Blended Family Breakthrough

Do you ever wonder about your future relationship with your kids and step-kids?

The truth is, you're laying the foundation for that future relationship now.  Each interaction with your kids either builds ups, or erodes, the future you really want.

One of the things that threatens that future relationship can be summed up in one word:  Parenting.

Over the years, we've discovered that our parenting can tend to get over-focused on correction and direction.  While both of those are important, it's critical that they are counter-balanced with interactions that build our kids sense of security, value, acceptance and self-worth.

You might be surprised to discover there are 5 practical areas  where you can positively affirm your kids - and this can build motivation toward improving habits, behaviors and attitudes.

In this episode we'll share all 5 areas and some of the challenges we've had over the years offering positive affirmations for our kids - especially when they failed to meet our expectations.

You'll Discover:

• The power of positive affirmation in parenting
• How positive affirmation can ease tension and build relational connection while blending
• 5 practical ways to appropriately affirm kids
• Why positive affirmation is critical - especially when a child's behavior is less than positive

Resources from this Episode:

• Article from Psychology Today:  Are We Overpraising Our Children? 

Episodes to Help Build Parenting Skills:

• Episode 4:  Can You Overcome Your Parenting-Style Differences?
• Episode 13: How to Parent as a Team in Your Blended Family
• Episode 63:  5 Strategies to Help You Get United - Even When You Disagree 
• Episode 73:  4 Simple Principles for Setting Healthy Boundaries with Kids
• Episode 74:  How to Develop Appropriate and Effective Consequences that Empower Responsibility

Ready for some extra support?

We all need some extra support along the blending journey — we're here to help.  You can connect with us for a free coaching call to see how we might help you experience more clarity, confidence and connection in your home.  Schedule your free call here:  https://calendly.com/mikeandkimcoaching/freesession

Subscribe or Follow the Show 

Are you subscribed or following the podcast yet?  If not, we want to encourage you do that today so you don't miss a single episode.  

Click here to subscribe in Apple Podcasts

Click here to follow on Spotify

Leave a Review in Apple Podcasts

We would be so grateful if you left us a review over on Apple Podcasts too. Your review will help others find our podcast — Just click here to Review, select “Ratings and Reviews” and then select “Write a Review”.   Thank you, we really appreciate your feedback!

Suggest a Topic or Ask a Question

Would you like us to discuss something specific or answer your question on the show?  Let us know!

We've made it easy.  Just click here:  https://www.mikeandkimcoaching.com/share

Ready for some extra support?

We all need some extra support along the blending journey — we're here to help.  You can connect with us for a free coaching call to see how we might help you experience more clarity, confidence and connection in your home.  Schedule your free call here:  https://calendly.com/mikeandkimcoaching/freesession

Subscribe or Follow the Show 

Are you subscribed or following the podcast yet?  If not, we want to encourage you do that today so you don't miss a single episode.  

Click here to subscribe in Apple Podcasts

Click here to follow on Spotify

Leave a Review in Apple Podcasts

If you’re feeling extra helpful, we would be so grateful if you left us a review over on Apple Podcasts too. Your review will help others find our podcast — plus they’re fun for us read too! :-)  Just click here to Review, select “Ratings and Reviews” and then select “Write a Review” — let us know what your favorite part of the podcast is.  Thank you, we really appreciate your feedback!

It's the most wonderful time of the year!

Or is it?

The holiday season is upon us and we all hope for something wonderful in our blended family this year.  But for many of us, the holidays might bring up dread instead.  

Why?  Simply because — well, it just isn't simple for stepfamilies!

The holiday season for many of us seems to create challenges.  Negotiating with the Ex, with the kids, and with each other can be stressful.  Relational tensions can escalate, dashing our hopeful expectations.  

Then disappointment sets in.  It can be frustrating, to say the least.

Kids in blended families often struggle too.  All kinds of frustrations and emotions get triggered for them.  Maybe you've noticed one or more of your kids distancing themselves or acting out in unexpected ways.

There are no easy solutions — this stuff is tough!  But you can approach the holidays proactively.

