Bible Stories for Blasphemers

Gather round dear flock, as youth pastor Dan spills all the tea of the one Bible story They don't want you to know about, and Mariah's hopes of becoming a Christian convert are dashed. Talking points include Jared from twitter, the Golden Globes, and Jerrod Carmichael's latest joke. 

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This week on Bible Stories for Blasphemers, we return shamefully from many time-based errors with a chronologically-inaccurate episode. Then in the Pop Corner - wait, it's the Science Section this week? Okay, a lot has changed.

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Heeey, remember us?? Your favorite bible camp counselors are back! Check out this special episode where Dan shares their research on how humans across the world have celebrated the new year over time.

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This week on Bible Stories for Blasphemers, Dan talks about something in the Bible to do with numbers - a concept Mariah thought Dan would have learned a long time ago. Then in the Pop Corner, a HUGE BREAKING NEWS UPDATE and then Mariah discusses a rogue-like life sim video game she's been playing called Cult of the Lamb.

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This week, Dan tells the entirety of the Book of Leviticus. We learn about how if you try to do something nice for God but he doesn't like it, you'll probably get smited to shit. Also, Mariah teaches Dan about the origin of the human species.

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In this week's slightly depressing episode, we finally learn the epic conclusion of Exodus. Dan tells Mariah more details about the Arc of the Covenant, God tries to abandon the Israelites but instead tells them to kill everyone, and Moses becomes shiny.

If you can, please donate to the legal fund to hold the SPU board accountable: https://gofund.me/f8ef3398

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This week, Dan explains to Mariah the absolutely chaos and frivolity had by the nation of Israel while Moses was on Mount Sinai. Did the Hebrews betray God to start a new bovine religion? Did Aaron indirectly cause the deaths of thousands of his own people because of peer pressure? Who are we to judge? And honestly, God, what did you expect?

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This week, Dan is very tired. We talk about God's commandments for how to live, and about a very spooky and intimidating angel. Then, in the pop corner, we discuss Christian schools and, in particular, the sit-in protest at Seattle Pacific University.

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Sorry this one's late, folks! This week we tell the story of the ten commandments, and get extremely sidetracked due to our mutual lack of a science education. Then, in the pop corner, we discuss the new comedy special "Rothaniel." 

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This week, on a tight time crunch, we tell the story of bread falling from heaven and Moses having a very tiring day for his arms. Then, in the pop corner, we talk about Bible jokes and the new Florence & the Machine album. 

Find us on Twitter @BS4Blasphemers, or email us your Bible questions and corrections at [email protected].

You can also find Dan on Twitter @DanRogland or on Patreon at patreon.com/danrogland.

Special thanks for @HenryRogland for our intro, and to Bird Creek for our theme song, "Hooky With Sloane." 

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Send us an email at [email protected]