and using that as a religion, and that kind of goes into the day that we're kind of celebrating right now, the conversations that matter, so, good job, Brad. And he talked a little bit about his grandfather, an elder in the Hopi community, so we're First Nation, and he got to, in like that community, from what I understand about people who are native, and like they're grandkids of a native, everyone talks about the storytelling, and they learn so much through storytelling. And so I think it's really cool that Jose learned that from his grandfather and from his culture and from his community, and then is using that for other people. So I really enjoyed, I really enjoyed him talking about the importance of storytelling and (inaudible).

Brad Crowell 17:44  

He talked about how it shapes religion and culture and society, and how he was really impacted by that. And then. 

Lesley Logan 17:51  

I think that's like, one of the things that I wanted to even have him on is not just, let's talk about Finding Arizona, but how do you get into being this person and like that be it till you see it, and it's like, well, I'm starting with storytelling. I wanted to tell the stories. And I just think that that's like, you know, most of us are wondering, like, what we could do at this point, and you could, you could tell stories about experience that have happened in your life and the lives before you. And that's how we learn, and that's how we keep, that's how we keep repeating the past.

Brad Crowell 18:14  

Yeah, it's how we remember the past too. I mean, it's how you do everything all the way up to sell. It's how you sell these stories. You know, people are captivated by stories. It's why the movie industry is so powerful and big and huge, and podcasts are, you know, like even happening, right? It's all about storytelling. It's fun to see that his excitement for storytelling shaped who he's become today and what he does today. So I really loved where you started talking about fatherhood. He said fatherhood has changed a lot about how I see the world, how I perceive the world, how I go about the world. He said becoming a father shifted his entire perspective on life and his purpose. He wants his son to grow up seeing a world filled with opportunity, with kindness and meaningful conversations. And he shared a story where he said podcasting has affected his family in the perception of even his son is now like, are you gonna go have a conversation? Are you gonna go have a podcast now? You know, and his son's like, three, and so it's helping him share this concept of storytelling with his son, and his son gets to see how much his dad loves to do this and all this kind of stuff. And Jose's approach to work and life has been influenced by this idea of setting a positive example, right? Because now he's intentionally meeting people he doesn't know. He's asking questions, he's being curious, he's demonstrating all these things. Rather than chasing success for personal gain, he sees his work as a way to build a legacy for his son, and he said he wanted him to know that there are good people out there and there's a community that will back him. 

Lesley Logan 19:47  

I mean, we've talked about this before with other women on this show, like we talked about it with Kristen, the episode, I think 500, 501 it's so good for your kids to see you in the world doing the thing that you love, because it lets them know what's possible, but also, like, they do learn from it, they do pick it up, right? Amy Ledine said in her episode five, actions are caught not taught, and so I think it's just really cool. I love that he picked that up and he shared that with everyone. 

Brad Crowell 20:13  

Yeah, well, stick around. We'll be right back. We're gonna dig into Be It Action Items that Jose shared and very heartfelt, so we'll be right back. 

Brad Crowell 20:22  

All right. So finally, let's talk about those Be It Action Items. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your convo with Jose Acevedo? He said t,ry your best to set a big goal, but also make sure that you're taking those routines that are going to help you achieve that big goal, right? Do small steps forward. Also, you have to allow yourself for your goal to shift over time and move, but along the way, you still have to be taking steps, right? Here's a good example. We set a goal to take our physical products and sell them in another country, right? And at first it was like, oh, we have this opportunity. We should do this right now. We gotta go, go, go, go, go, go, go. You know. And someone on our team was like, hey, wait a minute. We have a lot of other things going on. We probably could pull this off. However, what do we do with these other things? Should we be back burning them? And I was like, oh, wait, wait a minute, you know, is it really necessary for us to go, go, go, go, go right now with this thing, or can we delay that launch of that initiative in a time where the team can handle the workload, the marketing calendar is a little more open, we can have a better conversation about it with our customers, and so it still allows us to go after that big goal, but just in a different way. 

Lesley Logan 21:38  

And also we can adjust the routines to make sure that that goal happens, and then talking about it, we actually got to explore like, well, is there another way to achieve this goal, to test the goal, to even experiment with it. So I love big, badass, bodacious goals. BHAGs. 

Brad Crowell 21:53  

Forgot about those. 

Lesley Logan 21:54  

Forgot about the episode number, but it's a great one. But I also think, like, don't get discouraged when you find yourself noodling in on the goal and the deadline gets moved, it doesn't mean you failed, right? It didn't mean it. So I love that. I love it. Jose mentioned a life responds to effort. He said, if you look back on the little steps you're taking, you'll actually see that you're providing yourself the opportunity to move forward. And so if you're not making an effort, you're not moving anywhere. You're kind of stagnant. But when you make little, tiny steps, even if, for this particular goal that Brad is talking about, some of the steps are like literally doing nothing for a couple of weeks, like a conversation. I'm having a conversation. But as long as we take those little steps, it's like peeling an onion back. We get to another layer of working towards that goal, very different than going, okay, well, I love this goal. It's gonna happen in September, and then not talking about it again for until August, that would be stagnation, and the goal isn't going to move forward in September because we didn't take the little steps along the way. So I really think that's really great. I think whenever I talk about habits, it's always like tiny habits works, and a lot of us are this all or nothing people. If I'm not doing everything toward making this goal happen, then I'm doing nothing. That's not how it goes. So, anyways. 

Brad Crowell 22:59  

That's not how it goes. 

Lesley Logan 23:00  

I'm Lesley Logan. 

Brad Crowell 23:01  

And I'm Brad Crowell. 

Lesley Logan 23:01  

Thank you so much for listening today. Thank you, Jose, for being on our episode, our show. You're so wonderful. I hope to run into you in Arizona when we're there for summer tour. You guys, yep, cat's out of the bag. We're gonna, we're probably gonna start our summer tour in Arizona. That's the goal. So, thank you, and you know what to do with this episode. Share this with a friend who needs to hear it. Go listen to a bunch of episodes we just talked about on this one episode. And until next time, Be It Till You See It. 

Brad Crowell 23:25  

Bye for now.

Lesley Logan 23:27  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.

Brad Crowell 24:10  

It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan 24:15  

It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.

Brad Crowell 24:19  

Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan 24:26  

Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.

Brad Crowell 24:29  

Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.

In this heartfelt conversation, Lesley Logan sits down with Jose Acevedo of Finding Arizona to explore how he’s spent the last ten years building a podcast rooted in storytelling, culture, and connection—without ever losing sight of the people who matter most. From learning to stay consistent through baby steps to collaborating with his wife and finding deeper meaning through fatherhood, Jose shares the real behind-the-scenes of growing a creative life that feels honest and whole.

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] mailto:[email protected].

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.

In this episode you will learn about:

• How to stay consistent by breaking goals into small steps.
• Ways to protect your passion project from burnout.
• How to balance creative work with parenting and partnership.
• Why storytelling connects us to purpose and builds legacy.
• When to wait—and why not rushing your creative dream can keep it joyful.

Episode References/Links:

• Finding Arizona Website - https://findingarizonapodcast.com
• Finding Arizona Podcast - https://beitpod.com/findingarizona
• Finding Arizona YouTube - https://beitpod.com/findingarizonayoutube
• Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert - https://a.co/d/1ze2Db3

Guest Bio:

Jose Acevedo is the host and creator of Finding Arizona, a podcast dedicated to spotlighting the people and businesses that make Arizona a vibrant, ever-evolving community. With over a decade of podcasting experience, Jose has interviewed hundreds of local entrepreneurs, creatives, and changemakers, capturing the heart of their stories through authentic, thoughtful conversation. His background in landscape architecture gives him a unique approach to storytelling—one rooted in structure, curiosity, and connection.

What began as a solo passion project has since grown into a collaborative family endeavor. Alongside his wife and producer, Brittany Acevedo, Jose has transformed Finding Arizona into a full-fledged media brand. Together, they co-founded The Found House, a creative production studio offering podcast and video services to local businesses and aspiring creators. Whether behind the mic or in the community, Jose’s mission is to amplify local voices, support meaningful work, and create a legacy of love and purpose for their son, Atlas.

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Episode Transcript:

Jose Acevedo 0:00  

My motivation was the podcast. It's like, I love this thing. It makes me feel good. I get passion from, I get creativity from it and that was my motivation. That was it. It's like having the next conversation.

Lesley Logan 0:13  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Lesley Logan 0:56  

Hi, Be It babe. Okay, this was such a fun interview to do. I had the pleasure of meeting our guest and his wife when Brad and I were at this, we're invited to this thing that I'm gonna not, I'm not gonna lie, we're invited to this thing. You probably heard us talk about it back around the April, May time, and we're like, how do we get invited to do this? Like, what are we doing here? We're not even experts in this area, and we had to Be It Till We See It in that space in the moment, and that's when we met Jose and Britt and they're the podcast hosts of Finding Arizona. Brad and I had the pleasure of being on their podcast. Yes, Brad, that our Brad was on a podcast. You guys, he is a performer, and we hide him behind a camera, but we really shouldn't, because he's so amazing. So anyways, I am super excited for you to hear Jose and I talk about podcasting, about starting something new, so you don't have to, even you don't turn this off if you're like, I never run a podcast. I think it's really cool to hear how people come up with ideas and then see yourself in that story. So we talk about starting a podcast, what it's like to start something that we have no accountability around, we have to create it ourselves. So if you're someone who has a hard time with that, like, hearing the story, and then also, we talk a lot about goal setting and working with your partner and kiddos and what's next. So this is just a really, I feel like you probably are gonna feel like you're having coffee with Jose and I. So here is the host of Finding Arizona, Jose Acevedo. 

Lesley Logan 2:21  

All right, Be It babe. This is fun. It's always fun for me when I get to talk to a fellow podcaster, but it's really fun when I really know that podcaster and we have a great story and we have a great vibe. Jose Acevedo, you are our guest today. You are the host of Finding Arizona. And, you guys, don't worry if you don't know where Arizona is, we're gonna talk more of than just Arizona today. But can you tell us who you are and what you rock at?

Jose Acevedo 2:44  

Yeah, my name is Jose Acevedo. I am a podcaster, and I'm also, like, a fan of you, Lesley. Thank you so much for having me, and I'm just again, I'm a true cheerleader for the locals here who are doing what they love to do their passion projects, everything in between, from nonprofit to high CEOs in the corporate areas. We want to get to know them, their story and how they come into the world, and how they journey across and make an effort to be a community member here in Arizona. 

Lesley Logan 3:14  

So I feel like you are the greatest cheerleader, like you have curiosity. You're excited about what people are doing, and you want to share their stories, is that something that you went to school for, is that something you've always done? You don't even do in a podcast but everybody else's stuff, like, where did that come from? 

Jose Acevedo 3:29  

Yeah, so I spent a bit of my life on the East Coast, and that's where my father and my mother took me to go really early on in my childhood to really kind of give me an opportunity. A. they wanted to get out of the heat of Arizona, but B. they wanted to move to other places where their children could learn and grow and kind of get a unique sense of the world. And then when I moved again for the second time, and this was a very significant point in my life, I was going away from being an adolescent to a kind of a teenager and into the kind of adulthood. And we moved back to my mom's Indian Reservation, and that is near the four corners here in Arizona. It's the Hopi Reservation, and I knew very little, to almost nothing, about my heritage and my Hopi culture. And so that was a very big, pivotal learning point about who I am as an individual, who I want to be as a man in the future. And the biggest kind of teacher in that was my grandfather, who was an elder in the community, who held a lot of stories, and who also really loved storytelling. And that was really kind of that moment of like, really crux of getting to understand what storytelling meant and what its importance was, what it can do for a society and a culture that has been on this earth for so long and has thrived just from hearing these stories and using that as a religion. And so for me, I had to very much dive deep into, you know, these different types of elements of storytelling, but how they also relate to my own life. And it was hard. It was definitely something very significant where I pushed back on it at points. I definitely had my moments of, like, teen angst and those types of things, but I also learned a lot about who I am and who my people are and what I want to give back into this world and give back into society and culture. So that was a really big point in my life, of like, learning about who I am and who my culture was. Then I came down to Phoenix and went to college, and really kind of stumbled upon podcasting as kind of this new wave of having a dialog and having conversation and actually storytelling to the masses, but also having these intimate conversations with individuals. So really, how it turned out to be what it is today is I was having conversations with business owners about their business through screen printing. I was screen printing T-shirts for these different owners, and I would just have a really fun time having these conversations and really getting to, like, go back and forth with them, getting to know them and what they're about and all these things. And they seem to really enjoy it. I'd get comments like, Oh, I really love this conversation. Thank you for having with me. Thank you for showing interest. Oh, you should be a news reporter, or you should be on the radio. All these types of compliments. And really, it dawned on me, when I was screen printing their shirts and listening to other podcasts that I'm like, really enjoying of like, oh, I should just do this. This has always been fun for me to listen to. I should at least attempt to do these conversations, to record them. So that that kind of snowballed into had to learn how to record, had to learn how to edit, had to learn how to do a website, how to like, upload them and just create this thing that I thought was cool that now has now become a big part of my life and a big part of my family's life. My wife got involved by meeting me, and I had to tell her, can't really go out on dates on weekends, because I'm doing this thing, recording and editing and all these things. And she was like, oh, I love podcasts. Let me listen to it. And so that has now turned into her becoming my producer. And now my son has just been born three years ago during the pandemic, and we were doing a lot of zoom calls, and now he knows that when Dada goes to work, it's like a lot of the times it's podcasting. So he's like, Dada, you go do podcasts? And it's just been really that thing that has affected me on a personal level, but me on a grander scale of legacy.

Lesley Logan 7:45  

I mean, and you've been doing this for 10 years, Finding Arizona, so like, y'all, we've been only podcasting for about three and a half years at this point. Podcasting has been around for a really long time, but so few people knew how to find the app on their phone and knew what it was and what I just, thank you for sharing the journey, because it's so cool you were already doing something, and then people were like, this is really cool you do this. And so you took it, and I, so many people are like, how did you come with this idea? How did you come with this idea? Y'all listen to what people are saying you're really great at, or complimenting you on, because that's what they think you're great at. And it becomes, it's so easy and natural for you, you don't see it as an opportunity or something that's unique, because it's natural to you. But what a cool gig. I love it. And also, the people are already coming to you. So you're like, what is this shirt for this automobile thing? How did they do it? I love that also, thank you for sharing your show about your grandfather. I think there's a book called Sapiens, and I didn't read the whole thing, you guys, it's really long. I kept it. I haven't given it away because I swear to pick it up. But what they say is that humans actually stayed in existence because of storytelling, and I do think that, you know, the Native Americans have really shown us that storytelling is really how we keep, we understand what happened in our past. We understand we're going to like, we understand things on a bigger level than just us as humans and I think it's so beautiful. So thank you for sharing all of that. 

Jose Acevedo 9:10  

Of course.

Lesley Logan 9:10  

Okay, you had to learn all these things to be a podcaster. You all who are trying to make something new happen your life, whenever we say podcast and you can insert what you are doing, trying to be. What was it like having the first interview? Because you already were good at it, because you'd ask people question, but then you had to, like, hit record. Were you shaking in your boots? Did it feel easy? Did you re-record it? Tell us about it.

Jose Acevedo 9:32  

So I think you're absolutely right when it comes to these very, we had this conversation on my podcast and just off air, where I feel sometimes I'm like, I'm so nervous and flustered because I'm such a fan of people who come on our show, because we do research about these people, and we're like, oh, they're so cool. They're like, this and that. And so I get nervous just because I have this excitement about me. So yes, my very first episode where I said to myself, yes, I want to record. I want to do this. I want to make it a thing. I actually did it with my boss, like of the screen printing shop, because I felt like A. we had a great dynamic. We were just really fun and chit-chatty with each other. And B. I felt like all of his stories were so funny and so like, dynamic and filled with all of these intrigue and just the way he said things was just so funny to me. And it was, yeah, it was exciting to me to share what he was about. But again, it was like, so nerve wracking, because I didn't know if this was gonna work, or I didn't know if any of my equipment was done right, or if I was like, I'm just shooting myself in the foot. We might have to record and other things, and I was so nervous, and really I just wanted it to be a fun situation, which it was. It was so much fun, and I really look back on it, and was like, oh my gosh, so he was barely paying attention to he's working on other shirts. And I was like, having this conversation while we're interviewing. He was so great, though, because he could do that, and then still have the conversation and throw in the quits, throw in the bits, throw in the funny. 

Lesley Logan 11:05  

It probably made him feel even more comfortable, because he wasn't like, sitting down and professionally recording.

Jose Acevedo 11:10  

Yeah, his thing. And it was just me saying, hey, can I record this? And then it turned into, I like the way that this felt. I like the feeling of it. I love, was it so great? That was like, did I think it was going to be this Pulitzer Prize winning interview thing? No, but I love the way it felt. I love the way it turned out. And I was like, maybe let's try it again, but let's sit down with someone who's not so busy. It's like someone who's like, a little bit more attentive and paying attention to me in my conversation with them, and it would just go from one client to the next, and I was like, oh, there's a way to like, then you start to pick out like, oh, there's a way to ask this question, or there's a way to steer them into this one area, or they draw their guard down when after the half hour mark. So I should get more personal questions towards the end there. And so if you really learn the dynamics of a conversation and through so much of doing it repetitively and doing the work over and over again.

Lesley Logan 12:13  

You, you know, that is true. It's also like you're never going to be 10 years version of you versus one year, like, you can't learn the 100 times experience until you've done it 100 times. Like, it's just got to happen. We have to have grace with ourselves. And also, it is true, the more you do it, the more you realize who are fun people to interview. What are the qualities? That person has a great story, but they're not a really good interview. So if we're having a hard time having a conversation, it's not going to go well. Versus, when do I ask the questions that are more personal, that do take more vulnerability? Some people, you know, when you podcast, a lot like we do, I can get vulnerable on an episode pretty early on, because I know what. I know that I can share. I know how it usually goes. But not everyone's like that. Some people are amazing experts, and they do a few podcasts. And so we have to kind of understand when the best time is to to bring things out. I want to know because you started this on your own, and you were also like, let me see how this goes. So how did you hold yourself accountable to releasing the episodes? Because the thing about anything is you have to be consistent, and especially at the time when podcasting wasn't really big, you know, how did you choose to be consistent with something you didn't know what it would be yet?

Jose Acevedo 13:27  

So, yeah, I, again, I think it goes back to, I think one of the early s tarts in my beginning was like goal setting, like, how do I want this to be a thing, or how do I want this to come out. And so one of the very first conversations that I had was, do I want this to be a weekly? Do I want this to be monthly? Do I want this to be a series? And, you know, how do I want to put out this series? And so I just really kind of more approached it from, uh, that kind of goal setting. Let's start off slow. Let's do it a monthly or let's, you know, I think it was monthly, in the very first beginning of, like, I'm going to have these deep conversations for more than an hour or an hour long, and really hone in on the individual and have those deep realm conversations. And then once I had a few underneath my belt, I really started to say, okay, I think I can push this even further. And, like, really, after the first year, I was like, okay, let's go to every two weeks, like a biweekly. Then it came to like, oh, I am really getting emails from a lot of places that wanted to be on the show or was showing interest. And I was like, okay, well, now I have a lot of interest. And I also, at that point, I started, you know, having someone follow, do the pictures and help me out a little bit. And so I was like, okay, I can do this. I can make this a weekly thing. And so I pushed myself even further to make it a weekly podcast and have these really fun conversations. And also, then we got to some really fun goal setting there, it was like, there was a month that was just filled with farmers, and when we started to really push the envelope on some of these ideas, and had some fun throughout the years that we've been doing it, what, how does this podcast work? Or how does it look like? What do people find interest in? Or what are some of the things that are really pushing the envelope of like how this community works here in Arizona or here in Phoenix particularly, so, it was really kind of listening to the audience, and also goal setting for myself is really what kept me going. And because I had such an intrigue on not only the people who were coming onto the podcast, but an intrigue in making this a business, I think it was kind of easier to say, okay, these are the goals. This is how I want to approach it. This is how I want it to come out. This is how I want it to be seen. And how do I make sure that I get these? Well, it's baby steps. Okay, first you get the yes from the person, then you schedule them, and then do the conversation, and then you set a date of, like, when they're going to come out. And then you make sure you edit in that time frame. It's those little baby steps that'll move you forward and move the the needle here and there. And so it was just, again, one part my my end of like, goal setting and listening to the audience. But two, make sure that you write down your goals and push yourself to reach those goals and make sure that it comes out. 

Lesley Logan 13:28  

Yeah, I love that you mentioned the baby steps, because I think that's where people get a goal set. Then they don't break it down, the baby actions, and then it just feels overwhelming to do. And then they think they need motivation, which is the biggest lie, because that's inconsistent, so. 

Jose Acevedo 16:24  

Yeah, my motivation was the podcast. I love this thing. It makes me feel good. I get passion from, I get creativity from it. And that was my motivation. That was it. It was like having the next conversation. 

Lesley Logan 16:55  

So, do you podcast full time? This is your job now, or do you have other things to do? 

Jose Acevedo 16:59  

I'll be honest. No, this isn't my full time gig, but it feels like a second job or more, but I'll be honest, I, when the pandemic hit, I was working with a landscape architecture firm, and that's what I went to school for, is landscape architecture, and I had a real choice, because we were getting a lot of intrigue in the podcast. But what happened was Brittany got pregnant, and it was the pandemic. She was actually coming out of a job in the healthcare system, and we were really worried, because she would hear horror stories from the healthcare about the pandemic and about people suffering through this thing. 

Lesley Logan 17:40  

Or our healthcare workers were on the front line, and we didn't really have a lot of support for them. We still don't. That didn't change. 

Jose Acevedo 17:48  

And so for me, I was like, oh man, I'm bringing this new life into the world. I need to figure out a way to make sure that he's healthy. And so I took a job at a bigger firm that would allow me to work from home and be with him, but also give me health insurance. And really, I like to say it's I'm not afraid to let go of that job right now to move into podcasting full time. But for the time being, my son is safe, my family's healthy, and we are still working consistently on this podcast, and I have, it hasn't worn on me. It hasn't made me feel tired. I just love what I do, and if I can do this continuously, the way that we have been, I'm okay with that. We're at that pivotal point too. It's like, which one of us is going to let go of their job to go full time with this podcast? And I don't know, we still have this conversation, and I'll be honest, like, all the time, like, who's going to do it? What are we going to do? And we just kind of look at each other and we're like, it's a good problem to have, yeah, but we're still at a standstill. We're still waiting. I think we have a goal set. I think that we have clientele, and once we reach that number of clientele that will allow us to let go of one of the jobs that we work, then we'll move into more full time. And I think that's a good, again, goal setting. Types of things where it's like baby steps, we have an actual number, and once we hit that, then that'll be the key to unlock the door of full time work. And working that podcast full time. 

Lesley Logan 19:22  

Thank you. And also it's, here's the thing. These are all things we have to think about. It's really funny when people know that I'm on YouTube, they're like, oh, you must make so much on YouTube. I'm like, not everyone's it, a full time YouTuber. The amount of money I spend on the payroll to edit the YouTube is not how much I get paid from YouTube. I get paid. I get paid monthly. And I'm so grateful thank you for watching those views. Keep watching, but we glamorize things, and we think, oh, they're doing this. So it must be doing so. And yes, the ads you have, or content fees, or all the different appearances that could all bring an income, but you and I live currently in a place where healthcare isn't a given, and so unfortunately, someone has to have it. And, two, I'll just be really honest guys, someone has to have a W2 in a relationship, because if you both, like our, Brad and I, and you work for the company, no one wants to give you a loan. Like, the hoops. It took us 18 months to get our mortgage, 18 months we could to pay the bill we're already paying, you know. So I share that because it's frustrating. And if you're in that situation, we see you and we hear you, and it's the other thing that we talked about on your podcast, Finding Arizona, is putting pressure on something before it's ready can actually destroy it. Or Big Magic, have you read the book Big Magic? 

Jose Acevedo 20:36  

No. I'm going to write this down. 

Lesley Logan 20:37  

Oh, put it on your list, Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love girl. So her book, Big Magic, I have read multiple times, and she says, ideas want to be born. So if you have an idea and you don't act on it, someone else will do it, which is why you're like, oh, I had that idea. Like, you didn't do anything about that, right? So there's that. But also, she says, if your idea is artistic, if it's creative and you try to live off of it before it is ready. You will filter, change, correct, make. You might even lower standards or make decisions based on the income you need at the time versus what the art was, the creativity, the vision, the goal was in the first place. So she shares she did not quit her job as a professor, even after she sold Eat, Pray, Love to movies. She really waited until she knew I can live off of me being Elizabeth Gilbert, the writer, and it's really awesome. And I really love that vulnerability, because there is a dream I have where I just get to interview people and go on retreats and, you know, teach my mentorship. But also got a mortgage to pay. I got retirement. 

Jose Acevedo 20:37  

Yeah, you got to work towards it. 

Lesley Logan 20:37  

Yeah. And we got retirement accounts we want to make sure, there's a lot going on. So you have to kind of balance like, am I playing small or am I playing it wise? It's a game of life. Am I making the right decision in this moment for where we want to go? 

Jose Acevedo 22:08  

Yeah, and I feel the exact same way of you bring up this, this idea of baby steps, and I feel like that's where we kind of refocus a lot of the times on and not like we don't want it. It is about putting effort into everyday tasks or everyday things that allow us to move forward and move that needle to the point where we were like, yes, this is everything's pointing to. We can do this now, and we can transition and not feel like again the pressure is come solely on the creative part, the thing that we love doing, and now it has to hold us financially up. It's one of those things where it's like, and I brought this up on our party, it's like, that's what brings me most fears, because I've always loved doing this, and I don't want it to be like this martyr of like, it has to feed me, it has to, you know, pay my bills and all these things where that, when it was in the beginning, was just this fun conversation, this, this fun, light-hearted thing of like, tell me about yourself, tell me why, and to put pressure on it so much to the point where it's like the people ask us, why do you put yourself in a corner by just focusing on Arizona? Well, it's not putting yourself in a corner. It's actually this ever evolving thing that always changes, that always has newcomers, that always has someone. 

Lesley Logan 23:25  

You are never gonna run out of content. 

Jose Acevedo 23:27  

Yeah, never gonna run out of content. And so no, it's not that it's having passion for something that is ever evolving, and wanting to show light on that and give people a chance at the table and give them the mic to recruit for themselves, like advocate for themselves, and have joy for what they created, and all of these things. And I. 

Lesley Logan 23:45  

I mean, you wouldn't run out of content if it was just finding Phoenix like you just wouldn't. And there's like, how many millions of people live in Arizona and then moving to Arizona and leave it like, there's always going to be new options for listeners. And I think don't ever let anyone tell you you niche down too much, because that's not even true. But I think what you guys could challenge yourself is like, what are the fears, and what would it look like if it did work? And then we'll set from there, because that's how, I like to work backwards. When the pandemic hit and we actually had to start from scratch-ish, we already had OPC. It was already in existence, but it wasn't paying our bills. What paid our bills was me touring the world and teaching in real life. So I was like, okay, if this has to pay our bills, how does that look like? What is it? What is it looking to put pressure on this, and how do we do it so we're not making compromises that are not, because what most people want is they want a Netflix option. They want to do Pilates whenever they want to do it. They want to have access to their old class whenever they want. But they don't, because they actually don't use it then. How long have you got whether you don't check one of your streaming accounts? And so there were values that I was like, no, this is hell. I'm going to die on this, because that's what makes us unique. Like you're like, no, we're Finding Arizona. We're not finding the US, like we're, or the southwest, or whatever the Sun Belt is, whatever they like to call us. You're not that. So, you know, I think there's things where like this is for sure never gonna change. We're never gonna do that. But what does that look like if it works? And what does working look like? And sometimes you're afraid to dream big because it is possible. It's so scary. So I don't wanna discount that. Brad and I, the only reason I can say that we lucked out is that we were forced in a pandemic to make it work, because it was like we had to pay our bills. We don't, we don't we work for ourselves. There is no one sending me any money for a paycheck to work from home. We have a great couple that we know, and seeing them thrive today is like really fun. We watched these two people doing the dream like they were performers. They both were headliners on The Strip. They had their dream home, and in the same week, both of their shows closed, and we were like, I'm so sorry, and they said this to us, and there was something that always sticks with me. They're like they were velvet handcuffs. And the idea of me going out and audition again, I just don't even want to do it. I'm most grateful that this happened, and he has, he went back to school. He changed his life. They're having a baby like they both have changed, transformed what their resume is and what they do on this planet. And it's cool how it can change, but it also, when you have a consistent paychecks coming in, it can, it's hard. It's hard. So. 

