Boomer Banter, Caregiving, Purpose, Connection

Navigating the complexities of parenting adult children can be challenging, often filled with unexpected tensions and disappointments. Wendy Green and her guest, Denise Gliwa, delve into the evolving dynamics of parent-child relationships as children transition into adulthood. They discuss the crucial shift from a parenting role to one of support and understanding, emphasizing the importance of listening and resisting the urge to offer unsolicited advice. Denise shares valuable insights from her podcast, "Bite Your Tongue," highlighting the significance of building healthy relationships with adult children by respecting their autonomy and allowing them to lead their own lives. This episode is a heartfelt exploration of how parents can adapt and foster connections, even when their children are no longer dependent on them.

• As children grow into adults, parents must shift from direct involvement to supportive roles.
• It's essential for parents to recognize their adult children's autonomy and respect their independence.
• The concept of intergenerational stake explains why parents feel more invested in family relationships.
• Biting your tongue can be a powerful strategy for maintaining healthy relationships with adult children.
• Communication should focus on listening and understanding rather than offering unsolicited advice.
• Maintaining connections with adult children requires effort and understanding of their individual journeys.

Listen to Bite Your Tongue Podcast wherever you listen to podcasts.

Email Denise Gliwa at [email protected]

Become a member of Boomer Banter and join our virtual community meetings. Use this link to sign up.

Check out the comprehensive Clear Kit and use the code Boomer Banter at checkout to get 10% off.

Host, Wendy Green reflects on her harrowing experience during Hurricane Helene, which struck Greenville, South Carolina and Western North Carolina, and the challenges she faced in ensuring her family's safety and preparation. The discussion delves into the importance of emergency preparedness, particularly for older adults who may have unique needs and limitations.

This episode serves as a wake-up call, urging listeners to evaluate their own readiness for emergencies and develop a solid plan before disaster strikes, rather than scrambling at the last minute.

Wendy shares her personal stories and observations about the struggles many face, such as limited mobility and reliance on medical equipment, which complicate their ability to respond swiftly during emergencies. She advocates for proactive measures, such as establishing a go-bag filled with essentials, ensuring easy access to communication tools, and maintaining a supply of necessary medications.

By the end of the episode, listeners are left with a clear understanding of the importance of preparation, not just for themselves but for their loved ones as well. Wendy wraps up with resources for additional assistance, reinforcing the idea that while emergencies can be unpredictable, being prepared can significantly enhance one’s resilience and safety during such events.

• Prioritize Personal Health and Safety: Always think about your own personal well-being first. Have backup plans for medications and any electrical medical devices.
• Essential Go Bag Items: Pack a go bag with medication, documents, cash, a flashlight, sanitary products, a battery-powered radio, and extra batteries. Consider your pet and pack accordingly.
• Shelter in Place Supplies: Have enough water (a gallon per person per day), non-perishable food, a first-aid kit, and blankets if you need to stay at home during an emergency.
• Communication Plans: Establish a robust communication plan with regular check-ins and consider extra communication tools like landlines and satellite devices.
• Proactivity: Know where your local emergency shelters are and have a clear evacuation plan if the situation calls for it.

https://www.ready.gov/kit

https://www.fema.gov/pdf/areyouready/basic_preparedness.pdf

https://heyboomer.biz

The journey of healing through grief is not a linear path but a deeply personal and often unpredictable process. Wendy Green, host of Boomer Banter, explores this theme with guest Deborah Edgar, who shares her life story and the wisdom contained in her book "Good Grief." Deborah opens up about her challenging upbringing, the loss of her brother, and the trauma of losing her partner, John, during a joyful occasion. These experiences have taught her that grief must be embraced and processed, not ignored or hurried. She advocates for a holistic approach, incorporating practices such as journaling, morning rituals, and seeking support from a "trusted tribe." The discussion emphasizes the importance of allowing oneself to feel and express grief, recognizing it as a sacred and necessary part of life. Deborah's message is one of hope and resilience, reminding listeners that through grief, it is possible to find healing and even joy.

• Grief is not something you get over, but something you grow through by embracing it.
• Acknowledge and validate others' feelings, rather than dismissing them with common platitudes.
• Finding and engaging in activities that bring joy is crucial for soul care during grief.
• Discussing and remembering loved ones helps keep their spirit alive and supports healing.
• It's okay to feel both grateful and heartbroken simultaneously; this is part of the grief paradox.