In this episode, we're sharing 10 practical tips that will help you navigate the blended family holiday season with intentionality.  You'll set your family up to experience something new (and maybe even wonderful) this year! 

You'll Discover:

• Tip 1:  Examine and readjust your expectations
• Tip 2:  Plan ahead with Your former spouse around schedules
• Tip 3:  Inform the kids of the plans they can expect
• Tip 4:  Create stability & connection for all the kids
• Tip 5:  Utilize the 5 Love Languages to fill emotional tanks
• Tip 6:  Discover what traditions are really important to the kids
• Tip 7:  Involve the kids in the preparation process
• Tip 8:  Keep your focus on gratitude
• PLUS 2 Bonus Tips that'll help you to keep your expectations realistic,  minimize disappointments, calm the chaos, and experience more joy!

Resources from this Episode:

• Article by Ron Deal: How to Cook a Stepfamily
• Article by Ron Deal:  Family Meetings: A Tool for Problem Solving
• Episode 95 - Do You Dread Negotiating Schedule Changes with your Ex?
• Episode  14:  3 Helpful Steps to Overcome Your "Perfectionistic" Ideals and Disappointments 
• Episode 69:   How to "Blend" Your Holiday Traditions in a Practical Way 
• Episode 36:  How to Change Your "Stories" and Grow Connection
• Episode 71:  How to Help Kids Cope with Painful Holiday Disappointment
• Blog article: How to Minimize Disappointment In Your Blended Family
• Resources for 5 Love Languages:  
  • Episode 85 - How to Uniquely Build More Love and Connection in Your Blended Family 
  • Book:  Building Love Together in Blended Families by Gary Chapman & Ron L. Deal

Suggest a Topic or Ask a Question

Would you like us to discuss something specific or answer your question on the show?  Let us know!

We've made it easy.  Just click here:  https://www.mikeandkimcoaching.com/share

Ready for some extra support?

We all need some extra support along the blending journey — we're here to help.  You can connect with us for a free coaching call to see how we might help you experience more clarity, confidence and connection in your home.  Schedule your free call here:  https://calendly.com/mikeandkimcoaching/freesession

Subscribe or Follow the Show 

Are you subscribed or following the podcast yet?  If not, we want to encourage you do that today so you don't miss a single episode.  

Click here to subscribe in Apple Podcasts

Click here to follow on Spotify

Leave a Review in Apple Podcasts

If you’re feeling extra helpful, we would be so grateful if you left us a review over on Apple Podcasts too. Your review will help others find our podcast — plus they’re fun for us read too! :-)  Just click here to Review, select “Ratings and Reviews” and then select “Write a Review” — let us know what your favorite part of the podcast is.  Thank you, we really appreciate your feedback!

We all know that we have plenty of things to be grateful for.  But how often do we slow down enough to discover just how much we really have?

Taking the time to "count your blessings" isn't just about appreciating life.  Research shows that choosing gratitude actually improves every aspect of your well-being. 

Gratitude changes your life.

We've come to realize that there are 3 areas where we can discover gratitude - one of them might surprise you.

In this episode, we'll share those 3 specific areas of gratitude and some of the things that we're personally grateful for! Oh, and by the way…

…one of those things we're grateful for is YOU — our listeners!  

You'll Discover:

• How gratitude can positively impact your own well-being and your family dynamics
• 3 specific areas of gratitude that will help you maintain your focus and avoid grumpiness

Resources from this Episode:

• Schedule a free coaching call
• The Gratitude Project from Family Life (Faith-based)
• Episode 11:  3 Hidden Strengths for Imperfect Blended Families 
• Episode 51: Overcoming Discouragement 
• Episode 69:   How to "Blend" Your Holiday Traditions in a Practical Way 
• Episode 71:  How to Help Kids Cope with Painful Holiday Disappointment
• Episode 84:   How to Cope with Sadness, Anxiety, and Longing while your Kids are Gone  
• Episode 99:  3 Tips to Help You Move Beyond Painful Guilt and Regret  

Ready for some extra support?