Jose Acevedo 24:00  

I've heard this one individual. I can't even, I'm bad with names, but I'm always so invested in what people say and what their beliefs are. But it's like, I heard this saying, Do your life the nine to five, so that the five to nine is your, you know.

Lesley Logan 26:32  

Oh yeah. You work to live, not live to work. So you're like, your nine to five is only there to make sure that your five to nine is super cool.

Jose Acevedo 26:39  

Yeah and so that's where I'm at right now in life, and it's just really been great. And it's, I cannot tell you that it makes me feel good that A. I still have a passion for it, and B. it's building this legacy, not just for me, but for the little guy. In all honesty, fatherhood has changed a lot about how I see the world, how I perceive the world, and how I, you know, go about the world and it's joy when he says that I have fun doing a podcast is the best thing that I can say about what this means to me now, because it's just again, I want him to know that I'm a good dad, but I also want him to know that I'm a good person as well, because I care enough that I have these conversations with the people, because I don't want to feel like I don't love the world. I don't want to, I don't want him to think that you can't, you, you're, you need to be afraid of everyone. I want him to know that there are good people out there, and there's a community that will back him, and so hopefully down the road, he'll see a couple of the episodes and be like, my dad, I love him. He did a great job doing this.

Lesley Logan 27:49  

That's so beautiful. That's amazing, and it is interesting. We can see our life through the lens of someone else, because there's a lot of things that can weigh on us that actually have nothing to do with the big picture, but they feel very important. There are certain things that really make sure that they're like, I want to be heard and I want to be seen, that actually are not that big of a deal, and they're not part of the goals. But when the obstacle happens or the mess happens, they can feel like they're priority. And then you have this guy, his name's Atlas, right? 

Jose Acevedo 28:18  

Yeah, his name's Atlas, yeah. 

Lesley Logan 28:19  

Atlas go, did you have fun doing this thing that you love? And it's like, yeah, thank you for bringing me back down to earth and remind me what I do. That's so, it's so fun. It's so cute. 

Jose Acevedo 28:27  

Yeah, it's just something about his joy of the world and life itself, it just brings me back to like, calm and steady. And again, it's like, fatherhood has changed me 100% from this, you know, I always felt like I was like, I'm so selfish. I'm like, I want so much for myself. Then he came into my world, and he's changed so much about me, and I want so much for him, and so much for him to see everything and give him a lot of the things that I didn't have as a child. But I understood, I understand now as an adult, my parents did the best that they could with everything that they had, and that is all I want to do for him. And if that means, you know, keep podcasting because it makes you happy, dad, then I'm going to keep doing that. And you know, there's a lot of things that it's just, again, they're not as important in hindsight right now, because I'm just really so glad that he's given me the opportunity to see the world and through his eyes and through his perspective, and want to just make it the happiest, joyous childhood ever. 

Lesley Logan 28:51  

Oh, my goodness. And also, you're not sacrificing something you love because you think it will make that you're showing your son, you and Britt are both showing your child, like, you can do things that make you happy and you don't have to sacrifice the things you love to do that. I think it's really cool for them to grow up in a household where, like, yes, you have a nine to five, but also this other thing that makes you really happy, and you're dedicated to it, and you see it through. We had a guest on Episode Five, everyone. She said actions are caught, not taught. She's very aware that her kids are watching what she says about herself and what she does. I want to ask we don't have Britt here today, so unfortunately, we'll have to hang out with her another moment. But you work with your spouse on this podcast. Brad and I work together, and I'm sure you guys get all the time,. I don't know, I don't want to assume, but people are like, oh my God, tell me how you and Brad work together because I think I want to work with my partner. I find myself going, maybe don't do it. And I love working with my husband. But also, I'm particularly aware that it's not unicorn and glitter all the time. 

Jose Acevedo 30:38  

Yeah, absolutely, yeah. 

Lesley Logan 30:39  

So tell us how it came to be that Britt started working on the show and like, how do you two each share this incredible podcast together? How do you guys make it work?

Jose Acevedo 30:50  

Yeah, so we had this conversation too. It's like on my podcast, where it's I told you about how I met her through work and through working in a co-working office, and just again, being intimidated by someone of her stature at the time, she had her own business, and I was just working my first big boy job out of college, and really it was like I was interested in her, and she asked me for my WiFi password. We had these conversations. We were getting to know each other. And then I was like, I want to take you out on a date. I don't think I have the time during the weekend, and I'm kind of worried to tell you why. And she's like, why are you embarrassed? I'm like, I'm embarrassed because I have this podcast that keeps me very busy when I'm not working here on my job and she's like, oh, I love podcasts. So she binged the entirety of all my podcasts that weekend, and she was like, look, I love what you do. I think it's so interesting. Can I help you somehow? Is there some way I can help you take photos or something? I was like, that would be really great. That would be really awesome. And I would thank you so much. And if I pay you, like, let me. She's like, no, no, no. Just let me help you and you can teach me. And so I was like, she was interested in photography at the time. So she was like, okay, let's go do this first episode. And then actually turned into a date. It was really her way of showing interest in me and wanting to do this together. And she took photos the very first time as a date. And we, you know, had, it was luckily, at an ice cream shop, and it was this, like shaved ice. So she took photos. We ate and had dessert afterwards. And then it evolved into dating a lot. And she was being involved. She was helping me produce. She was helping me get clients, get people on the show. And then she came up with ideas on how to actually make this a business. And I took it to heart because she owned her own business. And we had these conversations before about like, how does Finding Arizona become more than just a podcast? How do we approach it in a business aspect? And I very much, I think, what is the best part about our relationship is I'm very open to her having a conversation with me. Communication, I think, is our best ability between the two of us. I think one, her vulnerability and empathetic nature to connect with me and wanting to share her ideas was the biggest part of how we grew together and how we emotionally stayed connected, but also really move forward in hard times, having being communicative and just communicating how we feel, how we think we should go about, you know, moving forward through a struggle or anything like that. I think that is the best way that we kind of came together and said, okay, this is how the business work. I showed her everything. I was like, this is how I do everything. Where do I go from here? Like, how do I go and move this forward? How do I make this a business? How do I, you know, do my taxes through this and all these things. And so she sat down with me. We've had this conversations on more than one occasion of these are the things that you need to have this business thrive. And so she was kind of teaching me and being my coach. And now we're, I'd like to say we're on the same page a lot of the times when it comes to what we should be providing. What we should be doing next. What are should be the next goal, baby step forward and communication. I think having those points in our relationship to A. talk about ourselves and talk about how we feel about each other, but B. talk about the business. So typically, we'll have, and this is kind of looking into the our relationship, at the end of the year, we'll have kind of this business conversation, but throughout the year we'll have personal conversations, go on dates, really try our best to talk about leave the business side and talk about A. our goals as parents and our goals as a couple, and really put that towards our date life, and then leave the business aspect for, you know, the quarterly stuff, the quarterly meetings and having those really hard conversations, like, how are we going to make money off of this? Or, how are we going to, you know, move forward into the next quarter of like business and how we, what events are we going to go to? Who are we connecting with? How are we even teaching ourselves new things so that we can add it to our repertoire of things that we provide for the podcast? So I think having a point of conversation with your significant other, and making sure you also separate some of those things, because it can get really murky if you bring in and she's trying to have a conversation about relationships, but you're trying to talk about the business. It's really separating those two entities, and I like to say Church and State sort of thing. But you know that sort of idea of like, we really try our best to have those date nights throughout the year and talk about our relationship, talk about who we are, talk about things that aren't, don't do anything with the podcast or business, and then leaving scheduled appointment dates of businessy talk and things like that. So it can be however you want to retrofit that, whether, if you want to talk more about the business, you know you want to have more dates, whatever it may be, but I think having those scheduled items is very vital to checking in, not only for yourself, but for your significant other, if you are working with them and making sure that you're what we say on the same page and moving forward together.

Lesley Logan 36:46  

Yeah, I think that's really, I love that you prioritize the relationship. Because I think if we prioritize the business goals, then it's really easy to forget why you're doing it and what it's for. And if you are someone who works for yourself, the business has to work for you, and otherwise you just created yourself a boss that's very demanding. So when we bought this house in Vegas, we sat down in April of 2020, we're like, well, what do we want for our lives? Forget the business. What do we want for our lives? Where do we want to live? Where do we want to work? What does our schedule look like? How much money do we make? How much does it cost to live the life we want to live? And then we went to the business and go, okay, the business has to support this life, as opposed to us supporting the business. And I think that that's really important. And so, yeah, you're right. However you want to retrofit that y'all is up to you, but make sure your personal goals are the priority. Because whether you work for yourself or you have a job, the job is there because it's helping. It gives you access to the things that you want. You know, there's this amazing book that I read so many years ago, and it's called, I want to say it's called sunny, it's like, not sunny side up, but it was like something like that. And it was not about whether you saw the glass half full or the glass half empty. You saw something in the glass. But one of the things that she said in there was about parking or driving away. The story was like, she's at brunch, and it was outdoors, and a car drove up, and the car was idling. It was pulled up to park, but it didn't turn off. It just idled, and over, she watched how, she stopped her conversation, and then how the whole area of the brunch stopped their conversation to look at like, what is this car doing? Because it makes everyone uneasy. What is this, what does this car do? Is it gonna go? Is it gonna stay? What's going on? And so the idea was, like, you need to park or drive away. And then she went into a story about a person who didn't love their job. It wasn't awesome when they actually looked for other jobs that they realized was, well, this job allows me to pay for the private school my kids are in. I get off work at a time that lets me spend time with them, lets me do this. And so she reframed the job that she had to this job may not be my dream job, but it provides me with the dream life I have. And we can get a little confused, and so I just want to go back to know what your goals are for your relationship or for your family or for yourself, if you're by yourself, and then the business goals have to reflect that.

Jose Acevedo 39:05  

I think I look back on the early part of our relationship, and I say to myself, I was embarrassed at the time because of the podcast just taking up so much time in my life. I look back at it now, I'm like, I was sort of embarrassed too, and I didn't address this personally because I didn't want it to take over her life as well, because I really wanted this thing to really be something, but I also didn't want it to take over her life and be, but she has shown me that it can provide us with an opportunity to, like, you, said, live the life that we want, and share so much of our own world of like she's made up these things of like the blog wouldn't be what it is today without her. The vlog is a combination of all of our videos, but it's like this way of sharing our family life with our fans, but also it's like this other thing, of like, it's home movies for our family who live far away from us that don't get a chance to see us a lot. So it's like this beautiful thing of sharing that with them, but also with our fans as well, and she's shown so much of how much she cares about this podcast and how much she cares about others that I'm still amazed by her. I'm still intimidated by her on so many of those factors. Because without her being in my corner, I don't think that I would be the person that I am today, but I also don't think the business would be where it's at today. And I thank her all the time, and I hope she knows this, but I think she is the cornerstone of what makes this podcast have a heart, and I think she's the best part of me. She's the best part of our family, and she's really, truly, this entity that I cannot describe any more than she is the heart of this business. 

Lesley Logan 41:07  

Oh my gosh. Well, we have to let Britt, when she listens to this, have a moment to enjoy that lovely speech for her. So wanna take a brief break, and then we're gonna find out how people can find you and Finding Arizona, and all the things that you guys are doing together. 

Lesley Logan 41:19  

Okay, Jose, you are like one of the most beautiful humans in the world. And I think everyone is hoping that their husband is telling someone that exact same speech that you just said about them, Finding Arizona, they can find it anywhere that they're listening to this podcast. But do they have to live in Arizona? Is this something they can enjoy if they're visiting Arizona? And also, what else do you and Britt have for our listeners?

Jose Acevedo 41:41  

Yeah. So this is available on all podcast platforms, of course, but we also have now video format to a lot of these episodes that we provide on YouTube. And on top of that, like I was discussing earlier in the podcast, we have a vlog that's a little bit of this family life. And what we do for the business, we go to events as well, meeting new people, networking, and we share that along with on the YouTube, we have a website that is available for a blog that gets a little bit more of what we've learned and found through the community and what we're passionate about, what we're intrigued by, that's a little bit more of the inside of our minds being put out into this, like, blog form, so that Britt puts that together. But it's, again, it's all of these things could be found at our website, findingarizonapodcast.com but also on our YouTube page, Finding Arizona podcast, you'll just search it, and you'll find us. You'll see us. We're big smiley people, and we always try our best to make sure that it's routinely updated and that you're constantly getting new items every week. And on top of that, I mean other events that we're going to on a very routine basis. You can catch us a lot of the community events throughout Phoenix. And we are also trying to do a little bit more of in-person 101 classes, teaching the kind of 101 of podcasting, Britt has done an event where she's speaking about it at a Phoenix Design Week. There are a couple of other events that I don't have it in front of me, but I wish I could give you some more information on, and I will actually send an email to you so you can provide that to the individuals. But there are a lot more events that we're going to be in-person for that you can catch us at, say hi and get a little bit more one-to-one action with us. And you will get to see Atlas, too. Atlas loves going on these little adventure excursions, and you'll see him in his little Finding Arizona shirt, and he's always down the clown, and he's a fun time.

Lesley Logan 43:34  

Oh my gosh, so fun. Yes, you guys should absolutely be teaching people about podcast and getting started, because you've been doing it for 10 years.

Jose Acevedo 43:42  

Yes and on top of all of those things that we do in person and all that, we actually just started this. And this is something of the service arm of what we provide in video production, audio production. We're calling it The Found House. And you can find it under our web page, The Found House over at findingarizonapodcast.com where you can actually, if you want to work with us, one-to-one and start your own podcast, we provide that option as well.

Lesley Logan 44:08  

Awesome. That is what we need. Thank you for doing that. 

Jose Acevedo 44:11  

Yes, absolutely. 

Lesley Logan 44:12  

Okay. You guys, all those links are, of course, in the show notes. And if you are wondering about how Finding Arizona podcast is, I was on it with Brad. Brad made an appearance. Holy moly, it's rare. So go listen. You get to hear the inside of his brain on all the things. 

Jose Acevedo 44:28  

I love Brad, by the way. 

Lesley Logan 44:29  

We love Brad. You know what? Here's the thing, everyone loves Brad. And whenever I go anywhere without Brad, they're just like, where's Brad? Where's Brad? So that's why he's not actually allowed to not be there. Because I'm like, am I chopped liver? So. 

Jose Acevedo 44:41  

He's right over there. Go look. And that's sometimes how I feel about Britt and this is the crux of having parenthood be a part of what we do is should some of these events are late at night, and Atlas can't go to those. So one of us has to stay behind to do bedtime story time, and one of us has to go. And then it's if one of us goes, like, where's the other person? 

Lesley Logan 45:02  

Yeah, where are they? What's going on? Well, I love that. It's like, okay, hi, but I'm right here. So you know, you have been such a gem already, but we love to end the episode with, Be It Action Items. Bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted steps people can take to be it till they see it. What do you have for us? 

Jose Acevedo 45:17  

I think it goes back to what we were talking about those baby goal routines set for yourselves. I think you should always try your best to set a big goal, but also make sure that you're taking those routine steps, or those small steps forward to allow yourself and your what your goal is to move to approach that. Take those tiny steps that you know are digestible, edible that you can do and make sure that you're reaching closer and closer, because if you look back on those little steps, you will actually see that you were providing yourself the opportunity to move forward. And one of the big things that I keep going back to, or at least what in our conversations, like life responds to effort. That's something that I heard, is life responds to effort. And you're not making an effort, you're not moving anywhere, you're stagnant. You have to make an effort. And whatever, it's those little things that matter and those little things that count to your goals. 

Lesley Logan 45:18  

Oh, my God. Mic drop on that. That is brilliant. That is, rewind everyone, listen to that last, that was freaking amazing. Jose, Finding Arizona. Thank you for being you. Thank you for sharing your story. Give Britt some love from us. We're hopefully gonna see you guys, when we're in person in Arizona soon. Y'all, how are you gonna use these tips in your life? Tag Finding Arizona. Tag the Be It Pod. Share this with a friend. Share this with an Arizonian but also share this with someone who needs to hear that 10 years ago, it was baby steps and just showing up and being consistent, like we all need these inspirations in our lives and until next time, Be It Till You See It. 

Lesley Logan 46:52  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.

Brad Crowell 47:35  

It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan 47:40  

It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.

Brad Crowell 47:44  

Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan 47:51  

Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.

Brad Crowell 47:55  

Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.

Lesley Logan reveals how a small but consistent shift in her nighttime routine helped her reclaim deep rest—without sacrificing joy. This inspiring Fuck Yeah Friday reminds us that progress doesn’t come from doing more, but from honoring what we truly need. Tune in for a refreshing perspective on mindfulness, routines, and the unexpected power of rest.

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] mailto:[email protected].

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.

In this episode you will learn about:

• A compassionate approach to ethical consumer choices and boycotting.
• Why confidence is a gateway to new opportunities.
• The underestimated power of refining your systems.
• How Lesley’s meditation practice transformed her sleep and stress.
• Why sustainable routines require experimentation—not perfection.

Episode References/Links:

• Introduction - 00:47
• Ethical boycotting insight - 01:06
• Confidence after eLevate – 04:27
• Owning business growth – 05:18 
• Lesley’s sleep breakthrough - 06:20
• This week's mantra - 08:11

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSI

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Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan 0:00  

It's Fuck Yeah Friday. 

Brad Crowell 0:01  

Fuck yeah. 

Lesley Logan 0:02  

Get ready for some wins. Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Lesley Logan 0:47  

Hello, Be It babe. How are you? Welcome to your Fuck Yeah Friday, where we are celebrating awesome things that people are doing, including yourself and myself and a mantra, and we're doing it short and sweet, so we can enter this weekend with some inspiration, like, what is possible in this life. It's not all bad, right? There's got to be some good stuff. So this inspired me. I thought I wanted to share it with you. I'm recording these in February, and so obviously a lot of people right now are talking about a lot of different boycotts that they're doing. So just want you to know if I mentioned any businesses that may have changed their ways, like, that's a delay, but do your research, okay? But what I wish someone told me before I started boycotting, and I want you to know I wanted to share this with you, because I think it can be really tricky. I'll share my wins, what's going on. So the first post that they said is, disclaimer, boycotting is a labor of love. Oh, and this post is a labor of love from an ex mega, M-E-G-A consumer, not telling anyone how to live. Just sharing what I've learned along this journey of redirecting resources. So she said, starting out, pace yourself, start with one area and give yourself grace. So the truth is, our consumption habits were carefully engineered over generations, so unlearning takes time. And by the way, this is from jnaydaily, jnaydaily. So if you are feeling the urge to boycott or maybe you thought about that two months ago, and here we are in April, and you still haven't figured it out, it's okay give yourself grace and pace yourself. And she says to start with one area, okay? Making choices, when facing a purchase, ask yourself, can I borrow this? Can I find it secondhand? Is there a local option? Can I DIY or use what I have, what's within my current capacity? So move through options based on your energy and circumstances. And I really love that, because can I be really honest, asking to borrow anything from anyone, it kind of makes me go. I don't know, but Brad borrows all the time, right? So, but can I find it secondhand? That's where you could search online to see if somebody is selling it used, right? Or is there a local option you could use? Because when you invest in local stores, it actually goes back into the community in a big way. So, can I make it myself? And then, obviously, making it yourself might not be something you can do, you know? So we currently have some lawn furniture that Brad was trying to, like DIY it, and, you know, it might get to the place where we have to use a local option. So capacity formula. So some of your boycott choices, best is to do local, ethical, DIY, secondhand. So anytime you're avoiding buying something, the best thing you could do is go local, ethical, DIY, secondhand. Better: Alternatives closer to home; Good: more mindful, mainstream choices; Basic: What's accessible right now. So, think net positive, not perfection. Every redirect matters. It gets easy with practice. And then food freedom. So, simplifying food and sourcing, so obviously you have to buy food. So I love this that she added this in here, because it's really easy to like, okay, I can buy a secondhand chair, but I can't just make an orange. So, focus on whole foods and seasonal produce. Explore international and local markets. Join a CSA and support local farmers in exchange for produce. You can go to localharvest.org for that. Find community gardens. You can go to communitygarden.org for that. Look for state-made products and learn how to make a few staples and trade with friends and neighbors. Is this not the coolest thing? I'm going to make sure that the team puts this post in the show notes. But I was inspired by this because at our house, we are working on the boycotts on some brands. And, you know, look, it's not that we'll never buy from them again, it's that we want them to be better. We want them to do better for us. We want them to do better for everyone, right? Want them to do better for their employees. So here we are in April. If there are still brands that you're like, hey, I want them to know that I vote with my dollars. You know, this is how you can start that out. So I hope that that was helpful. 

Lesley Logan 4:27  

Okay, now for your wins. Nancy Lawrence, she's been to Cambodia with us. Oh my God. It's been so fun to see what she's been celebrating after an amazing Cambodia experience where she manifested all this stuff and she's an eLevate grad. She wrote, I have gotten hired at a Latina-owned Pilates studio in Arlington, Texas, Aris Pilates. I'm so excited to work with the Latino community and possibly teach in Espanol. Miranda, her daughter, will also be teaching there. They are thrilled to have me, and I'm so excited to get started. The confidence I have today as an eLevate alumni has opened so many doors for me, including the confidence to step out of my comfort zone and into new studios, because I know I have the appropriate training, which makes me a good teacher. I mean, girl like you were made for this, you know. And I think it is so cool that these women will get to learn amazing Pilates from you, and I'm glad that you have the confidence to go put yourself out there, because they need you. You're the only person who can do what you do the way that you do it. 

Lesley Logan 5:18  

Katelyn Elser has a win for us. She is an Agency member. I'm really proud of this woman. She actually recently quit her full time gig to run her own home business, and she's looking at some other possibilities and growing really fast, because she just is believing in herself and she's doing the work. And so her win is, I launched small group classes, three to four per session at the beginning of January, and they have been a huge hit, with six sessions per week and seven new clients. Way to go, Katelyn. You know, here's the thing, do you hear how these wins are? They don't have to be huge. Katelyn's not something I've helped 600 people, no six to seven people. It's important that you hear that, because I'm not trying to make Katelyn's win small by any stretch of the imagination. What I'm trying to get you to understand is wins, we have to celebrate the things that we do. We have to actually acknowledge what we did. There's a lot of shit going on. And so if all you're focusing is all the things that are not going well, you are not going to have a happy life. And it's not that I'm talking about having a happy life like, oh, you know, I don't see the pain in the world. No, it's I can see that I'm doing these things to make an impact on this world in my way that I can. And so I love that, Katelyn, thank you so much for sharing it. 

Lesley Logan 6:20  

All right, a win of mine. I have a solid morning routine. You know this about me. That's, you know, not an issue. But I have been reading a book with Brad that I absolutely love. We're in a big series, and if you know, you know. And one, the fourth and fifth book aren't going to come out for a long time, so I've been slowing down our roll on the third because once they're done, then we have to wait probably a year for the fourth book, right? But I have been having problems with it, because the book kind of stresses me out a little bit. I'm someone who kind of will Google the end so that I know what's coming up and I can have some certainty. And so one, I haven't done that, so there's a win. But two, I started getting nightmares when we finished the second book. I was the main character and Brad was the other main character, and I couldn't save him. Anyways, it was a whole thing. So I have been like, okay, we can only do one or two chapters. I've been ending things I don't let it go close to bed. So like, great. That was a win, just not letting us listen to it close to bedtime. But the other thing is, I was still having some of the stress dreams, and so I was like, oh, I just don't know what to do. I'm gonna need some sort of sleep. No, actually, I know what to do. I need to meditate before I go to bed. I need a palette cleanser, and it can't be the news. And so what I'm saying is, this week, every single night, I have made sure I've done some sort of meditative practice, and it is helping. It is helping. I'm not dreaming about the book in a stressful way. I somehow did dream about Schitt's Creek in a slightly stressful way, but my sleep scores are still amazing, and my readiness scores are still amazing. So the point is that it's working, and it's not about perfection. It's about being in process and trying to figure out, right now I'm in experimentation mode, like, what meditation do I need to go to bed with that actually gives the best sleep. And so I share that with you, because a morning routine is amazing, but a nighttime routine is also epically amazing. And so your win doesn't have to be like, you know, I hit 17 goals in my business today. Can be like I went to bed on time and I gave myself a meditation to help me have the best sleep in my life. You know, being it till you see it doesn't come from doing all the time. Sometimes it comes from not doing, right? 

Lesley Logan 8:11  

All right. Your mantra for the day. Life is meant to be shared. Life is meant to be shared. Oh, it really is. So thank you everyone who sends your wins in because life is meant to be shared. Thank you for those who share this podcast because life is meant to be shared, and every single person who listens, when I hear your feedback, we're sharing this experience together, and it's kind of amazing. So thank you for bringing you. Thank you for listening to this podcast. Thanks for sharing it, and until next time, Be It Till You See It. 

Lesley Logan 8:45  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.

Brad Crowell 9:28  

It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan 9:33  

It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.

Brad Crowell 9:37  

Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan 9:43  

Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.

Brad Crowell 9:47  

Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.

What if your success was hiding your stress? Lesley and Brad break down the signs of high-functioning depression and how Dr. Judith’s Five Vs can help you reclaim your joy. From burnout to anhedonia, this conversation offers real tools to track what actually makes you happy. It’s a powerful reminder that joy is personal—and redefining happiness starts from the inside out.

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] mailto:[email protected].

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/#follow-subscribe-free.

In this episode you will learn about:

• How to recognize overlooked symptoms of high-functioning depression.
• Ways to measure and increase your personal joy points.
• The contagious nature of joy—and how to spread it.
• Daily practices that help you feel more present, centered, and fulfilled.
• Why reconnecting with your “I am” can ground you in who you truly are.

Episode References/Links:

• April UK Mullet Tour - https://opc.me/uk
• Spring Pilates Training - https://opc.me/events
• Pilates Studio Growth Accelerator - https://prfit.biz/accelerator
• Cambodia October 2025 Waitlist - https://crowsnestretreats.com
• Contrology Reformer - https://opc.me/reformer
• Contrology Mat - https://opc.me/foldingmat
• Dr. Judith Joseph Website - https://drjudithjoseph.com
• High Functioning Book by Dr. Judith Joseph - https://a.co/d/9sFHkQW
• Anhedonia Quiz - https://drjudithjoseph.com/anhedoniaquiz

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSI

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Be in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlist

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Resources:

·        Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-g

·        Lesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/

·        Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/

·        Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/

·        Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQ

·        Profitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/

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·        The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses

Episode Transcript:

Brad Crowell 0:00  

We have this idea, this preconceived idea, of what depression is, and that's not necessarily like the only way that depression looks, right?

Lesley Logan 0:09  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Lesley Logan 0:51  

Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co-host in life, Brad, and I are going to dig in to this validating convo I had in the last episode with Dr. Judith Joseph. 

Brad Crowell 0:59  

Dr. Judith Joseph. 

Lesley Logan 1:00  

So good. I clearly decided to start while Brad is still getting ready, and we're not going to worry about that because he has ADD, I have ADHD. We're just going with it. Okay? This is how two people making it work. Guys, how are you? I cannot believe this is episode 509, on the day that we're recording this, I'm gonna actually post and celebrate the episode 500 that like just happened. It came, it went. Life was going on. Because, you know, life, life's fucking life, guys. 

Lesley Logan 1:26  

So today is April 10th and it's Consumer Awareness Week. Consumer Awareness Week takes place from April 10th to 16th this year. Oh, thank you. 