Email Deborah Edgar at [email protected]

Support the Boomer Banter Walk to End Alzheimer Team.

Join the Boomer Banter Community. Click on Connect with Us.

Today we're discussing a critical topic—health screenings for older women. Joining us is Mary White, retired senior epidemiologist and adjunct professor at Emory Rollins School of Public Health. Mary brings over three decades of experience in disease prevention and cancer control.

We explore the latest guidelines for colorectal and breast cancer screenings, considerations for women exposed to DES, and the impact of factors like personal health history and environmental influences. We emphasize the significance of individualized assessments. Throughout our conversation, we focus on proactive health measures, the importance of early detection, and the societal responsibilities in creating healthier environments.

Stay tuned to hear Mary's insights, and don't forget to engage with our Boomer Banter community by signing up for our newsletter and supporting our Alzheimer's walk team. Let's understand how to navigate health screenings beyond just age and make informed decisions for a healthier future.

Screenings decisions are not just about your age: Individual health history, risk factors, and personal preferences play crucial roles in deciding whether to continue screenings beyond the age of 75.

Weigh the risks and benefits: Understanding the balance between the potential benefits and risks of continued cancer screenings in older age is essential for informed decision-making.

Societal impacts on our health: Addressing food deserts, environmental toxins, and other local initiatives can have a substantial influence on improving health outcomes.

A Cancer diagnosis is not a failure on your part: don't ever think that if you get a cancer that it is a on your part. It's too complicated for you to think that way

Subscribe: Don't miss out on future episodes of Boomer Banter. Subscribe to our podcast and sign up for our newsletter at heyboomer.biz for updates and relevant articles. Click on Connect with Us.

Join the Alzheimer's Walk: Support our team in the Alzheimer's walk on October 5th. Help us reach our $5,000 goal by donating or joining the team at act.alz.org/goto/heyboomer

Find Mary's article on colorectal screenings after 75 on Next Avenue.

National Cancer Institute

American Cancer Society guidelines

Let’s be honest. As Boomers we never thought we would get

old. We were the forever young generation.

And the truth is, many of us are still vigorous, vital, involved individuals.

But…the other truth is that arthritis is slowing us down. Knee and hip

replacements are being talked about. We’ve lost friends and family members. We

worry about whether we will out-live our money.

At Boomer Banter, we are on a journey to explore how to live vibrantly,

healthfully, with strong relationships and purpose as we age… without

sugarcoating or avoiding the uncomfortable, unexpected or the often uncertain,

challenges that aging presents.

Like any journey, we believe aging well requires preparation and vision. We

need the right gear and a trusted map.

Financial literacy will be our sturdy hiking boots. Good health will provide us

with balance and security. Friends are the fuel that keeps us moving forward.

And a sense of purpose becomes our trail map.

As a former corporate leader turned life and transition coach/entrepreneur, I’m

on a quest to navigate the journey of aging well – for myself as well as

everyone else who is walking the path alongside me – with honesty, candor, and

some fun.

With many years of “aging well” experience already (and plenty more to come) I

am here to tackle all the confusing, humbling and (hopefully) life-affirming

questions you’ve been pondering to help make the journey a little less rocky

and a lot more fun.

Let’s age well together. Tune into Boomer Banter and let’s gear up for this

next stage of our lives.

Estate planning is complex. Administering an estate after someone passes can take over 500 hours, especially if the person who passed did not have things organized.

In this episode, host Wendy Green gets into the complexities of estate planning and administering the estate with guest Adam Zuckerman. Adam is the founder of BuriedInWork. Together, they uncover the critical, often overlooked aspects of preparing for end-of-life matters in the digital age. Adam shares his personal journey of navigating his late father's estate, emphasizes the importance of comprehensive organization, and offers actionable advice for ensuring your loved ones aren't left in a lurch when someone passes.

Critical Steps Post-Death: Wendy and Adam outline the 56 steps to manage an estate after death, including notifying authorities, securing the deceased’s property, and caring for dependents and pets.

Digital Age Dilemmas: Managing digital accounts, passwords, and transitioning from mail to digital notifications adds complexity to estate management. Adam recommends having systems in place for organizing both physical and digital accounts.

Prepare Beyond Basics: Estate planning goes beyond just having a will or trust. Ensure you have all necessary documents like advanced directives, living wills, and organized digital legacies.

