Blue Balls NYCFC

Bienvenido a Miami blue ballers - but not yet! We have an episode before our boys hit the sunshine state, recapping the mad dash and lost points in Columbus. Lots of Q's hang over the boys at the moment and this episode is chock full of pondering them. We dress to the 9's to talk our 9's - are Heber and Talles enough to repeat the Cup? What silver linings are we to take from a tough road match vs. the Crew? Then - Will injury luck ever even out? Did the FO do enough during the transfer window? Lastly, can we cool down a hot Higuain yet again? We don't have answers, but we have a free hour of audio! Return your seats to an upright position, you've got Blue Balls.

The boys is back, bruvs. We talk the Taty true-true; with Castellanos netting goals for Girona, we're feeling his absence more than ever and break down all the ways we miss our golden boot boi. But that's not all: your boys chat the Americans teetering on the edge of greatness, the Brazilians ready to be unlocked by a Kleber word, and the Columbians (South and North American) ready to fuck us up when we go toe to toe with Columbus. Don't hog the covers -- you've got Blue Balls.

Buongiorno Blue Ballerinos, and thanks for joining us for another rowdy rambling of all things NYCFC. Jake couldn't make it this week (which is why this episode description is trash!), but there was too much to get to to not have a new pod for you folks so this time we brought out the big guns of first time long time Paul Harvey of The Outfield. First, we dug our spurs into Dallas, the 3-4-3, and what did and didn't catch fire in the Texas heat. Then a brief recap of a huge derby win against NJ, immediately overshadowed by Taty-ness. What is the impact of Taty meaning, and how the heck will we manage all this angst against Inter Miami? (We Will). All this and more (and Jake will be back soon we promise) so strap in with two fruit sno-cones - you've got Blue Balls.

After a manic 4-4 draw followed by a tight-wound 2-2, your boys in blue have had an emotionally draining week! Jake & Trey take the mic to review the blow-by-blow on the field for NYCFC's challenging matches against Cincinnati and Atlanta, in which we saw: the return of Heber as a point-forward, Maxi at his natural best and his natural worst, Johnson looking both flaccid and erect, a goal-hungry Taty, a hot-to-trot Chanot, and so much more; in other words, everything you could want from two NYCFC matches except six points. We've got it all here for you. THEN: are we going to get DP'd by our DP situation? Is Mitrita coming back, and why is he telling the press he wants to? And what does the Keaton Katastrophe mean for NYCFC, and for the man himself? And of course, a lightning-fast precap of New England action at Yankee Stadium this Saturday. Restock on Gold Bond and use that MeUndies code - you've got Blue Balls.

Three matches in, and what does the Nick Cushing era look like for NYCFC? It looks like -- a team that hasn't played in nearly a month trying to find its footing again! This and some even more obvious insights are exactly what you can expect from the return of Da Boys as Jake & Trey pop back into the hot seat and break down the draw-loss-loss of the last three matches. We touch briefly on reconnecting with old pals against Colorado, then break down the c(r)ushing loss against Red Bulls in the Open Cup, and do our best to stay chill unpacking a disappointing 1-2 loss against regional rivals Philly Union.THEN: Missives from the Soup as Chris Campbell gives us all something to hope for this summer! Mitrita: is he coming back? What does it all mean for TAM, GAM, DPs, and TPS reports!? And Gareth Bale, soccer's least motivated superstar, is coming to the city of angels! Are LAFC unstoppable? Only time -- and this podcast -- will tell. So take that ice-cold White Claw out of your lap and pop your airpods in: you've got Blue Balls.

Jake & Trey are stirred from their international break slumber by seismic news. The writing's all but on the wall -- there is a MORE than significant chance that head coach Ronny Deila will be leaving a vulnerable, post-championship NYCFC to go on that famous European trip for cigarettes. Before his departure is announced, we go back in time to trace the arc from early days to #DeilaOut to the Cinderella championship. And then: speculation time! Is the call coming from inside the house? And what plans can be made beyond 2022? Are we simply a stepping stone to greatness, or do we deserve a coach willing to make a commitment?? Plus: USMNT recap, including Sean John's outing between the sticks, and the most recent Taty rumors in brief. And then: a crowded upcoming schedule and what to look out for. And if the BIG ANNOUNCEMENT at the end piqued your interest, you have to wait no longer! Head on over to blueballs.myspreadshirt.com and grab your pod swag for the summer! But make sure you don't get a size too small -- you've got Blue Balls!

Two up, two down, and as your boys in blue extend their unbeaten streak to TEN in all competitions, Jake and Trey are back in the hot seat to piece it apart and put it all back together. A fascinating and dissectible open cup clash with the New England Revs gives us some glimpses of the talent all the way down in NYCFC's much-touted depth, as well as just how different the action is when the real patrons of NYCFC play are placed pleasingly on the pitch. We talk from worst to first, including highly telling performances from Jasson, Gray, Keaton, Santi, Taty, Heber, BARRAZA -- the whole nine yards. And then: the evergreen question, who's getting our Valentin and what are we getting in return? Rumors abound, but do they mean anything or are they so much vapor sizzling on the hot stove? Plus: Trey reminds us there's some big European thing this weekend. And: briefest of precaps before our first outing vs Minnesota in what feels like decades. Throw on your Memorial Day jorts, but be careful -- you've got Blue Balls.

Ya boys are at it again with another double recap -- the pace of play proves simply too much for our hardy little Blue Balls podcast but NOT for the Boys in Blue who bring back six points and +4 GD against Columbus and DC -- and Jake and Trey have the blow-by-blow. We get into the banter -- 195 minutes without a shot on goal, Gloster's latest round of pastries passes and pies, our superstar forwards, our superstar midfielders, our superstar defenders, our superstar GK, and start the whisper campaign nobody in the league is ready to hear: NYCFC's still the best there is. THEN: Chanot's contracts & corneas, Tinnerholm on the ones and twos, and some mostly-respectful Locker Room Talk. And we can't leave you without talking about upcoming Chicago and looming New England. Is 2022's NYCFC a treble level club? Or are we just taking it one week at a time? Don't strain too hard making up your mind - you've got Blue Balls.

*Warning - Pod gets crackly around the 57 minute mark. We don't know why! We were drinking! Sorry!* What’s good Ballers; a soggy nil-nil at Citi Field is our backdrop for this week’s Blue Balls, but before the bummer recap we got u with the 3-0 victory over a crafty but ultimately crackable San Jose and some highlight reel moments for Gloster and Gabriel, not to mention the consistently overperforming Keaton Parks and a little love for pod favorite Santi Rodriguez. And then: why couldn’t we do it again, and what does it say about the team without Taty? Plus, some eurochat! We holla at Haaland as the transfer rumors heat up to a near certainty. And of course, a little precap before we face down the mighty Rochester Rhinos in round 3 of the Open Cup. Adjust your strap and empty that fanny pack - you’ve got Blue Balls.

Folks, it's happening. With eleven goals in two matches, NYCFC is well and truly in MLS, and looking like the craziest mothers in the east by a country mile. Jake & Trey recap the gatling gun warfare of our 5-4 revenge victory over Toronto, talking advanced stats, key performances, and of course, favorite goals. Then: when your 10 could be two, what do you do?!? And a little Cameo Over-Under to take the edge off, before a San Jose precap that promises a potentially third chaotic week!! Did your pen break in your pocket?! Just asking, because you've got Blue Balls.