Brad Crowell 1:37  

Ready to get started now, guys. Okay, here we go.

Lesley Logan 1:37  

This day aims to educate buyers and consumers about their basic rights. This includes access to information regarding the goods and products they are purchasing. The sellers are enforced by law to reveal the ingredients they are using in their products, and they also have to follow certain guidelines regarding quality and standard of the product of being sold. If any of the above stated rules are broken, the seller's answerable to the court of law. Yes, consumers are powerful and many laws have been passed to protect them from being exploited. Are you aware of all of your rights? If not, celebrate the week and find out all there is to know. So here's the deal, actually, really, really important. Depending on what state you live in, those who are in the States, you have different consumer buyer laws, depending which country you live in, like there's these different things. So definitely, if you don't know, you should absolutely do some research and do some Googling. But I also just want to say, like, we're recording this after several different weeks and days and months of like, exercising our consumers and power, and it is working. Like, have you seen how much it's working? Like, I don't shop at Target, but I've been part of the not shopping at Target. Like, you know, there's a couple things we need, I was like, not getting it there. My poor assistant was like, so where are we getting these things? And I'm like, oh, here's an art store you can go get them at, and they're $1 more, and it's gonna be fine. So Target's less, like, $15 billion the last time I checked, $15 billion, $15 billion, you guys, this is great news. I don't want anyone to lose their jobs, none of that kind of stuff. But also, like, we have to tell these people who is in charge here, so. 

Brad Crowell 3:04  

Yeah, it's actually really difficult right now, especially in the States, with people taking a wrecking ball to the things that that actually hold companies accountable, such as the FTC and their Consumer Protection Bureau. So there are literally laws that are supposed to protect us, and right now, there are people in power who are trying to give companies back the power to do anything that they choose, and that is going to eventually affect every single person, not just in the United States, but if you're buying products that were made in the United States and you're overseas, they might not be made with the same kind of qualities that, you know, they need to be, so. 

Lesley Logan 3:45  

So here's the thing, even if you feel like you have no rights or voice, your dollar has power wherever you live in this world. And so where you spend that money does matter. And I get it like we have been in places in the States where I'm like, okay, so this is the only place we can shop right now. This is the only place to go. So, you know, don't, please, don't starve. Please don't, like, go without, but like, if you can spend an extra dollar and go to a different store, go support small businesses. Go support women-owned businesses. Go support people of color businesses. Like, I promise you, you'll feel so much freaking better. You'll just feel better. Like, it felt good to be like, oh, we're gonna, look at this place over here that has exactly what we need.

Brad Crowell 4:18  

I mean, slash or I'm just buying less stuff because I'm like, oh, I need to buy that thing and what would be my normal thing would be, go to Amazon and just order the thing. 

Lesley Logan 4:26  

You know, in one of the FYFs, I actually told people how they can boycott like in a way that like helps them. So if you haven't ever listened to FYFs, I'm adding like things in it that inspire me, plus your wins, plus my wins, and they're still under 15 minutes. And I actually did do it. It's really fun. Okay. 

Brad Crowell 4:41  

Cool. Cut me off. So what I was actually gonna finish saying there is that, you know, I'm actually buying less stuff because my natural inclination is to just go to Amazon and then to just order it, right? But now I'm like, okay, well, if I'm not ordering from Amazon, or if I'm not ordering from Target, or if I'm not ordering from Walmart, you know, then where am I going to get this? And now there's more effort to go figure that out, and probably requires a trip to the store, which I don't really have the time and the schedule to just go do that. So the convenience is, is definitely something that we're trading. But also my pocketbook thanks me, because did I really need to buy that thing. Chances are it's 50-50.

Lesley Logan 5:23  

Yeah, yeah. Well, in the FYF episode, I actually explained it, you could also borrow it if you need to, like, if you really need it, but you don't need it forever, you could just borrow it, right? So anyways, we have to keep going. So know your rights. Consumers all around the world do some research. This will actually make you it'll make the companies that you work with even better because of it. 

Brad Crowell 5:40  

Yep. 

Lesley Logan 5:41  

Okay, we just literally wrapped up the eLevate retreat. So that's a retreat at our house for those who graduated the eLevate program. And we also had just wrapped the reformer weekend for eLevate round five, which is super, super fun. If you're interested as a teacher in eLevate, you can apply for 2026's program, and then that way you could come to 2027's retreat, because the retreat is for the grads, and it's really special. I guess, don't you love it? I love it. I love having the people here. I love having all the different years of grads here. I love being able to see them in person. So it was absolutely fabulous.

Brad Crowell 6:14  

It's a good time. It's a good time. People are amazing, and it's, what's been really fun is to see the incredible sense of community created even across different groups of grads. So year one, year two, year three, etc, etc, where, where they're intentionally building community, and they're part of this really amazing group. So it's been fun to see that from our perspective, for sure. 

Lesley Logan 6:38  

Yeah. And then also, last week, we actually opened up the registration for the UK tour, the Mullet Tour. 

Brad Crowell 6:41  

The Mullet Tour. 

Lesley Logan 6:41  

So, you guys, if you are in Europe or the UK, or you want to fly there, we're going to be there this September. 

Brad Crowell 6:52  

Yeah, we're going to be there in September. And what is a Mullet Tour, Les? 

Lesley Logan 6:55  

Business in the morning, Pilates in the evening. That's how it goes. Business in the front, party in the back, business in the morning, Pilates in the back, in the evening. No? 

Brad Crowell 7:05  

Well, sort of. You just mixed a whole bunch of things, but it's business in the front, Pilates in the back.

Lesley Logan 7:12  

Right, but it's in the morning and then the Pilates is in the evening. 

Brad Crowell 7:15  

Yeah, okay, we're gonna go with that. 

Lesley Logan 7:17  

Well, that's what the Mullet Tour is. It's our second event. It's not annual, because we skipped a couple years. So I don't know the next time we'll be in the UK. I'll be really honest. We're already booking 2026 stuff, and 2027 we just got booked for something potentially so like this might be it, UK, for a couple, for a little bit, so. 

Brad Crowell 7:35  

For a bunch of years. 

Lesley Logan 7:37  

Yeah. So get in. 

Brad Crowell 7:38  

Do it. Make sure you're paying attention. 

Lesley Logan 7:41  

If you understand how the UK works, the studios are quite small, so space is limited, opc.me/uk is where you can get that information. You can come to workshops. You can come to classes. Obviously, the deal is in there. If you get all the good stuff for the Mullet, the whole Mullet, you need the whole Mullet to get the deal. Also coming up. 

Brad Crowell 7:57  

You need to show up with a mullet or you can't come. Just kidding. Don't do that.

Lesley Logan 8:02  

(inaudible) on a lot of people. So don't do it. All right. April and this month that we're in right now, towards the very end, it is Spring Training. What is Spring Training? Well, there's the baseball people's doing spring training, and it's our version, and it's a week of Pilates classes with the OPC teachers and myself, mat classes, reformer classes, chair classes, tower classes. You can get the mat only ticket, or you can get the full spring training pass. It's a freaking great deal. If you go to opc.me/events, you'll hear about it as an early bird, which means you'll get a better price than anyone else. 

Brad Crowell 8:35  

Yeah, get yourself on the wait list. 

Lesley Logan 8:36  

You don't have to be a teacher. You can be someone who's just been doing Pilates. You can also be someone who's like, pie-curious, and you're like, I don't know. Maybe this is time. It's gonna be a lot of fun. I'm just gonna say we have uniforms. The dog has a uniform, everything. 

Brad Crowell 8:37  

It's gonna be great. In fact, there's a theme to this one. It's all about the push ups. 

Lesley Logan 8:54  

Oh yes. 

Brad Crowell 8:55  

So this is our first annual spring training. We do want to do this every single year, but that will depend on you, gotta show up. 

Lesley Logan 9:03  

We wouldn't do push ups next year. And also, if you would, ah, push ups, it means you have to sign up.

Brad Crowell 9:08  

That's right. 

Lesley Logan 9:08  

It means you have to sign up. 

Brad Crowell 9:09  

It's intentional. All right, cool. So that kicks off at the end of April. So go to opc.me/events right now, so you can get on the waitlist where you're actually gonna get that early bird offer. Only the people on the waitlist get the early bird offer. If you are a Pilates business owner in any way, meaning you are taking clients and getting paid by anybody, then I want you to come to my free Pilates business webinar. It's called the Growth Accelerator, and it's going to help you, whether you have a studio or home studio, or you're taking clients in the park. Go to prfit.biz/accelerator. That's profit without the O dot biz slash accelerator, and we're going to be talking about the three biggest secrets that Lesley and I have learned over the past 2500 clients we've coached. We're going to share those things with you, and it is awesome, actually. It's really been a great experience so far, doing this on a consistent basis, and we want you to join us. Lastly. 

Lesley Logan 10:01  

Lastly, we're going to Cambodia this fall. 

Brad Crowell 10:05  

Yep, October. 

Lesley Logan 10:06  

Yeah and people are like, oh, I want the 2026 dates. And I have to say, we have a tentative date, but we are waiting on some news. 

Brad Crowell 10:11  

We are waiting on a couple of other things to fall into place before we can confirm the 2026 dates. But here's what we can tell you, we're only going once in 2026, this year '25, we were able to go twice, next year because we're traveling to Europe at the beginning part of the year, we can only go to Cambodia one time. 

Lesley Logan 10:27  

And so we want you to come this time. 

Brad Crowell 10:29  

Don't wait, like, a year and a half from now to do this. 

Lesley Logan 10:31  

No, I mean, like, things will just be, your life is not going to get less busy. 

Brad Crowell 10:35  

It's true. It's very true. 

Lesley Logan 10:37  

Like, just like, when does that ever happen? So, so you're going to go to crowsnestretreats.com and snag your spot. 

Brad Crowell 10:43  

Yep, crowsnestretreats. 

Lesley Logan 10:45  

Only a few spots. Go grab yours. Okay. 

Brad Crowell 10:48  

crowsnestretreats.com

Lesley Logan 10:50  

Yes, do that. Okay, we have to talk about Dr. Judith Joseph, but first we have a few audience member questions. Audience questions to answer. 

Brad Crowell 10:58  

We do. This is interesting. We've had a bunch of questions come in recently about types of equipment and models and brands and all those kinds of things. So I'm just gonna quickly zip down them, @JohnLanningQ7B on YouTube, asks, hey, my wife is looking for a machine currently. What brand model is yours, Specifically? He was referencing a reformer video, @Finaloadonell3419 on YouTube asks, where can I buy a mat like you're using? And @marilynhighness4234 on YouTube also asks, hello, thanks for this great workout. May I ask where can I get this Pilates mat with handles and a strap? Thank you so much. 

Lesley Logan 11:35  

Yes. Okay, so John, my reformer is a Contrology Reformer. I like the 80-inch. It's really amazing. Prefer it to anything longer, unless your wife is over six-four, that's what I would get. And I like calling a machine myself as well. I think it's really cool. Also, it makes it feel like that's why it's expensive. It's a machine. I buy it. So that's what I use. 

Brad Crowell 11:57  

You can go to opc.me/reformer and you can literally get a link to the one that Lesley uses. 

Lesley Logan 12:03  

There's a little discount on it too. Then for my mat lovers, I use the Contrology Mat. That's the mat with the handles. I prefer the Contrology Mat to all the other brands out there. Yes, I've tried most of them all, and the rest are too squishy, way too squishy. And after just teaching the reformer weekend and then having the mat weekend eLevators, every single different teacher who was on my equipment was able to be like, oh, this, this is what is happening, right? Like, this is what, like, this is why I'm not connecting when I think I'm connected, because most people are on too squishy of apparatus. And so if you're a tight person, the squish, kind of like fills in the gaps, and if you're a hyper mobile person. you kind of like, fold into the squish. So you want to get the Contrology Mat and. 

Brad Crowell 12:47  

Just fold in the squish. 

Lesley Logan 12:48  

You fold in the squish. 

Brad Crowell 12:49  

Just fold it in. 

Lesley Logan 12:50  

Just fold it in. 

Brad Crowell 12:50  

Fold it in. 

Lesley Logan 12:51  

Yeah. So opc.me/mat gets you the discount link for the mat, if those for whatever reason, don't show a discount at checkout, then just hit me up and with your email and I will connect you to a person. So that was all the questions, right? I answered them. 

Brad Crowell 13:05  

Yeah, you got all three. 

Lesley Logan 13:06  

Yeah. I'm a cool, I'm a Contrology demo center. So I think it's really important that you know I'm freaking biased. However, that being said, my bias does not come from me not having explored all the equipment or having other brands. I have actually just sold them because I prefer the Contrology I really think that they have a great thing going on there, and their customer service is really helpful if anything goes wrong. So I, not that that does happen. But you know, like, shippers, things like, you gotta just, you want to have build up relationship. And I really love Balanced Body, and Jay worked with them closely on the Contrology line and you know how much I love Jay, by the way, the day that we're recording, this is his birthday. 

Brad Crowell 13:40  

What? 

Lesley Logan 13:41  

It's his birthday today. 

Brad Crowell 13:42  

Come on, I didn't know that. 

Lesley Logan 13:43  

Yeah, we did. Last year, we actually celebrated his birthday with him.

Brad Crowell 13:48  

Well, I didn't, yeah, okay, cool. I'm not remembering last March 25th.

Lesley Logan 13:52  

Happy Birthday, Jay. And he hates it. 

Brad Crowell 13:55  

Happy Birthday, Jay. 

Lesley Logan 13:55  

He hates right now that we're doing any of this. Okay, well, now go get your Contrology stuff, and if you have questions about any of it, you can just DM me. I will happily answer. I love talking about equipment and making sure you get the right stuff for you and what your practice is. And you know, somebody else was like, hey, I'm thinking of getting a folding reformer instead of a mat and spine corrector. And I was actually able to talk about, like, why there is a classical reformer that folds. I have not personally experienced it. It is not cheaper than a regular reformer. It just happens to fold up. And when I'm in Chicago this fall, I'll get to kind of explore it with someone who is in my program who has access to a Contrology Reformer, and that one so I can give you more comparisons, but like, it doesn't become cheaper, it just becomes foldable. Anyways. 

Brad Crowell 14:38  

I just want to give you guys a quick update. The actual link for the mat is opc.me/foldingmat, folding mat. 

Lesley Logan 14:45  

Folding mat. 

Brad Crowell 14:47  

Folding mat. Because you're gonna fold in the mat.

Lesley Logan 14:49  

Fold in the mat. All right. The wheels have come off this bus. We have to take a brief break, and then we're gonna come back and talk about Dr. Judith Joseph.

Brad Crowell 14:56  

Stick around. 

Brad Crowell 14:59  

Welcome back. All right, let's talk about Dr. Judith Joseph. Dr. Judith Joseph, MD, MBA is a board certified psychiatrist, researcher and passionate mental health advocate, recognized in the 2023 Congress Proclamation Award, with that award. She's dedicated to making mental health conversations more accessible through groundbreaking research and social media. In her book, High Functioning: Overcome Your Hidden Depression and Reclaim Your Joy, Dr. Joseph helps readers identify hidden depression and discover the unique science behind their own happiness. And I'm really excited to dig in, because there's a ton to learn in last episode. 

Lesley Logan 15:37  

I learned so much. I mean, this was like I got turned on to this guest because we have a different guest. We had on about anahandria. And I was like, okay, this is the first time I've heard this word. I'm very interested. And so then a friend of mine who listens to the pod. 

Brad Crowell 15:52  

What it? What is it? 

Lesley Logan 15:53  

Anahandria.

Brad Crowell 15:54  

No, anhedonia. 

Lesley Logan 15:56  

Anhedonia. 

Brad Crowell 15:58  

Yeah. 

Lesley Logan 15:58  

Anhedonia. 

Brad Crowell 15:59  

Anhedonia, A-N-H-E-D-O-N-I-A anhedonia. 

Lesley Logan 16:03  

Yeah, guys, I'm a little dyslexic. Anyways, so, but I had been turned on to this person, and I did some research. I like, went down the rabbit hole of her, and I was like, oh, I really love that we have another person's voice on this. And also, like, a book that's coming, that's out on this. And so first of all, there's so much in the episode, you must go back and listen to it. Also you have to grab her book, ladies, I think it's gonna be amazing for you to give to your friend. But she said, there's a, there are tons of people out there who have the symptoms of a depression but are still functioning and over-functioning because they are the rock and I think a lot of people listening, I mean, if you didn't feel so seen and so heard during this episode, like you, there's not a time for you to be depressed. 

Brad Crowell 16:46  

Yeah, who's, who's the rock, like, you know the person who keeps the family together, or the person who, you know, you could be the breadwinner, or. 

Lesley Logan 16:55  

You might not even be the breadwinner, but you're, you're the like, you might bring money to the family, but like, you're the person who gets them on the bus. You're the person who gets every like, if you take a day off, there's no groceries for dinner, like you're the rock, like you're the. 

Brad Crowell 17:09  

Teacher, doctor, boss person, you know, whatever. 

Lesley Logan 17:11  

But also, like you could be working at a place, and especially now with everything's going on, you could feel like, if you stop, they'll just replace you, and then you have nothing to go back to, and that's gonna even be more depressing and more so you are just like over. 

Brad Crowell 17:26  

You're not allowed to stop, you're not allowed to fall apart, no way. 

Lesley Logan 17:28  

So you keep it all together, but you're actually like, not happy, and the things that used to make you happy don't make you happy anymore.

Brad Crowell 17:35  

We have this idea, this preconceived idea, of what depression is, and that's not necessarily like, the only way that depression looks, right? Depression certainly can look like that, but also it, we might not realize that we're depressed because we think, well, I'm out there kicking ass and taking names everyday.

Lesley Logan 17:53  

I get up, I got, I've showered, I wash my hair, so I can't be depressed because I got dressed and I'm actually doing great at work.

Brad Crowell 18:00  

Yeah, and, and, you know, I think, I think there's something specific that you said about it, that you said, I'm going through the motions. There's no joy in it, you know. And I think she really responded to that. She, like, lit up. She's like, yes, that's exactly, that's exactly it like, you know, it's absolutely possible to still be doing all the things, but when there's no joy in any of it, that's like, can also be depression, right? 

Lesley Logan 18:29  

Yeah. And I just want to add, before, I want to say, like, she said, not only over time does it wear on you, but it can feel like you don't have anywhere to turn to. Because if you go to the regular medical world, they're gonna be like, here, you look fine, right now, you know so, and my girlfriend is a social worker, and she was trained that people would be coming and looking for medication. So, like, she's like, Lesley, people probably needed it, but they're like, they looked clean. They looked like they got, they got them, like, all the things there. And so I think, like, it's just important to know that these different things are out there, and you might be experiencing them, and you might actually have to be advocating for yourself around these things. So I don't know, I just, this blew my mind.

Brad Crowell 19:10  

Yeah, and, you know the joy, the element of joy missing, I thought that was intriguing, but, but the other thing that I that like, really blew me away was it seems quite logical to me that we say my biology is different than your biology, so the food that I need is different than the food that you need. I know that they custom-make nutrition plans for the astronauts, they all have a different custom nutrition plan because their bodies function differently. Here's what I never took that to the next step and realized happiness doesn't look the same for everybody either, right? So we have this concept of like, well, do this thing to be happy. Well, that might make you happy, but it doesn't necessarily make me happy. And now that I'm saying it out loud, it sounds very logical, but I never thought about it. And when Dr. Judith said that, she said your happiness is not the same as my happiness. There's a lot of people out there trying all these different things, but it's not working for them. That's because they're basing it off of the science of somebody else's happiness. And she mentioned that, this was also, I found really interesting, so the definition of anhedonia was that, basically you're missing the joy, right? And there's more to it, but I'm forgetting it off the top of my head. But she said it's actually contagious, right? So if you work in a high stress environment, I'm putting that in air quotes, right, I used to work in a place like this, where it was stressful for no fucking reason, right? It was stressful. Why? Because the boss, that's how he felt like a good company's run, right? And so he would make arbitrary deadlines that had literally no reason. This has to be done by tomorrow. Why? Why? What's happening tomorrow? We just have to get it done by tomorrow, right? And it was like this manufactured stress, and it created this, like, high, this frenzy, this high, high, strong atmosphere, right? And that is contagious. And she said, but guess what? So is joy. Joy is also contagious, right? And I thought this is really interesting, because I've, I operated in this high stress environment for like, six years, and you know, people would come in and they would say, how do you do this? And I'd say, I don't know. I just do it, right, but it's probably because I was conditioned to do it. Well, interestingly enough, I think we can also flip that and condition ourselves to find joy, to be in joy, you know? And she said, when you start to shift inside, people are going to notice it in you. You have something that they want, and they're going to start gravitating towards you. Yeah, I, I really appreciated all this. And she said, she said, how do you know what happiness is for you? She said, there's a lot of science under it. Well, first off, she has a quiz about anhedonia, right? And I think that's, that's like a great. 

Lesley Logan 21:59  

I love that quiz. 

Brad Crowell 22:00  

It's a great jumping off point. We're gonna put the quiz in the show notes. The link to the quiz in the show notes.

Lesley Logan 22:05  

It's only 17 questions, and it takes two minutes. 

Brad Crowell 22:08  

Yeah, it's a self-assessment tool for self-reflection, right, and it allows you to understand, like, yeah, am I finding the joy, you know, in my life? And then from there, she's got tons of resources. She obviously is the reason that the timing is really great here, because her book is just coming out right now, and she has a book called, it's called High Functioning: Overcome Your Hidden Depression and Reclaim Your Joy. 

Lesley Logan 22:36  

You guys, you can pre-order it today and if it's available by the time, but, here's the thing, if you, like, I think this is the type of book that needs to be on the New York Times bestseller list, because we, the more people know about this, the more we can change the contagion. 

Brad Crowell 22:51  

Yeah, so HFD is what it's about, right? High Functioning Depression. And she says, hey, look, it's not like an official diagnosis. You couldn't go to the doctor and get diagnosed as HFD. But I think that that's like comma yet, because her research is started, is effectively what she's trying to understand is, you know, like, you know, can this be something that can be diagnosed? Because people are experiencing these, these feelings, and they are, they are experiencing depression, even though they're, you know, high functioning. So, very interesting research. 

Lesley Logan 23:27  

And also, I recently got added to the DSM at some point, because this, I was in high school, and the DSM was like a three so, like, we find things out and we add it in. So I. 

Brad Crowell 23:35  

I don't know what a DSM is. 

Lesley Logan 23:37  

Oh, it's this, it's like an encyclopedia for mental health stuff. So, like, it's where every doctor goes when it comes to, like, like your.

Brad Crowell 23:44  

Diagnosis of Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders.

Lesley Logan 23:47  

Yes, yes. So when I was in high school, I remember it being, like, three, maybe, maybe it was a four already. But I remember being, I remember my teacher specifically saying, do you see how there's a three? It means there was a two and a one, and that means that like, as they, as we learn more, we add more and like, I think the more, I think it's really, not that we should label everything, but I do think when you have a label for what you're going through, you feel less alone, and you have an understanding of, like, how to operate, to get back to where you want to be. I just think that's how, that's how it works.

Brad Crowell 24:23  

Yeah. And I, you know, I do want to say, obviously, Lesley and I are not psychiatrists, but Dr. Judith is, so, you know, that's, that's a really great place to get started.

Lesley Logan 24:32  

If this is your first episode, and you were thinking you were listening to two psychiatrists. I'm so sorry to disappoint you. We are two people who talk to a lot of smart people.

Brad Crowell 24:40  

All right, well, stick around. We'll be right back. We're going to dig into those, Be It Action Items that you covered with Dr. Judith Joseph and they're pretty, they're pretty fire y'all. We're gonna dig into the Five Vs. We'll be right back. 

Brad Crowell 24:53  

All right. Welcome back. Let's get into these Be It Action Items. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your convo with Dr. Judith, Joseph? I'm gonna go first here. She talked about practicing the Five Vs to reconnect yourself. And this, I had to go back and listen to this, like, two or three times, because she also talked about, like a overlapping Venn Diagram, and then, and then, like, the conversation just went a different direction. And we never finished that thought. And I was like, where is it? But we did cover the Five Vs. So the Five Vs, and she writes about them in depth in her new book, are Validation, Venting, Values, Vitals and Vision. She said they can really help you understand the science of your happiness and increasing those little points of joy every day. And what she means by that is, when you're doing research, you often create points, right? You like, like, if this happens, you get this many points. If that happens, you get this many points. If this happens, you lose points, whatever. They're points. It's a point-based system. And she said, so her tools help you evaluate your happiness in a, in a scientific way, you know, so and she uses these Five Vs to reconnect with herself. So what I was saying, I would start with her quiz. I'm sure part of the quiz is going to be going through these Five Vs, or at least that's in her book, and that'll help you start to figure out, like, you know, where are you on this? You know, are you? Are you? Do you have HFD, right? The High Functioning Depression. She says, Start with one or two. Don't, don't start with all five. 

Lesley Logan 26:24  

Be It babes, you do not get to start with all five. You just start with one or two. That's what the doctor said.

Brad Crowell 26:29  

Okay, so pick one or two, tap into it. Don't overwhelm yourself. Validation and venting are great places to start. And so check in daily, and track your joy. So check in daily, and track your validation and venting and then she has the Anhedonia Scale to measure whether or not you are getting points of joy in life. So that Anhedonia Scale, we're going to link to that in the show notes as well, so that you have a quick link to go find this information. But, but this is great. I mean for, especially, for those of you who are a one woo person like me, having a systematic approach to measuring something as amorphous as happiness is very helpful. It helps, clarify things. So what about you?

Lesley Logan 27:22  

Well, I was just thinking about how the longer life is going the way it's going where we are, I might become a two woo. I might just go all in on the second woo. That doesn't mean I'm I'm not, I'm not for Dr. Judith. I'm just, just saying it right now, if you hear me say I'm a two woo girl, you know why.

Brad Crowell 27:39  

Heard it here first, people.

Lesley Logan 27:40  

Heard it here first. So the other part of her Be It Action Items that I really love was she said she was talking about Deepak Chopra meditation and like, how we can get caught up in, like, I'm a Pilates instructor, I'm a mom, I am this. And like, when you even say your name, your name can represent a lot of different things that you're known for, or what people think you are known for, or whatever it is. And so she suggested you do what he said, which is like, lose your name and just say I am, I am, and you can repeat I am. And what it does is it really helps you become present in just being a human, in your experience that day. And that is like just being right, like we forget to just kind of be in our bodies, which is really, really cool, and you get to have that self-reflection. So, and I think it's easy to forget who we are or like or think of ourselves as, like, having all these different compartments, and then forgetting, like, why are we doing all the things we're doing? What is all this for? You know, and I really like when I lead a breath work session. I'll ask the people, like in agency, I'll ask them, like, okay, like, if you need more energy from others, put your palms up. And if you need more energy, if you want to actually keep the energy you have, you don't want any more from anyone else, put your palms down. And I actually, like, sit there and I ask myself, like, I notice I ask myself the same question, like, do I need more from others? Do I need this? So, like, being able to be present is really helpful and understanding like what we need and who we are and where the joy is coming from. So you guys, I was blown away. I'm blown away by Dr. Judith Joseph, and I am so grateful that she was on the pod. We get to say we knew her when this book goes on the bestseller list and the HFD becomes something that we all can actually like, you know, find easily if we need it. And so go, go check her out, go get her book. And I'm Lesley Logan. 

Brad Crowell 28:10  

And I'm Brad Crowell. 

Lesley Logan 29:28  

Thank you so much for joining us today. Thank you for being part of 509 episodes. 

Brad Crowell 29:33  

What? 

Lesley Logan 29:34  

What? When I say we can't do it without you, it is actually not just written down. It's like, truly, truly, if you don't listen, we can't make these. It's not cheap. It's free for you, not for us. So we, we truly are so grateful that you share these episodes, that you come, you tell us what your favorite ones are, that you tell us what your feedback is, like, it really means a lot to us. So please share this with a friend who needs it. Share this with a friend who you might think has HFD so that they can, like, go listen and take the quiz themselves, because remember, joy is contagious. 

