Be It Till You See It

Do it anyway... in the face of imposter syndrome. That's tough! Today Brad and Lesley recap last episode's interview with fitness expert Jennifer van Barneveld-Pe and really dig into how to get through that imposter syndrome, asking for help when you need it and the power of DMs.

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] .

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• OnlinePilatesClasses.com is having a sale... (for a limited time!)
• Don't let access to a studio/gym stop you from doing Pilates
• The power of DMs
• Asking for help when you need it
• Correct and continue
• Accept that you're going to have imposter syndrome and do it anyway

Episode References/Links:

• Leave us a review on iTunes
• Jenny's The Find Your STRONG podcast
• Jenny's IG

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.

Resources

• Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!
• Lesley Logan website
• Be It Till You See It Podcast
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube
• Profitable Pilates

Social Media

• Instagram
• Facebook
• Tik Tok
• LinkedIn

Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan  

Hey, Be It pod listener, I just want to say thank you. Thank you for being you. Thanks for watching our podcast here on our YouTube channel. I'm just so grateful for you. I have a big favor, and I'm, I mean, like, let me just say, "It's not easy for me to ask for help," but I need your help. I'm on a mission, I really want to change as many lives and help people be it till they see it all over the world, and I need your help. We have been so grateful. The amount of downloads our podcast has had in just a short period of time is, it's amazing. That's insane. However, we also need more written reviews. So, and specifically on Apple. So even if you are watching here on YouTube, or you listen on Spotify, or you listen on Google Play, Apple podcast is where everyone looks to see which podcasts they should send people on for interviews. And, so we need lots of reviews to be there like a hundred written reviews. So, big huge favor if you could use the link below, go write a review, rate us, give us all the stars you love and let me know. Screenshot it, send it to me on a @be_it_pod. I just want to thank you for the bottom of my heart. We are truly, truly can't do this podcast without you. And, I'm just so grateful that these words hit your ears. And if you wouldn't mind writing us that review that would be amazing. And, I will be so forever grateful. Thank you and now here's the podcast you wanted to listen to.

Lesley Logan  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Lesley Logan  

Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co host in life, Brad and I are going to dig into the impressive conversation we had with, well, I had with Jennifer van Barneveld-Pe in our last episode. So you can go back and listen to that one. And then listen to this one. Or you can listen to this one and then that one or maybe you already listened to that one, (Brad: Maybe) cuz some of you are like on it like I am... Monday, we listen! So, you can feel free to pause this, listen to it or be awesome and keep going. (Brad laughs) Here's the deal, y'all, first time in a long time, we are having a sale at OnlinePilatesClasses.com/sale. This is you know, we've never do this. Usually, it's only for the challengers, but you can get in on one of our amazing annual memberships. It's based on the equipment that you've access to. And it's for like a few days only. So, if you are behind on your podcast, it's over. (Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, normally, we don't offer this outside of the people who are doing the challenge, which we've you've heard us talk about. So this is the first time that we've opened it up to the public, in addition to the challengers, so to find more information, you can go to OnlinePilatesClasses.com/sale.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah. Join OPC. Yeah, you know me. (Brad: Woah) Alright. Well, do we have a question from the listeners, my love?

Brad Crowell  

We do this is great. I love it when when you know, we love connecting with you through Instagram. So, thanks for sending this in. "I've never done Pilates, can I get started on my own? Or do I need to go to a studio?" Well, let me tell you, no, just kidding. You can field this one, love. (Lesley: Okay) (Brad and Lesley laughs)

Lesley Logan  

Honestly, like, you know, sure, I think a studio is great if you have access to one. I mean, there's there's awesome opportunities to be had when you're in person, but you can totally get started on your own like that is even what Joseph Pilates wanted, he put his exercises in a book and hoped people would do them. And little plug here, at OPC we actually have an intro series that (Brad: Yeah) I created specifically so that people could get started on their own. And so many people have their 10 minute to 15 minute classes and they're designed to prepare you to join all-levels class, whether that is an OPC class, or class at your gym or, or a studio. So the the reality is, is that not every exercise is for every body. Sometimes now, sometimes later or sometimes ever. And so the beautiful thing about Pilates is that every exercise is very compounding on to the next one. So when you learn the foundational exercises, you can pretty much just put them together and it becomes a more intermediate or advanced exercise. So yes, you can absolutely get started on your own. And, I hope you do with us because that'd be a lot of fun. But if not and you have a studio close by, go do it up. You know like that's also nice. We have a lot of people who do both, they do OPC and they do a studio. So ...

Brad Crowell  

If you, if you don't have access to a studio, and you're still interested, we have been filming exercise tutorials for years, years on the website. (Lesley: Brad made me do it) (Lesley laughs) So, we have hundreds of them. Gaia agrees... we have hundreds of them. And you can go on... they're free. So just go to OnlinePilatesClasses.com up in the menu, you'll see free tutorials. And you know, you can (Lesley: Choose the mat.) Yeah. Also, if you do that intro to Pilates series that Lesley was talking about, there's a quick guide on the left side that has a link to the free tutorial to explain each of the exercises that she's taking you through during the three videos that you'd get with the intro series. So anyway, feel free to check that out. If you have any questions. Just just you know, chat to us.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah. And I love that you asked this question. It's, you know, it might seem like something that people should just know on their own, but I didn't know this until I started doing Pilates and, and you know, Pilates is the best thing you can add to anything you're already doing. And so, I hope that you get started with us or we get started on your own and don't let having, not having access to equipment get to stop you from getting Pilates in your body.

Brad Crowell  

Okay, now let's talk about Jennifer van Barneveld-Pe. I ... that's a that's a name right there. I'm just sayin'. She because of that, she goes by JVB. She also goes by Jenny. (Lesley: Yeah) So, Jennifer van Barneveld-Pe is an inspiring body transformation specialist entrepreneur, fitness cover model, wife and mom of two after starting her fitness journey as a trainer at the age of 18. And eventually fainting on the gym floor from unhealthy eating and unhealthy exercising, she went back to school to study holistic nutrition. She is now the founder of an incredible community of strong women. Is also the President of Strong Fit Magazine. I think that's a recent thing for her within the past year or something. And, she's doing everything she can to support women live their best, helping them to live their best lives.

Lesley Logan  

So cool. She's so, she's so freakin' kind. And, I just ...

Brad Crowell  

It was pretty awesome that she was willing to be a guest. (Lesley: Oh, I mean ...) Especially because I don't know that we'd launched the pod yet, (Lesley: No.) when that (Lesley: No.) interview happened?

Lesley Logan  

We ha... this interview y'all happened so long ago, the podcast wasn't launched. And, here I am and me the President of Strong Fitness Magazine to interview with me. I'm like, I don't know when this is actually going to go up because Apple hasn't approved my podcast yet but ...

Brad Crowell  

Oh, that's right. (Lesley: Yeah) We were supposed to be live. (Lesley: Yeah) But then Apple held us up for ... (Lesley: Over a month.) Yeah, (Lesley: Yeah) like six weeks, I think.

Lesley Logan  

It was insane. And she was still like, "Of course, no problem." And she's like, "You should be on my podcast." And I was like, "Okay, great." (Brad laughs) And now y'all like she consider her absolute friend. And (Brad: Yeah) she wants to come visit us in Vegas. And you know, (Brad: Really fun) it's really cool. (Brad: Yeah) Never underestimate the power of like reaching out. You know what I tell y'all to screenshot our podcast and put a takeaway. So that's actually how Jenny and I started talking. I screenshotted, screenshot, (Brad: Took a screenshot) I took a screenshot of a (Lesley laughs) that also sounds redundant. Anyways, at some point, I did a screenshot on my phone. And I tagged her and Amy Ledin, who was one of our guests because she was on Amy's podcast. This girl is awesome. And in that podcast, she's like, "Yeah, I'm launching a podcast." And I was like, "That's amazing." So, I promoted Amy's pod with her. And then I said, "I can't wait to hear about your podcast. I know how tough it is to launch, we're in the middle of launching our own. So, you know, just let me know when you launch. I'm happy to promote it." And she's like, "That's amazing." We saw this whole conversation back and forth. Then when her podcast launched, I promoted it. She was so grateful. And then she's like, "I need to have you on my podcast." And I was like, (Brad: Cool.) "I want to have you on mine." So, (Brad: Cool.) let me just say the power of DMs, it happens when you tag someone you are literally have access to them. And most people do not give up the power of their DMs to an assistant or to anybody else. So you could be you could literally be talking to the person who you are inspired by or have taken advice from and then you can talk to them and who knows they become a friend.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah. That's amazing. (Lesley: Yeah) Well, so she was telling us her, I mean actually, it was a really great convo, you you covered a lot of ground. (Lesley: I know) Everything from her story of how she got into starting her community to then accepting the role as the President of Strong Fit and why she did that. And yeah, anyway, it was just a lot.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, well, I really loved when she talked about asking for help when you need it because this has been this is something that's really hard for me to do. And, it's always a good reminder. I've gotten so much better because as our companies grow, and as our dogs grow like this, you just need more help than you can't, you can't, you can't get away from asking for it. And when it's so amazing when you ask for help, the people that stepped forward to do it, it just real... makes you realize, like, look at all the work that I've put out there that people want to be supportive and held back. So, I just think that's a great reminder for us all. It's like, "If you need help ask for it."

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, she was talking about, specifically with her family. You asked her, "How, how can you possibly run a company, be the President of a magazine and have two kids?" (Lesley: Yeah) You know, and she said, "Well, I have help." I, she said it was really, she felt very guilty at first for hiring a nanny. And she said, but it took a little bit of time. But she's shifted her view to be grateful for the influence that this nanny is able to have in her kids lives, that it's a second influence in her kids lives. So helping them become more than just, you know, what she and her husband are sowing into them. But also now there's, there's another perspective. And, I thought that was really an amazing way to look at it. Also, the the she said that the mom guilt never goes away. But because the you know, they're able to be close to the grandparents, and you know, have a team around them asking for help has been easier to do. (Lesley: I love that.) Yeah.

Lesley Logan  

I think it's great. I think you know, also some of those people that you ask for help, because you're hiring them, you are changing their lives and the people around them, because this nanny is (Brad: Yeah) doing something that she really wants to do. She's able to pass along great and like advice and support these two kids. And then she goes home to her family. (Brad: Sure) And to people that are in her life. And, so I think we, I think we forget that when you hire people to help you with something you're passionate about, that it allows them to do something that they love and get paid for it, and then spread that to the people around them. So you know, (Brad: Yeah) ask for help when you need it. That's what I loved. What did you love?

Brad Crowell  

Well, she said, she, she said, "Being a mom is, it forces you to be more organized," and she was missing her workouts. And she said as her kids are getting older they are sleeping till seven. And so she decided to set aside time for herself in the mornings and get her workout in early. And it made me realize that we're we're on the right path, right? If she can be running a team, running a company, being a mom, you know, and still making time for herself. You know, she did talk about self care. She did talk about, you know how amazing she feels to tackle the rest of the day after she's gotten her workout in. And I love that, that we've been focused on that with the challenge. (Lesley: Yeah) The "Me, Myself and I" theme for this recent challenge. You know, because it's it's a, it's it's a great indicator, you know ...

Lesley Logan  

Yeah. I always love when I hear people promoting the same things that we are talking about, because it's a little confirmation that I'm not just making up something that (Brad: Yeah) I think it's important. And also like, I think it's really easy for people to hear me say that and go, "Yeah, Lesley must be easy for you. You don't have kids." But when you hear another mom say it (Brad: Yeah) a woman who is running a company say it. It's like, "Yeah, and she does it too." And it's because it's that important. It's so important to have that precious time and, and you know, maybe you don't even work out, maybe to sit in the sunshine, or sit in the darkness. I don't know what time you're getting up. And like, be still and just have quiet time. Like whatever time aside looks like for you is you get to decide that but it is so important that we do that. And, I'm glad she brought that up too.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, and for some, you know, honestly, it might simply be clocking out because working from home, it's so easy to work late. (Lesley: Yeah. Keep working) You know, and and maybe maybe it's you know, "Okay, it's dinner time, I'm finished now. I'm done working." And that could be the first place to start. But all right, finally, let's talk about those BE IT action items that you covered with Coach JVB, with Jenny. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items, can we take away from your convo with her? The thing that I really that was like, "Okay, cool that that makes a lot of sense." Was the very end she said, "Correct and continue," I'm pretty sure it was like (Lesley: Yeah) the very last thing she was (Lesley: Yeah) talking about. Correct and continue. And, I thought that was so great because you know, we talked about before taking baby steps, small steps, stepping stones, whatever, that whole idea, you know of moving the needle forward. And, it's also the the idea of very back in the very beginning when we were talking about the staircase, (Lesley: Yeah) you know, you don't, you know, like the direction with ro... Yeah, Rob Mack, you know the that there's the staircase there, you know the way you're going, but you might not know exactly every single step. And I love this addition to it, correct to continue, take a step forward, if that's still the right step, great. If not correct, then take another step forward, if not correct, then take another step forward. So that that I thought was awesome. It's really amazing to conceptualize that.

Lesley Logan  

Well, it takes the perfectionist out of it, and like, just to bring it back to Pilates, because that's what I love. When you're doing Pilates exercise, if it's, you know, like, I was just teaching Brad this morning, (Brad: Woah) actually. And, I gave him a correction, and he continues to move. And so it's not like we stop, we gotta have a moment about it, we got to do a lecture about it. We got to like, beat ourselves up about it. It's like no ... (Brad: It's a family meeting) just needs to press into his feet more and keep going. Right? So, I think it's one of the things that I truly love about how our Pilates practice can really help us train us for life is that as you're doing the movement, if you're like, "Oh, I'm not feeling this in the right spot," you just go ask yourself, "Okay, oh, that I need to pull my ribs a little bit more, or I need to pull my shoulder and my back" and you just keep continuing on. Cause the body will teach itself. And as you are doing things in your life, and you make these corrections, you continue. What's cool is your body and your brain remember that and they go, "Oh, the last time we went through that (Brad: Right) this happened." (Brad: Yeah) And so you, you aren't having to revisit that lesson all unless you want to, over and over again. So yeah, (Brad: Dating the same person. What?) Yeah (Lesley laughs) We stopped doing that ...

Brad Crowell  

Correct and continue. (Brad laughs)

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, okay. Well, my biggest takeaway is, accept that you're going to have imposter syndrome and still do it anyway. And I this is, this is actually something really, I think is important because I'm hearing a lot of people call it an imposter syndrome is the reason why they're not doing something. And 

 Brené Brown even had a talk about it on one of her podcasts recently. I'm not actually sure if it was she was on someone else's, or it was hers. But there's so much blaming the imposter syndrome. And that's like the excuse to not do something and I'm not saying the imposter syndrome doesn't exist, it 100% does. But using it as a reason to not do something is actually a problem. That's, that's actually not cool. Imposter syndrome is going to be there because in theory, if you're trying something new, you are in fact, an imposter, period. So you have to just go "Okay, I feel like an imposter because I'm new at this and I'm gonna do it anyway." So that's really what courage is. And so, you know, I just I love that she brought that up as a as a BE IT action item. (Brad: Yeah.) So, because it's like ...

Brad Crowell  

She was talking about her podcast and starting the pod. (Lesley: Yeah.) And (Lesley: Oh, my God,) and she's like, "Well, it's something I was wanting to do." But she thought, you know, "Who am I to be" You know, (Lesley: Same) (Lesley laughs) on a pod. You know, like hosting it and so, yeah, I you know, but the key was still doing it anyway.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, because same I even told her how hard it is when I was on her podcast, I said, I'm just like, "What am I doing? Like, why would anyone listen? What if I waste people's time?" (Brad: Sure.) But we did it anyways. And the reality is, as soon as it went up, that imposter syndrome goes like went away because now I am Podcaster. We're on episode 42, episode 43, 44 actually, I'm looking at the notes. I can count. So anyways, um, yeah, when you're feeling imposter sydrome, so just feel and go, "Oh. That's imposter syndrome right now." And then go anyways, "I'm going to do it anyways." (Brad: Yeah) Because you I promise you, you want to do it when like, you are new at something and don't have a ton. You'd like it's not like you want to be like, "Okay, I want to wait to have a million followers. And then I'm gonna be good enough to do X, Y, and Z." Yeah. Now you're gonna launch for the first time for a million people. I'd rather do five, I'd rather do it in front of five people. (Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell  

Yeah. (Lesley: So) That's true. (Lesley: Anyways) Amazing!

Lesley Logan  

Well, this is awesome. I'm Lesley Logan.

Brad Crowell  

And, I'm Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan  

Thank you so much for joining us today. We're so grateful you're here. I hope you enjoyed listening to Jenny's interview. And we'd love to know how you use her tips, these tips and your life. So, take a screenshot, tag Jenny, tag she's @coach_jvb, tag @be_it_pod and let us know your your takeaways. And that way we can see them and be inspired. I know it'll be a gift to her. And then if you have questions you can DM to @be_it_pod, we'll answer them on the next episode. Until then, Be It Till You See It.

Brad Crowell  

Bye for now.

Lesley Logan  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And, follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!

Lesley Logan  

'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.

Brad Crowell  

It's written, produced, filmed and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan  

Kevin and Bel at Disenyo handle all of our audio editing and some social media content.

Brad Crowell  

Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan  

Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all the video each week so you can.

Brad Crowell  

And the Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

Jennifer Van Barneveld-Pe (aka Coach JVB, aka Jenny) and Lesley Logan talk magazines, motherhood, and managing your time in a way to be both an entrepreneur and a family woman. They cover everything from fainting on the gym floor to asking for help when you need it. Are you a morning person? You might be after this episode!

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] .

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• Having an obsession with magazines as a teenager
• Jenny's excitement to step into the role of President of STRONG Fit Magazine
• Fainting on the gym floor
• Body image, dysmorphia
• Asking for help when you need it
• Are you a morning person?
• Setting aside time for yourself
• Accept that you are going to have imposter syndrome, and still doing "it" anyway
• Have a plan and take small steps along that plan
• Amy Ledin's daily agreement cards
• Organizing your time
• Correct and continue

Episode References/Links:

• Strong Fitness Magazine
• Jenny's website
• Jenny's IG
• Jenny's podcast
• Team Strong Girls website
• Team Strong Girls IG

Guest Bio:

Jennifer Van Barneveld-Pe (aka Coach JVB) but please call her “Jenny”, is a renowned body transformation specialist, President of STRONG Fitness Magazine and 3X fitness cover model. While she’s made a definitive mark on the fitness industry, she entered it with humble beginnings and her fair share of struggle – battling an eating disorder, almost filing for bankruptcy and multiple miscarriages. To rise to where she is now and the quest to heal herself led her to forming Team Strong Girls, a community of women helping women ascend their lives to new heights. She truly believes that fitness is a vessel to help women feel strong, confident and empowered in their bodies and their lives. With her eye on supporting women's journeys to live their best lives, she has now stepped into the shoes of President of STRONG Fitness Magazine further expanding her global impact to help more women find their STRONG. Jenny has also launched a podcast – Find Your STRONG, diving deep into personal stories of how health and fitness intersects people’s lives at key turning points, helping them find strength and purpose. Jenny and her husband have been happily married for 8 years and have 2 beautiful boys, Jackson and Logan and a long-haired chihuahua named Samuel.

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.

Resources

• Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!
• Lesley Logan website
• Be It Till You See It Podcast
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube
• Profitable Pilates

Social Media

• Instagram
• Facebook
• Tik Tok
• LinkedIn

Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan  

Hello you. How are you? Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It podcast. Today's guest is Jennifer van Barneveld-Pe, coach JVB, I call her Jenny, you can call her Jenny. She is beautiful inside and out. And we, you know, I met her through Amy Ledin, I mean through a mutual friend. She'd been talking about her for a while. And so, I followed her on Instagram, and I was like liking her posts, and I was commenting on them. And then I heard her on Amy's podcast that she launched her podcast, Find Your Strong, and I like binged out on her podcast. It's really awesome. I got to be on it. I'm episode number 26. So listen to this one, and then go binge on all of hers. I promise you'll you'll love it. She and I align in so many ways and the way we see ... the way we like view what action means. And also, she has I can't ... you have to listen to the end because I really love her message on how to like, assess what's going on and then re redefine what you're doing. So, I want you to hear her words on that because it's really great. Anyways, y'all she is the President of Strong Fitness Magazine. She's also the founder of Strong, Team Strong Girls. I love, you're going to hear her story in her journey, how she started as a trainer 18 and how she's gotten to where she is. But, what I also think you're going to hear that I really love is that like wasn't planned that like, "Oh, I'm going to be and I'll do this and I'll be the President of Strong Fitness Magazine." Like that's not how it went. And I think it's really easy for us to think it has to be this linear line. And just not, that's just not how it is. She's also for my mama's out there. She's got two boys and they've been in lockdown for a long time in Toronto, so I think you are going to love her advice for all of you. I know that I'm going to be quoting it for all of my mamas that come to me at OPC. So check it out. Check her out all of her information and links are in the show notes. I definitely want you to also check out Strong Fitness Magazine. And let us know how you, what your takeaways are when you listen to this, I can't wait to hear them. So post them on Instagram and tag me and her so we can hear what you took away from this episode. We're going to get into the interview right after this message.

Lesley Logan  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Lesley Logan  

Alright. I'm so excited you're here to listen to today's interview. Jennifer van Barneveld-Pe is someone I met through a mutual friend. She's been a guest on the show Amy Ledin and um Amy talked about you. First of all, like, like you were just a goddess and amazing human friend and, and just wonderful woman and I couldn't wait to get to know you. And I heard you on her podcast and I heard you had a podcast and I started stalking you were just a little bit. (Lesley laughs) (Jennifer: That's okay!) (Jennifer laughs) And and what is so true is you are so amazing and so supportive of women and your drive to help women find their strong is so, so cool. And I think we're aligned in a lot of ways, which is why I had to have you on the Be It Till You See It podcast. So, Jenny will you please tell everyone who you are and why you rock? (Lesley laughs)

Jennifer van Barneveld  

Yeah, thank you so much for having me today, Lesley. I, it was such a pleasure chatting with you a few weeks ago on my podcast. You know, I've been helping women live more confidently in their bodies for over 15 years now. I own a company called Team Strong Girls. And, I also own Strong Fitness Magazine, which I recently just stepped in the role of President of Strong Fitness Magazine so that's a fairly new thing. And I've also recently made the shift in helping entrepreneurs solely like you know, with their own body transformations and, you know, getting fit, gaining strength and confidence and feeling empowered in their bodies. So they can, you know, be the best in their busy lives. I think as we grow through our own life and our own business, we start to attract different people. So, I've recently made the shift in helping entrepreneurs solely and it's been awesome. And we always celebrate with like a celebration photoshoot at the end of their transformation, whether it's for themselves or for their brand because I feel like women just don't celebrate themselves enough. So, I've always been doing the photo shoot thing. And now it's been, you know, concentrating on those entrepreneurs, and it's just been amazing.

Lesley Logan  

Oh, my goodness that is beyond. So first of all, there's a lot that we want, I want to talk about with you because the fact that you are the president of a magazine, like, I remember growing up, and like I bought all ... I mean, I had subscriptions to every magazine, like there's, (Jennifer: Same) (Jennifer laughs) I had all of them and I, I would pull out all the workouts, and in 17 ... I pull out all, I have binder, and then I ... (Lesley and Jennifer laughs) and I, and I just can't imagine like, I feel like my teenage self would be like, what have I felt like, I would have been like, I want to, like, be in this magazine, I would want to like do a thing. And so did you always want, did you did you know you were gonna be a president of a magazine? Like, how did this come about?

Jennifer van Barneveld  

Oh, my God, it's hilarious because I was the same way. I loved magazines, I would have subscriptions to all these magazines and do the workouts and, you know, you know, follow the recipes and the diet trends, whatever it was. But, yeah, I feel like magazines were such a big part of the fitness industry for a really long time. And I've been a part of the fitness industry since I was like 18, you know, as a personal trainer, and then I worked for a supplement company and it was such a big part of it. You know, like, when I worked at the supplement company, we advertised in all the fitness magazines, too. So I never thought I would be a president of a fitness magazine. But it does make sense when I look back on my journey now. My husband too, he he's such a big magazine fan. Like I know, if you know we go into a Shoppers Drug Mart, Shoppers Drug Mart and here here in Canada or like an Indigo, and we split up, I know where to find him. He's always in the magazinee section. (Lesley and Jennifer laughs)

Lesley Logan  

That's amazing. (Jennifer: Always) That's amazing. (Jennifer: Yeah)

Jennifer van Barneveld  

So, I feel like he sort of put it out there and I sort of put it out there not really realizing it. And then when this opportunity came, it was just such a perfect fit, because we've been running Strong Girls since 2012. And I've always helped my clients like get exposure like that in different fitness magazines. And I'm like, "Wow," like I love telling stories. I love telling transformation stories. I love telling stories of women finding their strong and then this is just such a perfect synergy that I can be able and platform, I can be able to do that even more. (Lesley: Yeah) So it was it was just a dream come true and just perfect timing. (Jennifer laughs) with everything to be honest.

Lesley Logan  

Um, you you've talked about the transformation stories a couple of times and I, I loved, I love that you have a photoshoot. I, so at OPC, I'm always about like, celebrating your wins, and like noticing what you can do, what is possible for you. And I find it's taken, it's taken a while. But now, the people been with OPC for a long time, they're always like, every week, here's an aha moment, here's like they're celebrating, right? That allows new people to come in. And right from the get go, they're like, "Oh, look what I was able to do," and it's really fun. But I find that without that push, without that outside, push a lot of women specifically don't celebrate, don't do this, like fabulous photoshoot. And so what made you start, when did you start doing the photoshoots and like, how, how is that transformed?

Jennifer van Barneveld  

We started it like fairly like, right when I started coaching women. My husband and I, again came from that supplement world. So we were always used to, you know, we worked for some of the diet diet campaigns, which is a whole other story. But we would have to find those transformation. So we would find those transformations. We'dd diet them down in 12 weeks. This is another reason why I started Strong Girls because I didn't want to do that anymore. I thought it was way too restrictive and I hate timeframes like that. But that's again, another story. (Lesley: Yeah) But we always did that whole before and after. Right? And so when when I started coaching women, my husband's like, "You know what, I have an old camera, how about we just celebrate at the end of the transformation and I'll take some photos." And so he wasn't a photographer or anything. (Lesley laughs) He just did it. And we just saw them light up, like it was they loved it. And they were like, "Oh my God, like I can't even believe it. I worked so hard but I didn't think I looked at this great." And just with all that feedback, I'm like, "No, this needs to be part of it." So then we started working really more closely with the top photographers in Toronto and just worked it in as a part of the journey. Now not everybody has to do a photoshoot. But when you become a Strong Girls and you're like inside of inside our community, you start seeing the other girls do it. And even if you never thought that you would do something like that, it's like when you see somebody else do and they were a mom of three. And, you know, you saw them begin and now and now in front of a camera like that, it's it's almost like, "I wanna do that too," you know, they want they want to be part of that. So, it was from the beginning, but it really has evolved and now you know, helping my clients actually show up in the magazine is just a whole other (Jennifer laughs) level ...

Lesley Logan  

That is, that is so cool. I, I because I do a lot of photoshoots for for work, you know, for my business. And, I have been on days where I like literally text photographer, I'm like, "I really I'm just having a day. Just tell me what you need me to bring." And then all of a sudden your makeup gets done, you know that you've got that powerful outfit on. And there's (Jennifer: Yeah) a picture and you just start like you, you can't help it step into what I like to think of it like being in the higher self that you'd like always want to be daily. And so when I heard you did, I think this is, people should do this all the time. Because like, it's so much easier to see yourself as the person you want to be or to maintain the transformation that you've had, when you have this like celebration moment when you acknowledge the goal that's achieved. And then you get to show like, you get to have these pictures of like, "Look what I did and look who, like, look who I can be and who I am." Yeah,

Jennifer van Barneveld  

Absolutely. And like I said, I work with a lot of, you know, business owners and moms who, who on a regular basis, hide from the camera, (Lesley: Right) with their kids, you're hiding. And then for them to like really step out of our comfort zone and do this, it is such a game changer. It is life changing.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, that is that is really cool. So, um, you know, you've talked about, like, the jobs you've had in the past and ... and I and because I know you a little bit. So, I don't want to, I want to give away the story. But I feel like, you know, I look back at some of the jobs that I did. And I'm like, "Oh, that was an interesting. That's an interesting job." And I saw them all though, like, what I see when I've heard in you is like you did some things and you you had questions or like, "Ah, I don't really like how this is working out." And that led you to creating something else. So can you share a little bit about like, how you went from maybe doing 12 week transformations to Strong Girls?

Jennifer van Barneveld  

Yes, absolutely. So, I started as a trainer age 18. You know, when I was going to university, I was like, "Okay, you know what, I'll do this on the side." So I was training clients in the morning, you know, 6am to like 8am going to university during the day, and then coming back at night and training clients. And during that time, I was getting more involved in the fitness industry. I was I was I was testing some things out. So, I was cutting out carbs and trying all these dieting techniques and doing double day cardio is because a lot a lot of the people that I was working with at the gym, they were training for a fitness show. So, I started to get some of that advice and I started to try it on on myself. And I mean, it just sort of took over my life, to be honest, you know, I was drastically cutting calories. I was doing double day cardio and funny enough, I was getting noticed too for losing weight. So that was like that good feedback I was receiving and I'm like, "Oh, I must be looking great. I must be doing really well." And one day when I was training a client, I had actually fainted on the gym floor. You know, I was I was prepping for this photoshoot for a magazine at the time. And I was com... like I was probably eating like 800 calories, maybe even less. I was doing double day cardio. So, when I fainted, I was like, "Oh, my God, like this is not healthy." (Lesley: Yeah) And I knew I had to do something at that moment. I knew I had to change that was my wake up call because if I kept that up, you know, I wouldn't be here today, like I was going down a really, really dark hole. So that's really when I woke up and said, "There's got to be a better way," I decided to go to school for holistic nutrition and learn how to fuel my body properly, not be afraid of food, eat all the food groups not cutting out carbs. I started to train smarter and not harder, meaning I started to lift heavier and not you know, do those double day cardios that I used to do (Lesley: Right) and I began to really feel good, I began to feel strong, I began to have energy again, feel confident. And, I found this... I call my journey finding my strong because it's really what happened to me and you know I share with shaping my body with feeling so good. And I'm like, you know what, I want every single woman to find their strong, too. I don't want women to focus on weight loss anymore (Lesley: Yeah) and trying to be smaller all the time. Like, let's focus on gaining, gaining strength, gai... gaining confidence. And that's really when Team Strong Girls was born and because I just want every woman to feel how I did that time.

Lesley Logan  

Um, this story is so beautiful because I remember, I had stomach issues for 10 years. And, so I still have bouts with them but there was what people that know is that like, in the morning, I was like, "Oh, look at me like swimsuit model who wouldn't want do Pilates with me." And that night, I look nine months pregnant, because the bloating and like all the stuff and the doctors made it worse. And at one point, they're like, "I think your body dysmorphia," and I'm like, "I have pictures, like pictures of what I look like in the morning and night. This is not fake. I'm not it's not in my head," you know. (Jennifer: Yeah) But with all the different ways of trying to combat it and figure it out. I started I'm 5'9" and I got down to a 118 pounds, (Jennifer: Oh wow!) which is so skinny ... and I got more compliments then, then I get now you know, and (Jennifer: Yeah) now I think I look great. I have definitely, like, I'm definitely more than I've ever weighed. And that is and that's why I don't own a scale. But like, it's, it's because what I what I was going towards and like working in a gym environment and having those things. I was on this elimination diet for three months, all I ate was sweet potatoes like that's what I ate, because it couldn't figure out what was wrong with my stomach. And then but then I was losing the weight and people are complimenting you. (Jennifer: Yeah) And, I look back at those pictures and I'm like, "Who thought this was beautiful, (Jennifer: Yeah) I look tired. I look malnourished, I look exhausted." And and so when we figured out what's going on my stomach and I was starting to eat again, I had didn't have to be afraid of certain foods. I started to realize like, you know, there's there is that there has to be a better way. And it can't be about what's on the scale or what size you are. It has to be like, "Can I unpack an entire truck when my husband I moved to Las Vegas without a mover?" Yeah, I could. I could move things like, (Jennifer: Yeah) that's really awesome. We moved during a pandemic, we couldn't find movers. So, I had to, like, unpack (Jennifer: That's awesome!) (Jennifer laughs) the equipment, you know, so I think, I love your messages you have, you posted something on Instagram the other day about like, you know, don't miss out on 90% of life just a way 5% less or like loot like something like that. And it's like, I want that plastered on every girl's like door. (Jennifer: Yeah) Because I (Jennifer: Yeah) do think that so much of what holds us back from being what we want to be in this world (Jennifer: Yeah) and what we think we're supposed to look like.

Jennifer van Barneveld  

Mm hmm. I know I feel the same. And that whenever, whenever I go to post something or write something I always try to tap into who, who was like who did I need to hear from? I want to be that girl for myself when I was in my you know, late teens, early 20s. Because I mean, it's it's even more, so now with all the social media and you know, like, you're constantly getting, you know, bombarded with what you should look like, or, you know, images of thin girls or, you know, big boobs, big butt, like, whatever it is, you know, (Lesley: Yeah) you're you're constantly getting bombarded with that. And and it can be so disturbing. It can be so disturbing for your life, you know, (Lesley: Yeah) you can stop living your life if you're so consumed with with that and body image.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah. Well, thank you for what you're doing there because it is it inspires me every day. And I like I keep resharing, I'm like, "Everyone needs to hear this." Um, I want to talk about because you so you have you're married you, you have this ... you have Team Strong Girls, you also run a magazine and you have two boys. One whose name obviously is my favorite. So Logan and Jackson (Lesley and Jennifer laughs) So um, so, you know, I think a lot of women get stuck on not doing something for themselves, because they have families and a partner that they're also wanting to, like, take care of. How how has it been for you to like, go after your goals and also, like, try to keep a family together? Like what how do you do it.

Jennifer van Barneveld  

So, I have a really great support system. My husband is in the business with me and he fully understands and so like he, he knows that if I have to do something, he's got the kids. I've also had to learn that I'm always gonna have that mom guilt. I feel like mom guilt is just a normal thing to have. You just have to accept it. (Lesley: Yeah) And you know, do your best, show up the best you can but also be okay with asking for help when you need it. And so we have a nanny that comes in and helps us and she's like family now. And I had when I first hired a nanny when I had my first son, I had so much guilt about it. I was like, "I've got... but I have to be there for him. I have to be there." And now I've let that go because I now look at it as a blessing that he can have somebody else in his life to make an impact, to make him more of a well rounded person or them both, a more well rounded person. So having the grandparents there and having, you know, the caregiver there, and then also having our undivided attention at a certain time, you know, my cut off is always five o'clock and I'm with them a 110%. So, you know, I've just you, when you become a mom, you just have to be more organized in your schedule. Recently, I've, I've been getting up earlier, and just getting my workout in a lot earlier. And I've... I said recently, because it's been like four days, but it's a game changer. (Lesley and Jennifer laughs) Like six o'clock workout, do some work before the kids get up. And I mean, it's been such a game changer and I'm doing that for myself. You know, I have that me time, before, (Lesley: Yeah) before the day starts, (Lesley: Yeah) which is so key.

Lesley Logan  

Um, I have this whole thing like, give yourself a 100% first, because then you can give more to others, like it's the whole idea. Like, you have a glass of, you have a glass of water right now. Right? And like if you started your day with just what was in there, and like you walked around the house and was like, "Can I have some water?" You're like, you can have a sip, like, this is all I have, right? But if you filled it the whole (Jennifer: Yeah) if you filled it, all the way in the morning, then you're like, "Oh, you want some water, here some water here?" Oh, you know, (Jennifer: Yeah) like, "Oh, I spilled a little over here. It's... you have that it's fine." (Jennifer: Yeah) Like, you just, you can stay in that abundance mindset. So you said recently you get up earlier. So, I am a morning person that doesn't and I and people are often surprised. Like, I am actually not very happy in the morning. (Lesley and Jennifer laughs) But, I am a morning person meaning like when I (Jennifer: Yeah) wake up, there's this (Jennifer: Yeah) like moment of like, "Why am I up? What day is it? Maybe I should have slept in," even though I hate like I don't like waking up late later for me because I'm like the day just feels like it starts later. Right? (Jennifer: Yeah. Yeah.) So, so um, I have a sun, a sunrise simulating alarm clock that helps me wake up and I still am like, "Okay, it takes me less time to be a little less grumpy," but then I get moving, I run the dog and I start my workout and I have my coffee. I am a morning person use ... Are you a morning person? Like how easy it wasn't for you to like, get up earlier? People are like, "Well, so easy. If you're a morning person, it's just get up early." But, where you one?

