Beyond Your Number

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Beyond Your Number episodes

July 30, 2025 The Self-Regulation Path: How to Calm Down Before Conflict Blows Up
This episode is the third in our conflict mini-series, if you missed the last two, definitely go back and catch them! Two weeks ago, we walked through six steps for healthy conflict. Last week, we hit the self-sabotage pitfalls that derail it. And this week? We're laying out a step-by-step path for self-regulation, the actual work you can do before the conversation even begins.
Whether it's naming that you're triggered, taking 20 minutes to calm your brain, or journaling out what you really feel (instead of reacting from anger), this episode gives you a clear, practical roadmap. Conflict doesn't have to be chaotic and knowing your number just helps you navigate it better.
Oh, and yes... Scott’s Tots comes up. You’ve been warned.
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26 min
July 23, 2025What Gets in the Way of Healthy Conflict (And How to Spot It)
Last week, we laid out a six-step process for navigating conflict, but let’s be honest, sometimes the real struggle is what happens before the steps even start. In this follow-up episode, Damon and Kelly unpack the emotional landmines that often sabotage our best intentions in conflict.
From blame to emotional avoidance, they explore five self-sabotage traps and how each Enneagram type might fall into them. Whether you're a Nine trying to keep the peace, a One trying to make it right, or a Four deep in your feelings, this episode will help you recognize what’s getting in the way, and why it matters.
Stay tuned next week for the follow-up: how to move toward emotional self-regulation when conflict arises.
The five emotional traps that sabotage healthy conflict
How your Enneagram number may fall into specific pitfalls
Why “blame” is emotionally satisfying — and what it costs you
The subtle ways we numb, bury, or get stuck in unhealthy patterns
How recognizing self-sabotage is the first step toward change

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27 min
July 16, 2025Constructive Conflict: Turning Differences into Connection
Conflict doesn’t have to mean shouting matches or broken relationships.
This week on Beyond Your Number, Damon and Kelly dive into a topic that touches every relationship—conflict. They unpack how different Enneagram numbers experience disagreements, why some avoid it while others charge in, and how even small differences in opinion can feel like big battles for certain types.
Kelly shares a practical six-step roadmap for moving from destructive arguments to healthy, constructive conflict—including tips on picking the right time and place (hint: maybe skip the bedroom), why driving or walking might help guys talk, and how simply being heard can sometimes be enough resolution.
Whether you’re passive, aggressive, or somewhere in between, this episode is packed with tools to help you navigate disagreements without losing your voice—or blowing up bridges.