Brad Crowell 30:02  

Joy is contagious. 

Lesley Logan 30:03  

Until next time, Be It Till You See It. 

Brad Crowell 30:05  

Bye for now. 

Lesley Logan 30:07  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.

Brad Crowell 30:49  

It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan 30:54  

It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.

Brad Crowell 30:59  

Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan 31:06  

Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.

Brad Crowell 31:09  

Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.

Psychiatrist and author Dr. Judith Joseph joins Lesley to unpack "high-functioning depression," a hidden struggle affecting many high achievers who seem successful externally yet feel emotionally exhausted inside. Discover why driven individuals often overlook signs of burnout, the surprising prevalence of anhedonia (lack of joy), and Dr. Joseph’s practical framework—the Five Vs—for understanding and enhancing your personal happiness.

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected].

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• How to spot signs of high-functioning depression and overcome anhedonia.
• Why your emotions, including joy and anhedonia, directly influence those around you.
• The role of trauma, people-pleasing, and over-functioning in our mental health.
• Dr. Judith’s biopsychosocial model for understanding your own unique path to happiness.
• Easy ways to reduce burnout by shifting from constant "doing" to mindful "being."

Episode References/Links:

• Dr. Judith Joseph Website - https://drjudithjoseph.com
• Dr. Judith Joseph Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/drjudithjoseph
• High Functioning Book by Dr. Judith Joseph - https://a.co/d/9sFHkQW
• Anhedonia Assessment Quiz - https://drjudithjoseph.com/anhedoniaquiz
• Guided Meditation by Deepak Chopra - https://beitpod.com/deepakchopra

Guest Bio:

Judith Joseph MD, MBA, is a board-certified psychiatrist, researcher, and award winning content creator who specializes in mental health and trauma. She is chair of the women in medicine initiative at Columbia University Vagelos College of Physicians and Surgeons, clinical assistant professor in child and adolescent psychiatry at NYU Grossman School of Medicine and Chief Investigator at Manhattan Behavioral Medicine, New York City’s Premier Clinical Research Site. Dr. Judith was awarded by the US House of Representatives with a 2023 Congress Proclamation Award for her social media advocacy and mental health research. In 2024 she was named a top 6 NAACP Mental Health Champion and a VeryWell Mind top 25 Thought leader. In 2024 She taught a Workplace Mental Health Course to The Executive Office Of The President of The United States of America. In addition to being a notable public speaker at prestigious institutions, Dr. Judith is a sought after on-air expert who has been featured on Oprah Daily’s The Life You Want Series, Good Morning America, The Wendy Williams Show, Tamron Hall, Today Show, CNN News With Anderson Cooper, The Mel Robbins Podcast, and more. She recently received a 2020 and 2023 Share Care Award for her MedCircle series on PTSD and a Good Morning America investigative special on ADHD. Social media’s favorite psychiatrist, Dr. Judith boasts more than 880,000 followers across platforms, a 30% increase in less than a year. Her Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, and YouTube videos receive more than 15 million views per month.

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Episode Transcript:

Dr. Judith Joseph 0:00  

I think the more you practice this, the more exposure you get to this, not only do you change, but the people around you change. I always say Anhedonia is contagious, but joy is contagious too.

Lesley Logan 0:13  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Lesley Logan 0:55  

Ladies, and the few good men who listen, hi. This is amazing. This is exactly an episode I wanted to have since last fall. We had a whole topic on Anhedonia, and I got so many of you reaching , going oh my God, tell me more. So, I found an expert. Get your notebooks out. If you're driving, you'll hit, you'll, just listen, because you want to listen again, you're going to take some notes, and also you're going to want to get this book. So Dr Joseph's book is going to be out April 8th, and so you, normally, I don't preview that. I let you fall in love with her and then tell you, but I'm already in love. I'm going to make sure I get my hands on a copy of this book. So definitely check it out, but here, for you to get the help that you deserve and some amazing validation of who you are and what you're going through, here is Dr. Judith Joseph. 

Lesley Logan 1:40  

All right, Be It babe. I am honored, truly. I heard about our guest today through one of my favorite people in this world, Amy Lavell, and so Dr. Judith Joseph is our guest today. She has a story to tell us, and also has done so much research, and I wanted her on the show because my high-functioning peeps, I see you, we keep talking about not being a perfectionist, not over committing, not do all this stuff, but I thought we'd have an expert come in and talk about the journey of what that does to us and how we can get out of it. So Dr. Judith Joseph, thanks for being here. Can you tell everyone who you are and what you rock at? 

Dr. Judith Joseph 2:12  

Thank you so much, Lesley. I'm a board certified psychiatrist. I am based in New York City, and I am high-functioning. AF. All of my followers know it. I do a gazillion things on top of being a single mom. I run a lab, content creation, podcaster, author of my book High-Functioning, conducting the first ever study in the world on high-functioning depression, which is something that you know is not really recognized at all in medical literature. But I don't think the depression of our days is our grandma's depression. I think there's a whole new beast out there, and many of us don't even know that we're walking around with it. So I'm trying to demystify that and to bring useful tools to heal.

Lesley Logan 2:56  

Yeah, that's why I was so intrigued by you. Because what I hear all the time is like, well, I'm not depressed because I get up every day. I do 17 other things, but there's no joy in it. And so can we maybe, maybe take a step back and figure out, like, what is high-functioning depression, and what are the maybe some of the signs that we might be having it?

Dr. Judith Joseph 3:15  

Well, you said two really great things. You said, listen, we're still getting up. We're doing our stuff. It doesn't look like anything's wrong. And you also said something that's really key, that there's just no joy in it. And actually, the two are connected. So when you go to a doctor or therapist, they're going to pull out this bible of psychiatry called the DSM, and they're going to go through checklists. And according to the DSM, the bible of psychiatry, Diagnostic Statistical Manual, if you don't meet criteria for a lack of functioning or significant distress, but you have all these symptoms of depression, like sometimes you have poor concentration, poor sleep, feeling on edge. That's what we call psychomotor agitation or restlessness, low mood, anhedonia, which is a lack of joy and interest and pleasure in things that once used to light us up, but you don't meet that box of lack of functioning or significant distress. They're going to be like, well, you know, come back and see me when things are really falling apart. The problem with that is that there are tons of people out there who have these symptoms of depression but are still functioning and over functioning because they're the rock, right? They're the mom, they're the boss, they're the teacher, you know, they're the doctor, the nurse, that people depend on, so you can't fall apart. So how do they cope? They busy themselves. They people-please and, eventually, something's going to give either they physically burn out, they mentally burn out, they have a major depressive disorder where they actually do stop functioning. They medicate with substances or with alcohol or self-soothe by shopping too much and going broke, right? Something's gonna give. So why are we waiting for people to lose functioning to do something about this? Why aren't we preventing it? And that's where the research comes in.

Lesley Logan 4:56  

Oh my gosh. I think first of all, a bunch of people just were like, uh, I have all these things. That's me. I meet a lot of women who are doing all these things, and yet they don't have that joy, that anhedonia that you mentioned, and they try to get help, and the help is either medications that they don't need right now because they're not fully depressed, or they're being told to come back later, and that's so frustrating to not feel heard, and then you just keep doing because you're like, okay, well, maybe I need to do this other seven things. Maybe these things will be the thing that makes me feel better. So I know that people feel so seen, and also I really hope that this becomes the thing people can get diagnosed with, because in that bible, because it does feel like, as you said, this the depression we're having now is not from grandma, because it's true, I don't have children, but if I just were to take off for a week, my team could do a lot, but at some point I need to, like, show up, like the wheels don't spin without, you know, so , it does, it can feel like there's extra pressure on the women who are going through this. How did you get involved in this topic? Were you just seeing it as a bunch of people coming through, or is it something that you went through? Like, can you tell us a little about how you got intrigued by this? 

Dr. Judith Joseph 6:06  

Yeah, actually, it was during 2020, I was given this talk from the same desk that I'm talking from right now, and it was a large hospital system, and it was April, and people didn't know what the pandemic was going to do. They, I mean, we didn't know anything then, and I was called in to really give people the tools to get through a tough time. And halfway through the talk, I realized, I think I'm depressed, but here I am at my desk with my gazillion degrees behind me, instructing doctors and nurses and healthcare professionals on how to heal. And I didn't even realize that I was depressed because I was a doer, you know, and I had this saying, are you a human doing, or are you a human being, right? And I think a lot of us, that's our coping mechanism, at least for me. I'm an immigrant. I come from scarcity. It was never an option of giving up. You had to, you know, if times are tough, you work harder. If you go through something like a breakup, then you just got to take on more tasks at work, you know. And a lot of us cope with our pain by busying ourselves by doing versus just being and feeling and over time that wears on you. And I found myself at that moment in time during this Zoom talk, having that epiphany, and then led me to wonder, how many people on the other side of the Zoom feel like me, because there are a lot of nurses, a lot of doctors in healthcare. Then I started looking into, you know, some I'm in Manhattan, so a lot of my clients are performers, and they went through a really hard time during the pandemic, being out of work, and then the strikes and all that. And many of them, even though they were feeling depressed, they couldn't show it. They had to mask it, because they have to perform. They have to light up a room. So I just started looking at all these different industries, moms, you know, who have to do so many things. They have to go to work, they have to take care of their jobs. They have to take care of their kids. All these people masking these symptoms and just not slowing down and doing instead of feeling and healing. And I just thought, I'm onto something. So I created a reel on socials in 2022 and it went viral. It's been seen over 10 million times around the world. And I had people reaching out to me from different countries saying, I have that. I have anhedonia. This is me. How did you know? Like people were joking, do you have a camera in my home? That's me. 

Lesley Logan 8:23  

Yeah, yeah. Well, I mean, I like, as we're sitting here talking, we're two weeks into the new year, so the before, you're, you know, we're taking a few months before everyone's hearing this. And I have friends who are in LA. I lived in LA for 14 years, and, you know, I checked on my friends where I live, where I lived, is still there, because it's kind of in the total middle. And so they're still going to work. Their jobs still expect them to do the thing that they're supposed to do. So they're showing up and doing all the things, and I'm showing up doing all the things, and I'm kind of like, so do we, this is how we just, like handle everything now. We just like keep doing and I think part of it is like it feels normal. And a lot of times we, when there's tough times, we want to do the thing that feels normal, because we we don't want to experience the other thing. But I also think not a lot of us have the privilege in life to not keep doing when stuff is going on, so then you're kind of stuck. You have to keep going, because the world like you are, that's how you get paid, that's how you make a living, that's how all these, that's what people expect of you. And also, you know, there's this underlying currently you can't really deal with so it feels like what you're onto is something that will continue to be happening, but we need to be able to recognize it, so we can label it, so that we can actually go and address it, right? Because we can't just keep living like high functioning, you know, we can't just keep doing that depression. 

Dr. Judith Joseph 9:42  

Yeah, you're absolutely right. I saw this meme, hilarious meme, where it was like, I told my mom I was depressed, and she said, boy, we broke. We don't got time for that, you know. And I thought it was so funny, because you're right when you go through hard times and you don't have the privilege to slow down or others depend on you even if you are economically sound, but others depend on you. You just don't feel like you have that privilege to slow down. You feel like, well, let me just do because that's what I've always done, but you're absolutely spot on, something's gonna give either your body breaks down. And I think that's why a lot of women have these autoimmune conditions, because women, particularly are like they just have so much on their plate. There's so much expected of them. They're not allowed to seem deflated because someone else is going to take your position. Someone's going to say you're on your period, or you're going through menopause. You know, there's just so much on our plates that we don't feel like we can slow down and certain under represented groups, same way, they're just happy to be in the room. Certain industries, doctors, like, if a doctor says that they are experiencing depression in certain hospital systems, they have to report it to the state. I mean, like, there are certain industries that you just can't even say that you're struggling. So I think that if we allow ourselves to process pain, it's not saying that we have to stop everything, because that's like the worst nightmare for someone who's had function AF. It's about teaching them how to get back into their body, how to process their trauma, so that once you start to feel the pain, then you can also feel the joy. But if you continue to numb and you keep on doing you're not going to be able to feel the pain, but you're also not gonna be able to feel the joys in life that we are all, you know, built to enjoy.

Lesley Logan 11:28  

That's so, thank you for sharing that. I think , like it's, to feel, I have a yoga teacher who is like, you cannot have one thing without the other. Like in the world, we want balance, you cannot have love in this world and not have hate. If you get rid of the hate, you get rid of the love. If you want to only have peace, there is war. Otherwise, you wouldn't know what you're in. And so if you want to have joy in your life, you do have to also feel your pain. And I think also not many of us were really raised on how to feel our pain. If I cried in public, it's like, hey, don't do that like you learn to mask it or bury it. And you brought up women with autoimmune issues. It is insane. How many women I know with multiple autoimmune issues, and you start to go, okay, what is going on here is either that we actually are testing for it, or the life that we're living now is causing us to harm our bodies in ways that are not visible, and not even things we would choose to do, but because we just keep shoving and not getting the help we need, or even if you're trying to get help, not being heard to get help. It's causing a lot of issues I feel like cannot be reversed, and we're missing out on a lot of life, you know. And you mentioned something about getting into your body that I love, because I'm a Pilates instructor, and I believe if you get into your body, you know so much about yourself. For the people listening, what are ways that you help people get in their body? What are the ways, the tools that you've used? 

Dr. Judith Joseph 12:49  

Well, I love this Venn diagram called the biopsychosocial model, and I teach my patients. I teach my clients. It's three bubbles, if you can imagine them overlapping, but those three bubbles are a nice representation of each of us, and I always say your happiness is not the same as my happiness. Know the science of your happiness because a lot of people out there, they're trying all these different things, and it doesn't work for them, but that's because they're basing it off of the science of someone else's happiness. But there is only ever going to be one you. There's only ever going to be one Lesley, ever. I mean, when I think about that, I get chills, because it's like you're so unique. So understand what your makeup is. Understand your bio, which is basically your past history, in terms of your family history, your current medical conditions, what are the medicines you take? What are the supplements you take? You know? You have a very unique biology. Understand your psychology. That's the psycho part of the biopsychosocial you have traumas that are different than my traumas, right? You have resilience factors that are different than my resilience factors. You have a different attachment style, possibly to mine, right? Or different strengths or weaknesses psychologically. And then, the social aspect, we're just saying, I live in New York, you live in Vegas, there are different environmental factors there, right? You probably eat different foods than me, or we have different movement routines. You may have a different work environment than me, right? Understand your relationships. Those are all the social things. So we all have unique factors. And if we were taught to understand these overlapping diagrams, we would understand the science of our own happiness, and we wouldn't be chasing after someone else's happiness. That's number one. And knowing about the uniqueness of your happiness, if you're someone who tends to have a lot of pent up trauma in your body, then I could tell you to eat as much kale as possible, but that's not going to treat your trauma, right? So in that case, I'm going to focus on the psychology bubble of that Venn diagram, and I'm going to say, let's try and process that trauma. We may have to do some 5-4-3-2-1, exercises with you, or some more trauma-focused work, like EMDR work or trauma-focused therapy, making you feel safe again, because that's something that trauma survivors, you know, really grapple with that sense of safety and psychological safety, right? But if you're someone who, on the biological end of things, has an autoimmune condition, has headaches and really intolerable physiological symptoms, I'm not going to be like, well, let's put you in a trauma workshop, right? I'm going to say, let's work with your nutritionist, let's work with your movement specialist, let's work with your autoimmune doctor, and let's see if we can bring down the levels of inflammation, right? If the social issue is the problem, let's say you're in a toxic work environment, where every time you walk into work, you're triggered. Your heart is racing. You have broken self-esteem because people are like, not kind to you, and this is your job that you depend on for your livelihood. I'm not going to say, well, you know, let's have you go see your cardiologist. I'm going, to fix that fight or flight sensation in your chest, I'm going to say, it's your work environment. Let's see if we get you more support at work or get you out of that environment. So everyone has different factors going on, and I think that makes us really unique and special, but it also complicates things a bit further. So I wanted to democratize this tool that is taught in all of medicine and let everyone have access to it so they can understand their unique workup and areas that they should really focus on first and their step to understanding the science of their own happiness. 

Lesley Logan 16:24  

I love that and I do see that there's a challenge there, because we are kind of trained that if you ask the question, you should get an answer, and that answer should help you. But it is true. You know, we all have different needs, especially, and at different times. And I love the idea of the three bubbles, because you can evaluate for yourself, oh, it is more of the psychos. That's where I need to go get help. It is more of this. But I do love like defining our own happiness, which is not easy if you never explored that, if that wasn't something that we were invited to do or even feel. And so I think that where I feel my listeners struggle, where I get a lot of questions, is almost like, how do they know if they're happy? How do they know? Because they're so busy doing and they might even feel like the pain of stuff that's going on, but they're having a really hard time feeling what's happy also, because I think as women, specifically, we sometimes feel bad if I'm happy and they're going through something, I should put things around so people can't see that I'm happy. I should bring my happiness. I should come down. So, I mean, is there tips on how to know what makes you happy? 

Dr. Judith Joseph 17:30  

Yes, and that is why I have a happiness lab in New York City. And a lot of people don't know this, but happiness researchers, we very rarely use that word happy. People are like mind-boggled when they hear that, because a patientwho will come in to see me for private practice will say, all I want to do is be happy. And so I wear two hats. I wear the research hat and then the private practice hat, where I do traditional therapy and medication, but the research hat is really trying to understand whether or not this person's getting happy or worse, and we use points in research. And so I developed this scale, the Anhedonia Rating Scale. Anhedonia means a lack of joy and pleasure. So basically, you want to know how many points you're getting in these basic pleasures in life. If you have like, high anhedonia and you're not enjoying things, then that's a problem. I love to use these quantitative ways because unlike, you know, let's say diabetes, right? If you go on for diabetes tests, you know where your glucose is, you know where your hemoglobin A1C is. But with mental health, it's kind of harder, like you don't have a test where you can look at and say, oh, I'm getting happier, right? But these quantitative measures, these tests, are really helpful. So you can go on my website, take the Anhedonia Quiz and see if you're getting points of joy. 

Lesley Logan 18:44  

You have a quiz? 

Dr. Judith Joseph 18:45  

Yes, I have an Anhedonia Quiz on my website, and you can see whether or not you're getting points of joy in life. And then what I ask is that people practice the five V's, because that's based on the science of your happiness. So the five v's are, number one is validation. A lot of us with high functioning we're always pushing down our feelings if they're negative. We only talk about the good. We don't like to talk about the bad. Someone says, how you're doing, oh, I'm great, and your house could literally be burning down, and you're saying, great, you know? So I want people to start learning how to accept their emotions, whether they be negative or positive, and there are many tools that I give in my book on how to validate, because people have a hard time with validation. Number two is venting. How do you express your emotions? And there are ways to do healthy venting, but there are ways to engage in unhealthy venting. I do a lot of content on, you know, narcissistic parents, and a lot of us had parents who trauma dumped on us when it was not appropriate. So I talk about how to vent in an appropriate way and the different creative ways to vent. You mentioned crying. You know, crying is something that a lot of people don't engage in because they think from childhood they were told to stop crying, you know, like you're a cry baby. But crying is actually a very healthy way to express emotions. And when you cry and you let a good cry, your body calms down, you feel relaxed, you feel more connected to you. The third V is values. And I say that values are things that don't have price tags. They are things that are priceless. So tap into things that, you know what and when you think at the end of the day, your last minutes of life, you're not going to be like, I wish I had that Gucci bag. You're going to be like, I wish I had five minutes with my loved ones, or I wish I had 10 minutes to do something that I always wanted to do, you know? So tap into those values. Try to get part of those values once a day. For me, it's learning and sharing my knowledge with my daughter, so, like, I love to learn black history and science, and I teach her because she wants to be a scientist. That makes me feel great, or when I volunteer and I offer my expertise to underprivileged youth, because that was me at one point in life that makes me feel good, that, you know, that's a value that I'm going to be like, wow, I wish I could do. I wish I did more good in life, you know. And then the fourth is vital. So we only get one body and brain. We have to take care of it. And so, you know, that's probably a lot where you come in, in terms of understanding how to honor the mind-body connection, eating foods that decrease inflammation that are not processed, drinking enough water, getting sleep, you know, like putting that phone away and getting really rich sleep, getting movement that actually helps your longevity and makes you feel happier, and understanding how relationships can be very toxic. And I wish that this was taught in school when I was growing up, but a lot of people don't understand how negative relationships can really drain your life force, and then having that healthy work life balance that's all in the vitals. And then the fifth V is vision. How do you plan for joy in the future? And when I say a future, I don't mean like, 10 years from now. I mean like, as in an hour from now. So for example, after this podcast, I'm gonna have a nice dinner, probably curry or sushi, and I'm gonna eat it, not in front of a screen. I might watch a little bit of Emily in Paris, because that's my guilty pleasure. You know, like these are little points of joy that I'm gonna plan, to treat myself, because today I helped people. I talked with you, these are all things that I need to celebrate, but we don't celebrate but we don't celebrate that. We're like, well, we're supposed to be doing these things, you know, no, every time I get my daughter to school on time, I pat myself on the back, and I sit and I drink my coffee, my oat milk latte, and I take my time. I don't go straight to work. I go home. Take my time. It, 5, 10 minutes, and just say I did a good job. I got her to work. I got her to school on time today. These are all things that we can savor in life, but we rush, we're busy. We don't take the time. We don't treat ourselves like human beings. You know, how many times have you eaten in front of a screen and they're like, you can't even taste the food, you know, and you love the food, but you're like, did you enjoy that meal? Not really. I just needed to get rid of that hunger pain. So the five Vs can really help you to understand the science of your happiness. Once you do that Venn diagram, and then you apply the five Vs to your life, it can really make a difference and increase those little points of joy every day. 

Lesley Logan 23:11  

I really love each one of those in a different way, also what I'm getting. I love that you introduced yourself as high functioning AF, because I do think that a lot of the people like myself and the people who listen to this podcast, we start to think like, maybe I should do less. If I just do less, then I'll be happier. But then we are not happier doing less, because we are people who want to do things, and we are high-functioning people we and so I loved that it's not necessarily about not doing stuff, it's about how you do stuff and how you acknowledge what you're doing. And I think that that's really special, because it's sort of going, going, going, it's like, yeah, pat, I got my kid, my daughter at school on time today. Way to go. Yes. We have an episode on Fridays here. It's called Fuck Yeah Friday. And just this year I changed it so, like, I share a story from Instagram or the internet that, like, inspired me, some woman who inspired me whatever she did. But then it's about sharing the wins from the listeners. So they send in a win, and sometimes they send in these wins, like I finally did, blah, blah, blah. And my favorite wins are, like, I actually made dinner for myself and I went to bed on time, and I'm like, yes, that's a win. That's a huge win. You know, we have to give ourselves credit for that, because, just because it's what you think you're supposed to be doing you not celebrating it is not going to help you enjoy doing it in the future, and it's not going to help you do it in the future. So I, those are my favorites, and so that's what the episode is about. It's about celebrating the things we did do, as opposed to like these achievements that we're waiting to celebrate until a certain time comes. I think that that is, it's hard to do. Most people can't see a win in something or a celebration in something that they're supposed to do. So thank you for highlighting that. Your book. You wrote a book. I think anyone who writes a book to get their word out into the world is amazing, because it's not the easiest thing to write a book. Who is the book for and what are you hoping they get from it?

Dr. Judith Joseph 24:55  

I'm glad you said that people who are high-functioning AF want to do everything, because five Vs is a lot. And I can personally say, and I say this in the book, pick one or two, because the rule of twos says you really shouldn't be working on more than one or two things at a time. But I like one and two. I like validation, because it's something we can all do. And I like venting a lot, like, sometimes I'll just be so exhausted, and I'm like, why am I so tired? I'm like, wait a second, I'm not practicing the five Vs. I validate, I acknowledge, actually, I am tired. I had a long day. And then I vent. Sometimes I say it out loud. Or I'll tell my partner, listen, I had a really busy day. Or I'll tell my daughter, I was like, oh, mommy, had a busy day, you know? Like, I then I really try. Or I'll, like, put something on Canva, on IG, and say I've had a rough day, or something like that, but I'm venting. I'm expressing. And the other things, you know, the values, I try to tap into at least something a little a day, you know, for my values, vitals, that's hard to get to. I don't work out every day. I try to, but it doesn't happen. But at least if I'm not going to work out, well, I'm going to eat well. And if I'm not going to eat well, I'm gonna sleep better or drink more water or limit my screen time. So, there's a temptation to want to do it all, but pick one or two and tap into it, and then score yourself and see if the anhedonia is getting better. And I really do believe that once you start to do these things that are not expensive, like these, are all things within your capacity, right, to democratize mental health, you can do these things, and your life will be happier. But this book is for that family member who never acknowledges how they're feeling when they struggle because they're the rock. The book is for that entrepreneur who really is afraid of bankruptcy, doesn't ever want to be in that position again, and overworks and overextends and doesn't enjoy their wins. It's for that mom out there who puts everyone before herself, who feels depleted but can't slow down because she feels empty and restless when she sits still she doesn't even know what makes her happy anymore. You know, it's for that immigrant student who feels as if everyone's dreams are on their back and they can't fail, they can't tell anyone that they're struggling, it really is for those people who wear a mask, like the educator, the teacher who spends all their money getting their students supplies, but doesn't even eat lunch, you know like you are seeing you matter, so take care of yourself, because there's no one else like you, and you're worthy of it.

Lesley Logan 27:27  

That is so beautiful, and I love that you can be in a different walk of life and this book is still for you, because there is, we all have these dreams and aspirations, and sometimes those are other people's dreams and aspirations on top of that, and it can just be a lot. I'm assuming the five Vs are in this book. If people want to, like, read and score and write notes, I do want to attach that I love, that you put values in there. It's something I really in this house, like, we like to all filter things through my, our values. And I'm like, that's a no, because it's not hitting one of these things, and I can't take on more than that. So I love that. And if it can fit one of these things, I could do it, but doesn't. But I never thought about, like, how to make sure I'm acting with that as a way of finding some joy. Because, yeah, that's really, really cool. And yes, I love that if you're not moving well, then eat well. And if you're not going to eat well, then you got to sleep well. You got to do something. You got to do something for your body. Yes. For you, you practice those five Vs because so in 2020 you felt like, okay, I must have this, like, high-functioning depression thing. Obviously, you worked your way through and this is where you're at, is this something that, as a high-functioning person, you might dip in and out of or you can start to recognize it. And the goal is, like you recognize it faster, so you don't go into the depression for too long before you get yourself out. Like, I guess what I'm asking is for my perfectionist is like, is this a light switch once we get over our shit, can we feel really awesome and we never have to go back? Or is this something that we gotta just monitor?