Jennifer van Barneveld  

So, I wasn't one before kids. (Jennifer and Lesley laughs) And my kids were also like, especially my first was always an early riser. Like he was up at 5:30. And so, and he wasn't a great sleeper. So, I was always chronically tired for the first two years. And then I would you know, I would listen to these business coaches, mostly men saying that you should start your day at five. And I found that really sexist almost because, you know, like, just my life at that time. I was like, "There's... no way I can start my day at five when my little kid is like right there and like he needs me." Right. (Lesley: Right) So, it... yeah, you know, it really took some time. I mean, Logan and Jackson now are better sleepers. And so that's why I'm like, "Okay, I know that they're getting up around seven. So, I have one hour to (Lesley: Right) get my workout done." And that's really what pushes me and it's made me a morning person because I feel so much better after it's done. And I'm like, I don't have to worry about that for the rest of the day and I can actually get to work at 9am. Um so so kids has made me morning person plus the fact you're by yourself and you're never by yourself when you have kids. So you actually really do cherish that time in the morning.

Lesley Logan  

Thank you for sharing that because I think that that's been so helpful for so many people because it is easy. I don't have kids. So people like, "Lesley it's of course easy for you." It's like, "Well, just so you know, three dogs you should see them in the morning." (Lesley and Jennifer laughs) We got people (Jennifer: They need my attention, too) (Jennifer laughs) Yeah. They're like, dogs, one dogs asking for this treat, one wants to go out back, one what's more food ...

Jennifer van Barneveld  

I have them, I have a little dog now who's not as needy but my first dog was like a baby and he was like a baby like super needy. So I get it. (Lesley and Jennifer laughs)

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, August is always like at your feet. So you're like in the kitchen and you think he's like to the right of you and you turn and you just trip over him because now the left you because he just has to be touching you. And so, but for the most part, I can like shut them in a room. (Lesley laughs) (Jennifer: Yeah) You can't do that with children. So, um, so okay, um, you have you started your own podcast, recently. Y'all, I'm episode 26, I can remember (Jennifer: Yehey) because it's my birthday January 26. It's really easy. Um, what made you want to start a podcast?

Jennifer van Barneveld  

Oh my gosh, I wanted to start one for so long. But, I think just like anything, it's that imposter syndrome sets in (Lesley laughs) (Lesley: Daily?) Yeah. And I was like, "Oh my God, who am I to like actually start a podcast" and I'm I never thought of myself as a really clear, great speaker. I think that just comes over time, the more that you do, right. I feel like anything you start, it's normal to feel like an imposter. But I mean, I always wanted to do it. I I'm such a fan of podcasts, I listened to them all the time. So then when I stepped in the role of President of Strong Fitness Magazine, I thought, "Okay, here's my opportunity," because I can I can start interviewing co... the cover models, regular contributors, and, and I was like, "I'm gonna do it. I'm just going to do it. I'm going to do the whole launch." You know, how the launch is? (Jennifer laughs)

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, it's a it's a, it's a thing, y'all. (Lesley laughs)

Jennifer van Barneveld  

It's a lot. It's a lot guys. And I just did it. I was like, "You know what, I'm gonna do it." I did it and I absolutely love it. It's been in the top 10 space of fitness podcasts in Canada for like, the last 10 weeks. (Lesley: That's amazing) Yeah. I mean, it's, it's just given me a chance to connect with people like you, learn, talk, you know, (Lesley: Yeah) you know, just just talk and and I'm in Ontario right now, so we're still in lockdown. I told you this before the podcast, we're still in lockdown. And it's been, it's been crazy. So, it's just another fun, you know, outlet that I can get out and chat with people and learn and it's it's been incredible.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, I agree. I had been wanting to do this for a long time, but I didn't know what it was going to be. You know, like, I didn't know. Like, I'm like, "Well, what?" Does... not that it has to like, be perfect. But like, I just was like, "What's the point?" Why... (Jennifer: Yeah) because I don't like to waste people's time. Like, "What what do I want them to get out of it?" (Jennifer: Yeah) And I'm so um, so it took a bit and, and then I was able to convince my, my husband that we could do it. He's like, "I don't have time to add a podcast to the three businesses we're running." And I'm like, "But we need it," like, "We can we can do it. People want to hear from us." And, (Jennifer: Totally) so when I met, when Amy started her podcasts, and the people who were the company that like helped ... hers and put it out there, I think I don't know if they do yours, too ...

Jennifer van Barneveld  

Same. Same. And so Amy was such a huge, (Lesley: huge) and why I started because she was like, "Just do it." (Lesley: Yeah) Like, "Here, here's the blueprint."

Lesley Logan  

Here it is ... (Jennifer: Yeah) Yeah. And, so so we use Disenyo and they are amazing. Kevin and Bel are amazing. But it's really funny and Brad's like, "I'm so excited. You're doing this. I don't have to be part of it at all." (Jennifer: Yeah) He is, y'all every day like he's really listening to them, their show notes. He's producing the whole thing. He can't (Lesley laughs) (Jennifer: Oh, wow. That's awesome) he's part of it. But um, I, I hear you there is imposter syndrome like, "Who am I? Who wants to listen to me? What do I have to say? There are so many podcasts out there." But like you it's like, "There's, it's really fun for the conversations and the people I've (Jennifer: Yeah) gotten to meet (Jennifer: Yeah) and the people that I've been able to reach out to," because like when on earth, when ... (Lesley laughs) really go, "Okay, do you want to have an hour long conversation with me?" No, (Jennifer: Yeah) but if you have a podcast they do (Lesley laughs) (Jennifer: Sure. Of course) Right? (Jennifer: Yeah) So, um, so yeah, I love ... because I you'll have to listen to it. I listen to it a lot. First of all, I got my four liters of water a day from you, (Jennifer laughs) changed my life. I was only doing two and a half. I was only doing two and a half and I was like, "Gosh, I just always feel like dehydrated. I'm doing so much water" and you're like, three to four liters, and I was like, really? (Jennifer : Yeah) Game changer, y'all. (Lesley laughs)

Jennifer van Barneveld  

Yeah. It is a game changer. It's total game changer. Yeah, that's why I have this big jug right here. I'm like, super do thrrough... you probably see me take like 10 sips ... (Jennifer laughs)

Lesley Logan  

Yeah. No, it's, it's, um, it's a game changer. Brad and I like compete like who's got to the four liters before. (Jennifer laughs) (Jennifer: That's awesome) He he's so so we have you know, it's we live in in Las Vegas. So, it's just super dry and when it's that point of the year when we walk at night, it's 90 degrees or hotter. So at 9pm so we have a backpack, a water pack that we walk (Lesley laughs) or drinking water the whole time ...

Jennifer van Barneveld  

I'm buying one of those. (Lesley: Yeah) I'm totally buying one of those. You just reminded me, you're like the third person that told me so it's like I need to I need to remember this. I'm gonna buy it right after this podcast. (Jennifer laughs)

Lesley Logan  

Oh, get it. It's it's awesome. We take it on all the dog walks and we have a little bowlllllll so we can like fill up their water for them too. But last night ... I was like, "What are you doing?" He was filling out the water pack. He's like, "This is easier." And he put it on his back to go sit at the computer and he could drink his water (Lesley laughs) while working.

Jennifer van Barneveld  

Oh my God. That would be a dream come true for me ...

Lesley Logan  

You are the reason why that we drink four liters of water a day. (Jennifer: Yehey) (Lesley laughs) (Jennifer: Yay!) Okay, Jenny, where can people follow you, find you ... if they want to be on Team Strong Girls like how can they do all of that?

Jennifer van Barneveld  

Okay, so I have my own website called coachjvb.com. And, I also have my Team Strong Girls website teamstronggirls.com. Same with Instagram @coach_jvb or @teamstronggirls and then you can also find me through Strong Fitness Magazine, if you want to subscribe. I have a Strong Girl discount, which all include, I'll include that link for you. So you can, you know ...

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, we'll put it in the show notes (Jennifer: ... to your listeners.) That's amazing. You'll have to get one, I have one and I'm getting, I'm surprising my sister. Well, by this time that she hears it, she'll already have it. But for her for her birthday is like an ongoing gift. I'm just going to get (Jennifer: Okay) a subscription because she loves to work out. She's got... she like, you know, she's a bar instructor and a spin instructor like so I'm like, "She's need to have a magazine." So it's a ongoing birthday (Jennifer: Awesome) gift. (Jennifer: That's amazing.) Okay, so all those things will be in the show notes. Check her out, you know, I promise, her posts always inspire me. And, and you can also see that she's beautiful and sweet and loving, supportive and she's also a human being. And some days when I see your posts like, "This is this is what I'm posting for you today." And I'm like, "Yes, I need to know that too." (Lesley laughs) (Jennifer: Thank you, Lesley) Okay, so I'm a big fan of action steps, because I think it's really awesome to be inspired to hear people's stories and to go, "Oh, wow, they did that. I could do that, too." I hope we inspired some people to attempt to start a podcast today. And but but what are the first next steps? So what are your tips for being it?

Jennifer van Barneveld  

Yeah, so, I mean, I feel like we touched on this today and that is to accept that you are going to have imposter syndrome. Regardless, like everybody has that and it's part of it's part of growth, you know, when you have that imposter syndrome, it is that fear of failure or fear of what people are going to think of you. And that's a normal thing, when you want to do anything, that's a normal thing when you actually want to make a change. And it's accepting it and still doing it anyways. (Lesley: Yeah) You know, I also feel like having a plan is so key when you have a plan, and you have those small action steps towards a plan. And actually doing them you know, like, even if it's just like, one little thing every single day, action beats anxiety, you know, anxiety happens when we're not actually doing the thing that you know, is burning inside of us. (Lesley: Yeah) So those little action steps, like write it out, have a plan, write it out every single day, make the commitment to yourself. I got this from Amy Ledin, she has, you know, her her daily agreement card. (Lesley: Oh my God. That's the best) Yes. I mean, she's awesome. She's helped so many of my clients too. And it's just like, it's just at the end of the day writing out wha... how you want to show up for the next day, like how you want to be your best self for the next day, or what that one goal is and what what is that one action step you're going to take the next day to get you a little closer to that goal. And it's just about being more organized like for me this past few weeks, it was you know, you know this my kids are home now because a lockdown in Ontario, I feel like we're like the only, we're like the only country on this earth that's still in a lockdown by ...

Lesley Logan  

Oh, at the time of this recording. Melbourne, Australia went into lockdown two days ago. So you're not alone. (Jennifer: We are not alone) At the time in this recording. (Lesley laughs)

Jennifer van Barneveld  

You feel a little better. But it's like, you know, it's there's a lot on our plates as women, you know, especially if you're a mom, if you're a business owner. A lot is on us. Right? And so it's it's just really about being organized and asking yourself, "Can I, what can I do for myself today? What can I do to get me closer to that goal?" It's writing it down, and it's organizing your time. Like for me, it was waking up a little earlier and just getting that time in for myself so I can start my day on my action steps earlier and actually got them down.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah. That is really cool. I love that you even like the... the one thing I could be doing because what people I think we underestimate that. Like, if you just did one thing a day towards the thing that's 300... how many days in the year? 352 300... (Lesley laughs) Don't (Jennifer: 365) quote me on that how many days on the year (Jennifer laughs) 65 as a ... (Lesley and Jennifer laughs) You know, I'm on a different planet ... And there's 52 weeks, 365 days got it. So that's a lot of things. That's so many things. (Lesley laughs)

Jennifer van Barneveld  

Yeah, I feel like people just overwhelmed themselves like, "I got to do..." Or, you know, it's even like starting a ... if you're just looking at starting a fitness program. It's like you're you're not going to be perfect every single day. There's going to be little obstacles along the way. I'm just being okay with that. It's like with anything, you know, you're going to start a new business venture. It's not going to be roses, like we'll we know that, you know, (Jennifer and Lesley laughs) we know that there's going to be things and it's the best thing that you can actually save yourself is correct and continue, move on and don't dwell on what didn't happen, you know? Correct and continue, the more you correct and continue, the more you're going to get closer to where we want to be.

Lesley Logan  

Oh, that is a great phrase. I love that people can, we can just like ... correct and continue. (Jennifer: Yeah) I love that. I'm like, "I like reflect and refine" ... right, like (Jennifer: I love that.) Yeah, I we have we have some similar things. I feel like we're gonna have to team up on some other things because you (Jennifer: Yeah) say, "Action meets anxiety" and I'm like, "Oh, action is the antidote to fear." It's like ... (Lesley laughs)

Jennifer van Barneveld  

Yeah, we say it in different ways. (Lesley: Yeah) But it means the same thing.

Lesley Logan  

Means the same thing and it needs to be said over and over and I think I say it over and over just for myself. (Lesley laughs) Jenny, (Jennifer: Thank you) I love you. I love you, so I can't wait to the borders open up. Either you're gonna come to Vegas or I'm gonna get myself into Canada (Lesley laughs) Yeah. Well, all the shows are open now you... it's gonna maybe maybe give yourself some time in Toronto open up before you like come here, you'll be like a definitely a different world. (Jennifer: Yeah, exactly) Going from lockdown to Vegas.

Jennifer van Barneveld  

I'm counting down. I'm counting down the days.

Lesley Logan  

Um, but everyone thank you so much for listening. Please do us a favor screenshot this. Post it on Instagram tag the @be_it_pod and tag @coach_jvb, her her Instagram is on the show notes, if you need to see what it looks like and you let us know how you are Be It Till You See It. Until next time, Be It Till You See It my friends. Love you!

Lesley Logan  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And, follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day!

Lesley Logan  

'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.

Brad Crowell  

It's written, produced, filmed and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan  

Kevin and Bel at Disenyo handle all of our audio editing and some social media content.

Brad Crowell  

Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan  

Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all the video each week so you can.

Brad Crowell  

And the Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

Knowing yourself, being curious, asking genuine questions... these are just some of the topics that Lesley and Brad covered during today's episode while recapping Dr. Kelly Bender's interview from the last episode. Also discussed was mantras, physical reminders and more.

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] .

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• We're on week 3 of the OPC #100withme Challenge
• Cadillac flashcard deck will be available in the spring of 2022
• Putting physical reminders for yourself in your personal space
• Money is all around me
• Going to meet-ups that are not for your profession
• Be curious, ask questions
• Maybe there's a better way
• Knowing yourself helps you make clear decisions

Episode References/Links:

• Join the OPC #100withme Challenge waitlist
• Join the OPC Flashcard deck waitlist
• Send your questions into the @be_it_pod on IG

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.

Resources

• Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!
• Lesley Logan website
• Be It Till You See It Podcast
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube
• Profitable Pilates

Social Media

• Instagram
• Facebook
• Tik Tok
• LinkedIn

Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan  

Hey, Be It pod listener, I just want to say thank you. Thank you for being you. Thanks for watching our podcast here on our YouTube channel. I'm just so grateful for you. I have a big favor and I'm, I mean, like, let me just say, "It's not easy for me to ask for help," but I need your help. I'm on a mission, I really want to change as many lives and help people, be it till they see it all over the world, and I need your help. We have been so grateful. The amount of downloads our podcast has had in just a short period of time is, it's amazing. That's insane. However, we also need more written reviews. So, and specifically on Apple. So even if you are watching here on YouTube, or you listen on Spotify, or you listen on Google Play, Apple podcast is where everyone looks to see which podcasts they should send people on for interviews. And, so we need lots of reviews to be there like a hundred written reviews. So, big huge favor if you could use the link below, go write a review, rate us, give us all the stars you love and let me know. Screenshot it, send it to me on a @be_it_pod. I just want to thank you for the bottom of my heart. We are truly, truly can't do this podcast without you. And, I'm just so grateful that these words hit your ears. And if you wouldn't mind writing us that review that would be amazing. And, I would be so forever grateful. Thank you and now here's the podcast you want love to listen to.

Lesley Logan  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Lesley Logan  

Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co host in life, Brad and I are going to dig into the inspiring convo I had with Dr. Kelly Bender in our last episode. If you haven't yet listened to that interview, feel free to stop now. Go back to that one. Listen to it, you're gonna wanna listen to it, there's some good stuff in there. And then come back and listen to this or do it in the reverse order. However, you like to do things in your life. Maybe you're out washing the dishes (well, I don't know why you would be out washing dishes) maybe you're in washing the dishes, and you just have wet hands. You can't change the order of episodes. That's fine. It's gonna be awesome. No spoiler alerts. I'm really excited Babe though, because we are, we are finishing up week three of the #100withme challenge. And this one is like, it's so fun because the people who are on their third and fourth time around are like really getting like they're like, there's so much space and grace for themselves. And they have so much support for others and the people are on their first time are truly like owning it. They're like ... I mean, even when they get a little they've had a little head cold, whatever they're like, "I'm taking care of myself though. I'm laying in bed." (Brad: Nice) And like they're celebrating it. It's really fun.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, it's been good. I feel like the more we do this challenge the the people who have been with us the whole time. They definitely get it and it's been great for them to kind of share the methodology, the thought process with the new people as they're coming in and to be encouraging and stuff. (Lesley: Yeah) So, it's cool to to be building a community (Lesley: Yeah) and to see people you know, getting to know each other.

Lesley Logan  

I know. It's really a lot of fun that we have our hype girls in there this time and they're they're having a lot of fun and you've been you've been doing the check in calls before me. We have people (Brad: Yeah) y'all, you don't know what this challenge is called #100withme because it's about giving yourself 100% with me and ... (Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell  

This is the "Me, Myself and I" theme.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, I thought it was time because I just saw so many people getting back into their life after, you know, different lock downs and such and people were falling back into those bad. Oh, I mean, technically there's no such thing as a bad habit, but the life of going, being really busy doing things for others before they do things for themselves over scheduling themselves. (Brad: Sure) And so we just had to do ... I mean "Me, Myself and I" themed one, and it's go, I mean people are really "me, myself and I-ing." I love it. I love it.

Brad Crowell  

That's a that's a ...

Lesley Logan  

I made it. Is it a verb? Did I make it a verb?

Brad Crowell  

You made it a verb. You did. "Me, myself and I-ing" (Lesley: Yeah) Yeah (Lesley: Anyways ...) good for them.

Lesley Logan  

I know, good for them. (Brad laughs) Somehow, I make it about me, but I'm so proud of that. (Brad: I love it.) But actually we are going into week four this weekend. And this is where it's like you start to see the people cramming it in because they're trying to get there checkins but also you see people who are really getting into their flow. And I love that and that's why we do it for 30 days. Because, you know, the first week is super motivated, super exciting, it's new. And the second week is where like things life gets in the way and you start to... things happen. But then the third week we troubleshoot, and the four week, fourth week, you're like to hopefully in your groove, and if not, if you start in the week three, we had a few people start late, that's okay, because you have all the inspirations apart from the people who've gone through it with you. So you kind of you kind of learn it faster.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah. (Lesley: Yeah) And we've had some people who, you know, signed up, and then we're not able to really do it. And so they're just getting started. (Lesley: Yeah) Yeah, so it's good.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, so if you are like this challenge sounds really fun. I want to be all about myself. Then you want to go to #100withme.com and go on the waitlist for the next one. But also, if you become an OPC member, you hear about it first and we will always give our OPC members an option. And I would just say if you are on the email list, there's a fun little announcement that's gonna go out about becoming an OPC member next week. (Brad: Watch out now) ... Watch that email. Anyways, that is something that is super exciting going on right now as we speak in real time. But before we get into the recap, do we have an audience question?

Brad Crowell  

We did, as you definitely heard us talk about here on the pod. We've had two decks of flashcards come out for Pilates flashcards, one for the Mat and the other for the Reformer. And somebody asked if we were going to be doing another deck on the chairs. (Lesley: Yeah) And we are ...

Lesley Logan  

We are that's not the next one though. (Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell  

But that's not the next one. So, we're so grateful for your question. Stay tuned. Next will be the Cadillac ...

Lesley Logan  

It's the Cadillac and I'm really excited about it. It should be out in spring time, spring time.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, in the spring and then the chairs should be out in the fall of next year.

Lesley Logan  

That is the plan and now that my team is already doing all the legwork for it. I can't back out (Brad laughs) so you will see that there is, Brad isn't there a fancy little shindig where they can like just get all deck alerts when it comes to upcoming decks. I pretty sure there is a waitlist for this. He will put it in the show notes. He's he's may feel like it doesn't exist but it does.

Brad Crowell  

I will, I will put it in the show notes now there was a waitlist at one point for the Mat and then we rolled it into the Reformer. So ...

Lesley Logan  

And then we rolled it into it all deck waitlist.

Brad Crowell  

We did yeah so we have we I will put it in the show notes. If you're interested in getting updates about the flashcards.

Lesley Logan  

My brain is like, "Meridith did it." (Brad: Yeah. She did it.) I'm hoping he read that brain (Brad laughs) message. I just sent it right across the table. Anyways, thanks for that question. I I'm so glad you're so enthusiastic about these deck cards. They're super, super fun for us. And I'm going to be really honest, these next decks are a little bit more tricky to put together because there is no order. And (Brad: Yeah) there's a lot of variations for things. And so, I'm really trying to put together the most comprehensive version of the deck that we can so that everyone including teachers or non teachers can use it for their tower and their Cadillac, and then more. So stay tuned. Thank you ... You can send any questions you have for us. It could be about life, business, Pilates, you know, a book you want to read, that neighbor next door who's driving you nuts, you can whatever and you can send it in at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. We'll answer in the next episode.

Brad Crowell  

Awesome. Well let's talk about Dr. Kelly Bender from last well from the last episode on Monday. I know you're so excited to talk (Lesley: I love her) about her because I know that she's one of your besties. (Lesley: She is) Dr. Bender is a California licensed Naturopathic Medical Doctor. Trained in natural medicine, ketamine, regenerative medicine, bio identical hormone replacement therapy and peptide therapy. And I had no idea about most of that. I just was like, "Oh, our friend's a naturopathic doctor" ...

Lesley Logan  

And she's come to Cambodia with us. He has spent a week with her and a different country. No idea ...

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, but I didn't know about all these medical situations. So she's like, super focused on staying on the cutting edge of things. She's very plugged in. She helps you learn about your own body and how you can take care of yourself with a specifically individualized treatment plan. She's been both Lesley and my doctor for a while now plus a our friend for longer and I'm shocked to say like I said I didn't know most of her story. So it was super fun to listen to the two of you talking about that and I can absolutely envision her, knowing her, I can envision her you know, like talking herself into going to a meetup and then get put herself in the room and like intentionally, you know, like, she's great at talking to people. So, you know, once she got in the groove, I'm sure it was easy.

Lesley Logan  

She's also 100% great at listening to people because I spend time with her and I hang out with her and like we've been on the retreat with her. And it amazes me like she intently listens with a smile on her face. And her eyes are like locked in. And she's like listening. And it's really fun to be around. I've done some networking events with her, and, and I ... she's whatev... everything that she talked about doing inside the podcast she totally 100% owns and does like that was all real ...

Brad Crowell  

Well, there was a ton of takeaways and also a handful of BE IT action items at the end.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, so I real... there's so many things I loved. I was listening to it again this morning. And I was like, "Oh, I love that, Oh, I love that. What am I going to choose?" So actually, I really loved about the partnership about putting things in your physical environment that make you feel that happiness in a desired state. And I think this is really true. I'm not I'm not quite certain if anyone's talked about having like a token or a talisman, that might be an episode coming out, that I talked to someone about, but it's like having something in your room that when you see it, it kind of snaps you into that experience and that feeling you want to have. And so she does have what she talked about she has two $100 bills on a seashell with an amethyst stone where she sits down so that she knows, "Money is all around me. Money's every... is all around me." (Brad: Yeah.) And I was like, "I think, I can do that. I need to put money just everywhere." (Lesley laughs) Would have been really helpful this weekend, when I left for different state without any credit cards whatsoever, I would have been really helpful. (Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell  

I know, I know and I was like, "Here Babe, here's all the cash I have," I'm sure it was like $17 or something ... (Brad laughs)

Lesley Logan  

Thank you, you gave me that $17 because I was able to buy a cup of coffee. But I really did trust us like, "Money is all around, it's gonna be here." Anyways, I think that that's a really cool thing that people could do, it wasn't a BE IT action item. But like, if there is something that makes you smile, or if there is a scent that makes you feel a certain way, or like pick something, put it where you sit, put it where you are, so that you have this reminder of the desired state you want to be in.

Brad Crowell  

Especially, I think aroma therapy is so good at this, you know, it is like, you know, it can transport you to a different place with that. I think music can do this too. But to actually see something like a physical item that is there that can also be a really great trigger.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, I love that. What is something you loved that she said?

Brad Crowell  

You know, I I'm always into getting out meeting people, you know, my, my, one of my strengths is "WOO," right, "Winning Others Over." So, I love to be in a room and meeting everybody. And she said something that I thought was really, really strategic in building a network. You know, when she first moved to Los Angeles, she said she was a doctor, she moved there and she didn't really know that many people. And she wanted to start meeting people. So she started networking. And so she would going she would go to these meetups, but her her friends were going her medical doctor friends who are going to meetups, we're going to medical meetups, and she said, "I intentionally chose business meetups, because I (a) I knew that doctors weren't ever going to become my patients down the road. And (b) you know, I knew that if I was gonna run a business, I was going to need help doing it. And I didn't know anybody to help me with it at all. So, I thought well, I might as well go meet people who do business stuff." And so she was in the room intentionally trying to meet people who were not like her. And I thought that was just really (Lesley: Oh, yeah) smart. It was like, Oh, yeah, that's, that's kind of obvious when you say it like that. But that's a great thing to be self aware enough to do that.

Lesley Logan  

It's something that I you know, this is not a Pilates business podcast. But so that Pilates friends out there, the teachers, the teachers listening, this is something I see constantly, they spend a lot of time in Pilates teachers' forums, and then their (Brad: Sure) selling to other Pilates teachers. (Brad: Right) But those teachers are not going to be your clients. (Brad: Right) So, it's really okay to spend time in other groups (Brad: Yeah) because even if those people don't become your clients, they could be the people who are the keys to the clients, you're going to have ... (Brad: Yeah, they'll connect the dots for you) I just say that because it's so true. Like we really need to put ourselves in rooms with people who don't do what we do, because it actually allows us to grow the thing that we're going to do.

Brad Crowell  

100% and and, you know, now she said, from those meetups, which, what she says 2010 or so like (Lesley: Yeah) 10 years ago. (Lesley: Yeah) Right? She's not only working with some of the people that she met, but she has some of those people have become clients too. So you know, it was a definitely forward thinking long term concept. But, you know, set herself up. So, bravo for her. I thought that was amazing. And, we can all be doing that too, even if it's not, even if we don't have any underlying, you know, specific reasons do it, you know, going to hang out with other musicians is great. But going and hanging out with maybe comedians is could also ... (Lesley: Right, because you could ...) a different perspective.

Lesley Logan  

Well, 'cause some comedians are adding music. So they'd be like, (Brad: Sure) "Oh, man you write a song for this," like, it's just really cool to put yourself in other people's arenas and and you just learn a lot, you there's just a lot you and I also find that you can have a better outlook on the thing that it is that you're doing when you hang out other people because it's, it's easy when you're hanging out people who already do what you do, to go into, "This is going wrong and this is going wrong" because they understand they don't, you don't have to explain anything. But when you are in a different arena, and you are talking to someone who doesn't even know what it is that you do, of course, you want to talk about it in this like, "Awesome," like because you want to go, "My job sucks." (Lesley laughs) You like want to say like, "Oh, I really love about this, and I get to do this. And this is really exciting." And so it does help you meet more people. And so whether you go into other rooms, because you're looking for friends, or you're looking for networking, it is an awesome idea. I think it's really great. So go do it. (Brad: Yeah) Let us know how it goes.

Brad Crowell  

Well, let's talk about the BE IT action items. So what bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your convo with Dr. Kelly Bender? And I'll go first she, she said the she was talking about chatting with those other people. And she said, "Be curious," you know, that's the best way to connect with others is to be curious about them. And ask them questions, you know, genuinely ask them questions and learn about them and let them share with with you. And, I think that that's something that's applicable across the board. You know, ... when we have, I'm really guilty of this, I think I spend some time thinking about the thing, whatever the thing is, and I make a decision and I say, "This is the most efficient, this is the best way, this is the right way, this is the whatever you however you want to call it. This is how it should be done. Or this is how it is or this is you know, whatever." And then we we're like, "Great. I've ... made that decision moving on," then you don't think about it again. Right? And there's, you know, that maybe maybe you got it right. But maybe there's another way, maybe there's a better way who knows, right?

Lesley Logan  

Here what it's so freakin' funny. I just spent the weekend in Dallas, my friend Erika Quest, she was on the ... on the show earlier in the season. And she, whenever she talks about Brad, she's like, "Brad is literally the definition of curiosity." (Brad laughs) She's like, "Brad walked in to our backyard. And he is just like, curious about this plant and he's curious about this plant. And he researches this." And like, if you ask, like, "I wonder, how I can do this?" He's like, "You know, how we could do that?" And like you have you actually (Brad laughs) have a lot of curiosity. And she's like, "When is he going to tattoo?" Like curiosity on him because like that he is just like such that person. But I do think when it comes to like your own, like the way you do things in your house, or the way things you do in your business, it's easy to get set in your ways. (Brad: Yeah) But putting you you put yourself in situations that are unfamiliar, you are very curious. So, I think ...

Brad Crowell  

That's true. Yeah, I mean, especially when you're unfamiliar, you know, it kind of forces you to be curious to to survive. (Lesley: Yeah) So that's, that's if you're if you're trying to figure out how you can be more curious, go to a meetup or people you don't know. (Brad laughs)

Lesley Logan  

Yeah. But I really love... she was just like (Brad: Yeah), "Ask questions." And we talked about this in the podcast already. But just a reminder, in case you're only listen to recaps, if you go, "I'm an introvert, I'm shy," whatever. Being curious, you can be introverted and shy. (Brad: Yeah) You just have to go, "Oh, tell me more about that. Oh, what's that like? Oh, are you having fun with that? Oh, how long you've been doing that for?" Like, you can just like ...

Brad Crowell  

One of the things that I asked which is really kind of started off in a snarky way. And now has become something that I just asked because it's turned into a great question is, "Is that a good thing?" (Lesley: Oh) Right? Because people make a statement and, and then I can't decide .... Like at first I was like, you know, kind of razzing him because it clearly didn't sound like it was a good thing. But now it's like, you know, because because it it kind of is a question that puts people that makes them think through, "Is it a good thing?" You know, and then they actually have to pause think about it and then respond to that. So that's another easy way to ask ...

Lesley Logan  

We're gonna have to put like Brad's conversation starter questions into (Brad laughs) a lead magnet. (Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell  

Is that a good thing?

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, it is. I think everyone for holiday parties is gonna be like, "Ah, how do I get this conversation going?" (Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell  

That's pretty funny. I love that. Well, what about you, what what's your BE IT takeaway?

Lesley Logan  

I love to know yourself one. I think that this is a an obvious one and also like, "How and the heck do you do this?" And, I also think that you're if you're curious, you're going to constantly learning about yourself, you're gonna learn some things about yourself and you change a lot and different environments you kind of change where you maybe feel more comfortable where you don't. And so just knowing yourself and knowing like, "How many hours can I teach in front of people?" This is my question I asked myself going into this weekend before I'm like, "I need to be by myself" and I really was set up for success for this weekend. It was so fun, I only had a couple hours in a row and then I got a break and I was like, "Yep, that's where I'm at right now" and like just knowing that so then I got an email like, "Can you come teach us thing?" It's like four hours and a half and I was like, "Hmm, here's what I can do? I can totally do. Is there a way we can just split that up into two blocks?" Because I know myself and so I'm not saying yes to things that are going to possibly make stress me out or (Brad: Yeah) make me upset that I like change the boundary about myself. So the more you know about yourself the easier to say yes to things especially for those of you who are wanting to start some sort of side hustle like if you know you are not a night person when it comes to ideas. Really try to do yourself a favor to find "a morning" not every morning "a morning" where you can focus on that side hustle. If you know that like you get stressed out when the kids are around that is not the time to sit down and like swallow the frog and like work on the hard thing like that's the time to clean your inbox out. Make a fun game and so just really knowing what makes what lights your fire, what brings you joy, brings you energy. Kind of go back to the Rob Mack ... episode I think he's episode three and (Brad: I want to say two. Was it two?) No, no cuz two is a recap. Odds are guest interviews.

Brad Crowell  

Oh, right. Yes. (Lesley: Yes) The actual episode number three. (Lesley: Yeah) Nailed it. Nailed it.

Lesley Logan  

I'm so good. Anyways, he has happiness values and happiness islands and so he also did that as like confidence values, as a confidence islands on a talk you for Agency members. And so I think, one you're going to be constantly learning who you are. But if you are curious you will (Brad: Right) and you just keep making tweaks and changes like the beautiful thing going back to Erika Quest actually since we just spent the weekend together. She quotes Humble the Poet all the time. "We are not concrete, we are a construct and so the more you learn about yourself the changes that you'll make and then you'll experience that new change you made" and then you'll go, "Oh, oh I actually really liked that but I like it with water. Thank you." (Brad laughs) Like you're just gonna keep doing it. So, I say, "Know yourself that is a best way to be it till you see it."

Brad Crowell  

That's a that is amazing. And it's funny that's actually helped us with our business and our marriage because you're you are a morning ideas person and I am an a night ideas person. And so, you know, I know that I'm like completely ineffective in a brainstorming conversation first thing when I wake up, and you know, conversely, you are ineffective in at night when you're like, "I'm done. I'm ready to go to bed." (Lesley: Yeah. So we made it 10am) And yeah, so we we intentionally meet during the afternoon when both of us are firing at all cylinders because we know ourselves now.

Lesley Logan  

Right. And we don't try to change the other person. And I think that that's really key in any partnership, marriage or business. It's just if you can find a compromise, the middle of the day is really nice. And that might mean we can't meet with other people. But that's okay. (Brad: Yeah) That's what other times for. Yeah.

Brad Crowell  

I love it.

Lesley Logan  

I love this. I love the episode so much. Thank you, Dr. Kelly Bender for being our guests. And y'all, I want to know, Brad and I want to know how are you going to use these BE IT action in your life? Screenshot this. Tag us on Instagram. Tell us how you're going to use them and also tag Dr. Kelly Bender so that she can hear about it, too. It's going to bring her so much joy. (Brad: Totally) I just want to say this because it's so important that you know, every time you share this podcast, it is like gold. It is such amazing like you couldn't add more value if you wanted to. Like the best thing you can do for this podcast on any podcast you like is share it like even if you start in a text message, you talk about it. It's how the podcast grows. (Brad: Yeah) And we're on a mission to get hundred written reviews. 100 written reviews. So keep posting those because not only does it brighten my day, but it actually helps us get other guests and get other listeners to this podcast. We could bring more amazing episodes into your ears wherever you are in this world. Until next time, Be It Till You See It.

Brad Crowell  

Bye for now.

Lesley Logan  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And, follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!

Lesley Logan  

'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.

Brad Crowell  

It's written, produced, filmed and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan  

Kevin and Bel at Disenyo handle all of our audio editing and some social media content.

Brad Crowell  

Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan  

Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all the video each week so you can.

Brad Crowell  

And the Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

Dr. Kelly Bender is a California licensed Naturopathic Medical Doctor and she joined Lesley today to talk about moving to a new city, starting a business when you didn't know anyone, and listening with curiosity. Then they move on to being your own health advocate, taking stock of how you're feeling and how to take care of yourself.

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] .

