The boys witness their beloved Browns clobber the Jets on Thursday night and benefit from playoff clarity courtesy of inevitable MVP, Lamar Jackson and the Baltimore Ravens.

The boys drink plenty of fluids, eschew bed rest, and succumb to Flacco fever in the wake of yet another gaudy aerial explosion by Joe Flacco, Amari Cooper, and the playoff-bound Cleveland Browns against the Houston Texans.

The boys celebrate a sober Sunday before Victory Monday, temper expectations for playoff success, and witness a depleted Cleveland Browns roster gut out an unlikely win against da scrappy Chicago Bears.

The boys learn to live in the moment, fan without baggage, and simply enjoy the Cleveland Browns sound victory over the Jacksonville Jaguars, playing in games that matter, and winning in the month of December.

The boys wrap up a disastrous trip out west, endure another anemic defensive effort, and maybe finally find a quarterback for the stretch run in a decisive loss to the surging Los Angeles Rams.

The boys inexplicably pass the ball a million times versus a poor Denver Broncos rush defense, suffer a rash of alarming injuries, and find themselves stuck out west — pinning their waning playoff hopes on a recently unemployed quarterback.

The boys look back fondly on Isiah Crowell’s celebratory end zone dump and bask in the afterglow of a methodical Cleveland Browns victory over the inexplicably, frustratingly, and annoyingly competitive Pittsburgh Steelers.

The boys tolerate another semi-inspirational Kevin Stefanski locker room reading of advanced analytics and beat the oblivious bastards who heartlessly celebrated when they stole our team with a stunning 33-31 victory over the poorly rebranded 1944-1995 Cleveland Browns.

The boys take care of business against the Arizona Cardinals, draw up an explosive offense in the dirt, and find themselves at the crossroads of 2023 season with back to back matchups against the dreaded Baltimore Ravens and Pittsburgh Steelers.

The boys lose sleep in Seattle as they watch PJ Walker’s fairy tale win streak come to a predictable end and apologize to Deshaun Watson for lobbing bombs, egregious hot takes, and tin-foil hat fandom.