Dr. Judith Joseph 28:55  

I'm glad you said that, because one of the risk factors for this is something called people-pleasing. But people don't realize that people-pleasing is actually a watered down version of masochism. So before the term masochistic personality disorder was removed from the DSM, the bible of psychiatry, it was really a caricature of someone who sacrifices their own happiness for someone else's happiness, or who's constantly in a position of giving and not getting. And when people think of masochism, they think of sex. But it's not that type of masochism. It's the personality traits that makes people bend over backwards when they shouldn't be but they feel as if that's the only way right? These are doers. They do, do do but what ends up happening is that the takers, they don't, like, thank you. They're resentful of you. They're like, well, do everything because you wanted something, or did you think I wasn't capable? So it actually backfires. So falling into these traits of being a doer is a pattern. It's a way of life for so long but yeah, you're going to work on yourself, but there's going to be a time when you fall back, and I'm guilty of that too. I'm constantly oscillating. But when I start to practice the five Vs and I'm like, let me, like I just demonstrated, let me validate that I went through a hard day, let me acknowledge these feelings, it's easier for me to snap out of that downward spiral because I'm practicing these skills. And so I always explain happiness as when we think of happiness, we think of this picture in the future, like I finally got the job, or I finally got the clout, or I finally got the thing that I wanted, the person that I wanted, the home that I wanted. And then what research shows us is that when we get these things, we're still unhappy. We're on to the next right? So my philosophy has shifted to finding happiness in the now. So when I get into that slump where I'm like, looking around me and I'm like, oh, so and so is doing that, and I'm starting to feel low, and maybe I should be doing more, it's easier for me to snap back into my values, right? I acknowledge how I feel, I validate, I vent it, but then I also tap into my values. And I'm like, wait, but I don't value what they value. My values are different, and I'm pretty good right here, where I am, I'm pleased in what I value right now. So that allows me to slow down. And so I think the more you practice this, the more exposure you get to this. Not only do you change, but the people around you change. I always say anhedonia is contagious, but joy is contagious, too. If you've ever had a boss that was a micromanager who was doing everything and you all were like, oh my gosh, we're so busy, we're all burnt out. And if that something good happened to that boss, let's say they finally dated someone, or they finally got validation in life, or something happened and or maybe even they got ill and they realized this is not important. When that boss shifts, the organization shifts, right? An organization is only as good as its CEO. So I think that anhedonia is contagious, but so is joy. So when you start to shift inside, people are going to notice it. They're going to come towards you and be like something's different. I want what you have, and you may not be more successful, you may not have more money, you may not be more beautiful, but you have something that they want, and they're going to gravitate towards you, but you have to get it for yourself. They can't have what you have. And I really do think that people will start to cultivate joy within themselves by understanding the science of your happiness and applying your five Vs to your life. 

Lesley Logan 28:55  

Oh my gosh. I feel like every woman has to get this book for their best friend, just even as preventative, even if your friend isn't going through this yet, it's true that anhedonia is contagious, and also so can that high function like the doing can be contagious too. So I really appreciate you. I feel like we could learn so much. Now I might have to just binge out on every video you make, but I can't wait to read the book when it comes out, and probably send it to 17 of my friends. So we're gonna take a brief break, though, and then find out where people can find you, follow you, work with you, get your book and then your Be It Action Items. 

Lesley Logan 32:58  

All right, Dr. Judith, you truly have given us a wealth of knowledge. Where can people connect with you, get your book. Where do you like to hang out? 

Dr. Judith Joseph 33:06  

So they can buy my book at drjudithjoseph.com or follow me on IG, Dr. Judith Joseph and all the socials they could find my book there. And if you order before the pub date, you get preorder bonuses, and I have courses on the science of your happiness and ways to take you through the five Vs. 

Lesley Logan 33:27  

Oh my goodness. Thank you so much for bringing you. You really have given us a lot, the five Vs is amazing. So if that ends up being part of this Be It Action Items, that's totally fine with me, but something that caused this podcast to exist is I would be drawn to someone and love what they said, and then going, okay, like, what is my first next step, though, you know? And so the bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted steps people can take to be it till they see it. What do you have for us? 

Dr. Judith Joseph 33:51  

I just recently did this guided meditation with Deepak Chopra, and he said something that I thought was profound. He just kept saying, lose your name and just say I am. And it's really like a part of the just be, you know, what is it to just be? And if you could just take five minutes a day just to feel your being, just to get to know yourself again, I think many of us have forgotten who we are. So if you could just be, you know, I say, be a human being, not a human doing, you could learn so much about yourself. That self-reflection time, you could practice the five V's during that time, you could just practice one, validation, right, and just be. It sounds simple, but I think it's very difficult for a lot of us to just be. 

Lesley Logan 34:40  

To sit for five minutes is very difficult. And you guys, like, what I found is like, 30 minutes is only 2% of your day, so five minutes is, like, not even a half a percent. So I don't do math well, so don't correct me. But if we cannot take five minutes for our day, we really do have to re evaluate what we're doing and who we're doing it for, because that is not the easiest thing to just be for five minutes, but ooh, I sit in a cold plunge every morning for four minutes, four minutes. And here's why, my tub is not big enough for my whole body. So three minutes with like, shoulders, hips, stomach, ankles, and then a minute for the knees to go in. And what I can say is I don't want to do it before I get in. I step in and I'm like, why am I doing this? I get in, I'm like, the air is sucked out, and then within a few seconds, you kind of settle in, and you're like, I just have to be here for four minutes. This is all I have to do. And it really is something that I'm so grateful that I do every day, because it does let me, like, set to go okay, today is today. Here I am today. I'm not even thinking about the schedule. It's just kind of like this moment and just being in this moment, where am I feeling this and how am I doing? And I highly recommend it. You don't have to get a plunge, but it just sits still for five minutes and see how you're doing. I highly recommend. I love that Be It Action Item. I think it'll be a challenge for a lot of people, unfortunately, but also I hope it's one that they take on, because I do love that. Dr. Judith, you are fabulous. I hope to one day, run into you and see what you're doing changing this world, because I do think this, your book and what you're saying are really what people are needing to hear right now. And I also just want to highlight one more time, everything you said in those five Vs is not actually going to cost a lot of money. It's like things you can just do by evaluating and addressing. So I appreciate tips like that. So thank you being you. 

Lesley Logan 36:18  

Y'all, how are you gonna use these tips in your life? Make sure you tag Dr. Judith, you tag the Be It Pod, share this with a friend, but this is a friend who needs to hear it, you know, sometimes we feel like we have to help everyone, and sometimes we can help them by sending Dr. Judith's words to them so that she can help them and you can go back to taking care of you. So thank you so much. And until next time, Be It Till You See It. 

Lesley Logan 36:39  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.

Brad Crowell 37:21  

It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan 37:27  

It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.

Brad Crowell 37:31  

Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan 37:37  

Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.

Brad Crowell 37:42  

Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.

It's time to celebrate your wins, Be It babe! In this Fuck Yeah Friday episode, Lesley shares an inspiring story of resilience from librarians saving books, uplifting wins from the eLevate community, and a personal self-care journey that’s bringing unexpected joy. Whether it's investing in your Pilates practice, embracing new routines, or simply learning to indulge in self-care, this episode is your reminder that now is the time to prioritize yourself.

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected].

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• How librarians used creativity to save books.
• A Pilates instructor’s exciting new investment in her home practice.
• The power of videotaping your workouts for self-awareness.
• Lesley’s personal self-care journey and why it’s making such a difference.
• The overall rewarding experience of her nighttime routine.

Episode References/Links:

• Librarian Vibes Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/p/DFqRH11yxZu
• Ep. 337 Ashley Black - https://beitpod.com/ep337

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSI

DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipment

Check out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper’s Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipment

Be in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlist

Be It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-survey

Be a part of Lesley’s Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/

FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/

Resources:

·        Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-g

·        Lesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/

·        Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/

·        Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/

·        Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQ

·        Profitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/

Follow Us on Social Media:

·        Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/

·        The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-g

·        Facebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilates

·        LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/

·        The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses

Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan 0:00  

It's Fuck Yeah Friday. 

Brad Crowell 0:01  

Fuck yeah. 

Lesley Logan 0:02  

Get ready for some wins. 

Lesley Logan 0:05  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

All right, Be It babe, hello. How are you? Happy Friday. So this is where I share a little bit of inspo that I got from the internet, a little bit of inspo from you, and a little bit of inspo from me, and then a little mantra. It's the Fuck Yeah Friday. If you're new to our podcast, this is our short episode. It's really a lot of fun. You never know what you're gonna get. But also, I might share one of your wins, so send them in. Literally, send your wins in. Please, come on. It's so much fun. 

So this inspired me when I was on Instagram, and it comes from librarian.vibes, and it says, librarians create fake library card to save thousands of books. I know. Isn't this amazing? So this librarian said there's nothing more sacred to a librarian than a library card. But when a town in Florida decided to burn all the books that hadn't been taken out in a while, local librarians made a fake card for one Chuck Finley, Chuck, who doesn't exist, checked out 2,361 books to keep them from being Fahrenheit 451.

So I truly love this. I love a little bit of resistance to like things that just aren't making any sense. And so may I just suggest that if you are afraid of amazing books being banned or not being able like one of the ways you can do it. I saw this other girl on Instagram every month just going and buying some of the books on the banned list, just going and buying them while they're still around where she's at, so that they stay in existence, right? So this inspired me, very inspired by it. So anyways, I hope that inspires you. Isn't that kind of cool? 2,361 books don't get burned because Chuck Finley doesn't exist. Check them out. Love that. Love that for them. 

Okay, so your wins that came through, honestly, I've spent a lot of time with my eLevators, so I'm gonna share some of theirs. So this one is from Lisa Osoteo, dear eLevator family, I'm so excited to introduce to you Esme, my Wunda chair, short for Esmeralda, in honor of her beautiful grotto, teal green color and Violet, my sumptuous Spine Corrector. I chose the colors sight unseen, just computer swatches, and when I got Violet, she lived up to her name, though, truth be told, she also gives off a Barney and Grimace vibe. So despite her proper sounding given name, she's also Biolet Barney Grimace or VBG. If she's wanting to be posh, she'll also answer to Violet Bader Ginsburg, her name when she helps me inhabit a spine of steel. I did my first chair workout yesterday on Esme, and she kicked my butt. I haven't yet to be broken in by VBG. This dynamic duo put me through my paces. Kidding aside, I'm celebrating that. One, eLevators taught me the value of a personal practice. And two, that my practice warrants investing in my own classical Pilates equipment. And three, that I have the knowledge to know which equipment I need to support an essential home practice. And finally, four, that I have this community who share Pilates equipment birth announcements. It's a thing, Esme and Violet. February 4th 2025 I mean, so fun. I wish I could post you the picture. It's just adorable and amazing, and the colors are beautiful. And now I need to get my own violet version of something for my studio. I have a grotto, and it is stunning. It is a color is worth repeating. So thank you, Lisa, for letting us celebrate the births of Esme and VBG. 

This next one is Christine Ivy, and she is one of my new eLevators, and she wrote. I videotaped myself doing the mat so I could watch and see where I am in my practice, especially in terms of stable shoulder girdle connection and back extension. It was really helpful to see evidence of where I am and what I need to work on, humbling and helpful. And I wanted to share that with you guys as a win, because here's the deal, my loves. We've all heard feelings are not facts, you know what I mean? Like, like feelings are not facts. And in our bodies, it's really easy for us to feel like we are in extension when really we're just like a PEZ dispenser with our neck, or feel like we're tall when really we're leaning forward. So I don't like mirrors in a studio, although obviously they have to exist in a little bit. But I don't love people just looking at themselves all the time. I kind of like people moving their bodies and then film something. And so at OPC, we actually let our members film themselves doing an exercise or two and send them in. And I can give feedback, because it may be that they just need to move their feet a little bit further to the right, or they need to actually reach down through their heels more, like sometimes, just need someone else's eyes to tell you what you're feeling, yes, but also here it is, and then you can find it better, and you can find it faster. And I just love that we do that. So thanks, Christine, for sharing that win because it's not easy to look at yourself and go, okay, oh, I see, I feel like I'm doing like this, but really, I'm cheating myself out of this. So thanks for sharing that. I can't wait to see how your practice continues to grow inside of eLevate. 

All right, a win of mine. So you guys, I gotta be honest, I think I've shared this part of this as a win earlier this year, but here we are in April, and this is about a year ago when, like, my lashes grew in and I could, like, finally doing it with them, but I am sharing that I have truly, absolutely loved, having fun getting to do a self-care routine that is for my face. When I had fake lashes, you can't really wash your face, you can't rub your eyes. You couldn't do that right? And so I'm obsessed with washing my face and then putting this moisturizing rinse on my eyes in the shower and gua sha-ing my skin. And I actually have learned how to gua sha with just my fingers as well, because there's ways you can do that for your lymphatic drainage. I know you're like how is this a win? It is a win because one, I absolutely love doing my makeup. I think it's really a lot of fun. I don't go off to go do my makeup. I also go out without my makeup all the time, but I am actually having so much fun getting to know myself and my look and who I am. But more importantly is the removal of the makeup and having access to my whole face and then the self care that I can do. And if you're like, wow, she's really indulging herself. Yes, I am, and I hope it inspires you, because, my goodness, we all need to be a little more indulgent about how our bodies feel. And I say this, my mean, like massaging my face. Because, my goodness, if you we talked about this with Ashley Black, the fascia person you know, spending 20 minutes like fascia-blasting your body, what that does for you. And so here I am in April, truly loving all the things I can do for myself. And I, you know, some of us like, oh, I gotta go gua sha. I've gotta go wash my face. Gotta go brush my teeth. Honestly, there's something so rewarding about cherishing all the things that I do as a nighttime routine, not only do they help me sleep, but also they really do make me feel good inside and out. So I hope that this win of me having a habit of gua sha-ing my face and loving taking my makeup off gives you some inspiration on like where you can have some gratitude, and also where you can be a little more indulgent, right? 

All right, a mantra for you. Here we go. We gotta leave you with something to think about. Now is the time. Now is the time. My loves, whatever you're thinking about doing, and when am I gonna do it? Now is the time. Here's your sign. Thank you so much for letting me share all this stuff with you. It's really a lot of fun to do solo episodes, celebrating your wins, celebrating something in my life, celebrating something that was pretty cool, that someone did. And a mantra, if you have any wins you want me to share, please send them in, because you might need to hear them today. Wouldn't it be amazing if you were having a rough day and then you heard about something you did for yourself? Bet you it would change your day. All right, loves, you know what to do. Until next time, Be It Till You See It. 

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.

Brad Crowell 8:48  

It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell. 

Lesley Logan 8:53  

It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.

Brad Crowell 8:57  

Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan 9:04  

Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals. 

Brad Crowell 9:08  

Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai

Recapping Lesley's powerful conversation with Monique Rhodes, a globally recognized happiness strategist, this episode explores how small, intentional shifts—like practicing gratitude, creating a “bubble of influence,” and embracing discomfort—can lead to greater joy and emotional strength. Tune in for Monique’s actionable steps for managing negativity and reclaiming your peace and purpose. 

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected].

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• How the "bubble of influence" creates joy for yourself and others.
• Our societal obsession with comfort and why embrace discomfort.
• How gratitude reframes your mindset and increases happiness.
• The danger of toxic positivity—and why feeling all emotions matters.
• The “Sixes Method” for letting go of stress and gaining perspective.

Episode References/Links:

• April UK Mullet Tour Waitlist - https://opc.me/uk
• April Spring Pilates Training - https://opc.me/events
• Pilates Studio Growth Accelerator - https://prfit.biz/accelerator
• Cambodia October 2025 Waitlist - https://crowsnestretreats.com
• Monique Rhodes Website - https://moniquerhodes.com
• Monique Rhodes Happiness Activation System - https://iintendtobehappy.com
• Tara Schuster's Book: Buy Yourself the Fucking Lilies - https://a.co/d/etSRpDr

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSI

DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipment

Check out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper’s Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipment

Be in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlist

Be It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-survey

Be a part of Lesley’s Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/

FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/

Resources:

·        Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-g

·        Lesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/

·        Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/

·        Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/

·        Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQ

·        Profitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/

Follow Us on Social Media:

·        Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/

·        The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-g

·        Facebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilates

·        LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/

·        The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses

Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan 0:00  

Complimenting other people actually makes them feel good, and it also reinforces your positive mindset, because it shows that you're looking for things to compliment people on, or do things for people. 

Lesley Logan 0:10  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Lesley Logan 0:53  

Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co-host in life, Brad, and I are going to dig into the gratifying convo I had with Monique Rhodes in our last episode. I was also a happy episode. It was like a happy convo. 

Brad Crowell 1:04  

It was awesome. 

Lesley Logan 1:04  

It was so, I'm obsessed with this woman. Gotta figure out how to get on a retreat with her. Anyways, you have to listen to that one. I don't care when you listen to it, but it's a must. 

Brad Crowell 1:14  

It's a directive. We're telling you, you gotta go listen to the last episode. 

Lesley Logan 1:18  

I really enjoyed. It was just so great. 

Brad Crowell 1:19  

She's very inspiring, very compelling. 

Lesley Logan 1:21  

Yeah. But also I found myself going, oh crap, I have to stop the episode. Like, I have to stop interviewing her, because it's time. 

Brad Crowell 1:29  

Oh, you mean it just kept going. You were like keep going. 

Lesley Logan 1:31  

I just kept going. I was just like, I'm just gonna keep talking. I like, love this woman. Anyways, before we get into Monique Rhodes, today is April 3rd 2025 and it's Weed Out Hate Day. It's a day that speaks of the importance of being kind and thoughtful towards others. This holiday is much needed in today's world, especially in today's world so where selfishness reigns supreme and assholes do, too. I inserted that myself. Marc Daniels came up with the holiday in honor of his grandfather, Ross Daniels, the inventor of the Ross Root Feeder. This revolutionary irrigation tool allowed nutrients to get to the deepest roots and trees of our plants, thus helping them achieve peak health and more bountiful harvest. The main goal of Weed Out Hate Day is connect gardeners and kindergarteners with the natural world while improving society in the process. Weed Out Hate Day removes the roadblocks that prevent children from achieving their full potential. Those who participate in the ceremony learn to kick out any negative influences in their lives and bring in more positive aspects. I think that's cool. I think somehow they took they're like, we take out weeds, and we are gonna help children take out the weeds in their lives. 

Brad Crowell 2:40  

Yeah, they're gonna inspire kids. I think that was really great. 

Lesley Logan 2:42  

I think so too. I think I love it so much. 

Brad Crowell 2:44  

That's a heck of a marketing team. 

Lesley Logan 2:46  

It really, really is Ross. Ross the rooter. 

Brad Crowell 2:52  

Marc came up with it. 

Lesley Logan 2:53  

I know, but his dad was, grandfather was Ross the rooter. Anyways. Well, I mean, there are certain people in this world that I think are freaking worthy of all the hate in the world. There are individual people with names we all know. But that being said, unfortunately, we live in a world where they're like just people are hating on entire groups of people, or trying to inspire hate on all groups of people. And I think we can all understand that everyone just wants love and to feel seen, and it actually is a lot easier to love strangers, than hate them. It's really freaking hard. But also, if you're like, I don't have the time to think about other people in this world, Lesley. That's fine. Remove the haters in your life. Block and bless. Goodbye. 

Lesley Logan 3:30  

Okay, we are getting really, really close to a couple April things that you need to know about, and one of them is when we go to the UK this fall. If you are in the UK or the EU and you want to join the workshops that we're doing, at two different cities, you're going to want to go to opc.me/uk to get on the waitlist, because those on the waitlist will get the early bird price, and these events can sell out pretty quickly, because they sold out last time we were there. Space is small, so we're only gonna have so many. So not only would you get the best price, but you would also get the option to actually attend, because it will only go public if there are rooms, there are spots left. So, opc.me/uk. Also happening in April. It's going.

Brad Crowell 4:10  

Meaning get on the waitlist, because if it sells out on the waitlist, then we're not even going to announce it. 

Lesley Logan 4:15  

Right, right. You'll just hear that we're going, and you'll have missed out. 

Brad Crowell 4:18  

Yep. So, opc.me/uk. 

Lesley Logan 4:21  

And we're not doing the UK in 2026 I'm going to tell you right now. So the next one, I don't know when that is. April 27th through May 3rd is going to be the. 

Brad Crowell 4:30  

Spring Training. 

Lesley Logan 4:31  

Spring Training. You guys, I just picked out the uniforms for the teachers.

Brad Crowell 4:35  

Oh, you did.

Lesley Logan 4:35  

Yeah. 

Brad Crowell 4:36  

Nice. 

Lesley Logan 4:37  

Yeah. It's like an actual baseball tee. 

Brad Crowell 4:38  

Oh, cool. 

Lesley Logan 4:39  

It's so cool. It's so cute. But now, because August is the bat dog, I feel like we need to get, like, a costume for him. I just gotta, I gotta find it out. Anyways, it's going to be April 27th through May 3rd. If you're an OPC member, it's free. If you're not an OPC member, you're going to want to go to opc.me/events to get on the waitlist, because those on the waitlist will save money on the ticket to your Spring Training. And the theme is the Pilates Push Up, and if you hate it, then this is for you. And if you love it, then we'll see you there. But if you hate it, you have to come, because whatever you hate you gotta do twice. We got not 10 classes. So there you go, plenty of opportunities to discover some love for it. 

Brad Crowell 5:15  

Opc.me/events, oh, side note, it actually wraps up on the International Pilates Day, which is May 3rd. So, how fun is that? 

Lesley Logan 5:23  

Is that possible because are we ending on a Saturday? 

Brad Crowell 5:25  

Yeah. 

Lesley Logan 5:26  

Oh, then it is on International Pilates Day. Some, in my brain we were ending on a Sunday. And I'm like, okay, somehow we got that wrong. But no, and you know what, guys? Call your friend. Yeah. Okay. Up next, Brad has something very special for the Pilates teachers and studio owners in this world. 

Brad Crowell 5:42  

Yeah, that's right. If you're feeling stuck in your Pilates business and you're trying to figure out, how do I grow, or how do I make more money, or how to get new clients, I want you to join me. Come to a free webinar where I'm talking about growth, growth for your Pilates business, whether you have a studio, whether you have a home studio, or you're taking clients and renting from someone else, it's all applicable. 

Lesley Logan 6:04  

This is all really important. It's important you know the growth that you want, and that's very, that's really important to me because a lot of companies that coach Pilates businesses, they all have one way to coach you, and it is to grow you to a place that might not be where you want to go, might mean not how you want to teach. And I just had someone DM me today that they're like, quitting teaching because they're exhausted from the model that they've been doing. She's like, yeah, I'm gonna get another job. I just can't do it anymore. And I was like, well, that's really sad. It's sad for you. It's sad for the people who could be taught by you. And if you are feeling like you're in burnout, if it keeps going the way it's going, then you actually need our help. The world can't lose you because you're the only person who can do what you do the way that you do it. So go to prfit.biz/accelerator to hear more about all that goodness, and then.

Brad Crowell 6:49  

Profit without the O, prfit.biz/accelerator.

Lesley Logan 6:52  

And then, you guys gotta come to Cambodia. I want to spend, I get to spend a week with you. It was so funny when people were leaving, I was like, oh, they're gone. There was a space missing on Friday morning. And we're like, oh, everyone has left the space for Sarah, because she had to leave on the Thursday night, well it's almost like Friday morning, so she got to all the things but the last class. And we're like, oh, Sarah's gone. And then we said goodbye to everyone, because they were leaving. And so we went off to do something, and we're like, oh, it's just the four of us now. And then the next day we say goodbye to that, last year, we're like, oh, we're alone. We're alone by now. Like, you just think, I'm a family, and it's so fun. So you want. 

Brad Crowell 7:33  

It was amazing. We had an incredible group in February. 

Lesley Logan 7:35  

Well, we already have a great group coming this October. We have people who have come before, so they're doing that second one. 

Brad Crowell 7:40  

That's right, coming a second time and bringing somebody new. A couple of OPC members are coming. Agency members are coming. Do we have eLevators yet on this one? Regardless. 

Lesley Logan 7:50  

One of the repeaters is an eLevator. 

Brad Crowell 7:52  

Oh, eLevators. Yeah. 

Lesley Logan 7:53  

You don't have to be any of those things. You can just come and then we can hang out and you can see if you want to do more things with us, or you can say that was fabulous. Thank you for my lovely vacation. Bye. Just really awesome. So go to crowsnestretreats.com to snag your spot for this October. In 2026, we're only offering the retreat one time, and so you don't want to wait two years. I'm just saying. You don't want to wait two years. Okay, we have to get to Monique, because I really want to talk about Monique, but first we have an audience question. 

Brad Crowell 8:25  

Okay. Sierra Pilates in Prague on the IG says, Hey, regarding the 100, what are your favorite cues when teaching it to beginners? 

Lesley Logan 8:28  

So everyone's obsessed with cues. I think we've talked about cues before on this podcast. There are no favorite cues for beginners. Beginners just need to do the best that they can, and it needs to be simple. So no straightening your legs across the room like a mermaid tail. That's not it. Like, honestly, it's curl your head and chest up, pump your arms up and down. Okay. Are you breathing? Breathe in, breathe out, and then give them a break, and then do it again.

Brad Crowell 8:54  

Especially for beginners, like, I'm a beginner, okay? I don't even know how the damn exercise works when the cues get complicated, I'm thinking more about the analogy or the complication than I am about the thing I'm supposed to be doing.

Lesley Logan 9:09  

And then when I say, do the 100 the next time you're like, what exercise is that? Because there was so many cues coming at you that you couldn't actually remember the name of the exercise, but the movement of the exercise to do the exercise so you can get corrections, which is, to me, what people mean when they mean cues. I think they mean like a correction or a direction.

Brad Crowell 9:27  

And I actually think that when you get to the point where somebody understands, you say the 100, and they're still doing it wrong, or they need to improve on something, the cue then that you are making it's personal to the body in front of you. 

Lesley Logan 9:42  

Way to go, babe. That's exactly it. You can't just, there could be 75,000 things you could say.

Brad Crowell 9:49  

You might end up with half a dozen different ones that you regularly use, because you see that many clients, and you see a similar problem. But honestly, it's not a one size fits all. It's literally, it's not possible for that to be the thing. 

Lesley Logan 10:01  

So I would just say, like, I actually don't necessarily have beginners lift their legs up for the 100. I also, we've talked about this before, I don't teach them in tabletop either. I just leave their legs down and I see if they can actually do the head and chest curl and without using their neck. And if they can, then when they come down, I'm like, okay, this time we're gonna lift your legs up and then, and if that goes like crap. Guess what, this time, put your legs down, pump your arms. That's what I would just say. So no cues, because they gotta know what they exercise. Thank you for that question. Send your questions and I love answering them. They're so much fun for me. Okay, now we gotta get into Monique Rhodes. 

Brad Crowell 10:34  

Yes, stick around. We'll be right back. 

Brad Crowell 10:36  

All right, welcome back. Let's talk about Monique Rhodes. Monique is a globally recognized happiness strategist and expert in mental resilience, mindfulness and purposeful living. She teaches practical methods to help individuals shift perspectives, build emotional resilience and cultivate a fulfilling life. Her work is featured in over 70 colleges and universities worldwide, which I didn't know that, that's insane, and she collaborates with leading corporations to enhance well being and productivity through her programs, retreats and speaking engagements. Monique empowers thousands to live with more ease and intention. What an inspiring conversation. 

Lesley Logan 11:15  

So inspired. I was so inspired. I've actually talked about this little thing I'm about to talk about right now, almost daily, because I just really love it. She said everywhere we go, we've got all these things that are showing us there's loads of reasons to be miserable. Like, literally, every time you open up your phone, anytime you talk to a friend, they're like, here are 70 ways to be miserable. Or if you even, hey, oh my God, this is going on, someone else goes oh, but this is happening over here. People just want to bring us down all the time, because there's a fuck ton of shit going on in this world. But you know what, you can also be happy, and there can be a fuck ton of shit going on this world. Not that you're like, the shit makes you happy, but like, you have a life that's happy and there's this going on. So anyways, she said, instead of absorbing stress and chaos, you can create a little bubble of influence that is our small ways you can create joy daily. And she talked about the bubble of influence is like us doing nice things for other people. That brings us joy, because we did something nice for other people, and it makes other people also have joy as well. And so it was really quite cool. She said there are so many small ways that we can influence our lives that we don't even think about. We can sit every day and say to ourselves, what am I grateful for?

Brad Crowell 12:19  

I feel like this is the episode that people are going to save. Favorite it, not this one, but the one before, the interview, and they're going to listen to it again and again, because I don't even remember her saying that, and I recently listened to it, right? There's so many things in this episode. I also think that in the section, she was talking about chaos and politics and all this stuff. And she said, we don't have any control over that. We don't have any control over that. My argument would be, we can participate by voting, and we can participate by. 