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• Moving to a new city
• Starting a business
• Being your own health advocate
• Knowing when things are off
• Going to meetups in a new city
• Listening and being curious
• Put things in your physical Environment that make you feel that happiness or desired state
• Find the people in the room who are not like you
• Share your story with other people - celebrate where you’ve come from, your vulnerability allows others to see what’s possible
• Take stock of how you’re feeling and see where there could be potential improvement
• A big part of health is your mental/emotional health
• Get your body physically feeling like you want it to feel

Episode References/Links:

• Dr Kelly Bender's IG
• The Four Tendencies by Gretchen Rubin
• Sapiens by Yuval Noah Harari
• Believe It by Jamie Kern Lima
• Pure Vitality Rejuvenation Center's website

Guest Bio:

Dr. Bender is a California licensed Naturopathic Medical Doctor. As a graduate of Southwest College of Naturopathic Medicine, Dr. Bender is trained as an expert in natural medicine. After graduating summa cum laude with a Bachelor of Science in Pharmacology & Toxicology from the University at Buffalo and top of her class in medical school, she has continued her training in cutting edge therapies. Ketamine assisted therapy, regenerative medicine, bio-identical hormone replacement therapy and peptide therapy have been important additions to her practice to truly help individuals heal. She is passionate about helping individuals optimize their health so they can live their lives to the fullest. Dr. Bender believes it is important to understand the entire person in order to facilitate healing and offers each patient an individualized treatment plan to enhance their vitality. Dr. Bender enjoys teaching others, whether it be her patients or students at various medical schools. While she misses the fall weather back home in New York, she is happy to make Los Angeles her home.

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.

Resources

• Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!
• Lesley Logan website
• Be It Till You See It Podcast
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube
• Profitable Pilates

Social Media

• Instagram
• Facebook
• Tik Tok
• LinkedIn

Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan  

Hey! Hey you, welcome back to the Be It Till You See It. I am in love with this podcast and I'm in love with all of your takeaways and just the DMs we're getting and the questions you're sending us. It is incredibly, it's an incredible honor but also just so much fun for me and for Brad to bring news to you every single week. Today's guest is Dr. Kelly Bender. Not only is she a dear friend of mine, but she is a woman who definitely saved my life, my health. And I wanted to bring her in because she is a wealth of knowledge. And she has an incredible Be It Till You See It story. So for those of you who have moved to a new place, or you feel like you're new in something, you don't know what you're doing, I definitely want you to listen to the parts where she talks about being new in a city and starting a business without any information because they don't teach you that in school, and, and more. And then for those of you who are like not thinking about starting a business, there's still so much information in here on being an advocate for yourself and knowing when things are off. And so I really just think you're gonna find so many different gemstones no matter where you are in your life right now. So please do me a huge favor when this is all over, check out Dr. Kelly Bender on Instagram. And if you have any takeaways screenshot this and share it and tag us both so that we can see that it really does help us get this show out and and you know, we get to have more fun with you and with all the listeners. So thank you and right after this message is Dr. Kelly Bender.

Lesley Logan  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast, where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Lesley Logan  

Welcome to the podcast, Dr. Kelly Bender, and everyone who is listening. I'm so excited for you to meet this woman. I mean, you're gonna meet her in your ears. But if you're watching this on YouTube, you get to see your face. Y'all, this woman came into my life at a time when I needed her the most. And then she ended up coming on a retreat, so we got to know each other really well. But I happen to be in search of B12 shots. And this is where there's divine appointments and serendipity. I had heard about a space at about a mile from where I lived from an old client and then literally the old client they were going out for dinner and we ran into Dr. Bender and it became this wonderful friendship and I have her here because not only does she have a great Be It story, but she also has some great tips on like, reasons why maybe we just don't feel like being it all the time. So, Dr. Kelly Bender can you share with everyone, who you are, what you're up to all the things?

Kelly Bender  

Yeah, thank you so much for having me, Lesley, I'm really excited to be here. I love our conversations and I'm really excited that we get to record our conversations and other people get to hear what we talk about. (Lesley: Oh, I know ...) I think that it's so much fun.

Lesley Logan  

This is like a secret way for me to know more information. I'm just ... (Lesley laughs)

Kelly Bender  

Exactly. I'm so yeah, I am a California licensed naturopathic medical doctor, which means we try to look at the whole person and find out really what's going on with people. Instead of just giving medications or other things, we really do a lot of detective work to see if we can figure out why people are not feeling their best. My practice is here in Brentwood, Los Angeles, California, we do a lot of different types of therapies and modalities to try to pe... to get people to be really healthy and happy and vital. We try to have your body heal itself. And so I'm really passionate about helping people understand their bodies. And really, you know, not just do something because somebody told you to do it. I really want people to understand what's going on so they can make their own decision of, "Yeah, I want to take this thing today. I want to eat this way today because I know how it's going to make me feel."

Lesley Logan  

I love that that's probably another reason why we're friends. It's like the same way that I teach Pilates is I want people to be autonomous and I want them to know why they're doing an exercise and I want them to feel confident in choosing not to do that exercise to do something else and so I think that's really cool. There are very few people in the medical industry like you who are trying to help people be more educated and make a decision and almost it's almost like you're trying to teach them to be an advocate for themselves in their process.

Kelly Bender  

100%. Being an advocate and and you know your body much better than I do. Right? I've got the schooling, I've got the education. And so you know, hopefully I can be a guide. But at the end of the day, you're not going to call me every day and say, I mean, you could, you could definitely call me every day and say, "Hey, I'm feeling a little tired today. I'm feeling a little sore today, what do I do?" but that's not empowering for anybody. And that gets really, really expensive if you're going to do that. (Lesley laughs) So I would... I mean, "Hey, if you want to do that, I'm, I'm here. I'm happy to." But but I really want to empower people to understand and be intuitive with their body so that they can have an arsenal of all the different things and decide when they need to use them.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, well, and also, I mean, expensive too and almost overwhelming. Like, you might, you might think this is really nice. And you want to check in with your, with your doctor every day. But then like, you might have that rebellion. But it's like if you know, the four tendencies, it's an obliger-rebellion, when like, you're just like, "I'm over this." And so I think, (Kelly: Right) so much better to have the tools to do your own journaling, doing your own tracking, and then do check ins and tweaks when you feel like something is off. And so while it I wasn't off, and then I want to get into how you got started. How, like, what is the best way to give people the confidence or just feel okay with sometimes you might think something's off and then we are we tend to talk ourselves out of it, we tend to like excuse that off feeling like, "Oh, I just ate something bad" or "Oh, I just had a bad night's sleep" or, you know what I mean? Like, when is it that something is off? And when is it that we are? I don't know if I if you understand the question, I'm saying, but do you I mean?

Kelly Bender  

I do. Yeah, as humans. Okay, so there's this old adage of boiling a frog, right? So how do you boil a frog, if you put a frog in hot water, it will jump out. But if you put it in cold water, and you slowly turn up the temperature, it will just become complacent and say, "Oh, this is warm, this is warm, this is warm" to the point where it's boiling. And as humans, we we do that, right? We are adaptable, that's one of the strengths that we have as a species is we are really highly adaptable. And so oftentimes, you know, it's a slow, slippery slope to "Oh, I had, you know, I had some gas one day, but you know, it's just because I ate a lot of vegetables." And then, you know, you have diarrhea for a few days that "Oh, you know, it's because I was stressed," and then you've constipation for a few days. And it's, "Oh, it's because I was traveling." And then before you know it, it's six months down the down the line, and you haven't had a normal bowel movement for six months. Right? And so I think there is this fine line, and maybe it's not so fine. But there's definitely a line between being overly conscientious and overly anxious about our health where, yeah, you know, we all have days where we're a little ga... more gassy, we all have days, where, you know, things are a little bit more sluggish, or we're a little more tired. So just keeping track of it. And more than anything, if you can, if you can kind of get in touch with your body. I think a lot of times we're just show disconnected, we're still in our brain, right? And so you're thinking, you know, we go on WebMD, and you're thinking and it's all up here, right? It's like, "Oh, man," you know, fatigue and, and, you know, constipation and acid reflux, and you go and you're thinking about all the things that could be wrong. (Lesley: Right) More so I would say, sit with yourself, as opposed to looking externally, sit with yourself and say, "Okay, is this a feeling that I've had in the past? Did that feeling go away on it's own?" You know, "Is it just a temporary one day thing?" You know, "Does this feel abnormal to me," right? And so if it's a day or two, and it goes away, probably, you know, nothing to worry about. But if it's a day or two every week, then I would say, you know, track it a little bit. And if they're consistent, then something to pay attention to, but more than that, like really sit with your body and say, "Does this make sense? Why this is happening?" Oh, every time I eat dairy, I have friends who are lactose intolerant, and they still eat dairy all the time. And then ...

Lesley Logan  

... remember to do that and I'm like, "You can't eat it. That's like that's why you feel the way you feel." (Lesley laughs)

Kelly Bender  

Right? Right. That's the way you feel the way that you feel. And so you know, and then they get confused because they're like, "Oh, well, I eat dairy, dairy is in everything" and then their stomach is just never good, good. (Lesley: Yeah.) And then and then something else is happening like they have dysbiosis or they have a food sensitivity. You know, stress can also impact your digestion, and so they get confused between, "Oh, I never feel good because I'm always eating dairy" versus something else is going on. So it kind of masks that symptom. So, in general, if you're electing to do something that makes you feel not as well, I would take a break from that every once in a while to let that go away and see really how you feel. Same thing with like drinking alcohol.

Lesley Logan  

That's a great, that's actually really something anyone can do. You're not it's not like we're saying, do an elimination diet, it's like, the thing that makes you not feel so good, stop doing it and to see like what your baseline is, and, and you know, and what, and then you can be really in tune. And I just think, what I love that the common thread there is like, how are you feeling and what's normal for you. And it makes sense, because there really is no one size fits all what I love so much about interviewing different, amazing people like yourself is every time I ask them at the end, we'll and we'll ask you later, like, what are your steps to be in it, no one is repeating the same thing. So like, we're all so different. (Kelly: Yeah) And that means our health is going to be very unique. And so what feels normal to you and is going to be different, I want to take a step back to you starting this practice, because it's not easy to start any business. And if you you don't have like this, like bank account that's just rolling you through. It's very scary, and not only to do sort a new practice. But it's also very unique practice, because it's not something that you see everywhere. But you also started in a new city. And so I think a lot of people listening might be afraid to start something new and that they have the excuse. Well, "I'm new here. I don't know anyone," like I just really want them to hear your story. So, how did you get your practice going?

Kelly Bender  

Yeah, so um, I really believe in, you were talking about like, you know, divine (Lesley: appointments) interventions or divine appointments. And, you know, I'm I'm a planner, I am a I am a builder, I'm a designer. And throughout medical school for four years, I was designing what I thought was going to be my life, my practice, what I was going to do, and I will tell you right now, none of it happened that way. (Lesley laughs) 0%, 0%, and I'm so glad, I am so glad that it happened the way that it happened. And it turned out even better than I planned. Right? So, medical school - shocker - you don't learn how to run a business (Lesley: No) in medical school. Right?

Lesley Logan  

No. So, why teachers don't either fitness instructors or either lawyers, either. I'm like, "I don't even know (Kelly: No) what people are going to school for." Because they don't actually why they can't be, it's why a lot of people aren't successful in those things. And it's, or they have imposter syndrome, because how you don't know what you don't know.

Kelly Bender  

You don't know what you don't know. And and you know, enough in medical school to to be scared. Because you know, when medicine there's a lot of liability, right? There's a lot of rules of what you can and cannot do. So so go back to 2013, I originally wanted to work for a nonprofit. I started a nonprofit when I was in medical school. We did free care for people like low income people in the States. And we also have clinics in Mexico, Haiti and Thailand. And so (Lesley: Cool) I that's what I, yeah, so that's what I thought I was going to do my whole four years of medical school, that was the plan. And then I realized in my fourth year how much debt I was going to have and how much I needed to pay every month to be able to pay that off. And working for a nonprofit was not a good option at that point. So, I quickly pivoted and decided to move to LA, because why not? My brother lived here and I had come out to visit. I'm originally from New York. And so I knew that I wanted to try something different. I knew I didn't want to go back to the cold weather. And I figured I'll give it a try. If I don't like it, I can always move again. So, so I moved out to California, I moved out to Los Angeles without really knowing anyone, anyone and decided to start a business. So I found a little office space to rent and I read a lot of books and I read a lot of blogs and I watched a lot of YouTube videos on how to set up a corporation and I was sitting in this little bedroom that I rented out in a house with this this older lady and I remember like sitting on my bed, filling out the fictitious business paperwork and feeling anxious. Am I doing this right? I don't have money to pay for a lawyer. You know, (Lesely: Oh) if I do this wrong, what's going to happen?

Lesley Logan  

I um completely understand, and I love the visual of you sitting in a little office just like watching YouTube videos on how to do this. Because that's, I mean, like, a lot of people might be like, "I want to get started," honestly, that's what we that's what everyone gets started and everyone is like, "Am I doing this right? I don't know, I can't afford a lawyer to look this over." Sure, hope so I remember I got a letter in the mail from LA. They're like, "We can see you're doing business here. So here's what you owe us in taxes." I was like, "Oh, well, thanks for letting me know. Not a problem. Here's a check." I was like, "Thank God, they did ..." So they don't arrest you, but they will (Kelly: Yeah) send you a bill. (Lesley laughs)

Kelly Bender  

Right. And usually, there's some late fees associated (Lesley: Yeah) (Lesley laughs) with, you know, much cheaper than (Lesley: My lawyer, yeah) otherwise, that could turn out much cheaper than a lawyer, much cheaper than a lawyer. Yeah, it's like, "Okay, great. I'll..." And you know, most places where people open businesses, they want you to be successful, right? You're, you're part of the economy, you're driving, you know, you're driving the economy. So they want to get their money because their business too, but usually, they'll they'll work with you. And they'll let you know, like, "Hey, this is how you were supposed to do it. You're delinquent, you have to pay us some extra money. But like, here's how to do it right." And so, yeah, when I first got to LA, man, what it is like, what a different world from the East Coast where I grew up from Arizona, which is where I did my medical school. So I came out here and knew almost no one, set up my business, didn't know what I was doing from a business standpoint, you know, had to figure it out pretty much on my own. I didn't have business mentors, I didn't grow up around people who owned their own businesses. It was not part of my, my culture, it was not part of anything I'd ever seen done before. And so honestly, one of the things that I did that was the most helpful was I started going to meetups, five or six nights a week, when I first moved to LA, this was, you know, pre COVID, obviously. So ...

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, something went possible, but I (Kelly: Yeah) so I love this part of you, getting out there, getting to know, getting to get your business started was like getting just going to places to, just finding places you could immerse yourself, (Kelly: Yeah) which is super scary. So, what did you tell yourself before you walk into these rooms?

Kelly Bender  

It's so interesting. So, I specifically went to meetups that were not medical related. So most of the people I knew who were doctors, they went to all these medical ones to network with other medical professionals, there was like, first of all, I want to friends who are not doctors. Second of all, I like you're not going to become my patients, your doctors. And third, I actually went to a lot of one of them that were like business oriented, because I was like, "I need friends or people who are in business to help me learn how to do this." And so, you know, I would I would psych myself up. And I this is not a thing that I love to do. So I really, you know, there was a lot of anxiety before everyone, but I was like, you know, what's the worst that can happen? That's what I would tell myself, "What's the worst that can happen? You're going to go, you're going to meet some interesting people. And if you don't like them, you never have to see them again." So that's the nice thing about meetups is everybody is there to network. So different than going to a bar or something like that, like, everyone knows that's the deal. So you go up and you tell your story, and you hand out business cards. Um ...

Lesley Logan  

How did you (Kelly: and it was ...) introduce yourself? Because I feel like this is like where I could ultimate Be It moment could be because you didn't have like a thriving practice at this point yet you were filling (Kelly: I know) out forms. So, how, what was the introduction that you gave?

Kelly Bender  

Yeah, so most of the time, like I said, I was the only doctor there. I remember really specifically going to these tech startups, because I love technology. And I was like, "Oh, these people don't know anything about health." They're, you know, a bunch of guys most of the time. And I know this is a stereotype but it's true. A bunch of men in a room eating like cheetos and drinking soda, right? (Lesley: Yeah) And so, and now they're the people who have money, right? (Lesley: Yeah) Who can afford kind of like alternative care. And so I would go to these a lot of these types of meetings. And listen, that is that is the most important thing. Most people go into these situations, and they're just focused on getting other people to know what they do. Right? So everyone is talking past each other because everyone's primary goal is to download my information to you. Right? And so I just went in and I listened and I was curious. Those I think are the two big things for me was was listening and being curious. And then I would say, "Oh, that's you know, that's really interesting. You do X, Y or Z. Have you ever considered this thing over here?" And I would just ask really interesting questions about them or their work. And then people got interested in me. Right? Then they would say, "Oh my gosh, that's such a great question. No one's ever asked me that question before. What do you do? Are you a CEO? Are you a venture capitalist? What do you do?" And I would just sit there and say, "I'm a doctor." Mind blown! (Lesley laughs) Every single one of them, they were like, "Whoa, okay, like, tell me about what you ..." and then and then they were really engaged. Right? ... that that was the way ...

Lesley Logan  

This is so cool. I hope you're all hearing this. This is if you have anxiety in rooms, if you are wearing an introvert flag, if you are wearing the shy flag, like here, she didn't, she actually went and listened, which is some, it's actually, it's not actually easier to do, but it's definitely less anxiety producing and then you got curious. And then and then because of that, they're super intrigued by you, which is like the best thing and building relationships. And so ... (Kelly: Totally) how so how many meetups did you go to? Like, how many? Or do you still go to them.

Kelly Bender  

So, I stopped probably after about a year and a half, or maybe about a year, I was going to no lie five or six a week, and a lot of them are the same. So, I would go you know, every month or so and kind of keep up with some of the same people. And they you know, would become patient or they would become friends. A lot of the friends that I have here in LA are from these, these meetups, you know from eight, nine years ago. And so it helped me build a build a network, it helped me build friends. And, and it helped me build my business acumen. I consult so part of, you know, I have my medical practice, but I also do a lot of consulting with businesses from the medical side. So, I will be the medical expert, if somebody wants to start any sort of medical type business. And I also consult with doctors and clinics, in how to set up their business and set up their operations. So, I have become kind of this bridge.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, you also (Kelly: between the two) have, it's like the ultimate Be It, like you were acting as if, like so you're doing all the things to start a business, then you (Kelly: Yeah) change your environment many times because you move but also like you change people you surround yourself with. And then you and now you are literally being the consultant, being the guy, being the thing to everyone else and in your industry, and then also people who want to have a part with your industry, that is so cool. It's like no stopping it. So, okay, um, this, this is really interesting. Um, I want to go to the, the the be... changing your environment up, because I do think that that is where a lot of people get stuck, you know, especially if you're like, "Well, Lesley and Kelly, I can't move. I can't move to LA, (Kelly: right) how do I do this?" So for the person who's like, not able to physically move to change their environment, what are some tips you have for them to change the surroundings that they're in to be able to not just be a bridge, but to be it and to get get connected with more people?

Kelly Bender  

Yeah, so I mean, there's, there's different pieces to your environment, I personally find space, like the environment that I'm in, in my home, at my office to be really important and impactful for me. So even if you're just kind of moving things around, or getting lovely plants ... from my plant ...

Lesley Logan  

If you're watching us on YouTube, you will have to see all the plants, I mean, her plant game is strong.

Kelly Bender  

It makes me so happy, honestly. So, you know, one of the big things that I tell people you know, the Be It Till You See It kind of thing is, "Putting things in your physical environment that make you feel happy, or that make you feel that desired state." So one of the things is I I've got, you know, I've got my plants, I've got my crystals, you know, I've got all of the things that kind of just make me feel like, I'm that person. And one of the biggest things that changed. I had some money mindset stuff. You know, being a doctor, being a care provider, I just like giving care for free, right? Like, I just wish I could give care for free. It makes me feel so good. But that's not a sustainable business model. (Lesley laughs) And so, so what I did when I wanted to change how I felt about money was I took two $100 bills and put it I have this little kind of seashell type thing that I put them in with with my amethyst from when I was little on top of it. And it's right over here where I do my work and I just have it there and it's like, you know, money's around, money is available if I need if I need a hundred bucks, I could grab it from there. Right? I don't, because I'm just putting it there. But physically putting the things in your space to remind you of what you want to grow and what you want to focus on, I think is really important. (Lesley: Oh, I love this.) Yeah. And then absolutely, like, changing, not changing, but adding people to your, to your environment, to your to your friends group, find the people who are not like you. That's, that's what I would say, a lot of times, we tend to, you know, be friends with the people that are very similar to us, because they reinforce our, our beliefs, and you know, it makes us feel good about ourselves. But I would, I would encourage you to find people who are very different from you, because they're going to have life experiences, and they're going to have skill sets that are complimentary to yours that you might, that you might need, or you might benefit from. I started working with very, very, very, very high net worth individuals, and completely changed how I saw life, how I, how I saw my own, like how I run my household, just seeing how people run their household, how they run staff, helped me understand what was possible.

Lesley Logan  

I couldn't agree more. Having moved, I've definitely, environment change, but also like building new relationships out here. And it's a little tricky in a COVID world. So really, our life in Las Vegas started April 2021. We're like, "Okay, we're going out, we're excited (Kelly: yeah) about this, we're going to meet people," but I've been really conscious of meeting people that I normally wouldn't meet, that I nor.... that I normally wouldn't have a reason to connect with. And that is does take effort, but I think it is so important. I also having been from a family that was not entrepreneurial like me, not that they weren't, there just wasn't anyone own their own business, you know, in my immediate family. For me to learn from to see that was possible, having clients in LA who do have that high net worth, you hear what they stress about, which was not what I was stressing about, you hear it like, "And there's some good and bad things, they don't do everything, you don't need to assume all of their behaviors," but you do see possibilities and I and that I'm grateful for the time I had in LA, because literally you learn that you can just create money because or that money is all around because people just find it. And they the people who are creating businesses, there aren't like going, "Oh, you pull my savings." They're like, "Oh, no, I'm raising money for this." And you're like, "You can raise like, people just give money for things?" Like ... (Lesley laughs)

Kelly Bender  

Right? What? (Lesley: Yeah) Yeah, I really do think, you know, one of the most important things, I think for the Be It Till You See It is sharing your story with other people. And so, you know, even if you don't think that you are where you want to be, right, sharing your story, either where you are, where you've been, is, is helpful for you to celebrate how much you've changed, or where you've come from, which I think is really important. And that vulnerability with other people, just like we're doing now it allows them to see what's possible. And then they share with you, you know, maybe I've had patients who are extremely successful in business, like, you know, financially really successful. And they, you know, they see that as a success, but they want to be more successful in let's say, their spiritual life or their mental emotional life. And, and so when I hear their stories of how they've worked through things from a business standpoint, I'm like, "Oh, that's how you do that." And then they hear my stories of how I worked through, you know, emotional things, or you know, family things or trauma that's happened. And they're like, "Oh, that's how you do that." (Lesley: Yeah) So it's, it's sharing with people who have all different experiences, I think is for me, the most important.

Lesley Logan  

Well, and you know, we the reason that the human humans as a species have evolved and survived is because of stories. And like if you read the book Sapiens, it's like this whole the ability to storyteller is how we survive tigers and holes. And then also we can share things. We can keep talking for hours, but I have to ask this one question before (Kelly: Yeah) we take a break. I want to because I'm sure people are going, "Okay." But we got this doctor on the show. Is there anything that we can be doing, supplements anything I know that you're we can't just prescribe things so we're not prescribing anything (Kelly: Yeah) but are there are there tips for people that they might want to pay attention to, that might be holding them back health wise from be it till they see it.

Kelly Bender  

Yeah, that's a that's a great question. So again, I would say, you know, take stock of how you're feeling and see, you know, where you think there could be some potential improvements, I would say a big, a big part of health is your mental emotional health. And especially with being it until you see it, you want to make sure you're in a really good mind state, right? They talk about like, these flow states, which flow state is basically like alpha brainwaves, it's actually how your brain is functioning. And so you know, doing meditation or journaling or breath work or something to physically get your body into that flow state. You know, get your body physically feeling like you want it to feel, even if you're like, "You know, I feel really good today," or getting up in the morning and doing a dance party and that, you know, I have so much energy, even on the days you don't have energy, right? It's okay, if you don't have energy, you don't have to push yourself or you know, pretend that you're some way but, but if you're like, "Okay, I'm gonna get up and I'm gonna, I'm gonna move my body and I'm gonna get into the mind state of, you know, I'm energized, I'm, I'm feeling strong," that will help your brain get into the, get into that loop or that pattern of, "I'm feeling good, I have energy," you know ...

Lesley Logan  

I love that it just kind of goes back to like just getting to know yourself and then also like, an even on the good days practicing it and not just the days that we need it like, that's, (Kelly: Yeah) that's the trick. (Lesley laughs)

Kelly Bender  

Yeah, and also so like smiling, even if you don't want to smile, right? Just our body remembers these cues. And so just smiling can actually change your your brain chemistry. So if you're not feeling really good, just go look in the mirror, and smile and work on gratitude and let that sink in. And that will actually change your biochemistry that will actually change your neuro chemistry. So, you know ...

Lesley Logan  

You know what I love about all this, none of it is taking anything like in, it is all things so you have the power of doing all of them are free things. All of them are ways to be in the state that you really are trying to be in all the time and so thank you for that. That's I love being surprised but also you know, it made me think of this one thing. Jamie Kern Lima's book "Believe It," she gave a tip of like giving people what you need. So, if you're needing like (Kelly: Yeah) someone to see you, make sure you look at people in the eye and smile at them and see them (Kelly: Yeah) so they're gonna do ... they're gonna see how and they're gonna smile right back, you know, or if you're (Kelly: Absolutely) if you're needing people to love you, give people love and you just this amazing reciprocity thing. So all right, Dr. Kelly Bender, where can people find you? How can they follow you? Become your friend, stalk you a little bit? Where do you hang out?

Kelly Bender  

Um, Kreation Cafe in Los Angeles. (Lesley laughs) I'm most most of the time you can probably find me there.

Lesley Logan  

Do you get the pumpkin bread?

Kelly Bender  

No, it has eggs in it.

Lesley Logan  

Oh, I don't think so, well, I get it's vegan. Check it out ...

Kelly Bender  

Well, I have to look at it. Okay, I have to get the vegan one ...

Lesley Logan  

Check it out because I get a vegan one because I can't do the eggs either. I get a vegan (Kelly: I know) and they have a paleo bread as well that (Kelly: Yeah) is egg free. So anyways,

Kelly Bender  

They they have a vegan gluten free brownie. (Lesley: Oh) It's the best thing ...

Lesley Logan  

With CBD in it by the way.

Kelly Bender  

They do have on the CBD. I don't get the one with CBD. (Lesley: Okay) But it is it is the best thing ever ... So ...

Lesley Logan  

It is like ... that they did ... it's really hard to do vegan gluten free brownies. (Kelly: I know) And they did a great job because it doesn't just crumble all over you. It's moist. It's gooey. (Kelly: Yeah) Anyways, they did not sponsor this podcast, but every time (Kelly laughs) I go to LA, I do go to Kreation and stock up and when my husband sees it in my purse, he just laughs (Lesley laughs)

Kelly Bender  

Yeah. Nailed it. So yes, most most days you'll probably find me there for some one of the one of my meals. But my clinic is in Brentwood, Los Angeles. It's called Pure Vitality Rejuvenation Center. The website is www.purevitalitycenter.com. So you can go and check us out on the website. We also have Instagram, which have been doing some more Instagram lives. I think I'm going to try and do an Instagram live every day for a week. (Lesley: Oh so fun.) Even if it's just like two or three minutes because Instagram keeps updating and every time I go to save the live to my role. Something else is different that I can't figure out how to do it. So I think I just need to you talk about you know (Lesley: Be It Till You See It ... I love it) Be It Till You See It ... I'm gonna be this Instagram, awesome person, and I'm gonna practice and practice and practice. And then hopefully by the end of the week, I'll actually be a professional at it.

Lesley Logan  

I love it. Yeah, I just have to say this, I have three Instagram handles, right and which is annoying. And here's what I hate the most is when one of them updates, but the other two don't. So currently on the @be_it_pod Instagram, where how I share my story is very different than how I did on the other two. And I'm like, "Alright, y'all, this is ..." (Kelly: no) I'm a I'm a native ada... a tech adapter, right? I am attack native, elder millennial (Kelly: yeah) right here, you (Kelly: yeah) can't give it to me, change them all at the same time. (Lesley laughs)

Kelly Bender  

Right, or just don't change them. I honestly just be two and a half minutes yesterday when I started my Instagram live, to figure out how to do it. So anyway, um, you can follow me on Instagram at @purelyvital p u r e l y v i t a l. I think I'm going to try to do that the next week or so. We'll see technically, you know, all the all the technical parts ...

Lesley Logan  

Well, we'll have all of these links in the show notes. Kreation, you'll just have to look up I don't want to actually stalking her. So okay, so I asked every guest this and you've given some great tips. So if you want to just recap them, that's totally fine. But I think it's really awesome to be inspired. But I actually think people need to take messy action because that's where clarity comes from. That's where anxiety is overridden. So bold, executable, intrinsic, targeted steps that people can do to be it till you see it, what are your favorite things to do?

Kelly Bender  

So the first thing is know yourself, honestly, I think for me, that's the most important piece. Also, do the things that you want to do. Don't wait till you have the money. Don't wait until you have the time. Because you'll never have what you want of both things. So you and I have our boozy spa days. And it's like, we just put it on the calendar. And we go and we do it. So do do the things that you want to do. And also, I would say be curious, be curious about yourself. Be curious about other people. Really, you know, try to look at the world through the you know, through the child's eyes, or you know, through the novice lens, because that's going to help you grow into what you want to be, but also help you see when you've become that.

Lesley Logan  

Oh, those are juicy. I love them. I'm ... excited. This is my favorite part of the podcast because I'm like, "Oh, I'm gonna try that one. That one's new for me." Dr. Kelly Bender, thank you for being here on the show. Everyone, thank you (Kelly: Thank you) so much for listening. Do us a humungous favor, screenshot this podcast right now. Tag pure, @purelyvital, and @be_it_pod and put your takeaway on here so that we can see what your favorite part of this show was. And do us a favor and make sure you share this with your friends that is how this podcasts gets out. That's how all podcasts get out. So if you love a podcast, you could share it every week. Don't worry, I will still love it. It will still feel fresh and new to me. So thank you so much and until next time, Be It Till You See It.

Lesley Logan  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And, follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!

Lesley Logan  

'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.

Brad Crowell  

It's written, produced, filmed and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan  

Kevin and Bel at Disenyo handle all of our audio editing and some social media content.

Brad Crowell  

Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan  

Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all the video each week so you can.

Brad Crowell  

And the Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

Lesley and Brad recall last episode's interview with Jessica Valant, digging into messaging vs products, finding a community when you move to a new city, Momentum Fest, handling regret and more.

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] .

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• Your problem is with your messaging, not your product
• When you confuse you lose
• How you find a community when you move to a new city
• Finding online meetup groups
• Momentum Fest 2022 is scheduled
• How to handle regret
• Being open to getting information (before you need it)
• Decide what you actually want

Episode References/Links:

• Profitable Pilates is hosting a fitness business retreat in March of 2022
• Bright Side Up by Amy Spencer
• Momentum Fest

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.

Resources

• Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!
• Lesley Logan website
• Be It Till You See It Podcast
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube
• Profitable Pilates

Social Media

• Instagram
• Facebook
• Tik Tok
• LinkedIn

Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Lesley Logan  

Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co host in life, Brad and I are going to dig into the permissive convo I had with Jessica Valant in our last episode. If you haven't yet listened to that episode, go back, listen to it and come back and do this one or listen to this one. See if you like what you heard, and then go back and be really honest, Brad and I were talking about how like frickin' smart, intelligent and I don't know like ... (Brad: Profound) profound, I know. (Brad laughs) I know ... this one definitely could have left profound it but we've used it before. Anyways, it's so good. So you listen to this and listen to that do whatever order you want. Alright, so okay, you guys, we were kind of keeping this little thing on the DL. We were like you know, working like little I don't know a Santa's elves in the back and mostly because I was just kind of nervous of it not happening after after the last 20 months I'm a little tired of disappointing people and ...

Brad Crowell  

Announcing things and then being like, just (Lesley: Yeah) kidding (Lesley: Just kidding.) 

Lesley Logan  

But we announced our first in person business retreat here in Las Vegas ... where we call home and at the time of this recording it only has like seven spots left (six spots left, seven spots left.) So here's what's happening, Brad you want to tell him what we're doing?

Brad Crowell  

Yeah. 100% yo ... 

Lesley Logan  

We're not doing that we're not teaching you any of that. (Brad: .com) (Lesley and Brad laughs) Don't go there.

Brad Crowell  

So, actually what we're doing is a we're hosting a fitness business coaching retreat slash take time for yourself retreat.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, it is. So here's the thing what I know, I know that everyone's like, "Just give me all the strategy" and we can, we absolutely have all the strategies and we're going to give every single retreat or all of that but I also know that without self care, without a balance of that then you as the leader on the driver of your dreams is going to burn out and then you're gonna (Brad: Yeah) blame your dreams and or the people getting in the way of your dreams and (Brad: Sure) if I only had, if I should have like I should have done and all that stuff and so what we want to teach you in this like four ish day retreat is (Brad: five day, four night) Oh, there it is, is how to balance a day where you take care of yourself, you move your body, you take care, you do some self care and you learn a ton of frickin' strategy like bus loads.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah .... What we're gonna really work on we're gonna dig deep into the customer journey and if that's a new concept for you, that's okay. But generally it's the the idea of where do they come from and when they meet you quote unquote "meet you" probably online somewhere. What do they get from you? And then how do you help them graduate from getting something at the beginning of your program to the next step where they're buying something more then the next step where they're buying something more, then next step where they're buying something more (Lesley: Yeah) and it continues to move forward and you're you know you're serving the people that you're connecting with.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, we also have talks on project management, driving like creating a schedule that allows you to implement all the strategies we're doing this with. Your messaging to your clients because I actually think that most people don't have a problem with having an amazing product, they have a problem with messaging and telling people that it's for them. (Brad: Yes) And so we're going to go through all of this plus so much more. And what what it really should help you do is organize all those amazing thoughts and amazing things you've created into a way that allows people to go, "Yeah, you're the person for me," because when you confuse you lose I didn't say that first, but whoever did is a genius. (Brad laughs) Anyways, where (Brad: I love it.) where can they sign up if there's any spots left?

Brad Crowell  

Okay, just go to https://ProfitablePilates.com/retreat

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, perfect. Go there. If it's sold out, then you'll see a waitlist for the next one. (Brad: Yepper) Yeah, so that's just frickin' blown away. And it's like so real because at the time we're doing this, it's basically sold out.

Brad Crowell  

Oh, it's gonna happen in March of next year. Lesley: Oh, that's helpful.) Yeah, March, March 2 through 6.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah and that means it's like lovely spring desert weather. I'm not gonna lie. I really do hope the cactuses are blooming for y'all ... 

Brad Crowell  

And borderline chilly. So like bring a light sweater.

Lesley Logan  

It's a, it's a world of desert. It's like it's cold in the morning, and then the sun comes out and you're like, "Let me be in the sun" and then the sun goes down. You're like, "Let me put on a nice jacket." (Brad: Yeah) (Brad laughs) Yeah. So anyway ...

Brad Crowell  

It's gonna be amazing ... We already have an incredible group ... coming, it's going to be fantastic.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, I love, I love early adopters. (Lesley laugsh) That's that's who we are. Okay, so, um, we have a question from a listener.

Brad Crowell  

Yes, we do. And it is all about basically, when we moved here to Vegas, especially last year, in COVID we were never leaving our place. And the question is, "How do you find a community when you move to a new city?" And I'm going to add comma, especially during COVID. (Lesley: Yeah) So ...

Lesley Logan  

I think this is also like comma / I'm introverted, which was that that's you know. (Brad: Yeah) And also like I posted about our our bike riding such how this (Brad: Ah, that's right.) gonna came up (Brad: Yeah, last night.) Yeah, cuz we, we work we we got invited to a cycle art movement. It wasn't ...