• Visit buriedinwork.com for free resources like the "Ask Three Questions" guide and an estate summary worksheet.
• Start organizing your estate now by documenting assets, updating beneficiaries, and informing family members of your plans.
• Utilize the "Clear Kit" to ensure all essential information is compiled and easily accessible to your heirs.
• Collaborate with professionals such as attorneys, CPAs, and doctors to ensure your estate planning is thorough and comprehensive.
• Actively engage your family or heirs in the planning process to ensure they understand your wishes and know where to find important documents.

• Share the Podcast: Help spread the invaluable information found in this episode by sharing Boomer Banter with your friends and family.
• Join the Community: Visit the heyBoomer.biz webpage and click on Connect With Us to become a part of the Boomer Banter community and stay updated on future episodes and events.
• Discount Offer: Take advantage of the 10% discount on the "Clear Kit" and games by using going to the BuriedInWork website and using the code "boomerbanter" at checkout.
• Support our sponsor: Check out all that CareLink360 has to offer to help you stay connected with loved ones who do not live close by. They also provide added security and many other resources to help your loved one. Use the code "boomer" on checkout for 5% off purchase

Mentioned in this episode:

CareLink 360

If you are a long distant caregiver would you like to easily connect, face-to-face with your loved one? The Digital Health Companion™ from CareLink360 is a safe, secure, and easy to use device that fosters regular social interactions.

Episode Overview:

In the 200th episode of Boomer Banter, host Wendy Green celebrates a significant milestone in the podcast's journey. Reflecting on four-and-a-half years of exploring aging well, Wendy shares the humble beginnings, growth phases, challenges, and lessons learned that have defined Boomer Banter. This episode is a heartfelt tribute to the community of listeners who have inspired and supported the show.

Takeaways:

Perseverance Pays Off:

Wendy's persistence through initial self-doubt, technical challenges, and slow growth periods highlights the importance of perseverance in achieving long-term goals.

Community is Key:

Building a strong, engaged community around shared interests and values can provide support, inspiration, and fulfillment.

Continuous Learning:

Embracing new skills and technologies is essential for growth and improvement, as is being open to learning from others in the field.

Purpose and Mission:

Clearly defining and staying true to your purpose can guide your work and keep you motivated through challenges.

Healthy Aging Practices:

Incorporating practices like forest bathing and focusing on health and wellness over appearance can lead to a richer, more fulfilling life.

Links:

Email Wendy at [email protected] to share your thoughts or suggestions.

Head over to Heyboomer.biz and click on CONNECT WITH US to stay updated with the latest episodes and more.

If you enjoy Boomer Banter, consider sharing it with friends and family, leaving a review, or supporting the show through Buy Me a Coffee.

Support our sponsor, Road Scholar, and get yourself booked for some fantastic travel.

Mentioned in this episode:

Road Scholar Great Global Giveaway

roadscholar.org/heyboomer

Episode Overview:

In today’s deeply thoughtful episode of Boomer Banter, host Wendy Green sits down with Catherine Marienau, a retired professor and an advocate for Compassion & Choices. Together, they delve into one of the most sensitive yet crucial conversations we can have with our loved ones: planning for the end of life. Exploring everything from hospice and palliative care to death doulas and advanced directives, Wendy and Catherine share personal stories and professional insights that underline the importance of open communication and careful planning. Whether you're navigating these waters yourself or preparing to help a loved one, this episode offers invaluable guidance and heartfelt perspectives.

Episode Highlights:

Hospice and Palliative Care: Catherine explains the emotional and practical support that hospice offers both patients and their families at no cost. Wendy and Catherine discuss the importance of choosing the right hospice, noting the differences between religious and for-profit organizations.

Role of Death Doulas: Moving beyond hospice and assisted living, Catherine introduces the concept of death doulas who provide additional spiritual and physical comfort, and often sit vigil with patients.

Historical Perspectives: They reminisce about past practices in communities where individuals naturally supported one another through the end of life, contrasting it with today's often isolating and complicated perceptions of death.

Personal Stories: Wendy and Catherine share their personal experiences with end-of-life planning, including the positive impact of having these discussions and the challenges when they are avoided.