Lesley Logan 12:50  

Calling our congressman. But once you've done all that, that's really it. You can vote with your dollars all those things. So that's what you can do. But beyond that, I can't make the people that I voted for do the thing that I asked them to do. I can't make them so I can only do what I can do. So I can't just go, oh, I'm gonna stress around what they didn't do today. Instead, I can actually go, what am I grateful for, though? And here's what's really, gonna add to this. I'm reading another book. Buy Yourself the Fucking Lilies or something like that. Anyways, I thought it was new. It's not. It's been around for a while, but I'm gonna try to get her on the pod. I'm gonna DM her, since it's not a new book, she clearly is not busy promoting the book, but she said do a daily 10 gratitudes in your journal, so if you don't know what to journal, yeah. Tara Schuster, hi, Tara, if you're listening, I want you on the pod. Okay, that would be amazing. So buy yourself the Fucking Lilies, and I got a signed copy, by the way. I know. I just bought it off a shelf, and there it was. So anyways, she suggested in your journal just write down 10 things you're grateful for. It can be like, I'm really grateful that I painted my walls white and not the orange color that they were before. I don't know. You can come up with 10 things you're grateful for, because it does change how you feel about your day, which will change the happiness that you are experiencing in your life. 

Brad Crowell 14:04  

I also like the bubble of influence, this idea that we can separate ourselves from the fear, the chaos that is bringing us down. I thought that was really cool.

Lesley Logan 14:14  

So we talked, the bubble of influence was like a simple compliment to a someone's smile. I love your smile. And I talked about this in the pod, like, my mom has this way of like, she doesn't let a person go by without giving them a compliment. Oh my God, those shoes are so good on you. Like, this person is just walking by, but you do it too. You just did it at the airport. He does it at the airport. He's, I like your jacket. The person didn't notice. So he's like, hey, I like your jacket. And this other guy goes, who me? And Brad said, no.

Brad Crowell 14:40  

I said no. And he goes, I didn't think so as he looks down his jacket, that's not awesome. It wasn't bad, but it wasn't like complimentary. It was funny. 

Lesley Logan 14:48  

Complimenting other people actually makes them feel good, and it also reinforces your positive mindset, because it shows that you're looking for things to compliment people on or do things for people. So anyways, it's just really great. Go on, Brad. You say yours. 

Brad Crowell 15:00  

Okay, all right, all right, all right. So I really loved when she was clarifying toxic positivity, right? Because people who are happy all the time, they must just be ignoring what isn't beneficial or happy to them, like they're suppressing it somehow. And she said, whatever emotions you suppress means that you're suppressing emotions across the spectrum, right? So you can't just suppress negative emotions. If you're suppressing emotions, you're suppressing emotions everywhere, right? The way that I took this too, is like, I guess it's not possible to suppress the negative emotions and still feel the positive emotions. Is what that really meant to me. 

Lesley Logan 15:37  

Yeah, I mean, our yoga teacher, he talked about, you can't have love without hate, right? Like you can't actually experience love without having experienced hate. You cannot actually experience being healthy without experiencing sickness. So I love that her to talk about, if you suppress negative emotions, you're suppressing the emotions around that across the spectrum, so you're just starting, and then you're not going to feel anything at all, which is like, not, that's not a joyful life, either. 

Brad Crowell 16:06  

Yeah. Well, she mentioned that we are stuck on this idea that we have to be comfortable all the time. And this really resonated with me. 

Lesley Logan 16:15  

This was such a fun part of the conversation. 

Brad Crowell 16:17  

Yeah, it was, just listening, like, first off, y'all, she decided to just move to India and motorcycled around India for four years. It wasn't like I did a trip for a month, no, four fucking years. That's insane. I loved it. I think that's amazing. And she said she intentionally picked these tiny little guest houses. And she said, life was kind of crazy, and you survived on the people being generous around you, and that just she obviously is not from India, right? So she stands out, but she was able to do it, and loved it. And she said it was an absolutely incredible experience. But she said, it's not comfortable. It's literally not comfortable.

Lesley Logan 16:56  

I actually really like this. And this is going to be another shout out to the retreat, if you want to experience a little discomfort, but you would like it to be comfortable, the retreat is really great for that, because. 

Brad Crowell 17:06  

We don't have an infinity pool. 

Lesley Logan 17:07  

We don't. We have curated an amazing schedule, but we can't control the weather. And on this trip, it was 94 degrees Fahrenheit, with 50% humidity, and you would be out, and we're like, wow, but you would also be taking in all this amazing stuff going on, and so you were uncomfortable, but also enjoying yourself. And it was just so cool to watch people who like, that's not how they would choose to live. That's not how their life is. But it also shows you what you're capable of, like, I'm capable of going out sweating like a crazy person and still having a good time. 

Brad Crowell 17:40  

We do have air conditioning in the room. 

Lesley Logan 17:41  

We do. Also, the beds are extremely comfortable. I really like them. 

Brad Crowell 17:45  

Yeah. But this idea of being obsessed with comfort, and that's our society, especially in the United States, we are obsessed with comfort. We feel like we have to make things luxurious for ourselves at all times. And she said, what if you ate dinner sitting on the floor, like, you could do that in your house, where you have all the luxuries. 

Lesley Logan 18:03  

Yeah, we were in line for security, you and me in Singapore, and in Asian airports, you guys, they don't have one security system that everybody goes through. And then you're on the other side of security. You actually have to have a ticket to get into the airport, but you can go get coffee, you have a nice meal, and go shopping all the things, and then you go to your gate, and that's where there's a security thing, right? 

Brad Crowell 18:24  

So you don't do security until you're about to board. 

Lesley Logan 18:27  

So there's literally, which is so nice, because sometimes you come into the airport with something, you're drinking. So you can do that at these airports and come in with some of what your drinking. So anyways, they only have, like, four bins, and this woman, who's five people behind us, so Brad and I have our bins, we are putting our stuff in our bin. And this woman, and she was an American, and she's like, walks up to the lady who's so nice and like, getting people their bins and giving it to them and answering questions, like, we don't have enough bins back here. And she said it so loud. 

Brad Crowell 18:59  

She takes one of the bins, and clearly isn't looking, clearly doesn't actually pay attention at all. 

Lesley Logan 19:04  

So now there's less bins for the people in front of her. 

Brad Crowell 19:07  

Right, because there's only four or five in the entire security line, and they're being sent back to her on a little conveyor belt, and she snags one out of it, and the the lady that's working it like looked at her and kind of went, okay. 

Lesley Logan 19:20  

I did an audible, I looked her in the eyes and kind of rolled my eyes at her, because that was like me going, that was dramatic. That was like unacceptable behavior. And I'm now Canadian, if you're from the States, because we're not the same person. She could not be uncomfortable standing in line waiting for her turn. And so I'm just going to say, lady, if you're listening, hi, you were seen. And this podcast is for you. Learn to be uncomfortable, because you'll have, we, it was such a happy experience, I know.

Brad Crowell 19:51  

So here's, here's where we go with this, right? She said, if you're uncomfortable like that, she said, instead of letting emotions take over, which this woman clearly did, she suggests observing them without judgment. If you're feeling angry, sit with that anger. Where is it in your body? Wow, this anger is in my this is inside of me right now. It's making my shoulders tight. It's making my stomach feel a little sick. It's making me feel warm. But I'm just going to sit here and I'm going to observe it. 

Lesley Logan 20:16  

Right, because then you actually feel your feelings. You're not suppressing them, and you're also not letting them control you. You get all the benefits of all of the things, which I think is just what we all need. So anyways, you guys, next time you're uncomfortable, take Monique's and think about it. What was it? What are you feeling? Anyways, we could talk about Monique forever, but really you could just go listen to her, but before, we have to talk about her Be It Action Items. 

Brad Crowell 20:39  

Yes. So stick around. We will be right back. 

Brad Crowell 20:43  

All right, let's talk about those, Be It Action Items. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your convo with Monique Rhodes? She said, hey, to avoid holding on to negativity or stress, assess what's worth your energy. And she said, there's the sixes method, which I thought was really interesting. She said, if this thing that is bending you out of shape, will it matter in six minutes, six hours, six days, six weeks or six months from now? If the answer is six months from now, this is going to be a problem, then you can then focus on it. But if it's not, then she says, I literally say to myself, let it go. Let it go. Right? And she said you can build resilience by stepping into discomfort daily. And it's a practice, just like happiness is a practice. She suggested small daily challenges for 90 days, like trying a new recipe or taking on a different route to work. 

Lesley Logan 21:39  

Yeah, that's uncomfortable when you don't know if it's going to work or not, if it's going to make you late. I think these are.

Brad Crowell 21:43  

Yeah, it's simple and it's small. 

Lesley Logan 21:44  

You want to know what your daily discomfort challenge is. You got to tag the Be It Pod. You got to send it to us. I want to know. 

Brad Crowell 21:50  

Yeah, and what about you? 

Lesley Logan 21:51  

She said, get to know you, which I think is very bold, because I think it requires us to, like, take some time to just get to know ourselves. Know how you can do that? Get uncomfortable. You'll start to learn a lot about yourself, and then you can see how you can calm yourself down, where you're feeling things. But another way you can do it is, she talked about, like, having a three minute meditation practice where you are literally sitting still quietly, and when you do just three minutes, you start to, like, learn a lot about yourself, because like, thoughts come in. Meditation is not about like, I have no thoughts. You're actually noticing the thoughts that you have, and that's going to help you get to know yourself. So I think that that is a really cool thing to do. If you're like, well, how do you like your eggs? Do you like a window seat or aisle seat? Know, the things you like? Because then you can advocate for yourself, and you can also have better experiences that are also uncomfortable, but just you can just enjoy yourself more. I just thought, what an interesting conversation, because when I said she was a, so she was a happiness strategist, I was like, okay, let's do this because, like, episode three was a happiness strategist, right? Or a happiness expert, but this was nothing like I expected. I learned so much about how to have a joy-filled life without it being like I have a joy-filled life. Here's my halo. 

Brad Crowell 22:59  

Here's how joyful I am. 

Lesley Logan 23:00  

Oh, why? Nothing bothers me. No, she lives a really awesome life. It's and, like. 

Brad Crowell 23:05  

She challenges herself a lot. You know, she talked about being a musician, and she said you could put together a set list to go out and play, where you know the songs, and it's going to be a solid set list, she said, or you can put that song in there that's going to make you stretch for the high note, and then you can go out on stage and you can rock it. 

Lesley Logan 23:24  

Yeah. And I just think often we think happiness means having no unhappiness. But after listening to her, it's actually just having a happy life is actually really just noticing what is going on in your life, and where do you feel it, and then also, how are you giving joy to others? So go tell someone they have a beautiful smile. Go get uncomfortable. And until next time, Be It Till You See It.

Brad Crowell 23:52  

Bye for now.

Lesley Logan 23:54  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.

Brad Crowell 24:37  

It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan 24:42  

It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.

Brad Crowell 24:46  

Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan 24:53  

Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.

Brad Crowell 24:56  

Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.

 What if happiness wasn’t something you had to chase but something you could create daily? In this transformative episode, happiness strategist Monique Rhodes shares how to train your mind to find joy regardless of external circumstances. She and Lesley Logan discuss the power of gratitude, overcoming toxic positivity, and breaking free from the mental habits that keep us stuck in stress and negativity. Monique also dives into her personal journey—from struggling with depression to mastering happiness—and how you can build emotional resilience and confidence in small, daily ways.

 If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected].

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• How Monique went from struggling with depression to becoming a happiness expert.
• The difference between true happiness and toxic positivity.
• Why gratitude can rewire your brain and shift your emotions instantly.
• The 90-second rule to process emotions without getting stuck.
• The power of daily courage challenges to break out of your comfort zone.
• How social connection and community are essential for mental well-being.

Episode References/Links:

• Monique Rhodes Website - https://moniquerhodes.com
• Monique Rhodes Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/monique.rhodes
• Monique Rhodes Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/moniquerhodesofficial

Guest Bio:

Monique Rhodes is a happiness strategist whose programs on mental resilience, mindfulness, and well-being are featured in colleges and universities around the globe. She hosts the popular podcast In Your Right Mind, sharing insights on how to rewire mental habits for a more purposeful and fulfilling life. After overcoming significant adversity in her youth, Monique traveled extensively to master practical methods that reduce stress and deepen self-awareness. Today, she teaches thousands of individuals—from corporate teams to online communities—proven strategies for achieving lasting happiness, leading immersive retreats in Costa Rica, and infusing her global experiences and creativity into every aspect of her work.

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Episode Transcript:

Monique Rhodes 0:00  

I have gone from being my own worst enemy, almost critic, to being my own biggest cheerleader. So I don't actually need anybody else to bump me up or keep me going or help me. Within myself I'm able to. Don't get me wrong, I've got amazing friends, and I love them, and there are times I need to discuss things, but day to day, I've got it all here because I'm my cheerleader.

Lesley Logan 0:26  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Lesley Logan 1:08  

All right, babes, get ready. Just sit back and just really, just, this is something I want you just to, like, try not to be trying to do 17 things at once. For this one, I want you to enjoy every word out of our guest's mouth. I am obsessed with her already. I'm gonna figure out how I can stalk her and make her a friend of my life. She is a happiness strategist, and if you think you know what that is, I promise you that you don't. And if you think you know what she's gonna say, I promise you that you don't. This is a great conversation. You're gonna wanna listen to it multiple times. So here is Monique Rhodes. 

Lesley Logan 1:36  

All right, Be It babe, this is going to be a fabulous conversation. I can tell you that, because I've spoken to this amazing guest before, and it was hard to keep it contained to 15 minutes. So I'm excited that we have a longer format for conversation today. Monique Rhodes, you know what, you had me at Happiness Strategist, so can you just tell everyone who you are and how you rock at that? 

Monique Rhodes 1:54  

I love that. Lesley, I'm so happy to be here. Thank you for having our second date together. So basically, I specialize in teaching people how to master their happiness. And I've done this over the past, really, three decades, and it's all from personal experience. So everything that I teach is what I've done to turn my own life around. So I love it. I love helping people. One of my programs is in so many colleges and universities around the world. I work with a lot of corporations, and I teach thousands of people all over the world. So I love it, and I love being here to talk to you about exactly what you do so well, which is get people excited about their lives. 

Lesley Logan 1:59  

Thank you so much. I mean, here's why I'm so attracted to this, because I think today's world, it's really hard to be happy in, as soon as you open up your phone, there are text messages from somebody who's trying to make sure you know that someone's having a crappy day somewhere. There's demands from all around us all of the time. And so sometimes I do wonder, is it even possible to be actually happy? If you are happy, do you feel guilty all the time because other people aren't happy? Like I have so many questions.

Monique Rhodes 3:06  

I love it. Look, it's a really interesting point. So your point is that everywhere we go, we've got all these things that are showing us, there's loads of reason to be miserable, and that's the way that the mind works. So the mind automatically latches onto the negativity. But I really believe that you can create a little bubble of influence. It's just your bubble. We hear about the circle of influence, but literally, live in your bubble of influence. You can't do anything about what is happening in the politics in the world. You can't do anything about the natural disasters that are happening around the world, but I tell you what you can do. You can walk down the street and you can see someone that you've never met and smile and say hi to them, or go to the cashier at the supermarket and say, wow, you look so beautiful today. Well, how's your day going? There are so many small ways that we can influence our lives that we don't even think about. We can sit every day and say to ourselves, what am I grateful for? I mean, I can sit here right in this moment and just say to myself, What am I grateful? I'm grateful that next to me there's a glass of water, because there are so many people in the world that don't even have access to fresh water. I'm so grateful that you and I get to meet here, and we get to have this conversation. Because of the advent of the Internet, we have the ability to meet this way. I'm so grateful that I woke up this morning and I'm not in a war zone, because so many people in the world are so when we start to think about it, when we start to look at it and see being alive is one of the most unbelievable miracles, and what we do is we get ourselves caught in this kind of they call it hedonic adaptation, where we actually miss it. We've got so much stuff that we have that brings us comfort and happiness that we don't even see it anymore. And so what our brain latches onto is the novelty. And the novelty is often the negative. Oh, that person's going through this or this is happening. Oh my God. Look at the news. Oh my God. So getting ourselves into a place where we see that the novelty is actually all around us all the time is a really powerful way to lift down happiness levels. 

Lesley Logan 5:24  

Oh my gosh. Okay, so many little takeaways there. First of all, anytime someone reminds me about being grateful, I am reminded that judgment and gratitude can't live in the same space, and so it's just starting to be grateful. And I love that you brought up like I'm grateful for this water, like I'm grateful if I have windows right now, in this moment, it is raining, and I love sunshine, but I'm so grateful that it's raining, because I live in the desert and we haven't had rain in 225 days. You know, finding because it's so easy to go, oh no, it's raining. I can't take the dog like you can always find those. So I find that that gratitude just starts to uplift. But I do love how you talked about the bubble of influence, because I think you're correct. Like, we start to go, oh my gosh, all this bad stuff is happening, and I can't do anything. And how is this affecting me? And how you start to do that? But my mom is one of those people who, when we go out, she finds a way to compliment strangers, every stranger walking past them at a hotel. She's oh, my gosh, I love those pants on you. And I'm like, I was in the middle of a conversation. And she just does that and so naturally. But I think because so few people do that, how they can touch someone's life in a way that they feel so seen, and we don't know who they are and how that could affect the rest of the world if we each hit our bubble, I imagine that there's a domino effect, that it gets bigger and bigger together.

Monique Rhodes 6:36  

You know, when I was a kid, my best friend's mother was very, very beautiful. She was a model when she was younger, and whenever you walked in the door at her house, she would look at you, and she would say to you, darling, you look absolutely gorgeous. And I remember as a kid that didn't come from a very good background, I would just melt into that. And sometimes I would show up, literally, looking as though I just rolled out of bed, but I knew that deep inside of her, she saw me, or I believed that she saw me. It was such an incredible gift that she gave, and it's something that I really focus on is giving that gift back, because we know when someone says it, I ran into a woman the other day. I haven't seen for a year. I only met her briefly once, and she saw me and she said, You look fantastic. And I walked away and went, ah, look at that. I mean, how good does that feel? There was no payback in her for saying it. She just said it, and how beautiful it is when we're on the receiving end of it. So whatever it is that we want in our life, we have to give it. If we want more love in our life, we have to give it. If we want the joy and the beauty of life, we have to show each other what it is that's how we lift our happiness levels. Don't wait for everybody else to make the world better. You know, there's stuff going on. There will always be stuff going on in the world until the day we die. But it's not about what's happening. It's about how we're responding to it. And we can always see the light. We always can see the light. And Lesley, I'm not saying that we bypass stuff in the last few months. You know, two of my friends have died, and it's not like, oh, I go, whoa my friends have died, and I'm still really happy. I am still really well, and I grieve and I feel it, but I don't let it control me. I allow the grief or I allow the difficulties and the challenges to be there. But my resilience is really strong because I also, alongside it, allow myself, even when there are difficult things happening, to see the beauty of my life and the world at the same time.

Lesley Logan 8:55  

You know, I'm so glad you brought that up, and I want to get more into happiness with you. But what I fear people take away is that toxic positivity? I'm sure you've heard of it. I lived in LA for 15 years, and living four hours away and watching the city of my memories burn, you know? And there are people who are like, ready to go, but now they'll get to rebuild back better and all this stuff. It's like, yes, is it too? What is the difference between happiness and seeing what is possible and toxic positivity?

Monique Rhodes 9:22  

Well, I think there's something really interesting that it's absolutely vital that we understand, is that whatever emotions you suppress means that you're suppressing emotions across the spectrum. So if I'm someone who says, whoa, I'm just positive all the time, and I don't look at the negative stuff. You actually don't really feel good all the time. So it's really important for us to understand if we want to experience joy and happiness and wellness, we have to be comfortable with experiencing discomfort. I mean, that's it. Otherwise we're just bypassing the whole thing. So I'm a really big teacher of take all your emotions and experience them and feel them. You don't have to act out on them. If you feel angry, sit with the anger. But where is it in my body? So this is the key, Lesley, is that to not run with the story. If I'm angry, to sit and go, wow, this is really interesting. I'm going to look at my anger and to shut down that story that says because he did this, and da, da, da, da, to sit there and go, oh, this is anger in my body, and it's making my shoulders tight and it's making my stomach feel a little sick and it feels warm in my body, and I'm just going to sit and observe it that is allowing the emotion. I don't know if you've ever watched the very famous TED Talk by Jill Bolte Taylor called My Stroke of Insight. It's really phenomenal. So Jill Bolte Taylor was a neuroscientist, and she had a stroke, and she watched herself have the stroke. It's really extraordinary, really worth watching. But one of the things that she discovered was that an emotion has a 90-second shelf life. Any emotion has a 90-second shelf life. So this becomes really interesting, because what we can then understand is if I do feel anger, and I have anger come up and rise up, and there it is. If I'm able just to sit with it for 90 seconds and allow it and observe it and let the story go in 90 seconds, it's going to be over. What is the only thing that keeps it going is this. I'll give you an example. I'm driving to work, and some idiot in their Range Rover cuts me off, right? And all of a sudden I feel this rage because I've got a fright, and I'm like, oh my God, that idiot in his Range Rover. And then I'm driving along, and I'm thinking about it. I'm thinking about it. Then I get to work, and I walk in the door and I say, you'll never believe what happened. And all of that fear and anger is boiling up again in my body because my mind doesn't know the difference between the experience it's remembering and the experience it had. So those emotions are still exactly the same. And then my partner calls me, and I say to him, oh my God, you would not believe what happened, right? Instead, I could have the experience. Allow it to happen for 90 seconds. Feel the anger, feel the fear, calm myself down. Let it go. Let it go.

Lesley Logan 12:38  

Oh, what a different day you'd have. Your work day would start off in a different space. I'm loving this. I can see my husband and I just setting a timer for each other, like, oh, okay, here's 90 seconds are on the clock. I'll come back.

Monique Rhodes 12:55  

You're at 93 seconds. Shut it down. It's really interesting, because when you do this, Lesley, what you start to understand is that you go through your day so often feeding negativity, and you start telling stories. Oh, you wouldn't believe what happened to this person and all of that. So if we can actually learn to shut up and just be very mindful about our conversations and say, Well, I can have those conversations if they're constructively looking at how I can solve a challenge. But so much of our conversation is around this happened, and you wouldn't believe it, and that happened, and our brain is creating imagery inside itself and reliving these experiences. We literally create so much of our stress and anxiety for ourselves. It's not even happening out there. It's happening in here.

Lesley Logan 13:53  

And also the person who cut you off doesn't even remember doing it. They've moved on.

Monique Rhodes 13:59  

No, it's interesting. I have a really good strategy that I use, which is this, when something happens that I have a relatively strong emotional reaction to, I ask myself the question of sixes. I can't remember where I first heard this. It might have been Brené Brown that first spoke about it, but I say to myself, will this matter in six minutes, in six hours, in six days, in six weeks, in six months? If it's six months or more, I say to myself, I need to pay attention. If it's less than six months, I literally say to myself, let it go, if there's nothing that I can practically do to work with it, if it's nothing that needs to be solved, or maybe I've done something that was wrong and I need to look at that, that's fine. Then I go away, I take responsibility, whatever it is, and I do the work on myself and otherwise it is a let it go. Do not waste your energy on it.

Lesley Logan 15:05  

Mind blown. And I love this so much because so as a recovering perfectionist, I'm someone who like, some days when I make a mistake, I can let it go, and some days I almost keep playing it in my head over and over because I'm upset at myself for the mistake that I made, or not seeing that that could have happened or been taken a certain way. And so I replay it, and I replay and then I get angry about their responses, and I get angry that I'm angry, and I do the whole thing, but I can imagine if I had just run through like, is it gonna matter in six minutes? Matter in six days, six weeks, six months? I bet I probably would've get to most of it not mattering at six months, I bet you it wouldn't, and so then I would probably not have to suffer. I could probably enjoy the yoga class I was taking while I was running through all that in my head.

Monique Rhodes 15:52  

But I might even have an added bonus for you, Lesley, is that your perfectionism served a purpose. You learned when you were a child that if you were perfect, you received love for it. And so that is where this behavior comes from. I keep doing this because I learned as a child that if I was perfect, I had to be perfect to be loved. I call it the Love Contract. And so one of the most powerful things you can do in those moments is not only say, does this matter? No, it doesn't. I'm enough as I am, and to love yourself in that moment, in your imperfection, and to know that your being perfect is not a direct line to being loved. Does that makes sense? 

Lesley Logan 16:42  

It makes so much sense. And I feel like every listener who is a perfectionist recovering, we attract a lot of them here is like, kind of mind blown, because I do think that their perfectionism is what's keeping them from being happy. I'm sure you have plenty to say on that. And I think that in their desire to not be a perfectionist, I don't think that they're approaching it, because I know I'm not with just saying I am, I'm worthy of love like I'm enough right now, I don't think that's how we're approaching it. I think people who are trying not to be perfect are judging how much they let their perfectionism get them for the day. So I feel that that is such a good takeaway to, one, appreciate what you did as a child, because it was a survival thing to feel loved. And we all need to feel loved, to grow and get to where we are, and then to not judge ourselves for that, but instead welcome and have gratitude for who we are today and that we are enough in the moment that we are. I think what a great action step people can take that changes the emotions in their body. 

Monique Rhodes 17:37  

Yeah, and to know that everyone does it. So every single one of us has learned one powerful strategy to get loved, and it could be I'm going to really excel at school, or I'm going to take care of people. You know, there's so many ways that this particular thing plays out, so that every single one of us, not just perfectionists, all of us, have something that we learn as a child will elicit love for us, and it's a really powerful thing. And then to look at that and go, does this still work? Actually, being a perfectionist is causing me all sorts of problems. I want to do really well in my life, but I've got to understand it's not that I need to be perfect, it's that I need to be loved, and we all need to be loved. So then we've got to go to the root of the tree and see how can I be loved without relying on being perfect to get it? 

Lesley Logan 18:31  

Oh, everyone, write that in your journal. That's the next thing. Okay, I feel like I got so excited about all the things you have to say. I'm just like, obsessed with how much you know on this. But how did you get here? Like, how did you get to be, you know, the expert in this area, what was the journey? 

Monique Rhodes 18:46  

Yeah, well, one of the beautiful and painful things about this journey of it was mine, Lesley. So I grew up, I was adopted at 10 days old, and I grew up in a very, very difficult situation in my family life. There were lots of really, really bad things that happened. And when I was 19, I ended up in a hospital having tried to take my own life. And I remember sitting there and saying to myself, this is going to go one way or the other. Either I have to give up or I have to do everything to heal myself. But I didn't really know what healing myself meant, because I saw, it appeared that everybody else was really happy, and I seemed to be the one who was broken and struggling. So I made a deal with myself that I was going to do everything that I could to try and heal this and myself. So went on a mission, and a little bit like an Olympian would, I did everything I did every therapy under the sun. I tried every technique. I traveled all over the world, really looking and seeing myself, but trying all sorts of methodologies to see what I could find. And probably the most powerful thing that I learned that encompassed a lot of what I teach is that happiness is not outside of me. Of course, there's lots of wonderful things. You know, I'm sitting here looking out at the ocean. I live here in Costa Rica in the jungle, and it's awesome. But actually, what is happening in my mind is the dictator of whether I'm happy or whether I'm suffering. And that was such a light bulb moment for me. And so then the focus came on, okay, so if it is about my mind, then what can I do to train and tame and optimize my mind so that I can live a really happy life? And the end result is that sometimes I think I'm annoyingly happy, you know, and it's like, I can't actually believe that this kind of happiness that I experience is possible, but it is, and now I have the incredible honor of teaching other people how to do exactly the same thing. Because for me, there was no path. There was no one saying, you do this, this and this. And so for me now I'm able to create that path for other people so that they can change their lives as well. And that makes me even happier, you know, because that's one of the things about happiness, is when you're in service to others, you know, taking care of other people to some degree, not at the expense of yourself, but to some degree, is one of the things that adds to your happiness. So I don't know, I just have this really amazing, amazing life.

Lesley Logan 21:24  

Wow. I think so many people could look back at part of your story and then feel sorry, but also how much of that took for you to be where you are and to share that with all of us. You know what I mean? If you didn't have that hard of a life and you didn't have that experience, would you have had the drive to figure that out, you know?