Brad Crowell  

It was like a hangout (Lesley: It was a hang.) It was a super cool hang, where we're basically a local business owner in the arts district near where we live, decided, "Hey, let's let's let's go for a bike ride around the arts district." And everybody will pick a personal favorite piece of street art. And they'll figure out what is the story behind it, and they can explain it to the group. And so it was a it was a great excuse to ride around, stop at a bar for a drink, go to the next piece of art, meet somebody, (Lesley: Yeah) go to their house, like all this fun stuff, where Lesley and I would never have taken the time to just ride in circles around that 15 block radius and just look at stuff before slash get to know a bunch (Lesley: Yeah) of people we didn't know. So that was super, super fun.

Lesley Logan  

It was so fun. So ... first, here's how I got to be friends with the person that started the thing. So we said "yes" to a random birthday party. And my introverts out there... I hear you. Let me tell you saying yes that was hard because I know it's coming off of four days at Momentum Fest, oddly enough that's who are our who are the the founder of that as our guests are you recapping this week, but I was like, "This is gonna be great. A birthday party, this is where people are." How do we get to know the person invited us to the birthday party? We went to a shop owned by a local, and we made that shop our shop, like, we just kept going ... 

Brad Crowell  

It's a fun shop. It's like a store for buying home goods. And they're like cute and fun. And they they're a little funky, they have and then the the couple that runs the store are very friendly. And you (Lesley: Yeah) know, it was just really fun to meet them. And we every time we were like, "Let's go out," we would always stop by there, too.

Lesley Logan  

We should have them on as a guest.

Brad Crowell  

I think that's definitely a great idea.

Lesley Logan  

Okay, we're gonna do that. So anyways, so so how, so this is what I did. I'm an introvert. But I also really love when people start their own business. And I really love supporting local businesses. And so I just, we just would go and then we talked to the owners. And I mentioned that we both have done retail and so we got to know them. And then I just made an intention, an intentional effort to go to their store every time I was in the arts district and say "hi" to them, say (Brad: Yeah) hi to their names. They would ask me, "How I was doing?" and I would actually tell them what was going on in my life. This is huge. If you're trying to make friends. You can't like ...

Brad Crowell  

You can't be like, "Oh, I'm good."

Lesley Logan  

I'm good. Life is good. (Brad: That is a word.) I'm busy. No, you actually have to be vulnerable. (Brad: Yeah.) And you have to share like, "Oh my..." I said, "Oh, my dad's about to move in. I've never had a parent live with me before." (Lesley laughs) And they're like, "Oh," and they're like they talked about how they just had a baby and one of their parents moved in to help them. And so those kinds of things allow you to get to know someone we share, we exchanged Instagram handles that's the new thing on the street these days. And and that's how they invited us to that we said yes to that. I know ... well, that's another thing that we'll talk about another day. But um, and then we said "yes" to the birthday party. And we went (Brad: Yeah) and we made sure to be, this is not something we should up late to, we showed up on time. And we were intentional to talk to people in the room, not just the people. This is the scary part, shy people, introverted people. We didn't wait, we didn't stand there and wait for the birthday people to come. We like literally ...

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, before the birthday, it was a surprise, right? So the wife was there coordinating and the husband didn't know that it was a surprise party. So, but we showed up early and we just started you know, shaking hands. And you know, like, it was cool, because we were all in on the secret. And so therefore, it was not weird to just like, "Hey, how are you? Who are you what, you know, how are you connected here?" And it made sense to, you know, easily say "hi" to a bunch of people. And from that we met (Lesley: The Layer Lounge.) Yeah, we met this lady who runs a business down the street from where the movie theater was.

Lesley Logan  

And she's going to be on the podcast soon. But because I just friggin' love her story. But here's this if you're shy, if you're introverted, guess what? People love to answer questions about themselves. (Brad: Yeah, yeah) Did you actually can totally skirt around you if you're like, "Oh my God, I'm freaking out. I can't believe Brad and I now our time to go to a stranger's birthday party," literally ask people like, "Hey, how do you know the birthday person?"

Brad Crowell  

Yeah. And then just let them respond. The truth is, this is like sales 101. People love to talk, they love to talk about themselves, they love to be an authority on a subject. And if you set them up to be any of those things in conversation, it's a great way to get the ball rolling in a conversation where you can then continue to ask questions that, you know, help the conversation continue to move along. And then you can begin to interject you know, certain things of your own. That would make sense, obviously. So yeah, it's a it's a very simple sales tactic is to just get somebody else talking.

Lesley Logan  

Well, I hate that you said sales. And that's, of course, but anyway ...

Brad Crowell  

I mean, that's why my, my background is it's it becomes a conversation, (Lesley: Yeah) it's actually a better way to put it instead of sales is, it's the art of conversation. (Lesley: Yeah) Set someone up so that they can talk about something that they feel comfortable with. And then they're not, there's not going to be this weird, awkward conversation, because they're very excited about it.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah. And then they're going to ask you a question, which keeps it going, you'll answer it. (Brad: Right) I knew, ideally, keep the loop open. (Lesley laughs) And you just keep going and then if it comes to an end, and you don't like this person, and you're like, "I don't know how I feel about this person," you go to the next person, you make eye contact, you say, "It's so nice to meet you. (Brad: Yeah) I'm really excited to be here and get to know people." And it was weird, and so okay, we still haven't gotten to community. So now we have a (Brad laughs) friend, and we know a few people. And so guess what I did? I scheduled a frickin' facial and I made sure I scheduled it with the owner. (Brad: Yeah.) And then I got to talk to her some more, right?

Brad Crowell  

And then she said, "Hey, Brad, happy birthday. I'm getting you a facial." (Lesley: Yeah) So then the two of us went in and then her dad, "Hey, you know, I'm going to go with my dad" (Lesley: Yeah) and and it just kind of kept rolling for them.

Lesley Logan  

So, I supported them and got to know them and they got to know me. And then I this is a cool thing about Instagram is I got to see what events they were doing. And I just started putting myself in these events. Y'all, I was I'm exhausted ended, I get up at 5am. It's not like, I'm like, "Yes, let's go out at 7:30 and do this thing." (Brad laughs) But if you want a community, this is the things you have to do. (Brad: Yeah) Now the cool thing is, is once you have the people, you can go, "Hey, let's do lunch instead of the 7:30 (Brad laughs) gratitude thing that you're doing." (Lesley laughs) Right? But like that's how he did it. And so I've gotten to know them. I've been consistently putting myself in, we've been going to this these things consistently to meet people, for them to get to know us. And then we got invited to this biking event. (Brad: Yeah) And it's so fun, because maybe we don't love that, maybe we who knows what happens when the people we met. But we now have a double date on the books for next week. We have our we know a pair a pair of neighbors that we can go walking around the block with. (Brad: Yup) And so it's the opportunity for the relationship that has been put, it's like a little seed to for Brad's cactus show into germination. And you know, it takes four months to germinate a cactus seed, it does, it might take four months to germinate your community. But you want to be ...

Brad Crowell  

I'd say that's that process for us started six months ago, right? (Lesley: Yeah) Yeah.

Lesley Logan  

So just be intentional about it, your time is very precious. So the reason we chose, I chose local businesses is because usually the owner of the business is there. And if I like their shop, I'm probably gonna like them. So that's kind of my MO. And if none of that sounds good to you, then I would here's the thing. You might not like the "book of faces," but their groups are freaking awesome. And there's a group for every city and you can just go in there once a week for 15 minutes and answer people's questions, and then start to ask your own and then there's a Vegas women's one, and it is on fire. People are setting up meeting dates all the time. So there's that.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, well, that's a great question.

Lesley Logan  

I loved it. We can talk more about it. Stay tuned. To be continued on the friendships we've built. (Brad laughs) I'm really excited about them now. We actually you know what's really funny is last night someone suggested we have a housewarming party.

Brad Crowell  

Oh, how hilarious was that?

Lesley Logan  

And so here's the thing. I real... didn't realize we didn't have one because of COVID. Like ... (Brad: Then even consider it) But also we didn't have people to invite to the party. (Brad: Rright) Now, we do ...

Brad Crowell  

And it was really funny too, because it wouldn't be now it's even that was so we didn't plant the seed of that. She did. She was like, "Hey, I'm inviting myself over to your house warming party (Lesley: Yeah) that you never even talked about." And we were like, "Oh, (Lesley: Yeah) okay, we're totally open to that." (Brad laughs)

Lesley Logan  

I love her. I loved it. And I was like, "You know what?" We should totally like I have the group thread from the biking thing I can totally with those people alone and go, "Hey, now that we have friends to invite to our house, here's what we're doing it (Lesley laughs) just bring a coat because it's cold at night." House warming. (Lesley laughs) (Brad: So funny.) So fun, anyways, (Brad: Great question.) Yeah, I love it. Okay.

Brad Crowell  

All right. Now let's talk about Jessica Valant.

Lesley Logan  

I love her so much.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, me too. She is really lovely and her husband Brian, but let's tell you a little bit about Jessica. Jessica Valant is a Pilates teacher and physical therapist. She's a former studio owner. She's a mom of two, a spouse and co founder of Momentum Fest. So many of you out there probably know what Momentum Fest is, especially if you're in the Pilates world, but it's more than just Pilates. It is an international movement festival held each year in Denver. The questions that Jessica asked herself have helped her build a large community on YouTube. They've helped her juggle the work life schedule of kids being home almost all the time, even when she has to film classes. And also to know when she has too many priorities which of course if you listen to last week's episode, you would understand what what I'm referencing there. It was such a great convo, I continuously found myself going, "Wow, that's an awesome question that she asked herself. Wow, that's an awesome question (Lesley: I know) that she asked herself."

Lesley Logan  

I was like, "How ... where'd she come out these questions?" (Brad: Yeah) They're a list of questions we should all be asking ourselves like, "Where's that book? I want that book." Tell me that book everyone it's on the new, it's on the new book club we haven't created. (Brad laughs)

Brad Crowell  

Well, anyway you know the ... she had so many takeaways, so many points that I I actually when I was producing the episode I I was going down one path and realized, "Wow, this could this could go two or three different ways" and I had to kind of sit back listen to the whole thing, then go back and really listen to it again. And decide what to actually talk about today. So...

Lesley Logan  

And you know can I just talk about two things a "Momentum Fest 2022" is scheduled. (Brad: Oh good.) So check out their Instagram for the exact dates. (Brad: Lovely) It's the end of June and so that's where they're exciting. And also talk about "building a community" she reached the heck out to me to get to know me. (Brad: Right) And so that's how we became friends and we still talk regularly and what I love about our friendship is we can go months without ever having a conversation, send a text message, "I'm really struggling with this decision" and the other person go, "Here's my honest opinion of that." (Brad: Yeah) And no no feelings are hurt if they're not taken. So ...

Brad Crowell  

Well, I'm glad to hear that Momentum Fest is booked if you you know if and when you listen to Monday's episode with her. She was actually undecided (Lesley: Yeah) if she was going to book it again. So happy to hear that they decided to move forward with it. I have had an incredible experience each time that we've gone and I know that you would, too. (Lesley: Yeah) So hope to see you there in person.

Lesley Logan  

Okay, so here's something I love out of all the things, I mean there's so many I'm going to be really honest. It was it was actually really difficult but she said, "It's okay not to know if you're done or not." So, obviously she was unsure of a good decision there but for her for Momentum Fest but this was in regards to her talking about selling her studios and like she told that amazing emotional story I think many people can relate to. And what it made me think of is you know one of the things that my therapist told me about regrets because I said, "You know my grandfather passed away so I kind of regret not calling him more often." You know and she said, "Well, you know the thing about the past is that at the moment it made, you made, this decision you made to not call him made sense." So the decision to not call him wasn't like like "blowing this guy off right now." No, I didn't call him all the time because he's kind of a Negative Nancy. (Lesley laughs) He was he was there's a lot of fear around at anytime I bring up something I was excited about he would just be like the fear monster ... and so I I know that it was self preservation at the time to not call him. It wasn't anything to do there. So, if you are undecided or not know if you're done or whatever it is, whatever decision you make, you don't have to worry about regretting later or looking back on going that was dumb because you're making the decision based off the information you have in that moment. And that's all the only way you can make a decision and then there will be times where you have to change a decision because new moments happen that go, (Brad: Yeah) "Whoa, holy cow. I can't have one foot on the mainland and one foot on an island." (Lesley laughs) You know, so anyways, that's what I really love that she shared that story. That's like, I think a lot of people can understand.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, well and you know, thanks for sharing that about your pops. You know also too I think it was it was we knew that it was coming but we also didn't know how soon it was coming, too. So you know, there's there's we you know, when you try to call more often towards the end of things and they don't always answer the phone. So you know, also what are you gonna do, right? One thing that I really enjoyed that she said was ... what what I found really amazing, actually was the inner dialogue, that concept of having an inner dialogue. This is not my MO. This is not how I usually do things. I don't actually have a conversation with myself. You know, I, I think through different topics, but I'm not usually asking myself questions in the way that it sounds to me like she does. Obviously, she does if you go back and listen to the episode, and she talked about when she's making a difficult decision, she would walk around the block alone, you know, she's she's obviously married has family, all the things. But she's like, you know, when I you know, for me to process something, for me to be able to ask these questions, I will take time for myself to think about it to actually process the thing. And I thought that was really amazing, because I think for me, it's I often make snap decisions, because I've often worked under a lot of stress under a lot of pressure. And, I don't actually have the time, you know, before or maybe that's just the story I was telling myself instead, what if, when I have a really huge decision coming up, I did take a walk around the block or I went for a bike ride or something that allowed me to ...

Lesley Logan  

Two things we can now do (Brad: step away) because this is the cold time in Vegas. And it's like beautiful out all time. (Brad: Yeah, yeah) And also like you can ride a bike in our neighborhood and not be hit by a car. So that's cool.

Brad Crowell  

My my friend for a long time when I was in LA when I first got there, I don't talk with him very often anymore because he moved away and life happened but his dad, once a year would go journey to the hilltop, right? That's a weird phrase. But he literally would go by himself off to some cabin on a mountain alone for a weekend. Just to think, just to be alone and like reevaluate, evaluate whatever, like look at his life and decide, "Is this something that I want to do?" He was a business owner as well. And he really wanted to invest in his community. And he was he was he made himself every year take time alone to go reflect.

Lesley Logan  

That's so cool. You do that when you go to Joshua Tree even though you're not alone, you spend a lot of time with yourself.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, exactly ... I mean, I'm also I am with friends. This is a little more like intentionally isolated, intentionally thinking about you know, life. So anyway, I I'm really enjoyed listening to her talk about her inner dialogue. I also had a good laugh about that, because I think that, that this is something that you, Lesley, you do pretty well. Or at least often. And ...

Lesley Logan  

Tell me more about my amazing self.

Brad Crowell  

Oh, yeah, yeah, well, I laugh a lot because she, I think Brian and I probably can relate to the conversation that you're having in your head. And then you just start talking to me as if I've been having the conversation with you. (Brad: Yeah) And I'm like, "I have no idea what you're ... what are we talking about here?" But but I but I anyway, I just thought that's really interesting. I wonder how I can work that into, you know, my routine, my life, to to set aside more time to have an inner dialogue to begin asking questions. And reflecting a little bit more. So

Lesley Logan  

You can start that with like a journal, you can just ask ... like, maybe if like sitting in down or walking and like just having a conversation with yourself feels weird. You could just write it.

Brad Crowell  

That's true. Yeah, a journal ... You know, I never been really good at journaling ...

Lesley Logan  

Except for when he did a five minute journal made a bet with himself.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, but that was that was cheating. I was writing half a sentence because they prompted you like the idea of actually journaling. I kind of stopped that after middle school. But But, you know, either way that it you know, if that's a better way for you to process information, that's a great thing that can happen. Otherwise, you could, like, you know, like Jessica was talking about taking a walk.

Lesley Logan  

FYI, though you can journal one word a day, you could also do gratitudes, you can just write a story of what happened that day. If you're like, "What the heck is journaling? I have been on a research because of the perfectionist." I am like, "How does one journal? What ist that?" (Brad: Sure) And, what I have discovered is there is a plethora of ways you can journal and you just have to pick one that you'll stick with because the reality is you'll probably won't notice how well it's helping you. Or it might not even help you unless you've been doing it for a bit of time. (Brad: A while) Yeah, so and that doesn't mean like you know, 21 days to make a habit. It just means like pick something like pick a notebook. And like tell yourself you're gonna open it every day. And then when that becomes really easy, then to by yourself, you're gonna write one word. And then when that becomes really easy, then write a sentence. And if you ever write more, it's extra credit. So that's a journaling situation for you.

Brad Crowell  

I love it. (Lesley: Okay.) All right. So finally, let's talk about those BE IT action items that we always dig into. What bold, executable intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your convo with Jessica Valant? Why don't you go first this week?

Lesley Logan  

Okay, so I love this. She talked about being open to getting information, because it will serve you when the opportunity comes. (Brad: Yeah) I think this is really cool because a lot of people think that like, "Some people are lucky and they're some unlucky." Nope. Remember, luck is where preparation meets opportunity. (Brad: 100%) So that's what and that means like the opportunity might be random but the preparation is very much within your control. And ...

Brad Crowell  

This is what she was specifically was talking about in the episode was she and her husband Brian had been talking about, you know, "We want to get a house. We want to get a house. We want to get a house." And they knew it was not the right time yet but she began to just hang out on Zillow, and surf Zillow and begin to kind of see patterns and learn about the way that it worked and you know begin to she was beginning to identify, "Oh, this is a good deal. Oh, this is not a good deal. Oh, there's a good thing here. This is not a good thing here." And that was because I think if I remember she said she spent like, a long time like more than a year just hanging out on Zillow and learning about stuff. Then when they saw something come across their plate. It wasn't frilly and pretty, but they knew this is a good deal.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah. And so this made me think of Tina Tang like, "Open to curiosity like following your curiosity." And what I loved about this is it can be as simple as just curating your Instagram feed with things that you want to be seen so if that's how you curate (Brad: Sure) that by the way if you intentionally go to certain accounts every day and you comment on their stuff, and then your Instagram feed will just start showing you that. So that's gonna be really helpful (Brad: Yup) if you can I mean there's just so many different things you can do about getting the information. It doesn't have to be like you don't have to go and study French, right? You but you can like ...

Brad Crowell  

It could be starting a Pinterest board.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, I love that idea. It could be following the French account that someday you want to that's a travel account that someday you want to go to and then one day someone's like, "Hey, I have an extra ticket," you'll be like, "Oh my God, I know exactly where I want to go." Like, so ...

Brad Crowell  

I think I think this is something that I've done inadvertently over the years particularly when it comes to travel because that's my thing that I love more than most things. And you know, I was watching a movie the other day and there was a background and I was like, "What the? That is not a set. That is a place. Where are they? That is amazing." And I looked it up and it's a it's a gardens in Singapore, and ... (Lesley: Cool, we're going) Oh, we are totally gonna go but I started to read about this and I left the tab up on my computer and so a couple days later came back around and I was looking at again and I'm like, "Man, how can we make this happen?" So you know it could just be curiosity begins the process (Lesley: Yeah) again, Tina Tang.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, but also um you know, what made me think of is like, "What you appreciate, appreciates?" that's not something I created that other people have said and so if you are just taking the time to like gather up information on something it's going to accrue interest and like either becomes ... it becomes something you do or something you get to go see, like it just gets on top of your mind. So then when the opportunity comes, you're aware of it. (Brad: Yeah) Right? And so this can be I mean, it's like anything you want in life, it does have to be a bit more on the first page of your browser not like the second and third for it to be something that you can pay attention to. So, I love that. I love that was something you can do it's free. (Brad: Yeah) And you can start today, I love action items that are like easy to implement right now.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, and I think you know, my my biggest takeaway from her BE IT action items was "Decide what you actually want." And this is actually really, it can be tied into our conversation from last week, where we were talking about poking our head in the down the pink hallway and like looking in the room and being like, "That's not the master suite. Close. That's not the master suite. Close," whatever. When you know what you want, it allows you to see all the things that are coming at you and be like, "That's super cool. That's not for me. That's super cool. Maybe that's for her or him or you know them," whatever it's but it's not you know that it's not for you. And when you decide what you actually want it, like, here's an amazing example. In our coaching group, we had someone come to us and say, you know, "I want to build a ... an online platform for people." And we're like, "Great, that sounds amazing. You know, we'll talk to you all about it, we'll help you through all the things." And then she called us later and said, "I just had this crazy opportunity come across my plate, where my my friend who runs a studio in town is going to move. And the rent at her place is like an amazing, (Lesley: Oh, yeah) it's an incredibly cheap rent. I know that this is like a steal." And she basically said, "I could just take over and I and then like, I would have a Pilates studio." You know, and the question was, from our perspective was, "Hey, look, that's incredible. That's an awesome deal. That's an incredible opportunity. But is that going to actually help you get to the membership that you wanted to build? Because when we were talking about what you want to go do, it had nothing to do with owning the studio." (Lesley: Yeah) You know, and so then we started talking about the pros and cons of that potential opportunity, compared to or in alignment with the decision that she had want, like what she actually wanted, right? So suddenly, you're looking at it through a new lens, if you didn't know what you wanted to do. Wow, that's, that is a crazy opportunity. But then so is the next one, then so is the next one, (Lesley: Yeah) and so is the next one, and it allows it could be, then suddenly, you're juggling 50 different things, and you're just maintaining it all. You're not actually excelling at any of them. And you know, you're not you're setting yourself up to really take one thing and grow it really well.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, I love that. You know, what came to my mind is like, there's the book, the half ... Oh, happy? No, no, that's not it. It'll come to me anyways, her name is Amy Spencer, she wrote a book, "Bright Side Up," it's not about seeing if the glass is half full or half empty. It's about seeing something in the glass and shooting the chapter that I quote all the freakin' time, because it's all about, it's called park or drive away. And the idea is that an idling car like she tells a story about how they're at this amazing outdoor restaurant. And they're having this brunch and everyone is just like, brunching up and it's like, you know, like in the movies, pre COVID. All the brunching and the client, the clinking, the laughter, it's like beautiful sun shining on everyone. And a car pulls up, and then it's idling. And it takes a while for people to hear the idling. But all of a sudden, one person hears it. And they're like, "Why is that car idling?" and then someone else another table hears it. And slowly over time, this entire cheery, excited brunch, energy has just turned anxious and nervous. And that the breath of the entire ... of the entire brunch, parties are being held, like, "What is happening?"

Brad Crowell  

Why is this car idling?

Lesley Logan  

"Why it's car idling?" I mean, like, depending on your life, you might be thinking a million different things. And then the car drove off. And literally every you could hear the whole restaurant exhale. And then all of it started up. So the idea is an idling car, like stresses everybody out, not just you. And (Brad: Sure) so if you decide what you want, then it's really easy for you to use a filter like Brad explain it. Also, just know that like you can't make a wrong decision for yourself. Because every single thing that you do is leading you to the next thing. So like, if you really do trust that the universe is conspiring for you, then you can't make a bad decision. It's not possible. You just have to make the one that you want. And not that you think other people will be excited for you to want.

Brad Crowell  

I think a good example of this in our life is the studio that we have here. And the the decision that we made not to have a home studio where people are coming in and out of our front door all the time. (Lesley: Yeah) When we first, we're moving here, that was absolutely the idea. And we got here and we realized a lot of our clients are virtual because they're in Los Angeles, and we have this, you know, income stream, we have all those clients as they are. Do we even want to begin finding new clients here in the city? And we decided, "No, we don't actually want to do that." And then when people come to us and say, "Hey, I live down the street. I'm looking for a Pilates instructor. You know, would you teach me," it is actually a lot easier for us to say, "Hey, thanks so much. That's incredible. No, we're not actually looking. We don't we're not looking for more clients, but you can join our online community instead." (Lesley: Or I send them to a three Pilates instructors ...) or where we can refer them out. Yeah, 100% and, and that, you know, doesn't seem like lost income to us anymore. When it may have, you know, before because we didn't know what we wanted,

Lesley Logan  

yeah, yeah, that's a great example. And I think, you know, it Look, I think it is easy in a vacuum to say, "Just decide what you want." But um, you know, I know that there's a lot of different things, there's a lot of different things to consider, especially when you have a partner or kids or anything like that. And I just keep thinking back to, like, if you can't make a wrong decision. And if you really, truly want the thing, it's going to make the people around you much more excited for you to help you have what you want, then for you to make sacrifices and want things for them instead of for you. Like, you're like, I just look, I just think back to, you know, I heard of different sacrifices my parents have made, and like, I hate that they did that for me. (Brad: Sure) Like they said, "Well, we want you to have this. So we did this instead." And I'm kind of like, "What would my life have been like, if they had done what they wanted to do?" You know, like, I don't know, (Brad: Yeah) who knows, like, everything happens the way it's supposed to. But what I keep thinking is, my goodness, I would probably have rather been with somebo... like been in a house where people were doing what inspired them and not what they thought they had to do. So anyways, just food for thought from a child of parents. (Brad and Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell  

I think we can all be a child of parents. (Lesley: Yeah.) I thinks that's a ...

Lesley Logan  

Yeah. (Brad: Yeah) Anyways, well, you know, I'm Lesley Logan.

Brad Crowell  

And, I'm Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan  

Thank you so much for joining us today. We are so grateful that you are here. And I really truly do love hearing how you use these tips talking points BE IT action items in your life. When you screenshot this podcast and you tag the @be_it_pod, you tag our guest and you share what those things are. It really does like make my day. I interrupt Brad in every important conversation ... "Look with this person is doing with this action item." And, so ...

Brad Crowell  

Yeah. It really does, light light our fire so you know, share, invite your friends to listen and join us in this community. (Lesley: Yeah) And, you know, as we mentioned before, we're we are on a mission to reach a hundred comments. So ...

Lesley Logan  

Hundred written reviews on Apple. (Brad: Yep. So help us out) And you are a part of that. And every single one you do when every time you tell someone about this podcast, it helps us grow and it is really freakin' cool. (Brad: Yeah) How fast we're growing and I I'm just so grateful for you. So thank you, and we will catch you on the next episode.

Brad Crowell  

Cheers.

Lesley Logan  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review, and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day.

Lesley Logan  

'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.

Brad Crowell  

It's written, produced, filmed and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan  

Kevin and Bel at Disenyo handle all of our audio editing and some social media content.

Brad Crowell  

Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan  

Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all video each week so you can.

Brad Crowell  

And the Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

Please welcome Jessica Valant, creator of Momentum Fest, former Pilates studio owner, and mom of two! Jessica and Lesley dive headfirst into knowing or not knowing when something is finished, leave other things unfinished, and the inner dialogue you have with yourself. After that they talk about priorities, dealing with the overwhelm, and deciding what you actually want.

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] .

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• Being reminded of your bravery
• Being unwilling to wait
• Planning one step at a time
• Going back to your "why"
• It's okay not to know if you're done or not
• Having an inner dialogue
• You can only have so many priorities
• Brain dumps

Episode References/Links:

• Jessica Valant's website
• Follow on Jessica IG
• Follow Grace Hurry on IG
• The Enneagram of Personality

Guest Bio:

Jessica graduated from Regis University in Denver with her Master’s Degree in Physical Therapy in 2000. She received her Pilates training in

2001 through Polestar Pilates and is a Nationally Certified Pilates Teacher and PMA approved continuing education provider.

She has worked with thousands of clients of different backgrounds, ages, injuries and abilities, to help them reach their ultimate health goals.

Jessica is recognized as a leader in the Pilates industry. She has a successful YouTube channel, membership site and blog. She has been named a top 10 finalist in the 2015 Pilates Anytime Next Instructor Contest and a Creator on the Rise by YouTube and has been featured in Pilates Style Magazine (including as a cover model in 2020), Shape, Buzzfeed, Yoga Journal and Thrillist. She teaches popular workshops and courses to other health care professionals and Pilates instructors and is considered an expert in the women's health arena.

Jessica and her husband, Brian, founded Momentum Fest, a three day Pilates and movement festival, in 2017 in order to create an inclusive, loving and fun place for all people to celebrate movement together.

She is married to her best friend and their days are spent in Denver wrangling two young kids, being in the sun, living their passion through work and drinking coffee.

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.

Resources

• Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!
• Lesley Logan website
• Be It Till You See It Podcast
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube
• Profitable Pilates

Social Media

• Instagram
• Facebook
• Tik Tok
• LinkedIn

Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan  

Hello, welcome back. I'm so excited you're here. I'm, I'm so excited for you. One of the things I love about this podcast is I get to meet lots of new people that I've never talked to, and really hear their story. And then another reason is that I get to talk to some of my friends and share their stories and also hear things about them that I probably didn't know, because I would just talk to them as a friend, I wouldn't actually go, "Hey, why do you do that? Why why do you ask yourself so many questions?" And that is something I got to do here today with our guests with who is Jessica Valant. Find her at Jessica Valant Pilates, everywhere and she is. First of all, she is such a beautiful human being inside and out. I am honored to be a friend of hers truly, you get to hear how we meet, or how we met, and where our friendship has grown too and also just where she is right now and where she used to be and for my moms this one is for you. She has so much advice for you. And if you're not a mom, still listen, because if you are a busy person like me with three dogs, and you feel like, "Hey, they they demand my attention too and I have so much going on." There's still a lot to take away from this. You're going to want to take notes while you're listening. She threw out some awesome questions asked herself and her strategies at the end just I can't even wait for Brad and I to dive into this podcast and I can't wait for you to dive into this podcast. So check out the show notes to her links to check her out. Follow her you're going to want too and also learn more about who she is, why she rocks and listen to this, listen to this interview and enjoy.

Lesley Logan  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Lesley Logan  

All right. Thank you so much for being here. Today, I have Jessica Valant. Who I can't... When I met her first of all, she was wearing a Fiona, Princess Fiona dress. I'm just gonna say that right now. She she actually texted me, which is something that I I really love that she did because at the time in my life, I was less good at texting random people to be friends with even though I wanted to be friends with them. And she was like, "Hey, let's meet for a drink." We were at a conference together and let's get to know each other. And so when I met her, she was dressed up as Princess Fiona. And she acted like we've known each other forever, which with social media, may we've followed each other for a long time. And, and then we've been we just ... like slowly became friends over time. And I know as adult, it's not easy to make friends. But you are someone Jessica, who I just am so grateful to call a friend and you inspire me every day. So welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast. Can you tell everyone a little bit about yourself?

Jessica Valant  

Yes, and thank you for that and for that reminder, actually, because sometimes I forget that I did that. And when you tell me I'm like, "I'm so proud of myself for doing that." Because I might have missed out on really one of the most important relationships professionally and personally, you and your family and Brad. But um, I think it's important to be reminded of times we were brave, because we forget. And right now in the world, actually, I forgotten that I can be brave. So that was a nice reminder. (Lesley: Oh) Thank you.

Lesley Logan  

You're so welcome. I, I, you're right, I think we do forget if we remember more times we made mistakes. Then we remember like we were brave, probably many more times than that.

Lesley Logan  

Right? And what's the worst thing that would have happened that you said, "No, I'm sorry. I'm busy. I can't but thanks so much." Like that's the worst thing that might have happened, right? (Lesley: Right) But yeah, I'm Jessica. I have been a Pilates teacher and physical therapist for a little over 20 years and I live in Denver now. I have two kids, eight year old, three year old. I'm married. I have a couple businesses and and then I have a whole journey that has brought me here and that's me. That's what I do.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, well, y'all. I can't believe your kids are eight and three because I mean, like, (Jessica: I knew you when I was pregnant with both of them. I know.) (Jessica laughs) Yeah. Like I know. And when and you also put together, y'all when I say an event, like a massive event with a newborn. Like when you DM me and said, "Hey," we were in a group DM and you're like, "Hey, y'all, I think I'm gonna do this like, festival like thing." And you had just had your son I was like, as someone who put on retreats, I was like, "Wow, you go girl," like, I don't know how you did that. But I want like, let's talk about that. And we can talk about other things in your life too. Like, what prompted you to go now is the time to make this thing happen?

Lesley Logan  

I, sometimes I really don't know. But um, I so he was our second, so I think that's something to keep in mind for anyone planning something I kind of, I kind of knew a little bit what we were getting into, you know, having a second one. So that helped a little bit. So I remember very distinctly, I was pregnant with him and we're talking very pregnant, like eight months pregnant, and walking the lake, beautiful day here in Denver. And my husband and I have been throwing around this idea about this possible festival for years. And we had recently just that summer moved back to Denver. So I was probably feeling a little bit, um wanting something, you know, how do I create something? We're in the city that we know, but we haven't been here for a long time. And I want to create something that's maybe for me, I was probably feeling that a little bit. But I was literally walking around the lake and it hit me, well, in our industry was also in a tough time, there was a (Lesley: Yeah) lot of infighting. And it was hard for me to see that. And like, "I don't want that we need community and so how can we do that?" And it really hit me. I'm like, "I think now's the time." And I call I called him on that walk and I said, "I think now's the time that we do it." And I don't know, we just started meeting, we literally just moved into our house, we didn't have Wi-Fi for months. So we were meeting at a local college library, he and I while our older daughter was in preschool, we would meet in the afternoon and use their Wi-Fi in the conference rooms and just talk. And that's when we decided first that we needed to have teachers. And so I reached out to you and a few people like, well, I know a few people. And as soon as you guys said yes, like, "Okay, I think we need a venue. I think we knew the name." And literally I went in the first stages of labor at the library. Like that's how we were yes. I'm like, (Lesley: Oh my God) I think the baby's coming in the next two days and he did. And so we just, I don't know, like, I still can't put my finger on why that felt like the right time. Except that I knew if we didn't, it really just hit me. If we don't do it now, we probably won't. And I think somebody else might and how am I going to feel if somebody else does it, instead. Like how would I feel? I'm like, "I think I want to do it. I think we shouldn't be the ones to try this." And that's what made us do it.

Lesley Logan  

Okay, there's so much to unpack there that I think people can see themselves in. So y'all. I love that you were like, "We don't have Wi-Fi." So instead of going, "Well, I'll wait till we have our internet here." You're like, which, by the way waiting for the internet people to come. It's like, "Okay, we'll be there in three weeks between 9am and 12pm." And it's like, right. And so you're like, we're just you you took messy action, you we... you did what you could and then you, I love that you went with the teachers first because I think like that was I got to be one of them. And as we were so excited, I'm sure that that really helped. It's like instead of going, planning this whole thing and then going, "Okay, well anybody want to teach at it," you're like, "Well, let me just see if I can get people to do this." And so, I love that it's it's, you did it one step at a time. And I also love the question. If you, how would you feel if someone else did it? I do like that question because sometimes I asked myself like, "Well, what's the worst case? What's the worst thing that can happen?" (Jessica: Yup) But I love that second question. If like, "How would I feel, if someone did it before me?" Oh, that's so good. So this I want to talk about it, y'all. This is her events called Momentum Fest and it's actually not just for Pilates teachers. It's for like, anybody who loves movement, and it's also not even just Pilates. So, um, so you you truly went and did something so unique that's not really been done before. Like, I don't I don't think it's ever done before. Now that it's in its fourth year, fifth year, (Jessica: fourth) fourth year. How do you and maybe you haven't even talked about this yet or thought about but like, how do you figure out like, what's the next thing, right? Because sometimes I think the first one is the easier one ...