We all need some extra support along the blending journey.  Connect with us for a free coaching call to see how we might help you experience more clarity, confidence, and connection in your home.  Schedule your free call here:  https://calendly.com/mikeandkimcoaching/freesession

Subscribe or Follow the Show 

We encourage you to subscribe today so you don't miss a single episode.  

Click here to subscribe in Apple Podcasts

Click here to follow on Spotify

Leave a Review in Apple Podcasts

We would be so grateful if you left us a review over on Apple Podcasts too. Your review will help others find our podcast.   Just click here to Review, select “Ratings and Reviews” and then select “Write a Review”.   Thank you.

Suggest a Topic or Ask a Question

Would you like us to discuss something specific or answer your question on the show?  Let us know!

We've made it easy.  Just click here:  https://www.mikeandkimcoaching.com/share

Ready for some extra support?

We all need some extra support along the blending journey — we're here to help.  You can connect with us for a free coaching call to see how we might help you experience more clarity, confidence and connection in your home.  Schedule your free call here:  https://calendly.com/mikeandkimcoaching/freesession

Subscribe or Follow the Show 

Are you subscribed or following the podcast yet?  If not, we want to encourage you do that today so you don't miss a single episode.  

Click here to subscribe in Apple Podcasts

Click here to follow on Spotify

Leave a Review in Apple Podcasts

If you’re feeling extra helpful, we would be so grateful if you left us a review over on Apple Podcasts too. Your review will help others find our podcast — plus they’re fun for us read too! :-)  Just click here to Review, select “Ratings and Reviews” and then select “Write a Review” — let us know what your favorite part of the podcast is.  Thank you, we really appreciate your feedback!

You probably want to experience satisfaction, joy, fulfillment, and great relationships in your blended family.

But if you're anything like us there are some days where a sneaky little thought pattern creeps in.  It's subtle at first.  

A bit of envy because your friend seems so close to their spouse — you'd like that kind of closeness in your marriage.  Or a twinge of jealousy because the kids seem to talk about having so much fun at the other home with your former spouse.

Maybe we're the only ones, but that subversive thought pattern is all about comparisons — and it's a trap that will hijack your fulfillment and rob your joy.

We've both struggled with comparison traps in different ways over the years.  We've also discovered some very specific ways to escape the trap and discover the freedom to create a sense of satisfaction, joy, and fulfillment.  All of that has led to close, bonded relationships in our family — not always perfect — but really, really good.

In this episode, we're sharing the 4 simple tips that have helped us escape comparison traps and preserve our fulfillment.

You'll Discover:

• The negative impact of comparisons
• 3 areas where we tend to get stuck in comparison traps
• 4 Powerful tips to help you break free from comparison 
• How to experience more connection, joy and fulfillment in your blended family journey

Resources from this Episode:

• We mentioned the book:  One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp 
• Episode 105:  What Powerful Traits Do You Need to Successfully Blend and Stay United?

Ready for some extra support?

We all need some extra support along the blending journey — we're here to help.  You can connect with us for a free coaching call to see how we might help you experience more clarity, confidence and connection in your home.  Schedule your free call here:  https://calendly.com/mikeandkimcoaching/freesession 

Subscribe or Follow the Show 

Are you subscribed or following the podcast yet?  If not, we want to encourage you do that today so you don't miss a single episode.  

Click here to subscribe in Apple Podcasts

Click here to follow on Spotify

Leave a Review in Apple Podcasts

If you’re feeling extra helpful, we would be so grateful if you left us a review over on Apple Podcasts too. Your review will help others find our podcast — plus they’re fun for us read too! :-)  Just click here to Review, select “Ratings and Reviews” and then select “Write a Review” — let us know what your favorite part of the podcast is.  Thank you, we really appreciate your feedback!

Suggest a Topic or Ask a Question

Would you like us to discuss something specific or answer your question on the show?  Let us know!

We've made it easy.  Just click here:  https://www.mikeandkimcoaching.com/share

Ready for some extra support?

