Botched Archives

Botched Archives

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Botched Archives episodes

  • Tweener 4 - The Emancipation Vexation

    Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! We are counting down to the kick

    off of Season 4! The obviously very drunk cast is even more inept than usual. They
    continue to descend further into the depths of the mine in search of the
    legendary immortality giving item. They’ve already run into murderous chickens,
    worms and made some goblin friends. This time around they have to contend with elevators,
    fake news, and of course, doors. Is their newest goblin addition a true ally? How
    long before the party tries to kill him? How drunk are Conrad and Tristan? Is
    it racist to pick on the Scottish and/or Irish? Tune in and find out!

    1 hr 27 min
  • Tweener 3 - Getting Clucked Up

    Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Another set of in between episodes

    to tide you over until we get to season 4. In this particular story a group of
    would be adventurers have heard a legend of some artifact that grants immorality.
    Joined by our guest Conrad, we stumble through a puzzle dungeon. Light on
    puzzles, heavy on chickens. What awaits in this mine or horrors? Why shouldn’t
    you open doors that say don’t open? What’s that clucking sound? Tune in and
    find out!

    1 hr 43 min
  • Tweener 2 - A Touch Too Much

    Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Botched is nothing if not

    predictable. Of course they run around touching everything imaginable to gain
    as many mutations possible. While of course, damning everyone they touch. Where
    exactly are they? They seem to be in a science lab. But, is the lab on Earth,
    or is it somewhere else? Is this the future or the present? Is there any danger
    touching things as many times as humanly possible? So, the table has 500
    possible mutations. How bad could they be? What are they going to do to get out
    of this situation? Tune in and find out!

    1 hr 17 min
  • Tweener 1 - He's Got the Touch!

    Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Well folks that’s a wrap for season 3! Now that it’s over you know what that means. In betweeners! Short stories until season 4 comes out. This story starts us out in a strange medical facility. A bunch of tube people coming out of a long sleep. There has been a terrible virus which has wiped out most of humanity. The party feels fine, but everyone else seems horrified to get anywhere close to them. Why are they in test tubes? What happened to humanity? Why aren't they allowed to people? What are frog eyes? Tune in and find out!

    1 hr 6 min
  • Solving Problems the American Way

    Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Are you guys ready for more

    torture porn? Just kidding, the group has more important things to do. The fate
    of the world is on the line after all. Having only gained a little information
    in that the spy they found was a decoy, the group has to figure out what to do
    next. However, they won’t have a lot of time to ponder as the final battle gets
    under way. The demons are attacking from all around and above, and even the skies
    seem to be against the Knights of the Phoenix. The only ones standing between The
    Warlock and the innocent people hiding in the stronghold are our fearless psychopaths…and
    Nachio Del Grande…and King Casey Diya…and an army of dinosaurs. What is the
    groups master plan? How can they stop the Warlock? What happens if they make it
    out alive? Where the hell are all the elves anyways? Tune in and find out!

    1 hr 17 min
  • Goin' Medieval

    Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! The guys are on a roll! They actually found out what the demon cultists’ plans are. After heading back to the stronghold of the Knights of the Phoenix they need to discover who the traitor is before they can enact their plan. Spirits are low amongst the population, but that doesn’t really mean much to our bullies, I mean group. They need to find the traitor before the crown of madness is put on Kory’s head. With the aid of King Casey Diya, they will begin their investigation on two fronts. How are they going to find the traitor? What are they going to do when they find who they think it is? Is the Geneva Convention a thing in this universe? What is the punishment for eating raptor meat? Tune in and find out!

    1 hr 35 min
  • Keyser Whodey

    Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! The guys could be setting a record for the most successful endeavor they’ve ever attempted. Granted, MOGAR, is about as sneaky as two feral cats in heat. MOGAR is also not the best at being intelligent, deceitful, convincing or really anything other than a screaming murder monster. The group is going to find out that this camp has a secret police who will interrogate them. Now, any other sane minded individual would have a better way to logic their way out…but this is Botched, and they’re a bunch of idiots. Will the group make it past the secret police? What sort of interrogation techniques do they use? Who are the leaders of this cult? Will all their names be Mexican foods? Tune in and find out!

    1 hr 26 min
  • Up to Our Eyes with A-Holes

    Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Holy shit the party actually managed to accomplish a goal! Who knew it was possible?! Now they have another goal. Can they make it two for two? The group must venture past enemy lines of demons to find the hidden encampment and figure out what the hell is going on in the world. However, outside of the safety of the forest there are hundreds and thousands of demons. The group must sneak (or not) through the hostile forces and find this mysterious encampment. Will the group manage to sneak around enough to find it? How will they manage to get by all the demons? What is in this encampment? How stupid is Mogar? Tune in and find out!

    1 hr 29 min
  • The Rise and Fall of Uncoolio

    Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! The group must convince King Casey Dilla to join the Knights of the Phoenix army against the hordes of demons encroaching on one of the refuges. However, the King is a greased-up bro who has no interest in such things. The group has been invited to a party in the King’s honor. Our heroes however, are very overdressed. They will have to pick their favorite oils and get ready for an evening of partying and competition. Hann will receive a new title throughout the kingdom, and he will love it so very much. What is this title? Will the group convince the King to join them? What are the effects of eating so much wood? Tune in and find out!

    1 hr 23 min
  • A High Fiber Diet

    Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Four chapters down, one to go! Welcome to the last chapter of our third season. We start off with characters we have never met before, but in a semi-familiar place. The world is in complete chaos. Rips in the fabric of space time have opened around the world and people are being slaughtered left and right. The only safe place left in the world seems to be the Knights of the Phoenix stronghold as refugees pour in. The magical ley lines of the world are in disarray. Any attempt to use magic results in catastrophic results. Demons and monsters roam the world. Commander Nachio Del Grande assembles his generals to give out his last orders. If these missions are unsuccessful, the world as we know it will end. Who are these mysterious generals? What is the top-secret mission? Is there no other safe place in this world? What are the health benefits of eating wood? Tune in and find out!

    1 hr 40 min

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Not long ago deep in the Appalachian wilds, a group of misfits joined forces to play dungeon’s and dragons. Inspired by boredom and equipped with loose morals and a questionable understanding of the…