Lesley Logan  

Right, exactly and I agree. No expectations. First one was really just proof of concept. Like each teacher that texted me, "Yes," I was shocked. Like, Brian, that's my husband, like, "Brian, they said yes." Like, "They're gonna come." I mean, and Grace Hurry is someone who I hadn't even known professionally at all just through social media. And I'm like, "She's a great teacher. I'll just reach out." I'm like, "Brian, she's coming from the UK." I mean, so that's first off for people wanting to do something hard. Don't assume people will say, "No", they might, but people might shock you. (Lesley: Yeah) I mean, they're, it's it's truly amazing. So when you all said, "Yes." We knew there was a possibility so you're exactly right. First year was just proof of concepts. You know, we knew, we didn't want to take loans. Yes, some specific things in mind, boundaries for ourselves. I mean, this was just me and my husband. So we weren't going to put our family in financial stress. We had to figure it around our other businesses. So we really had boundaries and numbers in mind, how many people do we need to hit, you know, at least to break even? And exactly the next thing was just oh, this was proof of concept cool. The second year, could we possibly either make some money, grow the business and bring in more exhibitors like I really wanted to be able to promote other teachers, I think we doubled the amount of teachers the next year for exposure for more teachers. And then we did have some grand plans in mind to keep growing and then 2020 hit and our entire event was canceled. And so I think that's one lesson that yes, we had big plans in mind on what might be next and then everything changed. And so now we're changing goals, changing boundaries, changing all of it. And it really is sitting and thinking, "Okay, is this the goals we set? Are they still realistic?" The vision we had just even the goal as a business, does that still make sense or not in the current world, because we have different things we maybe want to promote now and Pilates has changed, the industry has changed. So it's definitely a day to day right now, which is a struggle for me. I'm a planner, like, "I want to plan things, I want to know, I work so well within that." (Lesley: Yeah.) And so to try to plan something in a new unplannable world is not easy for me whatsoever. But I think if you just go back to your why, and that was it was kind of that question again with this year? Do we keep it or do we not? And it was, "How would I feel if we didn't," and I just knew I wouldn't feel right. Like that is really what it comes came down to is, I will not feel right in my soul if we don't have an event this year, because I feel like people need it. I need it. We need a full circle moment. And sort of it was it just came down to them.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, that makes me think of I could be wrong. But I swear I was on a run years ago, and I heard Brené Brown on a podcast talking about how she hates the bumper sticker. Like, "What would you do if you didn't think you could fail?" (Jessica: Oh yeah) she sle... and she said like, "What would you do even if you could like, even if you did?" (Jessica: Yeah) and I feel like with you, you're like, you've just it keeps going back to like, "I ju... I'm not done yet." (Jessica: Yeah) Like, "This isn't done yet."

Jessica Valant  

That's exactly what it is. I just am like, "We're not done yet." And we might be and at some point with anything in life, like when I sold my studios, that was a hard place to get to. Also I didn't know I was done yet until it got to a point. I'm like, "One past done. Oops, (Lesley: Yeah) I missed the turn off like ... past done." And I just kind of woke up and knew that, but I think sometimes we don't and it's okay not to know if you're done or not. I just listened to a podcast the other day and actually, it might have been Brené Brown ... (Lesley: She's so good) I know ...

Lesley Logan  

We can probably just give it to her and even if she's not, she'll just actually tell us who it wasn't her. Because I heard her on a podcast, people kept saying that this quote was from her. And she's like, "Actually, this is Sonya Renee Taylor." And I was like, "She's amazing." (Jessica: Yeah) So, we attributed to her, she'll let us know. (Lesley laughs)

Lesley Logan  

But it was, it's okay to leave things unfinished. And again, for my planning personality, like, "No, it's not, (Jessica laughs) I can't leave it anything unfinished." But I thought about that a lot. That I think that's some grace, we need to give ourselves that it is okay. And I don't feel that with the event at all like, I love where we are right now. But just other things in life that's a good lesson for me to realize, you know what it is okay? If you suddenly realize a project you're doing, a new business relationship you're in if you suddenly realize, "Gosh, this really isn't right for me." I don't think we have to feel like we have to finish it out for the next year. I mean, you can pivot you you're allowed to change your mind. You're allowed to do that.

Lesley Logan  

I I love this because I think like you say, as a planner, I think a lot of people don't want to leave things unfinished, because there's like, well, then it's not perfect. Like, "I didn't do it 'right'", in air quotes, you know, and you know, we... let's I want to talk about your your studios, because I think that a lot of people can resonate, like with ending something. For me, you know, I really struggled, going... before 2020 started, I was struggling with like, "I have the studio, I teach all these people, I love them so much." But I really, really and being called to OPC, I'm really called to expand this and 10x and bring in more people and with a focus of just connecting and community and not a not and that's also probably why we're really good friends, it's the same thing with Momentum Fest. It's like, how do we get people who aren't teachers to also connect and have community and not be perfect and not be like is this exercise, right? And I struggled because I'm like, well, I couldn't see how I ended the studio. (Jessica: Yeah) I couldn't see that and when and when and so I just kept going, "Gosh, I wish I had time, wish I had time." And so when COVID hit, I was like, "So next time we wish were more specific." We're like, ... "I wish I had time and a plan." (Lesley laughs)

Jessica Valant  

And maybe that coffee shops were still open, maybe ...

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, and maybe, and maybe that my husband and I are in a one, like a studio apartment working from home together. But, um, I, I, because of COVID I left, you know, that whole studio unfin... like the exit was very unfinished. And it was, it was not how I first saw it happening. And what was a blessing was I had the excuse, like, "Well, the pandemic kind of made me do it." And what I realized is, "Actually, like, I don't need that excuse," like that might work as like, on the surface, might sound really good to other people, and they can understand that. But I also if there wasn't one, I don't think I need that." 

Lesley Logan  

And so, you know, when you had, so you had two studios in Hawaii, so before Denver before you lived in Hawaii. You know, when you started those, what was the vision? And then how did you know when you were like beyond the exit?

Lesley Logan  

Um, I think it was just talking to someone about this yesterday, I think one thing is, in our industry, at least, the pinnacle is, or at least was back 10 years ago, to own your own studios. I mean, that was in Pilates, especially in physical therapy the same, you own your own clinic and studios, and then you've reached it. And that's all I'm like, "That's it. I'm here, we have two, we have a staff of 19. This is amazing." And so we ended up leaving Hawaii, which I never thought we'd do either, like one of my biggest lessons in life now is, "Never say never." Because you you just I never thought I'd own my own business like I never wanted to, you just never know. So we left Hawaii and so I was managing them from afar. And I just was feeling that anxiety every day. I mean, I was looking at the schedule and counting every highlighting are we making our numbers, we're doing this, it had become very anxiety riddle to me instead of the part I love, which is the community and all of that. And I remember the moment, but I still never thought I would sell whatsoever. But the moment for me, like there was a very clear moment. My husband was out of town so I was with our one year old daughter on my own. And she was at my feet wanting to be held and she was crying to be held but I had to put her down because I got a call from Hawaii from one of my instructors who was locked out of the class and she had a full class in the hall trying to get into she was locked out because the key was inside, the previous instructor had locked the key in the door. So they needed me. I mean, both needed me they needed me desperately, and there was nothing I could do. And my daughter was crying, my feet needed me desperately. And it just hit me, I can't do both well, I just can't, some people can but I can't. And and that was what kind of did it was I think I need to let something though. And I knew myself and one of my top priorities was I didn't want to let her go. Like I (Lesley: Yeah) thought I'd be a mom who did full time childcare, I always thought that and then she came and I'm like, "No, I want to be home." I want to at least have the option to be home. And so that was whenever I feel like I'm not doing well enough or I need to make a decision, I kind of have that touchstone I come back to because that for me is what it is, is can I give the kids the time they need and I couldn't give her the time she needed. And I was going crazy. And so that meant it was time to let someone else do something really good with the studios because they were suffering. Everybody was suffering because I couldn't let something go. So, man, once I did and handed that key over, I never looked back.

Lesley Logan  

Wow! So what what keeps coming up is like you ask yourself really good questions. Do you do this in a journal? Do you do this, um like it just out loud on like, you wanna walk around like, where does this question? Are you just someone who asked good questions.

Jessica Valant  

So, have you done any studying of the enneagram at all?

Lesley Logan  

I get a little bit and I need to figure out what I am because I hear too much about it.

Lesley Logan  

So I decided when COVID when all of this started, and I was in the anxiety place and like, "I have to get myself out of it because I need to serve people better." So, and I've been in therapy a long time ago that served me really well. And I'm like, "This, I need to learn more about myself." And like ... enneagram stuff's interesting to me anyway, so I dove into it. And I'm almost positive. I'm a six. And one of the biggest things about the six is we have a constant internal dialogue. And I could never put my finger on what that was called. I just assumed everybody does. But literally they describe it as the board meeting going on in your head at all times. So I kind of do have that like, I'm the CEO and then I have another voice who's doing another voice. And it's constantly talking which can be very hmm sometimes but also it does. It helps me lay things out and ask myself, "Why I'm doing something? What my motivation is? What are my goals?" and I think the therapy I went through 20 years ago helped with that too. I just I don't want to go back to that place I was. So for me, it's important to talk it out. So I usually do just talk it out in my head, I'll go on a long walk and think it through, really figure out why I'm trying to make a decision or not make a decision. I don't always do that well, but ...

Lesley Logan  

That's a good question, "Why am I not trying to make a decision?" I feel like a lot of people can put that on their like, questions list. If you're not a six, and you need, (Jessica: Yeah) you need ... need a list and there's about four good ones in here. I'm gonna, I'm gonna take it, so by the time Brad, and I do the recap, I can say, cuz maybe that's what's going on. Because I totally feel like I have got a whole conversation happening then I got to talk to Brad. He's like, "I don't even know where ... like, where are we starting in this conversation?" (Lesley laughs)

Jessica Valant  

Brian says that, too! He's like, "Are you really talking to yourself?" Like, constantly in my head.

Lesley Logan  

Yes. Yeah. And so when I actually asked you a question out loud, I just assumed you were with me on that whole dialogue that I just had (Lesley laughs)

Jessica Valant  

Exactly, like, "Didn't you hear all of that? I've already made the decision for us, because I've been thinking about it for a week." (Lesley: Yeah) Like, do you not know? (Jessica laughs)

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, yeah, I definitely thought it was more my aquarian, but maybe it's, maybe it's my enneagram (Jessica: Right) number. So I'll have to, have to dive into that. So okay. Um, now you've two kids. And you, being in Denver, you now work from home, you have an online Pilates platform, you have this festival. What, when you work when you work, when you work for yourself and you're like, at home and you've got kids. I feel like it could, I feel like as an outsider looking in, I wonder, how do you structure a day, because, you know, if there's a child who's like, under five, they're not in school, they're like asking you for things while you might be wanting to like, do the thing for yourself. So for the moms listen to this, like, how are you structuring a day?

Jessica Valant  

I, and right now, it's like all bets are off since March of 2020 because then the kids were suddenly home. So I will be honest, that it is. It's just I'm hoping in the fall to have more structure because I do not have enough at all. So I think if you don't have structure, whether it's kids or pets, or you know, you're taking care of elderly parents, whatever it is, it is okay if you don't have structure, because sometimes we just can't. So for me, like when the structure itself went out the window, again, I had to kind of go back to what are my main goals because like you, I have an online community, I really want to make sure I'm serving them. So I realized, okay, if I need to not be getting new clients, right now, in order to use my small amount of time to take care of my current community, that will be my goal. So I kind of made sure I knew my top top things, you know, that needed to be done, so that I wasn't spinning my wheels all over the place. That helped me a little bit. And then for the days, I try, so if you do have, our kids are both in school, like two days a week. So those are the days I do zoom calls, I do my filming the things that I absolutely cannot be interrupted, I will block and batch on those days if I can, as much as I can. And then when I have them, I try really hard not to do both. But it's not because they don't I think kids should see you're working. I mean, my kids absolutely know what I do. They're a part of it. Everyone who's a part of my life knows their at Momentum Fest in my videos half the time, like they know what mom does, and that I love it. But I don't do a good enough job at either if I'm trying to watch them and do social media on my phone, like it just doesn't work. I'm not serving anybody. So that's one boundary I try hard to have in place, if I'm with them. If it's mom time, like when school is over, or whatever, then that's what it is. And then they know if it's work time, okay, it's work time, either my husband's home, or a lot of times, it's just after they go to bed at night. And when I'm up till midnight a lot. I don't love it, but it is what it is right now. So that's the that's the few ways I try to structure. It's not always perfect.

Lesley Logan  

Well, thank you for the honesty. And I think that that's important and it's true, like right now and tell kids are back in school, the normal amount of hours that they used to be, it's just really hard. But also, you know, you went back to what your top priorities are. And I think that there's a blessing and then this disguise of unplanned and not enough boundaries, it's that you can only have so many priorities. And so you're only able to do those, you're not actually able to get distracted by other things, which is probab... it's actually a good thing because I think too many people are like, "Oh, I'm going to do this social media thing over here. And I'm also going to plan this thing over here" and you're like, "No, I'm actually going to be doing these things right now and that's it (Jessica: Yeah) and I'll be okay with that." (Jessica: Yeah)

Jessica Valant  

And I think it's okay to drop like I do grocery order only. And I refuse to feel bad about it because that's something I had to drop. Like, I don't feel like schlepping the kids. If I have that either. One if the kids aren't here I have, I'm working and that's it. I'm not cleaning the house. I'm not ordering groceries, like, I have to use the time for work. And if I do have them, I don't really like to go to the grocery store at all. So I think unloading the things that you can unload is really good. And then what I try to do is always, like my little shame voices will come out at night, like after the kids go to sleep. It's "Oh, I didn't do enough today. I snapped at them, then I wasn't a good enough, this, I wasn't good enough that" and so I try to remember that and just do, like, whatever during the day is going to help me at night feel like, "You know what I did my best to serve people today." That helps me and I have found it's when I can kind of separate them and just not do them at the same time. I'm either in mom mode, or I'm in work mode. And if I didn't get something done, it's okay - but I, at least, was present for those people in those moments.

Lesley Logan  

So you, we had another guest here on the podcast, her name is Amy Ledin, she's a friend of mine, I got to introduce you two actually, you... she has five kids. So and she runs an online business and she actually talked about how at night those voices are the ones that are like, telling you like, "You're didn't do this right, you didn't this right, you didn't do this right." And that's actually how she has this thing called DAC, how she actually plans her next day. Her goals for the day are to like if she's like, "Oh, I wasn't present enough as a mom today." (Jessica: Yeah) She's like, "Okay, so intentionally, like, I'm gonna spend 15 minutes with each kid just doing whatever they want to do," right? And so she uses those, like shaming voices to actually, like, dictate how she's going to show up the next day. Because they're just the things that we wish we'd already been doing we hadn't, we promised ourselves we would have done.

Jessica Valant  

Yeah, exactly. And I think the other thing, I think that's perfect. And the other thing that helps me, and maybe it's because of that constant voice in my head, I will also start to be over..., it just happened this morning, overwhelmed with what I think or how many things I have to do, like, "Oh my gosh, there's so many." So I will just sit down immediately, or the next chance I have and I write them all out like, so here it is, I write them all out and get a brain dump from Marie Forleo calls it a "brain dump," and I dump them all out of my brain and then I can move on. It's amazing to just get them down on paper, be like, "Okay, now I can prioritize them." Or if I do, you know, the kids are happily playing for 20 minutes, I'll look at my list, "I'm like, great, I can get that done, I can check that off, I can check that off." And that helps me a lot.

Lesley Logan  

So I'm my my therapist, who is also a somatic leadership coach. So it's kind of nice, because sometimes it's actual therapy. And sometimes it's like helping me as a leader, I'm like, "Thank ... I'm glad you're both because I don't have time for more appointments." (Jessica laughs) But she talks about when you're overwhelmed, she's like, she has me write down when I'm overwhelmed all the things just like you do. And then she's like circle, the ones that are actually like a mental overwhelm. Because then we can talk about that separate because a lot of a lot of us have a pattern that like when something is happening, good or bad. We have a pattern in our brain that we go and do that we go through this like overwhelm rehearsal like a loop. And she's like, "If it's serving you, then there's that's something different. But if it's not serving you, then it's like, we have to redefine that pattern." We have to like I said, the new pathway in your brain.

Jessica Valant  

Yeah, know for sure. And I think for me, the pathway is I'm not doing enough. I'm not good enough. I'm not doing enough versus you're right. I could probably redefine it as maybe a lesson like, "Oh, I've overextended myself, okay, I'll learn from it." Or sometimes I write it down like, "That's not really that long, Jesscia," like ... (Jessica laughs) "You could get that done in an afternoon if you just buckled down."

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, I do the same thing too. I put some things off and I let them like, like, linger in my head is like something I have to do. It's I don't know why I do it to myself. But it's like, it's a pattern. And then I sit down and do it. If it's an interrupted, like, I can write a newsletter in 15 minutes. Like, this is not hard. Why did I say like, "Oh, I have to do that. I don't have enough time for this." It's like no, if you just turn your phone over and (Jessica: Yeah ...) Yeah, (Jessica: ... exactly.) So, what are you excited about right now? Like, what are you looking forward towards? Or what do you what's on your brain of like, because you're such a creator. What are you working on?

Lesley Logan  

I'm excited for summer, to be honest, like be in Denver. I'm really excited for summer for a little bit of hope. Like, that's what I feel right now is a little weight off my shoulders, which feels really good and then really Momentum Fest. I mean, we're on like the five week countdown. (Lesley: Aahhh) So, ... like seeing everyone's excitement and realizing that I can that I can be a part of that, you know, instead of being the creator of it, I'm like, "I just want to be a part of it." I mean, I think that's where Momentum Fest comes from is, I it was what I always wanted as a teacher and as a student. So I just love being a part of it like I, I just love being able to lift people up and bring people together. And so yeah, being a part of it and having people excited now that it's coming, that's what I'm really excited about, to give some hugs actually ...

Lesley Logan  

100%. And I think, you know, during during the pandemic, there was a window, where my friend got to have a very small outdoor wedding. And we were, I mean, Brad and I work from home, were essentially quarantining all the time. But we like we're very intentional for two weeks, like even my brother came to walk the dogs, we're in our office, because he goes out into the world and so we could go to this wedding. You know, everyone was wearing masks outside anyways, but we wanted to make sure that everyone could feel safe. No one wanted to be the wedding that caused an outbreak. And I didn't know how much I needed something to look forward to until I got there. And I did not cry at weddings, I was in like, tears at this woman's wedding. And what I when I think about Momentum Fest this year, is that like, it is something that so many people needed to look forward to like, it's almost like, like a lighthouse. You know, like we're all on the ship, we've been at sea for a long time and there's this lighthouse of hope, and of what can be after all of this. And so, I mean, I have so much like love and adoration for you because it's not easy to... you don't have all the answers. And you are one of very few people are like, "Okay, I'm gonna do this" during a time where there's a lot of unknowns and that's a lot. And I'm glad to hear that you are taking the time to enjoy the excitement around it to.

Jessica Valant  

I think I'm just there ... (Lesley laughs) because you're right, it's been a lot of, "I don't know, I don't know," but really seeing everybody's support and excitement. Like, "Wow!" it's really, it's really good. And yeah, if I get some hugs out of it, I'll tell you what, (Lesley: Yeah) that'll make my year.

Lesley Logan  

Oh, Brad and I will be the first. We're gettin' there early. Okay, Jessica, now that everyone's in love with you. And I'm sure so many women with children or lots of dogs like me are like, "Oh, thank goodness, I'm not the only one." Where can they find you, follow you? Where can they connect with you?

Lesley Logan  

I am @jessicavalantpilates everywhere. So, YouTube is a great place to go. If you want to find free workouts. I do a lot with women's health. So, anyone prenatal, postpartum prolapse, hysterectomy, you'll find a lot of resources if you need it. And then I have a website with a lot of resources and Instagram is always a great place, DM me, email me. I'm all over the place.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, we didn't even get into all of the women's health stuff. We'll have to have you back because I think, you know, one of the things I want to get into with this podcast is like, "How our health can really keep us from be it till we see it." So well, we'll have to dive into that um more with you for sure. Okay, so I always ask everyone this question, because it's so nice to be inspired. It's so ni... I mean, you also gave some awesome questions and strategies already, but just in case someone is like skip to the end. And they're like, "Tell me how to Be It Till I See It?" What, what are some strategies that they can do right now that that you would think of for be it till they see it?

Jessica Valant  

I think one is to just decide what you actually want and you don't have to put definitions on it or anything like that. And it can be so out there, I mean, don't limit yourself. But don't like don't see someone on Instagram that you think is awesome. And be like, "I want to do that" without asking yourself, "Oh, do I actually like fashion?" Like I actually that happens to me, I see fashion bloggers and I'm like, "That looks so awesome. I want to be with her." Well, I don't even know anything. I don't like fashion. What would I want to do that. So first is ask yourself truly and be honest and own it and be excited about it. Like what lights a fire under you? What is your dream about what you love, and stay in that lane for now and don't limit your dreams on that. But don't try to be somebody you're not just because you think you should definitely decide what you want ... For me, it's getting out there. Like one, this is so funny when I was thinking about this podcast this week. Zillow and owning a house is one example I have, so we bought the house we're in a year ago actually in the middle of all of this craziness. But for a year prior maybe two years prior, I had really wanted a house for our family like a house. We were in a walk up with a rooftop and stuff but no yard. I'm like, "I want a house. I want a house" and I just didn't see how it whatever happened in our neighborhood and everything going on. But I would lurk Zillow, and I'm like, "I'm just gonna get on here and I'm gonna look at houses and save them." And I knew that just by learning like about houses and what house was going on the market fast and what wasn't like that information is going to help me I don't know how, I have no idea how, I don't know how we're gonna buy a house here. I don't know how that's gonna work. I don't know how this is gonna help me but it is. And then truly when we came to look at this house, all of that helped because the house didn't show great, but we knew it was a great buy in this neighborhood that it was rare to find. And it's been a dream house for us and our family. And so that's one thing is like, even if you don't know how something's going to happen, if you know what you want, and you know what your passions are, just start either following things on social media or getting on Zillow, or doing Pinterest boards about your dream office space, or finding YouTube fitness folks that you love and just follow it and see how they do things that you like, or don't just be open to getting information because it will serve you when the opportunity comes like prepare yourself so that you're ready when the opportunity comes because it will you just don't know how or when.

Lesley Logan  

Oh, I have chills and I I can't wait to dive into this conversation with Brad because he's gonna have so much to say about that because we have a very similar story like the "How" is for us we moved a year ago as well. The "How" is and like couldn't figure out the "How" but so, y'all, I really hope you take those two tips and use them and what I'd love for you to do is screenshot this podcast, write your takeaway tag @jessicavalantpilates, tag the @be_it_pod. Let us know so we can cheer for you, root you on and until next time, Be It Till You See It.

Lesley Logan  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And, follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!

Lesley Logan  

'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.

Brad Crowell  

It's written, produced, filmed and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan  

Kevin and Bel at Disenyo handle all of our audio editing and some social media content.

Brad Crowell  

Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan  

Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all the video each week so you can.

Brad Crowell  

And the Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

Be It Till You See It does not mean overthink it, micromanage it, debate whether or not you're able of doing it and then taking action... Today Brad & Lesley recap the last episode's convo with Renee Dick. They cover acting now, thinking later, the pink hallway, and much more.

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] .

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• Brad's cactus obsession
• Act now, think later
• Living vs not living in your purpose
• Finding your purpose
• It may be easier to know what your purpose is NOT
• Open all the doors in the hallway and then decide

Episode References/Links:

• The Third Door by Alex Banayan

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.

Resources

• Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!
• Lesley Logan website
• Be It Till You See It Podcast
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube
• Profitable Pilates

Social Media

• Instagram
• Facebook
• Tik Tok
• LinkedIn

Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Lesley Logan  

Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co hosts in life, Brad and I are going to dig into the hilarious convo I had with Renee Dick in our last episode.

Brad Crowell  

It was hilarious. (Lesley: It was...) I literally laughed out loud.

Lesley Logan  

She's so funny. If you haven't yet listened to interview, feel free to pause this now, go back and listen to that one and then come back and join us. So you know, because it was so funny I'm going to say definitely do that this time.

Brad Crowell  

Oh, yeah, (Lesley: But then...) you should listen to it, (Lesley: Yeah) if you haven't.

Lesley Logan  

Oh, yeah, I think I think everything will make a lot more sense. She's just had so many gems. So anyways, that happened on Monday, Renee's episode came out, but this whole week has been week one of the #100withme challenge and I'm so freakin' stoked. It is fire. I mean, every time we do this challenge, it's always a lot of fun. But this particular one we have over 200 and I think it's like 215 people who've signed up, and they're epic. And they're all focusing so much on them, because the theme is "Me, Myself and I" and on habits and you know, we hit the day one on Sunday with like, "Aahhh" just like so much goodness. (Brad: Wait, what?) "Aahhh" (Brad and Lesley laughs) And it was so fun. It was our anniversary and some people who were also celebrating our anniversary, were there, people who were visiting Italy joined us on their vacation. (Brad: Yeah) It was just really cool ...

Brad Crowell  

Love that that's even an option!

Lesley Logan  

I know, I know me too. So you know we had so many but it's been it's week one and this is the fun week this is where there's a lot of excitement and motivation but this is also where I'm I'm working on troubleshooting with them what may or may not be working and how they create habits and so (Brad: Totally) this is my favorite part. And then, you know, it's what we, it's all the stuff that we're really proud of at OPC, the community and the support. So anyways, I just had to share that's what I'm excited about right now.

Brad Crowell  

Right now...

Lesley Logan  

Right now. (Brad laughs) Anyways ...

Brad Crowell  

Well, it is really it's a fun group. We have obviously we have more people in the challenge this time than we ever have which meant we had more people live in class than we've ever had and that was also really fun. Lots of dogs and you know babies and people in the background and all the things because I watch it while I'm you know making sure everything's happening right. And some fun questions at the end and great conversations during the hang so and then we have a, the Facebook group where everybody is on fire. It's like really cool. People (Lesley: Even though...) excited introducing themselves and meeting other people.

Lesley Logan  

Oh yeah, they're supporting each other, which is exactly what the group is for. Even though day day two, they didn't have access to that group it was (Brad laughs) but I you know, it was so crazy because like, of course people thought this is this who are our audiences. I'm sure this is you. If Facebook wasn't working, and we'd always people email us going, "My Facebook was hacked. I'm so sorry. I'm trying to figure it out, so I can't get back in" and we're like, "Nope, nope, not your problem. Not your fault." (Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, (Lesley: So...) everybody was down.

Lesley Logan  

I know. So anyways, even with that little hiccup, it's still a fiery group, and it is just so freakin' awesome. (Brad: Yeah) Anyways, um, Brad, did anyone send us a question?

Brad Crowell  

We did? Somebody apparently wanted me to talk more about cactuses because I'm so excited about them. (Brad laughs)

Lesley Logan  

Yeah. So, what is your favorite cactus?

Brad Crowell  

Well, okay, so I just wanted to say we moved here with no cactuses. (Lesley: Correct) I think, I think maybe we had one fake cactus that you brought that was sitting on the shelf forever. (Lesley laughs) Yeah, that was the only cactus we moved here with and today I ...

Lesley Logan  

... a fake cactus. (Brad: Yeah. It was a fake) I put it in a pot. (Brad and Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell  

Today, I think that between cactus and succulents. I don't know we have like 50 or 75 of them now, I'm like, clearly, I found something that that I should stop spending money on. (Brad laughs) But I really am excited we have ... I'm making the cactus garden that would never happen in real life, because it's cactuses from all over the world and in different climates and environments that need different types of watering and all the things ...

Lesley Logan  

He likes to make things difficult.

Brad Crowell  

I do not. (Lesley: Okay ...) I like to make things beautiful.

Lesley Logan  

But also, we have now been to many cactus gardens that around here.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, we've been visiting cactus garden.

Lesley Logan  

And I think we may be in over our head. I'm just gonna say it here. I haven't said this to Brad. Some of these cactuses are really huge and they have lots of babies and they're not years old and our agave is having so many babies. We're about to like just spread the babies around the garden. And ...

Brad Crowell  

Well, that's why we have 50 or 75 because the agave have multiplied like like pumpkins, like it's hilarious.

Lesley Logan  

So, the ones it looks like boobs, what are those ones called, the booby one? (Brad: The barrel cactus.) Yes (Brad: Yeah) Yes, we have these barrel cactuses and I have been loving them since he moved to Las Vegas. But they come very small at the store like depressingly small and but all the small ones I've seen around the neighborhood seem like they're dying. And but the big ones are just so big and they're ... they're they're like frickin' fortunes. Right? In a cactus, and we had this opportunity to like, say yes to four. And he mentioned he's like, "Oh, yeah, it's like a barrel cactus like little babies on it." And I said, "Okay, that sounds so great." And then I came home after house shopping with my dad and (Brad laughs) these barrels are the size of boulders.

Brad Crowell  

They come up to your knees. (Lesley: Yeah) So like, and and I mean, probably 30 or 40 years old and our our guy brought us four of them. They're huge. It's amazing. I definitely love those. I think to be honest, my favorite, is the coral cactus. (Lesley: Really?) I love it. I just think it's crazy. I think it looks like it belongs underwater. And I want it to be 16 inches wide because that's what it apparently can grow to. There has been some debate on if you are allowed to say "cactuses" or if you're supposed to say "cacti." So for me, I looked it up, I just want to put this out there that apparently both are okay. Now, we can have that argument, slash conversations slash I'm just gonna say cactuses anyway...

Lesley Logan  

So you say cactuses or you say cacti.

Brad Crowell  

 I kind of use them interchangeably but it ... cactuses seems to roll off the tongue a little easier.

Lesley Logan  

I agree. I think cacti feels like it feels like I should be in the lab. But you know what's really funny is we had a massive debate in our own company because I had Be It Till You See It with the apostrophe and one l. And it is not an apostrophe and one L

Brad Crowell  

It's not until (Lesley: it's not...) it's it's with the apostrophe t i l. It's actually t i l l is actually a word.

Lesley Logan  

If the own word (Brad: Who knew) and it's not a shortened. It's not like y'all, it's just, it's just it's own thing. So (Brad: It's just "Till") here we are in this podcast, (Brad laughs) helping you figure out words, the English language.

Brad Crowell  

Like we do. Anyway, thanks for that listener question. Any chance I get to talk about cacti - Oh, shoot, I went there - I'm in on that. And if you're ever in in the neighborhood, make sure we know it and I'm happy to show off our garden.

Lesley Logan  

If any of you know Emily's Garden Show. (Brad sings: Emily's Garden Show) I feel like Brad just has a hijacked a segment of my own podcast. (Brad and Lesley laughs) I'm calling ...

Brad Crowell  

It's Brad's cactus show.

Lesley Logan  

All right, so onto Renee Dick.

Brad Crowell  

Yes. All right. Let's talk about Renee. Renee Dick is the person that you want on your team. She is willing to be the first to try it, break it, build it, be it, paving the way for others. She ...

Lesley Logan  

That was a good song. Try it, break it, build it, print it, da na na na. Faster, Stronger, na na na na.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, that's my favorite band. (Lesley: Oh) (Lesley laughs) That's Daft Punk. (Lesley: Oh) Ah, paving the way for others. She is a mom who has changed her path for being unhappy hairstylist to being a charismatic entrepreneur, helping others with repurposing content and social media marketing. You will literally laugh out loud at things she says and you will totally fell in love with her. And I'm sure that anybody out there who is looking for social media help, you know, contacting her would be really fun. Anyway, I'm not kidding. I listened to the episode twice and I was just laughing so hard. It's lovely.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, it was I ... I re-listened to it and I laughed out loud because I had done some interviews so far from when they were actually like, played till like... Because you launch a podcast, you do all these things. And I was like, "Who said that? Was I talking to you? Who I was talking to?" And when Brad was listening to this, to produce it, he's like, "You were talking to Kareen," I was like, "Oh, that's right." (Lesley laughs) So anyways ...

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, when you when you said the ... habit or hustle versus hassle that was (Lesley: Yeah) that was the convo you had with Kareen ...

Lesley Logan  

... Kareen in another podcast. Anyways, it's you can find that episode it's titled, "Don't let your hustle be a hassle." 

Brad Crowell  

Yes, that was Episode 27.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, we love her. Okay, so I had there's so many things I love that she said but I really I had to go with the "Act now think later" because y'all, Be It Till You See It does not mean overthink it, micromanage it, debate whether or not you're able of doing it and then taking action. No, it is Be It Till You See It is like, kiss... go just take some go for it. And then you'll have all this clarity and then you can decide what you want to do with what you just did. So, I loved that. What about you?

Brad Crowell  

The the thing that, it was interesting to listen to her talk about, she kind of skimmed over not not living in your purpose at the beginning of the episode. And she said like, "We can we can get into all that." But the reality is, "I just wasn't, and I wasn't happy." And she talked ... she the way she described herself. I found very relatable, because she was talking about how she couldn't be happy for other people, she was very negative all the time. Right? And she was just in this really this funk and ... the idea of living in your purpose, I thought ... I don't know, like, here's the here's the thing. She is clearly charismatic, right? So when you're ... when you're negative about everything, and you're charismatic, you will be in a position to inadvertently bring others down just by being you. Right? Because you have that same power to bring others up by being you and I'm so happy to have met Renee today, now when she's clearly living her purpose because she's just exuding joy and excitement about life then then before you know so (Lesley laughs) I'm just saying because it could she could ... I she has the I'm very similar, I have the propensity to be very dark, I have the propensity to affect the room, right? Really change the vibe and and so I know that for me when here's the thing I used to say, "I don't care what I do as long as it gets me paid," I literally used to say, "I would shovel shit from one corner of the room to another if it's going to pay my bills so I can go do the things that I want to do and and and I'll do it, I will I will make that happen" and I lived with that philosophy for the majority of my life and so consequently I was you know metaphorically shoveling shit from one corner to another for a very long time and now that I'm doing something that I actually want to be doing that I am enjoying doing that I know is affecting people in the way that I see is positive. Right? It makes me so much happier. So, I just wanted to say I think that the idea of living in your purpose like it's hard to ... if you don't know what your purpose is which is a big fat question mark you know was up for a long time for me as well, you know, if you're just going through the motions if you're just doing life, you know or your job or your gig or whatever it might be, you know it's okay to go explore something else and begin to identify what you might want to be doing instead.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah and then sometimes it's easier to not know, like to know what your purpose is not. So, like sorry ...

Brad Crowell  

Oh yeah, I see ... (Lesley: So if you ... ) Yeah, (Lesley: if you're like ...) Say that again, say that again.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, I said it out I was like, "That's not it." (Brad laughs) So that definitely didn't work and so if you are like, "Ah guys I still, I get you, I want to live my purpose. How do I do that?" If you don't know yet what your purpose is, which I think deep down you might (it scares the fuck out of you.) Or you're just not sure you can see the big picture or how it's going to pay your bills or whatever. You can it's easy to know what your purpose is not. (Brad: Right) So, if you like have been selling houses and you're like, "This is, is (Brad: Is not lighting my fire) like shoveling shit from one to another." (Brad: Right) (Brad laughs) Then you can you can like go through all the things you do in a day and you can go, "Do I like any part of this? Oh, I really like talking to people." Cool. Now start signing yourself up for things where you talk to people and then you can start to go on the scale of like shoveling shit to this feels like a flow, you know ...

Brad Crowell  

Maybe maybe you shift to ice cream, instead.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, yeah. (Brad laughs) So anyways, that's just the help the people who like are not sure I kind of fell into my purpose. I'm gonna be really honest. Like, I did not even know I could become a Pilates instructor. I have that limiting belief. And then the reason I coach people on business or they have an online classes, just because people ask me a question. They're like, "Hey, how do you get so many new clients? Hey, do you think you could have online classes?" And I got curious to go back to Tina Tang. And so maybe also now that I'm a verbal processor, maybe you look at the questions, people are asking you do for them and see if any of those light your fire.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah. (Lesley: All right) Episode 31. What? (Lesley: Yeah. What?) What?

Lesley Logan  

Okay!

Brad Crowell  

All right, so let's talk about all those BE IT action items. What bold, executable and trinsic or targeted action items, can we take away from your conversation with Renee Dick? She said something that I, I wanted to, I agree with her and I also have gone down this path. And so I want to kind of put a boundary on it. (Lesley: And asterisk) Yeah, she said, "Say yes to all opportunities." And I, I think that that's great when you are getting the ball rolling and you're trying to figure out your purpose maybe, or find something new that you want to do or grow your business or whatever. But I want to I want to say, comma "Quit things fast when you see that they're not doing it or they're not serving you or they're not you know, lighting your fire," (Lesley: Yeah) because what ends up happening is I feel obligated to follow through with things that I have, you know, committed to whatever it might be but maybe I shouldn't have actually committed to it in the first place. Right? So, I think actually maybe a better way of saying this is, "Say yes to the opportunity, but don't necessarily commit yet," until you decide if that's like you know, really the thing that you should be committing to because otherwise you'll end up juggling 75 plates, stressing yourself out, not being effective at all. Believe you me, I've done this, I've lost friends because of this, like this is a real possible thing where you just (Lesley: Oh) get so busy.

