Ahoy-hoy, Blue Ballers and welcome to Season Seven, proper. After fifteen minutes in heaven followed by 75 minutes in hell, NYCFC began their 2021 campaign with a two-one loss to a messy DC United side -- and your boys are here to break it all down. Jake & Trey talk offensive woes, defensive high points, sub impacts from some exciting new faces, and how to navigate the emotional rollercoasters of early-season matches.

THEN: a review of the Malte Amundsen and Brad Sims press conferences, and an obligatory Super League hot take or two. Plus: a lightning-quick preview of Cincy this weekend. Will our boys be able to give us a happy Home Opener? We'll find out this Saturday. And if you have time before then, throw on the podcast and take a little You time: you've got Blue Balls.

or, Glass Backwards;

Ahoy-hoy Blue Ballers, and welcome to another blue week in the weirdest NYCFC season in our brief, brief history. Trey and Jake recap TWO matches (okay, one point five) in an effort to explain how a team this rough-and-tumble with this much dysfunction has somehow pulled 13 points out of the last 15. Are the coaches right? Should the world of amateur punditry........ sit on it?

"NO!" Is the resounding cry from those of us who have nothing better to do! Get ready for some standard fare armchair analysis of tactics, psychology, and even the armchair analyst himself. In our Justin Egan corner we chat Tinnerholm's defensive acumen and Ring's hapless comitragic adventures on the wing. Then, some Talking Points and a precap of a New England Match with no Maxi and no Sands -- sounds like we may be in for some roughness. And speaking of Sands, rinse off before you go in the pool -- you've got Blue Balls.

Ahoy-hoy Blue Ballers and welcome to another week of NYCFC. Jake and Trey are full of it this week, chatting a double-recap of the first two matches since the end of the MLS Is Back Challenge and outlining why a 1-0 loss and a 1-0 win didn't actually look that different. Plus: the redemption of Ring, tensions on and off the field, and how NYCFC are creating (or not) meaningful chances. Plus, despite Trey's strong preference, we talk Messi rumors, and then unpack what the general strikes across leagues mean for MLS and specifically NYCFC. Stand in solidarity - you've got Blue Balls.

Salutations Blue Ballers, and welcome back to SOCCER IN THE STATES, from the two boys least likely to be thought of as a Voice For This Era. Jake And Trey recover from a blown precap ep to step up to the plate as we return to a hybrid league-tournament style play that both matters enormously and means absolutely nothing, which is both perfectly safe and a COVID hotbed, and which represents the best or the worst of sports in the United States depending on who you ask. Blue Balls are vast -- we contain multitudes, and we stroke out some of those multitudes on hot-mics from miles apart, breaking down the disappointing but now rather unsurprising one-nil loss to Philadelphia in the opening round of the MLS Is Back Challenge. Then: some talking points on safety, responsibility, tactics, coaching style, and the season ahead. Finally, a precap of a weakened match with Orlando that we have plenty of room to humiliate ourselves against. No need to wait in line at CityMD - you've just got Blue Balls.