Monique Rhodes 21:42  

And I would just be teaching a theory, I would just be saying, well, you can do this, whereas I can tell you with 100% certainty, because I've seen it with so many of my students, that what I did with myself is something that can be replicated. And so when you go from being in a hospital at 19 in absolute despair, to waking up every day excited about the day, feeling like, oh my God. Does it get better than this? I know that those two states are possible by working with my mind. That's it. 

Lesley Logan 22:18  

I'm really obsessed with this because I find, like most of my day, I do things that make me feel good, the way I wake up in the morning. I'm really, I'm so intentional about my morning routines, I might drive people crazy when I travel, because I'm like, no, you can't walk with me. I have to go for my walk. I need the sunshine. I need to do these things. But I know that, like, those things that I do are actually helping me get into my mind, find the happiness, get present. I have ADHD, and also an Aquarian, so I'm just like, air sign in my head. So I like, need all this, and so I'm obsessed with the different things that you've talked about, because there's so many of these things we can do that are free. And out of all the people that I've interviewed, at some point, you're like, paying for something. And obviously you probably have amazing tools we could all buy, but also giving a compliment to someone doesn't cost you anything.

Monique Rhodes 23:04  

And also, that means that happiness is available to everybody. It's not something that is only available to people with loads of money, but the media teaches us that it is because it's always trying to get us to buy something. So the truth is, is that there is no difference between me and a beggar in the slums of India, where I've spent a lot of time. There's no difference. You know, I remember the first time I really started to realize that the story wasn't as simple as I thought was the first time that I went to Thailand. It was my first time in a third world country, and I remember going through these canals in Bangkok, and I remember seeing a guy, and he had four bamboo posts and a tarpaulin over the top. And I remember him sitting there with this big smile on his face, and he had a little bag of belongings beside him. I remember thinking, I think that's the happiest guy I've ever seen in my life. And I didn't get it. I was young, you know? I didn't get it because everything I'd been led to believe was money, success, fame, power, that's where happiness lay. But what we actually see is that so many of the people that have fame, success, money and power, are freaking miserable. They're some of the most miserable people. And yet, I've spent a lot of time in India. So I traveled through India for four years on a motorcycle as part of my journey by myself.

Lesley Logan 24:30  

That is so cool. 

Monique Rhodes 24:31  

Right? And one of the things that I found was that, my God, the Indian people, some of the poorest people, so generous, so loving, so kind, would literally give you the shirt off their back, so much happier than the people in the West. I remember when I went to India, and the first time I came back and someone said to me, I don't think I could go to India. And I was like, why is that? And they said, because I couldn't handle the poverty. I said, you know, what I realized from living in India for so long is that the mental poverty of the West is way more painful than the physical poverty of places like India. We live with so much comfort, particularly in the United States, completely comfort-obsessed and the levels of stress, anxiety and depression are through the roof.

Lesley Logan 25:24  

Yeah. I mean, we go to Cambodia, we have a helm there, and I am always amazed by the smile on the faces of people who sleep on the floor, and the generosity, because they so want to show you their life, and the generosity of them feeding you with the food that they really can't afford to have, but also it would take away from their joy and their happiness to not do that. So it's very interesting thing, and it makes you go, I'm judging them, but they're actually happy. They're actually happy. And I'm the one who's so concerned and so worried about all these different things, and that's from the Western mentality of growing up. And I'm a Pilates instructor as well. And the amount of people that cannot handle discomfort in their body, they're like, oh, that really hurts my ankles. And I'm like, pain, like, we're gonna break them, or just uncomfortable. And it's most of the time it is just uncomfortable. And I'm like, so this is a workout, and we have to be uncomfortable to change the body, otherwise, you stay the way you were and you came here for something different. So, you know, I think it's really interesting how many of us cannot handle discomfort in so many different ways, not just in the way we travel, but the way we move our body, the way we want our day to go. We don't like when anything gets out of the way, because then it's going to affect things. But also, even if everything went perfectly. They're not happy anyways.

Monique Rhodes 26:41  

Think about the culture of the United States as an example. Right? Whenever I go to the States now I think about it. You have very comfortable cars. You have very comfortable wide roads. You have the comfort of going to all these shopping malls everywhere. You have the comfort of being able to order anything up to your house if you can't even be bothered walking out the door. You know the thing is, is that when you live in a third world country, like I live in Costa Rica, which is like a poorer country, and it's so beautiful, the other day, I was down at the beach and I got a flat tire, and I needed to go home and get something to change the tire. Because I do want you to know that I can change my own tire, even though I've got a big truck, because I live somewhere where you need four wheel drive. Anyway, I needed to go home, and I didn't have my phone with me because I was at the beach, and there was just this guy at the beach, and he had a little stand, and he just packed his stand up, got me in the car and drove me home. And I was like, I loved it. I loved it. Like it really put him out, and it was for no reason but the kindness. And what happens is that when we live in a world that doesn't have all of the comforts, people rely on each other more. When you get into a first world country, people are relying on each other less. They wake up in the morning in their little bubble, and then they get into their little bubble, and they drive to their little bubble, and they do their work in their little bubble, and then they go home and they watch TV for the rest of the day, you know? And it's like, actually, what we need is connection. We need community. We need belonging. We need to be with each other and interact with each other and get off our phones and actually see people, because that is what brings the nervous system down. That's what makes us well. So we kind of look at the West as this ideological state of, wow, look at all the stuff we've got, but all of it actually is taking away so much from the things that actually make us happy. 

Lesley Logan 28:41  

It is, oh my gosh, it really is. As we're recording this, in two days, I get to go to Cambodia, and I'm so excited because I just needed to be too hot, too humid, and I need, I need to be freaked out a little bit about making a left hand turn into oncoming traffic, like I need. There's something about getting out of all the comfort that we have here to remind ourselves, what do I truly need anyways? And what I love about it is because there is so much less distraction. It's every sunrise and every sunset is beautiful. Every rooster that wakes you up is the coolest thing. The wedding that goes until three in the morning, you're like, who's getting married right now? Because you don't have these other distractions. There's something you can see the beauty in all of these things. And so I do think it's a challenge, though, because so many people are afraid of letting go of their comfort. I guess I'm wondering, do you have like, baby steps for getting uncomfortable?

Monique Rhodes 29:36  

I want to point out that the Pilates lady is more than likely uncomfortable in lots of ways. So she will avoid discomfort all over the place. She will not tell her husband that she's unhappy in her marriage. She will let her kid rule her rather than tell her kid off. There'll be a series of things that she does. It's really important we can handle discomfort. So one of the first things that I'm going to encourage people to do is to travel. Traveling is incredible, and I have traveled all over the world. And I'm going to say this just I'm going to tell you this truth for fun, I've slept in the slums in India, and I have spent weeks in a castle in Switzerland, and the truth is, is that it's all the same at the end of the day. There's nothing about the castle in Switzerland that was any better than the slums in India. So get yourself into places where you go somewhere like maybe go to Mexico or something. Don't stay at a fancy resort, stay at a little guest house. That's what I did through India for four years. I just stayed at little guest house like I literally lived on about $500 a month. That's what I lived on. Ate simply, lived simply because. Why? Because it made me strong. Made me stronger. If I can handle physical discomfort, I can handle emotional discomfort. So that's the first thing is to start to look and see maybe I can travel differently, or maybe I can think about, what are all the things that I have in my house that create comfort? What if tonight I sit on the floor, or what if tonight I give up something? You know, that's a really powerful thing, is to say to yourself, What could I give up for a week? Maybe I'm going to give up the dishwasher for a week, which, to me, is funny, because I don't have a dishwasher here. Maybe I could give up TV for a week. Maybe I could give up driving for a week. I don't know, choose something that's manageable, and give it up for a week, and then you start to appreciate it, because all of a sudden you don't have it. And that's a really powerful way so that when it comes back, you all of a sudden, are like, wow, I have this whole new appreciation for this thing, and to really make that correlation between discomfort and the ability to handle it equals strength. So you might even have a little journal for yourself where you say, every single day, I'm going to do something that makes me uncomfortable. I'm going to make that phone call that I don't want to make. I'm going to compliment someone in the street. Whatever it is, it's a muscle. It's literally, the muscle is courage and if you can build that muscle of courage, then you can handle any discomfort. You can literally put me anywhere with anybody, and I can handle it. And I know it from so many years of traveling solo around the world, but that wasn't just oh, it's just because it's who I am. It's because I've built the muscle of courage, and I consistently look for ways that I can flex it. If there's something that I'm afraid of, then I'll go, oh, here we go. Okay, I live in a country that has a lot of spiders, and I don't like spiders. I can actually handle a tarantula in my kitchen these days. I mean, how amazing is that? I don't even know how to, I don't know how to do that because it's just courage to tell a different story. It's all it is. That's it, Lesley, it's just a story. What story do I tell? Do I say to myself, I'm going to break my ankles in the Pilates class or do I say to myself, I'm strengthening them? Do I see someone in the street and think to myself, I'm too scared to tell them how beautiful they are? Or do I think to myself, this isn't about me. This person is going to feel amazing when they hear this. So, so much is the stories that we tell ourselves. You get to choose the story you tell yourself, but always flex that muscle of courage like your life depends on it, because it may.

Lesley Logan 33:54  

I mean, I feel like courage is to be happy, and this life is courageous because it goes against the grain of what everyone is telling us, we should be we should be suffering, we should want for more, we, we don't have enough. And what I'm hearing you say, because I was really excited about this conversation, because I do wonder, like, can you truly be happy? And is happiness like being in the clouds? Like, do you know what I mean? Like, you have to ignore everything just to be happy. And what I'm loving from you is it's actually being in it all. In fact, go being the thing that makes you scared or makes you nervous or feels uncomfortable, and what can you become grateful for? Because that's where you're going to become happy. 

Monique Rhodes 34:35  

And also, think about it, Lesley, whenever you do something that you were afraid of and you managed to do it. There are very few better feelings in the whole world than that. So what the other side of fear there is often a feeling of incredible, sometimes exhilaration, but deep joy and happiness in yourself, because you start to see what am I capable of, and we're always so much more capable than we ever give ourselves credit for, or that anybody ever told us we were. Whenever I'm with my friends' kids, because I don't have kids myself, my sole goal is to show them that they are way more beautiful, wonderful, intelligent and capable, then they may see themselves at the moment. My only job is their honorary auntie. That's it. Is to show them possibility. Who's going to show you possibility? Well, you can show yourself possibility. Well, okay, so how do I do that? Well, every day, because this is the key is that happiness is a habit, so you've got to do habitual stuff. So every day you sit down, you set yourself a little challenge. You say to yourself, Okay, for 90 days, I'm going to sit down every morning, and I'm going to challenge myself to one, one thing. For 90 days. I'm going to do a courage challenge for 90 days. Discomfort courage challenge, or I might call it a possibility challenge. Okay, well, I'd like to learn how to change a tire. I'm like, oh, I'm going to do it. Go onto YouTube. So easy, right? If you don't know how to do it I'll make you a video, because I love changing tires because that's what you learn as a young New Zealander growing up, your dad always teaches you, so you never get yourself in trouble how to change the tire, right, or it might be, oh, there's something on my computer that I don't know how to do. You know that I'm struggling with. Okay. So learn it. Learn it. Move yourself out of this discomfort. So I'm often giving my students 90 day challenges. That's what I love doing. Give them a challenge for 90 days and say, let's work at this. I'm working with one of my students now who literally is working with discomfort so she can build that muscle. She's a friggin CEO of a company, big company, but she shies away from a lot of that discomfort and kind of manages things. So now it's who am I if I step into it, does it matter if I can't do it? Because that's the fear, because she's super capable. What if I can't do it? If I can't do it, I bypass it, I shy away. So now we're stepping her into 90 days of things that she can't do, and she is just loving it, because there's a whole other element of herself that's coming out and is so powerful. Imagine for 90 days doing every day, doing one little thing, one little thing. Tonight, I'm going to make a new recipe for dinner, or today I'm going to go to a different Pilates class, or I'm going to go a different way to work just those little things that take you out of your habitual comfort ways all of a sudden, without even realizing it, your confidence starts to grow because you're moving yourself in directions that you didn't actually realize. You didn't realize you were caught in a little box. 

Lesley Logan 37:59  

Yeah, it's a muscle we all need. It's often what's keeping people like, we call this, be it till you see it. It's the confidence. And I'm like, well, how are you gonna get confidence unless you do the thing you know, like you're born with confidence. I don't think so. I think you could have parents or people around you who remind you that you're doing things that are hard and amazing, that you're confident. But I find that the things that I do that are not things I was trying to do. I do them scared, and I know a few things about myself. I don't quit. I will figure out an answer, and if I don't like it at the other side of it, then I don't have to keep doing it. But right? But like, I'm gonna give it a go. I'm gonna give it the best shot. And then you get a confidence in the area, and it covers you into other areas you feel like you're not going to be confident, because you have evidence that you can do things that are hard, you can do things that are scary, you can do things that are uncomfortable. And that's part of the happiness. You know? 

Monique Rhodes 38:49  

But there's a payoff to it. It's really interesting because before I started teaching this, I was a singer, and I toured all over the world. When you go out on stage, and I've been on stage where the, you know, there's been 10,000 people and just me and my guitar. You go out on the stage and you've got two choices, and it's a hard choice. One, I can do a really good, solid set. I can do a good, solid set where I know all the notes that I'm going to sing and it's going to be safe, and that's what life is like. You can go through your life and you can say, I'm going to do a really solid set with my life. It's not going to be amazing, it's going to be good, but I might feel a bit meh, it's going to be good. Or you can go out on that stage and you can say to yourself, I'm going to go for it. I am going to go for the phenomenal, for the extraordinary, which is what I chose. I said to myself, when I got out of that hospital, I said, I want an extraordinary life. That's what I wanted, and that is what I've had, and that is what I live and I have to be comfortable with falling flat on my face. I have to be and the truth is, is that the weird thing is, is that I so rarely do. That's the weird thing, is that it's the times that I fall down are so much less than I ever would have I would have thought it'd be 50-50, it's not. It's probably about 1% of the time that I've flat on my face. And I'm really comfortable with it. I'm really good with it. Because the payoff is, is that I'm hitting the high notes. I am hitting the high notes, and I'm having this life that is awesome and fascinating and interesting, and I thrive in it. And so we've got to understand that it's a choice. So we've got to get comfortable with discomfort so that we can go for the high notes. If we're not comfortable with discomfort, we're always going to shy away and go for the comfort.

Lesley Logan 40:40  

Oh yeah, Monique, I could talk to you for hours, but I've learned so much. I'm reminded of things that I've always wanted to do, or I used to do, and I feel like this is just such a solid, I feel like everyone's getting something from this. We're gonna take a brief break and find out where people can find you, follow you, work with you. 

Lesley Logan 40:56  

All right, Monique Rhodes, where do you hang out? And we know you're in Costa Rica, but can people connect with you online? Can they work with you? Where's all the good stuff?

Monique Rhodes 41:03  

Yeah, absolutely. You can come to Costa Rica. I do retreats down here because I live the dream life Lesley, one of the most amazing retreat centers in the world, is five minutes from where I live. It's called Blue Spirit down here in Nosara in Costa Rica. So I host retreats here every year. But also the easiest way to come and find me is I have a website called I Intend To Be Happy, and that's the place that you can come and find me and start working with me. And I just love nothing more than helping people shift their happiness and really understand it. Listen, Lesley, if I can do it, anyone can, I'm no genius, I'm no superstar. I'm just a 19-year-old kid that wanted to change her life and managed to do it.

Lesley Logan 41:47  

Oh yeah, everyone, please go and you know, let me know how it goes. I'm also going to look at your retreats, because I've been itching to get to Costa Rica, and I feel like this is a sign. Okay, you've given us so much already, and so feel free to remind us what you've already told us, or any bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted steps people can take to be it till they see it. What you have for us?

Monique Rhodes 42:06  

I just think that it's really important to get to know you, to know that we live in a world that will consistently distract you from getting to know you. And one of the most powerful gifts that you can give yourself is to say, listen, there's a lot of noise out there. Let me, and you might have to do it gently, slowly but surely. Let me take time where I'm not running away from me. And I think that's one of the most powerful things, because the more you get to know you, and I know sometimes we think, by get to know me, I'll be afraid of me, but you won't be and to really just every day, take a little bit, take three minutes and just sit quietly or learn a meditation practice, just to get to know you. If you do that, it will change your life. I know myself so well. I have gone from being my own worst enemy, almost critic to being my own biggest cheerleader. So I don't actually need anybody else to bump me up or keep me going or help me like within myself, I'm able to, don't get me wrong, I've got amazing friends, and I love them, and there are times I need to discuss things, but day to day, I've got it all here because I'm my cheerleader. I'm the one that knows me best, and I'm the one that can help me along the path. And I think it's a really, really important thing for each of us to understand. Don't fall into all the distractions of the world. They're literally taking over your mind. Take your mind back. Take your power back. That's where it lies, right, right here.

Lesley Logan 43:43  

Obsessed with you. Love you already, and you don't even need my compliment, because you are already happy without that. Everything about this is fabulous. You guys. How are going to use these tips in your life? I want to know. Monique wants to know. Please share this with a friend who needs to hear it. Honestly, especially those friends you care about, who you sometimes feel like you're avoiding because they are a downer on your day. They probably need to hear this the most, and then you all can have a bubble of influence. I'm just, yes, thank you, Monique, for this and everyone, until next time, Be It Till You See It. 

Lesley Logan 44:14  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.

Brad Crowell 44:56  

It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan 45:01  

It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.

Brad Crowell 45:06  

Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan 45:13  

Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.

Brad Crowell 45:16  

Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.

Lesley Logan shares how setting boundaries and streamlining her time allows her to focus on what truly matters. After a year of planning, she’s finally implementing a major shift in her workflow—proving that progress happens on your own timeline. She also highlights a listener’s journey of refining systems that fit their unique needs and the power of small shifts that lead to big wins. Tune in for a reminder that celebrating each step forward fuels the path to balance and success.

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected].

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• Why embracing boundaries can create more time for what matters most.
• Lesley’s long-awaited shift to a new workflow and the power of follow-through.
• Listener’s inspiring journey of refining systems and owning what works for them.
• How small, intentional changes can lead to greater balance and efficiency.

Episode References/Links:

• Female Invest Instagram - https://beitpod.com/goodall

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox. https://lovethepodcast.com/BITYSI

DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipment

Check out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper’s Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/memberships/perks/#equipment

Be in the know with all the workshops at OPC https://workshops.onlinepilatesclasses.com/lp-workshop-waitlist

Be It Till You See It Podcast Survey https://pod.lesleylogan.co/be-it-podcasts-survey

Be a part of Lesley’s Pilates Mentorship https://lesleylogan.co/elevate/

FREE Ditching Busy Webinar https://ditchingbusy.com/

Resources:

• Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-g
• Lesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/
• Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQ
• Profitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/

Follow Us on Social Media:

• Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lesley.logan/
• The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-g
• Facebook https://www.facebook.com/llogan.pilates
• LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-logan/
• The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses

Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan 0:00  

It's Fuck Yeah Friday. 

Brad Crowell 0:01  

Fuck yeah. 

Lesley Logan 0:05  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Lesley Logan 0:48  

Hi, Be It babe. How are you? How's it going? Today is your Fuck Yeah Friday. It's the last one of March. Forgive me, on the start of March, I should have been like we're celebrating women, and I really did without even knowing that, because, you know, it's a women's month when it gets close, right? But like, I'm recording in January. And then we started this month celebrating a woman who people were tearing down based on her personal choices, and she had so many accolades. And then we honored two other amazing women. One was just a really great reminder to us all about courage and confidence, and the other was a beautiful child who is autistic, who wanted to have a celebration for her uniqueness. And today, I think is a great FYF to have with who's going to inspire us. 

Lesley Logan 1:31  

This lady's, this is amazing. I almost like want a poster of this in my office, not even a lie. From Jane Goodall, and she said, "It actually doesn't take much to be considered a difficult woman. That's why there are so many of us." Right? Right? So I just thought that that was just a wonderful little thing that we could all just giggle about, because don't we like change how we do things, or change the pleasantries on things, just that we aren't considered difficult, right? We do this all the time. So anyways, thank you, Jane, thank you for that. Thank you for reminding us that it doesn't take much to be considered difficult, because that's why there's so many of us, right? So anyways, if that resonates with you, just remember, you're not difficult. You actually have very amazing, I think the opposite, the, if a male will be difficult, he'd be someone who knows what he wants, right? So I just think that you're not difficult, that you're someone who is clear on your boundaries and know what you want. That's amazing. So, thank you, thank you for that, Jane. 

Lesley Logan 2:27  

Okay, your wins. This is where we're going. Your wins. So I'm going to read from Kelly Nyhan, and this is from the fall, and we got a lot of wins in here, so here we go. First win. I got through all of my emails. I love reading all the newsletters from LL, truly, and one, had my win listed, which is about updating my logo, and I'm feeling so proud. Yeah, that's why you send them in. We celebrate you, and then you get to see them, right? Number two, I'm a bit on the ADHD side, and I have such troubles getting focused and making a plan of where to put everything, notes, ideas, tasks. Anyways, I ordered a planner that I think could help me, and I'm 99% committed to reviewing it each morning and evening. I like digital first sessions and appointments, but I need a place to handwrite everything else. I also took time to visualize how and what. It's really the most debilitating thing for me. It was never a problem, and now after menopause, it's literally ridiculous. Three, finally woke up at my desired time of 5:30 am and did a brain dump of anything and everything. I got to get on paper somewhere and out of my head. I feel a little embarrassed to admit all of this, but happy that it's all in a safe place. I also evaluated my night rituals. Thanks, LL's newsletter, geez, these really helped me think about things. Thanks. And so true, I love getting up early, cheat the day, but for some time now hitting snooze. I think it's because I didn't have a morning routine that I was excited about and felt like it's too many tasks burning me. Well, now I have a handle on them, and today I got up with enthusiasm. Number four, I got a new person in my Mindful Mover Zoom class. It's very much an invite only. Basically, it's referral. So this is so great. And one of my students is coming with a friend for duet, starting November, weekly. And I'm thinking that in the spring, just because it's too cold for snow for the 70 plus age group to drive here, but in the spring, a small group of Pilates group circuit, where they really know the names the exercises thanks to eLevate. Last but not least, sent all of my remaining payment reminders for 2024. Yes, I'm getting a better system to send them before the second to the last and recruit day and requiring payment on a specific day, I take checks and sell only, so I still have to do it manually. It's fine for me for now. Kelly, there's so many great wins in here, and I just want to highlight a couple of them. You do not have to go I've been on the ADHD side. Having ADHD is a superpower. Knowing how you move and operate is actually superpower, right? So it's not the ADHD that's the superpower. It's like knowing how you learn, how you operate, how you do things. That's the superpower. So celebrate that. And also, I love that you're not being perfectionist about checking the thing 99% a way to go, way to be honest with yourself. I love that. I also love that you figured out how to wake up at your desired time. I think we overwhelm ourselves with all the things we have to do, and so then we just go, I don't want to do any of it. Well, you actually have to figure out a way positively to welcome in those things that you want to do. That's how habits are truly made. So congratulations. And I also am grateful that you know that there's little tidbits that you get from the newsletters, that's why you read them, because they help you, right? And what you don't need to do and what you are getting so much better, it's like overwhelming so with all of the things, so way to celebrate that, and I also just want to celebrate like, way to figure out a system for taking your payments and also owning that like, manual that works for you right now. If that's what works, that's what works, right? Just because there are technologies and systems and if this, then that things that are out there, it doesn't mean that it's easier for you to use them. For example, I love to write, so yes, there's chatGPT. There's even a bot on profitablepilates.com there is a bot that's trained of 10 million of my words from podcasts, from courses, coaching calls, seven years of coaching calls and Slack, 10 million of my words. I certainly could say to my own bot, write me a post about this, and I don't, because even though that would be, in quotes, easier, it takes away the joy that I get from doing it. And there's certain things, even doing something like sending payment reminders, there's something in that that's bringing you joy, and that's why you do it a different way, and that's okay. So thank you for letting us all learn from you and be on your journey with you. It's really beautiful. 

Lesley Logan 6:17  

My win. Last April, I heard about a way that my assistant could take over my inbox. I think it was April or May. And I even have the book, and I have all the things, and I just hadn't taken the time to figure it out. We had so much other things going on, and while it would have saved me time to do that, it would have taken more time to do it. So I was just like, no, I'm going to read this book at the end of the year, beginning of the new year, and I will implement it in Q1. So, I can proudly say that here we are the end of Q1 and my assistant and I are implementing this where I am not in my inbox everyday, I actually get to go in there and just read the things that she needs me to respond to and it's not because I don't want to hear from you. First of all, none of you email me. You all DM me, or if you're a member, we talk in our community places. So it's not about putting a barrier up to other people. The reality is, is that an inbox it's like I'm giving away my feelings of the day and how my day will go to random people who are asking for different things that have nothing to do with each other, all at the same time. There's so many different things in an inbox that can take over the day, right? Whereas, if I have my assistant go through my inbox each day and either respond, delete, or put in a folder for me to respond to, it can be more on my timeline, a.k.a boundaries. So while, by the time this is placed, it's been more than a year that I've thought about doing this, that's not the point. The point is, and the win is that I gave myself a deadline, gave myself a timeline to do it, and got my team on board to do it, and now it's being implemented, and it will take some time. You know, it takes some time to build a new system. I'm not really good with details, so we'll see how this goes. But I really am excited to have more time to be creative and to be in my communities that I've built, because that's where I want to play. I want to play in my communities. I don't want to read an email from a random person who bought my email off a list, who's trying to sell me on why someone should be against my podcast. I want things filtered so I can look at those at the time that I want to look at those, so I can spend the time for the people that I do this for, which is you. So anyways, that is my win, implementing something I wanted to do around the time that I wanted to do it. Boom. We did it. 

Lesley Logan 8:38  

All right. Here we go. Let's see, what are we taking away? What are we taking into this weekend? What's our poem, mantra, affirmation, thing to think about? My well-being hinges on being able to hold what hurts, love what's being neglected, and enthusiastically work with what I've got. Well, that's pretty cool. My well-being hinges on being able to hold what hurts, so not hold on, hold what hurts, love what's being neglected and enthusiastically work with what I've got. Here's to not waiting for everything to be perfect and working with what we got. You are amazing. I adore you. And until next time, Be It Till You See It. 

Lesley Logan 9:19  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.

Brad Crowell 10:02  

It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan 10:06  

It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.

Brad Crowell 10:11  

Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan 10:18  

Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.

Brad Crowell 10:21  

Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.

Are your eating habits supporting the life you want to live? Lesley Logan and Brad Crowell break down key takeaways from Lisa Salisbury’s interview, focusing on mindful eating, food habits, and breaking free from unconscious patterns. Learn how to assess your hunger, build a better relationship with food, and take control without guilt or restriction.

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] .

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• The emotional connection to food and why it matters.
• How childhood conditioning impacts your eating habits.
• How to break free from the Clean Your Plate Club mindset.
• The importance of avoiding extreme hunger or fullness.
• A simple two-bite challenge to help you check in with your hunger.

Episode References/Links:

• eLevate Retreat - https://lesleylogan.co/elevate
• Mullet Tour - https://opc.me/uk
• Spring Pilates Training - https://opc.me/events
• Pilates Studio Growth Accelerator - https://prfit.biz/accelerator
• Cambodia October 2025 Waitlist - https://crowsnestretreats.com
• Ladder Barrel Exercises - https://beitpod.com/barrelexercises
• Lisa Salisbury Website - https://wellwithlisa.com
• Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/well_with_lisa
• Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/wellwithlisa

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected].

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.

DEALS! DEALS! DEALS! DEALS!

Check out all our Preferred Vendors & Special Deals from Clair Sparrow, Sensate, Lyfefuel BeeKeeper’s Naturals, Sauna Space, HigherDose, AG1 and ToeSox

Be in the know with all the workshops at OPC

Be It Till You See It Podcast Survey

Be a part of Lesley’s Pilates Mentorship

FREE Ditching Busy Webinar

Resources:

• Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!
• Lesley Logan website
• Be It Till You See It Podcast
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube
• Profitable Pilates

Follow Us on Social Media:

• Instagram
• The Be It Till You See It Podcast YouTube channel
• Facebook
• LinkedIn
• The OPC YouTube Channel

Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan 0:00  

Are you actually connecting to the food that you're eating, and do you know why you eat the way that you eat? I think these are really interesting questions to ask yourself, because if it is getting in the way from you having the life you want to live, or it's becoming a crutch of some kind, it's worth evaluating. 

