Breaking Free

Simon Gilligan is a seventy-six year old man who has been inspiring me to work harder at the gym because of his stamina and commitment which inspired me so much that I wanted to share his story on Breaking Free today. Simon was suffering with illnesses that the Doctor's had no remedy for and so he decided to lose weight and get healthy. He started only three years ago and has found a new zest for life since then and can do more pushups than I can !

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WARNING:

The stories in this episode may trigger you and result in flashbacks if you yourself have experienced any form of abuse in the past but have no clear memory of it as the trauma was too painful and your subconscious may have suppressed it.

Discussed in this episode :

The difference between sexual harassment and sexual abuse (1:00)

Different types of sexual assault (2:15)

Defining child sexual abuse (2:45)

Reasons why most victims don't report sexual abuse (4:13)

How sexual abuse impacts health (5:35)

Celebrities who spoke up as survivors of sexual abuse (6:00)

My own personal story of sexual assault at the age of nine (7:00)

Revisiting the place where my assault took place thirty-eight years later (12:28)

Several stories of sexual assault that happened to a woman by someone she knew, a complete stranger and her own husband (marital rape) (15:00)

Child sexual abuse story that happened at the age four (17:56)

Sexual abuse stories of a young boy by his teachers at school (21:20)

The pressure of needing to act more masculine as a young man in order to protect the self from being blamed that being effeminate encouraged the sexual abuse (25:20)

A story of sexual abuse by teachers at University and the impact it had on damaging intimacy or relationships with men years later (29:28)

A man's story of sexual assault that resulted in blackmail (34:10)

A woman's story of sexual and physical assault by a stranger whom she took to court (35:23)

Dating app. story of male harassment (39:21)

A disturbing account of a young girl molested by her adult cousin who raped many other children. This story is read by an actress (43:26)

Resources mentioned:

National sexual violence resource centre :

https://www.nsvrc.org/publications/fact-sheets

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My guest Madian Al Jazerah is a successful businessman and human rights activist living in Jordan. His story is a story of searching for identity and worth.

In Part two of the episode of Breaking Free- On sexuality, he shares an honest account of how the Gulf war left him knowing what it was like to be a refugee, coping with depression and having to go into witness protection in San Francisco after being gay bashed and much more.

He is described in the preface of his incredible memoir " ARE YOU THIS? OR ARE YOU THIS? " as:

"A Palestinian but wasn't raised in Palestine, Kuwaiti-born but not Kuwaiti, British-educated but not a westerner, a gay man out of the closet but still living in the shadows."

Things we talk about :

• The impact of the Gulf war on Madian and his family (2:00)
• A dark time in Madian's life (7:30)
• Saved by Ellen in San Francisco and outed as Gay (9:30)
• Learning to lie from a young age (11.00)
• Madian comes out to his siblings by FedEX when he thinks he has cancer (12:00)
• Witness protection (15:00)
• Moving to Jordan and finding familiar faces from Madian's life back in Kuwait (16:20)
• Succeeding in business with Zuwwadeh restaurant and Books@cafe (18:00)
• The hell of living in Limbo in Texas (26:35)
• New York, abuse and recognizing a victim pattern (28:00)
• Madian's search for his real name and identity after the loss of his father (32:00)
• Visiting Jenin (35:45)

Madian Al Jazerah's memoir ARE YOU THIS ? OR ARE YOU THIS? :

https://www.amazon.co.uk/s?k=are+you+this+or+are+you+this&crid=49BWXDYWQMHR&ref=nb_sb_ss_ts-doa-p_1_12

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My guest on Breaking Free today is Madian Al Jazerah. A successful businessman and human rights activist living in Jordan.

He is described in the preface of his incredible memoir " ARE YOU THIS? OR ARE YOU THIS? " as:

"A Palestinian but wasn't raised in Palestine, Kuwaiti-born but not Kuwaiti, British-educated but not a westerner, a gay man out of the closet but still living in the shadows."

A story of identity and worth.Madian shares an honest account of discovering his sexuality, struggling with identity living as a Palestinian born in Kuwait and much more in PART ONE of this episode.