Lesley Logan  

That's definitely like it happens when you say, "Yes" and then you get down the path and you aren't honest early on that it's a "No" (Brad: Right) then yeah friendships are like, "Oh my God you've been doing this for two years with me. Why are you lying to me for two years but how much want to do it?" So, I agree with that. I definitely love to say in the very beginning I said yes to everything and I totally agree when you are new when you are she does the you know chapter one through five business owner, yes because you don't actually know what's going to work or not work for you and what you're gonna like and not like so just say yes to all that. But once you're past that chapter five you know something I do as I say, "Yes but can you send me the logistics so I just double check with my calendar and my team because I 100% double booked myself I don't wanna do that." And that is (Brad: Sure) really fun. It doesn't mean I'm gonna say no later on, so if you're listening to so I say this to you it's not like code for it's going to be a no it's just (Brad laughs) it's a buffer, it's a buffer for me just to make sure (A) the next day when I see those logistics it's still a yes and (B) it aligns with everything and then if I doesn't I have like, "Hey, you know what I'm so sorry I really want to say yes this but the day of it doesn't work for me or the timing of it doesn't work for me you know I got asked to do something recently," I was like, "Oh my God that sounds amazing." And I got the logistics back I was like, "Oh, I pictured something completely different" that's not their fault, that's my brain went like 10 steps ahead, 'cause I'm an ideas machine, and so thankfully, I was able to say, "You know what? This is actually not in alignment right now but let's circle back if you ever do it like this," therefore if people don't mind, people don't mind. Okay, well we just had our own BE IT action item on that one. That was like a little ... if you're talking about cactuses. It's like one of the babies. (Brad: Yeah, right.) ... Barrel cactus. I wish they had a visual for them. Okay, my biggest takeaway is, "Open all the doors in the hallway and then decide." I (Brad: Oh) really love the ...

Brad Crowell  

I think, I hijack yours. (Lesley: No) Well, I know but what I was talking about is very similar. (Brad laughs)

Lesley Logan  

That's so funny. She and the others guys, if you ...

Brad Crowell  

This is an amazing visual, though. I'll tell you.

Lesley Logan  

She, she, you have to listen to us because she really did explain like, "You get into the hallway and you ... there's all these doors and you're looking for the master suite. You're looking for this" and I was picturing like, big windows that look over an Italian, like I don't even know, winery, I don't drink wine, but just like views, right? And, I was just I was just going down the hallway and I have these tools. And it's true, like, I think we we talked about this in the podcast where it's like, "If the doors locked, it's because it's for a reason." There's ... amazing (Brad: Sure) of this book called "The Third Door" which I would love to get that author on here. If any of you know him, grab his, grab him. I want him. So, but he has a book called "The Third Door." And it's all about like, you know, Lady Gaga, all these different people how they made it. They didn't they didn't walk ... (Brad: Alex Banayan) Yeah, yeah. So like the idea is that, there's the line to get into the club that everyone stands in. And then there's the people who are VIP who walk up to the front line and they get in, and people are in the line or like waiting to get in. But then there's other people who like go in through the window, or go in through the alley or like ...

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, they come in with the owner in the back.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, or they or they got a job there. And they were just singing at the bar, right, like so there's a third door and a lot of these people that we admire, they didn't go through the first two doors. They went the third door and so if a door is locked, it doesn't mean it's a no, it just means that that's not the door you go through. And so when she was doing this whole hallway thing, I was remembering that guy, and I was just saying this whole thing it's just like, ah, definitely open all the doors but what I love that she said is, "Open all the doors." She didn't say, "Move into the room with the bunk beds." (Brad: Right) Try it on for size!

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, that's what I mean. Like, like, say yes to all opportunities is like peek your head into the room, the door and be like, "Is this the right room?" (Lesley: Yeah) And then if it's not, you can be like, "Just kidding." Close ... (Lesley: Yeah) the next door, right? I was in the way that I was envisioning it when she was describing it was ... everything was pink, the hallway is pink, the doors are pink. There's just numbers on the doors. And like the it's like you're behind the set, like you're behind the scene, like the hallway itself isn't dressed up in fancy at all. And you're like, "They're just a bunch of doors that all look the same." And you're like, open, you're like, "Oh, that's not the master suite. That's the jungle," close. (Lesley laughs) Open the next one, "Oh, that's not the master suite. That's..." (Lesley: ... Jumanji) Yeah, we're in Jumanji now. (Brad laughs) But seriously, I loved the way she described that. Because it's it really is a, it's a great way to understand like, "Is this for me? Maybe not," close. Next.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, I think that there's an overall, arching theme in her in her episode, which is just like, just like, "Just do the thing." Like, "Just get, just get to the place, just do ... just open the door. Just say yes." And all of that is because we get in our own way, when we're like, "Let me just stop and think about it." Like we start to think about the different failures we've had in the past. And the different times we haven't fallen through with things that different times that people said something not nice to us or whatever. And it's like none of those things are actually happening in this thing. And so the faster you act, and the faster you go through these things, the quicker you're able to get to the master suite, the quicker you're able to get to the place that where your purpose is because you're not overthinking it and clouding it with stuff that didn't even happen in that situation. So anyway, I don't know. Maybe that's not her purpose ...

Brad Crowell  

No. I think that's a that's a great way to to to describe it. (Lesley: Summing it up) Oh, yeah, it's a great way to wrap it up. We're gonna leave it there.

Lesley Logan  

All right. I'm Lesley Logan.

Brad Crowell  

And I'm Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan  

Thank you so much for joining us today. We're so grateful you're here. How are you going to use these tips in your life? Let us know by sending a DM on Instagram at the @be_it_pod and we'll catch you on the next episode.

Brad Crowell  

Bye now.

Lesley Logan  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review, and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!

Lesley Logan  

'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.

Brad Crowell  

It's written, produced, filmed and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan  

Kevin and Bel at Disenyo handle all of our audio editing and some social media content.

Brad Crowell  

Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan  

Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all the video each week so you can.

Brad Crowell  

And the Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

Meet Renee Dick, a social media and content repurposing queen! She shares her story of being an unhappy hairdresser who realized she was being negative all the time - and how she changed her world view. Together, she and Lesley cover how to live for your purpose, why do self development, being a trail blazer, community over competition, and so much more.

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] .

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• You don't have to have all the answers
• The story behind Renee's branding
• Not living in your purpose
• The boundaries you put in place when making personal change
• Self development
• The hardest part of being in a room with people you don't know
• Being the trail blazer
• Community over competition
• Act now think later
• Lead with your heart, not your ego

Episode References/Links:

• Renee Dick's IG
• Amy Ledin's Podcast F* It
• David Meltzer
• Andy Frisella's podcast
• Humble the Poet's book, Unlearn
• Brené Brown Podcast
• Dubsado
• Dreams to Plans Podcast

Guest Bio:

Renee Dick, creator and founder of the Fresh Perspective Community with a focus on providing tools, support, and resources to serve female, small business owners. With an obsession for repurposing content, and Pinterest marketing Renee launched a done-for-you content repurposing and Pinterest management agency that breathes life back into your content so you can reach as many people as possible! Renee is also co-host of the Dreams to Plans Podcast which serves another fun outlet to connect with the creative community.

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.

Resources

• Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!
• Lesley Logan website
• Be It Till You See It Podcast
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube
• Profitable Pilates

Social Media

• Instagram
• Facebook
• Tik Tok
• LinkedIn

Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan  

Oh, my goodness. Welcome back to the Be It podcast, the Be It Till You See It podcast. I'm Lesley Logan and I am beyond grateful that you're here. I'm also completely on fire and cannot wait to take on my whole day, after just getting off of this interview with Renee Dick. My girlfriend, Renee, I, we ended the podcast and then we talked for another 30 minutes before she to start her podcast. So it's safe to say, this podcast has lots of gab, lots of ways that you can see yourself in it. And when you get, you have to get to her tips on how to Be It Till You See It at the end, because I visualized everything that she was saying. And it made me even more fired up to do what I have to do for myself today. Look, you know, wherever you are, whatever it is that you're trying to be, maybe it is to step into a new group of friends, or maybe it's to step into a new gym, or a new job or to start your own thing. There are so many gems in this podcast, and I can't even wait for you to dive in and hear how Renee stepped into a room that she probably didn't feel like she should be in but she made herself do it anyways, and, and how she changed the perspective of that it's nothing short of inspiring, but also something you can totally do, you can totally do it. And I'm all about bringing you women, and we have a few men who can help you see how you can Be It Till You See It that you don't have to have all the answers. And so this whole podcast, I just can't even wait for you to hear it. So I'm not going to keep talking Renee Dick, as you can find her on Instagram at @mygirlfriendrenee. And you can also listen to her on her podcast if you're interested in business tips for small business owners. All of the stuff about her and her amazingness is in the show notes below. So please check it out. And without further ado, we'll actually a little ado, we have a little short message for you. And then we'll get to dive into this really fun, really awesome interview with Renee Dick.

Lesley Logan  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast, where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Lesley Logan  

We are recording. Okay. Hello. Welcome to the Be It podcast. Oh my gosh. Okay, so true story. I heard this woman on my friend Amy Ledin's podcast and I was doing my Pilates workout and Amy Ledin was a guest on this podcast. She's one of my favorite women in the world. We have an accountability call, accountability call every two weeks. And you came on and I was like talking in the podcast to the two of you as it was a three way conversation. And it didn't even occur to me that like you were not actually responding to me. (Lesley laughs) And I don't even think I waited for the podcast to finish before I was like sharing it, tagging you and like voice dm-ing, "Oh my God, I'm in love with you. I want to have you on mine. I want to have you in my, my communities." And then Amy said, "Oh, you have to meet her. Want me to introduce you?" Like we're already talking. We already have a call on Monday. So without further ado, my girlfriend Renee, why don't you share about who you are and what you do.

Renee Dick  

You know, I'm not surprised this happens all the time. (Renee and Lesley laughs) I get this message daily. (Renee laughs) Just kidding. No, it was such a fun podcast to do. And it always that's the beauty about podcasts, is it gets you into other people's ears, it gets you into new audiences where you can become new friends, and not just sit on Instagram and hope to be seen. So it's just a great way to really you know, fast forward the connection. And I think you meet such good people. I'm so I'm so excited to be here. It's gonna be such a fun topic today.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, thank you for being here. So, Renee, um, I mean, you are @mygirlfriendrenee on Instagram and, and the way Amy was always saying my girlfriend Renee, my girlfriend Renee said so I just want to know, how did you decide to be "My Girlfriend Renee" and also, what do you do?

Renee Dick  

I know always asks that like cuz it could be, I could be a hooker. Like, I, nobody knows exactly what (Lesley laughs) "My Girlfriend Renee" is and I'm like, that's where branding comes in. Right? Because you have to know and see because once you see me, you get it. But when you hear it, (Lesley: Yeah) you're like, "My Girlfriend Renee... What?" (Lesley laughs) But no, no, I started my business in 2019. I was at a woman in business conference. I had like, no computer, no nothing. I used to be a hairstylist. I've always worked for myself. I did like hair styling and then I was a spray tan technician. And so I became a stay at home mom and I was like, kind of going down that rabbit hole of like this isn't the life I'm supposed to live, I was not living in my purpose. I can go down that whole rabbit hole, but blanket statement, I wasn't living my purpose. And my husband was like, "Girl, you need something." So I go to this woman in business conference, and I was like, "I'm gonna start a blog. My husband told me I need to start a blog. I'm gonna do it." And so I did. And I was coming up with the name. And I was like, "Okay, what am I gonna call this thing?" You know what I mean? I don't really know, I don't know what my content is going to be. It's more like lifestyle. And it took me back to my hairstylist days, where people would say, "Where do you get your hair done? Who does your hair." And everybody would always say like, "Oh, you got to go to my girlfriend Renee." Or, "Who does your spray tan?" "Oh, my girlfriend, Renee does it." So that's how "My Girlfriend Renee" was born and it just hit. It was perfect.

Lesley Logan  

I love that. So I, I love the story behind things. So I think some people make it a little harder. Like, "I don't know what to call this." And like people are taking their time to figure what to call something. And it's oftentimes if you just look back to when you were having the most fun, the name is in there. So I know that you mentioned this briefly like you weren't living in your purpose. And I think that I think it's easy for people to go, "Oh, yeah, I understand that." But like, on a surface level. And then I think if you ask someone like, "What does that mean?" So everyone not living their purpose to me, it's very different. It looks different for everybody. So and also, if you've never really lived in your purpose, it's, it's kind of hard to know, because you could just go your life without living in your purpose and it's like the same. So how did you, I mean, he was awesome to like, say, "Hey, what's up? We do something here." Awesome husband, but what what what were the feelings that you were having that were like, you're not living in your purpose?

Renee Dick  

Well, you immediate... I think it's that feeling of like, you know, you're supposed to be doing something, right. You can't put your name on it. You don't know exactly what it is. But you know, that there's something missing, you have this for me on to be a 100% real with you guys. I was so negative, I was insecure, I was jealous, I was competitive. And it was all of these feelings that weren't me. Like, normally, you know, you're happy, whatever but when when you start to get down this spiral of, you can't be happy for anybody, like anytime somebody would when, I would be negative, or anytime somebody would be doing something, I would be sitting in my mind like, "Well, what does she have that I don't" and it wasn't in a good way. And I can feel it going deeper and deeper and harder and harder. I just couldn't be happy for anybody. And it wasn't like I can say, you know, there was a reason behind it. There wasn't a reason I just personally could not figure out why I was one - getting anxiety, two - why couldn't be happy for anybody, why I was so negative. And the more I the more personal development, this didn't come overnight or anything. I've put in a lot of years and personal development to get to this point. But it was because I wasn't living my purpose. I wasn't channeling who I am supposed to be on this planet, like, "Who I'm supposed to do? Who I'm supposed to speak to?" And I wasn't channeling that, I was living a subpar version of me. And the way that I've heard it explained perfectly is from David Meltzer. He says, like, all successful people feel this pressure, right? You feel this pressure of like something and you can't really name it. It's not people that put this pressure on you, it's yourself. And he says, all successful people must be what they can be and ever since I heard that, it made total sense. I was negative, I was complaining, I was not happy for anybody, because I wasn't happy with who I was. And that is where the switch happened. And that's where I started to do the personal development. That's when I knew that I had to, I had to catch up to my girlfriend Renee, who she's really meant to be.

Lesley Logan  

Oh, okay, I have heard that quote, before and I it's like, I think it needs to be on a shirt. And it needs to be on a picture. It needs to be on people's phones. Because it is true there's some, I think for some people in my life who are like, "Well, you're working so hard, you're working so hard." And I'm like you have to understand like, not working like not working doesn't make me feel better. It actually makes me feel like I'm not my purpose and there is a balance there. Like there's I don't know if it was you and I ever talked about this, that there's a difference between hustle and a hassle was that you in a conversation? Somebody, I was talking with someone a couple weeks ago, and about when about when we met and I was like, you know, I don't think I feel like hustle gets a bad rap because there is a hustle to working. But it's a hassle that's where it's different. But I do I do think that you're right. When you're successful person, there is a pressure that isn't from you and it's not from other people. But it is because you know that you have this, like this place to be on this planet. And there's this pool and if you are not going that direction, then it's very easy to drop into that negative vibe. And then if by chance the people in your life are those people already because they're not in their purpose. And it's just like such an easy spiral and I remember I had to move towns, I lived in Orange County. I lived in Newport Beach and I had to move to LA with a girl I just met because I just needed to be I was like, "I have to change my environment. And I'm just gonna move, I'm gonna tell everyone I transferred. (Lesley laughs) I'm gonna move and I'm gonna make new friends." Because I couldn't, it was really hard to be that positive person when everyone was being that negative vibe. And if you are trying to do that personal development and try to change, you kind of have to put some boundaries in place. And so when you start doing your personal development, what what I mean, what changes did you see first, what changes do you have to make? Because if you, it's not like you've got there overnight to being in that negative space. So you kind of there's things you have to do, right?

Renee Dick  

Dude, it's a constant battle. It's not just like, we just did a podcast episode on this, like personal development isn't like a diet that you can just do, and once you lose the weight, you're, you're done forever, right? It's like the same thing with personal development. You can't be like, "Yes, I can accomplish personal development. I'm done." Like it doesn't work like that it just keeps coming back. Because you keep bringing back these old feelings. It's a lifetime of crap that you have to fix or re-correct, correct or retra-ject whatever the word it is. But with me it was. I think when you start, I started listening to podcasts, and my husband had a two hour commute. So he was listening to podcast, I didn't even know podcasts were a thing. I'm like, "What is a podcast? Like, AM radio?" You know, "Will people listen this?" Like, "What are you talking about?" ... 

Lesley Logan  

I remember the day, "Lesley, are you listening to this Serial podcast?" That's what got me into podcasts was Serial, which I think is where everyone got into it. But (Renee: So freakin' funny) But I was like, "I don't even is, this on your radio? Is it AM? How do I find them?"

Renee Dick  

Legit! I was like, "What is the podcast?" But he had such a long commute that he had to find other things to entertain himself on the road besides a radio. So he started listening to Andy Frisella's podcast. And he was like, "You should probably listen to this guy." And I was like, "Okay." So I started listening to him and I had hit like 15 f-bombs in the first like, 10 seconds. And I was like, "Done, this is my guy, (Lesley laughs) wrap it up," like, here we go. And it just the one thing is it makes you see things differently, is switch, it's like this flip you get, it's literally a flip, that's the best way I can describe it, is you see your life a certain way, you see things a certain way, you see success a certain way, you see people and lives that they live a certain way. And when you finally hear it, you switch it to where now you understand, why they're living that way, why they are successful, why they're doing it, and it eliminates that ingrained feeling of successful people are lucky. It's only meant for some people, and you can never have it, they have some secret sauce that isn't attainable to you. And they just got they got you know, lucky. And it just makes you really dig into, "Well, why?" It starts making you ask those questions. "Why am I not that special? Why don't I have that secret sauce? What is it that I don't have?" And you start doing that's kind of like the snowball effect. Does that make sense?

Lesley Logan  

You're ... Absolutely makes sense. And I think it's like, you know, we see evidence for which we believe to be true as well, and our ears pick up on things. I think that our subconscious is also trying to attract and trying to understand. And when you listen to a podcast, first of all, even if you're in a negative space, you're not like, "Let me find the most negative podcast," like that's just not what you're gonna find because that doesn't sound fun. And people aren't really, I don't know, maybe people are putting out negative podcasts. But most the time you're me like, "Oh, I'm listening to Andy Frisella" and your brains gonna start to hear all this positive stuff. And then because our subconscious is so malleable, the more positive stuff you put in it out outweighs all those negative thoughts. And so it really does start to help train the brain and you start to hear the things like, "Oh, oh, that's how they do it. Oh, I can do that." And it breaks things down and I I think that I think for a lot of people, podcasts are such a great way for personal development, and it's free. You don't have to pay for it. Even if the podcast is like, if you join this thing, then you get no ads. I'm like, give me all the ads. I want to hear about the new stuff. (Lesley laughs) I want to support. But like I think I hope that more people are saying that you don't have to go to some seven day retreat, no knock on those I do retreats. But like you don't have to have the money and the time to do that you can literally make your commute your personal development time. And so you listen to Andy Frisella and then you, what made you start to want to work for yourself was like between the podcast and the women in business. What was the the leap there?

Renee Dick  

Well, I've always like worked for myself. I just didn't know I worked for myself. Like I didn't know it was called something, I just thought I was a hustler. I'm like I always found ways to make money. If I needed money, I figured out a way to do it. And I don't do well with people telling me what to do. I never went to school, I went to beauty school so I didn't have to go to college. Like you know what I mean? I went to all of these things to immediately get out of the norm like my mom worked nine to five my whole life, like I didn't. I knew that wasn't going to be my path. I'm like, she worked there for 20 years, nine to five Monday through Friday, every single day. I'm like, "What is this life like?" I knew I never wanted to do that ever since forever. And so um once I kind of started like learning listening to that I was like, "Oh, I'm an entrepreneur," like I didn't understand it. I was like, "Oh, I just don't like to work." Like, you know what I mean? But I did ... (Lesley and Renee laughs) I guess I was just stingy. I don't know what to keep all the money, I have no idea. So when I went to that woman in business workshop, and I met 30 other women that were CEOs, entrepreneurs, business owners, and I was like, "Holy crap, I'm not weird," like I find myself, (Lesley laughs) "Oh, my gosh, I'm normal." And I actually want to be around these people, like, the conversations were different. And so it kind of lit that fire even more that, "Hey, you have something here" and the way that I stood out and I embraced my confidence, because I didn't have anything and I was either like, "Okay, you're gonna go to this workshop with 30 other women that are business owners, and you're coming in with never even sent a damn email." Because when I did hair it was all handwork, you know, I never even owned a computer. And like, "You have two choices. You can sit in the back and be quiet, and say, 'Okay, I don't belong here. These people are, were too advance for me,' or I can own this shit." And I decided to own it. So I made the most biggest presence I think I can ever do in my life. And that's where it kind of started where I was like, "Alright, I'm gonna do this, and I'm never gonna look back."

Lesley Logan  

Okay, so that is insane. I think a lot of women listening to this have been in that exact same place, whether it's going to a fitness class, and they're like, "I've never worked out before." And so they like I used I taught, I taught in group fitness y'all I know where you sat, you sat in the back row, guess where I sat the first time I do Pilates. I was like, how far in the back could I go? And little did I know the teacher sat in the middle. So I was in the front row anyways. (Lesley laughs) And whenever I go to spin class, I'm like, "I don't do that at all." Now with COVID, I have everything in my house now. But I hated to go into a spin class. I'm like, "I'm in the front row because it's guys gonna come off the bike and he's gonna look at me and motivate me." (Renee: Yeah) And I'm like, "I just want to be in the back." But I think a lot of people go into these rooms. And they know, they felt the same way. I don't have a business, or I don't know what I'm doing in a gym class, or I don't know, I'm going to take a writing class and I don't I actually don't know how to write so they sit in the back. And you're you asked yourself this question, I could sit in the back and be quiet and think that I'm not good enough. Or I can make a big presence. And so you said confidence... Do you think that like, was there a time in your life that you were like, "I'm just gonna be in the front of the room?" Or what what did you tell yourself each day in that conference to like, get up and get in the front of the room? Or was it just that as soon as you did that everyone embraced you? Like I kind of want to feel like I'm in that room with you.

Renee Dick  

Well, you think about it you ... the hardest part is deciding to go. Right? (Lesley: Yeah) Like, I mean, that's the hardest part. Once you realize, like, "Holy shit, I hopped on the plane by myself. Holy crap, I'm staying at this hotel by myself. Holy crap, I just got an Uber." like, all of these things that you're like, "I just did all of this stuff by myself." That doesn't seem as hard because I'm like, "Okay, I just paid a lot of money to be here. So am I gonna get my money's worth? Or am I gonna throw this money in the trash?" That was my first thing was like, I I told my husband, "I wasn't working. I was a stay at home mom." So I was like, I just told him, I was like, "I have this pull on my heart. I have to go to this conference." He's like, "Go," and so I'm gonna let him down. Right? That was another thing. I was like, he believed in me. And if I go in, and I just sit there, and, "Hi, my name is Renee, nice to meet you everybody." Does that serve me or him or my son? No, I went to go kick some ass and figure out what's wrong with me. That's what I went for because I was tired of being who I was, I was exhausted. I was devastated. I was negative. I was just, I needed help. And so I had that option to say, "Okay, I'm going to be scared and just not get my money's worth. Or I'm going to soak every last penny out of the thing, because it costs a lot to get there." And so that's kind of the (Lesley: Yeah) choice. And what was really cool is like, so the first day, you know, how you do introductions, right? Like (Lesley: Yeah) anytime you go to a conference, like, "Hi, what do you do?" You know what I mean? (Renee laughs) Like, so I, they started going down the line, and everybody would just stand in their chair, like, we're at da... like tables, and they would stand at their chair and then stand up, they look at everybody. And you know, like, when everybody's introducing yourself, you're not really listening. You're like, "Oh my god, what am I gonna say? What am I gonna say? It's almost my turn. I have three more people to my turn. What am I gonna say?" (Renee and Lesley laughs) ...

Lesley Logan  

Well, I have a story to share. We'll keep going.

Renee Dick  

... You literally, you're not listening to anything Jessica just said, because you're like, "Holy shit, I got to talk to people." So I was doing that in my head and I'm like, "Okay, Renee, what are you gonna say?" Like, all these people are like, "I'm the CEO of this, and I have 30 employees." And I'm like, I'm gonna get up here and be like, "Yo, I got an iPhone." Like, what am I gonna say? So I was like, trying to figure it out. And I'm like, you know what, I'm gonna own this. So when it comes to my turn, I walk up to the front of the room on like, the stage. And I'm like, "I'm Renee. I have no business. This is what I'm here for. Never sent an email, but I'm here to do something. I don't know what it is, but I'm gonna do it." So I then I sit down, and everybody's like, "Whoa, okay." And then every single person after that went up on stage to introduce themselves, every single one. And I knew I had something. I was like ...

Lesley Logan  

Chills! You can't see this if you're listening but I have like the chicken skin all over my body. That is amazing.

Renee Dick  

Because every single person, it was almost like I didn't, I didn't know that now or then. But I know it now like, I gave them the confidence to do that. I took the first step, and I made that, okay. Right? I made it to where it was okay, I went through. So that's how I run my business too is like, I go first in all aspects of business and then I come back, I report all bloody, all bruised, and I say, "Don't wear these shoes, you're gonna need this tool, you're gonna need this knowledge and this is how you do it." And that is kind of how I've built my business is like, I go first, I eliminate the fear and I report back to you. So your journeys a little bit easier. I give you the confidence to go forward. Because we all need that, we do, we all need somebody to push us forward and I'm more than happy to do it.

Lesley Logan  

Oh, amazing. Okay, so I've been in that room. My first time I went in the mastermind, first of all, you know, I just the year before, I just spent like $30,000 in Pilates equipment. And so I'm sitting in this room, it's February, and I tell my husband, like, "I want to do this mastermind. I need to be in there." Like, I feel like I have gone as far as I can on my own. We know all the things, I've read all the books, and we're not scaling, like we're keep hitting the same numbers, and I keep having to trade time for money. Nothing wrong with that. But like, I know that my purpose is to help more bodies do Pilates, and I can't do that teaching one at a time. So I need to be in this room. And he's like, "Okay, well, you know, if it helps, we're not buying $30,000 of equipment this year." (Lesley laughs) So I didn't spend 30,000. But I did spend thousands. And I go in this room. And they part of me wanted to be in the back row, right? Like I was like I walk in and there's like six or six rows of tables, and two sides. And all the back row seats are taken. And the next row seats were taken. And I was like, "You know what, you paid a lot of money get in front row." (Lesley laughs) And so I was able to get into the second to the front row. And they went alphabetical order. So I'm a Lesley Logan, which means I'm dead middle, no matter how they do alphabetical. First name, last name, I'm in the middle. And you had to do a brag, you had to brag about like something you've done. And then you had to say why you're there and what your strengths were. Well, I was raised, like don't brag. It's not attractive. Nobody wants to hear you brag. And so be quiet, (Lesley laughs) so you should be seen not heard that was like, you know, so I'm like, "Brag? What do I have to brag about?" Like, I'm just this is me, when you're out of your purpose. I'm like, "I'm just a Pilates teacher," like these people are going up there. The first person to go up there was Amy Ledin. So guess what she did seven figure fitness business and I was like, "Whoa, we need to know her." And what am I going to say now? (Lesley laughs) And so I like but I also I was like you, I was like, "What am I gonna say? What am I gonna say?" And finally I said, just stop thinking about and just listen to what other people are saying. And what I realized was, we make people, we may think people are further along than they are. We make people like this big thing and we interpret that their success is like much bigger than we could ever have. And so when I got up there, and I said my brag, I was like, "Well, I've wrote a book... I've written a book, and I've traveled over a travel over a 100,000 miles a year to teach Pilates. I have a retreat house in Cambodia. Here's my strength and ideas machine and here's what I'm here for." Right? And I sat down, and people came up to me afterwards and they're like, "You have so much confidence." It was like, almost wet my pants up there. But the truth is, when you own it and you celebrate your wins, people don't see how scared you are on the inside. They only hear like what you said, and they too are so like, "I don't know why I'm here." And then we all you just rip the band aid off. So when you went up there, and you just gave people permission, you rip this band aid off to make everyone feel comfortable. And then they were like, "I need to be friends with My Girlfriend Renee. She makes me feel comfortable." Okay, so now, since then you have started your blog, and you have started your business. And what since you know, I mean, you've done so well in the last couple of years. But you had to you had to be this business girl before you're the business girl. So how did you do that?

Renee Dick  

It's so crazy. Because it's evolving, right? Like you like now when I look back of where I started the blog is it taught me what I needed to know which I'm so thankful for but it isn't my thing. Like I don't it's the it's the last on the train versus the first or the first stop, however you want to call it, but I needed to know that. So it's like this, it's so funny because you think in the time, you have to know everything now and when you decide something, it's your end all be all. And that's never the case.

Lesley Logan  

It's in concrete. You can't change it.

Renee Dick  

Yeah. And people think that when they start their blog, or they start their thing, they're like, "Okay, so the name is so important because if I do my name, then I'm locked into it." And it's like you're not! Nobody's locking you into anything. If I would have thought that I would have stayed where I was, I wouldn't be where I'm at. I wouldn't have all these opportunities, all these businesses that I run and branches of my business, if I would said, "My name is Renee, I'm a blogger. That's all I have." And I would have stopped there and like, stopped, you know, evolving and stop learning and stop taking on more opportunities. I wouldn't be who I'm supposed to be but it evolves over time. And I think that's the hang up a lot of people have is that they think that once they start, that's their it's, it that's it, that's their path. And it's not it's (Lesley: Right) it's, it's ever changing.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, well, um, Humble the Poet in this book, I think, I actually don't know what the books called. Anyways, it's on Brad's desk, we bought it, we put it in Amazon cart, and one of us bought it. But he has a quote that says, "We are constructs not concrete" and so you're always changing. And if you think of yourself as concrete, then you are going to limit yourself and you're going to actually feel like you're not in alignment, you're not your purpose. And it's going to get really hard because it's not fun to just be, to just stay what you were 10 years ago or two years ago, like your body isn't the same, like my skin is not the same as last year. So. (Lesley laughs) So, I mean, I think that's really cool that you you welcome that and you appreciate that and then you don't let you didn't let, "Okay, I'm gonna start with this be this is all I do." You actually kept going and seeing what you attracted and I agree. Like, I feel like if I just stayed teaching Pilates, and I was like, "I'm only a Pilates teacher, so I only teach Pilates." Well, no, actually, I teach business. You know, my husband, I like to give dating advice out, it's super fun. (Lesley laughs) You know, in my next life, I'll just actually be a dating coach, that would be really fun. So, um, alright, so you that blog, though, led to you creating more, and so you have an amazing community that you've created and how did that come? Like, what was what was that? Because I think it's really hard to, for people to take the next step because they do think they need to see the whole picture. And it's, I don't know, did you know the whole picture? I'm someone who sees the picture and then knows the first next step. That's me.

Renee Dick  

No, not even close. I would love to be that person. I know, I have a vision, right? There's this blurry vision. That's just my best self down the road. Like, I know she's there but I don't know how I'm getting there. Right? So with me, I started the blog and I was so like I said I was so in that point where this is where people were still shady. Like, nobody shared what they were doing. All the people that have the cool profiles. Were still like, you know, trying to hide behind the curtain. Like, "I'm so cool." And I was just sick of it. Right? I was like, nobody wanted to help. Nobody cared. Everybody's insecure. That was before, like community over competition was like a thing. (Lesley laughs) So I was like, building my own website from scratch, right? Like my husband, and I built my blog. And people were like, well, "How did you do that?" You don't they knew me, because my followers were, you know, my friends and family. And they were like, "How the hell are you doing this? You were a hairstylist, you were a stay at home mom, how are you building a blog?" And so I would share and I'm like, "Well, I'm doing this." And then I would, I'd be like, well, I want to cool Instagram, like all these other bitches like, you know what I mean? And I was like, I'm gonna figure out how to do it. So I would and then I would share it. And I'd be like, this is how I found it. This is how I do it, take it or leave it. And so my content started shifting to answer questions from people that were like, "What are you doing? How are you doing this? Blah blah." And so my content started shifting to that and that's how I started attracting other small business owners. Because it was like, "Well, I want my Instagram to look like that too. Well, I need a blog too," and it was just kind of like teaching through what I was learning. And so my friend was like, "Hey, you should start a boutique, you like taking pictures of yourself" because I needed to monetize somewhere. I was just doing all this stuff for free. (Lesley: Right) And eventually, I got to make money somehow I didn't know how ...

Lesley Logan  

... Gotta make some money. (Lesley laughs)

Renee Dick  

Right. I make money, up in this is bitch. So I started a boutique and I was like, "Why not?" Googled it, figured it out, started selling clothes and I thought I was crushing it. I was like, "Dude, I am crushing it. I have this babe support babes tee. It's selling out month after month and I'm crushing it. I'm making all this money." And my husband was like, "No, no, no, you're not. You're selling the small. (Lesley laughs) You're not selling the larges, Renee." And I'm like, "What do you mean?" He's like, "You think you're making money because you're selling out of your smalls. But with wholesale, you have to buy in multiples of six, two small, two medium, two large. You're selling your smalls. Your larges and your mediums are stacking up over there, and I'm sick of looking at them." And I was like, (Lesley laughs) "Oh crap," so he's like, "You need to make your own shirts so that you can control the inventory and you can control your spending." And I'm like, "Alright, fine. I don't know how to do that." He's like, "We'll figure it out." I'm like, "Well, fine." So I did just prove him wrong. Figure it out, start making my own shirts. And people were tagging, like, so people would tag me in their stories. And then the girls would be like, "Oh, well, I want to meet with her. She's a small business owner. She's in your shirt. Well, she's in your shirt while I'm in your shirt." And then I started a Facebook group because all the girls were like, "Well, we want to connect." And so that's kind of how the community was born. So it wasn't, "Hey, I'm gonna create shirts and build a community." It was I'm learning that I'm failing at making money because my inventory is just sitting here. I'm thinking I'm crushing it, to. Now I'm making my own shirts and the girls are connecting because they're seeing you're wearing community over competition, well, you're wearing community over competition, we should probably connect. And so it kept evolving and reaching that next level. That's how the subscription was born. Because I was like, "Well, this is super fun, why not get a tee delivered to your door every month." And then, after it started growing, it was like, everything I did got me to the next step, if that makes sense. So the more I shared, the more attracted this type of customer, then I started listening every single time to my customer. And that's how it evolved. It wasn't me deciding to go for it. It was my customer and me working together to evolve my business.

Lesley Logan  

It's basically that action brings clarity. 100% like ... (Renee: Oh my gosh, yeah.) And, and whether or not you're listening, "Lesley, I don't, I don't want to make shirts," it's like, No see yourself in this. All she did was take action then she listened and she got clarity. And then she took action. And then she listened. She had clarity. She didn't wait to have all the puzzle pieces figured out before she actually started to go and do the thing. Like, I when I started OPC, all I knew was that I wanted more people doing Pilates. And I was like people have access to this. I'm traveling a lot. So now my clients will have access to me while I'm traveling. And then as it grew, they're like, "Oh, I would love to know what other people are feeling with the classes." And I was like," Oh, yeah, we should do this." And so now there's a Facebook group. And now that Facebook group is hundreds of people having the best time talking about their (Lesley laughs) Pilates practice, cheering each other on, asking how their kids are doing. And I did not see that when I was create... I was like, "This is the problem I want to solve. Here's how I'm gonna solve it. I listened to the people" and then so that's really amazing. Even if you're not trying to do business, if you're just trying to figure out like, what hobby you want to do to make yourself feel better on the weekend. Take action, and then listen, like listen and see. Did that make me feel better? No, it actually made me feel stressful. Pick a new one.

