Bite Thy Thumb

You begged and pleaded… you wrote your local government officials… “please, make them stop releasing podcasts!” Well, guess what… nobodies care! Season 2 kicks off with the boys complaining about the Celtics but at least basketball is still good (0:00:39). You remember music? We talked about that (0:10:41). Norm MacDonald was funny so we remember that and shamelessly reenact his content (0:19:00). We hit that mindless groove strong as we finish off with Pokémon [the card game] (0:22:24), elite tier mall talk (0:27:16), Pokémon… the video game (0:32:10). Last, but certainly not least, the Bite Thy Thumb boys sing you to sleep and send you on your way (0:41:44).

The Bakers’ Dozenth episode of the Bite Thy Thumbs pod begins by navigating the fine lines between petty larceny, college meal plans and someone’s dad’s credit card (0:04:10). Speaking of ugly midsections, the Pats draft McCorkle, a drastic reduction in tragic collegiate athlete stories, and many other NFL Draft storylines (0:27:59). We wrap up by discussing the perils of dynasty fantasy football (1:02:51) and looking forward to post-vaccine life and the pleasures that come with it (1:21:01).

Do do do, DODODO, DO, do! With the 12th episode, in the 2021 Bite Thy Thumb podcast, the boys select reviewing 4 tantalizing dynasty rookies and yep that’s our NFL draft analysis (0:01:56). Breaking down the various McCorkles of the QB landscape and a controversial conspiracy theory for the Niners pick at 3 (0:26:00). Baseball is all about cigarettes (1:00:22) and preparing for the worst with the Patriots’ draft (1:30:27).

We humbly begin episode 11 by shooting Julian Edelman’s career directly out of a cannon (0:00:49). Can’t believe it took this long, but we finally got a fiery Ethan vs Jarrett screaming match: do championships even matter?? (0:08:00). We cool off by going around the world in rap music (0:21:03) and breaking down ALL Six Flags [spoiler: the 4th flag is scandalous] (0:30:47). Congratulations, Wyoming, you killed our love for rap music (0:47:45). We wrap up by ruining food in ways such as Pizza burger (0:54:05), bagel ice cream clams (0:59:00), and Popeyes n Po’ Boys (1:02:35), and finally, an ode to Mickstape as we forget we’re podcasting and watch Jayson Tatum murder the Warriors on national television (1:12:40).

Boys. Beverages. B-minus podcast material. The IPA tasting episode has arrived in all its glory (0:05:20). Along the way we cover the horrors of hoop assembly (0:43:30), naming all 1 of our fans (1:09:30), Celtics centric group therapy (1:32:30), and finally, El Jameses’ Latin music corner (1:48:55). BONUS: I do a pretty buzzed top-40 radio host introduction for the greatest outro in podcasting, exclusively performed for the Order of the Torty Biters.

Despite all your prayers, wishes, and legislative measures, the boys are back for episode 9. We abolish the draft... AGAIN! (0:03:22). Ethan thinks the P in IPA stands for pond water, except ponds obviously aren’t real (0:30:15). Jarrett is a Jayson Tatum/Celtics apologist (0:36:16), LeBron and Lola Bunny are the best frontcourt duo in basketball history (0:41:34), Hawaii rap and our first Hawaiian bun sponsorship (0:48:51), and lastly, previewing Wyoming rappers and the IPA tasting episode (0:59:26).

Back by lack of popular demand, the boys return for episode 8, talking round-ball, specifically a few teams doing some swip-swaps of some player men (0:05:30). We move on to Dumb and Dumber.... but for once we aren’t talking about ourselves! (0:26:53). The Patriots are slightly less bad than they were last time we congregated (0:53:15). We wrap up the episode with Jimethan’s gaming talk corner before previewing next week’s Hawaii rap (1:43:45).

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to listen to 3 strapping young men sample Irish whiskey over the very podcast air waves being broadcast to YOUR smartphone? Wonder no more my friends (0:01:00). We take a break in between glasses 2 and 3 to analyze the greatest movie/TV characters of all time, from Thomas Shelby of Peaky Blinders to Tow Mater of Cars [who Ethan accuses of being named Tug Mater] (0:34:00). After finishing our scotch, we discuss brave Texans smoking out the bees (1:23:00), lying about early childhood memories (1:38:47), finally hitting an unsavory random rapper assignment (1:49:05), then talking Idaho rap and previewing our next state: Hawaii (2:14:18)

Episode 6 opens up with the boys helping Jarrett pick a new baseball team for the 2021 season (0:02:15) and revisiting the Astros’ cheating scandal (0:11:25). We have a guest appearance from our pal Drake, who stops by the studio. Just kidding, but we did talk about him (0:17:08). We ride out into the sunset to the tune of painfully reliving adolescent haircut phases (0:36:50), some extended Celtics’ sadness (0:46:15), Alaskan rap report cards (0:52:10), and eventually ride directly into the sunset, exploding into oblivion [to the sound of us previewing Montana rap and the whiskey tasting episode next week] (1:01:13).

Blasting off episode 5 with a flashback to James’ wild night of unrequited love, the big city, grand theft auto and mostly getting robbed (0:01:00). Jarrett confesses to committing NASCAR (0:14:50) before getting sad about the Celtics (0:29:50). We can confirm OK rap is o-kay rap and decide to schedule Alaska for next week (52:12). James and Ethan are briefly permitted to “get their Pokémon on” to wrap up the evening (1:00:57).