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co-host in life, Brad, and I are going to discuss the liberating convo I had with Lisa Salisbury in our last episode. If you haven't yet listened to that interview, you should listen to it at some point, because it's so good. Before, during after, go back and forth between the two. You do you, you. There's like different ways of doing everything. And this is episode 503. 

Brad Crowell 1:19  

503 

Lesley Logan 1:20  

And we just said a big thank you before we hit record with you guys, to our amazing production team, because we've had the same producers this whole time. There's podcasts I listen to of people that I really admire, and every other year they're with another company. And I'm like, you know what? Why are you with so many different companies? What? 

Brad Crowell 1:38  

That's weird. 

Lesley Logan 1:38  

Now, if it's because I read that you scored $170 million you do you, no jealousy, no judgment, no curious. I see it, not announcing, if they're not paying you to be there, why are you switching? What's going on? Anyways, just go out of your minds. 

Today is March 27th 2025 and it is Scribble Day. Yep, Scribble Day is observed on March 27th annually, and it's all about celebrating the creativity and the art associated with scribbling, which anyone can do, regardless of their artistic abilities. So the last time you scribbled aimlessly to relieve boredom, you might have probably not known that there's actually a day to celebrate the stress releasing act of scribbling.

Brad Crowell 2:18  

Yes, our production team is gonna go, Brad, why did you adjust Lesley's microphone while she was talking? So that was me, my fault, and I don't think they're gonna be able to edit it out. 

Lesley Logan 2:27  

No. And guess what? 

Brad Crowell 2:28  

100% they won't. 

Lesley Logan 2:29  

I just didn't want it, I didn't want to stop. I was I hadn't made a mistake, I hadn't made a mistake on any of the sentences. And I wanted to keep going. 

Brad Crowell 2:36  

Well, you nailed it. You slayed that. 

Lesley Logan 2:37  

Also, I really appreciate that they mentioned that, like, it's regardless of your artistic abilities, because, I often am disappointed in my, here's the thing, this is the recovering perfectionist in me who is letting it go that you put your hand in front of the camera to pick the mic. I don't think my scribbling is good. 

Brad Crowell 2:55  

But it's a scribble, it's not supposed to be good. 

Lesley Logan 2:57  

I know, but I want it to look pretty. There's people who are like. 

Brad Crowell 3:00  

Is scribbling pretty? 

Lesley Logan 3:02  

No, but people can draw like, really pretty hearts and stuff. My hearts are like, my star, I look, I just look like a seven year old still scribbles. 

Brad Crowell 3:10  

Fortunately, there's a day for that. 

Lesley Logan 3:11  

There's a day for it, and actually it, there's no, because it's just, it's relieving boredom, and I think it's great. So anyways, also, if you are bored in today's day and age, we want to hear you on the be it pod, because we need all your tips.

Brad Crowell 3:26  

No, I think it just means that they don't have a smartphone.

Lesley Logan 3:30  

Yeah, they don't have their friends, literally. 

Brad Crowell 3:33  

They don't have the easiest-to-distract-yourself device in the history of our world. 

Lesley Logan 3:38  

I know. You know what, on a podcast I listen to, they talk about, apparently, your phone can tell you how many times you pick up your phone. This one guy, he picked it up 273 times in a day. 273 times in a day. How many minutes are in a day?

Brad Crowell 3:50  

All right, so we're gonna figure this out literally right now. So we're gonna go right now. Okay, go to Settings. Go to screen time. So just search for screen time. If you all want to join us on this, if you have an iPhone, go to your settings and go to screen time you're gonna look at.

Lesley Logan 4:05  

Today, I've only had 67 pickups. Oh, I went. 

Brad Crowell 4:08  

See all app and website activity? Okay. And then go to day.

Lesley Logan 4:16  

Yeah, pickups, yesterday, I only did 109.

Brad Crowell 4:19  

Oh, mine is 109 also. What the? Mine's today, though.

Lesley Logan 4:24  

Okay, but mine today, I've only had 67.

Brad Crowell 4:26  

Oh yeah, yesterday I did 136.

Lesley Logan 4:28  

Okay, so here's the deal. I think that's a lot. I don't know, but if there's 24 hours in a day, not that we only pick it up once in an hour, but kind of like, maybe we should try to get it under 100. Let's try. Next time we get to a topic that has to do with boredom, we'll let you know. We'll update you. Anyways.

Brad Crowell 4:45  

My screen time yesterday was almost 10 hours. 

Lesley Logan 4:49  

Yeah, but we can't judge we were on a plane, you guys, playing video games for 15 hours. So I don't think that. 

Brad Crowell 4:54  

That is true. 

Lesley Logan 4:55  

But okay, anyways, just going back to the boredom thing. So figure it out, because I actually heard one host was like, I have 88 and he was surprised by 88 and to me, like 60, because we work on our phones, I don't think it should actually be nothing. 

Brad Crowell 5:08  

It's a little hard when I'm like, on an hour long zoom call on my phone.

Lesley Logan 5:12  

Yeah, but maybe we could figure out a day off. Maybe we should find a day off average and then take our weekday average and try to get it just a little bit more than a day off average. Okay. 

Brad Crowell 5:22  

We'll see. 

Lesley Logan 5:22  

That has nothing to do with today's guest or Scribble Day. Hey, we're back from P.O.T. Denver and about to kick off our annual eLevate retreat. You guys, oh my God, it's like, literally, in three days. They're like, coming here soon. I'm so excited. We, I have so many prizes for them. We have a special guest for them. We have, I mean, I can't even wait. So anyways, I'm stoked to see them, we have 17 eLevate grads coming. If you want to come to an eLevate retreat, you have to be an eLevator. If you want to know how to be an eLevator, you need to go to lesleylogan.co/elevate. Okay, Brad's not happy with the mic still. I'm talking right at it. I don't know what else to do. Okay. Also, you guys coming up very soon, in April, we're going to be announcing our second Mullet Tour. It's that UK tour we did where we do business in the morning and Pilates in the evening.

Brad Crowell 6:09  

It's business in the front, Pilates in the back that's why it's the Mullet Tour. 

Lesley Logan 6:15  

And we're doing two cities for this tour, and it's going to be this fall. So you want to go to opc.me/uk to be on the wait list, because those on the waitlist are going to get invited to the early bird. And you know what? It could sell out on early bird. So you want to go to opc.me/uk to get on the waitlist. So you get the early bird special. 

Brad Crowell 6:31  

Spots are definitely gonna be limited, because we're, you know, we're doing it in some studio. 

Lesley Logan 6:36  

It's when we do our (inaudible). It's like they're just small spaces, and we're only doing two days, I think one day in each city. I'm pretty sure it's of almost. 

Brad Crowell 6:43  

Two days in each city, pretty sure. 

Lesley Logan 6:45  

I don't know. I feel like it's a tight squeeze. Just get on the waitlist and you'll find out. If you're in Europe, you should come, just fly over. 

Brad Crowell 6:52  

Go to opc.me/uk for anyone, anywhere. Coming up at the end of April, we've got our spring training. This is the first time we've ever done this before, and we're focusing on drum roll, please. The Pilates push up. 

Lesley Logan 7:08  

The Pilates push up. So if you hate them, this is for you. If you love them, this is for you. We're gonna have 10 classes over the course of one week, all to help you get the most out of your push ups, either to make them more accessible or more possible, or help you realize, like, how freaking strong you already are. Don't worry if you don't have the equipment, we have a mat ticket as well. So go to opc.me/events, because that's going to get you on the waitlist. And those on the waitlist are going to be invited early, and those invited earlier are going to get a better price, than those who are not on the waitlist. So if you're an OPC member, you get the best price. It's called free.

Brad Crowell 7:42  

So if you want it for free, join OPC. If you want it for free, join OPC.

Lesley Logan 7:48  

Yeah, yeah, okay. But that's going to be in April, and it will end on International Pilates Day weekend, which we're very excited about. 

Brad Crowell 7:56  

Yeah, go to opc.me/events and then, if you are a Pilates business owner and are taking clients in any way, shape or form, whether that's in the park or at your house, in a studio, and you're booking and taking payments from your clients. I want you to join me on the next upcoming Studio Growth Accelerator and what we're going to do is talk about the three massive secrets that Lesley and I have figured out after coaching more than 2500 businesses just like yours on all the things over the past, geez, seven plus years now, we've boiled it down to three major things that you need to understand in order to grow your income as a business owner, it's totally free. I want you to join me by going to prfit.biz/accelerator. That is profit without the O dot biz slash accelerator. You'll find out when the next webinar is, and come join me. Finally.

Lesley Logan 8:49  

What we just, like, when we're recording this. We're literally 24 hours back from Cambodia, but we want to invite you to the next time we're going to Cambodia for our Pilates retreat. There we have classes, we have breath work workshops. We have workshops that will help you love your life and have a lot of fun. We go on Temple tours. We have the most amazing schedule, I'm just gonna say, literally during the retreat, multiple times, multiple people said, I just really love the schedule of this retreat. It's so nice. 

Brad Crowell 9:16  

Yeah, the flow of the events. 

Lesley Logan 9:18  

The flow of it. It is. 

Brad Crowell 9:19  

If you've ever been on a retreat and they had events lined up from six in the morning till like midnight, and you just completely fried. And the things were good, but it was just too much. We don't do that. If you've been to other retreats where they're like, we're so happy that you're here, you've got an entire day to yourself. Yeah, we don't do that either. It's a great balance, right in the middle. 

Lesley Logan 9:39  

Like the little, most perfect schedule. 

Brad Crowell 9:40  

Y'all, we've done like, a dozen of these, so it's been a lot of making adjustments. And in fact, every single time we do a retreat, we evaluate it and we say, did we do it the way we liked it? How did it go? And we're at the point now, y'all where, literally, we have the timeline of events completely dialed in, and what we just did three days ago was we sat down with peach, who is part of our group over there, and she is part of the team that helps take care of us, and we said, hey, we want to rearrange the temple tour visits and see if we can't add in yet another temple in there. And we figured out a way to do it. So we're really excited. It's the temple that Lesley and I haven't even visited yet it's exciting, so. 

Lesley Logan 10:21  

Yeah it's really, really cool. And so just we want you to come. And I have had so many people say the next one, the next one. I've told someone like you said the next one three times. I know we have so many things coming up, so I want you to know something's always going to come up. There's many fires all the time. So go to crowsnestretreats.com because we want you to come on this next one, which is in October. And I'm telling you, we had two people sign up very last minute. We had someone who signed up five months in advance, which I guess is not last minute. We had someone sign up two months in advance, so you can sign up. And we've also had people, most of them are people with children who've come on their own because they deserve a week where we fill their cup for them. So come to crowsnestretreats.com to snag your spot. All right, we have so much to talk about Lisa, but we have an audience question to answer? 

Brad Crowell 11:08  

We do. Ashley Crosby from Instagram says, hi, Lesley, I'm back with another DIY question. Do you have any good recommendations on a DIY video to make a Ladder Barrel rung cover? I've been taught to use a blue knee pad to support our feet, but I have tiny feet and the pad makes me feel less secure. Do you have any suggestions? 

Lesley Logan 11:28  

Yeah. So in this question afterwards, they sent me a bunch of other information about why this blue knee pad situation is happening. So first of all, if you are a Pilates person and you've used a Ladder Barrel before, this is what we're talking about. We're talking about in the ladder barrel there are rungs on the ladder, and you have to put your feet on these rungs. And a lot of people are taught to hook their feet on the rung. So if, like, you're watching on YouTube, it's like that hard flex, kind of like you do at the gym, to, like, stick your feet underneath a bar, to kind of hook in, to do sit ups, because your feet keep coming off the ground. That's kind of what we're talking about here. That being said, that's not actually how you're supposed to put your feet. You're supposed to. 

Brad Crowell 12:02  

Oh for Pilates Ladder Barrel you don't, you're not supposed to hook your feet. 

Lesley Logan 12:05  

No, you shouldn't hook your feet. 

Brad Crowell 12:07  

Wait, sorry. So I don't, I don't even understand where this blue knee pad would go. It's supposed to go between your foot and the foot bars to hurt, to protect your foot? 

Lesley Logan 12:14  

Yes, so your foot's not pulling up against like wood, so the pad's there.

Brad Crowell 12:19  

So you're not even supposed to hook your feet. So this entire purpose is this blue knee pad is irrelevant?

Lesley Logan 12:23  

Yes, but they're doing it because they think that hooking the foot is safe, and then people complained about the wood hurting their feet, so they're like, let's put a pad here. 

Brad Crowell 12:32  

And then it's still unsafe. 

Lesley Logan 12:34  

Well, and it's unsafe for this person, but also it's not helping you get the connections you need. So when you're doing short box on the Ladder Barrel, which is when this would happen, you're actually supposed to stand on the feet. So you want to put your feet on not the top top rung, but the second rung, or you can even go lower. This is in my flashcard. This is in all my tutorials free. Put the arch of your feet on there, like you're doing bird on a perch during footwork. And then you push, not so much that you're straightened, but kind of like if you were, like, doing a wall squat, you know how like you, like, are pushing into the floor, but you're stuck in a wall squat, you want to push in them so your butt turns on. And if you hook with your feet, it's really hard to get your butt to turn on, and then it's unfortunately, going to help turn on your hip flexors when you're coming up and down, versus keeping your butt on. So Ashley, here's the deal, if you have to do these things because it's rules of studio, pay attention to the rules. But if you have the ability to do it the way that it's meant to be done, then your tiny feet are not an issue, because this, that whatever part of your arch can go on the bar is what you need. It's all you need. 

Brad Crowell 13:41  

It's all you need. 

Lesley Logan 13:42  

And if you want to go to onlinepilatesclasses.com/ladderbarrelexercises. 

Brad Crowell 13:48  

No, it's slash ladder dash barrel dash exercises. 

Lesley Logan 13:52  

Correct. I was going to say with a hyphen in between all the words. 

Brad Crowell 13:55  

Yeah. onlinepilatesclasses.com/ladder-barrel-exercises

Lesley Logan 13:59  

Yeah, you can see all of our exercise. You'll see how my foot setup is. And know you, so don't, you don't need.

Brad Crowell 14:05  

They're all the videos that you would need. They're all the DIY videos. Well, they're not DIY videos for making a Ladder Barrel rung cover, because you don't need a ladder barrel rung cover at all. 

Lesley Logan 14:14  

Some people have created one that is made out of like a sheep's skin or sheep fur, whatever, because that's like, antibacterial, antimicrobial, anti whatever. At any rate, some people have made this, I find that they're quite slippery. And again, you don't need it. Why are we buying things we don't need when you can just use your muscles. So full permission to use your muscles. Brad is trying to look up different things, you guys, they're like, legit. So they're like, they're like. 

Brad Crowell 14:43  

50 bucks for a little piece of cloth that wraps around your barrel.

Lesley Logan 14:47  

Yeah, yep, yep. Oh, you know what you could get? The cover that I use to do back squats, the cover that you use to do back squats, I bet would work. I bet it would fit, because it's Velcro. And that was, like, $12 or $25 online. So I guess if you are like Lesley, I'm adamant I have to hook my feet, you don't know what you're talking about, then you can do that. You could probably use a back squat rung cover. Anyways, there's just so many different changes that people have made to the practice, and it's not about classical versus contemporary. It's just like people changing exercises because someone complained about things. And it's like, maybe you're not doing it right, or you might not be ready for it yet, and that's a different story. So hopefully this saved you money on a pad you don't need. Send your questions in and we'll answer them. 

Brad Crowell 15:33  

All right, stick around. We're going to be talking about Lisa Salisbury and her tips on food and how we treat food in our lives. 

Okay, welcome back now. Let's talk about Lisa Salisbury. Lisa is a certified Health, Life, and Weight Loss Coach, holds a BS in Health and Human Performance and is the host of the podcast Eat Well, Think Well, Live Well. Lisa is passionate about helping people build a healthier relationship with food and regaining control of their eating habits. Whether weight loss is the goal or not, she focuses on self awareness and creating sustainable strategies to foster a sense of balance and well being. 

Lesley Logan 16:10  

Yeah, I thought that she was very fascinating. There's so many different ways that you can address this topic, and I just really appreciated her like enthusiasm and love and kindness and grace around it. And she said, food is connection. It always has been, even in our hunter-gatherer days, they ate together. For her, every meal should be enjoyable and delicious, not just thought of as fuel. And I kind of like this, because a lot of times the way to break your emotional connection to food is to go food is fuel. Food is fuel. And it's not your comfort food. But for her, she was like, no, no. I mean, it's fuel, but every meal should be delicious and it should be enjoyable. And something since we just got back from Cambodia that this makes me think about is we set the table for every meal, right? In Cambodia, we put placements out, and we put the silverware out, and we put napkins out, and every meal had colorful fruit and we had this beautiful ambiance. It's really interesting how on a retreat, every meal was kind of an event. And of course, the food was delicious, and we all ate together. And like, we sat there and we ate together, we talked. And like, we have an hour for food because we take a good half an hour because we're just all chit-chatting and like, talking about things and getting to know each other more. And no one's on their phones, because we're all eating a meal together, right? And so she emphasizes that value of family traditions to create meaningful meal time moments, meaningful meal time moments. 

Brad Crowell 17:32  

The Triple M threat. 

Lesley Logan 17:34  

Yeah, she sets a table properly, and you sit at the dining room table, and she believes that the act of eating together is more important than what we're eating. And I thought that's so cool, because we've had different guests on before who were like, do you ever just sit and eat your meal, or are you like on your phone while you're eating your meal? And one of the things that I think is causing people to overeat or be hungry all day long is that they're actually not eating the food that they're eating when they're eating it, they're kind of just doing other things, and they're not paying attention to it. But there's something about we slow we slow down, we chew our food. We like taste the food when we're having a meal with people, and it creates connection. And I think a lot of people are just missing connection these days. And I think you could do this, even if you're single. You can also, oh my God, for my single people here's what you can do, you can set a place for two, because the other place could be little you creating space for a partner, and you could be going through the act of taking the time to put a placement out for that, like, whatever you want to do, but like, you could do that, and then you could sit there, and you could enjoy the food, and you can have beautiful music playing, or maybe beautiful flowers to look at, and just actually enjoy your food.

Brad Crowell 18:42  

I think it's great. I mean, I love the intention as well. Of the two placemats, you know, you're setting it for the future person. That's really cool. I know you used to do that with coffee. 

Lesley Logan 18:50  

For you. 

Brad Crowell 18:51  

For me, yeah.

Lesley Logan 18:52  

I mean, you, it wasn't for you first. It was just for the person who's going to be here. But then you took the coffee so, you know, anyways, what did you love?

Brad Crowell 19:01  

Well, actually, I wanted to just comment. She said a couple things about how we were trained with food that I didn't see in my notes. So the idea that when we were kids, if we were causing chaos, maybe our parents were like, here, eat a fruit, roll up and shut up. Or, hey, you did a great job. For example, my parents, when we scored a goal in the soccer game, we went and bought Domino's Pizza. 

Lesley Logan 19:27  

That's, yeah, that's what everyone does. That's the problem. Like, there's a reward for.

Brad Crowell 19:32  

That's the thing, is like for our parents what it was was we don't go out to eat. We will go out to eat when you score a goal. But what's also happening there is food is becoming the reward, even though that wasn't actually the intention. Yeah, the intention was, we're gonna splurge, and we'll splurge.

Lesley Logan 19:51  

And also that's the same thing, like, you have a bad day at school, and someone said something you're bullied to, and then the parents, let's go get ice cream, instead of feeling the feelings of what it's like to have been bullied at school.

Brad Crowell 20:01  

Yeah, or celebrating a moment such as square goal. But it made me wonder, this is the first time I ever thought about that. It made me wonder, has that affected my eating habits? I do think it is real, the Clean Your Plate Club situation that she talked about that blew my fucking mind. I was like, oh my God, this is crazy. I don't know why my parents said there are starving kids in Africa. I didn't know why, until that podcast, when she said we used to ship the food to Africa in the 80s. I was like, what, we did?

Lesley Logan 20:30  

Right. My parents are the same thing, and we did ship it. We didn't ship the food that was on your table, though, but it caused me to feel like I have to eat everything on the plate. And now, you don't, I mean, don't be wasteful. 

Brad Crowell 20:42  

But the idea was, because we were intentionally shipping food around to share the food with the world, we should be eating all of ours. And, you know, it was just an interesting idea. It comes from the World War One and World War Two, the Clean Your Plate Club, and they literally rationed food in the United States, and so that was a thing. And it's funny. To me, it's like the leftover hoarding is like a big thing from the Great Depression, because people wanted for everything. They had nothing and so they. 

Lesley Logan 21:13  

And you might need it, you would never get rid of it, because you might not be able to get it. Yeah, and I do think that some of these things have been passed down without us knowing why. And here's the deal, obviously, don't be wasteful with food, but also like, you know, you start to learn like, oh we don't need to make that much food.

Brad Crowell 21:27  

Oh, I've got to eat everything on my plate. Fascinating that this is like a generational, passed on, generational thing, and today the meaning of it is completely disconnected with the intention of it originally, and so now it's just clean your plate, because that's what you're supposed to do, you know. And so we get into this habit of eating that isn't necessarily healthy from either a mental or a physical perspective. 

Lesley Logan 21:51  

It's not helpful whether it's healthy or not, because maybe you're, maybe you're. 

Brad Crowell 21:55  

It could be healthy if you're doing small portion sizes, but because in the United States, portion sizes are so huge, it might not be normal.

Lesley Logan 22:02  

I know. I was thinking about our dinner in Singapore, and I was, we're like, oh, these is like Vegas prices for this meal. When the food came out, I was like, this is not a Vegas plate. So Vegas prices, but we got, like.

Brad Crowell 22:13  

Smaller portions.

Lesley Logan 22:15  

But it was also enough. It was also enough. So I think that that's really true. I just all of this is not to say, like, what's healthy, what's not healthy. It's like, are you actually connecting to the food that you're eating, and do you know why you eat the way that you eat? I think these are really interesting questions to ask yourself, because if it is getting in the way from you having the life you want to live, or it's becoming a crutch of some kind, it's worth evaluating.

Brad Crowell 22:38  

Yeah. I mean, the why, it's the why are you eating? And you know, she said it could be because you're bored or sad or frustrated or happy celebrating. She highlighted that for many it's not about weight loss, but it's about feeling like they're the ones making the decision, and not the food making the decision for them, I think we need to put that in context. It's about feeling like they're the ones making the decisions, so probably like I'm deciding to eat now, it's not that the food is making decisions for them, but it's just about control.

Lesley Logan 23:08  

The habits that we create for ourselves, there's no such thing as a good or bad habit. There's also no good or bad foods, right? There's just is how you are eating and how is it affecting your life, in the way that makes you available to do the things you want to do. And so if you are someone who, like, literally is craving sugar and it's distracting you from the things you want to do, so much that you actually are, like, going out and hunting for sugar, which is like an actual thing, because it's an actual food addiction, because your gut starts to crave sugar and tells you this, and you cannot stop thinking about it. And so then you can't actually write the email to the person want to pitch an idea to, because you're like, I just need to get that. Well, that's affecting your life negatively. And these kinks can be a distraction from what makes us have the energy to want to work out our gut literally tells us a lot, like, our gut microbiome tells us a lot, and what you eat trains your microbiome. So it's a whole other thing. I just thought it was really cool.

Brad Crowell 24:00  

Stick around. We'll be right back. We're going to talk about those, be it action items, and we're going to dig into the hunger scale, which is pretty cool. 

All right, let's talk about those Be It Action Items. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your convo with Lisa Salisbury, she mentioned she teaches the hunger scale to her clients, and it goes from negative 10 all the way to positive 10. And she said, negative 10 is like starving yourself. Positive 10 is gorging, where you're very, very full. Negative 10 very, very hungry all the way to very, very full. And she said they're equal distance from zero, which is neutral.

Lesley Logan 24:37  

Which I loved. I loved a neutral, instead of it being like a one to a 10 or a zero to a 10, five is the place to be. I love that. She was like, no, I'm gonna be make this as a neutral.

Brad Crowell 24:48  

Yeah. And she said negative 10 and plus 10 are equally uncomfortable. Right? Well, first off, the purpose of it is to build awareness of your hunger and your fullness level throughout the day, right? So she actually charts it. She tells her clients, especially if you've been measuring your macros and you're used to tracking all the stuff and weighing things and whatever. Instead of tracking all that stuff, track your fullness level. And here's how to do it, before each male pause to assess your hunger on this scale, she says, start eating when you're feeling like a negative three, right? When you're just mildly hungry, that's the nicest time to start eating. Stop eating when you're at a plus three, which she describes as you're not really feeling any pressure, you're not wishing you had stretchy pants. You're just comfortable. And she mentioned there's a moment when the body takes a pause, and it's this organic thing where you're like, you know, I'm starting to feel satiated, right? She said, avoid eating when you're overly hungry, negative seven or below, or if you're too full plus seven or above. And you know, obviously, to avoid eating at negative seven, that means you have to have eaten sooner. If you're at a negative seven, you probably should be eating.

Lesley Logan 26:00  

But maybe, like, have a little snack before you like, sit down for a full meal. 

Brad Crowell 26:03  

I found that interesting too. She had a whole comment on that. She said, why are we snacking? If we're hungry, we should eat a meal.

Lesley Logan 26:10  

Well, that is actually also interesting. I agree. I have a friend who has a bunch of kids, and she and her husband, they make meals for the family, right? And so one of our kids came home from school and was like, you know, hey, I'm hungry. Can I have this to eat? And so the dinner is at six. If you think that that's going to hold you over till six, then yes, but if you think that you're going to be hungry between that and six, then I want you to think about what would make you satiated till six. And they were like, oh, oh, this isn't gonna be enough. And they actually, like, made half a sandwich so that they were enjoying it. So anyways, I thought that was a cool way of looking at what are you snacking on? Do you need a snack or do you really need to eat? So my biggest takeaway, she advised on eating the amount that's right for your body, paying no attention to food scales, paying no attention to the scale in your kitchen. You can do this by just experimenting with bites. And she talked about the two bite challenge. So we have another challenge for you. Leave two bites at your plate at every meal and see how you feel looking at that food on your plate. Reflect on the experience. Do you feel satisfied or still hungry? Experiment and check in with your hunger afterwards. Remember that this isn't about wasting food forever. It's about learning what you need and putting yourself in charge of your portions. And I think this is also this is also just really cool, because we all need different things at different times in our life. So how you ate at 20 is gonna be different than what you need at 30, it's gonna be different what you need at 40, it's gonna be different during a crazy work schedule versus summer time, you know, vacation time. So I think it's just about connecting with your body and noticing, am I hungry? Really? Am I just bored? There's two bites on my plate. Am I full or am I hungry? Oh, I'm hungry. Okay, I'm not giving myself the portion sizes that I needed so that I would not be a negative seven when I wake up. So it's all just important information for you, so that you're not distracted by your tummy when you're trying to make things happen in this world. I'm Lesley Logan. 

Brad Crowell 27:58  

And I'm Brad Crowell. 

Lesley Logan 27:59  

Thank you so much for joining us today. I hope this is a really amazing I hope this got you thinking about you and what you're eating and how you eat it and enjoy it. If you have questions about it, feel free to let us know. If you want to send this to a friend, that would be amazing. We're working really hard and going from a 1.5% podcast to a 1% podcast. We can only do that if you download it. So share this with a friend and until next time, Be It Till You See It.

Brad Crowell 28:19  

Bye for now. 

Lesley Logan 28:21  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.

Brad Crowell 29:03  

It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan 29:08  

It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.

Brad Crowell 29:13  

Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan 29:20  

Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.

Brad Crowell 29:23  

Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai