It's time to clear the docket! Is your husband allowed to text you during the workday? Is your sister lying about a honeydew allergy? What is the correct number of lamps? All this and much more, including the best diss we ever heard yelled at a parade.

Have a dispute that you can’t settle? Are you a hockey lover, a book-tok lover, or just…a lover in general? We are gathering your most HEATED Rivalries slash disputes for a very special upcoming episode. We’ll pass judgment on everything from hockey etiquette to your favorite literary smut (said with support and affection)! Submit your cases directly to the court at: maximumfun.org/jjho

---

Judge John Hodgman is member-supported! Become a member to unlock special bonus episodes and more. Memberships start at just $5 a month. Just tap here!