Set a time and place for discussion
Name the issue (on your own)
Explore possible solutions (on your own)
Discuss perspectives and solutions together
Choose a resolution together
Set a time and place to evaluate
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27 min
July 09, 2025How to Speak a Type 9’s Language (And Why “Sure” Isn’t Always Yes)
We’ve made it to the end of our Enneagram communication series—and it’s Damon’s turn in the hot seat as we talk all things Type 9!
In this episode, Damon wrestles with “Nine doubt,” shares why he’s skeptical about gentle communication styles, and admits he might be a secret One. Kelly unpacks what truly drives the Peacemaker’s calm exterior, and why the word “sure” doesn’t always mean agreement.
Together, they explore how Nines communicate, how to draw out their hidden opinions, and the lifelong challenge of choosing between peacekeeping and peacemaking. It’s equal parts insight and laughs—and a perfect wrap-up to this series!
Damon confesses his “Nine doubt” (and wonders if he’s really a One)
What “sure” actually means when a Nine says it
The difference between peacemaking and peacekeeping
Why decisions—even small ones—feel like conflict to Nines
How Nines can practice healthy conflict and assertiveness
Journaling, Netflix, and Damon
Kelly’s tips for drawing out a Nine’s true thoughts and feelings
The hilarious story of Damon’s fireworks plan
“What Nines want you to know”—straight from Damon himself
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27 min
July 02, 2025How to Speak a Type 7’s Language (And Say ‘Wow’ Before ‘How’)
Double-booked calendars, fast-talking optimism, and more ideas than minutes in the day…welcome to the world of the Enneagram 7!
In this (slightly turbo) episode of Beyond Your Number, Damon and Kelly explore how Type 7s approach communication, why they’re magnets for new experiencesand how to keep up without getting lost in the whirlwind.
Why “yes” is a 7’s favorite word
The line between healthy optimism and escaping reality
How to invite a 7’s input and why it matters
Practical ways to communicate without overwhelming them
The secret sauce: saying “Wow!” before “How?”
Whether you’re a 7, love a 7, or just wonder how they stay so upbeat, this episode is packed with laughter and real-life insights to help every personality connect better.
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21 min
June 25, 2025How to Speak a Type 8’s Language (Without Getting Run Over)
What’s it like to talk with a Type 8? Passionate. Direct. Powerful. And sometimes, intense. In this episode, Kelly shares from her own experience as a Type 8—what works, what doesn't, and what eights most need from you in communication. Damon helps us see how that energy can feel to others, especially when it gets misunderstood. Whether you're an Eight, love one, or work with one, this conversation unpacks the heart behind the boldness and the vulnerability behind the strength.
Episode Highlights:
Why directness is a strength—but also a challenge—for Type 8s
Kelly shares how texting “OK” nearly caused a crisis
The difference between being blunt vs. being clear
What Eights really mean when their volume goes up
How to hold space for a powerful personality without backing down
Why protecting people and causes drives how Eights communicate
How to gain trust and connection with a Type 8 (and what breaks it)
Damon’s reminder: “Don’t match intensity—just be yourself.”
What Eights want you to know but won’t always say out loud
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28 min
June 18, 2025How to Speak a Type 5’s Language (Without Forcing Small Talk)
Type Fives are thoughtful, observant, and incredibly insightful—if you give them the space to speak. In this episode, Damon and Kelly unpack how Fives approach communication, why they avoid surface-level conversations, and what it really takes to earn their input and trust. If you’ve ever wondered what’s going on behind a Five’s quiet presence, this one’s for you.
In This Episode:
Why Type Fives value space, privacy, and logic in conversations
The strengths of Fives: listening, simplifying, and strategic thinking
How to communicate with Fives: clear expectations, emotional patience, and deadlines
The challenge of emotional expression and how Fives can grow
Real-life team dynamics and funny truths about meeting leadership
New here? Check out Episode 100 to hear how each Enneagram type handles change—and where this podcast is heading next.
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23 min
June 11, 2025How to Speak a Type 2’s Language (Without Losing Yourself in the Process)
How do you talk with someone who’s always giving, always helping, and always putting others first? In this episode, Damon and Kelly dive into the warm, people-focused world of the Enneagram Two — and why communication with them can feel like a hug, a therapy session, and a pep talk all in one.
Whether you are a 2 or love one, this conversation unpacks what motivates them, how to respond to their generosity, and why setting boundaries is key to real connection.
In This Episode:
The superpower of Twos: empathy, generosity, and relational radar
Why Twos ask “how are you?” — and really mean it
The danger of overextending: when helping becomes self-forgetting
How to communicate with a Two instead of being steamrolled by one
A growth path: pausing before saying “yes” and practicing self-care
New here? Catch Episode 100 to hear how each Enneagram type handles change — and how this series came to life.
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27 min
June 04, 2025How to Speak a Type 6’s Language (Without Spinning Out with Them)
How does an Enneagram Six communicate? In this episode, Damon and Kelly explore the loyal, thoughtful, and cautious communication style of Sixes — and how trust, safety, and preparation shape their voice. Whether you’re a Type 6 or trying to connect with one, this episode will help you understand what’s behind their questions and what they need to feel secure.
In This Episode:
The superpower of Sixes: loyalty and preparedness
Why Sixes ask a lot of questions — and why that’s a strength
How to communicate with Sixes: clarity, consistency, and trust-building
Common challenges: anxiety about worst-case scenarios
A growth path for Sixes: learning to trust their inner guidance
New here? Check out Episode 100 to hear how each Enneagram type handles change — and why we changed the name of this podcast.
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24 min
May 28, 2025How to Speak a Type 3’s Language (Without Judging the Hustle)
How does an Enneagram Type 3 communicate — and what’s really going on beneath the polish? In this episode, Damon and Kelly dive into the world of the driven, adaptable, and image-conscious Three. Discover why communication for a 3 is all about connection, competence, and results… and how to speak their language without assuming they’re just putting on a show.
Whether you are a 3, love a 3, or work with one, this episode will help you affirm their value beyond performance — and deepen the kind of relationship they truly crave.
In This Episode:
Why 3s often shape-shift to meet expectations — and how it can look “fake”
The deep drive for success, and how it impacts how they speak and listen
How to affirm the 3 for who they are, not just what they do
The challenge of slowing down, showing weakness, and sharing feelings
A growth path for Type 3s: vulnerability, authenticity, and self-acceptance
🎧 New to Beyond Your Number? Start with Episode 100 to hear how each type handles change — and where this podcast is heading next.
Follow us on Apple Podcasts and leave a review:
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Follow us on Spotify and leave a review:
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25 min

About Beyond Your Number

From the publisher's feed

You're more than just a personality. Beyond Your Number is a conversational Enneagram podcast where Damon and Kelly dig into what makes people tick, and what to do with what you find.

We…