The Athletic's Adam Hurrey and Charlie Eccleshare are joined by broadcaster and 90s football video legend Nick Hancock for the latest edition of Mesut Haaland Dicks. Among Nick's selections for his footballing fascinations and irritations are the mundane details of timewasting, our evolving expectations of footballers' intellect, the curious mind games behind the late fitness test, manufactured matchday atmosphere, the vagaries of the football disciplinary process and lazy football merchandising.

Meanwhile, the Adjudication Panel discuss whether football shorts really need pockets, Dayot Upamecano's voice coaching from an opera singer and a new level in weird goalnet sounds.

Produced by Mike Stavrou.

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