WARNING: Topics such as molestation, rape and homosexuality are discussed in this episode

Things we talk about :

• Childhood stories escaping the bombing in Jenin - occupied Palestine (1:40)
• Trauma and fear of balloons (6:00)
• Madian's fascination with planes and a long trip to HongKong (8:00)
• Molestation, emotional rape and shame (12:00)
• Experiencing homophobia in Oklahoma at age 16 (18:40)
• How past trauma effects how we respond to others (23:30)
• Forgotten stories of powerful women (27:25)

Madian Al Jazerah's memoir ARE YOU THIS ? OR ARE YOU THIS? :

https://www.amazon.co.uk/s?k=are+you+this+or+are+you+this&crid=49BWXDYWQMHR&ref=nb_sb_ss_ts-doa-p_1_12

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In today's episode about bullying, I talk to Lisa Hunter who was born and raised in South Africa and moved to the UK in 2001. Lisa struggled with bullying herself from the age of 16 at a new school.

It was the support of her family and a very special biology teacher, which helped her cope with some of the darkest of times when she contemplated taking her own life. She then went on to experience bullying again as an adult in the workplace. Robert was a very close friend of Lisa's in Johannesburg who died of suicide after coming out as a gay man to his parents but was rejected and bullied by the whole community. Robert was unable to find support at the time and Lisa founded Robert’s Wish in 2015 so that no-one else need go through the loneliness that Robert felt. She works extensively supporting the LGBTQ community, youth and parents navigate their way through various challenges related to bullying and strives to make a difference where possible.

WARNING: Suicide is discussed in this episode

Points discussed in this episode:

• How Lisa begun to be bullied at the age of 16 when she moved from Johannesburg to a new school in the UK and then in the workplace as an adult (1:20)
• What helped Lisa cope at school (4:46)
• Getting an apology years later (7:52)
• What thought stopped Lisa from taking her own life, when she felt all hope was lost (8:26)
• Cyber bullying (9:28)
• The power of listening (10:30)
• Simple ways you can feel less alone and vulnerable (12:45)
• The reason behind founding Robert's Wish (17:37)
• Why bullies bully (21:45)

Connect with Lisa:

https://robertswish.com

https://www.instagram.com/robertswishapp/

https://www.facebook.com/RobertsWishApp/

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My Guest and beautiful friend Houda Echouafni describes herself as a human, mother, actor and everything in between. Born to a Moroccan mother and an Egyptian father who died when she was young, she moved to England when she was eleven years old and had to learn English to cope in a London secondary school.

She then discovered drama and a love for Shakespeare and decided to train as an actor.

Houda started out as a presenter with MBC and worked in film, TV and was in a production with the Royal Shakespeare company until the outbreak of the Covid virus brought a lot of stress and change. Not long after, Houda discovered she was losing hair very quickly and is now learning to live with Alopecia as she continues to raise and homeschool her four children.

This episode will discuss :

Houda's childhood memories of her life in Morocco where she was raised by her grandmother (1:10)

The challenges of moving to England (age 11), managing in an Inner city secondary school in London without speaking English (3:30)

Finding expression outside of language in drama class was a revelation (10:20)

Drama school adventures (13:00)

Discovering hair loss and learning about the autoimmune disease Alopecia (17:00)

Wigs and an empowering moment (28:00)

How finding a tribe and community for support and solutions was vital (29:00)

Questions about choice, hair and hijab (35:00)

Connect with Houda:

https://www.instagram.com/houdaechouafni/

https://www.imdb.com/name/nm1445342/

https://www.facebook.com/houdaechouafniactresss/

https://www.linkedin.com/in/houda-echouafni-37074622

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Resources mentioned:

Brit school: https://www.brit.croydon.sch.uk

Microblading

https://www.diniwigs.com/coping-with-hair-loss/

Magnetic eyelashes

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My guest Tala Khalaf is a vibrant, positive soul with big dreams who happens to be the manager of my favorite cafe in Jordan and is struggling to break free from more than one challenge in her life. This episode discusses how Identity ( citizenship and gender ) has restricted Tala from achieving her lifelong dream of becoming a commercial pilot .