Renee Dick  

Yeah, no, it's so I love that because it's, it's something that I I 100% believe I'm gifted with that, like, I act now think later, where like, my husband is the complete opposite. He's literally the planner times, a thousands every piece has to be perfectly laid out 10 steps ahead, everything that can happen will have like he's one of those and I am ... (Lesley: Was your husband on boyscout?) No, which is funny. (Lesley: Okay) He just like just this planner guy. He's like a thinker, like he thinks 24/7. And so he's very type A, and I'm very like jump now. And like, we'll figure it out later, as I'm in the air, I'm that kind of person. So I'm lucky that I have that because a lot of people let that stop them to where everything has to be perfect before they take action. And that's never gonna happen. It's never going to be like you think it is, and you have to take action. And trust me the frickin net will appear every single time. As long as you're doing it right. And you're living in your you're leading with your heart and not your ego. Everything's always gonna be taken care of everything. I have no, no doubt in my mind. (Lesley: Well) ...

Lesley Logan  

I agree. Because ... unless you're a brain surgeon. (Renee: Yeah) Right, like, most of us are things that we're going to do, if you leap, the net is going to appear, especially if you have to leap whether you see the net or not. And I think like I think it was Brené Brown, who was in a podcast years ago. And she said that that thing is like the leap and the net will appear. She's like, "I want people to think about like, what would you do even if you didn't see the net? Like, what if you did like, even if you couldn't do the net? What would you do anyways?" And I am someone who's like, "If I can't get something off my mind, I have to do it, just so that I can like ... just stop thinking about it." And then it's like trying things on. Right? It's like I do it. And I'm like, "Oh, actually, I really liked that" or "Oh, this could be really cool," for so I'm, again ideas machine. So sometimes things aren't for me, there for others, but my husband is an Eagle Scout. So you know, we have everything and he really does like to plot things out. But he does. He's not so type A and that when we booked our honeymoon, we only booked our first flight and our last flight we should not book the flights in between and we went to three countries (Lesley laughs) and it was like, like a couple months before we're like, "Okay, so where do we want to go?" because we have a flight to Thailand and we have a flight from Japan but we don't have anything to ... (Lesley laughs)

Renee Dick  

... past I mean, I'm even not even close to type A and that makes me have anxiety, so heck No. (Lesley laughs)

Lesley Logan  

So but when he but when we actually traveled, we had a dropbox folder that was downloaded to the phone so you need to have internet with every single flight, every single day's itinerary, all the visas, all the things and he was he was in a band. So we went on like basic tour. We went on nine flights and 14 days three countries all these things. And I was like, "Can we do this?" He's like, "Oh, yeah, trust me I've been this is a tour." So but he's he will figure out the steps but he's willing to let me go a little bit, I have to sell him on the idea a little bit but he he will take the vision and then like break it down to at least I can get started.

Renee Dick  

Oh my God, bless. I could never do that in my lifetime. (Lesley laughs)

Lesley Logan  

So okay, so now that you um now that you have your community and it's ... your two years in and you're listening to this, what are you, what are you feeling called to you right now? Like what are you kind of Be It at right now Till You See It? Can you share? I mean, maybe ...

Renee Dick  

Yeah. So I just ... (Lesley: I'm putting you on the spot.) Um, so forever I was I've been using Pinterest to grow my blog because like I said, I didn't know what I was doing. And I was like, "Well, I've made this blog and why is nobody coming to see my amazingness?" (Lesley laughs) So I started googling and everybody's like, "Oh, Pinterest is the biggest traffer traffic driver, whatever." So, I literally spent a year just diving in on Pinterest and growing my traffic through Pinterest. And people kept saying, like, "Dude, you're like really good at this, like, you're really good at this." I started, my brand just became the Pinterest person. And I'm like, "Whoa, okay. Never had any intent of actually doing anything with it." And started, so I started like teaching me people on it. And I started realizing, everybody just wants me to do it for them. They were like, "I don't have time for this." (Lesley and Renee laughs) Like ... (Lesley: ... someone who does it.) Yeah, she's like, "Whatever you're doing is great but like, can you just do it for me?" And I'm like, "Oh, shit, there's a market for this. Okay. All right. I did not know." So I started thinking about how I can grow, because the community is almost like, it's for chapter one through chapter five business owners, right? It's that education, DIY, kind of like, you need to do everything yourself. You need to get scrappy, you're wearing all the hats. But I wanted to reach a different type of person, because I know that where I'm at mentally and what I've, I've honed my craft so good. And I figured out what my secret sauce is and what I'm freaking good at. And that is repurposing content and Pinterest marketing, because that's what I've done for my business. That's how my brain works. And I realized by meeting more people and kind of upleveling myself, other people don't think like that. And so I was like, Well, "How can I figure this out?" So I started launching Pinterest management, and then I started doing like an agency service. So that's kind of where I'm leaning towards now is (Lesley: Cool) utilizing my skill to what I feel like I'm very good at that. This is something to I think a lot of people don't realize, is something that you're good at that comes easy to you, doesn't come easy to everybody else. And I don't think we realize that because we think like, "Oh, well doesn't everybody know how to do this?" And no, they don't (Lesley: Nothey don't) like the beauty in what our paths are. Our purposes are is because we're meant to do something way different than everybody else. We have our own secret sauce. And that's something that I embrace. And finally, after I don't even know how long was like, wait, doesn't everybody think like this? When it came to like repurposing content? And I would teach them people like, "No, I don't think like that. That is even crossed my mind. And that's when I knew I had another business lined up." I was like, "Well, okay, here we go." You know what I mean?

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, that is I do know what you mean. And I think that you hit the nail on the head. And I think everyone listening, if you just think about, like, what does come easy to you, you you actually could monetize that. It's, um, so I get asked all the time, how you do all the things, how you do all the things. And even before I had a team, I was asked that, and I was doing all the things... And now we have people who do a lot of things, but I still do all the things that I love, I kept the things that I love doing. And I was like, "Doesn't everybody make their schedule about them? Doesn't everybody, like make it so that they have the morning that they want to have? And that they work out when they want to do it? And then they time block these things?" And it's like, "No, actually, people just let the day come at that." So so I was like, "Okay, well, I guess our next thing is helping people with time management and helping them put themselves first." But it's so easy to think, well, it's just a schedule, or it's just Pinterest. Like there's so many courses on it's like no the things that come easy for you the things that you see, there is a there's seven and a half billion people on this planet, there are a ton of people that that doesn't come easy to do ... Even if everyone that it came easy to monetized it, you'd still make money doing it.

Renee Dick  

Dude in this world, like I have paid people for stuff that I would have never in my life known people made money for. Right? Like the more you actually meet people, and you're like, "Wait, what do you do?" Like, you know what I mean? What do you do? And then they tell you and you're like, "Well, yeah, I totally paid for that." Like right now I have, because I'm signing on and doing my agency. And I have Dubsado, right, which my brain does not Dubsado is fabulous, but my brain just blah, right? So it would take me four hours to do the onboarding process, because I'm like, "What the heck, this overwhelms me." My friend that I met in a mastermind, that is what she specializes in, systems and processes for clients, and for agencies and for service based businesses. And I'm like, "What the hell, I paid her for it." Because I'm like, "Girl, you're gonna give me eight hours and set up my whole thing?" That is what she does, like, who would have thought, "Oh, I like being organized and creating systems because that's how my brain works. Let me charge for it." And guess what, she's crushing it. And who would have thought somebody like that loves systems and loves finding holes in people's systems into you know, automate and do that. Like she loves that! That doesn't even (Lesley: Yeah) register on my mind. And I'm willing to pay top dollar for it because guess what, it helps me be able to do the things I do love, like this stuff.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, 100%. I am, I think more people don't realize that the problems that they that are frustrating them, it would have taken you eight hours but also like, probably a weekend before thinking like, "Oh my God, I have to sit down learn this thing." And then like you get in, you're like, "I forget it." And then it takes longer because now you're like, "I'm gonna say check my phone because I'd rather do that then do this right now." And so it actually doesn't take eight hours takes 15 hours. It's really stressful. So I've definitely been there. Okay, so because people want to stalk to you, like, I want to stalk to you, like I stalked to you. (Lesley laughs) Where, what's the easiest place for people to connect with you? How can they find you?

Renee Dick  

Literally @mygirlfriendrenee on everything made it easy for y'all. I even matched up my profile pictures. I swear when people are like, "Oh, you can find me at my dash 123 girlfriend 495." I'm like, "Why do you do that to yourself? Make it easy. One name one picture. All platforms. My girlfriend Renee, find me on everything." (Renee and Lesley laughs)

Lesley Logan  

Amazing, and they can and they'll be able to see your your community there and your podcast there. What's your ... tell everyone your podcast name? ...

Renee Dick  

So my... Oh, yeah. So that one's different. So backup ... (Lesley and Renee laughs)

Lesley Logan  

... Oh you got to partner on that one. So, can't be my girlfriend ...

Renee Dick  

(Renee laughs) So it's Dreams to Plans podcast where it's just for small business owners. It's my other friend Kat. I'm a co host and she does stationery and wholesale and products and customer based service. And it's just, it's a good mix of two different personality types. She's like the super sweet caring and I'm just like this witty friggin just nightmare version that just gives it to you like it is. But it's it's a good way to get two different perspectives on your business. There's not a right or wrong way. So that's something that we truly believe in. It's called the Dreams to Plans podcast where we just talk about stuff like that. And it's just, it's everything you need for your small business. Just two different perspectives.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, I, I've definitely been bingeing out and I, you know, I love it. I love it, because you both do, are very honest. And sometimes you don't agree. And I'm like, "That's right, because there isn't one way to do everything." And so you're not going to agree and you shouldn't. (Renee: Yeah) So it's been so awesome to have you here. Everyone, please stalk her there. And then, okay, last question. I asked everyone, because this is so inspirational. It's so fun. But I am all about people taking action, because otherwise they are like, "Okay, that was good download, and then they go on their day." So, what is your, what would be your tips for help people Be It? What is something that they could do to prioritize being bold, executable or find an intrinsic value and motivation or targeted steps?

Renee Dick  

Dude, I mean, there's so many, one the net will appear right? We all know this. This is like rule number one in business and jump in the net will appear I guarantee it. But think of it like every opportunity is I like how you said trying things on. I think of it as a hallway. Right? Your goal is to get to this master suite with the jacuzzi tub and the big like dope ass balcony beat, right? But you're in this hallway. And you have to open all of these doors to find out which one is the master bedroom. So if you don't open those doors and peek your head in and say, "Oh, this is a twin bunk bed. I don't want that one." How are you going to know? So say yes to all opportunities, stick your head in and see if it's something you want to pursue so that way if you don't want to do it, you close the door and you keep moving on your hallway. Do not feel like once you open that door, you're stuck there. All you gotta do is hang out for a minute, just hang out see if you like it, if you don't like it, close it. Shut the door if you end up loving it keep the door open. Cool, you learn something new. That's how I think of it it's like don't overthink it say yes to opportunities so you know whether you want to pursue him or not. Who are you to say no.

Lesley Logan  

Ah! ... that's beautiful. I love it. I was pictured in the hallway as like looking (Renee: Right) my doors and and you know what some doors won't open and that's because it's not the door ...

Renee Dick  

Right and don't take it in. 

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, it's like ... going you know what, we're not even gonna waste your time with this one. (Lesley laughs) This is not for you ...

Renee Dick  

Yes ... trust that everything is happening like it's all happening in divine timing like everything is happening for you it I truly in my bones and proof and I believe it in my core that that is true.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, I guess there I would love it. I think if everyone could be born with this is all happening for you. (Lesley laughs) Get your time you fall that was happening for you. That's happening for you. (Renee: Exactly) Because we, the more we can ingrain that anyways. All right, my girlfriend Renee, love you so much. Love this chat. I'm gonna want to do it again. So we'll have to figure out how to make that happen. Please screenshot this, share it on Instagram tag @mygirlfriendrenee, tag @be_it_pod. Let us know your takeaways. It's how we get more information out there to people to help them, Be It Till They See It. Until next time. See you later. Thank you.

Lesley Logan  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And, follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!

Lesley Logan  

'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.

Brad Crowell  

It's written, produced, filmed and recorded by your hosts, Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan  

Kevin and Bel at Disenyo handle all of our audio editing and some social media content.

Brad Crowell  

Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan  

Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all the video each week so you can.

Brad Crowell  

And to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

If you've ever struggled with food or exercise, today's episode with Brad and Lesley will relate. They cover lots about self-care, overeating, undereating, finding a nutritionist, therapist, and the power of being your own health advocate, all while reviewing the last episode with Giselle Schroer.

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] .

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• 100withme Challenge starts Oct 3 http://100withme.com
• Life gets in the way of all of our plans
• Brad's self-care is traveling
• The value of hiring a nutritionist
• Overeating and Undereating
• Being your own health advocate
• Having a diet that is custom to your body
• Finding a therapist

Episode References/Links:

• Empowering Self-Advocacy in Healthcare
• Lesley Logan's Coaching Group

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.

Resources

• Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!
• Lesley Logan website
• Be It Till You See It Podcast
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan
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Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Lesley Logan  

Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It podcast interview recap where my co host in life, Brad and I are going to dig into the liberating conversation I have with Giselle Schroer (Brad: That's right) in our last episode, period. (Brad and Lesley laughs) If you haven't yet listened to that interview, feel free to pause this now. Go back and listen to that one. And then come back and join us or listen to this one then go back and listen that one and see if our takeaways match your takeaways, (Brad: Yeah) you do you.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, you know, someone said to me that they listen to the interview first. And then they guess at the interview points that we're going to cover during our recap (Lesley: That's fine) the following episode, and they try to figure out if they identify the same things that we're talking about... I thought that was cool.

Lesley Logan  

You know what, somehow we should do a contest and have people like submit their takeaways to see, I don't know how you do a blind though, because like, I want to make sure that they don't think that we're being fishy to see what their takeaways are to make our takeaways but I want people to have to submit, you know, like that marriage, that marriage contest like newlyweds? (Brad: Oh, yeah) Where like they asked a question, but you'd already written your answer down. You flip the card up. I want to do that. How do we do that?

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, we're gonna parking lot that idea for now, but I like it and I'm in...

Lesley Logan  

When we do live podcast recaps.

Brad Crowell  

Oh, that will be fun. That could be fun.

Lesley Logan  

That can be fun. Okay, anyways,

Brad Crowell  

Good idea. Let's talk about that later ... (Brad laughs)

Lesley Logan  

Ideas parking lot. Okay, y'all, Brad,

Brad Crowell  

Tell me!

Lesley Logan  

I'm so freakin' stoked. (Brad: Oh, good.) It's only a few days away that we kick off our fourth 100withme challenge the "Me, Myself and I" themed one... 30 (Brad: That's right) days of self care, being first in your life, filling your cup first ... (Brad: building healthy habits) in a really awesome safe container because I am not going to let you judge on yourself, shit on yourself, beat on yourself. All the negative self talk if you miss a day (Brad: All the self) Yeah, if you miss a day, we are going to change the way that the curves pass in your brain that go from when you miss doing something you wanted to do for yourself to how you think about yourself afterward. We're changing that. So ... (Brad: I like it) Anyways, (Brad: it's important.) We have hundreds of people signed up.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, hundreds, literally hundreds (Lesley: It's insane.) Yes. And there's still room for more. So, if you are not yet signed up, go to 100withme.com. (Lesley: 100) Join us, you don't want to miss this is actually going to be a huge party. It's gonna be I think, even more exciting than any of the other ones we've had just because we have a lot more people involved (Lesley: We have ton...) So it's really cool.

Lesley Logan  

We have ton of people celebrating their fourth 100withme, (Brad: Yeah, good for them) We got to figure out (Brad: We love them) how to give them an OG shirt but (Lesley laughs) but we want, everyone, we want you to join, too because here's the thing like, in... when you change your environment, you actually can make changes in your life in a way that actually sticks. And so bring your friends because then you really do change your environment when you're outside of this challenge. But also, you'll all be in this environment together. I'm not going to let you like shit all of yourself, I'm going to help you even if it's five minutes a day, we're gonna create consistency in your life, even if it's five minutes a day, because ...

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, look, the reality is a lot of people – what I've noticed, because I'm the numbers guy looking at everything, and I'm literally seeing every post that's happening is – half the people start. Like if if 100% started and they are posting and it's exciting. Half of them stop in like a week (Lesley: And then they aren't ...) and they don't come back ... They actually just dip out and they're like, "I fucked it up, I'm out."

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, they're and we, and that really bothered me. So, I actually started because I don't actually if you miss a day, it doesn't hurt me, my feelings. I don't even ... we just troubleshoot and figure out how to help you do this in a different way. That's how I see it. But I had I actually had to go study with a behavior scientists to figure out, "Why this happened? Why do people stop just because they missed a day" and what I found out is everybody does this. You're not alone if you do this. (Brad: Yeah) Everybody is like super highly motivated in the beginning. They do things and then of course, motivation is fickle. We know this it wanes and then they miss a day because life freakin happened. (Brad: Yeah) And they think, "Oh, I just have to stop," (Brad: which is totally normal and understandable) for they miss a week. And they're like, I just thought it's like, actually, no, we figure out what happened so we can make changes. So when life happens in the future, you don't have to go, "Oh, that's another thing, I can't commit to another (Brad: Well...) thing that I didn't finish."

Brad Crowell  

We could quote Giselle Schroer here, (Lesley: Oh, that's cool) let's she actually said, "Every single step, no matter how small, is a step in the right direction." (Lesley: Frickin love it.) And she said that in the last episode, and so it's totally applicable here. You know, if you get started in this episo... or in this challenge, and then, you know, in week two, like, you know, something crazy happens in life, and it pulls you completely out of it. Come back and join us for week three, it's okay, you know, like ... We are not here to judge you, we're not here to like, you know, put you down because you didn't finish... that's ridiculous. That's not what we're all about, you ... know, you know that by now. So, if you're not, in, or even if you're like, "I know, I'm gonna be traveling for two weeks," we don't care. Join us for anyway, (Lesley: join us for anyways, because...) Yeah. Meet the community, it's an incredible group of people.

Lesley Logan  

100%. And you will also learn how you can do part of something while you're traveling. So you can keep doing the things that fill your cup first, because (Brad: Yeah) when you're traveling, because we travel a lot to see family, and I do my my walks, I do my workout to do my things. Why? So that I can hang out my family, and feel frickin' awesome doing it. So we're gonna help you figure out ways that work for you in smaller, tiny steps, like Giselle said, so that you can actually feel frickin' good about yourself and, and live life for 30 days with all this dopamine going on. Like you don't have to do 30 minute workouts, you can do five minute workouts.

Brad Crowell  

Well, ... this, this ties right into our audience question, (Lesley: Yeah) which was this week, "What do you do for self care?" And, I know we have a handful of different things. But one of the things that I love to do for self care is travel. And so, you know, getting just changing my environment, whether that is like a quick travel where I'm like, "I want to go work from the coffee shop today." I used to do that all the time, less so now because it COVID and all the things, but it's starting to shift again and open up again. Or it's actually traveling like, like, "Let's go to Maui, or let's go to you know, see my folks" like you're just saying, seeing family, whatever. And you know, what is so awesome is that when you start to build those good habits, those good routines, you can take that with you on the road.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, they're super good. So let's talk about this audience question... anyways, before you do that, get your booty signed up for the challenge. (Brad: 100withme.com) Okay, so this question, I really love it. I love that you mentioned travel and stuff like that. And I know that you don't use travel as a reward for anything. So this isn't... that answer doesn't apply to this. But I think oftentimes, a lot of people think of self care things like massages, facials, (Brad: Sure) even like going shopping as like a reward for doing something like, "Oh, you know, I did this thing, I'm gonna go get a facial" and and I don't believe that self care should be treated as rewards for anything. It should absolutely 100% be kind of like the way you think of how much you have to drink water. Like it's essential for your survival on this planet. (Brad: Yeah) So one of the things Brad does for self care is like change in his environment and getting out and like in doing those things, he has other things he'll share. But I do a lot of things for self care. (Brad: Yeah) So, I actually treat my facials as routine, (Lesley laughs) not a reward. But my self care really does start with, I don't have like, it has to be an hour of this and an hour of that, or twen... It's like, I just know that my mornings have to be my self care. And then I have other things I do throughout the day. I don't know if I've shared this, but I also have blocks of time that I have, because I'm someone who, if my schedules are blocked off, things get scheduled in it. So there are blocks of time during my day that are just whitespace and then there's a list of things I can choose from to do (Brad: Yeah) that are self care, some of that's breathwork, sometimes it's reading a book. Sometimes it's going for an extra walk or calling a friend but like I have a list of things that are self care for me and so it doesn't have to be a workout. It doesn't have to be facials, massages, but it does have to make you feel energized when it's over. So, I would just ask yourself like if you're unsure because I know some of you right now are like beyond the need for self care like you're you're (Brad: burnt out, fried) burnt out and the gasoline gauge is like beyond empty and you are on fumes someone is pushing your car up the road to a gas station 10 miles away. Just have to look back at the pictures where you see yourself smiling the most and look at what you're doing. Put that in your list of thing to do for self care. I promise you, it's gonna make you feel freakin awesome. Well ...

Brad Crowell  

Well, I think also it starts with sleep. (Lesely: Oh, Brad ... self care) And that's I'm like, I'm not great at sleep. But I've started this past year with COVID. What I decided to do was take a nap when I'm tired. Like, if it's four o'clock, and I'm done, I'll close my eyes for 20 minutes. You know, (Lesley: Sometimes you does it at noon) Yeah, it just depends if I'm like completely fried because what I've realized is that I'm not, if I can't think well, I'm not serving anybody. I'm not helping me, I'm not actually getting it done, I'm not helping our team. I'm not writing, I'm not focused, I'm just sitting there doing nothing, it's better for me to sleep than it is to actually pretend that I can get something done.

Lesley Logan  

Well and everything takes longer when you don't fill your cup. When you are not full, (Brad: Yeah) filled, like, like going back to the gasoline, it takes longer to get gas, if you run out of gas. Like you have to push the car to the place and then you got to fill the whole tank up, not a quarter of the tank, they'll have the entire tank, our van's tank is crazy big, it is insanity. So you just, you don't want to wait until you're at empty to do your self care when you need it, you do it and if it's part of your routine, it's even better.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, yeah, that's, (Lesley: I love it) that's an interesting analogy, but we'll go with it for this one. I think that it's applicable. It's a good visual. (Lesley: Well, I've run out of gas many times.) (Brad laughs) So, but I (Lesley laughs) but you know, also too, I often, like for me, self care is turning my brain off. And I do that by watching a movie, watching movie I don't have to think about, you know, so whatever that movie might be the the point is, at the end of my day, instead of like, sitting there, thinking about reflecting back on my day and thinking and like letting my mind continue to mull over the problems I'm trying to solve. I will stop that by watching a movie or entertaining my brain so that it's just easy not to have to think (Lesley: Yeah) so that's one of the things that I do for sure.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, I want to hear what other people do for self care because ... (Brad: Yeah: What do you do for self care?) I want to hear like the craziest, coolest things do you do for self care. There's, I mean, the list is endless. It's also super personal. (Brad: Yeah) So, but it should be part of your daily routine... (Brad: No, not daily. Doesn't have to be daily.) No, I think self care, I think self care is daily.

Brad Crowell  

No. Well, sure ... I don't think that all of the self care is daily, like getting your nails done. You don't get that done daily. Right? (Lesley: Right) Like, so ...

Lesley Logan  

True. True. True. But but getting your nails done is not a reward for doing something your life is just part of things that make you happy and that's okay. (Brad: Yeah, exactly.) Okay, so correct. You, self care as a thing on your day is essential. What that ends up being doesn't have you (Brad: You can change) change. You can change. (Brad: Yeah) Correct. (Brad: Totally) I'm glad we made that clear. (Brad: Yeah) Alright.

Brad Crowell  

Okay, now let's talk about Giselle Schroer. (Lesley: Yeah!) Giselle Schroer is a mom of two boys. She's they are crazy, crazy, busy boys, as she describes. She's a health and nutrition coach and she is a certified personal trainer. She helps women to learn to love and nurture their bodies from the inside out through a balanced approach to health and fitness. She started her own coaching programs, working in group settings, and also one on one. And, I think that when I wrote this into, this intro, this bio to her I kind of didn't really talk enough about food, because for her nutrition is priority number one. And she, well, you know, if you listen to her interview, you know why, because she talks about how the lack of taking care of herself actually did not serve her at all, later on in life. She's 40 now, I think she said she's 40. And she, you know, but when she was in her teens and 20s, you know, had had eating disorders and a lot of really food issues with food, a terrible relationship with food, and also over exercising, overworking out. And so today, like roughly 10 years ago, she decided, you know, they wanted to have children and that really changed her path. And she realized, like, "Wow, I didn't set myself up for this at all (Lesley: Yeah) from a physical perspective." And so she is now helping women go through that battle of, how do you see food in a healthy way? And how do you see working out in a healthy way? As opposed to the unhealthy portrayal that we get from magazines and TV and movies and blah, blah, blah, you know, and anyway, it just was a really refreshing conversation with her because I think liberating is an appropriate word. (Lesley: Yeah) Because I think that where she came from to where she is today is, it's a huge win and I'm like, so happy for her. And I thought, like the way she talked about it made it tangible. You know, like, I, wow, okay, maybe that's like something that we should all be talking about.

Lesley Logan  

100%. I, I brought her on, because I'm lucky to be around a bunch of women who are in the fitness and wellness industry. And what I love about each woman that I'm bringing on in that industry is it's not what the magazines talk about when it comes to, what health and healthy lives and healthy bodies look like, they all are so ... such a proponent of like, being your your best self and loving the body that you have. And, and the way she sees food is just such an, it is liberating that's a good word for it. I love that.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah.

Lesley Logan  

Okay, so something that I took away from her interview, and I may have shared this in her episode, but if not, I'm sure I'll share it again. But she talked about being your own health advocate. And there's something you know, really important about that if you haven't listened to past episodes, you might not know that I suffered for stomach issues for years. And I went to doctors, and they literally didn't listen to me, or they kept trying to give me pills that just mask the symptoms that didn't actually solve the problem. And I, I don't know who told me that I could tell people, "No," or just find other doctors. But it's so important that if you are going through something that does not feel normal in your body, that if you don't get an answer that actually gets to the solution of the problem that you keep searching. We have so many friends in our lives who have different interesting issues. And so many times doctors don't really know so well, here's this pill that's going to mask those symptoms, but doesn't solve the problem. And if I hadn't been my own health advocate, I don't think I don't know that I'd be here, I would not be doing this with you. Because I was really, I was really not in a good healthy spot for a long time. So everyone, please be your own health advocate.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, and we are lucky enough that one of our team members, Lindsay, actually teaches people how to be a health advocate, in fact, (Lesley: Yeah. She made a course for us) she she did, she made a course for us at Profitable Pilates and she did a webinar for our coaching group on the power and the value of being your own health advocate,

Lesley Logan  

And also how to help others be their advocate. So there's a lot of tools for like, if you have someone in your life, who you can see is not getting the help that they want or not being seen in the medical industry the way that they want to be seen, teach them how they can do that. It's really freakin cool.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, check out the course, it's go to ProfitablePilates.com and look at the courses and you'll find one from Lindsay, Lindsay Moore. And it's about how to be your own health advocate. It's great. Um (Lesley: What do you love?) So, yeah, so okay, so this was interesting. I don't know if I loved this (Lesley laughs) so much as I related to it. So she talked about how you know, she's 5'10" and was, you know, underweight, a lot underweight. And she was, you know, for her body, she should have been eating, you know, at least 1500 calories a day, but she was only eating 1200 calories a day. Or maybe she was just using it as an example, I can't actually remember. But she was talking about how, you know, when you are eating so little, when you do end up eating, you know, the recommended more calories per day then what you're currently eating, your body doesn't know what to do with it, because it goes into mode, the mode of like, well, I guess I need to survive on 1200 a day. So when you eat 1500 or 1800 calories and it's like, "Extra food, I'll store it as fat!" Right? And it really jacks up your system even though your quote unquote "eating a normal serving," right. So what (Lesley: You did air quotes there) I did, I did the air quotes, I did that. (Lesley laughs) I also did say quote unquote, I did say that.

Lesley Logan  

Okay, you did. (Brad laughs) That's true quote unquote, (Brad: quote unquote)

Brad Crowell  

But basically, she was talking about weight and, you know, weighing, it's okay to weigh more. (Lesley: Yeah) It's so in you, you know, eating the appropriate amount of food. And this is counterintuitive, because I know that, you know, when you think about food, generally the generalization is, "Oh, I'm over eating, I'm eating too much." Right? And I actually, personally had the opposite problem. I wasn't eating enough and I didn't even know I wasn't eating enough. And because I don't have a scale in my house and I hardly look in the mirror. I would just go to the office and I would always skip breakfast. I was in a very emotionally difficult time in my life. And I was going to the office, I would never eat breakfast and then I throw myself into work, I'd have coffee, and then, you know, all of a sudden it'd be like, "Oh, shit, it's three o'clock, I gotta leave here at 5:30, anyway, I might as well not even take lunch, I'll just keep working. And then I'll leave here at five so that I can get home and I can eat dinner." And then I'll go home, and I would eat a whole pizza, or I'd make a steak or whatever. And at the end of the day, the literally the only thing I'd eaten was dinner, which was maybe I was gorging myself, and I was still only eating 1200 1500 calories. Right? And, and ...

Lesley Logan  

If that I mean, you don't unders... like it's hard to eat a lot of calories in one sitting.

Brad Crowell  

Right? You know, so and then and then, but but but, you know, compound that by six months of doing that, you know, and I lost 10 pounds, and I didn't have 10 pounds to lose. But I didn't even realize I had lost 10 pounds, (Lesley: Yeah) right? And then, you know, a friend of mine was like, "Bro, are you like, are you okay? ... like, you look thin." I was like, "What? No, I'm fine." And they're like, "Are you sure? Like go weigh yourself," I weighed 10 pounds less than what I thought I weighed. And it was actually a legit challenge to learn when and how to eat appropriately, you know, so that I was actually trying to get in roughly 2000 calories a day, right, or at least more than what I was eating before. So it started off with me by getting a calorie counting app, which is something that Giselle talked about. Because I was actually counting... it for me it was a wake up call to how little I was actually eating.

Lesley Logan  

And the thing is, is that literally food is your fuel. It really really is and ...

Brad Crowell  

Coffee is not your fuel. As much as we love coffee. (Brad laughs)

Lesley Logan  

I friggin love, it is a superfood. But the the thing that I've seen in the fitness industry is just that, like so many of my clients are under eating. And most of my clients are women, my athletes, my athletes were definitely very fueled. We can learn something from them, they are like very intentional about their fueling. (Brad: Right) But so many of the women that I would train, they were under eating, and they were wondering why they didn't look different or didn't feel different. And it's because what we don't understand is that we have we're relationship with food. And the... and Giselle talks about that such as negative and positives when it comes to it. And so I just think it's really important if you are at all interested in making sure that you're fueling yourself correctly, you definitely want to hire a nutritionist, this is something that like I added I ended up having to do, because after so many years of stomach issues, I was told, "Can't eat that. Can't eat that. Can't eat that," we got down to like, not, you know, a lot of things... and, and because of how busy my life is that wasn't good enough for me. Like, I couldn't live off of that. I didn't feel fueled. I felt exhausted all the time. I felt (Brad: Yeah) depressed and hangry. And ...

Brad Crowell  

And you would come home from the studio and go to sleep.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah. And so anyways, when I met with a nutritionist, she actually helped me figure out what foods worked for me. And it's very personal specific thing, this is not something... you don't want to pull off diets off the internet. And I don't, and diets don't mean that you're going on a diet, diets means the way you eat your food. (Brad: Yeah) So super, super important something that I have stru... I was striving for for so long, and I feel very successful at now is that like, I don't live on a restrictive lifestyle of how I eat. And I eat for fuel so I can do things like this, I can talk with all of you so I can film, so I can coach, so I can be present. And so I think ...

Brad Crowell  

Well, let's talk more about that in the next section.

Lesley Logan  

Okay, but anyways, I really do. I did love that she also brought up it's okay to weigh more, because I also think that we, I think very few women are very confident in how they look and that's based on how the media tells us what is pretty. And one of the things that I have seen, just in being a trainer is how different sizes can do amazingly awesome things. And so it is not about what you weigh and it's really all about how you feel. And so (Brad: Yeah) please take that as a note, because it's really important to me that people just feel good and feel strong in their body.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah. Well, that's, that's one of the things she said about 10 times in the last episode. It's like, "You don't even know how good you can feel (Lesley: Yeah) until you know, you feel good. (Lesley: Right) And, and I was like, "Wow, that's..."

Lesley Logan  

... It's like such a simple things (Brad: so profound) and also so profound. Yeah,

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, it's so liberating.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, yeah. Alright. So um,

Brad Crowell  

Alright. Finally, let's talk about the Be It action items from your convo with Giselle Schroer. What bold, executable intrinsic or targeted actions, can we take away from your convo with her? Why don't you go first? (Lesley: Oh!) We could pick up that thought.

Lesley Logan  

So, hire health coach, (Brad: Right) because as I mentioned, I had a nutritionist, I actually have hired many health coaches to help me out. Y'all, I definitely had some some bad stuff going on. So, I hired somebody, after being my own advocate, I found someone who did these, like 278 tests on my body, and (Brad: 278?) ...8 tests (Brad: 278 tests) and I did it twice. And then (Brad: A couple, a couple years apart.) Yup. And then from and then I realized, like, how much better I was doing, I also started working with a holistic doctor who we have coming up on the podcast, and she definitely continued to help me save my own life. And then I also work with a nutritionist, so I could really figure out what foods worked for me, which ones actually made me feel super strong and able to have energy. And, also ...

Brad Crowell  

I think that's one of the most like, that's like, the biggest misnomer or, you know, misunderstanding is like, you know, again, that food pyramid ... garbage, the the, you know, this guy who Lesley worked with, designed the diets of astronauts. (Lesley: Yeah) Okay, so ...

Lesley Logan  

Because they all can't eat the same thing ... They have to have different things, because we're all different.

Brad Crowell  

Well think about it. You know, you say that first off, you say that, like, "Oh, of course, the astronauts have to be at absolutely peak performance optimal, the best they could possibly be, you know, operating," because, you know, of the mission of going into space, like they don't get a second try, right. It's not like you swap them out. So those guys have to have their, their, you know, they have to be operating at the best possible place that could be. And so consequently, they each have their own diet based on their own body and the blood and all the things (Lesley: Yeah) and like all this stuff. So when you say that, it's like, "Well, of course, why would they not?" But then somehow we forget to continue with that logic ... because it's the same for us. (Lesley: Yeah) You know, why would it be any different for us? Like, I know, we're not going into space but still, if they're designing a custom nutrition diet for someone who needs to be opera... operating at peak performance? You know, we could take lessons from that for sure.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, I yeah. So, y'all, I mean, just if you are not feeling like you are, like, running at your optimal performance, it's so like, awareness is key. And then ask around, like, find people who will like who can help you, find a health coach that will help you, find a nutritionist or hire someone to do some blood work on you. Go... (Brad: Or you could talk to Giselle), you could talk to Giselle. I mean, like, honestly, it is, it is really, it's really, really important to me, because you you are the only person who can do what you do. And you can't do it if you are not fueled. Can't do it.

Brad Crowell  

Yeah. So, I think you know, hiring a coach to help you through the process is very, very straightforward, obvious step.

Lesley Logan  

Also save... Okay, not so obvious because for my stomach issues, because I had so many problems with doctors, I tried to do it myself. And we were like, do you remember the time we stopped cooking with oil?

Brad Crowell  

Yeah, I remember.

Lesley Logan  

We didn't cook with oil!

Brad Crowell  

For six months...

Lesley Logan  

I promise you...

Brad Crowell  

It was annoying...

Lesley Logan  

And it wasn't even the oil. (Brad: No) So here's what I'm gonna say. Just I know, it costs money, I know it does. But your time is also money (Brad: Yeah) and your health is not something to screw up with, as you heard from Giselle, like what happened with her and her desire to have children was totally affected by her not being fueled correctly. And by not like taking care of her health. So ... (Brad: Right, prior to that. Yeah) prior to that (Brad: Exactly) So, everyone listening, ladies and my gentlemen, too. But ladies, this is not something to DIY. Hire an expert and if you don't like that expert, find someone you trust. Find someone you like, ask your friends. Listen to the last episode, we talked about your one referral away. You're wha... I'm literally the people who saved my life are all people I was referred, too. (Brad: Yeah) There you go. What did you like? What was your Be It one?