Key Takeaways:

1. Start the Conversation: Planning end-of-life care and having these conversations early with family and medical teams can prevent conflicts and create meaningful interactions.
2. Advance Directives and Living Wills: Clearly outline and communicate your end-of-life wishes. Make these documents accessible to your loved ones.
3. Choose the Right Support: Understand the differences between hospice services and consider additional support from death doulas for spiritual and physical comfort.
4. Use Available Resources: Leverage resources like the "Compassion & Choices, End of Life Decisions Booklet" to guide your planning and conversations.

Links:

Explore Resources: Download the "Compassion & choices, End of Life Decisions Booklet" from the Compassion & Choices website. Order the "Finish Strong" book from their website as well.

Order "Fu*k, I'm Dead, Now What" from Amazon .

Connect with Catherine Marienau: Email or Website

Connect with Us: Subscribe to the Boomer Banter community and newsletter to stay connected and informed about aging well.

Check out Episode #289 on Women Over 70, where I was a guest.

Mentioned in this episode:

CareLink 360

If you are a long distant caregiver would you like to easily connect, face-to-face with your loved one? The Digital Health Companion™ from CareLink360 is a safe, secure, and easy to use device that fosters regular social interactions.

At your last physical, your doctor told you, "your blood pressure is too high," or "your A1C is too high," or "your cholesterol is too high." Then the doctor told you to cut back on sugar, salt, fats, or dairy. Add exercise to your life.

You may have left the office with good intentions, but lifestyle changes are hard!

In this episode of Boomer Banter, I sit down with wellness coach Jason Gootman, to delve into the transformative power of mindset and self-talk in making lasting lifestyle changes. Jason shares invaluable insights and practical strategies to help you develop new, healthy habits and sustain them. Whether you’re struggling to stay active, seeking ways to make workouts enjoyable, or curious about making your indoor environment more motivating, this episode provides robust, evidence-based solutions to guide you on your journey to better health.

1. Adopt an Experimental Mindset: Be open to trying different strategies and learning what works best for you. View challenges as opportunities for growth rather than setbacks.
2. Embrace "Good Enough": Let go of all-or-nothing thinking. Small, consistent actions lead to lasting change more effectively than striving for perfection.
3. Remember the Seven Keys: Clarity on what habit you want to form, understanding your "why," and taking small, actionable steps can significantly aid in behavior improvement.

• Visit Jason’s Website: Read Jason’s insightful blog posts and subscribe to his newsletter for more tips on health and wellness.
• Join the Boomer Banter Community: Engage with us and become part of the conversation on aging well. Follow the link and click on Connect with Us
• Support our sponsor: Road Scholar is the leading non-profit travel site for Boomers and Beyond

Mentioned in this episode:

Road Scholar Great Global Giveaway

roadscholar.org/heyboomer

In this episode our host, Wendy Green, and her guest, Nancy Ruffner delve into the intricate world of patient advocacy and elder care.

We begin with a personal story about the sudden passing of our host's stepfather, her mother's hospitalization with Covid, and the struggle she faced as her siblings were also struck by the virus, all in the same week. This story sets the stage for a deeper exploration into the importance of patient advocacy.

Nancy Ruffner, a board-certified patient advocate, brings her wealth of experience from social work and elder care, emphasizing how community and purpose are central to aging well. Nancy explains how patient advocates educate and guide individuals through complex care settings, medical decisions, financial concerns, and housing transitions.

Wendy and Nancy share personal stories of navigating caregiving and the complexity of the healthcare system and all that goes with it.

Importance of Asking for Help

A significant theme is recognizing when to seek assistance and understanding that it is a sign of strength, not weakness.

Role of Patient Advocates

Patient advocates provide vital, unbiased support, especially since their services are not constrained by insurance mandates. They help with everything from medical decisions to navigating insurance challenges.

Building a Support Network

For solo agers, creating a "micro board of directors" of trusted individuals to assist with medical needs and decision-making is crucial.

Education and Coaching

Both Wendy and Nancy underscore the value of educational resources and coaching in caregiving, especially for those adjusting to the evolving roles with aging parents.

Reach Nancy Ruffner on her website or email her.

Find Directories for Patient Advocates on these sites:

Greater National Advocates

National Association of Healthcare Advocacy

Health Advocate X

Solace

Connect with Boomer Banter

Email

Facebook

LinkedIn

Website

Mentioned in this episode:

CareLink 360

If you are a long distant caregiver would you like to easily connect, face-to-face with your loved one? The Digital Health Companion™ from CareLink360 is a safe, secure, and easy to use device that fosters regular social interactions.