This episode discusses:

The struggle to travel as a Palestinian (01:40)

How Tala discovers her passion of becoming a pilot (04:15)

Depression and change of career (07:00)

Tala starts working at sixteen in pottery which leads her to an opportunity in aviation (10:00)

A health issue complicates future plans (14:45)

Bullying, harassment and gender identity discrimination (19:00)

The difference between gender identity and sexual preference (24:00)

Finding answers (26:00)

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Susie Tamim is an Irish spiritual guide, psychic and Reiki master who lives and works in Amman, Jordan. Her memoir "Only Time Will Tell" is a personal journey of faith and attunement through the healing powers of universal energy. I thoroughly enjoyed not only reading it but also narrating the audio book, available for Free on Youtube. Susie's life has been one adventure and challenge after the other and talking to her about her second book on Breaking Free, sounds like there is far more excitement to come.

This episode includes:

A short clip from Susie's audio book Only Time Will Tell (00:50)

Susie loses her mother when she was 14 years old but receives a special message through a medium years later (2:15)

How Susie becomes a medium (3:40)

Susie joins Royal Jordanian Airline as a flight attendant and moves to Jordan (5:15)

Discovering healing abilities (7:30)

How a young Palestinian boy in a coma teaches Susie patience and how to believe in herself (10:00)

Susie has a near death experience after a burst appendix (12:00)

Susie survives a serious car crash (15:40)

My mystical journeys and initiations (20:22)

Susie's message to us all (22:30)

Connect with Susie:

https://www.facebook.com/susie.tamim.35

https://Instagram.com/susie.tamim.35

References:

Only time will tell - FREE Audio book:

https://youtu.be/gBeSjqTy27Q

Only time will tell on Amazon:

https://www.amazon.com/Only-Time-Will-Tell-Attunement/dp/1530485614/ref=sr_1_fkmr0_1?dchild=1&keywords=only+time+will+tell+susie+tasmim&qid=1628539838&s=books&sr=1-1-fkmr0

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Today's episode of Breaking Free is about what it feels like to be female. What privilege really means and how gender inequality impacts us all.

I include a checklist a poem and a snippet from a book I am enjoying at the moment. I highlight some of the many challenges women face and why there is a need for feminism even though many positive changes in the last 120 years for women.

Today I discuss:

How male privilege hurts men too (2:00)

A male privilege checklist by Maisha Z. Johnson (3:10)

What Caitlin Moran says about feminism in her book 'More than a woman'(11:55)

Patriarchy is the enemy of both men and women (16:00)

Camille Rainville's poem 'Be a Lady they said' (17:00)

References:

https://everydayfeminism.com/2016/02/160-examples-of-male-privilege/

Be a lady they said :https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z8ZSDS7zVdU

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/49397893-more-than-a-woman

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This episode of Breaking Free is a special one, recorded from my home in Amman-Jordan with my Dad as my guest. My father dreamt of becoming a pilot when he grew up, it seemed like an impossible dream as the fifth child in a big family with very little income or education.

I love how he didn't let this stop him from believing and eventually manifesting his dream. He taught himself English from magazines and dictionaries, studied flight manuals and saved up money working as an electronic technician in the Gulf till he managed to reach a flight school in America. His goals didn't stop there and unexpected surprises from the Universe were around every corner, one of which was a very special meeting with His Majesty King Hussein of Jordan.

Today, we discuss:

The early days growing up with Kurdish/ Circassian parents in Jordan as a middle child of nine siblings (2:00)

Joining the army and training as an electronic technician (6:10)

How his eldest brother sent him to the frontline in Qibya, Palestine as punishment just before the massacre in 1953 by Ariel Sharon (10.44)

A job in Qatar and Kuwait helps him save the money he needs for flight school (16:00)

From Liverpool to New York in nine days by boat and a 6 day trip by bus to L.A.(21:30)

A surprise visit by King Hussein of Jordan (23:00)

Training in France on a jet caravelle and hired as a first officer in Royal Jordanian airlines (26:00)

Trained on the Boeing 707 (28:10)

A move to Iran Air that was cut short by the Islamic Revolution in 1978-79 (28:45)

Tri-star and bigger dreams (30:22)

After retirement (34:22)

What my Father would say to his younger self and younger generations (35:19)

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