We all need some extra support along the blending journey — we're here to help.  You can connect with us for a free coaching call to see how we might help you experience more clarity, confidence and connection in your home.  Schedule your free call here:  https://calendly.com/mikeandkimcoaching/freesession

Subscribe or Follow the Show 

Are you subscribed or following the podcast yet?  If not, we want to encourage you do that today so you don't miss a single episode.  

Click here to subscribe in Apple Podcasts

Click here to follow on Spotify

Leave a Review in Apple Podcasts

If you’re feeling extra helpful, we would be so grateful if you left us a review over on Apple Podcasts too. Your review will help others find our podcast — plus they’re fun for us read too! :-)  Just click here to Review, select “Ratings and Reviews” and then select “Write a Review” — let us know what your favorite part of the podcast is.  Thank you, we really appreciate your feedback!

Imagine a time that co-parenting with your Ex is reasonable, collaborative, and maybe even pleasant.

Is that hard for you to imagine?

Often it feels like all the pain from the past and differing perspectives hijacks your ability to cooperate effectively.  And ultimately, when co-parenting breaks down it's the kids who pay the price.  The tension between their homes robs kids of just being themselves and feeling secure in both homes.

I wish we could give you the "magic formula" to perfect your co-parenting negotiations — but you and I both know that doesn’t really exist.

However, there are plenty of things you can do to create more peace and cooperation with your former spouse — regardless of how they choose to react.  And the more you focus on doing your part, the better things will be for your kids.

In this episode, we're sharing 5 steps you can take when the collaboration and communication in your co-parenting coalition seem to be breaking down.

You'll Discover:

• The best way to respond when negative emotions get triggered by a former spouse
• 5 practical steps to build cooperation in your co-parenting relationship - even when you disagree
• How to maintain self-control and stay focused on the wellbeing of your kids 

Resources from this Episode:

• Episode 112: 3 Dangerous Dynamics That Can Destroy Co-Parenting  - And Hurt the Kids
• Book:  Divorce Poison by Dr. Richard Warshak
• Episode 42:  Our Challenging Story of Parental Alienation - and 6 Tips For You
• Episode 33:  How to Cope with a Difficult Ex and Protect Your Kids (FREE Cheat Sheet Included)
• Episode 7:  Toxic Exes and Hurting Kids - 5 Steps that Help 
• Episode 8:  Toxic Exes and Defiant Kids - A Simple Strategy Against Lies and Slander 
• Episode 67 - The Best Co-Parenting Strategy That You Already Know
• Click Here to Schedule a Free Coaching Call 

Ready for some extra support?

We're here to help.  Connect with us for a free coaching call to see how you might experience more clarity, confidence and connection.  Schedule your free call here:  https://calendly.com/mikeandkimcoaching/freesession

Subscribe or Follow the Show 

We want to encourage you to subscribe so you don't miss a single episode.  

Click here to subscribe in Apple Podcasts
Click here to follow on Spotify

Leave a Review in Apple Podcasts

We would be so grateful if you left us a review over on Apple Podcasts too. Your review will help others find our podcast .   Just click here to Review, select “Ratings and Reviews” and then select “Write a Review” .  Thank you!

Suggest a Topic or Ask a Question:

Would you like us to discuss something specific or answer your question on the podcast?  Let us know!

We've made it easy…just click here:  https://www.mikeandkimcoaching.com/share  

Ready for some extra support?

We all need some extra support along the blending journey — we're here to help.  You can connect with us for a free coaching call to see how we might help you experience more clarity, confidence and connection in your home.  Schedule your free call here:  https://calendly.com/mikeandkimcoaching/freesession

Subscribe or Follow the Show 

Are you subscribed or following the podcast yet?  If not, we want to encourage you do that today so you don't miss a single episode.  

Click here to subscribe in Apple Podcasts

Click here to follow on Spotify

Leave a Review in Apple Podcasts

If you’re feeling extra helpful, we would be so grateful if you left us a review over on Apple Podcasts too. Your review will help others find our podcast — plus they’re fun for us read too! :-)  Just click here to Review, select “Ratings and Reviews” and then select “Write a Review” — let us know what your favorite part of the podcast is.  Thank you, we really appreciate your feedback!