Brad Crowell  

Yeah. So for me, it was about stress. And she said, she was talking about like self image and body image and body awareness, but she said, "Unfollow, and get rid of negativity in your life." (Lesley: Yeah) Obviously, she's talking about social media and what she was specifically talking about, like, when you're, you know, changing the way you, changing your relationship with food. It will, it would serve you to also change the things you're consuming, you know, in your from your social media. So she talked about getting rid of the things that make you feel guilty, of getting rid of the things that make you feel that shame that (Lesley: Yeah) that start that ... conversation of beating yourself up. I I had a different connection with that, in that for me, it was actually quitting my job, was this negativity that was in my life. And it was like a crushing weight of stress. You know, and, you know, guilt and fear and like like to the point were my cell phone would ring and my heart would jump into my throat. You know, and like, I mean, I would wake up in a panic and and I didn't even know how I got that deep into, like the stress and the fear of that thing. And, and I was just talking with him about this with someone about this just a few days ago, it literally took me six months after leaving that job for my stress levels to, for me to realize what was a, what was a quote unquote "normal amount of stress," as opposed to the insanely high stress environment that I used to work in, which was unbelievably unhealthy.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah. I really love this. She had some great ones actually but this one was really great, because I do think it's really easy for us to go, "Okay, I'm going to do this for my routine. I'm going to do this for my habits." And then we open up our Instagram, and we see all these things that like literally make us not feel good about ourselves. (Brad: Sure) And you can mute things on some channels, you can hide for 30 days, like Facebook has, like unfollow for 30 days, or Instagram has like a mute whatever. It doesn't mean it's forever. It just (Brad: Yeah) like, I actually think it's so important that we take responsibility for the things that like put us on a downward spiral. And there was a time when I literally had to, I went into my podcast, and I took all of our news podcasts, and I just literally was like, "Don't download, Don't show me, Don't download ... all of them." And I just went for three months wasn't even a long time I made this a long time, a lot of people, it was I left one up so I could stay in the know and I just did that. And I'm not kidding, my creativity came back, my energy came back, some things came back. And then when I was able to control my reaction to those things, then I was able to add some of those podcasts back in. And so (Brad: Sure) I think it's so important for us to go realize that, you know, when you're not in a great place when the muscles like think of it or like ability to deal with negativity, and all those things, think of it as a muscle, when you go to the gym and you haven't been to the gym in a long time picking up a 50 pound weight, not good, you might be able to do it not gonna be fun the next day, right, it's not gonna make you feel good. But if you were to start and get stronger, like sort of five pounds and add 15, whatever, you get stronger, then you got to pick that big amount. It's like super easy. So once I was able to get myself to a place where I could handle like filtering things that are not embodying the things are making me feel, oh, then I added them back in and I was able to go, that's that thing. I don't actually have to take that on. And so I just think it's really important for us.

Brad Crowell  

I think that's a, that's like so, such a parallel to the conversation, and to what Giselle was saying about her relationship with food. When she was younger, she was so connected to the way she wanted to look and so she starved herself. She over exercise, she did not eat anything healthy, right, to, you know, to achieve this look and she really damaged her body. And then, you know, but then like, how is it today that she's like winning? Like, you know, she's 10 years ago is when she started to change her relationship with food. And her changed wasn't like, flip the next day. No, it was a slow conversation, a mental battle, right? And so kind of what you're describing about hitting pause for three months, and then slowly bringing it back in when you're in a different place and you can think about it differently. That's kind of what Giselle was talking about, too, (Lesley: Yeah) with how she slowly began to change the way she, you know thinks about food, thinks about exercise.

Lesley Logan  

It's, it's just amazing. And if you're listening to this, and you're struggling with anything right now, please, if you don't hire a health coach, at least seek out a therapist in the area of (Brad: Yeah) fitness and nutrition, disordered eating, you're not alone, and especially right now is a, is something that is really happening because what else do we have control over except for like, how much we move or what we eat? And so please do not at all, build shame around that. And if you know someone who's going through this, (Brad: Yeah) help them be their own advocate. (Brad: Yeah. Amazing!) Alright, I'm Lesley Logan.

Brad Crowell  

And I'm Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan  

Thank you so much for joining us today, everyday whenever you listen to this it brings me so much joy, it brings us so much joy. We love talking about the takeaways and your reviews, your reviews are insane. (Brad: Yeah) They're so freakin heartfelt and I they they make me cry. (Brad: They're very encouraging) Thank you!

Brad Crowell  

Thank you!

Lesley Logan  

So, let us know how you're going to use any of these tips in your life by to screenshoting this episode, posting on Instagram and tag us (Brad: or leaving it and a review) or leave it and a review and and then send us a DM. (Brad: Yeah) We we love hearing from you, love knowing who is listening to this, wherever you're listening from and we will catch you on the next episode. Until next time, Be It Till You See It.

Brad Crowell  

Bye for now.

Lesley Logan  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review, and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!

Lesley Logan  

'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.

Brad Crowell  

It's written, produced, filmed and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan  

Kevin and Bel at Disenyo handle all of our audio editing and some social media content.

Brad Crowell  

Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan  

Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all the video each week so you can.

Brad Crowell  

And the Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

Giselle Schroer shared her liberating story of changing her relationship with food and working out from feeling trapped to being in control, and how she helps women through that same journey today. She and Lesley discuss eating disorders, health advocacy, weight, BMR and macro nutrition.

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] .

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• Eating disorders, body dysmorphia
• How eating disorders affected her dreams
• Being your own health advocate
• Food, nutrition, how we cause ourselves harm
• It’s OK to weigh more
• Hypothalamic amenorrhea
• Changing food slightly will make you feel different
• What is BMR?
• What is macro nutrition?

Episode References/Links:

• Giselle Schroer Health and Wellness on FB
• Follow Giselle on IG
• Giselle Schroer Health and Wellness Website

Guest Bio:

Giselle is a personal trainer, nutrition coach, mom to two busy boys and creator of The Macro Way group coaching program. She's helps women learn to love and nurture their bodies through nutrition and fitness. She doesn't believe in quick fixes, elimination diets, or anything where you have to restrict foods you love. She believes in a whole body, balanced approach and that the relationship between coach and client is a partnership as well as a friendship. She's helped hundreds of women learn to have a healthy balance with food, fitness, and motherhood, shed fat, build muscle tone, reduce stress, improve sleep and gain back control of their lives.

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.

Resources

• Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!
• Lesley Logan website
• Be It Till You See It Podcast
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube
• Profitable Pilates

Social Media

• Instagram
• Facebook
• Tik Tok
• LinkedIn

Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan  

Hello, welcome back to the Be It pod I'm so happy you're here. I just I'm, I'm loving, I'm loving picking guests out for you, I have to be honest. And as I meet different women and men as well, I think of how their life story or what they're working on can help you. And this particular woman, our guest today, Giselle Schroer, she is someone that I met in a mastermind, and I just heard her story and we got to talk, you know when, went to Mexico together as a group as well. And you really get to know people when you travel with them. And her, her outlook and her mission on this planet is so aligned with what my mission is, in an a, and also in a very different way. But just there's a lot of alignment, she is here to make sure that every woman feels good inside the body that they have, and, and fuels themselves. And so we actually talk a lot about fueling, and how we treat our bodies. And she has one of the most unique things that you could be doing for yourself right now, at the end of this podcast, what you could do next. It's, it's actually very simple and very obvious and common sense and something we don't do. And so I can't wait for you to hit the end. And if you're tempted to skip to the end, definitely listen to her journey and how she got to where she is. I think I think of her journey, and I think of a lot of the journeys of guests I've had and even yours. And sometimes or oftentimes really the reason we do what we do is because it's somehow we solved a problem we had, and then we want to solve it for other people who have the same thing. And, and so if you're sitting there like wondering, like, "What am I supposed to do? What am I... Why am I here? Why am I going through this struggle right now?" Right? Like, "What is this struggle for?" It's probably for the person who's coming after you in your life, who you're gonna help. And that's the only thing it's actually like a side note how I like to think about a lot of obstacles that I hit. Not necessarily in the moment I'm freaking human, definitely frustrated, frustrated, definitely shed a few tears, definitely want to have a tantrum, like why isn't this working the way it's supposed to? I did all the right things. I don't understand it's not working the way I wanted. And the lesson in it is something that someone else is going to need down the road. Or I'm going to need that muscle down the road. And so I encourage you, if you are going through anything right now, and you're really wondering, like, why is this happening to me? You know, it's not easy when you're in it. But hopefully there's a moment is a break in the thought in the loop that you can ask yourself, how is this happening for me, and what she her life set her up for was to help women, many like you. Fall in love with yourself and feel yourself so you can really be the woman that you want to be, the person you want to be in this planet. And I'm really excited. So I'm going to bring on Giselle right after this message. And I can't wait to hear what your takeaways are at the end. So thank you again for being here. And here is Giselle.

Lesley Logan  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Lesley Logan  

Oh my goodness. Well, welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast. Giselle I'm so excited that you're here. Everyone thank you for listening. So Giselle and I met through a mastermind a new one that I'm in and we sat down at each other's table. So it's like one of those things where I like had met people via the zoom boxes. And then we got to be in person and we went to their table and I just love your approach to life. You are a busy, busy mom of boys and you run your own business. And I'm super passionate about is women who run their own businesses. And and so we had gotten to talking about what you do and the things you do for women and I just had to have you on this podcast because not only have you been Being It Till You See It on your own life and in your business, but you coach people on macro nutrition that I believe I'm a big fan of how we fuel ourselves is really a big key component to us actually doing anything in this world. So welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast, Giselle. Will you tell everyone, Who you are? What you rock out? Where you're from?

Giselle Schroer  

Yeah, thanks, Lesley. Yeah, so like Lesley said, my name is Giselle. And first and foremost, like she said, I'm a mom to two boys, crazy, crazy busy boys who, thank God are not here at the moment, you would hear them in the background. But I am also a health and nutrition coach and a certified personal trainer. And I help women to learn to love and nurture their bodies from the inside out through a balanced approach to health and fitness. So yeah, I, I am a coach first and foremost, but I also like, haven't always had the healthiest relationship with nutrition and fitness. I've always been passionate about it, but not always the healthiest relationship. So I spent years battling eating disorders, body dysmorphia, punishing my body for not being what I thought it should look like, or maybe what I felt like society was telling me my body should look like you know, I wasn't necessarily as thin as the models that were gracing the covers of the magazines, or as my best friend who was, you know, stick thin. So I just continued to punish myself through eating disorders and over exercising. And unfortunately, those very unhealthy habits led to me dealing with a plethora of health issues from hypothalamic amenorrhea, adrenal fatigue, hypothyroidism, and eventually secondary infertility and multiple miscarriages. So it was years and years and years of learning, that, you know, I had done so much damage to my body, that something needed to change. So I mean, eating disorder started in like seventh grade, and I'm now 40, and my firstborn, what... is 10. So that was kind of 10 years ago was when I kind of started learning the damage that I had done to my body, and changing my lifestyle, and my, my food and my exercise. So yeah, and now that's kind of why I'm so passionate about helping women learn to, like I said, love and nurture their bodies, through diet and exercise in a way that is healthy from the inside out.

Lesley Logan  

Okay. Thank you for being so honest, and sharing all of that, because there's some I don't have kids, but there is a lot that I definitely can, like resonate with, from when I grew up. I remember like, I used to have all the teen magazines, and I would rip out the exercise pages. And I would like look at the girls. And I look at like, I look at kids now. And I'm like, I was never that thin even...` my parents made fun of me. They said they could tell when I grew because I would have tan lines where my roles were as a baby, you know? And, and so I just I too started like dieting early on, and, and doing terrible things that now my stomach is reminding me like you didn't treat us well, when you were younger. And we are dealing with those things. And I wanted to talk about that. Because I think when we punish our bodies, we're so obsessed with like, what we look like on the outside. It stops us from doing our things that we are here on this planet to do so can you think of like, can you think of a time when you're dieting and your dysmorphia and your eating disorders were keeping you from actually going after your dreams?

Giselle Schroer  

Yeah, so we I got pregnant with my first son pretty easily, we didn't have to really try very hard. Even though I I know at that point, my life, I wasn't at a very healthy time, I still didn't have any issues I was younger too, when we started trying to get pregnant with our second child just two years later, was when I started learning about all of the damage I had done to my body. So you know, I started going to doctors, like why am I not getting pregnant, we went through a year of secondary infertility where I just wasn't able to get pregnant and diagnosed with hypothalamic amenorrhea, which means that you have a loss of the menstrual cycle. And this can happen from a lot of different reasons. But for myself, and for a lot of women, it happens when you are under eating. When you were over exercising. It's very prevalent in the health and fitness industry with fitness instructors, things like that. So anyway, so I you know, I discovered I had that and not even when you learn that you have that doctors don't necessarily say like, you need to not exercise as much or you need to eat more food, they just kind of like tell you, you know, oh, you have this like maybe gain a little bit of weight. So I kind of started doing my own research and reading about, you know, people who had it and other health and fitness instructors who had it and learning that, you know, the reason I had it was because I was doing the damage to my body and all of the damage I'd done. So I gained some weight, started eating a little bit more food, but still was having issues and I started having miscarriages and doctors weren't really diagnosing it as anything. And this is where it became my own health advocate and really dove into learning, like, what was going on. It was from a lot of what I had done, it was because of how I wasn't fueling my body. But I did see specialists, saw a naturopath - who kind of helped me to learn that like, you know, food is going to help me to heal my body. Nutrition is number one, and you know, is a huge mindset shift for me. And in that time, I kind of learned a little bit about macronutrients nutrition, and how to balance your body, your food through proteins, fats, and carbs, and how to eat more food. And that it's okay to weigh more. Right?

Lesley Logan  

Yeah. (Giselle: Yeah) That's so this is, I mean, thank you for sharing that story. Because I feel like there's, I know for sure, because I know some of our listeners so well, but that this is a story that thinks they can go that happened to me too. And I think it's so interesting, because especially in the in the States, you know, it's like, every time we have a doctor's like, we'll lose 10 pounds. And that will, you know, but no one actually talks about how to do that healthier or what that even looks like. And then we're so conditioned to seeing some foods is good. And some foods is bad that you know, or did like, just go under the calories, and then you'll be fine. And it's like, Yeah, well, you can eat a whole bag of M&M'S® and be under calories, and you're not going to be fine. Actually, like, that's not so great for you. And so, I just really appreciate you sharing that story because you love your kids so much, it was so important to you to have them in to actually find out that by not eating healthy, you was causing issues there for you. Thank you. Um, I wonder though, you know, going from someone who, who was, you know, under eating over exercising, to then find all this information, becoming an advocate. And then also you've ended up becoming, you know, you're certified in this your training, this is how you do. How, I feel like there had, what was your mindset shift? What were you telling yourself, because I feel like going from someone who is maybe, not maybe, definitely under eating, over exercising, to like, now I'm, this is how... I preach and teach and, and this is how I'm trying to live my life. It can't be easy to just switch like that, like, what were you having to tell yourself? What was the mindset shift there that you had to go through?

Giselle Schroer  

Yeah, yeah. So I've never been that girl that could like eat whatever she wanted, you know. And a lot of that does come from the fact that I was under eating for so long, so that my metabolism adapted. And I see that so frequently in women that I coach and women just in general, that they're under eating, you know, eating because we've told eat 1200 calories, eat 1500 calories. I mean, I'm 5'10"... twelv, 1200 calories to me as well below my BMR. And so my metabolism had adapted. And so just looking at a piece of cake, how it gain weight because my metabolisms running at 1200 calories. And anytime you eat over that, your body just stores it, right, because you don't need it. But I want it to be that girl who could go to dinner, go out to dinner, you know, and order a regular dinner and then order dessert. I love wine. I love chocolate chip cookies, I love chocolate. But I always felt like you know, if I ate those things, had to go burn it off in the gym the next day, you know, like punish myself right away. So I longed for it, I wanted it. And it got to a point as we're you know, it's a gradual mindset shift for sure. And that's really what I coach, in that, you know, it's okay to eat the cake. We balance that with some other foods. So you know, if you want the cake, maybe you're not ordering the hamburger and fries, right. So learning how to kind of have that checks and balances approach with nutrition to where, you know, the majority of the time, I'm fueling my body with good, healthy foods that I know are going to make me feel good. But then I can also eat the cake if I want it or the chocolate chip cookie, I can have the wine. I'm just going to kind of maybe balance it out with something else. So it's a process definitely it's a mindset shift. It definitely took me a while. But now that I'm here, yeah, I have my wine if I want it and my cookies, you know, I just kind of learn how to make it fit within my daily nutrition.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, so was there, so you were you are kind of basically you are just figuring out like, what is the balance and be, and trusting that process... And (Giselle: yeah), and how how did you trust that process? Because I know for me, you know, I was underweight for too long. And you get so many compliments, especially in LA. (Giselle: yeah) You get tons and like then when you start gaining weight noone... that compliment, it's like not even compliments... It's like, the side eye. And and so it had, it was really hard for me. I will be honest, like I had to decide myself like this is actually fine. Like when you look at pictures of yourself. You look really good now, before you looked really sick. You look really good. I had to like tell I had to give myself a pep talk. Like was our pep talk you gave yourself because you were having to change literally how you lived your life.

Giselle Schroer  

Yeah, it's funny you say that because, you know like you just then people would tell me all the time when I was thin, like, "You look so good," you know. And in reality, I'm over here like burning myself into the ground. And that just kind of fed into it, right, it feeds into it. And now when I post side by side pictures of myself, you know, years ago when I was anorexic and bulimic and over exercising compared to now people say, "Oh, my gosh, you look so much better now." But nobody stopped me on the side of the street right now saying, "You look amazing," right? Yeah, so we do kind of, first and foremost, I hired a coach that could help me to support me and guide me and I think that's really important is, if you don't have somebody in your corner, or somebody that as educated or somebody that knows your story, to hire, you know, reach out for help, whether that be a nutrition coach, a personal trainer, a therapist, you know, making sure that you have somebody in your corner who's also going to help you and support and guide you. And then unfollowing and getting rid of the negativity in your life, like you don't need to follow these people on social media that are trying to portray this perfect thing or that don't make you feel good, you know. So not, it's kind of like with food, where I say, just remove it, and you won't be thinking about it. It's with images and body images, if you're seeing things that aren't making you feel good and remove it, and you won't be focused on that, you'll be focused more on yourself.

Lesley Logan  

Oh, my gosh, that is brilliant, that is the best because it is true. Like what we see, we like start to see evidence for we believe. And so it's like, if and if we don't curate our own feed, to giving us the information that we want to be believing it's going to just keep us in the end. The other thing, I think you for sure, that's a great hot tip. For sure, save that one, everyone will come back to that for towards the end, we get to there are action steps at the end. But you know, I'm with it. Let's, let's talk about food for a bit. So everybody is different, and everyone can eat differently. And some people can like eat the cake. And that's not me. But that's not my family either. So I eat the cake. But you know, it's I'm not gonna Yeah, my husband eats a pizza, his abs are more defined. And you know, so it's all in balance. But are there certain foods that people can be thinking about if they're trying to have more energy, more confidence even? Like, is there a food that we should be like considering like putting more of our diet if we're trying to like actually have the energy to do the things we want to do in this life?

Giselle Schroer  

Yeah, yeah, I think a lot of people don't even notice that they don't have the energy that they can potentially have. And feel as good as they can potentially feel until they start changing their diet and their lifestyle a little bit. And so I think just people don't know how good they can feel, right. And so yeah, just focusing, you know, on eating a lot of whole foods and really balancing your food. And that's what I found in macronutrient tracking. And that's what I really coach, you know, my clients and other women and doing is learning how to eat the right amount of macronutrients, that's your protein, your fats and your carbs, for your particular body and your goals. So like you mentioned, your husband, you know, he, his macronutrient profile is completely different from your macronutrient profile, right. And a lot of us are just eating like, our neighbors, or our best friend is or whoever we see on Instagram telling us to eat this certain way, where we should be eating for our individual goals and our individual lifestyle. So really learning, like, what you need in order to fuel your body in terms of protein, fats and carbs, is super important. Because if you're not an athlete, you might not need as much carbs as like somebody who's an endurance athlete. Right? (Lesley: Right) Um, if you're not, if your goal is not to build muscle and tone up and shed fat, then you might not need as much protein as somebody who has that goal. If you're a vegetarian, you might not be eating as much protein. So your individual macronutrient profile is super important to know. Because then you can really fuel your body for its optimal potential that is with energy, sleep, stress, you know, physique, performance, all of those things come when you're really balancing your nutrition.

Lesley Logan  

Okay, so a couple things just to because in case somebody is listening, they're like, what is macro nutrition? (Giselle: Yeah.) And also, can we go back to the BMR? Because you said BMR, and I was like, "Uh huh." But just in case, some of us are not trained in it. So anyone listening might not know what the BMR is and what macro nutrition it can you just like, give a little like one on one on that?

Giselle Schroer  

Yeah, yeah. So everybody has a baseline of calories that they need to be intaking on a daily basis just to like live, to lie in bed, to breathe, to barely even to breathe just to lie there until like actually live. That's your basal metabolic rate. So that's what BMR stands for. And unfortunately, a lot of people are eating below that because like I said, I'm 5'10" my BMR is like 1500, and for a long time I was eating, you know, 1200, 1100 calories. So it's well below your BMR. And what happens when you eat below that is your metabolism just adapts. And then anytime you eat over that, you know you gain weight, right? Because you don't need those calories. So, so basically, you know, macronutrients - protein, fats and carbs - everybody's eating those. That's just what makes up the calories of our food. So when you look at a nutrition label, and you see the calories, if you look down, it'll say fat, protein and carbs. And those grams are what makes up the calories of the food. So like you said earlier, you know, you could eat a bag of m&ms and still be under calories. You could eat all of your calories in doughnuts, right? But is that going to really help you feel your best? Probably not. Right? So we want to kind of balance those macronutrients, in terms of making sure that we're fueling our body for optimal potential.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, yeah, I, the we were on our road trip. And there was a place in Moab that had these vegan, gluten free doughnuts with icing and I was like, we're totally buying that doughnut. I'm just only gonna have a bite. Because if I have the whole thing, I'm gonna be like crashing on my hike, but I could have a bite. And then we just wrapped it back up. And then later in the day, after we had this amazing dinner, I had another bite. I was like, this is so much fun. Like, there should be ice. I seen doughnuts everywhere, if you know, but I would say it took me a long time to not eat the whole donut. Like cuz I but I learned because it's not because I it's bad. It's just that I don't feel good after the whole thing. I just want that. I have a sweet tooth. Raise your hand if you have. And I crave it. I was like, if I just have a little bite. Is that enough? And it really was, and and it took a while. But yeah, it's you. It's all about the balance on what you need. So thank you for breaking that down. Because I do think that some people are like, "Oh, yeah, I need to have whole foods. But what what does that mean?" And I need to know it. And I think it's because we, you know, depending on what you're advertised, or what you see, you know, so many people are eating, they're living their life off, like shakes for meals, and you know, and that's also makes it very different when they go to eat real food, how their body adjusts to that. So, so thank you for sharing that. When it comes to you know, especially I think since most women, most people listening are women. And when it comes to eating, you know, as far as you have two boys and then you also have your, your partner, your husband. And so when you you know, I think a lot of people, they You said you can't eat like your neighbor, you know, how does someone? How do you? How do you find? How do you, Giselle, like, eat for yourself versus like... it's so tempting to maybe eat wha... the way everyone else's eating around you. Because I think that a lot of people feel hung up or like people are gonna judge them or people are gonna look at them. What are they gonna say? So how do you handle that so that you continue to fuel yourself?

Giselle Schroer  

Yeah, I think that's a good question. Because, yeah, I mean, like you said, you see your husband eating a whole pizza. It's like, "Oh, I can eat that, too." I think it's really being in tune with your body. And like I said, a lot of people don't even realize how good they can feel until they start fueling their body properly. A lot of my clients, once we've started tracking our nutrition for several weeks, several months, we pay so much attention to non-scale victories and not just the scale, like how are we feeling? How are we sleeping? Once you become in tune with those things, and relate that to your specific macronutrients, you realize, like, wow, I feel so much better when I'm eating for me and the food that makes me feel good, and not trying to follow keto, or, you know, whole 30 or drinking a shake for dinner, because my neighbor is drinking that for dinner or selling that. And that's what I thought, you know. So I think it's really like getting into it and trying and being consistent with it and paying attention to your body. It's knowing your body and paying attention to it. You know, I'll say it again. It's like we don't even realize how good we can feel until we start feeling good.

Lesley Logan  

So let's talk about that non-scale victory. I love that. So just so everyone hears it's non scale, so I don't even own a scale. I don't weigh myself unless the doctor actually puts me on the scale. And sometimes I just say a number and hope that they like, keep going. Because it doesn't mean a lot. You know, like it's... I go what's off my clothes test, I got my energy test. What are some non-scale victories that people can pay attention to themselves and their own? You said sleep? What are some other ones?

Giselle Schroer  

Yeah, definitely. So yeah, I encourage definitely checking in with sleep stress levels, you know, how are you feeling? How are you handling your kids? Are you feeling like at your wit's end? Or do you feel like a little bit calmer mood, energy levels, how your clothes are fitting how your skin looks, how your hair looks, I mean, non-scale victories can really, really, really be I mean, so open range, because, again, we don't notice how we feel until how good we can feel until we start feeling better. We don't even really pay attention those things because we fixate so much on the scale, and once we kind of remove that and pay more attention to How we're feeling on the inside out better digestion, less bloating, less water retention, less inflammation, you know, like, we live in such a constant inflamed state that we don't even again, notice how good we can truly feel until we start feeling like, wow, I'm not as sore after my workout as I was, every time a month ago, you know, or I have more energy during my workouts. I'm lifting heavier. All of those things are non-scale victories. And so, so, so important to focus on the scale is a measure of progress. Sure. But it's not the only measure of progress. And to be honest, it's not the best measure of progress.

Lesley Logan  

Right? You are, you're so spot on. And because I think we also, we don't realize how good we can feel because we also didn't realize when we started feel bad. (Giselle: Yeah) Like, it's becomes such a... you don't actually go Oh, like, you have one day where you and then you have the next day where you're stressed out, and it keeps going. And so I find, especially for women, they're doing so many things for so many other people, and they're so last on their list. For sure, they don't realize how good they can feel until they start feeling that way. Like the bet and I feel like, women especially have so much power in them. Like there are studies that show that like when women make money, they give back to the community, like women take care of the community. Right? So what are what are some ways that like, the simple ways that people can can actually start tracking? And like, what isn't feeling so great, that's non-scale? Like? Should they before they work with you? Do you have them like track? Like their sleep? Like, what are some things that can start to focus on that they could maybe make some changes on to feel better?

Giselle Schroer  

Yeah, yeah, I encourage all of my clients and anyone in general to start journaling, I know it can seem so overwhelming, but just a journal about how you feel in the morning and how you feel at night. You know, each day and just kind of really start paying attention to your body, you know, how was your workout, if you feel like you have a moment of crazy stress, where you're yelling at your kids reflect on that, like, stop and reflect on what's going on. I think, like you said, we're just like constantly pulled in different directions and constantly stressed and constantly just go go go that we don't ever stop and reflect. So I think it's a really good idea to you know, whether that be on your in your notes app, or in an actual journal, just making note of how you're feeling. A lot of it revolves around your menstrual cycle too, your hormones, you know, change during your cycle, they change as we age. And so I use a tracking app with my hormones with my menstrual cycle, and where you can put notes in it based on how you're feeling at different times during the month. And that just kind of makes you again, be more aware of your body and I think that's super important. And then in terms of nutrition, like anybody can download a food diary tracking app onto your phone, if you just want to get a general idea of like, what you're eating, and if it's affecting how you're feeling. And so if you start tracking your food, and you're noticing, like, Oh my gosh, today, I had 220 grams of carbs, and 80 grams of sugar, you know, and I crashed at five o'clock in the afternoon, or I was snapping at my kids, you know, that can 100% be in relation to what food you ate. So I think it's a great idea for anybody just to, you know, play around with it, track your nutrition and pay attention to how you feel in relation to the food you're eating.

Lesley Logan  

Yeah, cuz I mean, like, that's so great. Because I, sometimes I'll be like, I'll wake up in the morning, like, I am ready to take on the day, this is gonna be awesome. And then either I wait too long to eat lunch, or I didn't eat the right lunch because I didn't go grocery shopping. And so I buy like three o'clock, I'm like, well, this isn't working. And the reason I wanted to bring you on to talk about these things is I really want people to see that sometimes. The reason you're not able to achieve the goals or go after the thing has nothing to do with education you have has nothing to do with your motivation has nothing to do with. With any of those. It has everything to do with like probably what you're using as fuel for your, for your, for your system. And so, so I'm I love it's a simple, it's not me, it's not simple, but it's a great way to start just being aware like the cycle. And then also like, how you started the day, how you ended the day and what was was the fuel along the way. And you can really start to see the patterns there.

Giselle Schroer  

Yeah, and I think that's great, right there, what you said about the fuel, I think that's what we have to shift our mindset from - is that food is a way to lose weight, or a way to reward or punish ourselves or we eat when we're stressed or you know, when we're tired. And that food is fuel. It is the gas that we were putting into our tank and if we were putting crappy gas in our tank, we're not going to run efficiently and we're not going to work to our optimal potential. Whether that be you know, getting out there when playing with your kids or reaching whatever dream it is that you're chasing with your work. If you are fueling your body properly, yeah, you will have more energy to do those things and you will feel better and you'll have more confidence too.

Lesley Logan  

That's amazing. Okay, so Giselle what are you? What are you currently working on being it right now? Like, what's something that's like you're trying to go for in this moment?

Giselle Schroer  

Yeah, I mean, I think you know, through all the lessons that I've learned through the damage I've done all of that I just really want to reach as many women as I can and teach them that you know, you can, you can eat the healthy food and you can also eat the treats, you can drink the wine, you can have it all and still reach your goals and feel really good. I just really want to help women learn to live a sustainable lifestyle through diet and exercise and love and nurture their bodies. I'm a coach too, a whole body approach. So you know, we're talking sleep, stress, mindset, all of those things in order to just really make you feel as good as possible. So I'm just really trying to be the best coach that I can be that can help as many people as I can to feel really good because it feels good feel good, you know?

Lesley Logan  

Yes, it does. It does feel good to feel good. I that is such an awesome goal. I think again, just like there's if you help all those women feel really good about themselves and have the confidence and have the fuel in their bodies like just the power that each one of those women has in them to to change this planet is incredibly cool and and I know some people are like, "Lesley I'm freaking tired. I'm barely able to keep my eyes open to listen to this podcast with you and Giselle but I'm listening because..." you're really, like you really want to be it. It's maybe it's just for the day and like you have to start like with just today and so (Giselle: yeah), so first Giselle where can everyone follow you, like get to know you? Where where do you hang out?

Giselle Schroer  

Yeah, I'm on Instagram quite frequently, probably more than I should be like any other coach, right. giselle_schroer_, I'm always in my dm so feel free to shoot me a message there. I'm on Facebook at Giselle Schroer Health and Wellness and then my website giselleschroer.com where you can find information on all of my services. I have a group coaching program where I work with a majority a lot of women, helping them to learn how to track macronutrients and then I offer one on one coaching as well. So yeah, definitely check me out there.

Lesley Logan  

Amazing. And we'll put all of those in the show notes, y'all. It's really easy to see them because you might be like, How do you spell Schroer? (Giselle: Yeah, I know) It's okay. I have Lesley as a name and everyone spells it wrong. So like I've you know, it's but you know what, total side note, I went to Starbucks and you know, they never get your name correctly. But they put my name is Wesley It's been a long time since I've gotten a Wesley when I say my name, but everyone spells Wesley with an l e y. And so I'm tempted to say it's Lesley. It's Wesley with an L. It's Wesley with an L.

Giselle Schroer  

Well, you're better than me cuz I don't even tell him my real name at Starbucks. I give them my Starbucks name. So it does have a full different way.

Lesley Logan  

Wait, what's your Starbucks name? What's your Starbucks name?

Giselle Schroer  

Jen (Lesley: Oh, okay.) Even my kids know it.

Lesley Logan  

That's funny. But then I have to remember that. And that's, you know what I mean? Like, I remember the new name.

Giselle Schroer  

Yeah. There has been a few times where I'm like, they're calling this Jen girl and she hasn't come to get her coffee.

Lesley Logan  

I love that your kids know. Okay. So, um, Alright, so what everyone's waiting for, at the end of every episode, we actually I asked every guest, you know, what are some action steps and steps of prioritizing ourselves that we can take today? Because I think it's one thing to be inspired to be like, Yes Giselle, awesome. I'm gonna fuel myself I'm not I'm going to ditch the scale, I'm gonna work on these non-scale wins. And then it's like, life happens and their kids are screaming or their work is at them. So what are a few things that people can actually do right now to start, you know, feeling good about themselves and being it until they see it?

Giselle Schroer  

Yeah, yeah, I think first and foremost, it's important to learn, to love yourself, and to learn your own body and to stop comparing yourself to other people and trying to do what other people are doing. And just really start to stay in your lane and focus on you and love yourself, wherever you're at in your journey, what you you might have a goal to lose weight, or you might have a goal to, you know, build muscle, but you can still love yourself right now at this point. So I think first and foremost, it's super important to love yourself right now, wherever you're at in your journey. And then really just pay start paying attention to what you're putting into your body. You don't have to go out and make huge changes today. You don't need to do a whole diet overhaul or completely cut out carbs or, you know, jump on the next fad, fad diet bandwagon. You just start making small steps. Maybe it's eating more vegetables throughout the day, maybe it's increasing your water intake. Maybe it's starting to pay attention to how many steps you're getting and to gradually increase that you don't have to go from 3000 steps to 10,000 steps in one day. Start with a small increase you know go from 3000 to 500 in one week, and then increase to 4000. Just knowing that every single step, no matter how small is a step in the right direction is super important in every single journey. So

Lesley Logan  

I love that. I definitely know someone who's not drinking enough water. And I was like I was hearing people like to drink more water, drink more water. I'm like, What is more? And how do I do that? And like, how am I going to go from like having, you know, two water bottles a day to four water bottles a day? Like, you'd take some time and I really tried to do it in one day, you can't like your body has like, what are you doing to me? So I think those small people, it's probably hard people think, well, how is this helping, but like, you're right, this even a small tiny step forward is going forward. And and it's not about overhauling the diet overnight. It's kind of like, how do we eat maybe more vegetables? And every each day, and then how does that affect then? It's a domino effect, right?

Giselle Schroer  

Yeah, yeah, that compound effect, like one small change will affect you moving forward. So just make the change, just start small. Like I said, everybody starting somewhere, and no matter what your journey is, just again, and it's super important to just love yourself, no matter. You know, if you're on day one or day 100. Just stay in your lane and love yourself, no matter where you're at.

Lesley Logan  

And, you know Giselle I don't think anyone has actually put love yourself as the action step at the end so far in this podcast. So, which is (Giselle: It's important) it's so important. You know, it's like, you know, who I don't know who started up. But someone said, like, when you say like, when you break down the people you love, like how long until you put yourself on the list? (Giselle: Yeah.) And I was like, oh, huh. And I'm like the prioritize (Giselle: we should be number one) Right. I'm like the now I'm like, you have to prioritize yourself first. And I'm like, Oh, I you know, and also love that love that person that you're practising first. Like, how about that (Giselle: Right) We all need those reminders. Giselle love you. Love what you're doing, love your mission on this planet. And just (Giselle: Thank you) so grateful that the universe brought us together. Thank you for being here. Everyone, please do Giselle and I huge favor, and also the women around you by screenshotting this episode, sharing it to your Instagram tag Giselle Schroer and the be_it_pod and tell us what your takeaway was? What is the action step that you're going to take right now to loving yourself more, and also feeling yourself so that you can actually go after the things that you are on a mission to go after? And until next time, be it till you see it?

Giselle Schroer  

Thank you.

Lesley Logan  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And, follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!

Lesley Logan  

'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.

Brad Crowell  

It's written, produced, filmed and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell.

Brad Crowell  

Kevin and Bel at Disenyo handle all of our audio editing and some social media content.

Brad Crowell  

Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Brad Crowell  

Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all the video each week so you can.

Brad Crowell  

And the Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.